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How I found my life's passion by asking myself these ridiculous questions.

'What's your favorite flavor of shit sandwich, and does it come with an olive?'

One day, when my brother was 18, he waltzed into the living room and proudly announced to my mother and me that one day he was going to be a senator.

My mom probably gave him the “That’s nice, dear,” treatment while I’m sure I was distracted by a bowl of Cheerios or something.

Photo via iStock.


But for 15 years, this purpose informed all my brother’s life decisions: what he studied in school, where he chose to live, who he connected with, and even what he did with many of his vacations and weekends.

And, now, after almost half a lifetime of work , he’s the chairman of a major political party in his city and the youngest judge in the state. In the next few years, he hopes to run for office for the first time.

Don’t get me wrong. My brother is a freak. This basically never happens.

Most of us have no clue what we want to do with our lives. Even after we finish school. Even after we get a job. Even after we’re making money. Between ages 18 and 25, I changed career aspirations more often than I changed my underwear. And even after I had a business, it wasn’t until I was 28 that I clearly defined what I wanted for my life.

Chances are you’re more like me and have no clue what you want to do. It’s a struggle almost every adult goes through: “What do I want to do with my life?” “What am I passionate about?” “What do I not suck at?” I often receive emails from people in their 40s and 50s who still have no clue what they want to do with themselves.

Part of the problem is the concept of “life purpose” itself. The idea that we were each born for some higher purpose and it’s now our cosmic mission to find it. This is the same kind of shaky logic used to justify things like spirit crystals or that your lucky number is 34 (but only on Tuesdays or during full moons).

Here’s the truth: We exist on this Earth for some undetermined period of time. During that time, we do things. Some of these things are important. Some of them are unimportant. And those important things give our lives meaning and happiness. The unimportant ones basically just kill time.

When people say, “What should I do with my life?” or “What is my life purpose?” what they’re actually asking is: “What can I do with my time that is important?”

This is an infinitely better question to ask. It’s far more manageable and it doesn’t have all the ridiculous baggage the “life purpose” question has. There’s no reason for you to be contemplating the cosmic significance of your life while sitting on your couch eating Doritos. Rather, you should be getting off your ass and discovering what feels important to you.

One of the most common email questions I get is people asking me what they should do with their lives, what their “life purpose” is. This is an impossible question for me to answer. After all, for all I know this person is really into knitting sweaters for kittens or filming gay bondage porn in their basement. I have no clue. Who am I to say what’s right or what’s important to them?

Photo via iStock.

After some research, I put together a series of questions to help people figure out for themselves what is important to them and what can add more meaning to their lives.

These questions are by no means exhaustive or definitive. In fact, they’re a little bit ridiculous. But I made them that way because discovering purpose in our lives should be something that’s fun and interesting, not a chore.

1. What's your favorite flavor of shit sandwich, and does it come with an olive?

Ah, yes. The all-important question. What flavor of shit sandwich would you like to eat? Because here’s the sticky little truth about life that they don’t tell you at high school pep rallies: Everything sucks, some of the time.

Now, that probably sounds incredibly pessimistic of me. And you may be thinking, “Hey, Mr. Manson, turn that frown upside-down.”

But I actually think this is a liberating idea.

Everything involves sacrifice. Everything includes some sort of cost. Nothing is pleasurable or uplifting all the time. So the question becomes: What struggle or sacrifice are you willing to tolerate? Ultimately, what determines our ability to stick with something we care about is our ability to handle the rough patches and ride out the inevitable rotten days.

If you want to be a brilliant tech entrepreneur but you can’t handle failure, then you’re not going to make it far. If you want to be a professional artist but you aren’t willing to see your work rejected hundreds — if not thousands — of times, then you’re done before you start. If you want to be a hotshot court lawyer but can’t stand the 80-hour work weeks, then I’ve got bad news for you.

What unpleasant experiences are you able to handle? Are you able to stay up all night coding? Are you able to have people laugh you off the stage over and over again until you get it right? Are you able to put off starting a family for 10 years?

What shit sandwich do you want to eat? Because we all get served one eventually. Might as well pick one with an olive.

2. What is true about you today that would make your 8-year-old self cry?

When I was a child, I used to write stories. I used to sit in my room for hours by myself writing away about aliens, superheroes, great warriors, my friends and family. Not because I wanted anyone to read it. Not because I wanted to impress my parents or teachers. But for the sheer joy of it.

And then, for some reason, I stopped. And I don’t remember why.

We all have a tendency to lose touch with what we loved as a child. Something about the social pressures of adolescence and professional pressures of young adulthood squeezes the passion out of us. We’re taught that the only reason to do something is if we’re rewarded for it in some way.

It wasn’t until I was in my mid-20s that I rediscovered how much I loved writing. And it wasn’t until I started my business that I remembered how much I enjoyed building websites — something I did in my early teens just for fun.

The funny thing, though, is that if my 8-year-old self had asked my 20-year-old self, “Why don’t you write anymore?” and I replied, “Because I’m not good at it” or “Because nobody would read what I write” or “Because you can’t make money doing that,” not only would I have been completely wrong, but that 8-year-old version of myself would have probably started crying.

