upworthy
Family

'Unlimited screen time.' 'Ice cream for dinner.' 18 moms revealed their 'deep dark' secrets.

It's refreshing to hear the truth.

mom secrets, reddit, screen time

Being a mom can be frustrating.

No parent is perfect, even though some social media stars and mommy bloggers want us to think they have it all figured out. In the real world, parenting isn't that easy. Every parent is beautifully imperfect, and every kid is delightfully quirky. So, as long as we do our best, it’s more than enough.

A Reddit user who goes by brookeaat wanted to feel better about how she has fallen short of parental perfection. So she asked the followers of the BreakingMom subforum to “share their mom secrets so that I don’t feel so bad about myself."

She started the conversation by leading with her dark secret. “Sometimes I give my 5-month-old a little bit of water (like a capful from a plastic water bottle),” she wrote. “She loves it so much, and since it’s such a tiny amount, I don’t mind, but I know most other moms would judge the sh** out of me if I said that.”

For those who didn’t know, pediatricians say that you shouldn’t feed a baby water until they are 6 months old. “It’s because babies’ bodies aren’t suited for water until several months after birth. Tiny tummies and developing kidneys put them at risk for both nutrient loss and water intoxication,” Healthline reports in a medically-reviewed article.

Many of the responses centered around screen time, and many moms admitted to allowing their kids to have as much as they like. That opposes the recommendations that children under 2 years old should have zero screen time and those over 2 years old no more than two hours a day.

Many moms also admitted that they have given up trying to feed their children consistently healthy meals, and they have given in to their kids’ desire to each chicken and french fries for every meal.

Here are 18 of the most revealing “deep dark” mom secrets the mothers admitted to on the Reddit post.

1.

"Sometimes I just seriously want everyone in my house to leave me the f**k alone." — transponster99

2.

"My 2.5yo had two slices of cheese and an ice cream sandwich for dinner." — GroundbreakingTale24

3.

"Oh man... I don't care what my child eats. I mean, I CARE. I TRY. But it's so draining for me to fight him about food. He turned 3 in April and you know what? He gets almost all of the important vitamins/nutrients from smoothies. I hide zucchini and carrots in banana bread. Spinach is tasteless in smoothies. Eats pasta. Refuses veggies most of the time. Will eat chicken if fried or in nugget form but no other meat and no other way. If my child is gonna sit there and eat a whole loaf of bread, I really do not care anymore. I DO care about his sugar consumption. That's all lol." — Inner-Membership-175

4.

"Screen time is ongoing at my place. I’m 37 weeks pregnant and I don’t think I could do toddlering without Blues Clues. When this baby comes, I def will continue the screen time. Survival." — MaleficentMouse666

5.

"I'm tired of being nice to my kid all the time. She is like, the nicest lil 6 year old ever. Nice to toddlers. Popular with all ages. Sticks up for others. Would literally give me her last bite of ice cream if I asked. But, oh, man, I want to scream I DONT F****** CARE!!! the next time she says 'Mom, look at me...' do whatever inane thing she's already done 10000x. I want to scream SHUT UP FOR ONE DAMN MINUTE every time she runs out of her limitless words and begins just making stupid noises to entertain herself. I want to say OMG I DO EVERYTHING FOR YOU the next time she hits me with a weaponized 'you're weeelllcooom' when she does the barest minimum of anything and I'm supposed to fall over myself with gratitude. I want to ignore her every time she narrates her every friggin action to me, oh hey, she's telling me a riddle right now that makes no sense, oh god it's still going and I'm smiling and pretending to get it. Ha ha, that's a good one.
Seriously. The best kid ever. Teacher's favorite. Emotional intelligence far beyond her years. I'm a monster. I would never actually say any of this. But my poor brain, just let it hear itself think. Just let me be still. Let me stop having to react all the time." —
throneofthornes

6.

"I regret having my oldest child. He has ruined my life and I’m stuck in a hellscape I never wanted for myself. My literal only hope some days is that he leaves at 18." — redtonks

7.

"My 11yo doesn’t have a bedtime or screen time restrictions (he has site/app restrictions)." — Its_Me_Jess

8.

"I rarely wash my kiddo's hair. I brush it and she takes baths daily, but I can’t justify her screaming every night." — Weekly Pie

9.

"I don’t usually bother to put anything more than a diaper on my one-year-old while we’re at home unless it’s cold or she’s going to bed. She eats in her pjs and they get covered in oatmeal, so I take them off and she just stays like that, not worth the fight and distress of the manhandling that she hates just so I can do even more laundry. Also, it’s interesting how even given the choice to watch as much TV and screens as she wants because I don’t limit it she watches only pretty much an hour a day." — PeachGotcha

10.

