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Meet a mom who takes care of people's babies while they make huge parenting decisions.

This is what it's like to be an 'interim parent.'

Black and white photo of woman looking into a baby carrier
Photo by Stacey Natal/Total City Girl used with permission.

Jillian, “...my heart skips a beat."


I'm trying desperately to be respectful of the person speaking to me, but my husband keeps texting me.

First he sends me a selfie of him with Rafi*, then it's an account of who stopped him on his way into the NICU.

Then, he suggests I take a selfie with Jillian* so he can post them side-by-side on Facebook and boast that we finally have two babies.

People will ask if they're twins, I'm sure. But they're not twins. In fact, the babies aren't even ours.

Man and woman each holding a baby

James' dream come true: Two babies! Rafi in the NICU with Tatte, Jillian at home with Eema.

Photo by Ann Lapin, used with permission.

I take care of these babies because I'm what's known as an "interim parent."

Two young girls with a laptop, bottles, and a baby.

Over the past four years, my family has cared for 22 newborns.

Photo by Ann Lapin, used with permission.

The program I'm part of is rare; there are very few like it in the United States.

While the babies are in my care, the birth parents retain their legal rights as parents and are encouraged to visit their babies (if that's something they would like).

Three children hold a baby

My three kids with our baby before he meets his forever mommy.

Photo by Ann Lapin, used with permission.

If they weren't in the care of interim moms like me, these tiny babies might wait in the hospital a few extra days while their adoptions are finalized—or they might enter the foster care system.

In New York and most states, biological parents have 30 days after adoption proceedings begin to change their minds about their placement plan.

I became an interim parent when a local mom posted about it on our neighborhood Yahoo! group.

"That! THAT I can do!" I thought, as I looked at the computer screen.

I was thrilled. I felt incapable of doing other types of volunteer work, but I felt like I had finally found a community service that I could perform. So, my husband and I applied. And after months of doctor appointments, background checks, interviews, and letters of reference from close friends, we were accepted.

Woman with three children pushes an empty a stroller

We left the adoption agency with an empty stroller — but it didn't stay that way for long!

Photo by Stacey Natal/ Total City Girl, used with permission.

The hope with the interim boarding care program is that biological parents have time to gain clarity about their decisions without pressure.

It also helps adoptive parents feel secure in their status as parents.

The children don't usually get the chance to be present when one of our babies goes home, so this was a special day. Roughly 30% of the babies I've cared for have returned to their biological parents after their stay with me, and the rest have been adopted. Many of the birth mothers I've known have pursued open adoptions, selecting and meeting their child's forever families.

People often ask me what the experience of interim parenting is like, but there's no rule: Each case is different.

Babies stay with us, on average, for a few weeks. But one baby stayed with us with five days, another for nine and a half weeks.

Whatever the scenario, my family and I are available to care for these babies until they go home ... wherever "home" may be.

Woman looks into a baby carrier

This work can be emotionally challenging, too.

Photo by Stacey Natal/Total City Girl used with permission.

This work can be emotionally challenging, too. Some biological parents do not interact with us at all while they're making big decisions, and some end up being very involved. Some text regularly, requesting photos and updates on the baby while the baby is in our care. Sometimes they schedule weekly visits with the babies. One birth mom became such a constant in our life that my son asked if we could bake her cookies.

I am often blown away by the biological parents' gratitude.

Melody* was one of the most beautiful babies I'd ever cared for, and I met her parents a couple of times. When they came to take her home, it was as though she was the only one in the room. When they thanked me for taking care of her, my lip started to quiver.

I had also never met Jibraan's dad, either, when I placed him in his arms the day they went home together. "From the bottom of my heart ... I can't tell you what you've done for me," he said. I remember that he towered over me, the size of a linebacker, clenching his jaw to keep the tears from spilling down his cheeks.

Woman smiling on the phone

Big smiles and on the phone.

Photo by Stacey Natal/Total City Girl, used with permission.

When I wave goodbye to the social workers at the agency after introducing each baby to their forever family, I always wonder how long it will be before I get to hold another baby.

I don't get attached to each baby, per se. But I get attached to having a baby, to taking care of a baby. I resent my empty arms, and I feel like I've lost my purpose. So each time I see the adoption agency's phone number pop up on caller ID, my heart skips a beat.

