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The first openly trans man is graduating from Spelman. Here's his incredible story.

This commencement season, one Spelman College student is making remarkable history.    

Keo Chaad O'Neal says that he is the first openly trans man to graduate from Spelman College, one of the most well-known single-sex historically black colleges (HBCUs) in the nation.

In a social media post that's now gone viral, O'Neal stands proudly in a Spelman stole, grinning from ear to ear. The response to his accomplishment was profound.


O'Neal's undergraduate journey was not a linear one.He transferred out of Spelman, an all-women's college, to a predominately white institution (PWI) because he couldn't be his "full queer self." Though O'Neal initially found women who encouraged him to be live authentically, he found himself constantly having to choose between being queer and being unapologetically black.

"I felt like no matter what, I was sacrificing a part of myself, so then it came down to which fight I wanted to fight," says O'Neal. "This became one of those instances where you have to choose your race over your sexuality which, unfortunately, a lot of QPOC (queer people of color) have to do."  

O'Neal's choice is all too relatable for many queer black kids navigating higher education spaces.

Some institutions normalize blackness, while others normalize queerness. It's rare for kids of color find a place that affirms both.  

Intersectionality, which describes overlapping and interdependent systems of discrimination or disadvantage — such as race, gender, and sexuality — is something that many queer black kids grapple with in society. Having various identities, all of which are discriminated against in compounding ways, can be a heavy burden.

Being unapologetically black and queer shouldn't be mutually exclusive, but for many black youth, it is.

Fortunately, O'Neal had a support system that gave him the confidence to transfer back to Spelman and be himself there, each and every day until he graduated.

Particularly helpful to O'Neal were Dean of Students Fran'Cee Brown-McClure and the Spelman Wellness Center's Coach Makeba Reed-Johnson. "I wouldn't have been able to finish out at Spelman if it were not for them," says O'Neal. "They defended, protected, and extended themselves to me."  

He also found a supportive network of friends, including Spelman junior Abeo Chimeka-Tisdale.

"I think that Keo's graduation is important to the atmosphere at HBCUs because it shows that there is a place for us at the institutions, even if we have to create that space for ourselves," Chimeka-Tisdale says in an email. "It shows that even when these institutions try to erase or ignore us, we can persevere and thrive on our own."

O'Neal's support network serves as an example for other institutions looking to create a more inclusive student body.

Mount Holyoke College, a single-sex school in South Hadley, MA, likely has one of the most progressive policies the nation. The college admits students designated male at birth who identify as female or nonbinary, as well as those designated female at birth who identify as male or nonbinary.

In September 2017, Spelman announced that it would admit transgender women, becoming one of many colleges around the nation revisiting admissions policies as it pertains to trans and nonbinary students.

Though encouraging, admissions policies are just the beginning of true change. Single-sex college campuses must work to foster environments that make queer and trans students feel safe and included in the student body. The necessary shift is slowly in the works, particularly in the black community, according to O'Neal.

"Since my coming out, people are a lot more curious and a lot more willing to learn about sexuality and gender and more importantly, learning the difference between the two," he says. "I find that people are a lot more genuine when talking to me about queerness because they really just want to understand, which is something I never got my freshman year."  

Working toward systemic change is no easy undertaking. But O'Neal says that starting with yourself, your campus, or your community — even if it's hard — is the best first step.

"Sometimes you have to carve out your own spaces to exist, and that is OK, but do not allow anyone to put you in a corner," O'Neal says. "Let people feel the weight of who you are and let them deal with it."

Photo courtesy of Keo Chaad O'Neal, used with permission.

Pop Culture

Here’s a paycheck for a McDonald’s worker. And here's my jaw dropping to the floor.

So we've all heard the numbers, but what does that mean in reality? Here's one year's wages — yes, *full-time* wages. Woo.

Making a little over 10,000 for a yearly salary.


I've written tons of things about minimum wage, backed up by fact-checkers and economists and scholarly studies. All of them point to raising the minimum wage as a solution to lifting people out of poverty and getting folks off of public assistance. It's slowly happening, and there's much more to be done.

But when it comes right down to it, where the rubber meets the road is what it means for everyday workers who have to live with those wages. I honestly don't know how they do it.

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Joy

5-star Scottish resort offers whimsical afternoon tea experience with 'naughty sheep'

Cameron House's Woolly Wellness retreat includes tea in the garden with adorably rude guests.

Cameron House/Naughty Sheep

Cameron House's Woolly Wellness retreat includes a unique sheep encounter.

Remember when "goat yoga" was all the rage? And then "cow cuddling" and "turkey cuddling" made everyone's bucket lists?