3. What makes you forget to eat and poop?

We’ve all had that experience where we get so wrapped up in something that minutes turn into hours and hours turn into “Holy crap, I forgot to have dinner.”

Supposedly, in his prime, Isaac Newton’s mother had to regularly come in and remind him to eat because he would go entire days so absorbed in his work that he would forget.

I used to be like that with video games. This probably wasn’t a good thing. In fact, it was kind of a problem for many years. I would sit and play video games instead of doing more important things, like studying for an exam, showering regularly, or speaking to other humans face-to-face.

It wasn’t until I gave up the games that I realized my passion wasn’t for the games themselves (although I do love them): My passion is for improvement, being good at something and then trying to get better. The games themselves — the graphics, the stories — were cool, but I can easily live without them. It’s the competition — with others, but especially with myself — that I thrive on.

And when I applied that obsessiveness for improvement and self-competition to an internet business and to my writing, well, things took off in a big way.

Maybe for you, it’s something else. Maybe it’s organizing things efficiently or getting lost in a fantasy world or teaching somebody something or solving technical problems. Whatever it is, don’t just look at the activities that keep you up all night, but look at the cognitive principles behind those activities that enthrall you. Because they can easily be applied elsewhere.

4. How can you better embarrass yourself?

Before you are able to be good at something and do something important, you must first suck at something and have no clue what you’re doing. That’s pretty obvious. And in order to suck at something and have no clue what you’re doing, you must embarrass yourself in some shape or form, often repeatedly. And most people try to avoid embarrassing themselves — namely, because it sucks.

Ergo, due to the transitive property of awesomeness, if you avoid anything that could potentially embarrass you, then you will never end up doing something that feels important.

Yes, it seems that, once again, it all comes back to vulnerability.

Right now, there’s something you want to do, something you think about doing, something you fantasize about doing, yet you don’t do it. You have your reasons, no doubt. And you repeat these reasons to yourself ad infinitum.

But what are those reasons? Because I can tell you right now that if those reasons are based on what others would think, then you’re screwing yourself over big time.

If your reasons are something like, “I can’t start a business because spending time with my kids is more important to me,” or “Playing Starcraft all day would probably interfere with my music, and music is more important to me,” then, OK. Sounds good.

But if your reasons are, “My parents would hate it,” or “My friends would make fun of me,” or “If I failed, I’d look like an idiot,” then chances are, you’re actually avoiding something you truly care about — because caring about that thing is what scares the shit out of you, not what mom thinks or what Timmy next-door says.

Living a life avoiding embarrassment is akin to living a life with your head in the sand. Photo via iStock.

Great things are, by their very nature, unique and unconventional. Therefore, to achieve them, we must go against the herd mentality. And to do that is scary.

Embrace embarrassment. Feeling foolish is part of the path to achieving something important, something meaningful. The more a major life decision scares you, chances are the more you need to be doing it.

5. How are you going to save the world?

In case you haven’t seen the news lately, the world has a few problems. And by “a few problems,” what I really mean is, “everything is fucked and we’re all going to die.”

I’ve harped on this before (and the research also bears it out), but to live a happy and healthy life, we must hold on to values that are greater than our own pleasure or satisfaction.

So pick a problem and start saving the world. There are plenty to choose from. Our screwed-up education systems, economic development, domestic violence, mental health care, governmental corruption. Hell, I just saw an article this morning on sex trafficking in the U.S. and it got me all riled up and wishing I could do something. It also ruined my breakfast.

Find a problem you care about and start solving it. Obviously, you’re not going to fix the world’s problems by yourself, but you can contribute and make a difference. And that feeling of making a difference is ultimately what’s most important for your own happiness and fulfillment.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. “Gee, I read all this horrible stuff and I get all pissed off too, but that doesn’t translate to action, much less a new career path.”

Glad you asked …

6. If you absolutely had to leave the house all day, every day, where would you want to go and what would you do?

For many of us, the enemy is just old-fashioned complacency. We get into our routines. We distract ourselves. The couch is comfortable. The Doritos are cheesy.

And nothing new happens.

This is a problem.

What most people don’t understand is that passion is the result of action, not the cause of it.

Discovering what you’re passionate about in life and what matters to you is a full contact sport, a trial and error process. None of us knows exactly how we feel about an activity until we actually do the activity.

Ask yourself, if someone forced you to leave your house every day for everything except for sleep, how would you choose to occupy yourself? And no, you can’t just go sit in a coffee shop and browse Facebook. You probably already do that.

Let’s pretend there are no useless websites, no video games, no TV. You have to be outside of the house all day every day until it’s time to go to bed — where would you go and what would you do?

Sign up for a dance class? Join a book club? Get another degree? Invent a new form of irrigation system that can save the thousands of children’s lives in rural Africa? Learn to hang glide?

What would you do with all that time?

If it strikes your fancy, write down a few answers and then, you know, go out and actually do them. Bonus points if it involves embarrassing yourself.

7. If you knew you were going to die one year from today, what would you do and how would you want to be remembered?

Most of us don’t like thinking about death. It freaks us out. But thinking about our own death surprisingly has a lot of practical advantages. One of those advantages is that it forces us to zero in on what’s actually important in our lives and what’s just frivolous and distracting.

