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The Gen X 'stay at home mom' crisis is real, but what's the solution?

Some moms in their 40s feel like they were lied to about what their "resume gap" would mean.

Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash

40-something moms who stayed home to be with their kids are finding themselves in uncharted waters.

A few generations ago, parents had pretty clearly defined roles with the dad generally being the breadwinner and the mom being the homemaker and stay-at-home mother. Then, in 1848, the women's rights movement in the United States began with a powerful second wave coming in the 1960s and 70s, empowering women in the workplace, ushering in the era of two working parents, and producing an entire generation of "latchkey kids."

Now those Gen X latchkey kids are parenting Gen Z, with the pendulum of working motherhood having swung somewhat to the middle. We were raised to believe we could be anything we dreamed of being and that we didn't have to choose between being a mom and having a career. Gen X also became mothers during the heyday of parenting self-help books that impressed upon us the importance of attachment and hands-on childrearing, as well as the era of super-scheduled kids, whose activities alone require a full-time manager.

As a result, those of us in our 40s have raised our kids straddling two worlds—one where women can have all of the career success we desire and one where we can choose to be stay-at-home moms who run seemingly effortless households. At first, we were told we could have it all, but when the impossibility of that became clear, we were told, "Well, you can have it all, just not at the same time." But as many moms are finding as their kids start leaving the nest, even that isn't the full truth.

in 2023, a Facebook post by Karen Johnson, aka The 21st Century SAHM (short for "stay-at-home mom") nailed the reality many stay-at-home moms in their 40s are facing as they find themselves floundering with the glaring gap in their resumes.

"This is for all the moms in their 40s who put their careers on hold to do the SAHM thing because you knew you couldn't do both—career you loved and motherhood—and do both WELL, so you picked, saying to yourself, 'This is just for now and we'll see,'" Johnson wrote. "But now it's 15 years later and so much has changed in your career field that you know you can't go back. So really, when you 'took a break' all those years ago, you gave it up."

Johnson explained that yes, moms know they should be grateful for the time they've had with their kids. Most are. That's not the issue. Whether a woman chose to be a stay-at-home mom because she really wanted to or because childcare costs didn't work in the financial equation of the family, the transition out of it feels like completely uncharted waters.

"Okay, so you're looking for a 'career' with part-time hours and a 100% flexible schedule because you're still Mom-on-duty but you do have *just* enough hours during the day to reflect on the fact that you *do* have a college degree (maybe even 2) and although being a mom is the greatest and most important job in the world, you *might* actually want something more to your life than folding laundry and running hangry children to 900 events and remembering that they're all due for dental cleanings," she wrote.

Yup. The "default parent" role is real and weighted heavily toward moms as it is. For stay-at-home moms, it's 100% expected, and that doesn't suddenly end when it's time to start thinking about joining the workforce again.

And, of course, moms barely have time to try to figure all of this out.

woman in white long sleeve shirt holding brown and white labeled can

A working mom is the ultimate multitasker.

Photo by Memento Media on Unsplash

So, as Johnson says, "But for now, you cram yourself into the only pair of jeans you have right now that fit and find a t-shirt on the floor that isn't clean but isn't dirty and will pass for the 4 hours of mom-taxiing you're about to do and you tell yourself, 'I'll figure it out another day. Right now, I gotta get the kids to practice.'" Oof.

Johnson's entire post is worth a read, as it resonates with so many women at this stage of life. But just as telling are the comments from women who not only see themselves in Johnson's description but who feel like they were sold a bill of goods early in their motherhood. So many of us were led to believe that the skills and experiences of managing a family would be valued in the workplace simply because they should be and that the gap in their resume wouldn't matter.

"This hits hard. I am right there too. And all those volunteer hours & leadership positions people said would look good on my resume when I once again applied for jobs? Those people all lied. It means squat," wrote one person.

"Thank you! You spoke my heart. 42 this year, resigned from teaching almost 12 years ago, and never been more confused about my personal future, or exhausted in my present," shared another.

"I’ve never related to a post more in my life! THANK YOU. Your words perfectly summarize the loneliest, most important job in the world and how that perspective shifts in your 40s. It is confusingly beautiful," wrote another.

Some moms have chosen to see their post-stay-at-home era as a fresh start to learn something new, which might lend some inspiration to others.

woman carrying baby with two ladies beside her smiling

Beginnings are often rough, but that's okay.

Photo by Alexander Grey on Unsplash

There is hope in the comments, too.

