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Pop Culture

Jane Fonda and Rita Moreno champion the perks of aging: 'You get better at everything.'

The two actresses are having the time of their lives.

80 for brady, jane fonda, rita moreno, aging
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Jane Fonda and Rita Moreno co-star in "80 for Brady"

Take it from the ultimate leading ladies themselves, getting older can also mean getting better.

In the upcoming sports comedy “80 for Brady,” legendary stars Jane Fonda, Sally Field, Lily Tomlin and Rita Moreno play best friends and devoted fangirls to Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, who are hell-bent on watching their favorite football player in the Super Bowl. The story was inspired by a gang of real-life besties from 2017.

As the cast has been promoting the film, it’s been one hilarious story after another. From Fonda cracking Sally Field up over a naughty football pun to Moreno sharing flirty locker stories, it’s clear that for these ladies the fun has only just begun.

"I think as you get older, you get better at almost everything," Fonda shared in an interview with AARP. “I love my work more than ever, and it feels more balanced now. I take things in stride more than I once did. Things are a little simpler.”

The “Grace and Frankie” actress has previously shared that even her sex life had improved over the years as she learned how to better understand and communicate her needs.

“Women, I think, tend to get better because they lose their fear of saying what they need,” she said. “We waste way too much time not wanting to say, ‘Wait a minute, hold it, hold it, no, no, no. Slow down, and a little to the left.’ We don’t want to do that…But when we get older it’s like, ‘No, I know what I want. Give me what I want.’” she told Andy Cohen during his SiriusXM radio show, “Andy Cohen Live."

Moreno seconded Fonda’s statement in the AARP interview, saying “I will confess that I wake up smiling.” She added that when looking in the mirror she would sometimes find herself taken aback at all the years that have gone by, but it doesn’t take away any confidence. “I’ll put on some makeup and I’m absolutely amazing,” she quipped.

It’s certainly a refreshing take. Generally speaking, American culture often views youth as the holy grail of happiness, with the false assumption that somehow joy is a limited resource that is slowly siphoned off beginning at the age of 30. In fact, it’s not only joy that supposedly fades, but beauty, health and overall value.

But as many older people will tell you, nothing could be further from the truth. You actually get more self-assured, more powerful and (perhaps most important of all) more present to actually look around and appreciate the blessings surrounding you. All in all, it doesn’t sound like a bad deal.

Thankfully, conversations like these are becoming more widespread, helping us to remember that in many ways, our best days are still ahead of us.

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Joy

A woman accidentally said, 'Love you!' to an important client. His response was perfect.

He even followed up with a heartwarming e-mail.

Photo credit: Canva

Saying "I love you!" by accident is one of life's most cringe moments.

For many of us, telling our friends and family that we love them is second nature. Every time someone leaves the house, "Love you!" Before bed at night, "Love you!" Getting off a call with them, "Love you!"

That's all well and good until that sweetly ingrained habit spills over into your work life. Especially when you're talking to an important client, where the boundaries of professional conduct are particularly important to uphold. (Do you feel the cringe coming?)

I Love You Elf GIF by MOODMANGiphy

A woman shared an oh-so-human story about absent-mindedly telling a client she loved him, and his thoughtful response has people cheering.

"Accidentally said 'Love you!' at the end of a call with an important client yesterday," wrote a Reddit user. "I heard him giggle as I hung up, and I was mortified. Today, I saw he emailed me this:"

The email began, "Hey—Just wanted to say that I didn't mean to laugh at you when you accidentally signed off on our call with a 'love you.' I just found it funny because I've definitely done that before, and I know it happens."

Okay, phew, he understood that the laughing was mortifying and he wasn't bothered by the "love you." But then he added the absolute best thing he could have said about the situation:

"I'm glad you have enough love in your life that that response comes naturally. If anything, you should be proud of that. :)"

Then he mercifully resumed their professional conversation. "Have a great weekend! We'll follow up about my call with Chris on Wednesday, as discussed."

embarrassing story, saying I love you on accident, workplace stories, professional communication"Love you!" Oops.Photo credit: Canva

He didn't just ignore the elephant in the room and let it hang over her like an awkward cloud. He put her at ease, letting her know he's done it before and it happens and is no big deal. But then he took it a step further, adding a deeper human layer to the moment by acknowledging the fact that the words flowing so automatically and easily for her meant she was surrounded by love.

The client's emotional intelligence and thoughtful response warmed people's hearts.

