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Michael Ian Black makes some great points about how we raise boys.

There's nothing wrong with healthy masculinity, but there's a toxic variety as well.

"Boys are broken," wrote comedian Michael Ian Black on Feb. 14th.

Just hours earlier, a gunman shot and killed 17 students and teachers at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida. The tragedy led Black to get a bit introspective about his gender and speculate the role society's more toxic messages play in these much-too-frequent massacres.

"Until we fix men, we need to fix the gun problem," he wrote on Twitter. "The last 50 years redefined womanhood: Women were taught they can be anything. No commensurate movement for men who are still generally locked into the same rigid, outdated model of masculinity and it's killing us."

A week later, The New York Times published an op-ed by Black tackling the issue in more detail.

"Too many boys are trapped in the same suffocating, outdated model of masculinity, where manhood is measured in strength, where there is no way to be vulnerable without being emasculated, where manliness is about having power over others," Black wrote. "They are trapped, and they don’t even have the language to talk about how they feel about being trapped, because the language that exists to discuss the full range of human emotion is still viewed as sensitive and feminine."

The point he was making was that we aren't doing enough as a society to encourage and support boys and men emotionally. He's right — and there's data to back him up.

On March 7, LGBTQ student organization GLSEN shared some interesting findings related to Black's argument. It's the same point that's been made a number of times before by writers like Bryan Epps, Lauren Sandler, and Jennifer Wright: Society's outdated vision of masculinity can be harmful.

The argument is not "anti-men" or "anti-boys," but a plea to provide the necessary support to sidestep toxic masculinity.

According to GLSEN, a study of the 31 mass school shootings between 1995 and 2015 found that "each shooter was male and all experienced challenges to their performance of masculinity, through homophobia and other forms of gender policing," to which they responded by trying to "prove their tormentors wrong."

Disturbingly, it looks as though teachers are actually getting less involved in trying to protect their students from bullying.

Creating an environment where bullies thrive unchecked is bad for all students. When that bullying centers on how boys express their masculinity, it simply results in more bullies and, occasionally, violence.

The way we talk to and about boys fosters unhealthy personal expectations, leaving many to feel isolated, alone, and afraid to seek help when they need it.

"Globally, boys are allowed far less space than girls to act outside the norms forced upon them," GLSEN tweeted.

Of course, as the group notes, "most boys experience some gender policing and don't commit acts of mass violence like in Parkland." It's not meant to be an excuse for atrocities, but maybe a bit of an explanation.

There's nothing wrong with being a man, but maybe we do need to rethink what it means to be one.

"Our society's typical notion of what it means to be a man might keep boys from reaching out or accepting help," GLSEN tweeted, continuing:

"It may also lead them to assert masculinity via weapons that are often exalted as symbols and tools of masculine strength and power. ... There is no one cause of mass school shootings. Nor should there be one response. Yet, for the wellbeing of young people of all genders, it's crucial for EVERYONE (in schools and elsewhere) to expand our ideas of what being a man can and should be."

"We know ourselves to be men, but don't know how to be our whole selves," Black tweeted.

The last two tweets from his thread tell the whole story — the fragility, the fear, the need for help. Having these tough, honest conversations, however, are a great place to start changing the world for the better, for children of all genders, not just boys.

"We’re terrified of being viewed as something other than men. We know ourselves to be men, but don’t know how to be our whole selves. A lot of us (me included) either shut off or experience deep shame or rage. Or all three. Again: Men are terrified," Black wrote. "Even talking about this topic invites ridicule because it’s so scary for most men (and women). Men are adrift and nobody is talking about it and nobody’s doing anything about it and it’s killing us."

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People from around the globe share 15 signs that someone is obviously an American

"An Italian told me that Americans walk confidently in the wrong direction."

tourists, american tourists, us tourists, vacation, american style
via Tarnie/Flickr, Paul Duncan/Flickr, tAlex Bikes/Flickr

Americans on vacation.

One of the fun things about traveling to different countries is that you not only get to learn about other cultures, but you also learn some things about your own. Americans who travel abroad often learn that people around the world appreciate them for being open, friendly, and good at spreading hope and optimism.

