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A couple looking at a photo album together.

People who love reminiscing about the good ol' days are often criticized for living in the past and are told to keep looking forward. It makes sense. Often, people who become overly interested in the great times they had in high school are neglecting the fact that things can be just as good in the present. It almost feels like they peaked at a young age. It’s also dangerous to fall into the trap of seeing the past through rose-colored glasses and thinking that the world has gone downhill.

However, science has found that for older people, looking back and reminiscing, especially with loved ones, can do great things for their memory and mental well-being.

“It really puts people back on the center of the stage during the reminiscence, that they have a primary role in what’s going on,” Dr. David Merrill, director of Pacific Neuroscience Institute’s Pacific Brain Health Center in Santa Monica, California, says, according to BrainHQ. “It’s really a way to celebrate their lives with people.”

photos, old photos, elderly people, nurse, good old days, reminsching People look at old photos.via Canva/Photos

What is reminiscence therapy?

VeryWellMind says that reminiscence therapy has an incredible number of benefits, including improved self-esteem, reduced stress, a reduction in depression symptoms, a heightened sense of well-being, and better bonds with loved ones.

Merrill suggests that older people incorporate reminiscing into their daily routine.

“I think it would be good to have a daily practice of reminiscence. You might want to fold that in with a gratitude practice,” Merrill says. “Reminiscing about a meaningful moment or positive life event could be at a specific time of day or part of a morning ritual. I think the benefit would be additive over time.”

How to get the most out of a daily reminiscing practice

One of the most effective ways to practice reminiscence therapy is to elicit memories from all five senses. Elder Care Alliance says you can do this through:

Sound: Listening to their favorite music.

Taste: Making their favorite meals.

Scent: Creating “scent cards” that bear a familiar scent, such as a loved one's perfume or cologne.

Touch: Reconnecting them with tactile activities they once did, such as knitting, sewing, or drawing.

Sight: Looking at old photographs.

couple, middle-aged coupe, couple remembering, coule holding eachother, memories, good memories, A couple holding each other.via Canva/Photos

Coming into contact with old photos, magazines, or listening to old music can also help people unlock memories of people and events they thought they had long forgotten. A recent study published by Cell found that when we make new memories, many of the ones we thought we had forgotten were actually stored elsewhere in the brain. They can be impossible to retrieve if we just sit there and strain our brains to think about them. However, if we are given an artifact that relates to the memory, we can retrieve it.

An older person may struggle to recall the details of their first house, such as its interior or street number. But if you show them a picture of the house from the outside, they may become flooded with memories they thought were long gone.

The concept of reminiscence therapy is a positive one for older people who may feel like they’re being a burden for wanting to relive their past. Telling them that it's acceptable and great for their mental health may encourage them to share what they’ve been keeping to themselves. As a bonus, you’ll probably get to hear some incredible stories that you wouldn’t have otherwise.

A man looking at his phone on the toilet.

Have you ever been scrolling through social media on your phone and then suddenly wondered where all the time went? You glance at the clock and wonder, “OMG, did I really just spend 30 minutes mindlessly scrolling on this app?” Well, after a new report published in PLOS ONE, you’ll think twice about getting lost doomscrolling while sitting on the toilet.

A team of researchers at Boston Medical Center found that people who scroll on their phones while pooping have a much higher chance of getting hemorrhoids. Hemorrhoids are swollen veins, akin to varicose veins, that are either internal or external. They can be painful, itchy, and sometimes bleed.

Looking at your smartphone on the toilet could cause hemorrhoids

“Smartphone use on the toilet was associated with a 46% increased risk of hemorrhoids,” the paper found after adjusting for sex, age, fiber intake, and exercise activity. To come to this grim conclusion, the researchers interviewed 125 patients at the medical center and asked them about their toilet habits, including whether they scrolled through their phone or not.

phone, toilet, hemorrhoids, smartphone, tiktok, social media, toilet health A woman looking at her phone on the toilet.via Canva/Photos

What the researchers found was that those who bring their phone into the bathroom spend more time on the toilet; therefore, increasing the likelihood of developing hemorrhoids. “Of all respondents, 83 (66%) used smartphones while on the toilet,” the study found. “Furthermore, smartphone users spent considerably more time on the toilet compared to non-smartphone users, with many spending more than five minutes on the toilet per visit.”

