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The Gen X 'stay at home mom' crisis is real, but what's the solution?

Some moms in their 40s feel like they were lied to about what their "resume gap" would mean.

mom with school-aged daughter
Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash

40-something moms who stayed home to be with their kids are finding themselves in uncharted waters.

A few generations ago, parents had pretty clearly defined roles with the dad generally being the breadwinner and the mom being the homemaker and stay-at-home mother. Then, in 1848, the women's rights movement in the United States began with a powerful second wave coming in the 1960s and 70s, empowering women in the workplace, ushering in the era of two working parents, and producing an entire generation of "latchkey kids."

Now those Gen X latchkey kids are parenting Gen Z, with the pendulum of working motherhood having swung somewhat to the middle. We were raised to believe we could be anything we dreamed of being and that we didn't have to choose between being a mom and having a career. Gen X also became mothers during the heyday of parenting self-help books that impressed upon us the importance of attachment and hands-on childrearing, as well as the era of super-scheduled kids, whose activities alone require a full-time manager.

As a result, those of us in our 40s have raised our kids straddling two worlds—one where women can have all of the career success we desire and one where we can choose to be stay-at-home moms who run seemingly effortless households. At first, we were told we could have it all, but when the impossibility of that became clear, we were told, "Well, you can have it all, just not at the same time." But as many moms are finding as their kids start leaving the nest, even that isn't the full truth.

in 2023, a Facebook post by Karen Johnson, aka The 21st Century SAHM (short for "stay-at-home mom") nailed the reality many stay-at-home moms in their 40s are facing as they find themselves floundering with the glaring gap in their resumes.


"This is for all the moms in their 40s who put their careers on hold to do the SAHM thing because you knew you couldn't do both—career you loved and motherhood—and do both WELL, so you picked, saying to yourself, 'This is just for now and we'll see,'" Johnson wrote. "But now it's 15 years later and so much has changed in your career field that you know you can't go back. So really, when you 'took a break' all those years ago, you gave it up."

Johnson explained that yes, moms know they should be grateful for the time they've had with their kids. Most are. That's not the issue. Whether a woman chose to be a stay-at-home mom because she really wanted to or because childcare costs didn't work in the financial equation of the family, the transition out of it feels like completely uncharted waters.

"Okay, so you're looking for a 'career' with part-time hours and a 100% flexible schedule because you're still Mom-on-duty but you do have *just* enough hours during the day to reflect on the fact that you *do* have a college degree (maybe even 2) and although being a mom is the greatest and most important job in the world, you *might* actually want something more to your life than folding laundry and running hangry children to 900 events and remembering that they're all due for dental cleanings," she wrote.

Yup. The "default parent" role is real and weighted heavily toward moms as it is. For stay-at-home moms, it's 100% expected, and that doesn't suddenly end when it's time to start thinking about joining the workforce again.

And, of course, moms barely have time to try to figure all of this out.

woman in white long sleeve shirt holding brown and white labeled can

A working mom is the ultimate multitasker.

Photo by Memento Media on Unsplash

So, as Johnson says, "But for now, you cram yourself into the only pair of jeans you have right now that fit and find a t-shirt on the floor that isn't clean but isn't dirty and will pass for the 4 hours of mom-taxiing you're about to do and you tell yourself, 'I'll figure it out another day. Right now, I gotta get the kids to practice.'" Oof.

Johnson's entire post is worth a read, as it resonates with so many women at this stage of life. But just as telling are the comments from women who not only see themselves in Johnson's description but who feel like they were sold a bill of goods early in their motherhood. So many of us were led to believe that the skills and experiences of managing a family would be valued in the workplace simply because they should be and that the gap in their resume wouldn't matter.

"This hits hard. I am right there too. And all those volunteer hours & leadership positions people said would look good on my resume when I once again applied for jobs? Those people all lied. It means squat," wrote one person.

