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Video explains why it's so hard for the average guy to find love on dating apps

Men, the odds are not in your favor.

dating apps, men on dating apps, memeable data

via Memeable Data/YouTube

The difference between men and women on dating apps is significant.

Dating apps are challenging for the average guy because they can be a big blow to their self-esteem. They can contribute to feelings of anxiety and depression because of the heightened competition on the apps and the pressure to present a perfect image.

A study out of the University of North Texas found that male Tinder users reported lower levels of satisfaction with their faces and bodies and lower levels of self-worth than those who aren't on the dating app.

A big reason is that it’s a lot harder for straight men to find matches on dating apps than straight women. An eye-opening video created by Memeable Data clearly shows why dating apps can be so frustrating for the average guy.

In the video, the narrator explains there are three significant reasons dating apps are so challenging for most men. Although he doesn’t have all the data necessary to make precise claims, the numbers are aligned with those reported by Hinge.

Reason 1: There are more male than female users. On most sites, men outnumber women 2-to-1.

Reason 2: Men give more likes than women. Men are nearly three times as likely to swipe a profile "like" (46%) than women (14%).

Reason 3: A small share of the users get a big percentage of the likes. About half the likes from men are given to about 25% of the women, and half the likes from women are given to only 15% of the men.

This means that out of 100 swipes per user, the average man only gets one like and zero matches.

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Our favorite giveaway is back. Enter to win a free, fun date! 🌊 💗

It's super easy, no purchase or donation necessary, and you help our oceans! That's what we call a win-win-win. Enter here.

Our favorite giveaway is back. Enter to win a free, fun date! 🌊 💗

True

Our love for the ocean runs deep. Does yours? Enter here!

This Valentine’s Day, we're bringing back our favorite giveaway with Ocean Wise. You have the chance to win the ultimate ocean-friendly date. Our recommendation? Celebrate love for all your people this Valentine's Day! Treat your mom friends to a relaxing spa trip, take your best friend to an incredible concert, or enjoy a beach adventure with your sibling! Whether you're savoring a romantic seafood dinner or enjoying a movie night in, your next date could be on us!

Here’s how to enter:

Go to upworthy.com/oceandate and complete the quick form for a chance to win - it’s as easy as that.
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Here are the incredible dates:

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Special thanks to our friends at All In who are all in on helping moms!

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Grab your favorite person and get some much-needed ocean time. Did you know research on “blue spaces” suggests that being near water is linked with better mental health and well-being, including feeling calmer and less stressed? We’ll treat you to a beach adventure like a surfing or sailing class, plus ocean-friendly bags from GOT Bag and blankets from Sand Cloud so your day by the water feels good for you and a little gentler on the ocean too.

Special thanks to our friends at GOT Bag. They make saving the ocean look stylish and fun!

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Love nights in as much as you love a date night out? We’ve got you. Have friends over for a movie night or make it a cozy night in with your favorite person. You’ll get a Disney+ and Hulu subscription so you can watch Nat Geo ocean content, plus a curated list of ocean-friendly documentaries and a movie-night basket of snacks. Easy, comfy, and you’ll probably come out of it loving the ocean even more.

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Date includes two (2) three-day GA tickets. Does not include accommodation, travel, or flights.

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_{^{Giveaway ends 2/15/26 at 11:59pm PT. Winners will be selected at random and contacted via email from the Upworthy. No purchase necessary. Open to residents of the U.S. and specific Canadian provinces that have reached age of majority in their state/province/territory of residence at the time. Please see terms and conditions for specific instructions. Giveaway not affiliated with Instagram. More details at upworthy.com/oceandate}}

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How to keep your mouth shut in conversations when you know you should really stay quiet

Most people never regret just staying silent.

quiet, finger over lips, don't talk, keep it to yourself, silence

via Canva/Photos

A woman with her finger over her mouth.

It can be hard to stay quiet when you feel like you just have to speak your mind. But sometimes it's not a great idea to share your opinions on current events with your dad or tell your boss where they're wrong in a meeting. And having a bit of self-control during a fight with your spouse is a good way to avoid apologizing the next morning.

Further, when we fight the urge to talk when it's not necessary, we become better listeners and give others a moment in the spotlight to share their views. Building that small mental muscle to respond to events rather than react can make all the difference in social situations.

argument, coworkers, angry coworkers, hostile work enviornment, disagreement A woman is getting angry at her coworker.via Canva/Photos

What is the WAIT method?

