The Tyrannosaurus rex — the tiny-armed, 40-foot-tall, seven-ton, jaw-chomping, lizard-bird-monster-god-of-doom — is the undisputed king of the dinosaurs.

But how exactly does one get to be the king of the dinosaurs?

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Well, thanks to a newly discovered relative of the famed "Jurassic Park" star, we now know the secret to T. rex's dino-success. And it's not all about its massive physical stats, after all.


Spoiler alert: It's lasers. GIF from "Dino-Riders."

You read that right: THEY DISCOVERED A NEW DINOSAUR!

It's called Timurlengia euotica, and yes, it's technically not new new because it's already been dead for a gazillion years, but that's beside the point 'cause it's a new freakin' dinosaur

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If somehow that's not exciting enough, it also fills in a glaring 20-million-year fossil gap in our overall dino-knowledge! Thanks, T. euot!

Yeahhhhh I guess "T. euot" doesn't sound nearly as cool as "T. rex," huh? Oh well, I tried. (Also that's an artist's rendering, in case that wasn't clear.) Photo by Mark Wilson/Getty Images.

It all started in Uzbekistan back in 2004, when a team of paleontologists found the fossil of a weird-lookin' braincase.

They were as intrigued by the grapefruit-sized bone lump as they were confused. Which is kind of how I feel whenever someone smart and science-y feels compelled to distinguish between the terms "braincase" and "skull."

GIF from "Meet the Robinsons."

The mysterious braincase was hidden away in storage — until 2014, when it caught the eye of Dr. Steve Brusatte, a T-rexpert from the University of Edinburgh.

"When I looked at it, it struck me really quickly that this looked like a tyrannosaur braincase," he told National Geographic. "Not exactly T. rex, much smaller; the same bones in a T. Rex would be bigger than a basketball."

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Specifically, it was missing some of the recesses and knobs that are standard on a T. rex braincase, and its ear canals were surprisingly long — evidence of incredible aural abilities.

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In fact, the braincase was remarkably reminiscent of Xiongguanlong, another recently discovered tyrannosaurid that predated the rex by about 60 million years. But whereas Xionggunlong was believed to be about the size of a human, Timurlengia euotica clocked in around 600 pounds and the size of a horse.

The tyrannosaurid family tree. Photo by Mark Wilson/Getty Images.

As Brusatte told CBS News:

Timurlengia "has an advanced brain. It has an ear with a very long cochlea, perfectly attuned to hearing low frequency sound. We used to think that those were the features of only the biggest tyrannosaurs, that those were things that evolved in the biggest tyrannosaurs in concert with the evolution of large size."

Note: This is not actually a GIF of a T. rex and T. euot nuzzling each other. GIF from "Walking With Dinosaurs."

You see, T. rex wasn't just a ginormous dino-dictator, ruling the Cretaceous with its teeny-tiny iron fists. It was also incredibly intelligent (for a dinosaur, anyway).

It had acute senses of sight, smell, and hearing, which gave it a leg up on the other predators roaming the land. And yes, it was also huge, which was obviously advantageous as well.

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But until this point, no one was really sure how it got there. How did it evolve to be a giant chompy monster that was also smarter than the average prehistoric lizard-bird?

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"It’s the head-first mode of evolution," said Hans-Dieter Sues, chair of the Department of Paleobiology at the Smithsonian's National Museum of Natural History, and one of the co-authors of the study that discovered the T. euotica. "The brains [are] for the operation, and then you develop the bulk."

Hans-Dieter Sues presenting evidence of the T. euotica. Photo by Mark Wilson/Getty Images.

Put another way: T. rex is evolutionary evidence for the power of brains before brawn. And T. euotica is the missing link that proves it.

That's right, kids: If you study hard and believe in yourselves, you too can become a T. rex someday! That's how science works, right? 

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That first car is a rite of passage into adulthood. Specifically, the hard-earned lesson of expectations versus reality. Though some of us are blessed with Teslas at 17, most teenagers receive a car that’s been … let’s say previously loved. And that’s probably a good thing, considering nearly half of first-year drivers end up in wrecks. Might as well get the dings on the lemon, right?

Of course, wrecks aside, buying a used car might end up costing more in the long run after needing repairs, breaking down and just a general slew of unexpected surprises. But hey, at least we can all look back and laugh.

My first car, for example, was a hand-me-down Toyota of some sort from my mother. I don’t recall the specific model, but I definitely remember getting into a fender bender within the first week of having it. She had forgotten to get the brakes fixed … isn’t that a fun story?

Jimmy Fallon recently asked his “Tonight Show” audience on Twitter to share their own worst car experiences. Some of them make my brake fiasco look like cakewalk (or cakedrive, in this case). Either way, these responses might make us all feel a little less alone. Or at the very least, give us a chuckle.

Here are 22 responses with the most horsepower:

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Mozart was known for his musical talent at a young age, playing the harpsichord at age 4 and writing original compositions at age 5. So perhaps it's fitting that a video of 5-year-old piano prodigy Alberto Cartuccia Cingolani playing Mozart has gone viral as people marvel at his musical abilities.

Alberto's legs can't even reach the pedals, but that doesn't stop his little hands from flying expertly over the keys as incredible music pours out of the piano at the 10th International Musical Competition "Città di Penne" in Italy. Even if you've seen young musicians play impressively, it's hard not to have your jaw drop at this one. Sometimes a kid comes along who just clearly has a gift.

Of course, that gift has been helped along by two professional musician parents. But no amount of teaching can create an ability like this.

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As a Gen X parent, it's weird to try to describe my childhood to my kids. We're the generation that didn't grow up with the internet or cell phones, yet are raising kids who have never known a world without them. That difference alone is enough to make our 1980s childhoods feel like a completely different planet, but there are other differences too that often get overlooked.

How do you explain the transition from the brown and orange aesthetic of the '70s to the dusty rose and forest green carpeting of the '80s if you didn't experience it? When I tell my kids there were smoking sections in restaurants and airplanes and ashtrays everywhere, they look horrified (and rightfully so—what were we thinking?!). The fact that we went places with our friends with no quick way to get ahold of our parents? Unbelievable.

One day I described the process of listening to the radio, waiting for my favorite song to come on so I could record it on my tape recorder, and how mad I would get when the deejay talked through the intro of the song until the lyrics started. My Spotify-spoiled kids didn't even understand half of the words I said.

And '80s hair? With the feathered bangs and the terrible perms and the crunchy hair spray? What, why and how?

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