"Thank you! You spoke my heart. 42 this year, resigned from teaching almost 12 years ago, and never been more confused about my personal future, or exhausted in my present," shared another.

"I’ve never related to a post more in my life! THANK YOU. Your words perfectly summarize the loneliest, most important job in the world and how that perspective shifts in your 40s. It is confusingly beautiful," wrote another.

Some moms have chosen to see their post-stay-at-home era as a fresh start to learn something new, which might lend some inspiration to others.

woman carrying baby with two ladies beside her smiling

Beginnings are often rough, but that's okay.

Photo by Alexander Grey on Unsplash

There is hope in the comments, too.

"I went back for my master’s degree at 47 years old. I’m now 50 in a new career I love and my husband is doing just fine pulling his weight with after school/carpool/dinner. Happy for the years I stayed home, happy with this new season too," shared one person.

"Yuuuup. I decided to go back to grad school at 45. It’s insane but every term I complete I’m like - omg I’m doing it! So don’t let sweaty out of shape bodies and carpool fatigue stop you. I take naps and write grad school papers and have meltdowns where I cry from the frustration of it all - but dammit I’m doing it!" wrote another.

One mom who is past this stage also offered some words of encouragement:

"So incredibly well written. I feel all these things and did throughout my 40s. Now I'm in my early '50s and I'm so glad I was able to stay home with my kids, but the guilt! The guilt of not using my education, the judgment of people who don't understand why someone would stay home with their kids, the social engineering... We just eat each other alive sometimes don't we? I wouldn't trade it for anything, but it is a very lonely road and one you always question. I can tell you that all three of my kids were so grateful to have a full-time parent. I might not have always been the best, but they were glad to always have someone to talk to if they needed it. It's hard to fill other people's buckets when your bucket isn't full, but the rewards do come back when the kids tell you thank you for everything that you've done. ❤️"

Being a mom is hard, period. Working moms have it hard, stay-at-home moms have it hard, moms who have managed to keep one foot in the career door and one foot in the home have it hard. There's a lot that society could do to support moms more no matter what path they choose (or find themselves on—it's not always a conscious choice), from providing paid maternity leave to greater flexibility with work schedules to retirement plans that account for time away from the workplace. Perhaps that would at least make the many choices moms have today feel more like freedom and less like choosing between a rock and a hard place.


This article originally appeared two years ago.

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Ocean Wise
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Sustainability

Amazing ocean facts you never learned in school

Not even Captain Ahab knew this much about marine life.

Photo by Milos Prelevic on Unsplash
brown fish beside coral under body of water

The ocean covers more than 70 percent of our planet—yet there’s so much about it that we don’t yet know. Experts, in fact, believe we’ve only explored about five percent of the ocean so far—meaning that most of it remains completely unseen and undiscovered.

What we do know, however, is that the ocean is truly wise. Not only does it sustain all human and animal life on the planet, the creatures under the sea continue to give scientists insight that can transform human lives as well (just read about the amazing axolotl below to see what we mean).

A happy ocean makes for happy, healthy human beings (not to mention a healthy planet)—so this summer we’re helping our friends at Ocean Wise spread the word that no action is too small—holding a cleanup on a local shoreline, for instance. Learning about our ocean and all its wonders is another step anyone can take for conservation, so buckle in and prepare for a tidal wave of info that will blow your mind.

1. Playing music—specifically, recordings of healthy reef soundscapes—can help grow coral reef populations.

live coralsPhoto by QUI NGUYEN on Unsplash

Healthy coral reef populations are filled with diverse sounds, thanks to the fish, snapping shrimp, and other marine life that live there. Scientists have found that playing recorded sounds of healthy reefs actually attract coral larvae, since the sounds indicate a healthy, vibrant habitat. Using this knowledge, scientists have taken recorded reef sounds, played them near degraded reefs, and in doing so, have increased the settlement rates of coral larvae, helping the coral reefs regenerate.