"I went back for my master’s degree at 47 years old. I’m now 50 in a new career I love and my husband is doing just fine pulling his weight with after school/carpool/dinner. Happy for the years I stayed home, happy with this new season too," shared one person.

"Yuuuup. I decided to go back to grad school at 45. It’s insane but every term I complete I’m like - omg I’m doing it! So don’t let sweaty out of shape bodies and carpool fatigue stop you. I take naps and write grad school papers and have meltdowns where I cry from the frustration of it all - but dammit I’m doing it!" wrote another.

One mom who is past this stage also offered some words of encouragement:

"So incredibly well written. I feel all these things and did throughout my 40s. Now I'm in my early '50s and I'm so glad I was able to stay home with my kids, but the guilt! The guilt of not using my education, the judgment of people who don't understand why someone would stay home with their kids, the social engineering... We just eat each other alive sometimes don't we? I wouldn't trade it for anything, but it is a very lonely road and one you always question. I can tell you that all three of my kids were so grateful to have a full-time parent. I might not have always been the best, but they were glad to always have someone to talk to if they needed it. It's hard to fill other people's buckets when your bucket isn't full, but the rewards do come back when the kids tell you thank you for everything that you've done. "

Being a mom is hard, period. Working moms have it hard, stay-at-home moms have it hard, moms who have managed to keep one foot in the career door and one foot in the home have it hard. There's a lot that society could do to support moms more no matter what path they choose (or find themselves on—it's not always a conscious choice), from providing paid maternity leave to greater flexibility with work schedules to retirement plans that account for time away from the workplace. Perhaps that would at least make the many choices moms have today feel more like freedom and less like choosing between a rock and a hard place.

This article originally appeared two years ago.

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Visit Sweden

Wellness

Feeling burnt out? Doctors are prescribing trips to Sweden

Get ready for the best "sick days" you'll ever have.

Visit Sweden

True

It’s no secret that modern life is stressful. Burnout is an epidemic. The World Health Organization boldly stated its dedicated efforts to help people improve their health and well-being through nature.

And thanks to a new initiative, Sweden is stepping up to offer a new holistic remedy: a physician-prescribed visit to Sweden, aka “The Swedish Prescription”.

“We have made great strides in making nature/social/culture prescription a more integral part of public health in the United States– but there is still so much more to be done,” said Dr. Stacy Stryer, Associate Medical Director for Park RxAmerica.“I welcome Sweden’s initiative and hope it will help break down institutional and organizational barriers, ultimately benefiting all patients.”

Patients can escape to Sweden’s pristine environment for true respite. Backed by scientific data and research from Yvonne Forsell, Senior Professor at Karolinska Institutet, healthcare professionals can prescribe Sweden as a destination where patients engage in non-medical treatments and outdoor activities to ease their ailments and offer a fresh reset.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Restore body and mind with the Swedish ritual of alternating ice baths and saunas. Swim, hike or forage through silent forests, lakes, parks and nature reserves – or simply sit in the stillness. Witness the Northern Lights dancing across winter skies, or soak up the calm of the summer midnight sun. In Stockholm, Europe’s clean-air capital, take a deep breath and feel the difference.

Or skip the great outdoors and spend time embracing Sweden’s unique cultural practices. “Our cozy fika tradition [Sweden’s daily pause for coffee and conversation], our “lagom”-balanced lifestyle [the idea of “not too much, not too little”] and our easily accessible nature are a soothing balm for body and mind,” says Susanne Andersson, CEO at Visit Sweden.

Sit back in front of a masterpiece in one of Sweden’s many art museums, or head out to a live music event after browsing concert options on Swedish-founded Spotify. You might catch chart-topping hits from producer Max Martin or discover the country’s thriving metal scene. Call it an early – or late – night, and enjoy restorative sleep in Sweden’s cool night air.

Sweden is the therapeutic destination your health has been craving. Learn more about “The Swedish Prescription” and its benefits for your mental and physical health here.

Health

12 photos of women before and after an orgasm shines a new light on women's sexual wellness

"We hope that everyone viewing this project will feel more confident about their bodies and sexuality."

Marcos Alberti

Imagine if this kind of joy had a bigger place in the world.

You might recall Marcos Alberti's mega-viral "3 Glasses" project from 2016, in which he photographed people after they had consumed one, two, and then three glasses of wine. The series was impactful in part because it showed the physical transformation that comes from being relaxed after some wine. That, and it touched on a common curiosity. Haven’t we all wondered if we look as different as we feel after getting a little tipsy? (Spoiler alert: the answer is yes.)

