+
“A balm for the soul”
  review on Goodreads
GOOD PEOPLE Book
upworthy
Culture

Americans are shocked after learning some British people don’t rinse the soap off dishes

Some people are convinced it's all an elaborate prank.

British washing dishes; washing dishes UK; culture differences; American culture; rinsing dishes
Photo credit: Canva

Americans shocked British people don't rinse soap off dishes

Not at all to anyone's surprise, there is a difference between the way Americans do things and the way the British do things. Since platforms like TikTok have made it easy to feel like you're having face-to-face conversations with people in different parts of the word, it's no wonder that these differences can sometimes be magnified.

For a while there was a spat online because some Americans took to social media to spill their revelation of beans on toast. Of course it quickly turned into people joking about beans on toast because it's not something that is part of American culture. This set off a firestorm of back and forth commentary of British cuisine versus American cuisine with each arguing their country's food is superior.

This same thing happened when the British social media users discovered southern Americans eat biscuits and gravy, and iced tea is a standard beverage. Cultural differences can be fun to discover as long as everyone remains respectful, but this discovery probably trumps them all. Supposedly, British people don't rinse off their dishes when handwashing them and American social media users are having an entire come apart.

It's not clear where the claim originated but it quickly spread across social media as confused British people asked why Americans were confused. Someone created a skit showing two guys in the kitchen, one with a clearly British accent and one with a different accent. The British roommate was washing the dishes and skipping the rinsing before putting them in the dish rack to the dismay of the other person. People have been responding to the video confused on both sides–Americans confused about the lack of rinsing and Brits confused about the need to rinse.

person washing hand on faucet Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

Jase from the TikTok account, Jase in America made a video responding to the tags he was getting, "Okay so for some strange reason a lot of Americans have been tagging me in videos about washing dishes in the UK." The man then demonstrates how he washes the dishes which includes the usual steps, filling up the sink with water and adding dish soap. After he places a bowl in the soapy water and scrubs it with a sponge, he then simply places it still fully soapy in the dish rack.

He repeats the process with other dishes before asking if he's missing something because he doesn't understand "what's so different in America."

@jaseinamerica What’s the difference?
♬ Monkeys Spinning Monkeys - Kevin MacLeod & Kevin The Monkey

Another man from the UK that goes by the name Goonie Dad shared a video of him washing dishes and is shocked by the reaction, "this is how I wash up and this is how I've always washed up, I've never known any different and in the last 72 hours it seems like 99% of the world rise their dishes."

There's even a video from 2022 that presumably shows someone teasing about people in the UK not rinsing their dishes. But according to a couple of British creators, they rinse their dishes after soaping them up and aren't sure why some are saying they don't. Maybe it's a weirdly specific joke that British creators are pulling on Americans, either way, American creators have concerns while others joke about spices.

@gooniedad #Stitch British vs American Washing Dishes @CentralParkTurtle #WashingUp #WashingDishes #UK #Kitchen #WashingUpLiquid #Rinse #Reavtion #America #British ♬ original sound - GoonieDad

"Ok, I finally get it...the British DO use a spice........dishwashing liquid," one person exclaims.

Another flat out asks if the British are pulling Americans' legs, "Guys, are we being pranked??? Cause no way they see all those bubbles and just...ignore it."

Some commenters consulted with each other with one writing, "I was convinced this was an elaborate prank the British TikTok creators were playing on us, but if that's true then my bestie in London is in on the bit because he confirmed." An American living in England concurred, "Texan in England, can confirm I've seen quite a few Brits wash like this. I've taken over washing dishes, my husband is not allowed to wash my dishes anymore," she laughs.

@ukbirdcomedy Someone please tell ‘em #fyp #viral #weirdfacts #ukcomedy #ukmemes #britishpeoplebelike ♬ Splish Splash - Bobby Darin

A few people couldn't contain their concern, "It’s dirty, soapy, dishwater. Why wouldn’t you want to rinse off dirty water?" While another says, "guys, please rinse. you're eating soap."

