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Anxious mom-to-be asked what parents ‘love about having children’ and the responses were beautiful

“I think the reason it seems like parenthood is all bad is it’s easy to describe the bad parts and impossible to describe the good parts because they are so good they are other-worldly.”

By

Tod Perry

By

Upworthy Staff

Array
Photo credit: via PixaBay – Twitter users agree that parenting is more joy than work.

The thought of having children can be overwhelming for a lot of people. People who have kids often warn those without them that their kid is going to take over their entire life. They complain that children are extremely expensive and that you’ll never get a good night’s sleep until the child has turned 4.

Now, I have a 5-year-old and the only thing that’s really true is that children cost a lot of money. A big chunk of the cash you spend on a kid is for food. Mine never stops eating. He eats as much as I do and I’m a 45-year-old man.

I hear him say, “Dad, I’m hungry. Can I have some food?” at least six times a day.

I also don’t think that children take over your entire life unless you let them. It’s a sliding scale. When they’re a newborn, they own 90% of your life and you only have the remaining 10%. But, by the time they’re 5, you get about half your life back. While that still seems pretty sad, it’s not a huge problem. Having kids teaches you to be a lot better at time management and to take advantage of free time when it’s available.

When it comes to sleep, smart parents sleep train their kids at a young age so that everyone in the family can get a good night’s rest. It’s not easy, but it pays huge dividends.

Rose Stokes, an award-winning freelance columnist in London, recently learned that she is pregnant and was very anxious about having a kid because of all the things she’s heard from people with kids. So she took to Twitter to ask parents to tell her what they “love about having children” to give her a more positive perspective.

Stokes received a ton of incredibly positive responses from people who truly love having children. They eased her mind by telling her that she would experience the greatest love of her life after having children. They told her that being a parent is one of the funniest experiences she’ll ever have.

The parents of Twitter also made an important point: Children make you a better person. I always think about parenting as a stress test on your personality. If you want to know what’s wrong with you, have a kid. You’ll quickly figure out all of your weaknesses. The good thing is that once we know our weaknesses we can fix them.

Here are some of the best responses to Stoke’s question: “Parents of Twitter, what big or small things do you love about having children?”

It’s hard to describe what it’s like to have a child.

There are a lot of joyous moments.

Children change your perspective.

It’s hard but worthwhile.

It’s not as hard as people say.

They make you a better person.

They’re fun and funny.

The great thing about asking a wide swath of humanity about a common experience is that you get so many great perspectives on the matter. Some parents shared the emotional experiences that come with having children. While others focused on how kids can fundamentally change your life. After reading through most of the responses, I think that Stokes probably got a clear idea about what having a child is like.

Well done, Twitter.


This article originally appeared on 2.4.22

















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  • Mom gives a tour of her typical ‘middle-class home’ and it’s exactly what people needed
    A mom gave a revealing tour of her 'middle class' home.
    ,

    Mom gives a tour of her typical ‘middle-class home’ and it’s exactly what people needed

    A house tour we can all relate to.

    Heather Wake

    Upworthy Staff

    Sure, it’s lovely to see pristine, perfectly curated homes that look like they belong in Architectural Digest. A little inspo never hurt anyone. But as we all know, the spotless life is simply not an achievable reality, especially for those with busy lives and limited budgets (read: most of us).

    But you know what? Maybe even the messy homes deserve some love. The ones with constant junk piles, unfinished projects, dirty dishes, and misplaced toys. The homes that will never grace the cover of a magazine but still do a wonderful job of containing all the moments life has to offer—the big, small, extraordinary, mundane, and everywhere in between. ‘Cause at the end of the day, isn’t that a home’s true purpose anyway?

    One mom decided to show it all, unfiltered

    @stephsharesitall

    Lets normalize “average” because there is nothing wrong with it. Everywhere you look on social media you see big gorgeous houses in perfect condition and its hard not to compare yours to them. But its not the norm and half the time its staged. Our house is lived in, and its filled with love and tons of memories and at the end of the day thats all that matters.

    ♬ vampire – Olivia Rodrigo

    Stephanie Murphy, a mom and TikTok creator, seems to think so. Murphy took viewers on an “average house tour,” and it was the exact opposite of aspirational. Highlighted in Murphy’s tour are the pantry door that’s remained unpainted for three years, blinds held together with binder clips, air conditioners held in place by duct tape, a full dish rack tray that’s “a permanent fixture” on their countertops, and not one but two junk drawers (honestly, that’s a little low by my count). You’ll also notice a fridge that is covered in her kid’s artwork and school pictures. Not in any cohesive way, but merely thrown on randomly, as nature intended.