On the other hand, people in other countries can often tell when an American is coming from a mile away because they speak loudly, whether indoors or outdoors. Americans also have a very peculiar body language and are known to lean on things when they have to stand for an extended period.


A Reddit user posed a question in the AskReddit subforum to learn more about how Americans stand out abroad: What's an "obvious" sign that someone is American? The post received more than 35,000 responses, with an overwhelming number of commenters noting that Americans are all smiles and love to make small talk, something most people appreciate.

According to Redditors, here are 15 "obvious" signs that someone is American:

1. They have a unique confidence

"An Italian told me that Americans walk confidently in the wrong direction."

"Been taught to walk fast, and look worried.. People think you know what you're doing."

2. They're friendly

"I worked as a cashier in a tourist place in Paris, I always recognised Americans because they were kinda friendly to me and they always left tips."

"I guess there are worse things than friendly and generous."


3. Time = distance

"If someone asks how far away something is, an American will tell how you long it takes to get there as opposed to a physical distance."

"It actually pisses off some Americans to give a distance in miles, unless they're calculating gas mileage. In some places, you have to give with and without traffic options. I think it's more valuable info in time than in distance."

4. Grinning at strangers

"The gentle grins you give to strangers if you make eye contact with them as you pass by, at least in the Midwest. was not well received in Germany."

"I dated a European man here in the US. When we walked together, every time I made eye contact with someone on our path I would smile at them, and they would always smile back. Boyfriend was so confused at all these strangers smiling at me. Kept asking if I knew all these people. It was hilarious."


5. They like personal space

"How much personal space they give themselves. Americans like at LEAST an arm's length."

"We're conditioned to fill spaces evenly. I noticed when i worked delivery, spending lots of quality time on elevators that for every new person that enters, everybody shuffles to even things out. Similar thing plays out in social gatherings and bars. Not sure if that's universal or not, but I find it interesting. I think the size of our personal bubbles is because our spaces are generally much larger because we've got the space (heh) to build bigger buildings, sidewalks, roads etc. Might also explain why we're louder. Used to filling larger spaces with volume."

Body language expert Joe Navarro says that among Americans, the social zone for acquaintances and casual interactions is four to 12 feet, while family and close friends stand 1.5 to four feet apart. The intimate zone, for those closest to us, ranges from the skin to about 18 inches.


6. They lean

"According to the CIA, when training to be a spy, you have to unlearn how to lean. Americans tend to lean on things when standing still."

All of this is true, according to Jonna Mendez, the former chief of disguise at the CIA, who has shared some of her tips and tricks for making Americans seem more European. "So we would de-Americanize you," Mendez told NPR. "They think that we are slouchy, a little sloppy. And they think that they can almost see that in our demeanor on the street because they stand up straight. They don't lean on things."


7. They don't have an indoor voice

"I've lived in America for 25 years, and it still irritates me that instead of lowering their voices in restaurants so everyone can hear, Americans just scream over each other and make their restaurants as loud as clubs."

"For some reason, my otherwise smart and wonderful American friends will speak in the same volume, diction, and speed regardless of any outside factor unless specifically asked."

8. Dessert for breakfast

"In my homestay in London, I was told that I was 'so American' for enjoying a piece of cake for breakfast (not frosted cake, but like a nuts and dried fruit spiced coffeecake kind of thing). Apparently, that's exclusively for like a 4 pm snack, and breakfast is more of a savory meal."

"A lot of American breakfast items in my mind are desserts (pancakes, muffins, waffles, etc.). It doesn't mean I won't eat them, but it's kinda weird to do so."

9. They wear their clothes differently

"A British man once told me he knew I was American because I was wearing a baseball cap backwards."

"An Italian told me they could tell I was American because I wore my sunglasses on the top of my head when I wasn't using them."


10. Exposed soles

"While visiting Turkey, I was told that I looked American because I was sitting with one leg across the other, and the bottom of my shoe was exposed. Apparently, it's rude idk."

"In a lot of places outside of the US, showing the bottom of your shoe is rude."

11. Tactical gear

"Tactical sunglasses."

"I'm in the US, and virtually anything marketed towards men has the word 'tactical' in front of it."