Using a very similar format to “3 Glasses,” as well as the elements of lightheartedness, novelty, and rawness that made it so special, Alberti utilizes his photography to delve into a topic much less discussed: women’s sexual wellness.

The concept is simple: photograph women before, during, and after an orgasm. You can see why he calls this the “O” project.

Despite the subject matter, Alberti assures viewers that the intention wasn’t to be explicit, or even erotic, for that matter. The 20+ women who participated, of varying ethnicities and varying levels of sexually liberated versus conservative countries of origin, were completely covered below the waist while using personal massagers.

“The underlying message: all women deserve to be in control of their sexuality, no matter their background. Women should be free to be empowered by–and have a little fun with–their sexuality,” Alberti wrote on his website.

Similarly, Fan Yang, Global Brand Manager of Smile Makers (a sexual wellbeing brand that partnered with Alberti for this project) noted that the goal was to break through stigma and show female pleasure in a positive, healthy light. The hope is that not only society normalizes female pleasure, but that women themselves connect to their sexuality without “shame and secrecy.”

Given that all the women who participated were “in awe” seeing themselves “glowing and radiant” in their final photo, as Yang put it, it feels safe to say mission: accomplished.

Take a look:

marcos alberti, 3 glaas, big o, orgasm, sexual wellness, womens sexual wellness, personal massager, female pleasure An O Project participant. marcosalberti.com

In a video posted to YouTube, we get a behind-the-scenes look at Alberti’s process. Welcoming the models in, setting up his camera behind a curtain for privacy, talking them through the process, making them feel safe and comfortable, etc.

We also get to see the “awe” that Yang spoke of. It’s palpable.

“Initially, I was still apprehensive… [with] a lot of worry. And this one [referring to the final image] is like “Ha! Life is beautiful!” one woman shared, grinning ear-to-ear.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

We can talk ad nauseam about how women’s pleasure shouldn’t be a taboo subject, about how it’s a natural, vital part of her overall wellbeing, how it can lead to better mood, heart health, immune function, sleep, intimacy, self-esteem…yadda, yadda yadda…but there’s nothing like actually witnessing its semi-miraculous powers firsthand. It’s one of the things that make photography so powerful. We feel something raw and honest on a visceral level, so that we can THEN talk about it with empathy and understanding. It’s clear that Alberti knows this on a deep level and is using that knowledge for something truly good.

Be sure to follow Alberti (@marcos_alberti ) on Instagram to keep up-to-date with all his work.

From Your Site Articles

wellness

Internet

Millennials and Gen Z ditched top sheets much to the dismay of older generations. So who's right?

Team duvet or team top sheet?

Canva

A woman pulls up her bed sheet

GiphyOnce again, the youngins are flabbergasting the older generations with their disregard for once-important things they now deem unnecessary. There's always something that gets dropped or altered generation to generation. We learn better ways or technology makes certain things obsolete. But it doesn't matter how far we've come, our beds still need sheets to cover the mattress.

The debate is on the use of top sheets, also known as flat sheets. They're the sheets that keep your body from touching the comforter, most Gen X and Boomers are firmly for the use of top sheets as a hygiene practice. The idea being that the top sheet keeps your dead skin cells and body oils from dirtying your comforter, causing you to have to wash it more often.

Apparently, Millennials and Gen Zers are uninterested in using a top sheet while sleeping. In fact, they'd rather just get a duvet cover, though they may be cumbersome. A duvet cover can be washed fairly frequently, but some may opt for a simple comforter, a cheaper option that should be washed even more often. Still, many young people don't care how much more frequently they'll need to wash their comforters because their distain for a top sheet is that strong.

top sheet, flat sheet, bedding, duvet, generations, millennials, Gen Z, hygiene, sleep, making the bed A woman snuggled up in her duvet coverCanva

But why on earth do Millennials and Gen Zers hate top sheets? It turns out it's mostly about practicality. Many Millennials are on the move holding a full-time job and a side hustle or two to make ends meet. To add an extra step when making the bed seems unnecessary.

“For a younger demographic, eliminating that step when making the bed in the morning really gives you a jump start on the day," Ariel Kay, CEO of Parachute tells Wall Street Journal.