One way people have honed the skill of holding back when they feel the burning urge to speak up is the WAIT method, an acronym for the question you should ask yourself in that moment: "Why Am I Talking?" Pausing to consider the question before you open your mouth can shift your focus from "being heard" to "adding value" to any conversation.

The Center for The Empowerment Dynamic has some questions we should consider after taking a WAIT moment:

What is my intention behind what I am about to say?
What question can I ask to better understand what the other person is saying?
Is my need to talk an attempt to divert the attention to me?
How might I become comfortable with silence rather than succumb to my urge to talk?

tape over muth, sielnce, be quiet, mouth shut, saying nothing A man with tape over his mouth.via Canva/Photos

The WAIT method is a good way to avoid talking too much. In work meetings, people who overtalk risk losing everyone's attention and diluting their point to the extent that others aren't quite sure what they were trying to say. Even worse, they can come across as attention hogs or know-it-alls. Often, the people who get to the heart of the matter succinctly are the ones who are noticed and respected.

Just because you're commanding the attention of the room doesn't mean you're doing yourself any favors or helping other people in the conversation.

The WAIT method is also a great way to give yourself a breather and let things sit for a moment during a heated, emotional discussion. It gives you a chance to cool down and rethink your goals for the conversation. It can also help you avoid saying something you regret.

fight, spuse disagreement, communications skills, upset husband, argument A husband is angry with his wife. via Canva/Photos

How much should I talk in a meeting?

So if it's a work situation, like a team meeting, you don't want to be completely silent. How often should you speak up?

Cary Pfeffer, a speaking coach and media trainer, shared an example of the appropriate amount of time to talk in a meeting with six people:

"I would suggest a good measure would be three contributions over an hour-long meeting from each non-leader participant. If anyone is talking five/six/seven times you are over-participating! Allow someone else to weigh in, even if that means an occasional awkward silence. Anything less seems like your voice is just not being represented, and anything over three contributions is too much."

Ultimately, the WAIT method is about taking a second to make sure you're not just talking to hear yourself speak. It helps ensure that you have a clear goal for participating in the conversation and that you're adding value for others. Knowing when and why to say something is the best way to make a positive contribution and avoid shooting yourself in the foot.

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communications tips

Dad makes painful but oh-so-relatable 'realization' about his toddler's first puddle splash

"You're officially a kid. You're no longer a baby."

parenting, toddlers, bittersweet , nostalgia, kids, viral tiktok, parenting content, raising kids

via @nickgorman0/TikTok, used with permission

A lighthearted moment turns bittersweet with a painful realization.

Parenting is full of bittersweet moments. Every milestone toward independence—walking, talking, the first day of school—marks the end of something precious and fleeting, a time when parents are their children's entire world. So while these firsts are, of course, joyful, it's completely natural for parents to feel a sense of grief.

One such moment happened recently for Nick Gorman while he was filming his daughter playing in a puddle for the first time.

The now-viral clip, posted to TikTok, seems lighthearted enough. Gorman encourages his little one to splash in the water, and when she does, he gushes, "You know what this means? You're officially a kid. You're no longer a baby."

The phrase clearly hit harder than Gorman thought it would, because in the caption he wrote, "Well that realization hurt."

@nick.gorman8 Didn’t realize what I’d said until I watched the video later on…woof! #kiddos #toddlersoftiktok #aww #kidsoftiktok #dad ♬ These Memories - Hollow Coves

It's a realization that's pretty darn universal, as indicated by the thousands of other parents who chimed in on the TikTok video with their own similarly wistful stories:

"Today I heard my daughter getting into the Pop-Tarts while I was doing the dishes and dried my hands waiting for the inevitable 'daddy will you open this?' And then minutes went by, and silence. Curious, I poked my head around the corner and saw her eating them happily. She saw me and announced that she did it herself. I was so proud. But I still move the box up another shelf because I am not ready to stop helping her."

"My daughter used to call ketchup 'dip dip.' One day I asked if she wanted dip dip and she said 'it's ketchup mom.' My heart broke."

See on Instagram

"My daughter used to hide from me when I'd get home from work. Came home expecting some elaborate hiding spot but she was just watching tv."

"One day I realized my babies quit calling me dada, and started saying daddy, and that was hard, but when I realized they had switched from daddy to dad that one had me in tears."