"I let my 2-year-old sleep on my butt most nights. He has a beautiful, woodland-themed bedroom complete with a large Montessori bed, camper-shaped tent, and Hatch machine.But he'd rather sleep to cat videos on the couch with my butt as a pillow." — Choice-Examination

11.

"Kids wear the same clothes for school and sleep 2 days straight because we bath every other day and I’m too lazy to change their clothes other than after bathing or if very dirty.

I only brush their teeth once a day.

I ditched safe sleep because my first had a horrible flat head, my second slept so much better in his stomach, and my third I didn’t even try safe sleep and I don’t feel guilty at all.

I also sometimes drink too much while watching the kids. That I feel guilty about." — babystay

12.

"I'd half charge the iPad and when the battery died, they were out of screen time for the day. Now they can turn on computers and the Xbox so they don't use the iPad anymore, but it always bought me enough time in the mornings to have some coffee and get ready." — CrimeBrulee_

13.

"My husband cleans the house while I breastfeed my kid to sleep. I almost always lay next to her for a bit longer and scroll on my phone and enjoy her presence until I can hear him finished, so that I don’t have to help." — HollyBethQ

14.

"My son slept in our bed until he was like 13 years old. Sometimes when he visits (he’s 23 now and turned out fine!) he will still get in my bed with me and read or watch videos. He also camps out in our bed (on my side) when I’m not there, so I think he just likes our bed." — Apprehensive_Set_151

15.

"I honestly can’t stand to be around my 8-year-old son anymore; I don’t like who he is. His behavior is awful and he does things purposely to shock and irritate me. He got mad and threw a toy at me the other night when I sent him to his room for time-out; he threw it so hard that it hit the floor and it bounced up and cut my leg. I feel like an awful mother/human being for feeling this way and it breaks my heart. I just don’t know what to do with him anymore. He’s in counseling and takes medication, but it only does so much." — NorwegianMuse

16.

"I let my 15-year-old drink. Sometimes. With family and food. If I, or my mother, has- cooked full, fancy, meal, and we’re all sitting down to with either a full bottle or a split, he can have a up to a glass with his meal." — [deleted]

17.

"I really don’t think I should have ever been a mom, I regret it a lot and wish I could do my life over. I do love my child with all my heart and try to do as best as I can and I will never let them know how I feel." — purplejanuary14

18.

"I just wanna say....I love all you ladies so much. This thread is hella refreshing!" — Bob-Bhlabla-esq







Pets

Four guys asked their new neighbor if they could walk her dog. Then the dog wrote back.

"If you ever get bored, we are more than happy to look after him/her."

via Stevieticks / Instagram

A black dog and a note form "the boys from number 23."

If you've lived your whole life with a dog, a home has to feel pretty empty without one. Your heart has to feel like there's something missing as well. When Jack McCrossan, originally from Scotland, moved to Bristol, England with his three friends, they were bummed out to learn that their landlord didn't allow dogs.

So when they saw a beautiful black Sheprador (a German Sheppard Lab mix) in their neighbor's window, they knew that had to become buddies with her. They wrote the dog's owner, Sarah Tolman, a letter asking to arrange a play date with the dog. "If you ever need someone to walk him/her, we will gladly do so," they wrote.

"If you ever get bored (we know you never will, but we can dream), we are more than happy to look after him/her. If you want to come over and bring him/her to brighten our day, you are more than welcome. If you want to walk past our balcony windows so we can see him/her, please do," the letter continued.


"We hope this doesn't come too strong, but our landlord won't allow pets, and we've all grown up with animals. The adult life is a struggle without one," they wrote. "Yours sincerely, The boys from number 23," the letter concluded.

Soon after, the boys in 23 received a response from the dog herself, Stevie Ticks, accepting the offer. However, it may have been written by her human, Sarah Tolman. In the letter, Stevie shares a bit about herself, saying she's two years and four months old, was adopted in Cyprus, and that she's "very friendly and full of beans." (The boys shouldn't worry about a gassy hound, in England, "full of beans" means lively.)


"I love meeting new people and it would be great if we can be friends. I must warn you that the price of my friendship is 5 x ball throws a day and belly scratches whenever I demand them," the letter continued. A few days later, the boys got to meet Stevie. "Meeting Stevie was great!" McCrossan told Buzzfeed. "She was definitely as energetic as described. We got to take her for a walk and she wouldn't stop running!"

black labrador, dogs, dog-walkers, kind nieghbors, stevieticks, bristol, ukA black labrador (representative image).via Canva/Photos

Tolman thought the boys' letter was a fantastic gesture in an era where, quote often, neighbors are strangers. "In a day and age where people don't really know or speak to their neighbors, it was really nice for them to break down that barrier," she said. After the story went viral, she saw it as an opportunity for people to share their love of dogs with the world. "My mother and I are amazed at all the love we've received from around the world these past few days," Tolman wrote as Stevie. "If you have a doggo in your life, share that love with those around you."