Of those who looked at the phone on the toilet, 37.3% said that they sat on the throne for six to fifteen minutes. Non-phone users sat longer than six minutes only 7.1% of the time. "The likely explanation is that prolonged sitting increases pressure in the veins around the rectum, which can contribute to hemorrhoids," Dr. Ernesto Gonzaga, a gastroenterologist from the Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania, told ABC News.

“When you’re sitting on an open toilet bowl, you have no pelvic floor support,” Dr. Trisha Pasricha, the study’s senior author and a gastroenterologist at Massachusetts General Hospital, told CNN. The study said that 54% of people who use the phone while pooping are reading the news, and 44% said they were scrolling through social media.

phone, toilet, hemorrhoids, smartphone, tiktok, social media, toilet health A man looking at his phone on the toilet.via Canva/Photos

The study was conducted on people 45 and over

The study was conducted on people aged 45 and older, a beneficial group to examine because some individuals in this age group don’t bring their phones to the bathroom. The study would have been much harder to conduct on younger people.

“It was helpful to have this (45 and older) group because there were people who didn’t use their smartphones on the toilet. So we had a comparison group,” Dr. Trisha Pasricha, the study’s senior author, told CNN. “Having a third of people not bringing their smartphones to the bathroom helped us understand what a baseline could look like, especially as I imagine the situation is more profound for younger individuals.”

If you’re afraid of developing hemorrhoids, the first step is to make sure that, if you take your phone with you to the bathroom, you stop scrolling when you’re done evacuating your bowels. You can also eat more high fiber foods, such as fruits and vegetables, and be sure to exhale while pushing and not strain. It’s also important to keep a healthy weight and to avoid sitting for too long, whether on a toilet or in your car. Hemorrhoids are a pain in the butt, and they’re not worth it, no matter how great the latest tea is on TikTok.

Photo by Leo_Visions on Unsplash

A van in the desert.

Sometimes, when life gets too complicated, we need to slow down and get smaller. This was the case for Lori Losch, who woke up one day, post-50-years-old, and decided it was time for a change.

As she explains in a video posted to the Tiny Homes YouTube channel, "I decided to do 'van life' for a couple of reasons. One was to heal from some pretty traumatic life events. And the other was to find a smaller town to move to, to be able to interview small towns as I traveled."

Losch reveals on her website that she battled addiction for a quarter of a century. "I’m a soul who finally broke free from the addiction cycle after a 25-year battle. I used the pain of powerlessness, acute anxiety, and bouts of deep depression to point me towards truth and freedom." After leaning into 12-step programs, psychedelic plant healing, faith, and relying on her community, she shares she has truly learned what it is to be alive.

Part of that is traveling, and this is something she likes to do on her own terms. So, she custom-designed a van to feel like a "tiny home" where she lives, works, travels, and heals. She even bought a custom curtain to separate the front area (where the driving happens) from the back so that it feels less like an RV and more like a home.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

On her tour, she first shows the viewers a swivel desk. "It's been an amazing feature, this lagoon table." It serves as her office when she's talking to clients, but also as a hub if she just wants to sip a latte or watch a movie on her laptop with her dog by her side.

She designed her kitchen so that her sink would have a big window view, which changes daily. "I wanted to have a lot of counter space and also the butcher block creates just warmth in the van." Of the large sink, she loves that she can wash her 11-pound dog Tessa in it. Her tiny fridge/freezer is "low volt," above which she has organized food storage. "You learn how to live just much more minimally, but I cook great food in this little kitchen. You know how they say three-point kitchen? Well, this is a one-point kitchen and it's perfection."