Experts seem to agree that when it comes to navigating these closing chapters, parents should permit themselves to feel whatever conflicting emotions arise and remember that it's a natural part of the process.

It's also important to remember that good things are still on the horizon. Every season brings its own special gifts and cherished memories. Even when kids finally leave the house to start their own adult lives, arguably the most bittersweet transition of all, parents are given the chance to explore other aspects of their identity that may have gone dormant during the more active days of parenthood.

Even Gorman seems to have recognized that his realization isn't entirely painful. In an interview with Newsweek, he shared, "While it's sad she's growing up, and we're already seeing our time with her pass, it's exciting at the same time to see her grow and experience new things—which is why I wanted to become a parent in the first place."

@nick.gorman8 Not ready for that…#dadsoftiktok #sad #notready #ironic #kids ♬ snowfall - Øneheart & reidenshi

Nobody becomes a parent expecting things to become simpler. But most would argue that the trade-off is beyond worth it. And stories like these can remind parents that they're not alone in whatever feelings they're experiencing.

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Happiness researcher explains how making a 'reverse bucket list' can change your life

Counterintuitive in our culture, but effective.

arthur c. brooks, harvard, psychology, happiness research, bucket list

Gage Skidmore/Wikimedia Commons

Harvard researcher Arthur C. Brooks studies what leads to human happiness.

We live in a society that prizes ambition, celebrating goal-setting, and hustle culture as praiseworthy vehicles on the road to success. We also live in a society that associates successfully getting whatever our hearts desire with happiness. The formula we internalize from an early age is that desire + ambition + goal-setting + doing what it takes = a successful, happy life.

But as Harvard University happiness researcher Arthur C. Brooks has found, in his studies as well as his own experience, that happiness doesn't follow that formula. "It took me too long to figure this one out," Brooks told podcast host Tim Ferris, explaining why he uses a "reverse bucket list" to live a happier life.

bucket list, wants, desires, goals, detachment Many people make bucket lists of things they want in life. Giphy

Brooks shared that on his birthday, he would always make a list of his desires, ambitions, and things he wanted to accomplish—a bucket list. But when he was 50, he found his bucket list from when he was 40 and had an epiphany: "I looked at that list from when I was 40, and I'd checked everything off that list. And I was less happy at 50 than I was at 40."

As a social scientist, he recognized that he was doing something wrong and analyzed it.

"This is a neurophysiological problem and a psychological problem all rolled into one handy package," he said. "I was making the mistake of thinking that my satisfaction would come from having more. And the truth of the matter is that lasting and stable satisfaction, which doesn't wear off in a minute, comes when you understand that your satisfaction is your haves divided by your wants…You can increase your satisfaction temporarily and inefficiently by having more, or permanently and securely by wanting less."

Brooks concluded that he needed a "reverse bucket list" that would help him "consciously detach" from his worldly wants and desires by simply writing them down and crossing them off.

"I know that these things are going to occur to me as natural goals," Brooks said, citing human evolutionary psychology. "But I do not want to be owned by them. I want to manage them." He discussed moving those desires from the instinctual limbic system to the conscious pre-frontal cortex by examining each one and saying, "Maybe I get it, maybe I don't," but crossing them off as attachments. "And I'm free…it works," he said.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

"When I write them down, I acknowledge that I have the desire," he explained on X. "When I cross them out, I acknowledge that I will not be attached to this goal."

The idea that attachment itself causes unhappiness is a concept found in many spiritual traditions, but it is most closely associated with Buddhism. Mike Brooks, PhD, explains that humans need healthy attachments, such as an attachment to staying alive and attachments to loved ones, to avoid suffering. But many things to which we are attached are not necessarily healthy, either by degree (over-attachment) or by nature (being attached to things that are impermanent).

"We should strive for flexibility in our attachments because the objects of our attachment are inherently in flux," Brooks writes in Psychology Today. "In this way, we suffer unnecessarily when we don't accept their impermanent nature."

What Arthur C. Brooks suggests that we strive to detach ourselves from our wants and desires because the simplest way to solve the 'haves/wants = happiness' formula is to reduce the denominator. The reverse bucket list, in which you cross off desires before you fulfill them, can help free you from attachment and lead to a happier overall existence.

This article originally appeared last year.