A lot has changed in the past 6 years since this story warmed hearts around the globe. The boys have since moved away, but as of September 2024, Stevie is around 8 years old and still doing well. Her keeper and Sarah's partner, Chris Bowley, shared an update on Instagram. "[The boys] sadly moved out of Bristol. However, we have always tried to keep the ethos going of Stevie having as many friends and meetups as possible," Bowley wrote.


This article originally appeared six years ago.

Angel statue in Poland

Over the past decade, Scandinavian concepts like ‘hygge’ and ‘lagom’ have dominated wellness and decorating trends. Hygge, a Danish concept without a direct English translation, captures the essence of coziness, warmth, and comfort in one's surroundings—think candles, fireplaces, and strategically placed lamps. Lagom, on the other hand, comes from the Swedes and roughly means “just enough. " This concept preaches finding tranquility in the balance of all things.

Which, you know, is nice. (Who doesn’t want to live in a lovely, snug home and bathe in the warm glow of candlelight?) What idiot would say no to a perfectly balanced life where there’s never too much or too little?

But sometimes, the biggest concern in life isn’t “How can I make this room cozier?” Life comes at you fast. Money arrives, then leaves even quicker. Families disagree, creating generational rifts that seem insurmountable. Governments fail to protect their citizens, exposing them to war, danger, and poverty. What then? Do Europeans have a neat little phrase for that?


white book near mugHygge is nice, certainly Photo by Pavan Trikutam on Unsplash


“Things will work out in the end”

In fact, the answer is yes. Enter 'Jakoś to będzie' (pronounced 'Ya-kosh toe ben-jay'), which literally translates to "Things will work out in the end." This contrasts sharply with the sunny, optimistic advice that often emerges from idyllic nations like Denmark, the Netherlands, and Sweden. “Learning about happiness from the Scandinavians can feel a little like learning about money from a millionaire when you struggle financially,” writes Olga Mecking. “Instead,” she continues, “why not learn from a country that has been through hell and back — multiple times — and is still standing?”


beautiful multicolored buildings Poland is a living testament to the human spirit Photo by Maksym Harbar on Unsplash

Of course, she is referring to Poland, a Central European country that has existed for 500,000 years. As one imagines, there’s a lot of history sandwiched between those 500,000 years, beginning with the Polish state’s establishment during the 10th century. In the 14th century, Poland joined forces with the Grand Duchy of Lithuania, culminating in the formation of the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth—one of Europe’s largest and most populous nations. Then, the strife: during the 18th century, the Commonwealth began to decline, eventually leading to the last King of Poland, Stanislaw Augustus, abdicating the throne in 1975. From there, many wars, insurrections, and violent protests were mounted against the country’s forced partitions, upheld by unwelcomed, occupying armies. However, Poland would not see independence again until 1918, when the Allies agreed to the country’s reconstitution in the aftermath of World War I. From there, even more chaos ensued. Devastation reigned during World War II, as much of the country fell into Nazi Germany’s hands, and Poland saw the near-annihilation of its Jewish population during the Holocaust.

Poland stands today not just as a country but as a powerful testament to the strength of the human spirit: despite the traumas that may come, optimism is always available to us. ‘Jakoś to będzie;’ “things will work out in the end.”


The true meaning of ‘jakoś to będzie’

Much like the country it hails from, the concept of ‘jakoś to będzie’ is all about resilience and grit in the face of life’s darkest and most uncertain moments. “It’s the unwavering certainty that we can do anything, no matter what obstacles we face along the way,” says Beata Chomątowska, co-author of “Jakoś to będzie. Szczęście po polsku” (or “Jakoś to będzie, the Polish way of life”). Meanwhile, the BBC describes ‘jakoś to będzie’ as “the perfect philosophy for tough times.”


brown and green concrete building under white sky during daytimeIt's Poland's philosophy for hard times. Photo by Zhi Xuan Hew on Unsplash

In some circles, ‘jakoś to będzie’ is presented as the anti-‘hygge’. While the latter encourages us to retreat into comfort, to adorn ourselves in cozy objects and fuzzy socks, the Polish approach embraces uncertainty head-on. This isn’t the time for hiding under a blanket with hot cocoa; ‘jakoś to będzie’ stresses the importance of acting without overthinking the consequences. It’s a peculiar philosophy that could only emerge from a country that has endured some of the most brutal hardships in history.