Even people outside of America chimed in imploring the British creators to rinse their dishes after washing them explaining how they wash them in their own respective countries, "in Indonesia even before we use the plate, we rinse it again."

"In Greece, when we wash the dishes, we don't leave them with the soaps, we rinse them," someone shares while another concerned international commenter writes, "In România we pre rinse if it's necessary, wash it thoroughly every side, and then rinse it down, and put it to dry."

Giphy

"In Nigeria we pre rinse(rinse off particles and oil in the plate) wash with soap and rinse with clean water and continue rinsing until it’s no longer slippery, which can make us rinse 2 times," someone else writes.

Well, while a few British people have said they personally rinse their dishes, it's clear not everyone got that memo in the UK or this is the most elaborate multi-year prank ever. If that's the case that takes some serious dedication.

From Your Site Articles
british washing dishes
Education

Salesman shares the 2 phrases that will make salespeople leave you alone when shopping

"I'm just looking," doesn't work.

via Antoni Shkraba/Pexels

A salesman selling a car to a skeptical woman.

It can be intimidating to be approached by a salesperson when making a big purchase, such as a car or an appliance. They can swoop in like sharks, seeing blood in the water and some refuse to leave you alone, even if you say, “I’m just looking.”

TikTok's @RussFlipsWhips is a car salesman who went viral with a video explaining why “I’m just looking” doesn’t work on a car lot and providing more effective phrases you can use instead.

"There's two main reasons, and here's what you should say instead of 'I'm just looking,'" he said in a video with over 345,000 views. “One is, we hear it every single day. So when somebody tells me, ‘I’m just looking,’ I’m so used to hearing that, I almost like brush it off and ignore it because I’m like, ‘That’s what the customer’s supposed to say.’ “Secondly, every car salesman has had a customer say, ‘I’m just looking,’ and we ended up selling them a car."


Instead, Russell suggests you say: "Hey, I’d really like to look alone. Can I please have your business card?" or “I’m really not in the market for a car.”


@russflipswhips

Replying to @SoyPablo This is what I would say #carsales #carsalesman #cardealership #carbuyingtips

The post received funny responses from folks who may not qualify for a loan. “The ‘I have 2 repos and no money down' line works wonders,’” one TikToker joked. “I just tell them my credit score and they run,” another added.

In the end, Russell’s suggestions show that sometimes, the best way to get our point across is to be direct and honest. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to shop alone and if the salesperson can respect that request, they deserve the sale if you decide to buy something.


This article originally appeared on 7.16.24

From Your Site Articles
shopping
Women's Health

Guy shares important PSA for young women after losing sister to cervical cancer

Don’t stop until someone listens to you.

Photo credit: Canva

Guy shares PSA for woman after losing sister to cervical cancer

Cervical cancer is something that can go undetected if you're not in a position to get regular gynecological appointments. But with the new guidelines, allow for greater leeway between screenings for abnormal cervical cells. In America, the age to begin receiving pap smears, which is the test that can detect abnormal cells in the cervix, increased to age 21 and in the UK it's not given until 25.

Though, this test can detect the cells much earlier and before symptoms start, the distance between testing has been increased to every 3-5 years instead of yearly. The decrease was backed by scientific evidence showing there wasn't an increase in detection of abnormal cells by doing the test more frequently. Ethan, a man who lost his sister in 2022 to cervical cancer partly blames the delay in testing with her untimely death.

The grieving man took to TikTok to share a PSA on how important it is for women and people born with female anatomy to get their pap smears, sharing the cautionary tale of his deceased sister.

"Have you got a vagina and don't want to die? Cause if that's the case please watch this video," Ethan starts out saying. "So I'm going to tell the story of how my sister passed away and the one thing that I want anyone to take away from her death and she would want anyone to take away from hear death is to look after your health."

a woman sitting at a table with a model of a stomach Photo by Elen Sher on Unsplash

He explains that in 2021 his sister started having a lot of large blood clots "the size of a size 10 foot" that she kept going back to the doctor for but was consistently dismissed. Ethan shares that his sister began going to the hospital weekly due to the amount of pain she was in and she continued to be dismissed for months before she was referred to the gynecologist. According to the woman's brother, the process to look to see what was going on was so painful that the gynecologist refused to continue with the appointment.