When I was in college, I used to walk around and ask people, “If you had a year to live, what would you do?”

As you can imagine, I was a huge hit at parties. A lot of people gave vague and boring answers. A few drinks were nearly spit on me. But it did cause people to really think about their lives in a different way and re-evaluate what their priorities were.

This man’s headstone will read: “Here lies Greg. He watched every episode of ’24.' Twice.” Photo via iStock.

What is your legacy going to be? What are the stories people are going to tell when you’re gone? What is your obituary going to say? Is there anything to say at all? If not, what would you like it to say? How can you start working toward that today?

And, again, if you fantasize about your obituary saying a bunch of badass shit that impresses a bunch of random other people, then you’re failing here.

When people feel like they have no sense of direction, no purpose in their life, it’s often because they don’t know what’s important to them or what their values are.

And when you don’t know what your values are, then you’re essentially taking on other people’s values and living other people’s priorities instead of your own. This is a one-way ticket to unhealthy relationships and eventual misery.

Discovering one’s “purpose” in life essentially boils down to finding those one or two things that are bigger than yourself and bigger than those around you.

And to find them you must get off your couch and act — and take the time to think beyond yourself, to think greater than yourself, and, paradoxically, to imagine a world without yourself.

Visit Sweden
True

It’s no secret that modern life is stressful. Burnout is an epidemic. The World Health Organization boldly stated its dedicated efforts to help people improve their health and well-being through nature.

And thanks to a new initiative, Sweden is stepping up to offer a new holistic remedy: a physician-prescribed visit to Sweden, aka “The Swedish Prescription”.

“We have made great strides in making nature/social/culture prescription a more integral part of public health in the United States– but there is still so much more to be done,” said Dr. Stacy Stryer, Associate Medical Director for Park RxAmerica.“I welcome Sweden’s initiative and hope it will help break down institutional and organizational barriers, ultimately benefiting all patients.”

AdvertisementPatients can escape to Sweden’s pristine environment for true respite. Backed by scientific data and research from Yvonne Forsell, Senior Professor at Karolinska Institutet, healthcare professionals can prescribe Sweden as a destination where patients engage in non-medical treatments and outdoor activities to ease their ailments and offer a fresh reset.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Restore body and mind with the Swedish ritual of alternating ice baths and saunas. Swim, hike or forage through silent forests, lakes, parks and nature reserves – or simply sit in the stillness. Witness the Northern Lights dancing across winter skies, or soak up the calm of the summer midnight sun. In Stockholm, Europe’s clean-air capital, take a deep breath and feel the difference.

Or skip the great outdoors and spend time embracing Sweden’s unique cultural practices. “Our cozy fika tradition [Sweden’s daily pause for coffee and conversation], our “lagom”-balanced lifestyle [the idea of “not too much, not too little”] and our easily accessible nature are a soothing balm for body and mind,” says Susanne Andersson, CEO at Visit Sweden.

Sit back in front of a masterpiece in one of Sweden’s many art museums, or head out to a live music event after browsing concert options on Swedish-founded Spotify. You might catch chart-topping hits from producer Max Martin or discover the country’s thriving metal scene. Call it an early – or late – night, and enjoy restorative sleep in Sweden’s cool night air.

Sweden is the therapeutic destination your health has been craving. Learn more about “The Swedish Prescription” and its benefits for your mental and physical health here.

Image courtesy of Reddit/Slow-moving-sloth

Foods like casseroles were popular during the 1970s.

All things old are new again—and the same goes for classic recipes.

For those who grew up during the 1970s (that's Baby Boomers and Generation Jones), staple dishes that were served at the dinner table are being rediscovered on Reddit by newer generations looking for filling, comforting, and affordable meals.

According to JSTOR, actress Liza Minelli first coined "comfort food" back in 1970. Minelli told food columnist Johna Blinn, "Comfort food is anything you just yum, yum, yum."

Meals from the 1970s are nostalgic and also budget friendly. Try making one of these comforting recipes from Redditors that will fill you up and not break the bank.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Tuna casserole

"I LITERALLY made a tuna casserole last night & had the leftovers for lunch today." - Disastrous-Soup-5413, RogerClyneIsAGod2

Turkey (or chicken) tetrazzini

"Tetrazzini is a creamy pasta dish with turkey (or chicken) chicken, mushrooms, and cheese." - Disastrous-Soup-5413

Liver and onions

"Liver and onions, mashed potatoes and a green salad made with iceberg lettuce, tomatoes cut in wedges, cucumber slices .. peeled and miracle whip salad dressing." - Kaktusblute

Quiche Lorraine

"A family favorite quiche recipe from the 1970’s. The secret? Half a cup of mayonnaise and an unreasonable quantity of cheese. My mom uses sweet onion instead of green onion, but otherwise made as written:

1/2 c. real mayonnaise
1/2 c. milk
2 eggs
1 Tbsp. corn starch
1 1/2 c. cubed cooked ham
1 1/2 c. (about 1/2 pound) chopped Swiss cheese
1/3 c. sliced green onion
Dash pepper
1 unbaked 9" pastry shell

