+
upworthy
Family

Mom shares blunt truth by perfectly explaining why kids 'don't owe their parents' anything

Mom shares blunt truth by perfectly explaining why kids 'don't owe their parents' anything
via ItsMe_ LisaP / TikTok

Most people would rank their parents among the most important and closest relationships in their lives. But how many of these relationships are rooted in feelings of guilt for being cared for as children versus a genuine feeling of love and respect?

How many children are held back in life because they feel obliged to remain obedient to an authoritarian parent well into adulthood?

Lisa Pontius, a mother on TikTok, has caused a stir on the platform by asking people to reconsider their relationships with their parents. Even boldly proclaiming that kids "Don't owe their parents" anything.


Pontius is a former private chef from New York who moved to South Carolina with her husband to become a full-time stay-at-home mother of two.

In a video that's been seen over five million times, Pontius argues that it's wrong for parents to guilt their kids into thinking they owe them a certain type of relationship as adults. The question came about after she made a video discussing the importance of setting boundaries with her own parents.

"Here's what's going to piss people off — children don't owe their parents a certain kind of relationship. And depending on the parent they might not owe them respect either, because that is reciprocal," she says in the video.

She believes parents shouldn't expect anything from their children because that's part of a job they chose. "You're not loving and providing for your children with the expectation that they will blindly obey and do whatever you say as adults," she says.

Pontius says that part of being a healthy adult is to reconsider one's relationship with their parents. She also says that children shouldn't feel they owe their parents anything for raising them because that's just "parenting" which they "signed up for."


@itsme_lisap

Already anticipating the Karen’s in the comments #parenting #parentsoftiktok #parentchildrelationship #respect #boundaries

On the other hand, she believes that parents who are emotionally healthy shouldn't have to worry too much about their relationships with their adult children. "Honestly, if you're raising your kids well and you're an emotionally mature person, you don't want them to blindly just accept things that are not good for them," Pontius says.

Nobody chose to be born or decided how they were raised. Therefore, why should anyone feel that they owe a debt to their parents? You're supposed to take care of your kids. Nobody deserves to take a victory lap or request special treatment because they took responsibility for their offspring.

However, many of us get trapped in unhealthy parent-child relationships because we think we owe our parents something and they try to take advantage.

In the end, Pontius believes it's all about setting appropriate boundaries.

"Boundaries can be small things, like asking someone to call before coming over or asking visitors to not kiss your new baby," she told Buzzfeed. "There can also be bigger boundaries, but the goal is the ability to maintain a relationship that doesn't compromise your mental health or happiness."

Whether you agree with Pontius or not, her video is a reminder for all of us to seriously consider our primary relationships and to examine whether they are based on genuine affection or a feeling of obligation.

Community

How to end hunger, according to the people who face it daily

Here’s what people facing food insecurity want you to know about solving the hunger problem in America

True

Even though America is the world’s wealthiest nation, about 1 in 6 of our neighbors turned to food banks and community programs in order to feed themselves and their families last year. Think about it: More than 9 million children faced hunger in 2021 (1 in 8 children).

In order to solve a problem, we must first understand it. Feeding America, the nation’s largest domestic hunger-relief organization, released its second annual Elevating Voices: Insights Report and turned to the experts—people experiencing hunger—to find out how this issue can be solved once and for all.

Here are the four most important things people facing hunger want you to know.

Keep ReadingShow less
Pets

Family brings home the wrong dog from daycare until their cats saved the day

A quick trip to the vet confirmed the cats' and family's suspicions.

Family accidentally brings wrong dog home but their cats knew

It's not a secret that nearly all golden retrievers are identical. Honestly, magic has to be involved for owners to know which one belongs to them when more than one golden retriever is around. Seriously, how do they all seem have the same face? It's like someone fell asleep on the copy machine when they were being created.

Outside of collars, harnesses and bandanas, immediately identifying the dog that belongs to you has to be a secret skill because at first glance, their personalities are also super similar. That's why it's not surprising when one family dropped off their sweet golden pooch at daycare and to be groomed, they didn't notice the daycare sent out the wrong dog.

See, not even their human parents can tell them apart because when the swapped dog got home, nothing seemed odd to the owners at first. She was freshly groomed so any small differences were quickly brushed off. But this accidental doppelgänger wasn't fooling her feline siblings.

Keep ReadingShow less
Family

15 best colostrum supplements

Invigorate your journey to optimal health with these wellness-enhancing colostrum supplements.