2. Dolphins like to party with pufferfish.

Photo by Talia Cohen on Unsplash

How’s this for a good time? Dolphins, particularly younger ones, have been known to seek out pufferfish to play games with them, chewing on them and passing them back and forth between each other like a hacky sack. Not only is this entertainment for the dolphins, scientists theorize that they may intentionally be trying to get the pufferfish to give off a neurotoxin called tetrodotoxin (TTX)–which is a chemical they release when threatened. This chemical is highly toxic in large doses–but in small quantities, experts think that it might induce a mild, pleasurable effect in the dolphins, similar to a narcotic. Party on.

3. Male humpback whales are total crooners.

A male humpback whale breaches the water.

Photo by Thomas Kelley on Unsplash

All humpback whales can vocalize, but male humpback whales actually sing.

During mating season, scientists have observed male humpback whales making sounds that are distinctly different from other humpback calls. Unlike other sounds, these songs have a clear structure, and use small, repetitive “phrases” organized in a specific sequence—in the same way humans sing different verses during a song. Even more amazing? Male humpbacks all sing the same song together in “choruses,” in sessions that last from five minutes to several hours.

4. Axolotls have superpowers (and scientists think it could benefit humans one day).

a couple of animals that are in some waterPhoto by T K on Unsplash

Among biologists, axolotls are known for their ability to regrow lost or damaged tissue. When an adult axolotl loses a limb, they can actually grow it back in just a few months time, thanks to a substance they produce called retinoic acid, which plays a large role in regenerating skin cells. (If the name sounds familiar, it’s because retinoic acid is a derivative of Vitamin A, and it’s commonly found in skin creams.) While we already know that retinoic can make our skin look fabulous, scientists are currently studying whether it could someday help human limbs regrow, similar to the axolotl’s.

5. A healthy ocean can help reverse climate change

green algae underwater photographyPhoto by Brian Yurasits on Unsplash

The ocean generates half of the oxygen we breathe and absorbs nearly a third of the world’s carbon emissions. Phytoplankton, the microscopic algae that float near the ocean’s surface, are a big part of the reason why. But there’s another unsung hero—kelp. Unlike phytoplankton, kelp are large seaweeds that grow in dense underwater forests along coastlines, absorbing CO2 and supporting ecosystems. Ocean Wise is helping bring back these powerful carbon sinks one kelp forest at a time.

Help us #BeOceanWise by doing one small thing for ocean conservation in your community (because just one thing can start a huge wave of positive change). Visit ocean.orgfor tips and tricks to keep our oceans healthy because no action is too small.

Art

It took 14 years and 380 global embroiders to make one stunningly meaningful dress

A truly multicultural art project with style touches from 51 different countries.

Photos courtesy of The Red Dress project
Embroiderer Lekazia Turner wearing The Red Dress.

Few things bring people together more beautifully than art. Whether it's music, sculpture, paint or fabric, the arts are a way for us to express ourselves, our cultures and our common humanity. But rarely do we witness one singular piece of art truly encapsulating the creativity of our human family.

At first glance, the dress created for the Red Dress project is quite obviously stunning. It looks as though it could be worn by a royal—though a royal from where? The style, colors and patterns of the dress don't shout any particular country or culture; in fact, we can point to different elements of it and say it looks like it belongs on any continent.

There's a reason for that. The dress is made out of 84 pieces of burgundy silk dupion, which spent 14 years being sent around the world to be embroidered by 380 people from 51 countries—a truly global, multicultural creation.

Of those 380 embroiderers, about a third were commissioned artisans who were paid for their work and receive a portion of all ongoing exhibition fees. The rest were volunteers who contributed their stitches at events in various countries. Approximately 97% of the embroiderers were female.