Mix together real mayonnaise, milk, eggs and corn starch until smooth. Stir in ham, cheese, onion and pepper. Turn into pastry shell. Bake in 350 degree Fahrenheit oven 35-40 minutes until golden brown on top and knife inserted comes out clean." - banoctopus

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Cheese fondue

"For fondue, you can go in a few different directions. Cubed crusty bread is one of the classic ways to dip into cheese fondue, but you could use fruits, vegetables, chunks of cooked or cured sausages, so long as they will keep their structural integrity." - Bluecat72

Meatloaf and baked potatoes

"A basic meatloaf is ground beef, minced onions, bread crumbs, an egg and a squirt of ketchup for moisture, salt, pepper, garlic powder.. whatever you like. Get your hands in there and squish it all together until thoroughly mixed. Form into a vague loaf shape on a pan and bake at 350 for an hour. Poke a couple potatoes with a fork and cook them in the microwave for 5-7 minutes. Enjoy a meatloaf sandwich with mustard for lunch the next day 😋." - yblame

Pork chops with rice and cream of mushroom soup

"Brown the chops, take them out of the pan, pour in rice, soup and water, stir to combine. Put the pork chops on top. Cover and simmer for 20 minutes or until rice is cooked. Tossed green salad: iceberg lettuce, chopped scallions, tomatoes, cucumbers, Wishbone Italian Dressing." - hicjacket

Salmon croquettes

"Salmon croquettes were a staple of my childhood. Canned salmon, saltine crackers, and an egg. We called them croquettes but naw, they were shaped into salmon patties." - DazzlingBullfrog9, throwawaytodaycat

Mexican casserole

"Brown ground beef, stir in a can of tomato sauce and 1 sliced green onion. Mix together a cup of sour cream, a cup of cottage cheese and a can of chopped green chilies. In a 9x13 pan, layer crushed tortilla chips, meat, cream mixture and grated Colby-jack or Colby cheese. Repeat layers. Bake until hot and bubbly." - Open-Gazelle1767

Hamburger Stroganoff

"One pound ground beef, 1 package Lipton onion soup mix, 1 can cream of mushroom or chicken soup, sour cream. Brown the ground beef, stir in the can of soup and soup mix. Stir in the sour cream until it looks right...I think it's a half pint, but maybe a whole pint. Serve over rice for the 2 kids who eat rice and egg noodles for the one kid who doesn't." - Open-Gazelle1767

Shake 'N Bake Chicken

"Shake’n Bake chicken or pork chops. 'And I helped!' Preheat oven to 400F. Moisten chicken with water. Place breasts in Shake-n-Bake shaker bag. Shake the bag vigorously to coat the chicken. Bake for 20 minutes if boneless, 45 minutes if it does have bones." - Karin58

@allrecipes

Where are all the Shake n Bake girlies? 🍗 Today @nicolesperfectbite is showing you how to make this classic bread coating at home—and dare we say better than the original? 👀 #instafood #food #foodie #shakenbake #bake #chicken #breadcrumbs #paprika #garlic #onion #powder #meat #breading #bread #easy #easyrecipe #recipe #quickandeasy #weeknightdinner

Grilled cheese and tomato soup

"Still my favorite thing to eat, but now I make my own tomato bisque, my own bread, and use Gouda or cheddar. Back then Mom made this for Friday lunch: Campbell's tomato soup (made with milk) and the grilled cheese was two slices of five-loaves-for-a-dollar white bread with Velveeta, grilled with Miami Maid margarine in the Revere Ware skillet." - Mindless_Pop_632, mulberryred

Pork sausage and rice

"I grew up in the 70s and my mother made this sausage and rice dish at least once a month. The recipe is from Peg Bracken's I Hate To Cook Book. Crumble 1 to 1 1/2 pounds of pork sausage (hamburger will do, but pork is better) into a skillet and brown it. Pour off the fat. Add:

1 green pepper, chopped
2 green onions, chopped
2 or 3 celery stalks, chopped
2 c. chicken consommé or bouillon
1 c. raw rice
1 tbsp. Worcestershire sauce
1/2 tsp. salt

Put on the lid and let it simmer at lowest possible heat for 1 hour." - officerbirb

Sloppy Joes

"Classic Sloppy Joes. My family had these regularly in the ‘70s." - ThatPtarmiganAgain

Pop Culture

24 English words that mean the complete opposite of what they originally meant

There was a time when we'd want this story to be egregious and hopefully not awesome.

Fizzle used to mean fart?

If you’ve ever rolled your eyes at someone using “literally” to mean “figuratively,” you’re not alone. Every generation has its linguistic hills to die on. Words that, to some ears, have drifted too far from their “real” meaning.

But here’s the thing: words have been evolving for as long as there have been humans to speak them. Language moves the way people move, shifting through time, place, and culture. And along the way, it reinvents itself in some pretty fascinating ways.

Think about how “awful” once meant “awe-inspiring,” how “nice” used to mean “foolish,” or how “girl” once referred to any young person, not just a female one. The English we speak today is like a living history book, rewritten every time we open our mouths.

Here are a few more terrific examples (and by that we mean in the modern sense of “excellent,” not “terrifying”) that show just how dramatically English has changed. And how, in the end, everything turns out just fine.