"He said 'oh, I'm not doing this because you're in too much pain,' rather than actually investigating the reason why. Because she had a f***ing tumor inside her vagina that was the size of my fist. How the man missed that is beyond me. If he found that she'd probably f***ing still be alive cause she was neglected so bad throughout the whole route of this process."

baby i'm sorry GIF by truTV’s I’m SorryGiphy

Ethan reveals that she started having symptoms in October of 2021 but it wasn't until February of 2022 that she was diagnosed after months of trying to be taken seriously. Unfortunately, the cancer had already spread to her lungs, liver and stomach and died at the age of 31, March 2022.

"If you know something's wrong with you, only you know what's going on with your body so make sure you push harder. If you know that there's something wrong with you, you need to kick and scream and shout until you get what you f***ing want," he says as he shares what he hopes the main takeaway from his message will be.

Happy New Year Feminist GIF by All BetterGiphy

"Cervical cancer is so common so make sure you get your smears done because if you don't get your smears done and you've got those cells...if you've got the beginning of those cells you can just get it burned away. My mom's had it done a thousand times. My auntie's had it done. But if you leave leave them then that can lay undetected in your body for years until it's too late. Cervical cancer is a massive problem."

Ethan shares his frustration that the UK doesn't do pap smears until the age of 25 when it's the STI human papillomavirus (HPV) that causes many of the instances of cervical cancer. He's hoping that telling his sister's story will encourage people to not only get pap smears even if they have to pay for them out of pocket, but to advocate for themselves fiercely.


@eefybeefy1 Replying to @Emma Parkinson the best ones always die first ❤️ #grief #fyp #foryou #cancer #storytime ♬ original sound - Ethan

People in the comments are thankful he's speaking up while others are sharing their own stories of loss from delay in screenings along with not being believed.

"my daughter died aged 23 from cervical cancer. basically the same story as yours. neglected for 2 year, then by the time they diagnosed her she had i month to live," one mom shares.

"My friend passed away age 30 of cervical cancer, they need to lower the age of smears" another grieving person writes.

"As a GP nurse conducting smears everyday I’m SO proud of you for advocating for women, and your sister like this! It’s not a scary process to do, it’s over and done with in less than a minute and I absolutely don’t care if your legs are hairy," a nurse chimes in.

"Sadly women are often not believed when it comes to their pain. Keep educating people Ethan, your sis would be so proud of you," someone else shares.

Several women in the comments share that his video has caused them to schedule appointments for their pap smears after being overdue or afraid of going. So while his delivery may have included a few instances of adult language, his message seems to be heard clearly by those who are needing to hear it. Telling his sister's story may just save a few lives.

From Your Site Articles
cervical cancer
Family

Mom explains the common Boomer parenting style that still affects many adults today

Many are relieved to finally have a term for this experience.

Photo by Monstera Production

“What they want is dishonest harmony rather than honest conflict.”

There are certainly many things the Boomer parents generally did right when raising their kids. Teaching them the importance of manners and respect. That actions do, in fact, have consequences. That a little manners go a long way…all of these things are truly good values to instill in kids.

But—and we are speaking in broad strokes here—being able to openly discuss difficult feelings was not one of the skills passed down by this generation. And many Gen X and millennial kids can sadly attest to this.

This is why the term “dishonest harmony” is giving many folks of this age group some relief. They finally have a term to describe the lack of emotional validation they needed throughout childhood for the sake of saving face.

In a video posted to TikTok, a woman named Angela Baker begins by saying, “Fellow Gen X and millennials, let's talk about our parents and their need for dishonest harmony.”

Barker, who thankfully did not experience this phenomenon growing up, but says her husband “certainly” did, shared that when she’s tried to discuss this topic, the typical response she’d get from Boomers would be to “Stop talking about it. We don't need to hear about it. Move on. Be quiet.”

And it’s this attitude that’s at the core of dishonest harmony.