So, in an increasingly erratic, unknowable world, it might be wise to borrow a page or two from this Polish school of thought. Whenever a scary, daunting challenge arises—personal crises, difficulties at work, attempts to navigate any number of global problems, etc.—instead of falling into despair, try channeling a bit of this Polish spirit instead. Don’t overthink. Take that risk. Make something happen. ‘Jakoś to będzie’ — somehow, everything will work out. Moving forward is always better than staying still, no matter how frightening. Or, as Polish author Daniel Lis puts it, “[Life] is always a bit of adventure.”

Diane Tirado/Facebook

Left: Teacher Diane Tirado. Right: The note she left for students after being fired.

If you're of the mind that kids today are being coddled and not properly prepared for the real world, well, you might want to buckle up for this one. The story out of a public school in Florida has parents and teachers alike up in arms.

A Florida teacher was fired for giving her students zeros for missing assignments. Diane Tirado has been a teacher for years. Most recently, she was an eighth-grade history teacher at Westgate K-8 School in Port St. Lucie, Florida. Diane recently gave her students two weeks to complete an Explorer notebook project, but several students simply didn't hand it in. Since there was zero work done, Diane gave them zeros.

She got fired for it.

schools, teachers, education, grades, students, parentsMichael Scott from The Office saying "What?"Giphy

The elementary school has a rule called the “no zero policy."

The lowest possible grade that teachers can give students is a 50, even if they don't turn anything in. That means that an extremely poor completed assignment is worth the same number of points as no assignment at all.

Hardly seems fair, right? Westgate is far from the only school that has such a policy, however.

whiteboard, education, classroom, teacher, middle school, 8th grade A message written on the whiteboard for her students after Diane Tirado was firedDiane Tirado/Facebook

It's a rule that Diane, unsurprisingly, does not agree with. After she was fired for disobeying, she left her students a charming goodbye message on the whiteboard.

"Bye kids. Mrs. Tirado loves you and wishes you the best in life. I have been fired for refusing to give you a 50 percent for not handing anything in. Love, Mrs. Tirado"

The scale, as outlined by the school, reads as follows:

A = 90 to 100
B = 80 to 89
C = 70-79
D = 60-69
F = 50-59

Diane later shared the story on Facebook, hoping to spread awareness about the school's policy.

“A grade in Mrs. Tirado's class is earned," she said.

“I'm so upset because we have a nation of kids that are expecting to get paid and live their life just for showing up and it's not real."

Diane's post has gone viral, and most commenters agree with her position – it's not fair to hand out grades for work that doesn't exist.

No zero policies are common in many schools, and teachers notoriouslyhate them. But it's at least worth considering why they exist. Some educators say it's because when a student earns a zero, it's very difficult for them to ever recover their grade in that class. In other words, it may be too harsh. Others argue that, if you don't want a zero, don't turn in nothing! Getting an earned-zero is a great way to learn to at least try.

A follow up statement from the school stated: "Ms. Tirado was released from her duties as an instructor because her performance was deemed sub-standard and her interactions with students, staff, and parents lacked professionalism and created a toxic culture on the school’s campus. ... During her brief time of employment at West Gate, the school fielded numerous student and parent complaints as well as concerns from colleagues. Based on new information shared with school administrators, an investigation of possible physical abuse is underway."

However, school representatives did not deny the existence of the no zero policy, and Tirado claims the school engaged in a smear campaign after she became a "whistleblower" on their policies. She's currently considering legal action against the district.

Still, the debate over the grading policy rages on.

“The reason I took on this fight was because it was ridiculous. Teaching should not be this hard," Diane said.

This article originally appeared 6 years ago.

@trace.gotsis/Instagram

This probably fed the entire staff too.

Mothers need support from their partners during all stages of pregnancy, but especially while going through postpartum. And while having basic needs met, like doing a fair share of the domestic chores, making sure supplies are replenished, doing night feedings, etc. are vital, a little pampering also goes a long way for making mom feel taken care of and helping to boost her mood.

And what constitutes grade-A pampering? FOOD. Glorious, indulgent food. Especially after nine months of having to abstain from many, many no-no foods and drinks. In this regard, a McDonald's order might taste just as luxurious as a Michelin meal. Hopefully dad/partner knows his lady’s cravings well enough to know which route to take.

One dad (@trace.gotsis on Instagram) certainly understood this assignment to the nth degree, showing up with a literal GONDOLA of fresh sushi that was pretty much an edible work of art. His wife apparently had an epic meal before the baby even got its name.

