Man's side-splitting monologue on why 'women don't want to date' is frighteningly accurate

There's been a lot of discourse on the state of modern dating and a lot of theories on why it seems harder than ever for people to find connection with romantic partners. Could it be that the achievement and education gaps between men and women are altering the dynamics? Have social media and dating apps broken our brains and hearts? Do we all have unrealistic expectations and unlimited options, leading to never feeling satisfied with anything or anyone?

Those are all intriguing options, but an alternate theory has recently arisen that's quickly gaining steam: Maybe being single isn't as lonely as we think. Maybe being single is actually freaking awesome.

Happy Girl GIF by RetMod Giphy

A guy on TikTok who goes by @gettothepointbro shared a hilarious monologue on why women who have been single for a long time "don't want to date anymore." Women say he absolutely nailed it.

At first, it might seem like he's poking fun, either at single women or at the men who can't seem to win them over. But not so! What he's done is perfectly captured the joy many people find in being single and, frankly, able to do whatever the hell they want.

"Some women have been single for so long they don't date anymore, they grant you access to their peaceful little empire like a reluctant queen handing you a visitor's badge," he says. "You text her good morning and she's already annoyed, like 'Why are you disturbing the sacred silence of my personal growth journey?'"

He goes on, "Bro she's been sleeping diagonally in her bed for three years, she's not giving up that territory because you opened the door and paid for coffee."

"You plan a cute date, she's thinking 'That sounds nice but also I could stay home, deep clean my apartment, do a 12 steps skincare routine, order sushi and not have to listen to a man breathe.'"

Woman enjoying some self care time.Canva Photos

"You try to check in emotionally, 'How are you feeling?' She's feeling fantastic because you're not here."

"You're not competing with other guys. There are no other guys. You're competing with her weighted blanket, her peace, her cat named Chairman Meow, and the simple joy of not having to share her fries."

These are just a few of the best lines from the nearly two-minute rant, all delivered in the most amazing French accent you can imagine. Please, enjoy:

The best thing about the video is the discussion in the comments. Women want to know how this man got access to this top-secret information. The rant is so eerily, frighteningly accurate that women are convinced this French guy is living in their heads. That, or someone's secretly leaking intel.

"dammit. somebody call a meeting of the council. he knows too much."

"I dont often offer this compliment to the male species but you explained it better than I ever could."

"Alright, who’s told him this info??? So exposed right now"

"The joy of sleeping diagonally across my bed cannot be fully explained."

"This is the most accurate profiling I’ve ever heard. You absolutely ailed it."

Clearly, we've tapped into a real phenomenon here, with users lovingly calling him The Croissant King.

The truth is that many people—both men and women—are disillusioned with the sad state of the dating scene these days. App burnout is a real thing, and meeting new people in real life is a ton of work. So, it's no surprise that more and more people are just choosing to stay single and enjoy all the perks that come along with it. This is a stark change, especially for women.

According to FiveThirtyEight, "Women were also more likely than men to say that they weren’t dating because they have other priorities right now." Priorities like travel, career, friendship, and even just self-care—all things that wind up taking a backseat when people get involved in relationships. It wasn't too long ago that women of a certain age that were still single were called "spinsters," but that word has lost a significant amount of power. This new generation of women aren't embarrassed or ashamed to be single; they're loving it for exactly all the reasons this video describes.

And to make matters even more interesting, Vogue recently published an opinion piece from writer and podcaster Chanté Joseph simply titled, "Is Having a Boyfriend Embarrassing Now?" In the mega-viral piece, Joseph interviewed lots of women and, based on their answers, explores a budding new era of women finding their boyfriends or even the simple idea and prospect of a boyfriend "embarrassing."

Some say it's because of too much "boyfriend content" on social media. Others note the issue seems to be that once a woman gets a boyfriend, her entire personality (and social media) revolves around him. Other women cite being embarrassed by men's behavior and the oft-experienced paradox of losing the relationship the moment it's made public (i.e. the "hard launch" to breakup pipeline). That said, women would rather keep their boyfriends on the down low for privacy and to avoid the "evil eye" as Joseph reveals, or else do the next best thing and stay happily single.

A lot of people have a lot of thoughts about Joseph's piece, its virality, and what that means for the current state of dating and relationships worldwide. CNN even caught up with Joseph to understand more about her piece and the polarizing response to it. Watch:

We may not yet have a final answer on where this shift in women's attitudes toward dating will land, but one thing's for sure: whether you're single or partnered, embarrassed or proud, Croissant King's take is resonating with the masses.

This article originally appeared in April. It has been updated.