+
Family

This gun store owner has a radical plan for preventing suicides by gun.

Ralph Demicco was sitting in his sporting goods shop one Saturday morning when he noticed a customer who was acting slightly ... off.

She was conspicuously overdressed and refused to make eye contact when she came up to the counter and asked to look at a pistol.

Demicco asked the woman if she should really be buying a gun — and she immediately broke down crying. He told WBUR that he brought her into the back room of the store, where she confided that she was planning to kill herself. He let her stay there and collect herself while he reached out to her doctor.


Demicco may have saved a life that day. But he has good reason to be so careful.

Note: not actually Ralph Demicco. Photo by Scott Olson/Getty Images.

During one week in 2009, three different people bought guns at different times from Demicco's store.

Each of them used the gun they'd bought to take their own life later that same day.

"Apparently our marginal screening process did not pick up on any of these individuals," Demicco told The Trace in 2016. Unfortunately, the National Instant Criminal Background Check System only flags people who've been committed to a mental institution against their own will.

So, technically speaking, the employees at the store did everything they were supposed to. But according to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, guns are responsible for nearly half of the more than 40,000 suicides each year, and suicide accounted for almost two-thirds of the total gun deaths in the country — meaning it's an even bigger problem than the homicides and mass shootings people tend to hear about.

Photo by Ted Aljibe/AFP/Getty Images.

In 2011, Demicco decided to do something about this.

He teamed up with public health professionals and local firearm dealers to establish the New Hampshire Firearm Safety Coalition, taking an active role in preventing suicides.

It began with a simple plan to reach out to all 67 gun shops in New Hampshire — first to start a conversation, then to see if they'd be willing to display posters or pamphlets in their store to raise awareness about suicide. The NHFSC also provides training to firearms dealers to help them spot warning signs in customers.

Within a year, half of the firearm retailers in the state were on board with the cause.

One of the posters, which includes a list of warning signs to look out for.

"We’re learning about warning signs and spreading an additional message of gun safety to our customers," Demicco said in a press release.

"If you’re worried someone is suicidal, offer to hold on to their guns until they are in a better place."

"It's not that gun owners are more likely to be suicidal or depressed," coalition co-chair Elaine Frank added in an interview with USA Today. "It's that guns are the most lethal way for someone to take their own life."

She's right: Most suicides are fairly impulsive, and 70% of people who survive an attempt won't try again. Unfortunately, only about 10% of people survive a suicide attempt by gun. Which makes gun intervention that much more important.

Another NHFSC pamphlet, which aims to normalize the additional gun safety rule of "consider temporary off-site storage if a family member may be suicidal."

While New Hampshire may have been the first state to launch this kind of program, the idea is starting to make its way around the country.

And the results are looking pretty good.

A new law passed in Washington state in March 2016 with the support of both the NRA and the Second Amendment Foundation. The law will increase training and messaging about suicide prevention among gun dealers and other firearm professionals, as well as in all gun sport safety materials.

Even more recently, the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention teamed up with the National Shooting Sports Foundation to research, create, and implement a plan that reduces suicide rates 20% by 2025.

The official AFSP infographic for Project 2025.

Overall, more than two dozen states have launched programs similar to the one in New Hampshire in the last five years.

According to the Trace, this includes famously pro-gun states with higher suicide rates like Alabama, New Mexico, Kentucky, and Colorado.

There has been some resistance, of course.

"I think there’s a fear among some stores — it’s been expressed vehemently — that it’s just another backdoor attempt at grabbing guns," said one New Hampshire firearm dealer. "You gotta convince people that this isn’t about gun control, it’s suicide control."

Photo by Mark Makela/Getty Images.

Mental health and gun deaths are both complicated issues.

There's no one-size-fits-all-solution to either one, of course, but it's encouraging that people are working toward systemic solutions.

Perhaps the most inspiring thing about these kinds of programs is the way they bring people together from all across the spectrum.

As one Harvard researcher who was following the New Hampshire coalition told U.S. News & World Report: "The suicide prevention people were largely not gun owners. The gun owners on that committee didn’t have a background on mental health or suicide issues. We learned so much from each other."

When it comes to saving lives, actions speak much louder than words. And as these initiatives prove, that's something everyone can agree on.

Pop Culture

Tired of 'hacks?' Here are 20 of the best life tips sourced from 21.9 million real people.

All of them are simple and practical. A few might just change your life.

Arjun Mahadevan's life pro tip Twitter thread

Arjun Mahadevan gave the world a gift when he crowdsourced the best “life pro tips” from nearly 22 million people. He shared the top 20 in a Twitter thread that’s got over 619,000 views. Mahadevan sourced the tips from the Life Pro Tips subforum on Reddit, which has been running since 2010.

Mahadevan is the CEO of doolaHQ which he calls the “business-in-a-box” for LLCs.