Now we can add "nuzzling with naughty sheep" to the mix, but with a fancy Scottish twist.

Less than an hour from Glasgow, Scotland, the Cameron House resort sits on the bonnie banks of Loch Lomond, looking as if it were plucked straight out of a fairy tale. Sprawling green grounds, gorgeous lake views and a four-story castled mansion greet guests as their "home away from home" (only better), and a perusal of the reviews show guests raving about the 5-star resort's elegance, beauty and exceptional service.

I mean, just look at this place:

drone view of cameron house grounds and lakeCameron House sit on Lake Lochmond in Scotland.Cameron House


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A pitbull stares at the window, looking for the mailman.


Dogs are naturally driven by a sense of purpose and a need for belonging, which are all part of their instinctual pack behavior. When a dog has a job to do, it taps into its needs for structure, purpose, and the feeling of contributing to its pack, which in a domestic setting translates to its human family.

But let’s be honest: In a traditional domestic setting, dogs have fewer chores they can do as they would on a farm or as part of a rescue unit. A doggy mom in Vancouver Island, Canada had fun with her dog’s purposeful uselessness by sharing the 5 “chores” her pitbull-Lab mix does around the house.

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@caitlin.the.realtor/TikTok, used with permission

Wait, so 90's fashion is in, but 90's hair is out?

Every era has its own version of what’s attractive. And very rarely does that aesthetic hold power with the following generation. In fact, it often becomes the opposite of cool.

Just think of Elvis. He might have been a universal sex symbol for a time, but it also wasn’t long before his pompadour became passé. Same goes for Paul Newman’s rugged manliness, David Cassidy’s babyface, Tom Selleck’s mustache. Indeed, for everything a season.

Which brings us to the 90s. The age of beach blonde surfer boys (real surfing skills not required, but a plus). Of flannel, lots of flannel, and super chiseled bodies. Let’s not forget this was the dawning of the term “metrosexual,” and also the time period that brought us that Calvin Klein ad with Mark Wahlburg.

How exactly would these guys measure up with the Gen Z kids today?

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popular

A wild Eurasian crow befriended a toddler and won't leave his side

Crows are so much smarter than we think.

A Eurasian crow.

A family from Denmark has created a touching video montage documenting their unique friendship with a wild Eurasian crow. This crow, affectionately named Russell, has become an honorary member of their household, forming special bonds with each family member, including the pets.

However, the crow's relationship with their son, 2-year-old Otto, is truly extraordinary. “They could spend hours just playing,” Otto’s mother, Laerke Luna, says in a video shared by The Dodo. "When Otto is outside, he will never leave Otto’s side.”

Russell, the free-spirited crow, ventures away from the family's home from time to time, but never for too long. He always comes back and announces his return by tapping on the door, swooping in to lounge on the sofa, or awaiting Otto's return from school atop their roof.

“When we are inside, he will sit inside the window because he wants Otto to go outside with him,” Laerke said.

The family’s relationship with Russell didn’t come out of nowhere. When Russell was a young bird, he had health problems so the family took him and nursed the bird back to health. Eventually, they witnessed his first attempts to fly.

Recently, Russell became friends with another family member, their second child, Hedwig. Although he does get a little annoyed with the bird’s frequent attempts to nab his pacifier.

Even though it’s rare for humans to strike up such a close bond with a crow, according to research, it’s not that surprising. Audubon says that crows are “some of the smartest animals in the world” with an intelligence “on par with chimpanzees.” They are also very social and family-oriented, so no wonder Russell loves Otto and his family.

Crow Named Russell Waits For His Favorite Kid To Get Home From School | The Dodo


Learning

Why you shouldn't throw your dishwasher pod into the bottom of your dishwasher

Dishwashers actually use the dirty water to know how to wash your dishes.

Photos by cottonbro studio and PhotoMIX Ltd. via Canva

Why your detergent shouldn't go in the bottom of the dishwasher

There always seem to be something going on with the pods and powders you're supposed to use in the dishwasher to clean your dishes. Either the pods don't dissolve completely or the powder gets all goopy and hard, never really fully dispensing into the dishwasher.

The inconsistency in product dispensing can leave you wondering if the dishes are even getting cleaned, causing some to toss the detergent pod into the bottom of the dishwasher. It would seem that placing the detergent at the bottom would allow for it to actually reach your dirty dishes. But Melissa Pateras, a domestic expert, explains that doing it that way isn't doing what you think it's doing.

Pateras actually breaks down exactly how dishwashers work to clean your dishes while explaining why putting the detergent on the bottom is ineffective.

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