British textile artist Kirstie Macleod conceived the project in 2009 as "an investigation into identity, with a desire to connect with women from the around without borders and boundaries." The basic design started as a sketch on the back of a napkin and has grown into a tangible garment that is not only a gorgeous work of art but a platform for women around the world and from all walks of life to express themselves and have their voices heard.

As shared on the project's website:

"Embroiderers include female refugees from Palestine and Syria, women seeking asylum in the UK from Iraq, China, Nigeria and Namibia, victims of war in Kosovo, Rwanda, and DR Congo; impoverished women in South Africa, Mexico, and Egypt; individuals in Kenya, Japan, Turkey, Sweden, Peru, Czech Republic, Dubai, Afghanistan, Australia, Argentina, Switzerland, Canada, Tobago, Vietnam, Estonia, USA, Russia, Pakistan, Wales, Colombia and England, students from Montenegro, Brazil, Malta, Singapore, Eritrea, Norway, Poland, Finland, Ireland, Romania and Hong Kong as well as upmarket embroidery studios in India and Saudi Arabia."

On Instagram, Kirstie Macleod shared a panel of the dress that was embroidered by two women in Kosovo, who shared some of their reflections on their experiences in the war there.

They stitched words into the birds they embroidered:

"Better one winter in your own country than a hundred springs away."

"The greatest wealth is to live content with little."

"Freedom has come. Love yourself first."

"Love all. Trust some. Hate none."

"A winter is a winter. Be nice, everyone."

"We live in peace now."

The creation of the dress began in 2009 and was completed in 2023. Each woman embroidered a piece of her own story into the dress, which contains millions of stitches. From established professional artisans to first-time embroiderers, the women were encouraged to share something that expressed their personal identities as well as their cultures. Some used traditional embroidery styles that had been practiced for hundreds of years where they are from. Others stitched in meaningful elements of their life stories. Some of the women are also using textile work to rebuild their lives and earn a consistent living.

The dress is on tour, being displayed in museums and galleries around the world. The photos showing women of various ages and ethnicities wearing the dress are made all the more moving knowing the history of how and by whom it was made.

In May 2025, a book detailing the dress's creation and journey around the world was published and can be found here.

Absolutely stunning. What a wonderful idea to connect women in a way that lets them share their stories and showcases and beautifully honors them.

This article first appeared three years ago and has been updated.

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Wellness

Hospice nurse reveals the exact time most people die and the reasons why are fascinating

It's called the "letting go hour"

Canva Photos

There is a three hour window of time when most dying people pass away.

Death is hard to think about and harder still to talk about. Some people get panic attacks just imagining the inevitable end of their life. It's an extremely uncomfortable and inescapable fact of living. For some people, learning as much as they can about what it's like and how it works is the one thing that brings them a little bit of comfort.

That's where Julie McFadden comes in. McFadden has been working as a hospice nurse for nine years. She has been educating people about the dying process on social media for almost as long, racking up millions of views with her gentle, reassuring, and highly informative FAQs.

In a recent video, Hospice Nurse Julie tackles a big, scary question: What time do people usually die? And can we actually predict someone's time of death?

"When is the most common time to die? I think you might be surprised what research says," she begins the video.

McFadden says even she was surprised when she started digging into the data and research. She noted that in her own work, she hasn't really seen a trend, but after poring through studies and speaking to colleagues throughout the hospice industry, she was taken aback to discover there was a clear answer to her question.

"Research and anecdotal evidence... it does show that most people die between 2 a.m. and 5 a.m.," she says. She explains that some professionals refer to this window as the "letting go hour."

Other studies and experts have a slightly different take, citing the most common time as 6 a.m.—8 a.m., or even peaking at 11 a.m. But the truth remains that there is a definitive pattern of a high percentage of people passing away in the wee hours of the morning or middle of the night.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

"So, why does that happen? That's where my brain went. And to me, the reason why is the most fascinating part," she explains.

There are a few different factors, McFadden says, that explain such a narrow death window. The first relates to the normal cycle of our body's energy and alertness.