Parachute is a company that offers bedding sets sans top sheets for folks who just don't like them and, boy, has Kay heard everyone's unsolicited opinions on the matter. She told WSJ that people will stop her on the street to get into debates about the importance or unimportance of top sheets. Yikes.

top sheet, flat sheet, bedding, duvet, generations, millennials, Gen Z, hygiene, sleep, making the bed Feet poking out from under the coversCanva

In a since deleted tweet, @JesseLynnHarte writes, "People say millennials “killed” chain restaurants, marriage, & napkins... But WHEN will they acknowledge our greatest take-down yet?? TOP SHEETS. I don’t know a single millennial who uses one. Top sheets are archaic. This is just the truth."

It would seem that Millennials and Gen Z would much rather wash their duvet covers weekly than to add a flat sheet into the mix. One big complaint about the flat sheet that adds another con to the list is they get bunched up or tangled around your legs if you're a restless sleeper. Not everyone likes hotel tucked corners on their sheets because it can feel confining.

top sheet, flat sheet, bedding, duvet, generations, millennials, Gen Z, hygiene, sleep, making the bed Gif from "New Girl" of woman trying to make the bed via Giphy

But if you run hot, Boomers and Gen Xers might be onto something with the top sheet. It would seem that that thin piece of material that irritates some people can help control your body temperature according to USA Today. Even if you don't tend to need the cooling effect of a top sheet, what Mary Johnson, Tide Principal Scientist at Procter & Gamble has to say in a USA Today follow up article, just may make you rethink ditching the top sheet.

Simply by existing, "people produce one liter of sweat, 40 grams of sebum, 10 grams of salt, and 2 billion skin cells. All that stuff that happens below the waist [and] up by your head—skincare products, hair care products, ear wax, snot, drool, lots of really gross stuff—is transferred to your sheets," Johnson tells the outlet.

So whether you're team top sheet or not, it may be a good idea to at least wash whatever you use to cover your bed at least once a week.

@goodhousekeepingofficial
We asked the #GoodHousekeeping team what they really think about #topsheets, and the answers might surprise you. 😆 Keep watching to find out where everyone stands in this epic #bedding #debate.

This article originally appeared earlier his year.

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Popular

14 comfort meals from the 1970s that are still delicious and affordable

Break out the casserole dish.

Image courtesy of Reddit/Slow-moving-sloth

Foods like casseroles were popular during the 1970s.

All things old are new again—and the same goes for classic recipes.

For those who grew up during the 1970s (that's Baby Boomers and Generation Jones), staple dishes that were served at the dinner table are being rediscovered on Reddit by newer generations looking for filling, comforting, and affordable meals.

According to JSTOR, actress Liza Minelli first coined "comfort food" back in 1970. Minelli told food columnist Johna Blinn, "Comfort food is anything you just yum, yum, yum."

Meals from the 1970s are nostalgic and also budget friendly. Try making one of these comforting recipes from Redditors that will fill you up and not break the bank.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Tuna casserole

"I LITERALLY made a tuna casserole last night & had the leftovers for lunch today." - Disastrous-Soup-5413, RogerClyneIsAGod2

Turkey (or chicken) tetrazzini

"Tetrazzini is a creamy pasta dish with turkey (or chicken) chicken, mushrooms, and cheese." - Disastrous-Soup-5413

Liver and onions

"Liver and onions, mashed potatoes and a green salad made with iceberg lettuce, tomatoes cut in wedges, cucumber slices .. peeled and miracle whip salad dressing." - Kaktusblute

Quiche Lorraine

"A family favorite quiche recipe from the 1970’s. The secret? Half a cup of mayonnaise and an unreasonable quantity of cheese. My mom uses sweet onion instead of green onion, but otherwise made as written:

1/2 c. real mayonnaise
1/2 c. milk
2 eggs
1 Tbsp. corn starch
1 1/2 c. cubed cooked ham
1 1/2 c. (about 1/2 pound) chopped Swiss cheese
1/3 c. sliced green onion
Dash pepper
1 unbaked 9" pastry shell

Mix together real mayonnaise, milk, eggs and corn starch until smooth. Stir in ham, cheese, onion and pepper. Turn into pastry shell. Bake in 350 degree Fahrenheit oven 35-40 minutes until golden brown on top and knife inserted comes out clean." - banoctopus

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Cheese fondue

"For fondue, you can go in a few different directions. Cubed crusty bread is one of the classic ways to dip into cheese fondue, but you could use fruits, vegetables, chunks of cooked or cured sausages, so long as they will keep their structural integrity." - Bluecat72

