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Older people get real about what it's like to move into a retirement community

"Do your homework before taking the plunge."

retirement community, retirement home, old people, seniors, senior citizens
Image via Canva

Old people discuss what moving into a retirement community is really like.

Moving into a retirement community is a big life transition for many senior citizens. Making the choice to downsize and move into a retirement home is not an easy one that can come with many unknowns.

In an Reddit forum, member @common_grounder posed the question: "Anyone who's downsized and moved into a retirement community, what's the adjustment been like for you?"

They continued, "Has it been hard giving up your former life and belongings? Is a more simplified existence comforting to you? Has being around lots of people who are also old been a net positive or net negative?"

Older people who have made the transition into a retirement community shared their real and honest experiences for those considering making the move. These are 16 of their most informative and impactful responses:

 retirement home, retirement community, retirement living, assisted living, old people The Villages Dancing GIF by Magnolia Pictures  Giphy  

"I've been in an Independent Living Community for 2 years. I was having some health issues and I needed a place that had on duty staff. I downsized twice. My wife and I downsized from a 3 bedroom house to a 2 bedroom Apartment. My wife developed Vascular Dementia the year before the Pandemic. Eventually she went into hospice and after my 3rd hip surgery in 18 months I moved into Independent Living. My 1st year here my bride of 39 years past on from complications of the Vascular Dementia. When I first got here I participated with some of the outing and events. We get 2 meals a day and I used to do dinner with the same group daily. The Presidential election changed that. I loved the people I sat with. However I was crushed that so many of my older peers voted against their interests. I just turned 70 on D-Day. On the average I'm a "youngster" here. Before the election I constantly helped residents conquer their smartphones be it iphone or Android. Now I order lunch and dinner for me to pick up and eat alone in my apartment. I only venture out now for Dr's appointments and the occasional family outing . I guess more than any thing I miss my bride of 39 years, 44 together. I'm looking forward that my 29 year old son is getting married in August to a wonderful woman and their future looks bright. I'm grateful technology allows me to talk, text and facetime people I care about. At my age, I don't have many long time friends still on this plane of existence. Even when I downsized to this one bedroom Apartment I still have too much stuff including Heirloom China in my living room for my son that been here 2 years. Oh I almost forgot. We have a happy hour on Wednesday afternoon. I always go and get a vodka tonic and finger food. I was told by my parents to never drink alone. Do that one drink a week is me not drinking alone." —@sapotts61

"I live in a retirement community and I like it a lot. No exterior maintenance, lots of activities and amenities. Beautifully landscaped grounds and great views from my home. Being around similarly aged people is nice too. I really can’t think of a negative. But the quality of the communities vary. Do your homework before taking the plunge." —@Entire-Garage-1902

"My wife and I did it 11 years ago. We sold our 4 bedroom 3 bath 2 story house and moved into a 2 bedroom 2 bath single level house in a 55 and better community. It’s been terrific! We have a resort like pool next to the clubhouse and gym. There are tennis and pickle ball courts, gas grills, a big charcoal grill, sauna and spa. It’s a quiet, safe, well kept neighborhood with friendly neighbors." —@8amteetime

 downsizing, retirement community, retirement home, moving out, downsize GIF by Stellify Media  Giphy  

"One month into assisted living. I think it’s going to be fine. Just another life transition like college, being on my own, getting married, having kids, building a career, moving into a bigger showplace house, etc. Just in reverse - everything getting smaller and simpler. Downsizing has been very challenging, getting rid of so many objects that still mean something to us, but won’t mean anything to our kids, and there’s not enough space in our 950 sq ft apartment. Having the staff do all the cooking - food has been quite good! - cleaning, and managing my medications, has certainly simplified our lives. And freed up time for my wife to do things she chooses, not just things she must. Moved to a different state where we knew no one, except our sons and their families, so we’re meeting a lot of new people. Haven’t really clicked with anyone yet, but have a half dozen people we can join for meals in the dining room. Yeah, adjustment is going fine." —@dnhs47

"I (64M) wasn’t ready for it and my wife and I are moving out. I miss seeing kids and families." —@MacDaddy654321