12. They love small talk

"I'm from California (though a smallish town), and we wave to neighbors on our road, even if we haven't met, and start conversations in the grocery line with people if the opportunity presents itself. Also, smiling and saying hello to someone you happen to walk by and make eye contact with is quite normal. We are a social species, it would be so weird not to be friendly, even to strangers, for me, and I'm not even that social of a person."

"What really gets me to it is not that Americans do small talk constantly, but the fact that they are so good and fast at it. I mean, I say 'yeah, it's hot,' and they reply with some interesting fact or make a connection to their hometown. I feel less of myself after this. They must have some small talk class in school or some sh*t."

13. They like to point

"I've always observed my US friends like to point at stuff while walking and say what it is…. We were out walking around Amsterdam recently and they were like 'hey look it's a smoke shop'…. 'Oh look a sex shop'…. 'Oh hey, it's a prostitute' …. 'Look at the canal'…. 'Wow it's another prostitute'….. 'another canal' etc etc. It was like watching Netflix with Audio Descriptions turned on."

"You know that little voice inside your head, your internal monologue? Americans seem to monologue their thoughts."


14. Optimism and enthusiasm

"Dunno in all context, but Americans in Europe stand out with their ceaseless optimism and enthusiasm."

"I'm reminded a lot of Ted Lasso. Everyone I know (all Americans) loves the show. I wonder what kind of European fan base it has."

"Americans are so positive and have such a thirst for life. It sickens me."

15. They eat while walking

"When I lived in Europe, people said only Americans eat while walking. I'd be eating a bagel or something on the way to work or class, and multiple people asked if I was American lol."

"Jay Leno said on Top Gear, I think it was, that Americans are also the only people who eat while driving. I don't do this, but I constantly see people who do, haha, especially in LA, where people spend a lot of time in their cars."

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Research definitely claims going to bed exactly at 10pm is the ideal for better sleep

"Most people wake up feeling refreshed."

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Photo credit: Canva

The time of night you should go to bed for the best sleep, according to science.

Getting a full night of deep, restful sleep is a struggle. From waking up in the middle of the night to having trouble falling asleep, figuring out the perfect nighttime routine to lull you into sleep is crucial to wake up fully rested. One element that may be throwing off your sleep schedule is what time you go to bed. According to Apple Watch data published in the Apple Heart and Movement Study from 2025 (via Axios), the average American bedtime is 11:37 p.m.

But when is the best time to go to bed for optimal sleep? According to science, 10 p.m.

Researchers in the United Kingdom found that study participants who consistently went to bed at 10 p.m. reported the lowest risk of cardiovascular disease. Those who went to bed between 10:00 p.m. and 10:59 p.m. reported lower incidence than those who went to bed between 11:00 p.m.–11:59 p.m., and after 12:00 a.m.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Dr. Emma Lin, a board-certified pulmonologist and sleep medicine specialist and the co-founder of AimVein, tells Upworthy that the body starts preparing you for sleep even earlier.

"Around 9 to 10 p.m., the production of melatonin begins in the brain. This is the hormone that gives your body the signal that it is time to go to sleep," she says. "The body temperature drops. The heart beats slower. The breathing becomes rhythmic."

By then, the body is perfectly prepped for a good night of sleep.

"When people go to bed at 10 p.m., they sleep better and faster. Their bodies breathe better," says Dr. Lin. "Most people wake up feeling refreshed. Going to bed at this time corresponds to the body’s natural rhythm."

sleep, deep sleep, good sleep, better sleep, bedtime Woman wearing a sleeping mask asleep in bed by 10 p.m.Photo credit: Canva

Of course, going to bed at 10 p.m. may be way too late or totally unrealistic for some people. In that case, Dr. Lin stresses that what's most important is going to bed at the same time every night.

"Your body loves the same routine every day. This is what I always tell my patients. The brain works like a clock. If the clock doesn’t go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, it will be confused," she explains. "But if the clock goes to bed at the same time every day, it will know when it’s time to slow down. The melatonin will be released on schedule. The breathing will calm down. Patients with insomnia and sleep apnea will see an improvement in their sleep pattern just by having the same bed time every day."