Meatloaf and baked potatoes

"A basic meatloaf is ground beef, minced onions, bread crumbs, an egg and a squirt of ketchup for moisture, salt, pepper, garlic powder.. whatever you like. Get your hands in there and squish it all together until thoroughly mixed. Form into a vague loaf shape on a pan and bake at 350 for an hour. Poke a couple potatoes with a fork and cook them in the microwave for 5-7 minutes. Enjoy a meatloaf sandwich with mustard for lunch the next day 😋." - yblame

Pork chops with rice and cream of mushroom soup

"Brown the chops, take them out of the pan, pour in rice, soup and water, stir to combine. Put the pork chops on top. Cover and simmer for 20 minutes or until rice is cooked. Tossed green salad: iceberg lettuce, chopped scallions, tomatoes, cucumbers, Wishbone Italian Dressing." - hicjacket

Salmon croquettes

"Salmon croquettes were a staple of my childhood. Canned salmon, saltine crackers, and an egg. We called them croquettes but naw, they were shaped into salmon patties." - DazzlingBullfrog9, throwawaytodaycat

Mexican casserole

"Brown ground beef, stir in a can of tomato sauce and 1 sliced green onion. Mix together a cup of sour cream, a cup of cottage cheese and a can of chopped green chilies. In a 9x13 pan, layer crushed tortilla chips, meat, cream mixture and grated Colby-jack or Colby cheese. Repeat layers. Bake until hot and bubbly." - Open-Gazelle1767

Hamburger Stroganoff

"One pound ground beef, 1 package Lipton onion soup mix, 1 can cream of mushroom or chicken soup, sour cream. Brown the ground beef, stir in the can of soup and soup mix. Stir in the sour cream until it looks right...I think it's a half pint, but maybe a whole pint. Serve over rice for the 2 kids who eat rice and egg noodles for the one kid who doesn't." - Open-Gazelle1767

Shake 'N Bake Chicken

"Shake’n Bake chicken or pork chops. 'And I helped!' Preheat oven to 400F. Moisten chicken with water. Place breasts in Shake-n-Bake shaker bag. Shake the bag vigorously to coat the chicken. Bake for 20 minutes if boneless, 45 minutes if it does have bones." - Karin58

@allrecipes
Where are all the Shake n Bake girlies? 🍗 Today @nicolesperfectbite is showing you how to make this classic bread coating at home—and dare we say better than the original? 👀 #instafood #food #foodie #shakenbake #bake #chicken #breadcrumbs #paprika #garlic #onion #powder #meat #breading #bread #easy #easyrecipe #recipe #quickandeasy #weeknightdinner

Grilled cheese and tomato soup

"Still my favorite thing to eat, but now I make my own tomato bisque, my own bread, and use Gouda or cheddar. Back then Mom made this for Friday lunch: Campbell's tomato soup (made with milk) and the grilled cheese was two slices of five-loaves-for-a-dollar white bread with Velveeta, grilled with Miami Maid margarine in the Revere Ware skillet." - Mindless_Pop_632, mulberryred

Pork sausage and rice

"I grew up in the 70s and my mother made this sausage and rice dish at least once a month. The recipe is from Peg Bracken's I Hate To Cook Book. Crumble 1 to 1 1/2 pounds of pork sausage (hamburger will do, but pork is better) into a skillet and brown it. Pour off the fat. Add:

1 green pepper, chopped
2 green onions, chopped
2 or 3 celery stalks, chopped
2 c. chicken consommé or bouillon
1 c. raw rice
1 tbsp. Worcestershire sauce
1/2 tsp. salt

Put on the lid and let it simmer at lowest possible heat for 1 hour." - officerbirb

Sloppy Joes

"Classic Sloppy Joes. My family had these regularly in the ‘70s." - ThatPtarmiganAgain

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Community

14 books that completely changed the way people see the world

"It’s incredible how the right book, read at the right moment, acts like a psychological lever."

Photo credit: Canva

Self-help books, philosophical novels, and children's classics abound.

In his (often misquoted) 1889 essay "The Decay of Lying: An Observation," Oscar Wilde boldly declares that “Life imitates Art far more than Art imitates Life.” While this question has sparked countless philosophical debates, there remains an undeniable kernel of truth: in a beautiful moment of kismet, for some indescribable reason, a piece of art resonates with you.