When the voice on the other end says, "Hi, Ann ... are you ready to take another baby?" my first thought is, "Baby! I'm getting a BABY!" That excitement lasts for at least 48 hours.

But even as the adrenaline calms down and the sleepless nights begin to take their toll, the experience of caring for each baby proves to be more than enough motivation for me to keep going.

The emotions that swell when my babies go home with any parent—their adoptive parents or their birth parents—are not just because of the emptiness I feel in my arms or even because of the happiness I have for my babies and their families.

The emotions I feel are because of the fullness in my heart and the gratitude I have for being a part of each of these babies' stories, even if it's just for a moment.


This article was written by Ann Lapin and originally appeared nine years ago.

This Canadian nail salon has people packing their bags for a manicure

There are a lot of nail salons out there and, without word of mouth recommendations from people you trust, it can be impossible to know which salon to visit. Thanks to social media, though, many businesses have pages where they can advertise their services without having to spend a lot of money on traditional marketing practices like television, billboards, and radio. Doing their marketing using pictures and videos of their amazing work can help keep a steady flow of customers coming—but one Canadian nail salon is going with a slightly different approach.

Henry Pro Nails in Toronto, Canada is leaving the Internet in stitches after creating a viral ad for his nail salon. The video takes the beginnings of several viral video clips but instead of the expected ending, Henry pops in completing the viral moment in hilarious different ways.

It opens with a familiar viral video of a man on a stretcher being pulled by EMS when the stretcher overturns, flopping the man onto the ground. But instead of it ending with the injured man on the ground, Henry seamlessly appears laid out on the floor of his salon and delivers his first line, "Come to my nail salon. Your nails will look beautiful."

nails, nail salon, manicure, henry's pro nails, adsRihanna Nails GIFGiphy

In another clip, a man holds his leg straight up and somehow flips himself into a split. When the camera cuts back to Henry, he's in the splits on the floor of his nail salon promoting loyalty discounts. The ad is insanely creative and people in the comments can't get enough. Some are even planning a trip to Toronto just to get their nails done by the now Internet famous top nail artist in Canada. This isn't Henry's first rodeo making creative ads, but this is one is without a doubt his most popular—and effective.

"I will fly to Canada to get my nails done here just because of this hilarious video. You win this trend for sure," one woman says.

"Get yourself a passport and make a road trip! My bf and I are legit getting ours and its only a 4 hr drive from where we are in Pennsylvania. Their prices are a lot better than other places I've been too," another person says while convincing a fellow American citizen to make the trip.

"Omg, where are you located? I would fly to get my nails done by you," one person writes.

"The pedicure I had at Henry’s was the best I have ever had. Unfortunately made all other places disappointing and I don’t live close enough for Henry’s to be my regular spot," someone else shares.

To keep up with demand, in late October 2024 Henry's announced another location was coming soon in Vaughan, Ontario. Though there's no word on when the new "more spacious and professional facility" is opening just yet, customers can keep an eye out for Henry's next ad on social media.

It just goes to show that creative advertising can get people to go just about anywhere, but great service is what gets them to come back. If you're ever in Toronto (or Vaughan!) and find yourself needing an emergency manicure, Henry's Pro Nails is apparently the place to be.

This article originally appeared last year.

Love Stories

WW2 lovers were separated after a blind date cut short, so she drew a map of where to find her

Their unbelievable love story was recorded in hundreds of love letters found by their grandson.

@crewdoyle/TikTok

Where can we watch this movie?

There’s just something about romance stories from WWII that feel like they all belong on the big screen. Looking back on a time of so much urgency and impermanence, those fleeting moments of connection seem even more poignant. It’s truly a testament to the power of love itself, and its ability to withstand even the most unimaginable strife and conflict.

Many of us might carry the love stories of our own parents and grandparents from his era, but for those that don’t, read on. And honestly, even those that do will want to hear this touching tale.

In a truly tear-jerking series posted to TikTok, Drew Coyle shared how he discovered hundreds of heartfelt letters sent by his grandmother Helen to his grandfather Bill, which chronicle their epic love story—from a brief, yet potent blind date, to a promise that took years to fulfill.