The goal is to sleep 7–9 hours each night, which is recommended by the National Sleep Foundation. Dr. Lin adds that this amount of sleep allows the body and brain to recover completely.

sleep, phone use at night, on phone in bed, bedtime, phone use before bed Woman struggles to sleep on her phone.Photo credit: Canva

"Sleeping is cyclical. Some phases are good for the immune system. Others are good for memory. Deep phases are good for allowing the lungs and heart to rest, she says. "When people get less than 7 hours’ sleep, I see increased daytime sleepiness, increased levels of stress hormones in the body, and increased breathing difficulties in people with breathing problems like asthma or lung disease when they get inadequate sleep. Adequate sleep allows the body to heal itself."

So, if you are looking to go to bed at 10 p.m. (or a time that will be consistent for you to hit the 7-9 hours), Dr. Lin suggests you avoid these two things to get good sleep: "Exposure to bright light can turn the brain’s internal clock back. Using electronic devices at night suppresses melatonin," she says. "And drinking alcohol can exacerbate breathing problems at night. I tell all my patients that sleep is not a lazy activity. Sleep is a healing activity."

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Kansas police pulled over an '80s pop icon for speeding and it turned into a hilarious photo shoot

"It's not every day our Deputies get to pull over cool guys!!"

john waite, police, cops, rock stars, musicians
Photo credit: Kiowa County Sheriff’s Office via Facebook, cropped

Kansas police pulled over an '80s pop star, and it led to a wholesome moment.

Being pulled over by the police is always nerve-racking, and it's probably even more awkward when the driver is a pop star with multiple chart-topping singles. In July 2025, one such encounter went viral after sheriff's deputies in Kiowa County, Kansas, stopped a vehicle transporting British '80s hitmaker John Waite. But instead of leading to tension, the traffic stop resulted in a genuinely wholesome moment.

Waite and his band were en route to their concert at United Wireless Arena in Dodge City when they were pulled over for speeding. Sergeant Justin Rugg just happened to be a longtime fan. "I'm not even on cloud nine; I'm on like cloud 12," he said after making the stop, according to the Kiowa County Sheriff Office's Facebook page. The post continued: "It's not every day our Deputies get to pull over cool guys!!"

Everyone was a good sport about the whole thing. Waite took a photo with the officer and even had his band pose for another, leaning over the hood of the patrol car and looking back at the camera in mock confusion. The band eventually made it to the show, and both Waite and the sheriff's office shared the photos. The KCSO wrote to Waite, "Have a rockin' time and check out that beautiful Kansas sky!" On his own account, the musician added, "Pulled over for speeding. Good guy cop!"

- YouTube www.youtube.com

"The next thing I know, I'm taking photographs with him, and we're almost wrestling"

Neither the report nor the social media posts officially say whether Waite's crew received a speeding ticket, but given the cordial tone of the photo session, it seems likely they were let off with a warning.

The comment sections are full of solid jokes and observations, including this one: "Excuse was he didn't want to be late for a show. He got off with a verbal. I'm going to have to try that next time." A commenter whose profile lists their occupation as a 911 dispatcher with the Kiowa County Sheriff's Office wrote: "I was just excited to dispatch on this call lol!! Freaking AMAZING!!!!! Hey, John Waite, stop in here on your way back!! It's my weekend to work so I didn't get to see you!!!!"

Months later, Waite laughed about the viral encounter during an interview with the YouTube channel AccordingToAmabile.

"[The officer] says, 'Who are you?'" he recalled. "I'm going, 'John Waite.' He says, 'John Waite!' And the next thing I know, I'm taking photographs with him, and we're almost wrestling. Everybody's cracking up and laughing. He was a great guy! That night, I look out in the audience, and he's raging, jumping up and down about four rows back! You meet some fantastic people [as a musician]. You really do. And a lot of it's very funny."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

You've probably heard Waite's '80s hits

While many people admitted they don't recognize the singer's name, it's likely they've heard at least a few of his songs.