"It's a very difficult thing. It sounds simple, correct. But it's what you make of it in your new life. I used to do warranty work for brand new modular homes. Many are doing just that...downsizing. While working, you wind up chatting with many. The stories would run the whole gamut, from ecstatic to downright miserable. My takeaway if you can afford it was maybe try a couple of years' lease/rent before committing. Sit on any s to get a feel for it first. It was quite heart-wrenching at times. Should have, could have. There's mental factors to think of. Your circle of friends may change. Someone other than you could be in charge of your property. Suddenly, there's not a whole lot you can use those tools on anymore, etc. It's a tough thing to do." —@xgrader

 elderly, senior, seniors, senior citizen, old woman Old Lady Fight GIF by BDHCollective  Giphy  

"We are UPSIZING when move to a retirement community." —@FootHikerUtah

"We upsized into a 55+ community. Sometimes I miss the age diversity with neighbors but my husband and I are 64, pretty active with previously established friendships, part time jobs, and our family. We like that there is a clubhouse with book clubs, game nights, community dinners and a lovely swimming pool. I feel like it’s a home where we can age in place for as long as possible." —@Competitive-Ice2956

"I am almost 70. I have downsized hugely. I lived in a retirement community for 4 years from 61 to 65 I hated it!" —@Direct_Ad2289

"We’ve been in an over 55 community 8 yrs. I love my little house, all on one floor, lots of storage. It’s a bit lonely when our snow bird neighbors go home for the summer, but the grocery store is less crowded. We’ve had several neighbors die recently, but that’s why they call this Gods waiting room. It’s also worrisome to see neighbors having physical or dementia like issues. We aren’t into the pool scene or golf, but we love the indoor walking track. The entertainment shows are a hassle, gotta get those tickets months in advance. We tried a few day long bus trips but their prices are way too high now. Our community is over 40 yrs old and pre 2020 we had thriving crafts, cards, wood, metal, auto, photo clubs….people in charge of those kind of drifted away during the lockdown and a lot of knowledge and organizational skills to run those programs were lost. It’s very quiet here, most neighbors keep their homes very tidy. I’m in a single family home, I have yearly membership dues but no HOA…those are running around $300 a month. We have a great Facebook page that helps us all stay connected and compare notes. All in all I have zero qualms about leaving my old life." —@Adrift715

"2/2 1400 sq ft villa. It was hard deciding what to keep and what to get rid of at first, but in the end, it was liberating. I love the fact that we can just lock the door and leave without having to worry about outside maintenance." —@RowdyRumRunner

 over 55, over 55 community, retirement, retirement community, retirement home homer simpson episode 10 GIF  Giphy  

"I’m in a 55 and over community. It’s a very active community, dances at least 2 per month, bingo on Sunday, movies on Thursday, exercise classes at least 3 per day including yoga, karaoke, cards, swimming…I could go on but you get the drift. No obligation to attend any of the activities but they are available. No meals, this is independent living. I’m really happy here, best choice I made after selling my house. Downside for some is living with rules, some people don’t like picking up after their dogs or speed limits or whatever, my place isn’t super controlling but any rules are too much for some people." —@Kitchen-Fee-5114

"I like it, being on my own I didn’t want a house with all the maintenance. I have a small apartment so I had to get rid of a lot of stuff, that can be hard but I did it. Where I live there is a lot of activities if you are interested, but it’s independent living and some people like that and some don’t. I have made friends, play cards and always have something to do if I’m bored. One of the things you don’t think of is that you meet people and then they die. That is something that can be hard to deal with." —@Birdy304

 aging, aging well, happy aging, getting old, old people Aging Golden Girls GIF by All Better  Giphy  

"I upsized when I moved to a retirement community - my Manhattan apartment was 440 square feet, and my car was in a garage two miles away. Here in Connecticut, I've got 1500 square feet plus a basement and garage. I've got more stuff than ever." —@vinyl1earthlink

"We downsized from our home we lived in for 35 years to a tiny home (399 sq ft) three years ago. While the community is not age restricted, 95% of the people are retired and at least 65. We live on a lake so I get to fish as much as I want. Wife enjoys a bunch of activities such as water aerobics, arts and crafts and dancing. We travel the park in a golf cart. It’s takes minutes to get from one activity to the next. Overall we love it." —@Dicedlr711vegas

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Pet behaviorist explains the viral phenomenon of people buying their cats concrete slabs

A pet behaviorist explains why this trend is actually purrfect enrichment.