"What a great and respectful response. He is completely right, it’s such a beautiful thing to have that much love in your life that it comes out naturally."

"You work with good people."

"Honestly, this made my day 😂 It's so wholesome how they responded. Shows that a little kindness (even accidental) always leaves a good impression!"

"Such a classy response. Made you feel at ease while staying professional and moving the conversation forward."

"Green flags from that client."

Green Flag GIF by The Last Talk ShowGiphy

People also shared their own similar experiences with blurting out accidental "love you"s and it was a veritable love-fest:

"I told my supervisor I loved her at the end of our weekly touch point call - she chuckled and said she loved me too. We shared a good laugh. I am happy to see empathy from a random human, it is much needed."

"I said 'love you' to my new boss at labcorp when she called me to tell me I passed my drug test. Same thing, hanging up, not thinking, she gave me my results and my start date to come in for orientation and I ended the call with 'bye love you!'"

"Back in the day I straight up called one of my bosses mom. It was so embarrassing I almost died."

"A surprising number of people have done this at least once. Happens when you’re distracted and tired. My ex husband (a prosecutor) accidentally ended a phone call with 'I love you' when talking to a rural county sheriff in the middle of the night."

Embarrassed Hide GIF by florGiphy

"I had a coworker say 'love you,' just as we were about to hang up. There was an awkward pause, clearly neither of us had hung up, then he added, 'Don’t tell my wife.' We both laughed and finally disconnected."

"I did that with my ex husband last Thursday, we both burst out laughing lol. Happily we get along great and he and his fiancée are attending my wedding next week."

"Was on phone with my boss right after he had called his wife. He ended the call with "love you." Had so much fun telling him that while I cared for him, I didn't think it was love."

Embarrassing moments don't have to ruin your day—in fact, when handled like this client, they can turn into beautiful moments of human connection. This kind of relatability, empathy, and emotional intelligence makes us all feel better about our shared humanity, oopsies and all.

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Movies

One item from 'When Harry Met Sally' bonds Gen Z and Boomers, and it's probably not what you'd think

TikTokers branded it a "winter essential."

via Canva, Castlerock Entertainment
Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal crouch down.

Billy Crystal wasn't the first in line to play Harry Burns in the 1989 rom-comWhen Harry Met Sally. Not by a long shot. In fact, director Rob Reiner considered Albert Brooks, Tom Hanks, Harrison Ford, Michael Keaton, Richard Dreyfuss, and Bill Murray for the part before him. Incidentally, according Business Insider, Albert Brooks thought it was too much like a "Woody Allen film," and Hanks believed it to be too "lightweight."

Crystal, who was best friends with Reiner, wound up exceeding expectations to pull out an iconic, grumpy performance that even the most cynical person could love.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Well, not everyone loved it. Just last year, a tweet went viral that revealed many Gen Z-ers had a real tough time with Billy Crystal as a leading man. And they weren't being especially shy about it. Emily Lefroy writes for Daily Mail, "The debate began after X user Zoe Rose Bryant responded to a post asking users to share the 'romcom scene that literally changed the trajectory of your life.'" Zoe then posted a clip from the Nora Ephron-penned classic and wrote, "You simply can't beat the blueprint."

The comment section disagreed, with many claiming Billy wasn't attractive enough for Meg Ryan's Sally. Ouch.

In the subreddit r/unpopularopinion, someone posted a similar sentiment claiming in part, "Harry's character is very unattractive, largely because he is a rude and condescending person. Sally is beautiful but annoying. The romantic scenes are cringy, mostly because Harry is such a jerk and so unappealing as a romantic lead."

This young Millennial writes, "I just tried to watch it for the first time (I'm 32), and I just couldn't do it. It's such a slog. I made it to right after they sleep together, and I had to stop it to take a break and watch something else… Harry is a d#$k and Sally just sucks."

They didn't like the deli orders either. "The way she places orders at restaurants isn't quirky, it's just awful." And they even had a note for the music composer: "Also, why is this movie so quiet? It might be an '80s thing, but the lack of a background score makes the scenes feel so awkward and cringe. I don't want to hear the click-clack of their shoes when they walk. And I certainly don't want to hear how wet their kissing is."

When Harry Met Sally, Castlerock Entertainment, Iconic movie scene, Meg RyanMeg Ryan sits at a diner in "When Harry Met Sally."Giphy

This Redditor agrees: "Honestly, I think it's a movie for Boomers who thought it was groundbreaking to show a man and a woman trying to be friends."