"Biologically, we have a circadian rhythm... And between the hours of two and five, that is when our body's energy level is the lowest. Our temperatures drop, our blood pressure drops, and our breathing slows."

She mentions that those late night/early morning hours are also typically very quiet, without a lot of interruption and stimulation that might unwittingly keep a patient engaged with the outside world. "There's less people kind of trying to hold you there."

The dying person's personality also plays a role. McFadden says she sees over and over that some patients will wait until the entire family arrives before they "let go," while others will wait until things are quiet and they're alone. More outgoing people may wait to be surrounded before they pass, while introverts may prefer to pass in solitude. For the folks who prefer peace and quiet, those nighttime hours make a lot of sense.

death, dying, death doula, hospice, hospice nurse, mortality, aging, seniors, love, family, fear, afterlifeLearning about death is uncomfortable, but it helps us in the long run. Photo by Sijmen van Hooff on Unsplash

McFadden then shared a pretty wild story of a patient of hers who "chose" when to die. Viewers then chimed in with their own.

Most people who have lost a loved one absolutely insist that dying people are aware of, and have some level of control over, when they decide to let go. You should watch McFadden's video to hear her best story, but the comments were full of even more.

"My good friend Donna was dying in hospice from a brain tumor and a week before she passed things looked pretty grave so she wasn't expected to last another 2 days. Her sister was by her side and said it's okay you can go but she opened her eyes and said no I'm not going yet I'm waiting for my birthday, I'm dying on my birthday. Her birthday was a week away and no one thought she would make it but she did. Her sister whispered in her ear 'today is your Birthday Sis you made it' and then she passed within the hour," one user shared.

"My grandmother was actively dying for two weeks and held on until the wee hours of the first of the month. She was concerned about getting her social security check to help the family," said another.

"About a week before my 93 year old mom died, she adamently said a few times to me and others she was leaving the following Tuesday. At first I thought she meant she's going out... That Tuesday comes and it was clear she was probably not going to make it to end of the week. I was aware of her comments from the week before but didn't think it would happen that day. She died at 11:12 pm that night, on the day she said she was leaving. She knew."

"While not quite the same thing as 'predicted,' my mother said 'they' told her when she was going to pass away -- to the minute. 'They' being the people visiting her and promising to help her during her visioning experiences. She said they had shown her where she was going to go. She died at exactly the time her visioning-visitors had told her."

The stories shared by the hundreds in the comments to McFadden's video are heart-wrenching, but ultimately extremely hopeful.

@hospicenursejulie

Replying to @skinnysketch19 the transitioning phase #hospicenursejulie #caregiversoftiktok #dementia #education #medicaltok #learnontiktok #science #STEM

McFadden doesn't want her viewers who may have a loved one who's dying to be more anxious and nervous during the night, worrying and potentially losing sleep.

"People are going to do it when they do it. Their body is going to let go when the body is ready to let go. All you can do is be there for your loved one the best you can."

She reiterates that, even for someone like her who has seen and helped many patients cross over from this world to the next, that death is a mystery. As much as we can continue to learn and understand new aspects of it, we'll never fully know what it's like until we experience it ourselves.

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Parenting

Millennial dad of 3 unloads on boomer parents over their unreasonable holiday plans

"Yeah, not this time," he said. "I think for the holidays I'm just gonna stay in and relax."

via Canva/Photos
A Millennial dad has had it with his boomer dad's expectations.

The holidays are supposed to be a time for enjoying special moments with family, but often they become a source of stress. Traveling, navigating familial relationships and tensions, talking politics at the dinner table, and handling the all-encompassing issue of "presents" can wear down even the most patient and even-keeled person. It can be especially challenging for parents with young kids who are expected to travel long distances in the name of "family togetherness."

A TikTok video posted by @carrerasfam is going viral, with over 300,000 views, because so many millennial parents can relate to the frustration of grandparents having unrealistic expectations related to visiting with the kids.