For Reddit user @_rahmatullah, that happened when they read a specific book. On the Subreddit “r/productivity” they wrote: “A few months ago, I stumbled upon a book (I won’t name it here to avoid biasing responses), and it triggered something I can’t fully explain. It didn’t just change how I think—it changed what I notice, how I react, and how I show up in life. Since then, I’ve made it a habit to collect these transformation stories—not summaries, not reviews—but real-life shifts triggered by reading a book. It’s incredible how the right book, read at the right moment, acts like a psychological lever.”

Then, they posed the following question: “I’m asking this out of pure curiosity (and maybe low-key research): Have you ever read a book that changed your internal wiring in any way—your mindset, habits, or how you see the world? … Sometimes, the best books aren’t bestsellers—they’re just the right words hitting us at the right time.”

books, recommendations, reading So many book recommendations, so little time. Photo credit: Canva

The comments were flooded with wonderful, life-changing book recommendations, from nonfiction epics about breaking through creative barriers to children’s books that remain on their mind. We’ve collected 14 of the most intriguing, below:

The War of Art by Steven Pressfield (2002)

One user describes the book: “It’s not super long, and it’s written in this really straightforward, almost no-nonsense way. But it hit hard. The whole idea is about Resistance, that sneaky little force that stops us from doing the stuff we actually care about. It made me realize how often I make excuses without even knowing it. And Pressfield’s take is simple but powerful, just show up, do the work and don’t wait for some magical moment.”

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Others were quick to follow, with one person commenting, “The War of Art is the only book I have ever read more than once. Well worth the read” and another said, “Do The Work is a solid follow up to it. It’s short and to the point. Can easily listen to the audiobook in one sitting when you need a boost to GSD (get sh*t done). It’s 90 min.”

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey (1989)

One of the great self-help books from the late 1980s was recommended by multiple people.

One commented, “If I wanted to suggest the ONE book anyone to read in their lifetime, it is it. The idea is simple—be proactive, live by your values, and focus on what’s in your control. It will change the way you think and approach life.”

Another agreed, writing, “7 Habits also changed my life years ago by making my interpersonal relationships better, even though it doesn’t talk much about it. The book just motivated me to be my authentic self, increase my self-worth, and hence improved my relationship with others as a side effect. I had also read how to win friends and influence people at that similar period, but that book didn’t add any value as much as 7 Habits did.”

If the World Were a Village by David J. Smith (2002)

The first children’s book to grace the chat is a best-selling thought experiment that imagines the world’s 6.8 billion population as a village of just 100 people. One person describes it as a “short picture book, but [one that] completely changed how I see the life, world.”

- YouTube www.youtube.com

They continue, “I was shocked how fortunate I was compared to all other people who do not even have basic food and water, and at the time, I was so ashamed that I took it for granted. Since then, I’ve traveled around the world, trying to interact with local people, and I try to learn about the history and the reality of these locations. (And I learned English to communicate.) I would not be who I am today without that book.”

The Anatomy of Anxiety by Ellen Vora (2022)

Acclaimed psychiatrist Dr. Ellen Vora’s nonfiction book helps readers understand how anxiety manifests itself in the body and mind as a fear mechanism—and walks them through steps they can take to overcome it.

“Before reading this book, I’d been focusing lopsidedly on the spiritual side and suffering from years of anxiety problems and panic attacks,” writes one Reddit user. “This book is a turning point for me, enabling me to view the mechanism of anxiety in the body more objectively.”

Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes (1966)

First published as a short story in the April 1959 issue of The Magazine of Fantasy & Science Fiction (which won the Hugo Award for Best Short Story the following year), Flowers for Algernon is a powerful novel about the treatment of people who are mentally challenged. It explores the complicated relationship between intellect, emotion, and happiness.

One person commented that the novel “really made me think about how we all judge and treat other people, especially how we as humans look down on other people in different, subtle ways. It actually made me sick in a way I’ll never forget” and “completely changed my view on how we treat ‘stupid’ people. It’s so profound, because it’s such a short text, but it just hits you like a bullet train. I never cried so much after reading a book before.”

Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance by Robert M. Pirsig (1947)

Pirsig narrates a summer motorcycle trip undertaken by a father and his son, which slowly morphs into a man’s search for meaning.

“I can’t fully describe the feeling. Part of my love was his concept of ‘quality’ and it almost becomes religion-like,” commented one person. “It’s been probably 25 years since I read it. I should read it again.”

