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Woman asks her dad who he loves more: his kids or his grandkids. His answer is touching.

"Ask your parent questions. They might be very healing."

dad of tiktok, grandparents, inner child healing
@finding_torrie/TikTok

"Ask your parents questions. They might be very healing."

Sometimes our parents can surprise us with the most meaningful insight, heartfelt compliment or some other completely unexpected display of love. These moments might be rare to some more than others, but when they do happen, they can be profound.

A woman named Torrie just had one of those deeply impactful moments with her father, and a video telling the story of their heartwarming interaction has gone viral online.

Torrie had asked her parents who they loved more: their kids or their grandkids. Considering the well documented phenomenon of grandparents often being closer—even nicer—to their grandkids, perhaps Torrie was expecting to hear the latter. Maybe she anticipated hearing a joke about how the grandkids are less of a handful or any other number of insensitive half-jokes.

Much to her surprise, Her father gave a response that was thoughtful and comforting all at the same time.

“He said, ‘Not more, but different,’” she recalled. "‘When I look at your daughter, my grandchild, I don't see her the way you see her, I see her as a whole person.’”

Torrie was initially confused by this statement, so her father explained how seeing her go from childhood to adulthood gave him a future glimpse of what his granddaughter would eventually be like.

@finding_torrie 😩 #innerchildhealing #parenting ♬ The Night We Met - Marianne Beaulieu

“And he said, ‘I've seen firsthand you go from a baby to a woman, and I've known all of the ‘yous’ in between,’” she continued. And so, "When he looks at my daughter, he not only sees this beautiful baby, he sees and loves everything she is and ever will be because he's already seen it in me.”

Getting emotional, Torrie concludes: “Ask your parents questions. their answers might be really healing.” She even captioned the clip #innerchildhealing

While several viewers noted that Torrie’s experience certainly would not be the case for their own parental interactions, everyone agreed the video was touching nonetheless.

“I can confirm that it will not be healing but I love this for you and your dad must be protected at all costs,” one person wrote.

Some even made jokes about how unfathomable it was to have a parent like Torrie’s. “Where you get parents like that? Can you get that on Amazon? 😭😭❤️❤️” one person quipped.

Still, for many who didn’t have that kind of relationship with their folks, simply seeing that kind of love in action was its own kind of soul medicine.

“What’s healing for me is knowing that there are people who have truly loving parents. Please thank your dad for me 💓,” one person shared.

In a follow-up video, Torrie clarified that her relationship with her father was far from perfect. They had also spent years “working through trauma” to achieve that level of emotional intelligence and arrive at this strong connection.

But clearly, the work has paid off. In another video, Torrie shared the text exchange with her dad talking about how her video had gone viral. She told him how lucky she felt to have him as a dad and how much she valued the conversations they’ve been able to have after those years of work.

Her dad’s response? “Me too. It would be quite an accomplishment NOT to love a daughter like you to the moon and back.”

@finding_torrie Replying to @Straw🍓 ♬ Belonging - Muted

Yeah. Suddenly the world doesn’t feel like such a cold and lonely place after all. Sometimes our parents can surprise us. But even if they can’t, sometimes seeing others heal can be healing.

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Meet the 18-year-old advocating for teen mental health, one inspiring podcast at a time

All images provided by Prudential Emerging Visionaries

Collins after being selected by Prudential Emerging Visionaries

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A changemaker is anyone who takes creative action to solve an ongoing problem—be it in one’s own community or throughout the world.

And when it comes to creating positive change, enthusiasm and a fresh perspective can hold just as much power as years of experience. That’s why, every year, Prudential Emerging Visionaries celebrates young people for their innovative solutions to financial and societal challenges in their communities.

This national program awards 25 young leaders (ages 14-18) up to $15,000 to devote to their passion projects. Additionally, winners receive a trip to Prudential’s headquarters in Newark, New Jersey, where they receive coaching, skills development, and networking opportunities with mentors to help take their innovative solutions to the next level.

For 18-year-old Sydnie Collins, one of the 2023 winners, this meant being able to take her podcast, “Perfect Timing,” to the next level.

Since 2020, the Maryland-based teen has provided a safe platform that promotes youth positivity by giving young people the space to celebrate their achievements and combat mental health stigmas. The idea came during the height of Covid-19, when Collins recalled social media “becoming a dark space flooded with news,” which greatly affected her own anxiety and depression.

Knowing that she couldn’t be the only one feeling this way, “Perfect Timing” seemed like a valuable way to give back to her community. Over the course of 109 episodes, Collins has interviewed a wide range of guests—from other young influencers to celebrities, from innovators to nonprofit leaders—all to remind Gen Z that “their dreams are tangible.”