Artificial

This one still mostly means what it has always meant, in that it refers to something not naturally made. However, it originally implied some kind of artfully or skillfully made object. Now when we say something is artificial, we are almost certainly not praising it.

Awful & Awesome

Awe” comes from either the old Norse word “agi” or the old Middle English word “ege.” Both meant terror or fear. Therefore, both “awesome” and “awful” once meant more or less the same thing: something that inspires a fearful reverence. Dread mixed with deep admiration, that kind of thing. Something awe-SOME had a little less oomph than some aw-FUL, but otherwise they carried the same meaning.

In that sense, today’s version of “awful,” i.e. something that utterly dreadful, is truer to its original iteration than “awesome,” usually denoting something generally positive.

words, etymology, language, history, cool history, word nerds, english, english language, interesting Awesome gif media1.giphy.com

Bemused

Its old meaning was "to confuse, or to stupefy,” as if you hit someone with some kind of magic spell. Merriam-Webster still defines “bemuse” this way, but colloquially we use it to convey amused pondering.

And you know what? Considering there are plenty of synonyms for "confused, we can afford to let this one go.

Bully

Crazy to think that a word originally meaning “sweetheart” now takes on a nearly opposite meaning…unless your sweetheart likes to throw you in lockers and give you swirlies. One theory is that it became associated with “ruffian” because a bully may have been a “protector of a prostitute.” Still, those that still say “bully for you!” know that it can still take on a positive context.

Condescending

In the 18th century, it was seen as a kind, generous, humble gesture when an upper class person was kind enough to talk to a lower class person instead of ignoring them or treating them like a servant (what a concept!). By the 19th century, however, the word had already developed the negative connotation we use today.

Egregious

Egregious comes from the Latin ex grege, meaning "rising above the flock." Therefore, it meant exceptional or distinguished. You could argue that today egregious still means something exceptional…just exceptionally bad.

Factoid

Factoids used to be public statements that seemed like facts, but weren’t necessarily. Fact-adjacent, if you will. Or better yet, they were bits of fake news. Now we liken factoids to fairly unimportant bits of trivia. But they’re at least accurate!

Fathom

It can be hard to fathom how this verb went from meaning “to encircle with one’s arms” to meaning understanding something complex, until you know that outstretched arms could be used to measure a fathom, which is equal to about six feet (usually in term of depth of water). Once you had a grasp on what a fathom of water was, you could better measure the depth of the sea. We might not be as seafaring as our ancestors, but we are still trying to get a better idea of the world around us.

Fizzle

The verb fizzle once referred to the act of producing quiet flatulence. In the mid-1800s, scientists began using "fizzle" to describe the sound of air or gas escaping from a narrow opening, which led to its application for a weak or sputtering noise. From there, American college students took it on to convey something that came to a sudden failure or stop after a good start, usually an answer to a professor’s question. And now, we use it to describe things that lose their gusto gradually before ending entirely. Quite a journey, for a fart word.

words, etymology, language, history, cool history, word nerds, english, english language, interesting Smiling dog media0.giphy.com

Girl

Once upon a time, “girl”, aka “gyrle” was just a gender-neutral term for a child. As for how it came to mean young woman specifically: In his book An Analytic Dictionary of the English Etymology, Anatoly Liberman noted that German words starting with “g” or “k” and ending in “r” tended to refer to living creatures “considered immature, worthless, or past their prime.” Cool, cool, cool.

Guy

This word, or eponym, rather, “Guy Fawkes,” is the fella who was part of a failed attempt to blow up British Parliament in 1605 who folks used to burn in effigy. Before “guy” just meant any ol’dude, it referred to a grotesque or scary person.

Hussy:

Interestingly enough, hussy was once just a shortened version of “housewife.” It certainly makes more sense when you look at "husewif," the Middle English spelling. Over time, the shortened version became an insult to unmarried women as though any unmarried woman, and therefore not a housewife, weren’t a full woman.

Matrix

Long before Neo took the red pill, the word “matrix,” coming from the Latin word mater (mother), meant "womb,” uterus,” or even “breeding animal.” It makes that fetus pod he breaks out of all the more disturbing.

Meat

In Old English, “meat” was just a general term for “solid food.” In the Middle Ages, the meaning began to narrow, and the term "flesh-meat" was used to specify the animal flesh used for food (which is pretty metal). So technically, you can enjoy “meat and drink” even with you vegan friends.

words, etymology, language, history, cool history, word nerds, english, english language, interesting meat media1.giphy.com

Moot Point

Originally, a moot was a formal gathering where leaders could all sit down and confer with each other, particularly over legal matters. So anything “mooted” was deemed an issue important enough to be tabled for group discussion, or even could mean “undecided and open for debate.” By the early 20th century, we see it transform to mean something not worth debating at all.

Naughty

The original “naughty” meant you were poor and had nothing, or “naught” in the way of riches. Thankfully today we use it to denote indulgent, sinfully enjoyable things. Because that’s way more fun.