@crewdoyle The start of a WW2 love story - Mañana: A Pacific Romance
♬ Last Hope (Over Slowed + Reverb) - Steve Ralph

Bill and Helen first met on December 7, 1944 while both were stationed in the Phillipines— Bill, a traveling sailor, and Hellen, volunteering as a Red Cross "doughnut girl.” That night, enough sparks flew on the dance floor that they made a promise to see each other the next morning. Or as they called it, their “mañana.”


ww2 stories, ww2 romance, ww2 romance novel, ww2 history, ww2 letters, love letters, love stories, romanceA photo of Helen and Bill in their uniformsImages provided by Drew Coyle

But keeping that mañana promise, as it turned out, wouldn’t be so easy. Helen was unexpectedly relocated to Guam the next day, where she stayed in a hut without a telephone, and any messages left at the front desk didn’t always get transferred to their recipient. Still, the young woman was determined to maintain their connection through the letters.

Below are some of the deeply poetic words she wrote in letter #75, which would end up being particularly pivotal in their love story.

@crewdoyle A lonely girl draws him a map 😭
♬ Peaceful Sincerity - Pemancing Biru


“We’re in this together, my dearest…we’re moving forward, hand in hand…haven’t we already proven to our own satisfaction that we walk in the same path at the same speed with the same reactions? And haven’t we already found that there’s a kiss at the end of the walk?

I’m more content than I’ve been in ages…I feel as if I were on the brink of one of life’s greatest adventures, and it is in my nature to be eager when something new and strange and powerful presents itself.

‘Wishing will make it so’ has become my theme song ever since yesterday when I learned it was yours with two of us wishing it will be so. I am reminded of the words of a man I once knew. He insisted that two people were stronger than anything, stronger than one, or three, or five people. Perhaps he was right, let's make it so and prove the point.


- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Helen assured Bill that though they were apart, that he “needn’t worry” about any dancing partners stealing her away on the new island, because “they’re always you,” and urged him to “not give up” on finding her.

She even drew him a map detailing where she was located. It just so happened to include a nearby chapel.

ww2 stories, ww2 romance, ww2 romance novel, ww2 history, ww2 letters, love letters, love stories, romanceThe map provided by Helen to Bill@crewdoyle/TikTok

To think, without that letter, their story might have been cut short. But clearly it worked, because here we have their grandson retelling the story 80 years later. As Coyle wrote on his website, “Helen's innocent act to initiate correspondence caused a ripple effect that would change not only their lives, but lead to me.”

ww2 stories, ww2 romance, ww2 romance novel, ww2 history, ww2 letters, love letters, love stories, romanceHelen and Bill, happy and and content, and oh so in love. Image from Drew Coyle

Passionate to spread their story even further, Coyle created a coffee table book, aptly named Mañana: A Pacific Romance, which you can pre-order here.

In a time of online dating, text messaging, and seemingly very little time to get beyond a “love you honey,” this feels especially heartwarming. What would happen if we engaged in just a portion of thoughtful loving expressions as Helen and Bill had? Would we too feel as though our partnerships were fated? Is this type of romance purely a product of the time period, and something we’d never be able to replicate in a world of modern convenience? These are all ponderous questions without answer, but one thing feels crystal clear: love is indeed a great adventure, if we choose to answer the call.

Follow Drew Coyle on TikTok to hear him read even more of those wonderful letters.

Animals & Wildlife

Why have we domesticated some animals but not others? It comes down to four F's.

An entertaining video explains why we can't ride zebras or breed "war bears."

Horses were domesticated over 5,000 years ago. Zebras, never.

Humans have domesticated several kinds of animals over the millennia, from trusty horses and mules to livestock for milk and meat to our favorite furry companions. But why those specific animals and not others? What is it that led us to those particular choices? Why can we ride horses but not zebras? Why don't we purposefully breed "war bears" to fight for us?

That last question comes straight from the always-interesting and often-hilarious CGP Grey, whose YouTube videos explore all kinds of things we wonder about but don't necessarily take the time to research. In the video "Why Some Animals Can't Be Domesticated," Grey explains the four main elements that make an animal a good candidate for domestication, which excludes bears (and many others) from the list.