As if a Boomer just heard their name and perked up, they emphatically enter the chat, explaining, "The arrogant, self-centered character trait is the key issue! They’re young and dumb! Just like I was and practically everyone else I know when they were young. I’m in my sixties now. Young people mostly go through life with their heads shoved far up their a$es. Both sexes. It takes time and hard experience to pull their heads out. I don’t know if you’re young—don’t take this as a personal insult. But Harry is a spot-on portrayal of myself and Sally is my wife."

There's more. In a different thread entitled "What exactly is so amazing about When Harry Met Sally," a Millennial writes, "I watched it recently for the first time. I was born after it was released if that matters—if it was considered a movie of its time. I just don't really see the magic in it… I just don't really feel a yearning for Harry and Sally to fall in love."

This time, fellow Redditors really take the time to teach the OP, with one even including a character analysis for both Harry and Sally. Once the OP understands that Harry is like "this generation's Chandler Bing," they get a better overall grasp of the role, but still don't love the film.

One thing that does unite Gen Z with their older counterparts? Harry's sweater. Lydia Hawken writes for Mail Online that "TikTokers have rebranded the cable knit jumper (sweater) a 'winter essential.'"

Maybe we'll never prove that men and women can just be friends. But we do know that fashion trends can cross the generational aisle in the best of ways.

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Pets

Woman builds an elaborate hotel in her yard for stray cats to stay cozy through the winter

People are calling it "Hotel Catifornia" and "The Fur Seasons."

Images via Canva

A woman in China provides a cozy home for stray cats in her neighborhood.

When winter comes around, people may wonder how stray animals stay warm and safe. Stray cats in particular are highly adaptable creatures and their home is the great outdoors, so most of the time there's not much that people need to do to protect them. But when temperatures dip to dangerous levels, caring humans naturally want to make sure strays have a place to go to get out of the harsh elements.

One woman has taken that desire to a whole new level with an elaborate cat apartment she built for the many stray cats in her neighborhood. We're not just talking about a shelter–it's like luxury hotel living for her feline friends. The apartment has multiple rooms, cushy blankets that get taken out and cleaned, and even a temperature-controlled water source so they're always able to find drinking water in frigid temps.

Check this out:

The woman who built the apartment actually lives in China and was sharing her videos on TikTok, but it seems her account has since been deactivated. This hasn't stopped people from talking about her and her impressive project, though. This thread on TikTok contains updates about the cat hotel from people finding and reposting the adorable story.

Welcome to the Meowtel Catifornia

Of course, the clever hotel jokes and puns started rolling in first thing:

'Welcome to the hotel catifornia."

"Such a lovely place."

"They can check out any time but they won't ever leave ^^"

"I prefer Hotel Calicofornia."

"Meowriott."

"Given my skill, mine would be more like Meowtel 6."

"Pawliday Inn.'

"The Fur Seasons."'

"Meowne Plaza."

People loved seeing the care and ingenuity she put into the "meowtel," as well as how happy the cats seem with the arrangement. In fact, some people were sure their own house cats would move out just to go live in this kind of cat commune.

"My cat just looked at me and sighed…"

"All the neighbours be looking for their cats and they’ve bailed to live at the kitty motel."

"They’d pack their little bags and move in without a second thought."

"They wouldn't even wait to pack their bags."

"Alright Carol it’s been real but we’re gonna head out. Found a great deal on a luxury apartment so yanno… take care."


Cats live where they want when they want

cats, stray cats, pet cats, felines, kittiesKitten snuggled in a person's arms. Image via Canva.

Those people may have been joking, but several others shared that their cats really did ditch them to go live with neighbors who had more desirable living situations.

"I’ve had two cats do this. One was annoyed at our second dog’s puppy energy so she moved in with an older lady a street over. We used to see her all the time until she passed. The other missed our kids being little so she moved next door where there’s a little girl. We talked to both neighbors and said if they get sick of them to let us know and we’ll take them back but both lived the rest of their lives with their new families."

"One of our cats moved next door because he loves children and wanted to be with the little girl next door. Because it’s a very small village, he goes to the school most days to wait for her and they come home together. School is 3 buildings away."

"We had a cat do the same thing about 20 years ago. She hated the barks of our new puppy and would put her paw on his mouth to try and stop it. One day, she slipped outside and I found her a month later, two streets over, hanging with a couple who didn’t have a dog. They said she just showed up at the door and moved in. I gave them all her cat food and hope she had a nice quiet life."

