+
Love Stories

Women are celebrating 'self dating' using Miley Cyrus' 'Flowers' as their anthem

"When you're the boyfriend you've always wanted…"

self dating, women, tiktok

Self-dating is one of TikTok's latest trends.

Miley Cyrus' official music video for her new single "Flowers" is less than two weeks old, and it's already racked up a whopping 108 million views on YouTube. The smash hit also broke Spotify's record for the most streams in a single week, knocking K-pop superband BTS and their hit song "Butter" out of the top spot.

There's a reason "Flowers" is making waves. It's not only a catchy tune, but an empowering one, especially for women who've been socialized to believe they need a significant other to make them happy.

While most post-break-up songs are filled with heartache and lament and perhaps a bit of resentment, "Flowers" takes a different tack. While Cyrus sings about not wanting a relationship to end, she ultimately realizes she can give herself what she wants from a partner and it's incredibly liberating.


The song has become an anthem for an already existing TikTok trend of women celebrating "self dating." Rather than waiting around for someone to ask them out, women are taking themselves out—to coffee, to dinner, to bookstores, to the movies—showering themselves with love and attention and enjoying their own company.

For instance, this woman did the "date night challenge," which involves having your date blindly choose between two activities written on cards, but she did it for herself.

@justlikegilmoregirls

Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do #barnesandnoble #readersunite #bookwormsoftiktok #bookdate #romancebookstiktok

Another woman demonstrated the connection between "Flowers" and Bruno Mars' "When I Was Your Man," showing how the former song appears to be a direct response to the latter. (And her caption, "Dating yourself is top tier," hit home for a lot of women, as did "When you're the boyfriend you've always wanted.")

@yourtorontolatina

Dating yourself is top tier 💗 #boyfriend #funny #selflove #selfcare #dating #loveyourself #fyp #foryou #trend #viral #flowers #mileycyrus

Some TikTok users have made self-dating into an art, sharing their whys and hows with other women.

@desireefiggins

#fyp #datejar #selflove #selfcare #dateyourself

This woman even committed to only self-dating for an entire year. She shared how she did it and what she learned about herself in the process. "Treat yourself exactly how you'd treat a partner," she shared. Excellent advice for us all.

@zabby1

Replying to @faithyyy this pretty much sums it all up! Treat yourself exactly how’d you treat a partner 🤎

As someone who has been happily married for two decades, I can attest that self-dating isn't just for singles. Self-care is empowering no matter your relationship status, and taking deliberate time to get to know yourself and give yourself what you know you need may even make you a better partner.

@bryntaponn

10/10 highly recomend. #fyp #mileycyrusflowers #selflove #selfdateideas

Having a special someone can be wonderfully fulfilling, but the idea that we need someone else to make us feel fulfilled is problematic in all kinds of ways. In my experience, the more healthy, happy and whole we are on our own, the more we are able to contribute to a relationship. So whether we're single or attached, regularly treating ourselves to a self-dating routine is a win-win for us and for whoever we may eventually end up with—even if that person is simply ourselves.

Our home, from space.

Sixty-one years ago, Yuri Gagarin became the first human to make it into space and probably the first to experience what scientists now call the "overview effect." This change occurs when people see the world from far above and notice that it’s a place where “borders are invisible, where racial, religious and economic strife are nowhere to be seen.”

The overview effect makes man’s squabbles with one another seem incredibly petty and presents the planet as it truly is, one interconnected organism.

Keep ReadingShow less
Family

2023 Mother's Day gift guide helps you celebrate moms in style

If you’re looking for the perfect Mother's Day gifts for the incredible moms in your life, we've got you covered.

Editor's Note: Upworthy earns a percentage of revenue from items purchased on this list.


Mother's Day is just around the corner, and it's time to get shopping. And if you’re looking for the perfect Mother's Day gifts for the incredible moms in your life, we've got you covered! Our curated selection of thoughtful and unique presents will make any mom feel special and loved. From cozy pajama sets and smart mugs to personalized pet jewelry and heartfelt books, these gifts cater to a variety of interests and preferences. Our handpicked choices are the perfect way to express your gratitude and love.

Keep ReadingShow less
@allbelongco/TikTok

How bizarre, how bizarre.

It should go without saying that it’s not cool to steal from your Airbnb. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t still happen.

However, when one Airbnb host recently discovered a guest had—for some strange reason—stolen one of her paintings, then replaced it with a completely different painting, she decided to make the best out of a very uncool situation by sharing the story on TikTok.

As a result, viewers got to witness an continuously unraveling, truly bizarre modern-day art heist.

Okay, let’s get into it.

Keep ReadingShow less
Health

Scientists have just discovered the ‘anxiety gene’ and what turns it off

This could completely change how we treat anxiety and depression.

A young woman struggles with anxiety.

Living with an anxiety disorder can feel like a constant battle against an invisible enemy. People with anxiety disorders feel constant, excessive worry, restlessness and irrational fears, often accompanied by physical symptoms such as rapid heartbeat, tightness in the chest and difficulty breathing.

These overwhelming feelings cast a shadow over daily life and make it difficult to focus or enjoy simple pleasures. Anxiety disorders can also feel isolating, as the sufferer may struggle to communicate their feelings, making it hard to receive support and understanding.

Anxiety disorders are among the most common forms of mental illness and studies show that an estimated 31.1% of U.S. adults experience an anxiety disorder at some time in their lives. Around half of all people who suffer from anxiety disorders go into remission at some point.

Keep ReadingShow less
@abbycashman7/TikTok

From worst day to best day in less than ten seconds

Sometimes the best cure for a bad day is a good surprise.

Just ask Abbie Cashman, a woman in Ireland whose entire day was completely turned around the minute she began feeding a pet crow from the window of her taxi. Cause why not?

In an interview with Today, Cashman shared that after discovering she had a flat tire while at work, the planets seemed to align so that getting home was impossible. No taxi would take her. The bus was full. Luck did not seem to be on her side.

Cashman made one last attempt to book a taxi through a rideshare app. Finally, someone was able to pick her up.

Little did she know that the taxi driver would not only get her home, but also introduce her to a special winged friend to lift her spirits.

Keep ReadingShow less

Wedding DJ mashes up dance music and fandom theme music

There are those people who like certain franchises and those that would literally design their entire house around their particular fandom. It's a fine balance between loving something and it becoming part of who you are as a person but for some, they're totally cool with everything being Harry Potter. I may or may not have tried to convince my husband we needed an Avengers bedroom set. In my defense, they make them up to king size, so clearly they're for grown ups.

If you're one of those people like myself that has a borderline unhealthy love for all things Marvel, then you will be in for a treat and quite possibly a new wedding DJ. Dimitri Beauchamp has been mixing up tunes for wedding receptions and posting short clips on TikTok. But it's not just regular dance music, Beauchamp mixes in people's favorite franchise theme songs making the hits even more epic.

Keep ReadingShow less