Watch:

Needless to say, folks were impressed.

God I see what you’ve done for others 😭

Best way to propose to me.

“What an absolutely epic moment”

“If i ever have a husband and he does this i will marry him again and then 10 more times after that. 😫😫”

That goes for the dudes too.

"Brother, how can one become your wife?"

Many joked that the newborn’s name should be sushi-related.

You better name that baby Nigiri.

Just call him…baby sashimi

So did you name it Noah or Sushi? Gotta know.

Turns out, they would name their little guy Alfie. Which is probably better than a food name in the long run.

Sushi, like soft cheese, alcohol, and caffeine, is off-limits to pregnant women. Sushi in particular can expose a growing baby to mercury, bacteria, and other harmful parasites. That said, Healthline does say that sushi rolls with low mercury cooked fish can be consumed, like spicy crab rolls, spicy shrimp rolls, chicken katsu rolls, or vegan rolls like cucumber avocado rolls and shiitake mushroom rolls. Probably doesn’t hit quite the same, but might satisfy those cravings nonetheless.

sushi, pregnancy, safe pregnancy foods, sushi rolls, new parentsRows of sushi rolls.

And hopefully moms and moms-to-be have partners who know how to show up and anticipate needs during those intense craving moments, and beyond. That, and helping to make sure she can rest and that spaces are clean and comfortable, will help take off some of the load. Even still, those postpartum blues may come, but boy, does it make a difference.

It probably goes without saying that this type of support needn't show up in the form of a huge sushi boat, but hopefully this does offer up some inspo.



Biker stops to push elderly man home after his shoe broke

Twenty-year-old Idris Shehu, known as cold_r6 online, loves riding his red Yamaha motorcycle and recording each ride on a GoPro strapped to his helmet. On one of his rides, Shehu noticed a man sitting on the padded seat of his wheeled walker and seemingly struggling with the straps on his shoe. Shehu was riding on the other side of the street when he saw the man, but instead of passing him by, he did a U-turn to check on the elderly individual.

What ensued is beyond heartwarming. The act of selflessness happened in April 2024 and was one of his last interactions caught on his GoPro before a motorcycle accident claimed his life just several months later. Recently the clip of his kind act was shared on the social media platform Reddit where it has been racking up views.

In the short video you see Shehu pull up next to the man sitting on his walker to see if he needed assistance. The 20-year-old Farmington State College sophomore asks several times if the man is okay but it's unclear if the man responds. That's when the motorcyclist hops off his bike to try to offer assistance. The older gentleman was wearing black sandals with Velcro straps, but one of the straps appears to be undone.

motorcycle, ride, gopro, good deed, cyclistman riding motorcycleGiphy

Shehu asks if he can strap the shoe for the man, then tries several times to get it to stick before telling the unnamed man, "I think your Velcro's ruined." It was then that the man says he just wants to get home. Clearly the elderly man was unable to walk or scoot the rest of the way home with his broken strap. The man tells Shehu that he lives around the corner and that's when the kind motorcyclist asks if he wants to be pushed, and push him he did.

As the college student pushes the elderly man home, the man asks him about his motorcycle before admitting he once had a Honda 450. The two talked bikes as they maneuvered over bumps and even got strange looks as one person stopped to see if they were all right. Shehu had never removed his helmet so from the outside people could only see a guy in full motorcycle gear pushing an elderly gentleman down the sidewalk. It was likely a sight to see, but eventually they made it back to the man's apartment where they were promptly greeted by a cat.

Shehu was so gentle and kind with the man, it's no wonder that not only did he warm hearts with this interaction, but followers of his accounts flocked to his page to leave well wishes after his final journey.

"The most excellent content. I’m going to sign off the internet for a while after this post so nothing undermines how much I’m smiling right now. Just want to ride the happy wave of seeing human empathy and compassion shine. The 'oh look at the cat!' at the end sent me into another stratosphere," one person writes.

"Imagine how great America could really be if everyone has this level of empathy and compassion. It's people like this guy who restore my faith in humanity," another shares.

motorcycle, motorcyclist, helmet, bike, peopleGoing for a rideGiphy

On the biker's video posted to his own social media page, people share heartfelt messages:

"Rest in peace honey you are a great loss to this world but at least now you can ride forever without knowing anymore pain!!! Ride fast, ride easy, ride high."

Another shared, "This is the first video I saw of you and it's the one I'll remember for life, hold on tight up there."

It's unfortunate such a kind soul was taken so soon but what a sweet memory he leaves behind, not only for the man he helped but for his family, friends, and followers. May people learn from his selfless act of kindness and be inspired to do the same.