@annieknowsanimals/TikTok

Cat owners everywhere are shocked to see how much their feline love a simple $2 concrete slab.

If you’ve traipsed through @CatTok over the past few days, you’ve undoubtedly come across various videos of cat parents bringing their feline friends a fairly unusual yet surprisingly effective enrichment tool. We are talking of course about a concrete slab. Yes, you read that right. Not a fancy new scratching post. Not some laser contraption. A cement square. That’s it.

Seriously, folks are going in droves to Home Depot to purchase these unassuming blocks. And every time they present their kitties this new treat, the reactions look something like this:

 
 @shecatcalls PART 2 | Cat enrichment ideas. The way she sits more on this $7 brick than any of the actual cat beds and huts I buy her 😂 Can anyone else relate? 🤦♀️ Video idea inspired by Kurt the Cat @Abram Engle @The Home Depot #creatorsearchinsights #cats #cattok #sillycat #funny #meow ♬ Cute - In Music 
 
 


 
 @renusdelph I bought concrete slabs for my cats #cat #catsoftiktok #orangecat #orangecatbehavior #catlovers #viralcats #funnycat ♬ original sound - Renus Delph 
 
 


 
 @mrmilothechonk I should have bought 3 😂 #foryou #foryoupage #cats #catsoftiktok #viral ♬ Almost forgot that this was the whole point - Take my Hand Instrumental - AntonioVivald 
 
 

The trend seems like it could have been ignited by this orange tabby (named Kurt) below, who loved rolling around on the sidewalk, thus inspiring his owner Abram Engle to see if he'd enjoy a concrete slab just as much. Spoiler alert: he did.

 
 @abrameng Kurt was conking the crete
 ♬ original sound - Abram Engle 
 
 

There have been as many theories as to why kitties go gaga for concrete as there are toy mice under the couch (meaning, a lot). But below, pet behaviorist Dr. Annie gives a few of her hunches as to what's driving this phenomeownon…though she adds the caveat that there haven’t yet been any official studies on it. So it's all based on her educated guesses.

 
 @annieknowsanimals why do cats like concrete? 🤔 here are my thoughts on the latest cat enrichment #trend! vc: @aero.mace #catbehavior #catsoftiktok #cat #cats ♬ original sound - Dr. Annie | pet behaviorist 
 
 

“First, I think cats are enjoying the concrete slab being brought into their homes because they are new and kind of out of place. There’s probably nothing quite like them already in the home environment,” Dr. Annie says.

This might initially sound counterintuitive, since it’s generally accepted that cats thrive on routine. While this may be true, as Dr. Annie has discussed in previous videos, their "predatory and territorial nature” makes them "sensitive to novelty.” When a toy seems static, it no longer mimics actual live prey, and therefore does not stimulate kitty as it would in nature. Same goes for cat beds and scratching posts, as they’re used to exploring and monitoring their environment. When something “new” appears in their territory, they are very motivated to interact with it.

 
 @annieknowsanimals Replying to @joshtmeadows let’s explain why cats are so sensitive to “new” stuff! @Abram Engle ♬ original sound - Dr. Annie | pet behaviorist 
 
 

Second, Dr. Annie surmises that the concrete’s porous surface makes it really great for holding onto the cat's scent, which is a key factor in marking a kitty's territory. Again, cat’s really like knowing (or in this case, smelling) what’s theirs. In many videos, you can see cat’s actively rubbing their cheek glands on the slab, Dr. Annie notes.

Also, and probably more of a no-brainer, the concrete surface is very, very fun for scratching! And while we all might know that cats enjoy the tactile pleasure of using their claws, having a part of their environment that they have control over is very fulfilling for their mental health.

Lastly, Dr. Annie confirms what many cat parents assumed, which is that temperature plays a huge role in making the concrete slab cat-friendly. Cats like warmth because they have a higher body temperature, and evolved from creatures that live in warmer climates (like topical jungles, African plains, etc.). If they are seeking a way to raise their temperature—especially in air conditioned homes—a concrete slab that’s been soaking up the sun is a great way to do so.

Thank you Dr. Annie for that fascinating deep dive. Those all seem like pretty solid theories. And while we might not ever get actual studies on this, there’s yet another fact that becomes abundantly clear: cat parents will go above and beyond to make their fur babies happy. Even if that means taking on a job in construction for free concrete.