Is it a bad idea to feed and shelter stray cats?

cats, stray cats, feeding cats, feral cats, shelter catsCats eating kibble on the street.Image via Canva

People have differing opinions about whether it's good to feed stray cats or not, as cats can cause problems for local wildlife and it's not great to encourage an increasing stray cat population. According to Catster, in the United States alone, an estimated four billion birds and 22 billion mammals (such as mice, voles, rabbits, and shrews) are killed annually by both domestic and stray cats. In Canada, cats are the number one of killer of birds, killing "between 100 and 350 million birds every year." These numbers are staggering, but the bird and small mammal populations can be protected if stray cats are cared for responsibly: namely, spaying and neutering those in your area to cut down on the population and finding homes for those who are friendly and comfortable with humans.

According to the Feral Cat Coalition of Oregon, here are the best practices for feral and stray cats:

- Spay/neuter to prevent additional litters

- Find homes for friendly cats

- Feed outdoor cats on a schedule

- Remove food & dishes when they are done eating

- Pick up scraps and keep the feeding area tidy

- Provide fresh water

- Provide a warm place for the cats to sleep

So, go ahead and care for those kitties and keep them warm through the winter—just make sure they can't make any more kittens.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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Friendship

Mom sends life-changing text to her son's friend who stood by him during severe depression

Watching your child suffer from mental illness is incredibly difficult.

Photo credit: Canva

Depression can be isolating and take a toll on friendships.

Any parent who has had a child struggling with mental health knows how helpless it can make you feel. You want to fix it, to kiss the boo-boo and make it all better, but you can't. Finding and getting the help your child needs, whether they're 7 or 27, can be a long, frustrating process, and seeing your kid suffering in the meantime is incredibly difficult.

They say it takes a village, and that's especially true when mental health issues disrupt your child's life. Having other people love and support your loved one who is struggling is huge, whether it's other family members, community members, or friends. That's why a mom reaching out to her son's friend who had been by their side through a severe depression resonates with so many.

A person shared on Reddit that they had received a text from their friend's mom after the friend had been through a bout of depression. It read:


"This is _____'s mom. Just wanted to say thank you from the bottom of my heart for standing by my child through their toughest times. Seeing my child struggle was the most painful experience of my life. Your presence, patience, and support meant the world. You've been a true blessing and I'll forever be grateful to you as I can see my child smile again. May you always be surrounded by love, kindness and compassion you selflessly gave to my child. You have been a blessing in our lives."

Helping someone with depression is not easy, no matter who you are. Friends and family often don't know what to do and can end up distancing themselves or responding in a way that's not helpful. It's clear that the mom recognized this fact and expressing her gratitude is a beautiful way of acknowledging the difference this friend made.

depression, mental health, mental illness, support, friendship, hugHaving someone stay by your side through depression is a gift.Photo credit: Canva

People were moved by the mom's message and the evidence of the friend's staunch support.

"Oh 100% would uuuuugly-sob if I got a text like this! What a thoughtful acknowledgement and message of gratitude. Clearly, you are a wonderful and empathetic friend! 💕"

"I'm stifling back tears. I have no doubt that the loving treatment you gave this child was its own reward; however, this beautifully written note is touching and uplifting. Empathy and kindness should be acknowledged. You are both lovely and safe people. I can only wish you and your kids the best, and maybe a growing friendship. Kudos!"

"100% chance that their mom was ugly crying writing this. Experiencing suffering yourself is one thing, but the helplessness of watching your child suffer is excruciating. OP, thanks for being a ray of sunshine in stormy times for this family."

depression, mental health, mental illness, isolation, support, friendshipWatching your child struggle with mental health is painful.Photo credit: Canva

"Kinda like I am now. My Heart goes out to any mom who sees their child struggling, no matter what the age, and feel helpless. Then to have someone be able to provide support in a way that can only come from a friend and not a mom - it just wrecks me to think of how great of a gift it was."

"My adult son is struggling with depression. As a parent, it’s gut-wrenching. I mean, it’s harder for them than for me. But my heart is in a constant state of breaking."

"This clearly shows how you can be surrounded by the best people and still suffer from depression. If this parent shows this much love toward their child’s friend, I can only imagine how amplified it is toward their child who still had to work through it. What lovely people. I hope all involved are thriving."

It's a good reminder to do what we can for one another and to let people know when you see and appreciate their efforts for your loved ones. It truly takes a village for all of us to thrive.