Losch also notes that when you scale down to just the essentials, you might find greater value in those things. She alludes to having had large homes in the past, one with "1500 books." Now, she simply has the books she's reading or plans to read. "When I'm done with them, they move on to other people." (The books incidentally hide the interior antenna for her "weBoost system," which helps boost cell service "when you're in a dodgy spot.")

books, cozy corner, design, van life, travel An open book sitting on top of a table next to a candle. Photo by anotherxlife on Unsplash

The bathroom is incredibly innovative, but, ironically, she found she didn't need much of what was built. She points out that while she has an exterior shower, she thought she wanted an interior shower, as well. And although she has a super cool setup wherein she flips a little table over and puts up a shower curtain, she prefers showering outside. As for the toilet, "I got a Cassette Toilet. It's like the best thing you can buy and I've never put my butt on it." She continues, "I climb a lot of mountains. I'm mainly out in nature, and nature is fine." Instead, she uses the area for laundry and storage and claims, "I roll with it cuz it's here. I use it for something different than I anticipated."

Her bedroom is cozy and, though she designed it like a little cave, it has a small window too. She got a ten-inch foam mattress set up at the back of the van, and the doors hinge out. She shares, "When I'm backed onto a lake or a river, I open up both doors and they hinge 270 degrees. That was super important to me. So I'm just up here, room with a view—it's awesome."

lake view, van life, outdoor living, mental health, travel A lake surrounded by mountains. Photo by clement fusil on Unsplash

Every design decision came with a lot of research and intentionality. She has an AC and diesel heating system, which she explains, "...Uses your fuel. It pipes out from under the passenger seat into the van and takes about two minutes, literally, to heat this place up." She also meticulously built a garage that houses the electrical features. "I went with 300 solar watt panels on the roof and they charge 400 amp hours of lithium battery. And I've got a DC to DC inverter, so when you're driving the van, it's also charging."

She explains, "A question I get asked often is 'Why? Why the van? Why tiny living?' And I think for me, my life was always fairly contained. I liked to live below my means. I didn't like a whole lot of extravagance and waste. Then I got married and I found myself with someone who was extravagant in a lot of things, with multiple homes. When I came out of it, it's like the pendulum had to go way back this way for my soul to heal."

Losch shares her end game is to "find a piece of land" to build on and be self-contained. And though people tell her that her van is small, she says it's not about the size of the van, "It's about where the van takes you."

The comments, and there are over a thousand, buzz with support. One person writes, "I don't know which is more beautiful—this lovely woman, or the peaceful home she has created. Wonderful video, and I wish her healing and happiness in her travels."

So many seem to relate to her need for repair after addiction and are inspired by the idea that one can change their life at any age. "What a gorgeous woman! She is over 50—let that sink in... Oh, and the van is lovely—kudos to her!"


Health

Therapist praised for his empathetic assessment on why Gen-Z seems so apathetic

Perhaps the Gen Z stare deserves a lot more compassion than we're giving it.

@austincalo/TikTok

Therapist Austin Calo offers an empathetic take of the generation known for it's vacant stare.

We’ve all heard jokes about the “Gen Z stare,” and perhaps have even made a few jabs ourselves. But after hearing Texas-based therapist Austin Calo’s nuanced, empathetic take on why this generation often seems so apathetic, we might be moved to hold off on the wisecracks.

Calo, who regularly posts therapy content on his TikTok, recently went viral for sharing his observations about his Gen Z clients. The first thing he discussed was the collective “external locus of control.”

Calo explained this as a mindset of thinking “something is happening to you rather than you impacting it." He mainly attributed this to Gen Z entering adulthood during a global pandemic, which was obviously so disruptive and debilitating that many of us, Gen z or not, began to develop a nihilistic point of view.

“Naturally, you would detach from the result and view yourself as relatively powerless,” he said.

Next, he brought up social media. Which, yes, we’ve talked at length about the negative impact social media’s mainstream presence has had on young adults especially, but Calo nonetheless offered some different insight.