For even more fantastic cat facts, give Dr. Annie a follow on TikTok.

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Television

A surprisingly impressive dancing dog duo brought the house down on 'America's Got Talent'

Sure, border collies are smart, but this is something else.

America's Got Talent/YouTube

Roni Sagi and her dog, Rhythm, love to dance together.

What dog owner wouldn’t want to jam out to Queen with their pup while the world watches? Of course, our version probably wouldn’t be nearly as impressive as what Roni Sagi and her black and white border collie, aptly named Rhythm, did for America's Got Talent in August 2024.

First off, audiences knew they’d instantly be in for a treat when Sagi and Rhythm recreated the band’s famous pose for “Bohemian Rhapsody.” But it only got better from there in a routine that featured a mash-up of “Bohemian Rhapsody” and “Don’t Stop Me Now.”

 queen bohemian rhapsody  Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody" never disappoints.  Giphy  

The dance duo wowed judges and audiences alike with synchronized steps, turns, flips, and even a cool bridge pose trick (seriously, this was a dog owner’s dream come to life). Simon Cowell jokingly asked “How do we know that the dog is a real dog?” because Rhythm was just that good.

Sagi would later end up sharing that Rhythm earned his name from an early age, already tapping his little feet on her bed at only 6 weeks old. By that point, Sagi had already had experience training therapy dogs, which undoubtedly gave her a good foundation for working with her little “tornado storm.”

  - YouTube  youtu.be  

Perhaps it shouldn't come as that much of a surprise that Rhythm is so gifted. After all, border collies are notorious for being able to pick up skills quickly, and there have been several border collies that have broken world records—including records for intelligence, balance, and skateboarding (yes, really).

But Sagi seems to credit their chemistry less on Rhythm’s species traits, and more on his individual personality. “It’s so much fun to have a partner that wants [to perform] as much as you,” she said. “He wants to do it all, and he wants to do it now, and he wants to do it as good as he can.”

 border collie, dog, clapping dog Border collie clapping Giphy  

Down in the comments, online viewers shared their praises—and awe—for Rhythm’s performance.

“This was the most amazing dog act I've seen!” one person wrote.

“That precious dog Rhythm is SO talented and smart!!! I don’t understand how he knows what to do when his back is to her?!! This dog is truly dancing and just extremely talented!!!” added another.

Another said, “This dog is the most energetic and enthusiastic I've ever seen.”

Of course, Rhythm wasn't getting all the love. One person wrote, “I don't usually like dog acts, but this was impressive. Roni is very creative with what she does and obviously a great dancer herself and trainer.”

Another AGT performance by the duo also got rave reviews:

@agt

what can't @Ronisagi & Rhythm do!? watch #AGT on @NBC and streaming on @Peacock.

"Unbelievable…those steps omg."

"It's how the dog is ACTUALLY running around HAPPY!"

"That doggie deserves a million treats. Fantastic!"

"Yet I have to say to my dog sit 87 times before he actually sits, probably also from being tired of standing not because I said it."

Even when they're just rehearsing and dancing together at home, watching Rhythm and his human move together so harmoniously is truly incredible to watch:

Maybe we can’t get all dogs to perform quite on this level, but it does show us just how amazing man’s best friend really is.

You can follow Roni Sagi and Rhythm on Instagram.

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People swear by the unusual 'Solid Snake' conversation trend to conquer social anxiety

It's actually an easy Japanese active listening trick.

Canva Photos & Konami

People have found a really great active listening technique in a super strange place.

There is an art to being a good listener. Physically using your ears to hear what someone is saying, and your brain to process it, is only part of the battle. You also have to show the person you're talking to that you're listening and that you care. Asking questions is a great way to keep the conversation flowing and let your talking partner know you're engaged. But what if you're socially anxious, shy, or just can't think of anything to say? It's harder than it seems, especially when meeting new people!

The solution is easy. Just take a page out of Solid Snake's book. Who's Solid Snake? Just a former Green Beret, special ops solider, spy, assassin, and the protagonist of the popular Metal Gear Solid video games. You might wonder what the heck Solid Snake, aka David, knows about active listening. It turns out, quite a lot.