In the satirical video, a husband stages a conversation with his "practically retired" baby boomer dad, in which he explains politely but firmly that he’s not taking his 3 young kids on a 400-mile drive to their house for the holidays.

Carerras Fam is a popular TikTok page about “all things postpartum and mamahood.” Together, the mom and dad share funny skits and slices of their life with three little ones.

The husband opens the conversation with his dad by explaining all the inconveniences of taking 3 young kids on a long road trip. “I know you want us to drive down for the holidays, but it's kinda ridiculous that you want me to pack my 3 kids with their portable beds with my clothes, their clothes, the formula, everything that goes on with raising 3 kids and having them feel comfortable. Drive down for over four hours just so that we could spend some time in your house?” the husband says while absurdist music plays in the background.


@carrerasfam

Sorry it’s just so much work. But you’re welcome to visit us #millennial #millennials #parents #parenting #parentsontiktok #boomers #millennials

It’s obviously inconvenient for the couple to pack up their kids and drive 4 hours, but it’s also unsafe because the house is not baby-proof. "I'm gonna have to run around, make sure that they don't break any of your stuff, and which you will 'take care of them,'” the husband continues using sarcastic air quotes. Most parents eventually realize that visiting with the kids does not equate to getting help with them — no, it means chasing them around frantically yourself until it's time to leave.

The dad brings up another great point: His parents are in good health, so why don’t they drive to their house? “You could visit. You don't have little kids,” the dad continues. “You don't have anything going on.

"Why is it that every time I have to make the effort for you, yet you can't do the most basic thing for me?”

millennials, baby boomers, parenting, dads, moms, babysitting, grandparents, parenting tips, family, love, kidsAll parents feel like this when it comes to spending time with the grands.Giphy

It’s clear from the phone call the dad understands that traveling with the kids and staying in a house that isn’t correctly set up for young kids will make the holiday a struggle. Instead of making memories, they’ll most likely be running around bent over trying to save their kids from breaking something or hanging out at Target buying electrical socket plugs and a bottle brush because they left theirs at home. What's especially frustrating is the pressure and expectations. Parents are often guilted for not wanting to pack up the the kids and travel, even though it's not hard to see why they hate it so much.

The video struck a chord with many millennial parents. Nearly 500,000 people watched the clip with hundreds and hundreds pouring in to vent their own similar frustrations.


@carrerasfam

Something needs to change #parenting #parents

“First holiday with a kid… parents are confused why I won’t drive 9 hours with a 3mnth old for Christmas,” too_many_catz writes.

“The ‘not baby proofed’ part hit my soullllllll. It’s so stressful having to chase your kids around and ask to close doors, move pictures, block stairs, etc. And nobody takes you seriously!" OhHeyItsIndy added.

It’s also expensive for young families to travel. “Add to it they want us to spend money on gas, airfare, etc. when we live paycheck to paycheck and rent while they own homes and live comfortably off a pension,” another user wrote.

"My mom asked me to drive 13 hours with our 2 month old…she doesn’t work and has flight points," one mom added.

This one hit hard: “They always act like you're asking the world of them, yet they will willingly go on any other vacation that they choose,” Mackenzie Byrne wrote.

"They can never make the trip for us but they can make them trips to Europe and cruises to the Caribbean," another user noted.

TX Travel Chick may have hit the nail on the head with her explanation for why boomer parents expect their children to road trip it to their house for the holidays. “Because we are used to following their orders!!! REVOLT,” she wrote.

millennials, baby boomers, parenting, dads, moms, babysitting, grandparents, parenting tips, family, love, kidsSee ya next year, grandpaGiphy

Ultimately, it would be interesting to learn why boomer parents want to inconvenience their kids when it would be much easier for them to take a trip to see them, especially if they can afford a hotel. One wonders if they are being entitled or if they’ve forgotten how hard it is to travel with young kids. In some cases, it's a little more complicated — many baby boomer grandparents are still working and have less time and resources than previous generations did to help with the kids.