Nice

This word arrived in the English language by way of Old French, where it meant foolish or weak (which makes you wonder why there’s a city in France named Nice…). During the middle ages it evolved to mean shy, reserved, or fastidious. Interestingly, it wasn’t until the mid- to late 1700s—those qualities respectable were beginning to be seen as respectable by society—that the word started to take on more pleasant meanings. Of course, we now sometimes use nice to describe someone who is pleasant enough, but a bit milquetoasty…which is kind of a full circle moment.

Nimrod

We have Bugs Bunny to thank for this one. Nimrod was the name of a skilled hunter and powerful king in the Bible. However, when Bugs sarcastically referred to Elmer Fudd as a “nimrod” in Looney Tunes, people that didn’t understand the reference thought it meant “dumb” so it changed how the word was used. At least, that’s how the most popular theory goes.

words, etymology, language, history, cool history, word nerds, english, english language, interesting Bigs Bunny. media0.giphy.com

Nonplussed

In the 16th century, to be nonplussed was to be surprised or confused. As a North American I had to reread the sentence because it didn’t make sense for the person to be unperturbed. Somehow, today we take this to mean someone that is not only not confused, but unperturbed entirely.

Peruse

If you were to peruse something in the 15th century, you’d be examining it very carefully, which is quite different from the casual, nonchalant scanning we understand it to be nowadays.

Quell

Quelling something or someone used to mean killing it, rather just subduing it. Please don’t quell anything the old-fashioned way.

Silly

In Middle English, the word seely meant happy. Blissful even.

But by the time it became silly, it had come to mean someone helpless, and therefore pitiable. From there it came to mean naive, and has since arrived at its modern meaning of ignorant or foolish.

Fun fact: In 1861, during the months of August and September, journalists would compensate for a lack of hard news by filling up newspapers with trivial stories. This period would become known as the “silly season.”

Terrific

It’s easy to see how in the 1660s, terrific meant something that filled you with terror. What’s really confounding is how it morphed into meaning something magnificent, but here we are.

Wench

Similar to girl, the Old English word wenchel referred to children of either sex. When shortened to wench, it denoted a “female child” specifically. However, its root word is likely related to the Old English wancol, meaning "unsteady" or "weak.” From here you can see how it came to mean an unsteady, and therefore lewd or wanton woman.

words, etymology, language, history, cool history, word nerds, english, english language, interesting Wench meaning media0.giphy.com

So the next time someone “literally dies laughing” or calls something “terrific,” maybe give them a pass. Words change, and that’s part of their magic. Who knows? A century from now, people might think “vibe check” referred to some kind of medieval ritual.

A waiter talking with his hands.

One of the great things about America is that we have a relatively young culture, so many of the foods that we eat were brought over from other countries. That makes America a great place to try out all the different types of food from around the world.

However, we also like to put our own stamp on staples from around the globe that give the American version its own unique flair. Some foods that we claim originated overseas were actually first made right here in the U.S. of A. For example, chimichangas, which can be found in many Mexican restaurants, actually originated in the state of Arizona. Crab Rangoon, a popular “Chinese” dish, was actually invented in San Francisco, and spaghetti and meatballs were never a thing in Italy.

TikTok creator Gabby Donahue posted a video that’s the perfect example of how some ethnic foods get remixed once they become popular in the States. In a video with over 7 million views, her father shows a waiter in Italy a photo of chicken parmesan from Olive Garden so he can order it at the restaurant. The waiter's reaction is an excellent example of someone trying to be polite while he cannot believe what he is seeing.

“My Boston Irish father trying to order a Google image of the Olive Garden chicken parm in Italy,” Donahue wrote in the text overlay.

@gabbydonahuee

@Olive Garden ‘s biggest fan 😭😭😭😭 #italy #cultureshock #chickenparm #olivegarden


When the father showed the picture to the waiter, he seemed a bit confused about the image. “Only in the States,” he said. “It doesn’t exist in Italy.” The father couldn’t believe what he was hearing: “It doesn’t exist in Italy?”

“I don’t know what it is…on the pasta?” the waiter said, trying to make sense of the chicken breast smothered in cheese and sauce. The waiter gave his final verdict while holding his chin: “No. That’s horrible.”

“Horrible? Wow. Look at that. That doesn’t,” the father laughed. “That looks good… but,” the waiter shrugged off the father. “It does look good,” the father continued. “It tastes good. I’ll tell you what, I’m gonna mail you some. I’ll send it to you.”

“Okay? Olive Garden chicken, I’m gonna search,” the waiter said, walking away from the table.


The commenters had a field day analyzing the waiter’s body language. “‘No, that looks good’ while looking completely disgusted was the most Italian reaction ever,” one commenter wrote. “Bro remembered halfway through his disgust that he’s at work,” another added.

It’s not crazy that an American would think that chicken parmesan is an Italian dish; after all, it’s served in most Italian-American restaurants. However, according to Paesana, it was created in America by the Italian diaspora.

“In the Old World, that’s Italy prior to the Italian diaspora—the large-scale emigration of Italians from Italy to America—proteins like chicken were not widely available," according to an article on the site. "As such, the prototypical chicken parmigiana was actually made with breaded, fried slices of eggplant in place of chicken for a dish called melanzane alla Parmigiana."