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Ishmael by David Quinn (1992)

“The metaphor about society being a faulty plane that is falling off a cliff but thinks it’s flying simply because it hasn’t hit the ground yet has always stuck with me,” wrote one Reddit user of the philosophical novel.

Framed as a Socratic conversation between two characters, author David Quinn explores the ways modern human supremacy causes irreparable damage to the environment.

Another user echoed their praise, writing: “I read a ton of self-help, and all the ones mentioned in this thread I have rolled my eyes at because they reiterate common thought trends with an occasional light bulb moment. Not to say they aren’t helpful, just not necessarily 'change my life' kind of books. Ishmael made me THINK and put life in perspective. It was the book that changed my conservative thinking to a very much empathy based way of living with intention.”

Meditations by Marcus Aurelius (161-180)

The Roman Emperor’s series of personal writings resounded with readers, with one who commented, “Some of the best thoughts on how to live and grow, and how to deal with adversity, mortality, and impermanence. Dude was pretty in touch with the universal human condition for an Emperor.”

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Another person replied, “I think I really need to give a copy of this to my brother… It really helped me out, and I think I see him struggling with things that could be easier for him with some tools he could gain from this.”

Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach (2004)

Reddit users are not the only ones who loved this book about embracing life through the heart of a Buddha; beloved Buddhist Thich Nhat Hanh wrote, “Radical Acceptance offers us an invitation to embrace ourselves with all our pain, fear, and anxieties, and to step lightly yet firmly on the path of understanding and compassion.”

Similarly, people on the thread sung its praises, writing, “Her RAIN method has literally saved my life and changed my perspective on how I interact with the world and how I treat myself. Thanks to her, I’m heading into a new chapter where trauma doesn’t rule my life,” and “This book helped me tremendously while navigating hard personal situations, including terminal disease in my family.”

The Power of Your Subconscious Mind by Joseph Murphy (1963)

One person found this book, which posits our subconscious dictates life events, to be tremendously powerful.

“I’m a pragmatic person and would question this book would it be introduced to me now instead of when my mind was more open,” they begin. “Maybe it works because it makes you believe that all it takes is a wish and some work… I read it when I was about 15 and have had many things I wished for happen.”

Siddhartha by Herman Hesse (1922)

Hesse’s ninth novel follows the spiritual journey of a man during the time of the Gautama Buddha. Originally published in 1922, it was later published in the United States in 1951.

One user writes, “We sometimes find ourselves most lost when we stop believing other people are going to be able to give us the mentorship we need. Often, literature can teach what straightforward non-fiction texts can’t.”

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends on It by Kamal Ravikant (2020)

For a user on the thread, Ravikant’s inspirational self-healing book “brought home how essential self-love is, and that it isn’t indulgent or narcissistic. It’s the foundation that makes everything else possible.”

The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1943)

One of the best-selling books of all time, The Little Prince comments on life, adults, and human nature.

In particular, one part of the novel stood out for this Redditor: “The part in The Little Prince where the adult looks at his drawing and thinks it’s a top hat and the kid says ‘no, it’s a picture of a snake that just ate an elephant’ really helped little kid me understand how people can see the same things so differently. It seems small now, but as a little kid it’s hard to understand why adults ‘don’t get it’ when it seems obvious to kids. That helped me have patience for my parents/adults, and I think I carried it with me as a beginner builder of compassion for people in general.”

Get It Done by Aylet Fishbach (2022)

The final book recommendation came from a user’s friend. For them, psychologist and behavioral scientist Aylet Fishbach’s book “changed the way I think about how I manage my time and myself. I rarely think of ‘recovery’ and ‘productivity’ in the same sentence, and generally think in terms of opportunity costs or how to best use my time.”

This article originally appeared in June.

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Generation Jones explains their major cultural differences with Boomers

"Think of us as a generation that got the tail end of the party but had to clean up the mess."

Photo credit: Canva

Generation Jones points out the biggest cultural differences between them and Boomers.

Generation Jones, people born from 1954-1964, is considered a 'micro-generation' between Boomers and Generation X. Though typically lumped in with Boomers, there are some pretty distinct differences between them.

In an online community of Generation Jones-ers, a member named @WalkingHorse, prompted those in Generation Jones to discuss how their upbringing differed from Boomers in a post titled "What is and who are Generation Jones. Step inside...".