"Yeah, not this time," the dad sums up in the video. "I think for the holidays I'm just gonna stay in and relax."

It's a hilarious and relatable video, but ultimately, it's a skit. The power of boomer-grandparent guilt remains undefeated in many households, so the smart money says the Carreras family sucked it up and traveled for the holidays despite their annoyance. Here's hoping that together, we can eventually break the generational curse when our kids become parents one day.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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Culture

Old people admit the 45 Gen Z and Alpha slang words they secretly love

"I love using Sus and Sketch and my kids hate me for it."

Image via Canva

Old people share their favorite slang from Gen Z and Gen Alpha.

Keeping up with the latest slang is no easy feat. For older people trying to stay fresh with the ever-changing Gen Alpha slang and Gen Z slang, they have their work cut out for them. But many are keeping up.

In a Reddit forum, member @Final-Work2788 posed the question: "What slang that's come out in the past five years do you have to admit is kind of awesome?"

Boomers, Gen Xers, and more happily shared the slang words that they're obsessed with. These are 45 Gen Alpha and Gen Z slang terms that older people secretly love.

"''Skills Issue'." —@GrimaceMusically

"FAFO [f*ck around find out]. So useful!!" —@PrimarySelection8619

"I will always adore, and use at every occasion, the vaunted word 'YEET'." —@5ilvrtongue

yeet, yeeted, yeet word, yeet slang, yeet gifRainbow Yes GIF by LumiGiphy

"Slaps. There’s a lot of good new slang out there but this term slaps." —@robotlasagna

"Thirsty." —@Gloomy_Obligation333

"I love using Sus and Sketch and my kids hate me for it." —@bladel

"'Mid' does it’s job perfectly. So short. Anything truly 'mid' doesn’t require any more time/verbiage. 'It’s mid,' move on." —@bitsonchips

"That’s a banger, referring to a song. Also the term glazing." —@haf2go

rizz, rizzler, rizz word, rizz slang, rizz termKids Dancing GIFGiphy

"I like rizz. It reminds of the Putting on the Ritz scene from Young Frankenstein." —@Niniva73

"Younger Aussies are saying 'cossie livs' for 'cost of living' issues. If you can't afford something it's 'cossie livs'. We'll make slang out of anything." —@Mash_man710

"I am Gen X. I love the term crashed out, or crashing out. My daughters say I am not allowed to use it though. I am not sure if it is a cultural appropriation thing or if they just think it’s cringe when I say it. I love it though. It’s very descriptive." —@Neat-Client9305

crash out, crashed out, crashing, crashin out, crash out slangFreak Out Rage GIFGiphy

"I love 'Menty B' for mental breakdown lol." —@philmajohnson

"'…with your whole chest'." —@Ok-Scallion9885

"I love Gen Z slang. Rizz is so creative. Gyat is hilarious. I have a son in middle school so I hear a lot of it. I’m Gen X and think it’s much cooler than what we came up with." —@HairyHorseKnuckles

"'Deplorean' for a Cybertruck, even though I am a Tesla owner. I don't hate Cybertrucks, I just think it's funny." —@AJ_Mexico

"Fire." —@keepsummersafe55

fire, that's fire, that's fire, gif, fire slang, fire wordShark Tank Rohan GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy

"I'm Cooked...as in sick or in a bad way." —@Scottishdog1120

"Oh, so many!
--Mid
--Okay, no
--Situationship
--Ded (and, the skull and crossbones emoji instead of LOL)
--that ATE (also: 'Ate and left no crumbs')
--era ('villain era')
--lowkey
--deadass
--SLAPS
--dripped out
--turnt
--a snack ('Girl looking like a SNACK')
--IYKYK." —@CatCafffffe

ate, ate slang, ate gif, she ate, ate termGIF by RuPaul's Drag RaceGiphy

"Enshittification." —@Numerous_Problems

"Cap and no cap." —@ContributionOk9927

no cap, cap, cap gif, no cap slang, cap slangPaul Rudd Wear A Mask GIF by GIPHY NewsGiphy