Even though chicken parmesan didn’t originate in the old country, Pasquale Sciarappa, a popular Italian-born food influencer living in America, has no problem cooking the dish.

"'That’s not Italian!’ I hear this every time I share a dish like Chicken Parmigiana. And you know what? They’re right — it’s not something you’d traditionally find in Italy. But you know what else is true? It’s Italian-American. It was born in immigrant kitchens — from people who left Italy, landed in the U.S., and made do with what they had. They took inspiration from dishes like melanzane alla parmigiana and recreated comfort from memory using what was available,” he wrote.

It’s understandable that an American could go to Italy without knowing that something he’d had in Italian restaurants wasn’t actually from Italy. It’s understandable for an Italian server to balk at a photo of a dish served in an American restaurant that you’d find in a shopping mall.

But we should all agree that one of the wonderful things about American culture is that it's an amalgamation of different cultures stirred around in the same pot, and if that means we get a fresh variation on the burrito, a new way to eat Chinese crab, or a tasty piece of chicken where eggplant used to be, the more the better.

Typographic mural by Jeff Canham using the first nine words of the NATO's phonetic alphabet

When you have to spell a name over the phone, you've likely had to use something akin to the NATO alphabet, even if you haven't used the exact same words. "E as in elephant, D as in David," etc. When we watch movies involving airline pilots or military personnel, we often hear the real NATO alphabet, which starts Alfa, Bravo, Charlie, Delta, and so on.

Using words to represent letters was a brilliant idea to solve the problem of trying to spell things out over early telephone wires, which often made for crackly connections where letters could easily be misunderstood. But the full history of the NATO alphabet is much more fascinating than one might guess, as BBC journalist and self-described "word nerd" Rob Watts explained in a video.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Watts explains that the 26 words of the NATO alphabet were "meticulously chosen as part of a secretive process" after WWII. The idea began with the invention of the telephone, when a version of a spelling alphabet was created within the telecom industry. Soon militaries around the world were using their own versions of such an alphabet, which resulted in the rather chaotic reality of every different branch of the armed service in Britain and the United States utilizing entirely different versions.

Clearly, a standard needed to be created, and WWII was a prime opportunity. However (and perhaps unsurprisingly), the two countries couldn't agree on what alphabet to use. Watts explains that a report for the U.S. Air Force later described the compromise that was rushed through: “The Generals and the Admirals went down the list taking first a U.S. and then a U.K. preference to complete the list and get on with the war.” What they came up with was known as the ABLE BAKER alphabet.

able baker alphabet, nato alphabet, spelling, phonetics, linguistics The ABLE BAKER alphabet was used by the U.S. and British militaries prior to the NATO alphabet.Image by Canva

So that took care of the military. But around the same time as the end of WWII, the aviation industry boomed, and in 1944, a convention resulted in 52 nations establishing an international body that would oversee non-military aviation. The International Civil Aviation Organization, or ICAO, (which still exists today) adopted the ABLE BAKER alphabet at first, but it soon became clear that that alphabet didn't work very well for the members of the ICAO who didn't speak English.

The alphabet needed words that had more universal appeal. A linguist at the University of Montreal, Professor Jean-Paul Vinay, was tasked with coming up with a new alphabet, which had to meet five criteria:

1. It had to be a live word in each of the three working languages of ICAO—English, Spanish, and French.

2. It had to be easily pronounced and recognized by airmen of all languages.

3. It needed to have good radio transmission and readability characteristics.

4. It had to have a similar spelling in at least English, French, and Spanish, and the initial letter must be the letter the word identifies.

5. It had to be free from any association with objectionable meanings.


alphabet, nato alphabet, spelling, phonetics, linguistics, ICAO alphabet Spelling alphabets are not phonetic alphabets. upload.wikimedia.org

That's how we ended up with so many Greek letters, including Alpha, which Vinay spelled ALFA to make it more phonetic. He also made Juliet more phonetic for the French by adding an extra T. A few changes were requested after Vinay submitted his alphabet, which resulted in POLKA becoming PAPA and ZEBRA becoming ZULU.

That fixed everything, right? Sure, except that most people who had to use it hated it. Many of the words were longer than the ABLE BAKER alphabet, which had many one-syllable words, whereas GOLF was the only one-syllable word in the ICAO alphabet. However, those multi-syllable words proved more effective, since a small glitch in communications would be less likely to make them unintelligible.

The new North Atlantic Treaty Organization, NATO, showed an interest in using the alphabet, so a study was done to make sure that the ALFA BRAVO alphabet really was better than ABLE BAKER. The ICAO commissioned Ohio State University to compare the two alphabets, and the result was clear: ALFA BRAVO wins. However, some additional research showed a few changes were needed, which ultimately resulted in this alphabet finalized in 1956. It's technically the ICAO alphabet but is often referred to as the NATO alphabet.

alphabet, nato alphabet, spelling, phonetics, linguistics, ICAO alphabet ICAO alphabet (also known as the NATO alphabet)IngenieroLoco/Wikimedia Commons

Pretty nifty, eh? People working together with the input of experts and support of research generally leads to helpful progress, and while the NATO alphabet may have its pain points, it's infinitely better than the haphazard way we used to tell people how to spell things clearly. Yay, humans!