Editor's Note: Upworthy earns a percentage of revenue from items purchased on this list.


Embarking on a journey toward enhanced well-being is a rewarding endeavor, and when it comes to unlocking nature's potential, colostrum supplements stand as remarkable allies. Did you know that the global colostrum market is projected to experience a growth of over 3.5% in the coming years, a testament to the increasing recognition of its incredible benefits? Moreover, scientific interest in colostrum's immune-boosting properties has led to a surge in research publications, with a remarkable 37% rise observed in the last five years alone. As we delve into the realm of wellness-enhancing supplements, this article unveils an illuminating guide to the 15 best colostrum supplements, offering a chance to embrace vitality and invigorate the journey to optimal health.

15 best colostrum supplements

  1. Elm & Rye Colostrum Supplements
  2. Swanson Ultra High Immunoglobulin Colostrum Supplement
  3. California Gold Nutrition, Colostrum
  4. ARMRA Colostrum Immune Revival Unflavored
  5. Mt. Capra Goat Milk Colostrum
  6. PipingRock Ultra Colostrum Quick Release Capsules
  7. NOW Foods, Colostrum Powder
  8. Nature’s Sunshine Colostrum Capsules
  9. Ancestral Supplements Grass Fed Beef Colostrum Supplement
  10. WONDERCOW Colostrum Powder Supplement
  11. Symbiotics Colostrum Chewables
  12. Brain Basics Ultra-Pure Colostrum
  13. Surthrival: Colostrum Powder Capsules
  14. Double Wood Supplements Colostrum Supplement Capsules
  15. Pure Velvet Colostrum Powder
Keep ReadingShow less
Sandra Maria/Youtube, Official Lives & Music Videos/Youtube

You can't not sing this song.

The music of Queen has a profound visceral effect on everyone. Few pieces of art can cause complete strangers to put aside their differences and come together in song, but by golly, “Bohemian Rhapsody” is one of them. It would be cheesy if it weren’t so absolutely beautiful.

This pertains even to non-English-speaking countries, it appears. Recently, thousands of Harry Styles concertgoers in Warsaw, Poland, began cheering as those iconic beginning piano notes penetrated the air.
Keep ReadingShow less
Photo by Long Truong on Unsplash
woman in white sleeveless dress kissing man in blue dress shirt


"It may be the most important thing we do in life; learn how to love and be loved."

At least, that's according to Harvard psychologist and researcher Rick Weissbourd.

He's been collecting data on the sex and love habits of young people for years through surveys, interviews, and even informal conversation — with teens and the important people in their lives.

Through it all, one thing has been abundantly clear:

"We spend enormous amount of attention helping parents prepare their kids for work and school," Weissbourd says. "We do almost nothing to prepare them for the tender, tough, subtle, generous, focused work of developing mature healthy relationships. I'm troubled by that."

Keep ReadingShow less

Mom shares PSA on about being a sports mom while also working

Being a mom can be challenging enough, but when you add in working full time and kids activities, it feels like you need a few clones to help you out. Recently we signed our youngest up for soccer, he's 5-years-old and happens to be ten years younger than his closest sibling, so I've done the sports stuff.

At one point I was working full-time while my daughter took tap, ballet and jazz while also on a soccer team and my two older boys played soccer, baseball and football. We rarely saw the inside of our home unless it was to sleep, I'm not even sure I knew how my stove worked during those years. Now here we are starting all over again.

So when Mo, a mom running the TikTok page Rex & Mo posted a video ranting about how impossible it feels to add organized activities for kids into the mix, parents everywhere related, myself included.

Keep ReadingShow less
@mychal3ts/TikTok

This is "the power of the library"

Editor's Note: This story discusses suicide. If you are having thoughts about taking your own life, or know of anyone who is in need of help, the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline is a United States-based suicide prevention network of over 200+ crisis centers that provides 24/7 service via a toll-free hotline with the number 9-8-8. It is available to anyone in suicidal crisis or emotional distress.


Libraries aren’t just a place to score free books. For many, they provide safe refuge.

This secondary offering has lately been overshadowed by political controversy, as there has been a laser focus from conservatives on the types of literature libraries provide, especially titles that pertain to LGBTQ and racial topics.

But one librarian’s retelling of a life saving encounter reminds us of how essential these community spaces really are—and it has nothing to do with books at all.

Keep ReadingShow less