"Cringe. It's perfect." —@meekonesfade

"Pedestrian. This one sums it up." —@PigpenD27870

"I kind of like deadass meaning for-real or I-shit-you-not. I’m too old to know if it’s within the last five years though." —@Tom__mm

deadass, deadass slang, deadass word, deadass phrase, deadass gifBlac Chyna GIFGiphy

"Skibidi is fun to say." —@BrooklynDoug

"Ohio. I lived there for six years and can confirm, it's Ohio." —@those_ribbon_things

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A: 'Bet, Bet!'
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A: 'Bet.'" —@SomeMidnight


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Woman spots the 2 ways everybody 'smiles differently now' and it's impossible to unsee

"How did everybody master this?"

Photo credit: Canva

We've been changing our smiles since the dawn of humanity, really.

A woman named Mitchie Nguyen wants to know: “How did everyone suddenly master new smiles?”

In a now-viral clip posted to her TikTok, Nguyen recalled how, “back in her heyday,” you really only had one of two options: either a full on, ear-to-ear teeth baring smile, or the demure closed mouth grin. That’s it.

But lo and behold, there are now two more smile styles, Nguyen noted. One is very similar to the full one, teeth baring smile, only…lazier, you could say? Sort of a half-smile that doesn’t quite reach the canines. It’s hard to explain, and apparently even harder to demonstrate unless you’ve practiced it—because Nguyen tries, and fails to accurately replicate it.

The second is what she called the “mouth-breathing” smile, which, honestly isn’t really a smile at all, arguably. It's just a partially opened mouth as though you were, well, breathing through your mouth. This is the style of “smile” Nguyen said she sees most prevalent in “get ready with me videos.”

@_misomelon when did everyone stop closing their mouths
♬ original sound - mitchie

So, what has caused this new set of smirks? Commenters had theories.

Primarily, people guessed that the uptick of fillers, veneers and “lip flips”—where Botox is injected into the top lip to create the illusion of a fuller, more defined lip—to be the culprit.

“A lot of people have filler or a lip flip and literally can’t close their mouth lol,” one person wrote.

“It’s not that they stopped, it’s that they can’t lol,” another quipped.

There is potentially some validity to this theory. Even experts say that injectables can alter a smile, for better or for worse, depending on the skill of the injector. Some people, such as those with “gummy smiles,” are also getting procedures to specifically change their smile.

However, we might be coming to a time where people are more comfortable smiling in a way that feels right to them, anatomically speaking, rather than forcing a big wide-eyed grin. Several people with overbites chimed in to note how hard it is to actually keep the mouth closed.

“I think it’s honestly just mouth shape! I used to hate my smile until I realized I can smile with only my top teeth. I have an overbite so maybe that’s why? it’s what they do naturally. If I force a smile with full teeth, I look like a monster & do not look happy,” wrote one viewer.

More than anything, the fact that we even have viral “smile trend discussions” is just another example of how selfie culture has really shaped our collective awareness of aesthetics. Once upon a time, smiling in photos was seen as “undignified.” Fast forward to the tongue behind the teeth trend to make as big and playful a smile as possible (remember that?)


@tinx Replying to @Katelyn Brown #posing ♬ original sound - Tinx


Then there's the tongue over the teeth method. Which is supposed to give off a fun and sultry vibe. But it also just leaves a few folks confused.

Bottom line, the pendulum always seems to go back and forth between "smiling for the camera" and showing your authentic smile." Maybe there is no right way to do it. Thankfully, we also live in a day and age where you can take multiple pictures with multiple smiles to see which one works best for you.

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