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Researchers tested 6 brands of bottled water against tap water, and there was a clear winner

New technology allowed them to analyze the water in ways they never could before.

water, workout, sweat, towell, woman at gym, bottled water, thirst

via Canva/Photos

A woman drinking bottled water after a workout.

Ever since bottled water became popular in the 1990s, there has been a vigorous debate over whether it's healthier to drink bottled water or tap water. Bottled-water aficionados often claim it's purer than tap water because it's traditionally marketed as being "from the source" or having come from an untouched stream. That has to be cleaner than water that reaches your home after traveling from God-knows-where through city pipes, right?

What many people don't realize is that bottled water isn't regulated as stringently as tap water. Tap water is overseen by the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), which requires more frequent testing and stricter disinfection standards. Bottled water is regulated by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) as a food product.

Tap water found to have fewer microplastics than bottled water

A recent study from The Ohio State University (OSU) delivered another big victory for Team Tap, finding that after testing six brands of bottled water against tap water from four water treatment plants, bottled water contained more than three times as many microplastics as tap water. The big problem is that plastic bottles can shed tiny plastic particles, smaller than a speck of dust, into the water when temperatures change, the cap is removed, or the bottle tumbles around in a purse or the back seat of a car.

tap water, kitchen water, boy drinking, thirsty boy, kitchen sink A boy drinking from the kitchen sink.via Canva/Photos

The tests revealed that the amount of microplastics in bottled water ranged from 2.6 to 11.5 million particles per liter, while tap water ranged from 1.6 to 2.6 million particles per liter. In the best-case scenario, tap water contains similar levels of microplastics, but in the worst-case scenario, bottled water contains more than seven times as many.

The researchers were surprised by their findings because nanoplastics are so small that they've been hard to quantify in the past.

"This lack of knowledge primarily reflects limitations in the methods to isolate and analyze the nanoplastics," said Megan Jamison Hart, a PhD candidate at OSU and the study's lead researcher. "In this study, we developed and validated a novel method for isolating MNPs [micro- and nanoplastics], allowing for the determination of their concentrations using scanning electron microscopy and identification using optical photothermal infrared spectroscopy (OPTIR)."

Are microplastics harmful to humans?

Much more research on microplastics is needed to determine their potential harm to humans. Studies have linked microplastics to impaired immune function, increased inflammation, and cellular damage in animals. Researchers believe that larger nanoplastics pass through the digestive tract and are eventually excreted. Smaller nanoplastics, however, may move into human tissues and even enter the brain.

"While we don't really fully understand the human health risks associated with nanoplastic exposure, it's still better to try and mitigate that risk because evidence indicates that they do cause problems, even if we're not fully aware of what those are yet," said Hart.

water bottle, plastic, thirsday woman, woman workout, workout clothes, A woman drinking out of a plastic water bottle. via Canva/Photos

Given that scientists have yet to determine the harm that micro- and nanoplastics can cause in our bodies, they believe it's best to avoid them as much as possible.

"We can make educated choices to try and reduce our daily exposure to these harmful chemicals," said Hart. "For the average person who is thirsty and wants a drink, the best way to do that would be drinking it straight out of the tap rather than grabbing pre-bottled water."

Hart told StudyFinds that the best thing to do is ditch bottled water and instead drink filtered tap water from a reusable metal bottle.

"This has definitely changed my own drinking habits," she said. "I was primarily a tap water drinker before, knowing that disposable bottles were bad for the environment, but this is something I am even more adamant about now, and I swapped my reusable plastic bottle for a reusable metal one."

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Young woman who 'doesn't want kids' holds a baby for the first time and was so not prepared

Baby fever hits some harder than others.

baby, baby fever, biological urge to have a baby, want a baby, having a child

Photo credit: Canva

Holding a baby can trigger a wave of "baby fever."

Choosing to have a child is one of the biggest life decisions a person can make and a highly individual choice. Some people know they want to be parents from a young age, some people decide to never have kids, and a whole lot of people fall somewhere in between. Some plan to have kids and it doesn’t work out. Others have no desire to have kids until something happens and suddenly they do.

A perfect example of such a change of heart can be seen in a video from Daniela Brkic, who captured the moment her friend, who didn’t want kids, held a baby for the first time. She clearly wasn’t prepared for how she would feel, as we see the young woman holding the baby with tears streaming down her cheeks and a look of utter joy and bewilderment on her face.