The "Solid Snake conversation method" is taking the world by storm. It's part trend, part meme, and 100% effective.

 conversation tips, social anxiety, small talk, socializing, etiquette, politeness, introvert, video games Solid Snake is here to help your social anxiety!  Giphy  

You don't need to know anything about video games to understand where the method comes from. Suffice it to say, Metal Gear Solid is a plot-heavy game series, full of cut-scenes that feature lots of dialogue and exposition.

It's become a bit of a joke in the gaming world that Snake, a man of few words, tends to fall back on one particular conversational technique over and over: He repeats, or echoes, bits of what the other characters say. It adds emphasis to important points, creates good conversational pacing, and allows the plot and dialogue to continue on smoothly.

Here's a (made up) example:

"Snake, we've got to get the blueprints!"

"The blueprints?"

"Yes, the bad guys are constructing a devastating bomb!"

"A bomb?"

"Indeed! You'll find the prototype in that bunker over there."

"A bunker?"

You get the idea. You can watch it in action here.


  - YouTube  www.youtube.com  

Why does this random video game character speak in this strange cadence? And why are people stealing it to use in real life?

You might think this dialogue is just a clunky tool for exposition or the result of bad writing, but you'd be wrong!

The Metal Gear Solid games are written and developed in Japan by a team led by legendary developer Hideo Kojima. Though translated into English and created in part for an American audience, the games feature a lot of bits and pieces of Japanese culture.

Frequent repetition and conversational echoes are extremely commonplace in Japanese. It's part of a polite active listening technique called "Aizuchi," which refers to frequent interjections to show interest, engagement, reassurance, and politeness.

Aizuchi includes interjecting with words or phrases (or their equivalents) like "I get it," "Yeah," "Really?" or even repeating back parts of the original speaker's words, a la Solid Snake.

According to Niko Smith at FluentU, "Perhaps you already use some of these interjections in conversation. While your friend is [telling you a story]... you might nod a few times or throw in a surprised 'No way!' or 'What happened next?' [Aizuchi] works in a similar way, but it’s more relentless. As the listener in a conversation, you might find yourself doing just as much talking as the speaker."

Smith adds that in America, young people are often taught specifically not to interrupt or speak while someone else is talking. In Japan, doing so frequently—in the right way—is a sign of respect and interest.

Better yet, Aizuchi doesn't require the listener to be particularly brilliant in conversation, charismatic, or creative. Even socially awkward people, or anyone who clams up in social situations, can muster a few polite interjections!

This technique exists outside of Japanese culture, too. In fact, it's a well-known wat to keep conversations flowing effortlessly, give you time to think about what you're going to say, and make your conversation partner feel heard and appreciated.

It's no surprise that people familiar with the game have been trying the technique in real life for years. In 2023, a viral 4chan post helped popularize the idea, and more recently a (now deleted) post on X went super viral referencing how effective the "Solid Snake conversation method" is for meeting new people.

 

The technique is hitting home with young people, especially gamers and the chronically-online, which makes for a really productive and much-needed discussion.

Gen Z has grown up with social media taking the place of many in-person interactions, screens everywhere, and of course, the COVID years. All of these factors affect the way they communicate with each other, especially in real life:

Maddy Mussen writes for The Standard, "Gen Z slang is all about shutting people out. It’s an inside joke, the more unintelligible the better. It’s in keeping with its etymology. When your whole modus operandi is being exclusionary, it doesn’t make for a lot of meaningful conversation."

It would be an unfair blanket generalization to say young people only speak in brainrot and have no idea how to operate in the real world. But Gen Z is racked with social anxiety to a far greater degree than previous generations. They need all the tools and practice they can get when it comes to operating in the real world and speaking to people they don't know well.

If they, or anyone else, can take a useful tip from their favorite video game character, there's nothing wrong with that at all.

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40 years later, people have a very different opinion on how 'Pretty in Pink' should have ended

It's not all about Duckie.

Canva

Some still ponder Duckie or Blane.

What about prom, Blane? That was a very serious question in 1986 and it still stands today. What…about…prom? Of course, this riveting line (beautifully delivered with pure teenage angst by Molly Ringwald's Andie to Andrew McCarthy's Blane) is from the 80s teen dramedy Pretty in Pink. Written by John Hughes, the king of Gen X cinema (even though he, himself, was a Boomer) and directed by Howard Deutch, this movie had everything: hats, Annie Potts and yes, Duckie.