He noted that the Internet, an omnipresent “faceless” place where one can easily be publicly humiliated, has not only exacerbated a “fear of being cringe,” but "shattered" a sense of real community. However, since we are still naturally hardwired to seek community, we do it digitally.

This is why Calo has seen so many Gen Zers “hyper-pathologizing” mental illness or clinging to a sexual identity online, because at least being “boxed” into a group provides some sense of belonging, however artificial. This of course adds unnecessary pressure to immediately carve out a brand of sorts rather than simply exist and explore.

@justpeers logging off (metaphorically I’m always logged in so more like “closing the app”) for the day #genz ♬ original sound - joan


“There's not a sense of openness to figure something out or that it'll come in time or later, there's this pressure to identify with something right now."

And yet, the possibly positive consequence of being chronically online, Calo noted, is that Gen Zers generally have higher media literacy. “They know what you're trying to do, they know you're trying to manipulate them, so there's a sense of, um, kind of collective resistance to, like, pandering, you know?"

Still, this higher media literacy doesn't necessarily protect Gen Z from being manipulated or marketed to, Calo argues. In fact, he says the odds are even higher of it happening, because being exposed to a catered ‘For You' page “wears you down over the course of time.”

In essence, Gen Z’s detachment is mostly a trauma response, “[Be]cause it feels like something's asked of them all the time,” according to Calo.

Calo concluded, “I see these takes online of trashing Gen Z or, like, the Gen Z staring stuff. This is to help understand and empathize with a generation that feels totally powerless in the face of a polarizing political climate and being marketed to and politicized on social media, meaning being manipulated on social media through politics...and so I think it's helpful to have a sense of empathy rather than 'Oh, these kids...'"

Calo’s video, which garnered 2.7 millions views, clearly struck a chord with Gen Zers, who flooded the comments with thank you’s and shared how other factors, like climate change, politics, and the economy have impacted their mindset.

“Gen Z and I definitely feel like I don’t actually ‘exist’ in the world. I often feel like I’m observing life and not actively participating in it…I don’t really have any expectations for my future and have adopted a mentality of whatever happens, happens.”

“Also the environment! We grew up being told that we wouldn’t see our children grow up unless people made changes and then we had to watch those things just…not happen.”

“We are pretty powerless: failing economy, dying plenty, no no hope.”

“So many of us try to make a career like we were told but unless you were born with money it seems like a losing game. I have a degree and I don’t feel further along than I did four years ago.”

“Another thing I think is that a lot of Gen Z has found out about the human condition and how utterly disappointing life can be through political agendas and manipulation through media.”

And yet, Calo upholds his belief that, despite these warranted coping mechanisms, Gen Zers are "incredibly resilient and courageous.” They just have trouble seeing that strength within themselves. For that, Calo has a bit of advice, which he shared with Buzzfeed.

"Boldly challenge the voices in your head and incessantly trace them until you’ve found the source. All ideas have an origin,” he said. “We wear others’ ideas all the time…You might find your actual voice is far more encouraging, hopeful, self-assuring, and kind than you may believe."

He added, "Think of who has positively impacted your life and treat yourself the way they’ve treated you. You might find that you are worth that love and adoration after all."

Additionally, Calo told Upworthy that while he sees Gen Z nihilism as a perfectly valid form of self preservation, he encourages them to reframe how they see hope, so that it feels like a potential trap for pain.

"Hope does not cause tragedy, nor does it foresee an outcome. Its purpose is to make our present more tolerable. Many believe that when we hope and subsequently fail, we ought to feel humiliated and ashamed of ourselves for believing a positive result was possible. However, that outcome was in the cards whether we felt hopeful or not. Hope just made the experience better than it would have been otherwise. Hope doesn’t yield deeper failure; it mitigates it."

Lastly, though Calo recognizes economic security as necessary to contentment (making it disheartening that it's out of reach for so many) community is just as valuable, and far more "controllable." So, when in doubt— "create community. You won’t regret it."

Honestly, that sounds likes pretty good advice, no matter what age you are.

Keep up with Calo (including updates on his music!) on TikTok