That mission statement has since evolved beyond creating inspiring content and has expanded to hosting events and speaking publicly at summits and workshops. One of Collins’ favorite moments so far has been raising $7,000 to take 200 underserved girls to see “The Little Mermaid” on its opening weekend, to “let them know they are enough” and that there’s an “older sister” in their corner.

Of course, as with most new projects, funding for “Perfect Timing” has come entirely out of Collins’ pocket. Thankfully, the funding she earned from being selected as a Prudential Emerging Visionary is going toward upgraded recording equipment, the support of expert producers, and skill-building classes to help her become a better host and public speaker. She’ll even be able to lease an office space that allows for a live audience.

Plus, after meeting with the 24 other Prudential Emerging Visionaries and her Prudential employee coach, who is helping her develop specific action steps to connect with her target audience, Collins has more confidence in a “grander path” for her work.

“I learned that my network could extend to multiple spaces beyond my realm of podcasting and journalism when industry leaders are willing to share their expertise, time, and financial support,” she told Upworthy. “It only takes one person to change, and two people to expand that change.”

Prudential Emerging Visionaries is currently seeking applicants for 2024. Winners may receive up to $15,000 in awards and an all-expenses-paid trip to Prudential’s headquarters with a parent or guardian, as well as ongoing coaching and skills development to grow their projects.

If you or someone you know between the ages of 14 -18 not only displays a bold vision for the future but is taking action to bring that vision to life, click here to learn more. Applications are due by Nov. 2, 2023.
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We've all been through it.

It was only yesterday when a friend and I (two women in the 30-to-40-year-old range) were having a conversation, and this friend made more than one wistful comment about being “skinny and sexy” once upon a time.

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Husband's secret checklist for his wife's daily tasks has people debating healthy boundaries

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Canva

Was he in the wrong?

A husband anonymously sought out the help of the Reddit community to see if he was in the wrong for keeping calendar reminders to ask his wife about stuff going on in her life.

On the popular “Am I The A**hole” subreddit, he explained that checking in and staying aware was something his wife was really good at, but something he struggled to maintain. He attributed part of it to what he called being “a fairly self-centered person.”

“I wish that weren't the case,” he wrote. “But in retrospect a lot of bad behavior on my part was not corrected and even enabled when I was young. By the time I realized this character flaw I was already well into adulthood and I have found that old habits die hard.”

And now, in adulthood, this man found himself “getting lost in his own stuff” and forgetting about his partners. So in an effort to be better, he started secretly making reminders in his calendar.

It was a strategy working “really well,” the man wrote.

That is, until his wife found out.

“She definitely found it weird and off-putting that I would need a system like that when she doesn't,” the OP lamented. “I kind of agree with her. It never felt like a deep dark secret, but on the other hand there's obviously a reason I never told her or anyone else I was doing it.”

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marriage, husband, pleasing your wife, relationships

"Taking action has to be better than forgetting, right?"

Canva

People who read his story were inclined to agree.

“I think it's really sweet that you took the steps to help your wife feel valued,” one person wrote, suggesting that the situation might just need further communication. “I'd sit your wife down and let her know that this has helped you engage with her more and to learn more about how she's feeling.”

Quite a few noted that forgetfulness isn’t always something people can control, especially for those who are neurodivergent. So putting systems in place like calendar reminders isn’t actually a moral failing, but simply a different way of organizing important information.

“I’m married and have ADHD. I write EVERYTHING I can down bc I will not remember until it’s too late if I don’t…I would try to frame it as a tool you have used to try to better yourself for your relationship. Tell her you reflected on yourself and didn’t like what you saw. Then tried to do something to correct it so you could be a better partner,” one person commented.

One person even noted that they wished their partner did something like what the OP did.

“I'd love if my partner did something like this. We have had multiple arguments, because I remember everything, while he cannot remember the time he works the next day. So sometimes if I don't remind him, he will forget things, and it hurts,” they wrote.

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Putting in the effort is never a bad thing!

Canva

All in all, folks agreed that this husband was not in the wrong (or “Not The A**hole, in Reddit speak) for his check-in reminders, and that it would probably just take another conversation for his wife to fully understand where he was coming from.

As one person put it: “I think we can all tell that your wife and your relationship means a lot to you, and I think it's great that you came up with something like that, and hopefully your wife will after this, too. It shows you care. Most people never develop systems for that, and their relationships deteriorate because of it.”

No two brains really think alike. And boy do we realize this in relationships. Even when we’re lucky enough to find that soul mate that seems to “get” us on a deeper level, there are still going to be ways our partners operate that seem completely foreign to us. But that isn’t nearly as important as whether or not a partner can take accountability, and put in the work to be the best partner they can be.

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