As we get closer to the 40th anniversary of its release, some still argue about that ending. Spoilers ahead. To sum up the plot: Andie, a senior in an affluent Illinois high school, was best friends with a funny oddball called Duckie, played by Jon Cryer. They both lived on the proverbial "wrong side of the tracks," so when popular hottie Blane took an interest in her, she fell hard.

(Note: Blane's library computer trick before there were barely computers was the love bomb of all love bombs.)

  A scene from the film Pretty in Pink.  www.youtube.com, David Gibson, Paramount Pictures 

Against all odds, they fall in love and Duckie is super jealous. Blane asks Andie to prom but then succumbs to peer pressure (mainly from his friend Steff, played villainously by James Spader) and breaks it off. Andie won't be defeated so she sews together material her sweet dad (Harry Dean Stanton) finds for her and makes the ugliest prom dress of all time. She goes to the prom with Duckie, and when Blane sees the ugly prom dress, he changes his mind and professes his love. They kiss in the rain. (Note: The dress was so awful, Molly Ringwald herself has discussed it, openly.)

 James Spader, Pretty in Pink, 80s, movies James Spader in Pretty in Pink.  Giphy Paramount Pictures 

That's pretty much it. When I saw this as a tween, I cried and wondered where my Blane was. As Andie entered the dance hall with OMD's "If You Leave" underscoring her anxiety, I felt every centimeter of her heartbeat. And when Blane told her he loved her, none of my friends ever once questioned that THEY should be together.

It was the 80s, after all, and it was a true teen love story. But, as many now know, it wasn't supposed to end that way. Originally, Andie DID choose Duckie, but when they showed it to a test audience, they hated it so much that the whole cast had to come in for reshoots.

  - YouTube  www.youtube.com  

As years went on, some changed their minds and came to Duckie's defense. That's who she should have chosen, many said - the best friend with a heart of gold. But not so fast, says a somewhat recent Reddit post. In the subreddit r/80s, someone asked, "Should Andie have ended up with Duckie?"

The answers are thoughtful and somewhat surprising. Many on the thread think the reshoot got it right. The idea that she would be pestered into winding up with the guy she wasn't attracted to upset some commenters. "This is what it comes down to for me. You can’t force attraction, and she did not like him like that."

Another shares, "Duckie was weird, she was totally out of his league, and she had goals and aspirations in life. He didn't appear to have a job or any future prospects for goals in his life. Things still turned out great for him though. Duckie ended up with 'Duckette' Kristy Swanson."

 duckie, jon cryer, kristy swanson, pretty in pink movie Duckie gets chosen in Pretty in Pink.  Giphy  

One person notably points out that had Robert Downey Jr. taken the role of Duckie, there might have been more chemistry. "Nice to see that even a big actor like John Cryer can get friend-zoned. Also interesting to think that had RDJ been cast as planned as Ducky (sic) the original ending may have been left."

And this Redditor went all in: "I will defend her decision to go with Blane to the end. I don't know how anyone else's high school worked but in mine if one of the Chosen Ones/In Crowd picked someone like Andie to date, there's no way in hell that the Andie-like person would choose Duckie over the Chosen Ones/In Crowd person. It just wouldn't happen, not in that era anyway. Of course there could be & were exceptions, but if you were one of the Unwashed Masses & someone from the Cool Clique showed you interest you'd totally ditch the Unwashed Masses for the Cool Kids."

 Molly Ringwald, prom dress, Pretty in pink, movies, John Hughes Molly Ringwald in her Pretty in Pink prom dress.  Giphy Paramount Pictures 

Of course, there's the point of view that she should/could have chosen neither of those two. "Neither one. Duckie wasn’t her type and Blane was a sh---y person. He can say 'I always believed in you' but that is horse crap."

Regardless of who she should have chosen, perhaps we can all agree that Blane is not a name - it's an appliance.

@johnhughesmovies

BLANE? HIS NAME IS BLANE? That's a major appliance, that's not a name! 😭 #prettyinpink #duckie #prettyinpinkmovie #johnhughesmovie #johnhughes #mollyringwald

 
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Mom sends teen son to his first solo doctor's visit. His 'frantic' texts to her are so real.

Hilariously relatable for all of us who were once not-yet-adults.