“What that’s showing is their lack of ability to handle the distress that they feel when we talk openly about uncomfortable things,” she says. “What they want is dishonest harmony rather than honest conflict.”


@parkrosepermaculture Replying to @Joe Namath #boomerparents #toxicparent #harmony #genx #millennial #badparenting #conflict #nocontact ♬ original sound - Parkrose Permaculture


“Keep quiet about these hard issues. Suppress your pain, suppress your trauma. Definitely don't talk openly about it so that you can learn to heal and break the cycle,” she continues. “What matters most is that we have the appearance of harmony, even if there's nothing harmonious under the surface.”

Barker concludes by theorizing that it was this need to promote a certain facade that created most of the toxic parenting choices of that time period.

“The desire of boomer parents to have this perception that everything was sweet and hunky dory, rather than prioritizing the needs of their kids, is what drove a lot of the toxic parenting we experienced.”

Barker’s video made others feel so seen, as clearly indicated by the comments.

“How did I not hear about dishonest harmony until now? This describes my family dynamic to a T. And if you disrespect that illusion, you are automatically labeled as the problem. It’s frustrating,” one person wrote.

“THANK YOU SO MUCH! I'm a 49 yo biker sitting in my bedroom crying right now. You just put a name to my darkness!” added another

Many shared how they were refusing to repeat the cycle.

One wrote, “This is EXACTLY my family dynamic. I’m the problem because I won’t remain quiet. Not anymore. Not again.”

“I love when my kids tell me what I did wrong. It gives me a chance to acknowledge and apologize. Everyone wants to be heard,” said another.

Of course, no parenting style is perfect. And all parents are working with the current ideals of the time, their own inner programming and their inherent need to course correct child raising problems of the previous generation. Gen Alpha parents will probably cringe at certain parenting styles currently considered in vogue. It’s all part of the process.

But hopefully one thing we have learned as a collective is that true change happens when we summon the courage to have difficult conversations.


This article originally appeared on 7.16.24

From Your Site Articles
modern families
Family

Girl dad breaks down why protecting daughters by intimidating their boyfriends needs to end

He perfectly explains why it's more important for dads to create a sense of "safety."

@professorneil/TikTok

Fear does not mean respect.

It’s understandable that fathers want to protect their daughters. But many parents today are calling out the age-old patriarchal approach of instilling fear and intimidation to do so. Even girl dads themselves.

Recently, English Professor (and father of a teen girl) Neil Shyminsky, broke down exactly what is so problematic about this trope in a stitched TikTok.

In the original clip, a father talks about meeting his 13-year-old daughter’s first boyfriend.

“I knew this was coming, but I don’t know if I’m ready for it,” the dad says, adding that he did find the boy very respectful. Both of which Shyminsky could get behind…except maybe the “insistence” that the boy address him with his last name.

But things really take a turn when the man says, “as a girl dad, it’s definitely hard knowing that the little baby you once held in your arms all of a sudden has got a boyfriend that’s starting to take your place.”

“What now? I’m truly trying to figure out how he could ‘replace’ you…but all the answers I could come up with are deeply uncomfortable,” Shyminsky says. And we’ll just leave it at that.

The dad goes onto share the “good news” that his daughter told him her boyfriend (i.e. a child) said he was “absolutely terrified” of him because of his physical build. And then the whole thing devolves into a weird message touting the importance of lifting weights, so that you won't need guns to intimidate young boys, and instead do it with hard-earned muscle.

This is where Shyminsky drops a few truth bombs.


@professorneil When they say ‘protect’, they mean ‘terrify’. #toxicmasculinity #masculinity #girldad #parenting ♬ original sound - Professor Neil


“You want a 13-year-old to be terrified of you? ... He is 13. And so any adult man would probably seem huge,” he begins, adding that while he too is generally larger than the people around him, he prefers to measure success in terms of who feels safe in his presence, versus “how many small children I terrify.”

Shyminsky goes on to say that while he wants the dating world to be as safe as possible for his daughter, prioritizing physical intimidation is the wrong way to accomplish that.

For one thing, if this young boy only respects this man’s daughter out of fear of being hurt by her father, then he “is not anyone that we want getting anywhere near our daughters” in the first place, Shyminsky points out.

