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upworthy
Pop Culture

Husband praised for explaining his definition of a woman's 'true beauty'

"Is this man an actual unicorn?"

beauty standards, patriarchy, marriage
@chrissyjpowers/TikTok

This guy gets it.

One woman was so floored by her husband's kind and poignant words regarding the unfair beauty standards women continue to endure that she decided to record them. And people can’t get enough of the clip.

“Tell me what you just said, it was so brilliant,” says Chrissy Powers in her TikTok video. “I just looked at a picture of ... Jennifer Lopez. And I said, ‘How does she look that good at 50 something?’ And you said ...”

“I said she spends millions of dollars on herself to look like that ... That's the problem with patriarchal culture,” he responds before diving into an incredibly insightful, totally uplifting speech.


“The patriarchal culture tells women that if they don't look like a celebrity, their value is, like, nothing,” he continues, referencing a joke made by comedian Bill Burr about how men go to the movies and see a shirtless, buff Brad Pitt but don’t internalize any shame around it.

“We know we can't, so we just accept it. We are just us,” he quips.

The conversation then hones in on how there’s a double standard specifically when it comes to aging.

Powers says, “If we see women getting old, then we say, ‘She let herself go.’” and her husband immediately links that mentality to a falsehood promoted by capitalism.

“The idea that a woman is only valuable when they're between the ages of 18 and 25. That's ridiculous,” he says. “Listen, women have to stop believing the lies that the patriarchal culture machine tells them, that their value is only because they look young. It's ridiculous.”

via GIPHY

“Aging is not the problem,” he attests. In fact, when his wife asks if he thinks she is hotter now than when they first met, this is his thoughtful response:

“Oh, 100%. Oh, God, you're so much more beautiful. I mean, you were hot then. But you have…there is a wholeness to your beauty now because it comes with wisdom,” he tells her. “It comes with inner knowing. It comes with doing the work that is required to get to this point. Because if you're not growing, you're stuck. So you're doing the beautiful work of the change, the lasting change of moving forward, which is wisdom.”

And now for his mic-drop moment:

“Women who can love themselves for how beautiful they are…that’s what so attractive to any man.”

Um, yeah. This guy is a keeper.

@chrissyjpowers Sunday Sermon: How the patriarchy makes women question their beauty and then makes money of their insecurities. #realbeauty #aginggracefully #embracingaging #consciousrelationships ♬ original sound - Chrissy Powers

And perhaps the best part? During the entire conversation, their young daughter sat absorbing what Powers captioned as “true beauty” being defined by a “conscious man.” Talk about leading by example.

So far, over 280,000 people have viewed Powers’ post, and women have flooded the comments section sharing how much her husband’s words meant to them.

“When you said ‘there is a wholeness to your beauty now...’ tears came. Women aren't told this enough if at all. So, we learn to tell ourselves. Thank you”

Another joked, “Is this man an actual unicorn?”

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