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Education & Information

The 4 unspoken rules of conversation we all follow without thinking about it

They're known Grice's Maxims, and it's obvious when someone violates one of them.

Photo credit: Canva

How do we understand what we mean when we converse?

Talking to one another is one of the most basic things we do, and yet human communication is actually pretty weird when you think about it. We can't speak to everyone because none of us knows every one of the world's thousands of languages. We can say the exact same words but change their meaning simply by changing our tone of voice. Some people are avid, smooth conversationalists, and others are so anxious about social interactions that we need therapy to help us get through them.

Human conversation is complicated, no doubt. But oddly, there are some rules we all adhere to when we talk to one another that most of us aren't even aware of. These rules make conversations make sense and allow us to understand inferred or implied meanings, but we follow them so subconsciously that we probably don't recognize that we're doing it.

conversation, grice's maxims, communication, talking to someone, communicationWe follow Grice's Maxims without realizing it most of the time.Photo credit: Canva

These "rules" are known as Grice's Maxims, named for linguist and philosopher Paul Grice, who detailed these rules. Under the umbrella of the Cooperative Principle—meaning our shared understanding that conversation is meant to be a cooperative endeavor in which we strive to communicate effectively—Grice explained four maxims we all follow:

1. QUANTITY (be informative)

The quantity maxim leads us to be as informative as possible while not giving more detail than is needed.

2. QUALITY (be truthful)

The quality maxim means we tell the truth by default, not providing information that's false or lacking evidence.

3. RELATION (be relevant)

The relation maxim compels us to say things that are pertinent or related to the conversation.

4. MANNER (be clear)

The manner maxim means being brief and orderly in what we say, avoiding obscurity or ambiguity.

Tom Scott explains Grice's Maxims and gives examples of how they help us understand one another.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

For example, we use the term "vegan burgers" but not "vegan tomatoes" because "vegan" is not a necessary descriptor for tomatoes, which everyone knows are always vegan. That's Grice's first maxim of Quantity—give as much information as is required, but no more. Breaking this rule sounds strange.

We can see Grice's Maxims at work in the simple exchange in which one person says, "I'm out of petrol," and the other person says, "There's a garage down the street."

"Without context, just using the super literal, logical meaning of those sentences, there's no connection there," Scott explains. "Those are just two factual statements. But if you assume I'm trying to follow the cooperative principle, then you can automatically work out a lot more."

out of gas, out of petrol, need gas, gasoline, gas canA brief conversation about running out of gas illustrates Grice's Maxims.Photo credit: Canva

For instance, the relation maxim leads us to the conclusion that the garage probably has petrol. The quantity maxim means that "there's a garage down the street" is all you need to say to imply that you can push your car down the street, buy gas, and solve the problem of being on empty (a problem which was also implied in the first sentence, as Scott points out). The quality maxim assumes that both statements are true, and due to the manner maxim, we can assume that "garage" is just a dialectical term for a gas station.

Then Scott explained that the maxims can be violated or flouted. Violating a maxim is basically just lying and trying to deceive, but flouting these maxims can be done to say something without really saying it. He gave the example of a recommendation letter that is too brief and not informative enough, which implies that the person writing it has nothing to really recommend about the person.

What's fun about Grice's Maxims is the comedy that happens when the cooperative principle is not assumed and statements or questions are taken literally. Think of all the literal quips from "Airplane" or "The Naked Gun."

Quote I Am Serious GIF by Top 100 Movie Quotes of All TimeGiphy

People in the comments shared examples of exchanges that are taken literally instead of understanding the implied meaning, and it's hilarious.


"I'm out of petrol"

"That's good, it probably wasn't safe to be in it."


"Would you like something to drink?"

"What are my options?"

"Yes and no."


"Coffee or tea?"

"Coffee"

"Wrong, it's tea."


"I'm seeing stars."

"Did you see a doctor?"

"No, just stars."


"Hello, my name is Kevin without 'M'."

"But there is no 'M' in Kevin."

"That's what I said."


"What is your main flaw?"

"I correctly interpret the semantics of the questions, but I ignore their essence."

"Could you give an example?

"I could."


Some people pointed out that learning about these maxims could help neurodivergent people have easier conversations. Even though Scott says they aren't meant to be prescriptive, "do this" kinds of rules, knowing that they are inherent in social exchanges, is an important piece of the effective communication puzzle.

Isn't being human just fascinating?

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