You can watch Watts' entire video on his RobWords YouTube page here.

Family

Want your home to be 'the house' for your teens? Mom shares her 4 secret tricks.

There are so many benefits to being "the house" for your teens. Here's how to do it.

Amy White explains how her house became "the house" for her teens.

I grew up in "the house." In high school, my home was the designated place where my friends gathered, sometimes in big groups, sometimes just my small core squad. My three best friends spent the night there almost every Friday and/or Saturday night for four years straight. We devoured Totino's frozen pizzas by the dozens, inhaled soda, and laid waste to any snacks or leftovers that were brave enough to exist somewhere in the kitchen. Not only that, but my house was pretty small — four teenage boys took up a lot of space in the living room (the whole thing) and made a lot of noise playing video games deep into the night. It must have driven my parents and older brothers crazy. It's a wonder anyone put up with it.

Or so I thought when I was younger. When I became a parent myself, I started to understand a little more why my mom and dad were so willing to host and feed me and all my friends every single weekend. Why the outrageous grocery bill and constant chaos in the house was probably a small price to pay.

One mom has perfectly encapsulated the value of turning your home into "the house" for your kids and their friends, and exactly how she did it for her family.

parenting, teens, raising teens, teen hangout, high school, game night for teens, activities for teens, parenthood Want your house to be THE house for teens? These suggestions could help. Photo credit: Canva

Amy White shared a reel on Instagram showing her college-aged son hanging in her dining room with a group of friends playing cards. The text overlay reads "What makes your kids high school friends want to come over, play cards & spend the night on their College Christmas Break". I think most parents can agree that we want our kids to keep coming home as long as possible! So how exactly did White pull this off?

Her explanation in the caption was spot-on.

First, White says that you have to start early. Become "the hang out house" in high school or even earlier. Then you have a better chance of holding onto the mantle into your kid's college years.

Next, be ready to stock the house with snacks and drinks, and don't make a fuss when your kid's friends have at it. "The kids knew we had food," she writes, "BUT they also knew I didn't care what they had. They knew they could eat anything in my pantry and fridge."

Third, and this is a big one, don't mistake being the "cool house" for being "the house." Some parents choose to allow their underage kids and friends to drink alcohol under their supervision, but you don't have to bend your morals and the law to lure the squad over to your place. Pizza and Coke is plenty to keep most teens happy. "We were not the house that served alcohol or even allowed the kids to bring alcohol to our house. And Guess What?? The kids still came and wanted to hang at our house!"

parenting, teens, raising teens, teen hangout, high school, game night for teens, activities for teens, parenthood There's a difference between being "the cool house" and being "the house." media0.giphy.com

Fourth, always say Yes (as often as possible, anyway) when your kids want to have friends over. "They know my answer is 99% of the time YES," White writes. "You have to have your kids take the leadership of offering your home and if your home was 'open' to their friends in high school, they know it will be 'open' to their friends in college."

As a bonus tip, White pleas with parents not to worry about the mess having friends over makes. "I love a clean house and organization, BUT I would much rather have a crazy messy house for the kids where memories are made than a quiet house with nothing going on just to keep my house 'clean.'"

White writes, "It's worth being 'the house', so let go of control & get to know your kids friends." Commenters agreed.

White's video went viral to the tune of 8.5 million views and hundreds of comments. Parents shared their own experiences of what it's like being the default hang out house.

"Our house was the high school hangout for my son and friends... every weekend... I loved it!! Miss it now that they are all college graduates and have moved away. I love seeing them when they do come home for the holidays"

"A wise man once said don't be the house with the alcohol. Be the house with the food."

"Amy 1000% agree!!! My house is full of teenagers on the weekends and I love every bit of it. Even though I wake up to a kitchen that looked much different from when I left it"

parenting, teens, raising teens, teen hangout, high school, game night for teens, activities for teens, parenthood We all miss our teenage metabolism, don't we? Photo credit: Canva

"We never allowed alcohol, drugs, bad language, always respectful, and guess what, our house was always the house where the kids hung out. First my daughter, then my son. Through grade school, high school, then when my kids went out of state for college their college friends would come spend a couple weeks during the summer. I always thought of it this way, I loved knowing my kids friends and, who knows, maybe some of those kids, especially during the younger years, just maybe those kids just needed an adult to care. Anyway, it was always fun to have them here!"

"It used to crack me up when my daughter would bring over a bunch of her friends (girls and boys) in high school and instead of hanging out in the family room they all wanted to crowd into either the kitchen with me or our tiny office and happily share all the gossip with me."

Experts say that knowing your kids' friends, and their parents, can have huge benefits. Not only will it bring you the peace of mind of knowing where your kid is and who they're with when they get to those crucial high school years, it has been shown to tangibly improve kids ability to create positive relationships and problem-solve collaboratively. Plus, it can actually be really fun! Kids and teens are the funniest, silliest, most interesting people on the planet. Having a house full of them is messy and loud, but it's always a good time.

One caveat: "don’t feel bad if your house isn’t the chosen house," one commenter reminds us. "Just be happy your kid has a good group of friends and be thankful they have somewhere safe to hang out."

This article originally appeared in February