And on that note, Shyminsky asks “If he’s supposed to respect and listen to you because your muscles are larger than his, how is your daughter supposed to treat him when his are in all likelihood larger than hers?”

Said that bluntly, it’s easy to see how this strategy, however well intentioned, is a form of “toxic masculinity” that, as Shyminsky put it, causes suffering to those on “the wrong end” of it. Even those who are meant to be protected by it.

Down in the comments, folks were entirely on board with Shyminsky’s hot take.

‘Fear is not respect,” one person wrote.

Another quipped, “I feel like people get their parenting techniques from 90s sitcoms.”

Parents want to protect their kids from all the many dangers of the world. But at the same time, it’s so important for kids to see firsthand how the important adults in their life lead with something other than fear, if we hope for them to do the same. This is a great example of how a mindset shift can help with that.

Shyminsky actually has an entire TikTok treasure trove of videos dissecting our ever evolving views on manhood. Including a great one breaking down how masculinity as it "should be" has been in question since 400 BCE.


@professorneil Men are never as masculine as they once were - and never have been #men #manhood #masculinity #toxicmasculinity #fragilemasculinity #greenscreenvideo #greenscreen ♬ original sound - Professor Neil

Or this one delving into misandry vs misogyny:


@professorneil #stitch with @jaystakes It’s not misandry, it’s misogyny #misogyny #misandry #sexism #feminism #feminismisforeveryone ♬ original sound - Professor Neil

You can find these, and more, on his TikTok.

From Your Site Articles
kids
Joy

Here are 29 food takes that are so controversial people think they'll be canceled for them

"People who don't like avocado should be thrown in jail."

via Carl Mikoy/Flickr, Albert Lynn /Flickr and Canva

Pizza with pineapple, a filet o' fish and candy corn.

If there’s one thing that just about everyone is passionate about, it’s food. Everyone has their own unique palate and if they don’t think something tastes good, it’s impossible to convince them otherwise. People also have strong preferences over where they like to eat. Are they a Taco Bell or Del Taco person? Denny’s or Waffle House? Starbucks or Dunkin’?

People also have a sense of mortality about what they eat. Some are omnivores, others are Vegans. Some feel it’s wrong to eat food unless it died or fell off the tree naturally, while others are willing to eat fish that are still alive.

That’s why a recent post by Araaa, also known as @Shawntifying on X, was so fun. She asked people to share their most “cancellable food take,” and people gave some extremely passionate opinions on food. The X thread was extremely popular, receiving over 42 million views.


Here are some of the most “cancellable” food opinions to get your blood pumping and mouth-watering.



Some people jumped into the thread to take shots at other people’s tastes and habits.


Do people like pineapple on pizza?

Many people showed up to defend their love for pineapple on pizza. That’s been a heated debate on social media over the past few years. So, what do most people think about pineapple on pizza? A recent YouGov poll found that most people are fans. A poll of over 1,000 people found that 22% love it and 37% like it. That means 59% or more than half of those polled like pineapple on pizza. On the other side of the debate, 18% dislike it and 19% hate pineapple on pizza.



Some people were passionate about the first meal of the day.



Strangely, many people shared their thoughts on candy corn. The polls show that people either love the Halloween treat or think it’s an abomination. Food flavor specialist Marie Wright tells Today that our opinion of the candy is closely tied to our experiences with it as children.

"The area of the brain where we process smell (which has a major impact on how we process taste) … is in the same part of the brain where we store memories and evoke emotion," said Wright. "In that primitive part of the brain, often there is a strong connection between an event, especially when it's food, especially childhood."



Sweet potatoes were also controversial, with people swearing by them or wanting them eradicated from the planet.



There were also some extremely hot takes about fast food restaurants.



Many people don’t like shellfish, which will save them thousands of dollars over a lifetime.



Not everyone finds coffee delicious.



The bone-in versus boneless-wing debate was also a big issue among the people in the thread.



And, of course, some people in the thread were just 100% wrong.


From Your Site Articles
food
Trending Stories