Dad perfectly explains why he wants his kids' teenage friends to hang out at his house
'Be that house!'

Every group of teenage friends usually has that one house with the “cool parents” where everyone can hang out. It’s usually a place where there isn’t much judgment but plenty of snacks and a teen-friendly place to hang like a garage, living room or basement.
There are two types of parents who don’t mind having teens over all the time. One type allows the kids to drink and party because, “you’re gonna do it anyway, might as well do it here.” The other kind likes having kids around so they can be sure they don’t get into that type of trouble.
Jeremy Serrano, a Lutheran pastor in Northern California who has three children ages 12, 15 and 17, recently went viral on TikTok for explaining why parents should strive to “Be that house!” where kids hang out.
@jeremypserrano Be that house! #parenting #parentsoftiktok #progressiveclergy
"I was talking to another parent the other day and they asked me, 'Why do you always have teenagers over at your house?'" Serrano said on TikTok. "One of the things that we've worked really hard on is being the house that the teenage friends of my children want to hang out at."
The Serrano house is a teenagers’ paradise. It’s stocked with snacks and has an ax-throwing target, basketball hoop and trampoline.
"My wife and I, we intentionally ask our children's friends what kind of food and drinks they like and then we make sure that we have those things on hand for them," he said in the video.
"It's just one of the best things that we've ever done," added Serrano. "Because we get to know our kids' friends and then we know that they're hanging out here."
The house may be a place where kids can let loose, but there’s no illicit partying happening. "We have boundaries and don't allow that here," he told Today. "In fact, I'd lose credibility with my children by not providing boundaries."
The TikTok post received a lot of positive comments from people who loved growing up in “that house.”
"My mother law told me once… food, drinks, and activities will always be cheaper than lawyers, legal fees, and therapists," anmccoy74 wrote. "This was my house growing up and my mom said that when I went away to college she lost not just one son but more like 5 sons," Gridpod added.
"I've always said I want to be the house the kids go hang out at so I can be a trusted place for them but most importantly my kids tell me their lives," Addie Davis wrote.
Serrano told Today that the teens are comfortable coming to him for advice because of the open environment he’s created. "I was really honored that my children pointed their friends to me—the first time it happened I was like, 'Whoa that is a big deal,'" he said. "My rule is, they can share our conversations with anyone they want, but I won't. If their parents ask if we've talked, I won't lie, but I'll point them back to their children."
After his post went viral, the pastor posted a subsequent video where he shared some tips on how to create “that house.”
@jeremypserrano Replying to @moeffinmary tip#1 be a non judgmental presence. #parenting #parentingtips
"I think the number one way to be ‘that house’ is to be parents that provide a non-judgmental presence and non-judgmental listening to your kids' friends,” Serrano said.
He added that it’s important to "really get to know their sides of things. To really try to understand how they're feeling in response to situations.” Serrano says parents shouldn’t think of what the teens are saying as “good or bad” but just to “be there and listen to them."
In the end, having “that house” is all about creating a great environment for the entire family. "We get to be involved in our children's lives," he says. "And provide a safe space among chaos in the world."
This article originally appeared on 1.4.23
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There's a reason why some people can perfectly copy accents, and others can't
Turns out, there's a neurodivergent link.
A woman in black long sleeve shirt stands in front of mirror.
Have you ever had that friend who goes on vacation for four days to London and comes back with a full-on Queen's English posh accent? "Oooh I left my brolly in the loo," they say, and you respond, "But you're from Colorado!" Well, there are reasons they (and many of us) do that, and usually it's on a pretty subconscious level.
It's called "accent mirroring," and it's actually quite common with people who are neurodivergent, particularly those with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). According Neurolaunch, the self-described "Free Mental Health Library," "Accent mirroring, also known as accent adaptation or phonetic convergence, is the tendency to unconsciously adopt the accent or speech patterns of those around us. This linguistic chameleon effect is not unique to individuals with ADHD, but it appears to be more pronounced and frequent in this population."
Essentially, when people have conversations, we're constantly "scanning" for information—not just the words we're absorbing, but the inflection and tone. "When we hear an accent, our brains automatically analyze and categorize the phonetic features, prosody, and intonation patterns," writes Neurolaunch. For most, this does result in copying the accent of the person with whom we're speaking. But those with ADHD might be more sensitive to auditory cues. This, "coupled with a reduced ability to filter out or inhibit the impulse to mimic…could potentially explain the increased tendency for accent mirroring."
While the article explains further research is needed, they distinctly state that, "Accent mirroring in individuals with ADHD often manifests as an unconscious mimicry of accents in social situations. This can range from subtle shifts in pronunciation to more noticeable changes in intonation and speech rhythm. For example, a person with ADHD might find themselves unconsciously adopting a Southern drawl when conversing with someone from Texas, even if they’ve never lived in the South themselves."
People are having their say online. On the subreddit r/ADHDWomen, a thread began: "Taking on accents is an ADHD thing?" The OP shares, "My whole life, I've picked up accents. I, myself, never noticed, but everyone around me would be like, 'Why are you talking like that??' It could be after I watched a show or movie with an accent or after I've traveled somewhere with a different accent than my 'normal.'
They continue, "Apparently, I pick it up fast, but it fades out slowly. Today... I'm scrolling Instagram, I watch a reel from a comedian couple (Darcy and Jeremy. IYKYK) about how Darcy (ADHD) picks up accents everywhere they go. It's called ADHD Mirroring??? And it's another way of masking."
(The OP is referring to Darcy Michaels and his husband Jeremy Baer, who are both touring comedians based in Canada.)
Hundreds of people on the Reddit thread alone seem to relate. One comments, "Omfg I've done this my whole life; I'll even pick up on the pauses/spaces when I'm talking to someone who is ESL—but English is my first language lol."
Sometimes, it can be a real issue for those around the chameleon. "I accidentally mimicked a waitress's weird laugh one time. As soon as she was out of earshot, my family started to reprimand me, but I was already like 'oh my god I don’t know why I did that, I feel so bad.'"
Many commenters on TikTok were shocked to find out this can be a sign of ADHD. One jokes, "Omg, yes, at a store the cashier was talking to me and she was French. She's like 'Oh are you French too? No, I'm not lol. I'm very east coast Canada."
And some people just embrace it and make it work for them. "I mirror their words or phrase! I’m 30. I realized I start calling everyone sweetie cause my manager does & I work at coffee shop."