@daniela.brkic
First time holding a baby and now she wants 8, probably my favourite video ever 😭😂 #fyp @brkicbaby

She's so taken with the wee one that she can barely look at her. As her friends wipe her tears (at her request, so she doesn't get them on the baby), she says, "I need to have a kid," and "I want to take my top off and have skin-to-skin contact."

Brkic wrote that it was the friend's "first time holding a baby," adding, "and now she wants 8." So many people recognized the overwhelming urge to have a baby coming out of nowhere and commiserated in the comments.

"If that’s not baby FEVER then idk what is."

"Omg don't let her smell the baby's head. 😭😂"

"Just another example of our bodies betraying our good common sense. 😂"

"Her-i dont want kids. her uterus-WE ARE SOOOOO GETTING ONE OF THESE!!!! 🥰🥰🥰"

"Her ovaries activated 😂❤️❤️❤️"

baby, baby fever, biological urge to have a baby, want a baby, having a child, baby feet Tiny baby toes are too cute. Photo credit: Canva

"Those maternal instincts booted down the door and arrived with a BANG with the skin to skin comment 🤣🤣🤣"

"She’s not ready for skin to skin, her heart will literally explode."

"What a wholesome crash out 😂🥰❤️"

"She’s going to be the greatest mom!"

"THIS HAPPENED TO ME. I NEVER WANTED KIDS. Then I held a baby and it drooled on me and laughed. We now have 2 and they're my favorite people in THE WHOLE WORLD AND THEY'RE SO FUN."

"I NEVER wanted kids!!! I held my cousin's baby and fell in love. That was July of 2014. My son was born July of 2015!!!!"

baby, baby fever, biological urge to have a baby, want a baby, having a child Beware the sleepy baby as a baby fever trigger.Photo credit: Canva

Other commenters warned her that the baby fever is a temporary feeling, with some going so far as to call it a "trick" or a "trap." After all, they don't stay sweet, adorable babies forever.

"They DONT ALWAYS SLEEP. They're much harder awake. Do not fall for sleeping babies."

"Give her a toddler, she will get over it really quick 😵💫😂"

"now give her a 3 year old that has missed their nap, got the blue cup instead of the green and their biscuits broke 👹👹👹"

"Girl it’s a trick 😩 they start that cute for a reason."

"It’s a trap. They need cars and insurance 😭"

Is 'baby fever' a real phenomenon?

Yep. It is. That doesn't mean everyone experiences it, of course. But according to Gary Brase, an associate professor of psychology at Kansas State University who spent nearly 10 years studying the “baby fever” phenomenon, not only is it real, but it’s not limited to women. Though it shows up more frequently and to a stronger degree in females, it happens across the gender spectrum,. Brase and his wife Sandra went into their research looking at three theories about what contributes to a sudden, strong urge to have a baby:

1. The sociocultural view: "People want to have a baby because they are taught gender roles. Women think they should have children because society says that is what they are supposed to do."

2. The byproduct view: "Humans experience nurturance. When they see a cute baby they want to take care of it, and that makes them want to have a baby of their own. Baby fever is a by-product -- it is nurturance misplaced."

3. The adaptationist view: "Baby fever is an emotional signal -- like a suggestion sent from one part of the mind to the other parts -- that this could be a good time to have a child."

baby, baby fever, biological urge to have a baby, want a baby, having a child Is "baby fever" a natural phenomenon? Photo credit: Canva

But the results of their research found three different factors that contribute to wanting to have a child.

"The first two had to do with the visual sensory things," Brase told NBC News. "Seeing a baby, hearing a baby, smelling a baby led some people to want to have a baby." Conversely, seeing the more “disgusting” parts of having a baby, such as dirty diapers and spit-up, had an anti-baby-fever effect. The third factor was about life circumstances and trade-offs that made it seem feasible or not feasible to have a baby.

"People would say, 'I don't want to have a baby because I don't have money or I don't have time or I don't have a partner," Brase said. "All of the rational thoughts. That showed up as a third factor."

The mix of biological urge and societal conditioning can be a potent combo, which is why older adults will often tell young people that they might change their mind. Then again, they might not. Plenty of people live happy, fulfilling lives without having children, and plenty of people who never saw themselves becoming a parent find it to be the highlight of their life.

Time will tell whether this woman's baby fever is temporary or permanent, but how lucky is that baby to be surrounded by so much love?

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