Mahadevan labeled his advice “20 life tips you wish you knew when you were 20,” but they are helpful for everyone regardless of age. They’re useful for anyone who is in a relationship, has a job or wants to stay sane in an aggravating world.

Keep ReadingShow less
Science

Fascinating video shows how an orangutan mom learned to nurse from a breastfeeding zookeeper

Zoe had been orphaned at a young age and hadn't developed her maternal instincts.

Metro Richmond Zoo/Youtube

Just two new moms helping each other.

Whitlee Turner, a zookeeper for the Metro Richmond Zoo in Virginia, was given a unique task—teach an orangutan to breastfeed.

Turner’s pupil, Zoe, had been orphaned at a young age, and without guidance presumably hadn’t learned any maternal instincts. Zoe’s first baby had to be hand-raised after she was unable to nurse, so when baby #2 came around, the zoo was determined to reach a different outcome.

That’s why they called on Turner, who had coincidentally also become a new mom. Thinking Zoe could be taught by example—a strategy that’s proven successful in the past—Turner was asked to bring her newborn son, Caleb, in to give a demonstration.

Turner agreed wholeheartedly.

Keep ReadingShow less
Pop Culture

People are loving Drew Barrymore's live reaction to her first perimenopause hot flash

“I don’t know that I have ever heard a celebrity talk about a hot flash in the moment. Thank you for being so real."

The Drew Barrymore Show/Youtube

Drew Barrymore getting a quick assist from Jennifer Aniston

It feels safe to say that many, if not most people hail Drew Barrymore as the “Queen of Candid.” She can seemingly talk to absolutely anyone about anything in a way that’s consistently warm and authentic.

That even goes for when she experiences her first hot flash in front of a live television audience, apparently.

While speaking with guests Jennifer Aniston and Adam Sandler on her talk show, Barrymore abruptly appears flustered, fanning herself and removing her jacket.

Without missing a beat, she says, “I am so hot, I think I'm having my first perimenopause hot flashes.”
Keep ReadingShow less

A subway station at 59th street in New York City.

New Yorkers may seem like a brash, uncaring bunch to the uninitiated. But when you get to know the people and the city, you’ll probably realize that they are “kind, but not nice,” as opposed to how many describe people on the West Coast as “nice, but not kind.”

A great example of New Yorkers looking out for one another happened on Reddit’s AskNYC subforum earlier this month. AskNYC is where New Yorkers consult one another on various topics, such as where to get cheap rent, subway shortcuts, and places to volunteer.

It all started when a Redditor named Andy, 21, who is autistic, reached out for help in a post titled, “Please help, where do I wait.” On the forum he goes by the name GalacticBambi. Andy is a native New Yorker who moved away at a young age. His father passed away two years ago, so he came back to the Big Apple to see his cousin and learn more about his father.

Keep ReadingShow less
Joy

Basketball referee has an emotional reunion with the player who saved his life on the court

Not many people survive a "widow maker," but thanks to the player's quick actions, this ref lived to call another game.

Basketball referee reunites with player who saved his life.

There are some things people are never quite prepared to experience, and a heart attack is high on that list. Semi-pro basketball referee John Sculli found himself on the receiving end of an unexpected heart attack, right in the middle of reffing a game.

Sculli was keenly watching the game between Toledo Glass City and the Jamestown Jackals when he went from following the players down the court to sprawled out on the ground. He was quickly surrounded by other referees, but his fall got the attention of Myles Copeland, who recognized Sculli was unresponsive and immediately began CPR.

"I had never witnessed someone just collapse, but I knew what had to be done," Copeland told CBS.

Turns out Copeland wasn't just a basketball player, he was also a firefighter, and his quick actions saved Sculli's life. Doctors told the referee and his fiancé, Donna, that he had a "widow maker" heart attack, which is often fatal. So when the two men got a chance to reconnect with Donna in tow, emotions ran high and CBS caught it on video.

Keep ReadingShow less

No more cleaning mattresses. Mom has a hack for stomach bugs.

Whether you have kids or plan to have kids in the future, you should know that you're going to clean up someone else's bodily fluids and waste. It's just a fact of caring for small children. In fact, you can almost guarantee that you're going to clean up vomit that exits a tiny person's body with more force than you knew possible. Is it fun? No. Does it help that kids are cute and just want cuddles when they're not feeling well? Absolutely.

There are all kinds of tips and tricks to make your little ones feel better during cootie season, which can sometimes feel year-round. Some people swear by homeopathic preventions and remedies while others stock up on vitamin C. But outside of Pedialyte popsicles and keeping a bucket nearby hoping for the best, there's not really a trick to surviving the dreaded stomach bug.

Except, maybe there is. A mom who runs the TikTok account @lovedthishatedthat may have just cracked the code to surviving those long nights when your kid has a stomach bug: an inflatable bed.

Keep ReadingShow less