Grey alliterated the four elements to make them easier to remember: Friendly, Feedable, Fecund, and Family-Friendly. Let's dig into what those mean.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Domestication requirement #1: Friendly

This one is fairly self-explanatory, but basically an animal has to not post an inherent, immediate threat. We have to be able to catch them if we're going to domesticate them, so that eliminates all of the "carnivores whose day job is murder" as Grey puts it, as well as the large, nervous prey animals that are too afraid of us to let us get anywhere near them.

wild animals, domesticated animals, gazelleGood luck trying to catch a gazelle.Photo credit: Canva

Domestication requirement #2: Feedable

Every animals is feedable, of course, but that doesn't mean it's easy or cheap to feed them, especially in large numbers. This category pretty much eliminates pure carnivores and some omnivores, leaving mostly herbivores (and some unpicky omnivores) that are easy and cheap to feed. And that aren't dangerous (see #1).

wild animals, domesticated animals, chickens, chicken feedChickens will eat just about anything.Photo credit: Canva

Domestication requirement #3: Fecund

This requirement is all about breeding and babies. Some animals are extremely slow to breed, like pandas and elephants, making them undesirable candidates for domestication. Animals that have mate frequently and have relatively short gestation times and/or large litters are more suited to domesticated life. They also need to grow up quickly, which also takes elephants out of the pool.

However, as Grey points out, humans can still tame other animals like elephants. But taming is not the same as domesticating. The basic rule is: If it's on a farm, it's domesticated. If it's in a circus, it's tamed.

Domestication requirement #4: Family-friendly

This is where the horses and zebras question comes in. Horses were domesticated in Eurasia, but if humans started in Africa, why weren't zebras domesticated first? Grey explains that while horses tend to live in hierarchical herds, zebra are more independent with no family structure. Humans can capture the lead male horse and get the rest of the herd to fall in line. Zebra herds are more of a free-for-all and they're kind of jerks to even one another.

horses, zebras, domesticated animals, wild animalsThere's actually a big difference between horses and zebras besides just the stripes.Photo credit: Canva

Barnyard animals have inherent family structures that humans have figured out how to fit into. These animals learn to see the humans who own them as a lead cow or top chicken or whatever.

Way back in the hunter-gatherer age, when humans were just figuring out animal domestication, animals had to have all four of these requirements. Today, we have the ability and technology to domesticate more animals if we want to, but we also have less of a need to. Some breeds of foxes have recently been domesticated, bred to be friendly with humans. How fun would it be to have a pet fox?

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Technically, a lot more animals could be domesticated if people really wanted to put in multiple human lifetimes of time and effort, but why?

You can follow CGP Grey on YouTube for more fun and informative videos.

Education

Grandma shares her must-have device for safe traveling, especially for folks with kids

The grandmother and pediatrician said, “I don’t go to any Airbnb or hotel without it."

A pretty easy and inexpensive travel tips that could save your life

There have been numerous reports of people dying from carbon monoxide poisoning while on vacation, including the teenage son of former New York Yankees outfielder Brett Gardner, whose carbon monoxide test showed a saturation level of 64%, well over what's considered lethal.

The main culprit behind these tragedies is a lack of regulation. Airbnb announced back in 2014—a few months after the short-term rental company faced one of its first reported carbon monoxide-related deaths—that it would require hosts to confirm each of their listings had carbon monoxide detectors installed. However, NBC News reported in 2023 that no such mandate has actually been instilled. Hotels don’t seem to fare much better, since not all require that carbon monoxide detectors are installed.

So, on top of the stresses of airplane travel, people also have this to worry about…which can obviously drain the joy of travel altogether.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

But one grandma (and a pediatrician, to boot) has a simple, yet powerful tip for taking safety into your own hands…literally.

In a video posted to her @Ask.Bubbie TikTok account, Florence Rosen explained why she swears by using a portable carbon monoxide detector, saying “I don’t go to any Airbnb or hotel without it because I don’t trust the carbon monoxide detectors [there] are actually kept in good repair.”

Rosen clearly wasn’t the only one to have discovered this travel hack. One person wrote, “my mom was crazy about ours growing up and now that I’m an adult, I am too.”



Another echoed, “I haven’t traveled without it…ever. US or international.”

A travel agent also chimed in, saying, “I tell all my clients to pack one and we always take one with us to hotels. So important!”

A few showed concern as to whether or not could travel via carry-on, or if it needed to be checked. Travel site AFAR media says airlines allow them in both carry-on and checked bags, but if you have a device that uses lithium batteries, those would have to be removed.