Waite's first prominent gig came in the late '70s as the frontman and bassist of the hard rock–power pop band The Babys, best known for minor hits like "Isn't It Time" and "Every Time I Think of You." The group, which briefly included Journey keyboardist Jonathan Cain, broke up in 1981, and Waite launched a solo career the following year with his debut LP, Ignition. He enjoyed a long run of commercial success in the decade, landing 10 singles on the Billboard Hot 100, including his ultra-smooth 1984 No. 1 hit "Missing You." (If you haven't seen the music video, do yourself a favor. It's 1984 in visual form. Classic stuff.)

In between his various solo projects and tours, Waite had another breakthrough moment. In 1988, he co-founded the supergroup Bad English, which scored a No. 1 hit the following year with the sleek ballad "When I See You Smile." No wonder Sergeant Rugg was so impressed.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

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Man uses Anne Hathaway clip to explain 'bridge back' method to regain control of a conversation

All it takes is 3 simple steps.

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Photo Credit: Canva, Wiki Commons

A beautiful bridge. Anne Hathaway.

Have you ever found that you've lost control of a conversation? Perhaps you're making a point about something when it's derailed by a topic you'd rather not discuss. Rather than get frustrated, there's a super simple technique one can use to get back on track. It's called the "bridge back" method, and once you understand how it's done, it can be an incredibly useful tool in conversation.

The "bridge back" method is often exemplified in interviews. Rob D. Willis, a strategic story producer, shared an interview on his Instagram that Matt Lauer conducted with Anne Hathaway during her Les Misérables press junket tour. In this re-surfaced clip making the rounds online, Lauer brings up a "wardrobe malfunction" and asks her what "lessons she learned."

First, Hathaway acknowledges that it happened. She then explains how it made her feel. "It kind of made me sad on two accounts. One, I was very sad that we live in an age when someone takes a picture of another person in a vulnerable moment rather than delete it. And I'm sorry that we live in a culture that commodifies sexuality of unwilling participants, which brings us back to Les Mis because that's what my character is." (Hathaway played Fantine, a sex worker in France in the 1800s.)

Willis pauses the clip here and points out that this is a classic "trap question" that a celebrity often gets. "The journalist wants an embarrassing story, but the actor wants to talk about what they're working on." He praises Hathaway's bridge back technique and says "it's perfect for difficult questions."

He breaks down how she does it:

Step 1: Briefly acknowledge

“It was obviously an unfortunate incident”

She owns it without dwelling on it or getting emotional.

Step 2: Connect to the bigger picture

“It kind of made me sad on two accounts. One was that I was very sad that we live in an age when someone takes a picture of another person in a vulnerable moment and rather than delete it... And I’m sorry that we live in a culture that commodifies sexuality of unwilling participants.”

She moves the frame from her personal mistake to a cultural critique.

Step 3: Return to your point

“Which brings us back to Les Mis — because that’s what my character is”

Anne Hathaway appears on TheToday Show to discuss Les Misérables www.youtube.com, Kingsherry, The Today show

On Vocate, a site dedicated to building communication and public speaking skills, they note, “Good bridging isn’t about avoidance. It’s about reframing. A skillful speaker acknowledges the legitimacy of the question but still takes the opportunity to express what truly matters to them and their audience.”

They add that the method is also often seen with skilled politicians, writing, “Used well, it creates space for clarity, narrative control, and audience connection.” For a slightly easier way to memorize the tip, they call it the "ABC method"—“Acknowledge, Bridge, Communicate.”

On the Cornerstone Coaching and Training site, human resources consultant Betty Lochner goes over similar ideas and stresses the importance of staying in control without getting aggressive or defensive. “Learning how to bridge conversations is learning how to move someone from where they want the conversation to be to where you want it to go.”

Nadhi Saini gives examples on how to use bridging in conversations. www.youtube.com, Nidhi Saini

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Scientists found the perfect temperature for baking cookies. It could be surprisingly important.

The results could lead to far greater things than just yummier cookies.

baking, bakery, cookies, bread, dough, desserts, food, food science, food technology, food waste, conservation, sustainability
Photo credit: Canva

Scientists conducted a comprehensive test on cookie-baking temperatures and discovered a surprising result.

