This woman wants to know where all the 'middle class moms' have gone this Christmas
What's with all the "immaculate houses" and "$500 Target hauls", she wonders.
Bri argues that the extravagant Christmas decor she sees online doesn't reflect her reality.
Generally speaking, folks are feeling…shall we say…financially cautious this year when it comes to holiday spending. According to USA Today, a combination of inflation, dwindling savings and rising debt has caused many Americans to focus only on the essentials when it comes to their Christmas celebrations.
However, social media tells a different story. A five second scroll through TikTok will make you think that every home in the world (besides yours, of course) is prepped for the holiday issue of Architectural Digest. Spotless, all white furnishings, giant decorations that would put department stores to shame, luxury brand snacks left out for delivery drivers…you get the picture.
And sure, while watching aspirational videos online might provide a fun temporary escape, many are feeling like the novelty has worn off.
Take Bri, for example. Bri is wondering where all the moms like her have gone on social media. The moms who, as she describes it, “ are wearing a sweater from 2016?” The moms whose nicer things they own “were gifted to them at some point in their lives, who the newest part of their Christmas decor every year is the Christmas tree.”
These moms are certainly not on Bri’s social media. Instead, she gets a barrage of “massive, massive hauls of new Christmas decor with you know mom in like this brand new outfit, babies dressed to the nines, house is immaculate and massive. Cars brand new.”
Meanwhile, while filming her own video, Bri sits in her 2015 car with over a hundred thousand miles on it. She will not be, as she wrote in her caption, showcasing “$500 Target hals” because instead, she’ll be saving to replace said 2015 car, as well as paying off student loans, and you know, buying groceries to live.
Bottom line: most of what Bri sees online she simply cannot relate to, and she suspects the same is true for many others.
@bridineen There will be no $500 Target hauls of Christmas decor happening here bc we have student loans to pay, a new car to save for and groceries to buy. But if you are looking for some middle class mom content, here I am! My home is not completely renovated, our cars are old and anything new that I buy is for my babies 😅 Ib: @evelyn | real mom life 🫶🏼 #middleclassmum#middleclassfamily#middleclassmom #middleclasslife ♬ Holly Jolly Christmas (Sped Up) - Michael Bublé & Sped Up Songs + Nightcore
“I do not relate to the over the top extravagant lifestyles with a mortgage to kids, student loans up the wazoo and the price of groceries. Like that's just not my life and it probably never will be and that's okay,” she says, adding “I don't think that's the reality for a majority of us honestly, for real. Like in this economy, absolutely not.”
Turns out, Bri is definitely not the only middle class mom feeling this way. Thousands showed up in her comments section to show solidarity.
“The only new christmas stuff I bought this year was WRAPPING PAPER,” one revealed.
Another admitted “None of my decor ‘matches’. It’s just a hodgepodge of thrift and craft sale finds. My kids won’t remember if the decor matched, so who cares.”
Others shared situations that were almost exactly like Bri’s—proving that many are in the same boat.
One person commented, “Here here here!! One income and one car family drowning in student debt in a rental townhouse 😅😅 fighting that overconsumption temptation errday”
Another echoed,“Hi! 👋🏻 we are here! Old clothes, tired, overwhelmed, dirty house, and 2015 car here with 155,000 miles lol - you are not alone!”
One person even astutely pointed out that maybe most regular moms are simply too drained making everything happen and running on fumes to post content, writing “We’re in the majority but too tired/busy to be posting all the time. You’re doing great ❤️.” To which Bri replied, “tired. So tired.”
All this to say, if you’re struggling with feeling like your holiday celebrations somehow don’t measure up, remember that what’s carefully curated online is in no way an accurate reflection of what most people experience. Most of us are simply trying to exist, using what we’ve got, and very, very tired. Don’t let any perceived shortcomings rob you of the inherent joys that come with the season—gratitude, time with loved ones, and maybe, just maybe…a nap.