Ranging from $30-$40ish bucks on Amazon, it seems a small price to pay for peace of mind, especially if you’re traveling with kiddos, or are pregnant. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), infants and children have an “increased susceptibility to CO toxicity” because of their higher metabolic rates, with fetuses being “especially vulnerable.”

carbon monoxide at airbnb, carbon monoxide at hotel, carbon monoxide poisoning, carbon monoxide detector, travel, travel tipsA photo of a portable carbon monoxide detector from Amazonm.media-amazon.com

The scariest thing about carbon monoxide is that it’s a silent, odorless killer. Combine that with the fact that with a hotel or Airbnb, you have no idea if precautions are being taken to make sure fuel-burning appliances, such as boilers, furnaces, pool heaters, fireplaces, or water heaters are properly maintained, or that the rooms which contained them are properly vented. Any of these items, when not taken care of, can lead to carbon monoxide poisoning. And you’d never know it.

Thankfully, while there should definitely be wider efforts being made to ensure his doesn’t happen, we can take matters into our own hands a little.

Follow Ask Bubbie for even more helpful tips.

You learn a lot about cooking when you work in restaurants.

Some people love cooking, some people hate it, and some see it as something to do so they don't starve. While the art and joy of cooking may be lost on some people, those who do enjoy it tend to have some secrets up their sleeves that might help the rest of us find the kitchen a more pleasant place to work.

Joshua Weissman is one of those people who loved cooking since he began cooking alongside his mother at age 3. He has since made a name for himself as a cookbook author, fine dining chef, and food educator with a huge following on YouTube. In one of his most popular videos, he shares 100 food hacks he learned working in restaurants, and there are so many gems that can make cooking easier, faster, and more fun.

- YouTubeyoutu.be

Here are some of the highlights:

Hack #1 - Washing produce with vinegar to make it last longer

Take three parts water and one part vinegar, add produce, swish, and let sit for 2-5 minutes. Drain, rinse, pat dry, and then store in the fridge.

Hack #4 - Peeling lots of garlic

He shares the bowl trick, where you put a bunch of unpeeled garlic cloves in a bowl, place a same-sized bowl upside down on top of it and shake vigorously. Theoretically, this peels all the garlic, but inevitably, it really only peels about half. Put some warm water over the ones that haven't peeled and let them sit for two minutes—the peel should then slide off easily.

Hack #5 - Bruise those fresh herbs before cooking

Before adding fresh herbs to a soup or sauce, give them a fierce squeeze in your hand to "bruise" them. This will release twice as much flavor, especially if you add them toward the end.

Hack #13 - Perfectly peeled eggs

We've all mangled a hard-boiled egg before. Weissman says to lightly crack your boiled egg, then roll it around and around on a hard surface until there are lots of tiny cracks, then submerge the egg in a bowl of water and peel under the water.

Hack #28 - Potato masher ground beef

That's it. Use a potato masher to smoosh your ground beef to break up all the big chunks. Works way better than a spoon or fork.

Hack #33 - Season high

High as in way above. Put the seasoning (salt, pepper, whatever) in your fingers and sprinkle it from a foot or so above the meat or whatever you're seasoning. This ensures the most even, maximum surface area seasoning.

Hack #45 - Peel ginger with a spoon

Instead of a peeler, which may take more of the ginger than you want it to, scrape ginger with the curved edge of a spoon. The spoon also makes it way easier to get around the little nubs and curves of the ginger root.

Hack #60 - Extend the life of fresh herbs that are going ick

If you have fresh herbs that are starting to go, wrap some string tightly around the end of the bunch and hang it somewhere with a little draft. They'll dry out and have a much longer life.

Hack #76 - Up your cooked veggie game

People often wonder how restaurants manage to get their cooked vegetables to taste so good. Weissman says it's quite simple— salt, lemon juice, and olive oil. Toss the veggies with them. That's it. "You'd be shocked how much that changes a finished cooked vegetable," he says.

Hack #81 - Make it easier to grate soft cheeses

Soft cheese like mozzarella or gouda can be hard to grate without making a gunky mess. But if you put the into the freezer for 15-30 minutes before grating. So much easier.

Hack #97 - For fluffy biscuits, it's all about how you cut the butter

Weissman says fluffy biscuits usually come down to how big your butter chunks are, and that people usually cut their butter into too small of chunks. Big cubes before cutting them into the dough and letting it be chunky will help you get the flakiness you desire.

There are so many more in Weissman's list of 100 that are helpful and useful for home cooks to know. (Especially if you cook a lot of meat or sauces—quite a few tips for those things in there.) Hopefully these hacks will make cooking a bit easier and more enjoyable for everyone.

You can follow Joshua Weissman on YouTube.