"We're often described as pragmatic idealists—raised on big dreams but tempered by economic recessions and a sense of lowered expectations compared to the Boomers’ post-war prosperity," they wrote. "Think of us a generation that got the tail end of the party but had to clean up the mess."

How Generation Jones differs from Boomers

It inspired many Generation Jones members to share their thoughts and opinions. These are some of the major cultural differences those in Generation Jones have with Boomers:

"We were too young to fully participate in the counterculture of the '60s but old enough to feel its aftershocks." —@WalkingHorse

Gen Jones men also signed up for the selective service, but were not drafted as the Vietnam war had ended." —@tedshreddon

"Boomers had Elvis and The Beatles. We had Led Zeppelin and Pink Floyd." —@Scr33ble

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A post shared by ✦ᴊᴏɴᴇsɪɴɢ ғᴏʀ ᴘʀᴏsᴘᴇʀɪᴛʏ™✦🟦 (@genjones1964)

"First teenage generation to experience the Space Shuttle launch. First teen generation to watch music videos in between movies on cable TV then the birth of MTV. We laughed when hearing that golf obsessed President Gerald Ford would routinely slice or hook a ball into a crowd of spectators. Then laugh at Chevy Chase for mimicking our clumsy commander in Chief. We watched our parents go through the fuel rationing days where you could only buy gas for you car if the last digit on the plate was an odd or even number. We counted days along with the media on how long the Iran hostages were being held. We lost John Lennon while not in that sweet spot age to have experienced the musical British Invasion of the 60’s. Instead, MTV opened to floodgates to the Brit-pop invasion of Duran Duran followed closely by big hair, neon clothing and wondering why saying ‘too hip’ was all that and a bag of chips. Best part was that college tuition was sorta affordable." —@contrivancedevice

There for the start of major social change

"Not mentioned yet, but we were present for the rise of gay rights. Went to my first gay bar at 19. Music, especially Disco, was infused with pride and acceptance and coming out. 'We are Family', 'I’m Coming Out'. Queen and the Village People, etc. The rise of 'women’s music' like Holly Near and Chris Williamson. Activists like Harvey Milk and later ACT UP. We were young adults when AIDS hit and the fight for treatment led to a huge wave of coming out. We lost a whole generation of gay men to that plague. 😢" —@BldrJanet

"Boomers remember where they were when President Kennedy died. We remember where we were when John Lennon died." —@KJPratt

1950s kids, 1960s culture, MTV era, Vietnam aftermath, Led Zeppelin, gay rights history, disco music, Woodstock album, cassette tapes, space shuttle launch, Iran hostage crisis, Elvis Costello, Cyndi Lauper, Freddie Mercury, cultural nostalgia, postwar generation RHCP on cassette is peak Generation Jones.Photo credit: Canva

"Musically speaking, I think we were blessed. Our musical heyday had everything. Our moms played Elvis the king on the radio, and we had Elvis Costello. The Stones and The Who transverse generations. We are old enough to remember Joan Baez and Bob Dylan pre-Chalamet, not to mention Freddie and Elton before their bio-pics. And Johnny Cash too. And shout out to the poster girl of the 80’s Cyndi Lauper (I got special love for her as a race tracker cause she walked hots at Belmont Park.)" —@Binky-Answer896

"We gave a hoot, and didn’t pollute!" —@Awkwardimplemet698

"We are the generation that got to see the war every evening at dinner 'live via satellite'. —@blurtlebaby

"Think: 45s—albums—-8 tracks—cassettes—-CDs—-Streaming! I’ve had the Rolling Stones on all!" —@NOLALaura

A generation marked by change and chaos

Woodstock album, cassette tapes, space shuttle launch, Iran hostage crisis, Elvis Costello, Cyndi Lauper, Freddie Mercury, cultural nostalgia, postwar generation Gen Jones was there for the launch of the tech revolution. Photo credit: Canva

"I always said that I experienced it all...born in 1957. I listened to my older siblings music. I stole my sisters Woodstock album when she went off to college. I still have it. I recall all the assassinations from JFK and MLK.I saw RFK being killed on live tv.(at least I think I did), I remember the chaos of the Vietnam war, the Chicago riots, the Nixon mess. I recall the beginning of the environmental fight, Sesame Street and the moon launch. Computers, and floppy discs, cell phones that came in small cases that would plug into the car. So much good stuff. So much chaos." —@mammaV55

"There’s a sure way to know if you’re Gen J. Were you deadly afraid of quicksand?!" —@NOLALaura

This article originally appeared earlier this year.

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