If you Google "chocolate chip cookie recipe," you'll find millions of different recipes and methods for making them at home. All feature slight variations that make them unique. Baking temperature, for example, is one detail many bakers disagree on. Top results recommend baking cookies at 375, 350, or even, in some cases, 325 degrees Fahrenheit. Many of them claim to be the "absolute best" chocolate chip cookie recipe.

Science may have something to say about that, thanks to some delectable new research.

A team of food scientists and researchers from the University of Guelph recently conducted a rigorous examination of the effects of baking temperature on cookies.

In a paper fittingly titled "Morphological changes and color development during cookie baking—Kinetic, heat, and mass transfer considerations," published in the Journal of Food Science, a team led by Maria Corradini presented an impressively detailed study.

The researchers set out to methodically track what happens to cookies during baking. How does color change over time? How do shape, size, moisture level, and thickness evolve at different points in the process? And, crucially, how do all of those factors shift when different baking temperatures are applied?

It's safe to say this may be the most comprehensive scientific examination of desserts ever conducted.

baking, bakery, cookies, bread, dough, desserts, food, food science, food technology, food waste, conservation, sustainability The most delicious experiment ever.Photo credit: Canva

The paper explains what the researchers were looking to uncover and why it matters:

"During baking, several physical and physicochemical changes occur, such as shape expansion/contraction, color development, and the generation of desired flavor compounds. Studying the physical and physicochemical properties of baked goods and the influence of heat and mass transfer on them can provide valuable information to the cereal sector to improve and optimize the baking process, control the quality and safety characteristics of products, and guarantee appropriate handling of this product."

Though the study focused specifically on cookies, many of the findings could also apply to other baked goods, such as bread, crackers, and granola bars, which make up a sizable portion of the average person's diet.

The researchers found that, not surprisingly, temperature had a big impact on how the cookies turned out.

Cookies baked at the highest temperatures set quickly in the oven and ended up the driest after the 12-minute bake. Cookies baked at the lowest temperatures retained the most moisture but tended to spread more and develop less ideal shape and structure.

While everyone has their own preferences for gooey and doughy cookies or crisp and crunchy ones, the team did find one specific temperature that really hit the spot. Food & Wine summed it up this way:

"Within the lab conditions of the study, 205°C (just over 400 F) struck a middle ground — hot enough to promote structure and doneness without excessive drying. That balance may help explain why many experienced bakers gravitate toward slightly higher oven temperatures than individual recipes typically call for."

Veteran bakers across social media have plenty of opinions about the ideal temperature for baking cookies, with many advocating for the higher end of what most recipes suggest. Cookies baked at around 375 degrees Fahrenheit often develop a lightly crisp exterior with an extremely moist center. In the lab, researchers baked each batch for 12 minutes. In a home kitchen, however, baking "until done" at lower temperatures typically requires more time and may actually result in a drier cookie overall.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

What's particularly fascinating about the study is what its findings could mean for future baking research.

In the conclusion of the paper, the authors write, "This study serves as an initial and fundamental step for developing a future comprehensive model that can be used to simulate the baking process for producing cookies with better quality and safety."

Now that the baking process has been modeled in such extreme detail, researchers are one step closer to "virtual cookies," Corradini told the Institute of Food Technologists. She added that, one day, companies may be able to experiment virtually with different recipes and baking methods without wasting food ingredients or energy.

The research could also lead to more efficient food production processes. Corradini has partnered with a team at the University of Foggia in Italy, "who used a very high-resolution biomedical 3D printer to produce biscuit prototypes. They found that they could design a biscuit that needed much less time baking, thereby saving energy."

baking, bakery, cookies, bread, dough, desserts, food, food science, food technology, food waste, conservation, sustainability The findings are of particular interest to commercial bakeries that spend billions on energy. Photo by Juno Jo on Unsplash

Commercial bakeries in the United States spend close to a billion dollars on energy each year, so they're constantly looking for ways to make the process more efficient. One study found, for example, that cutting bread-baking time by 20% did not reduce quality or safety.

Studies like this could help lower those costs, potentially making baked goods more affordable and accessible. And even if they don't, they might inspire us amateur bakers to try a slightly more aggressive baking approach at home on our next batch of snickerdoodles.

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