Photo credit: Canva

Filling out forms by yourself for the first time is an adulting milestone.

It's easy to poke fun of young people complaining about "adulting," but in truth, everyone runs the How To Do All The Grown-Up Things gauntlet at some point. Some adult things we pick up intuitively, some things we figure out through trial and error, and some things have to be explicitly taught. 

But there are some things that fall into the gap between what kids need to know and what parents think to teach them, and many of those things are found on forms at the doctor's office. A viral post from a mom sharing texts from her 17-year-old son on his first solo trip to the doctor provides a perfect illustration of that fact and it has people everywhere rolling.

@wisco_cheryl

#boymom #17 #adulting #doctor #text #funny #momsoftiktok #momlife #haha #humor #wisconsin #fyp #myson #funnymoments #momtok #momsover30 #momhumor #vibes #parentsoftiktok #dadsoftiktok

"My 17 year old went to the doctor alone for the first time," the post from @wisco_cheryl reads. "Here are the frantic texts I got…he barely survived."

With "I'm Just a Kid" by Simple Plan playing in the background, we see a series of texts from the son:

"What do I even say when I get there"

"What's my social security number"

"What's DOB"

"Nevermind I got it"

"They gave me so many papers to write on"

"They're gonna touch my nustack"

"Nvm fault alarm" (He meant "false alarm.")

And for her part, Mom responded with a half dozen laughing emojis followed up by a hand and peanut emojis.

 laugh emoji, cry laughing Joy Laughing GIF by Biteable  Giphy  

The son's texts are funny in part because they're totally to be expected. Seriously, at some point, you run across acronyms like DOB for the first time—how are you supposed to know what it means? Maybe you figure out by context, or maybe you have to ask, but it's not like that's something they teach you in school. And the social security number? At some point, every American has to commit their social security number to memory, but you just don't until you do.

And that's just the basic stuff. Forms can be legitimately confusing beyond that. Heck, I have my own adult children and I still find myself baffled by questions on forms at the doctor's office sometimes. What the heck does co-insurance even mean? Do I have it? No idea. I don't think I do, but maybe I'm wrong? Insurance details remain a mystery decades into adulthood.

So naturally, a teen who is just starting to walk the path of adulthood is going to have a million questions, and it's truly fortunate when young people have parents they're able to text and ask all their "silly questions" when needed.

 young adults, transitioning to adulthood, mentorship Young people need adults to help them figure things out without judgment.Photo credit: Canva

With compassionate hilarity, people in the comments shared their own examples of not-quite-adult mishaps from their lives and their kids. It did not disappoint:

"At 21 I said my occupation was white and it still keeps me up at night. I'm 32."

"My son text me 'what's my maiden name' for the application for a job."

"While at urgent care, my son wrote 'mom' on the line asking for his primary care provider."

"My brother asked my mom when his last menstrual cycle was when he went to the doctors by himself for the first time."

"One time kid i hired back in the day filled out 'Next of Kin: Mom' and then 'Relationship: Good' on a onboarding packet. lol."

"My son when asked if he had the chicken pox shot 'I don't think so I'm not around chickens' 😂😂😂😂"

 chickens, dancing chickens, chicken pox shot The chicken pox shot has nothing to do with actual chickens.  Giphy GIF by Black Women Love Dogs 

"I help my dad raise my siblings (5) . when my brother was 17 he went to see his primary. she told him that he had sinusitis. he came home crying thinking it was cancer 🤣🤣🤣🤣"

"When I was buying my first car, they asked for my insurance and I handed them my health insurance card💀still haunts me to this day. My dad was so embarrassed lol"

"When I applied for a job at 16 for the skills area I wrote 'I can do the splits' I was applying for a job at the mall"

"My teens act like they know everything, until it’s time to fill paperwork. 🤣🤣🤣"

 doctor's visit, doctor's office, going to the doctor Sometimes teens need a little help as they're transitioning into adulthood.Photo credit: Canva

But one doctor's office worker had the best response of all:

"As someone who works in a drs office I’m always so proud of the teens. You can tell they’re nervous but they do such a good job 😊."

That's what we love to see—an acknowledgment that these young folks are doing alright as they learn the million little things they need to learn to go out on their own in the world. Here's to the parents and other grown-ups who remember what it was like to not know things and help the kids out, even when their questions might seem silly to us.

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