    Meanwhile, in the master bedroom, Murphy and her husband have two separate blankets on their bed because neither of them like to share. A genius idea, and just another example of how we really, really don’t need to continue with marital sleeping norms that don’t actually feel comfortable.

    Her reason for sharing it is everything

    As for why Murphy decided to showcase her “average, middle-class house,” it’s all in the caption of her video: “Let’s normalize ‘average’ because there is nothing wrong with it. Everywhere you look on social media, you see big gorgeous houses in perfect condition and it’s hard not to compare yours to them. But it’s not the norm and half the time it’s staged. Our house is lived in, and it’s filled with love and tons of memories and at the end of the day that’s all that matters.”

    She further explained her reasoning to Good Morning America. “I feel like social media is full of one perfectly curated video after another, and there is just so much pressure from social media to be perfect in all aspects — to have perfect skin, perfect makeup, perfect outfit, perfect house. And the reality is no one’s perfect,” Murphy said.

    “Honestly, I feel like there’s a very good chance that all those videos that we see were staged and they probably like, moved a pile of toys behind the camera to film and then moved it back when they were done. But that’s the part that people on social media just aren’t sharing. They don’t show you the behind-the-scenes and that is what I was looking to change,” she continued.

    @sarahbondseats

    Normal, non-aesthetic home tour for a family of 4. #normalhouse #regularmom #housetour #homedecor #homedecorideas

    ♬ Second Chances – Gregory Alan Isakov

    People saw this and felt completely seen

    Judging from the comments sections of this viral post, it seems like other people are ready for more average content.

    “This is awesome! I’m constantly feeling inadequate when people have a perfect house that looks like nobody lives there!” one person wrote. “I feel seen,” added another.

    Hear, hear. No need to feel inadequate about having a home that’s lived in. Imperfection has its own kind of beauty.

    This article originally appeared three years ago. It has been updated.

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  • Kasai and Klarity on the rise, Emma on the outs in Social Security’s new baby-name rankings
    Photo credit: Canva – A sad baby and a happy baby.
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    Kasai and Klarity on the rise, Emma on the outs in Social Security’s new baby-name rankings

    Liam and Olivia remain unchallenged at number one.

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    As they do every year around Mother’s Day, the Social Security Administration released its list of the top 1,000 most popular baby names. The SSA is uniquely positioned to track the rise and fall of baby names because it collects information on every baby born in the United States.

    The 2025 list found no major changes among the top 10 names for girls and boys. Olivia and Liam again held the number one spots in the rankings, as they have for the past seven years. The biggest changes were among girls’ names, where Charlotte rose to second place, ending Emma’s six-year run in the spot. Ava dropped out of the top 10 and was replaced by Eliana.

    baby, newborn, happy baby, smiling baby, babies
    Three babies. Photo credit: Canva

    No big changes in the top 10s for 2025

    No big changes for the boys, where the top four remained unchanged: Liam, Noah, Oliver, and Theodore.

    Boys’ names

    1. Liam
    2. Noah
    3. Oliver
    4. Theodore
    5. Henry
    6. James
    7. Elijah
    8. Mateo
    9. William
    10. Lucas

    Girls’ names

    1. Olivia
    2. Charlotte
    3. Emma
    4. Amelia
    5. Sophia
    6. Mia
    7. Isabella
    8. Evelyn
    9. Sofia
    10. Eliana
    baby, newborn, happy baby, crying baby, babies
    A crying baby. Photo credit: Canva

    When it comes to the names rising fastest in popularity, there were some decidedly unconventional choices rocketing up the charts. There also appears to be a clear trend toward names with a strong “K” sound.

    Names that are rapidly gaining in popularity

    Boys’ names

    1. Kasai
    2. Akari
    3. Eziah
    4. Jasai
    5. Neithan

    Girls’ names

    1. Klarity
    2. Rynlee
    3. Ailanny
    4. Naylani
    5. Madisson
    baby, newborn, happy baby, smiling baby, babies
    A happy baby. Photo credit: Canva

    Kasai made the greatest leap among boys’ names, moving up 1,108 spots on the list to land at 639. Kasai means “fire” in both Japanese and Swahili. Although the name is a fast mover in the boys’ category, it has also been used as a girls’ name. It’s believed that the name is rising in popularity due to actress Skai Jackson naming her baby Kasai and the popularity of entrepreneur and rapper Kasai Guthrie.

    Klarity’s origins are a bit more obvious: it’s “Clarity” with a twist, spelled with a K instead of a C. “A rediscovered virtue name with a modern makeover, Klarity has the zippy sounds of Felicity along with the familiar feel of Kate, Katie, Kitty, and Klara,” Nameberry writes.