- Mom lives the dream: quietly quitting household chores to see if her family notices ›
- Woman's rant to have less mom influencers on social media is so spot on ›
- 'Broke mom' gives the 'holiday gift guide' that everyone struggling needs to hear ›
- How much income is considered 'middle class' in America? - Upworthy ›
Beaver in water. Photo by 
An actual beaver dam on the now-thriving Price River
Not just coworkers—family, friends, strangers, kids…
Imagine having to go so badly but being out of euros. 
Anything hobbit-esque can't be wrong. 
But what if you need pain meds AND mascara?!
Imagine how this would affect childcare.
Honestly…where's the lie?
A brown buddha statue sits near a green mountain. Photo by 
Urgent dash to the bathroom! 🚪🏃♂️
Ladybug unexpectedly found during colonoscopyPhoto credit: 
Close-up of bottom of ladybug found in colonPhoto credit: 
There's a reason why some people can perfectly copy accents, and others can't
Turns out, there's a neurodivergent link.
A woman in black long sleeve shirt stands in front of mirror.
Have you ever had that friend who goes on vacation for four days to London and comes back with a full-on Queen's English posh accent? "Oooh I left my brolly in the loo," they say, and you respond, "But you're from Colorado!" Well, there are reasons they (and many of us) do that, and usually it's on a pretty subconscious level.
It's called "accent mirroring," and it's actually quite common with people who are neurodivergent, particularly those with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). According Neurolaunch, the self-described "Free Mental Health Library," "Accent mirroring, also known as accent adaptation or phonetic convergence, is the tendency to unconsciously adopt the accent or speech patterns of those around us. This linguistic chameleon effect is not unique to individuals with ADHD, but it appears to be more pronounced and frequent in this population."
Essentially, when people have conversations, we're constantly "scanning" for information—not just the words we're absorbing, but the inflection and tone. "When we hear an accent, our brains automatically analyze and categorize the phonetic features, prosody, and intonation patterns," writes Neurolaunch. For most, this does result in copying the accent of the person with whom we're speaking. But those with ADHD might be more sensitive to auditory cues. This, "coupled with a reduced ability to filter out or inhibit the impulse to mimic…could potentially explain the increased tendency for accent mirroring."
While the article explains further research is needed, they distinctly state that, "Accent mirroring in individuals with ADHD often manifests as an unconscious mimicry of accents in social situations. This can range from subtle shifts in pronunciation to more noticeable changes in intonation and speech rhythm. For example, a person with ADHD might find themselves unconsciously adopting a Southern drawl when conversing with someone from Texas, even if they’ve never lived in the South themselves."
People are having their say online. On the subreddit r/ADHDWomen, a thread began: "Taking on accents is an ADHD thing?" The OP shares, "My whole life, I've picked up accents. I, myself, never noticed, but everyone around me would be like, 'Why are you talking like that??' It could be after I watched a show or movie with an accent or after I've traveled somewhere with a different accent than my 'normal.'
They continue, "Apparently, I pick it up fast, but it fades out slowly. Today... I'm scrolling Instagram, I watch a reel from a comedian couple (Darcy and Jeremy. IYKYK) about how Darcy (ADHD) picks up accents everywhere they go. It's called ADHD Mirroring??? And it's another way of masking."
(The OP is referring to Darcy Michaels and his husband Jeremy Baer, who are both touring comedians based in Canada.)
Hundreds of people on the Reddit thread alone seem to relate. One comments, "Omfg I've done this my whole life; I'll even pick up on the pauses/spaces when I'm talking to someone who is ESL—but English is my first language lol."
Sometimes, it can be a real issue for those around the chameleon. "I accidentally mimicked a waitress's weird laugh one time. As soon as she was out of earshot, my family started to reprimand me, but I was already like 'oh my god I don’t know why I did that, I feel so bad.'"
Many commenters on TikTok were shocked to find out this can be a sign of ADHD. One jokes, "Omg, yes, at a store the cashier was talking to me and she was French. She's like 'Oh are you French too? No, I'm not lol. I'm very east coast Canada."
And some people just embrace it and make it work for them. "I mirror their words or phrase! I’m 30. I realized I start calling everyone sweetie cause my manager does & I work at coffee shop."