    Akari is another name with Japanese origins, meaning “star” or, depending on how it’s written, “moon,” “bright,” “light,” or “red jewel.” It’s a rapidly rising boys’ name, but it’s also used for girls.

    Rynlee is a modern construction that follows the current trend of using popular names, such as Ryan, and adding a -lee or -leigh suffix. Alternative spellings include Rynleigh and Rinlee.

    Another unique name is Jasai. It’s a modern take on the traditional name “Jason” and may have ancient Hindi or Sanskrit origins, meaning “victory” or “achievement.” On the girls’ side, Ailanny appears to be a recent creation centered on the opening sound “Ai,” which is often associated with love and affection.

    You can access the SSA’s full name database here. 

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  • Pregnant journalist spun around to smack her co-host. But he wasn’t the one who poked her.
    Photo credit: Tiktok.com/@janai | ABC News – Newscasters on air laugh together.
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    Pregnant journalist spun around to smack her co-host. But he wasn’t the one who poked her.

    “Oh… I am sorry, I got kicked, and I thought you poked me. I was ready to swat you.”

    Adam Albright-Hanna

    Upworthy Staff

    Janai Norman (@janai) was about to go on-air with her ABC News co-host Kenneth Moton when she felt something poke her pregnant belly. Hard.

    She spun around at full speed, ready to smack Moton for messing with her. Then she realized he was standing several feet away, completely innocent, and had no idea what was happening.

    “Oh… I am sorry, I got kicked, and I thought you poked me. I was ready to swat you,” Norman said, seconds before dissolving into laughter.

    @janai

    #pregnancy #mom #throwback @KennethMoton

    ♬ original sound – Janai Norman

    The baby had kicked so hard it felt exactly like someone pressing a finger into her belly. Moton cracked up. “The baby is like, ‘Watch this,’” he joked.

    Norman shared the throwback moment on TikTok on March 30, and the video has been viewed 5.8 million times. The comments are full of other pregnant people confirming that yes, some kicks absolutely feel like someone jabbing you from the outside.

    “I know exactly which kind of ‘poke’ kick she felt! It’s not a normal baby kick! It legit feels like a big finger poke,” one person wrote.

    Another said, “I know exactly what that kick felt like lol. I don’t even know if it’s a kick or some weird placenta movement, but it happens sometimes when I yawn or stretch. It feels like something poked you hard as f**k. It makes me jump every time.”

    Someone else confessed, “Every time my baby would kick me, I always thought my phone was getting a notification, lol.”

    One commenter pointed out that Norman’s instant protective reaction was actually kind of sweet: “She’s going to be a great mom; she went right into protector mode.”

    The whole thing happened in the span of maybe three seconds, but it perfectly captures one of the weirder parts of being pregnant. Your body does things you have zero control over, and sometimes those things are so startling you almost clock your coworker on live television.

    Moton dodged a bullet. The baby, meanwhile, was probably just stretching.

    Follow Janai Norman (@janai) on TikTok for more lifestyle content. 

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  • Mom admits she isn’t perfect in a hilarious self-made ‘back-to-school’ sign
    First day of school can be exhausting … but for who?
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    Mom admits she isn’t perfect in a hilarious self-made ‘back-to-school’ sign

    She was exhausted before the first bell rang.

    Tod Perry

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    Every year, back-to-school season brings new school supplies, a trip to Target for clothes, and social media channels flooded with photos of kids holding chalkboards. Over the past decade, back-to-school photos with kids standing on their doorsteps with signs with their name, grade, year, and teacher have been ubiquitous on social media.

    There’s nothing wrong with the photos, they’re a cute way for parents and kids to mark the passage of time. For most parents, it’s a way to remember that it all goes by way too fast. However, for the “perfect” parents out there who like to flaunt their Instagrammable lifestyle, they’re another way to show off their “flawless” first days on social media.

    One mom said what we were all thinking

    In an attempt to show parents they don’t have to fall for the myth of perfection on social media, Jeni Bukolt, a mother of two boys from Waxhaw, North Carolina, posted a first-day photo of herself looking burnt out and wearing sunglasses. School hadn’t even begun yet.

    “Mom’s first day of school,” the handmade sign read. “I am 42 years tired. I’ll probably miss a school ‘theme’ day. I really like sleep. Please don’t ask me to volunteer. But I will buy you supplies.”

    “I make signs for my kids each year but lately I’ve thought about how I always feel behind, as though I’m failing (in some way),” Bukolt told Today. Clearly, other parents feel the same because it was a hit with a lot of them on Instagram.

    A lot of comments were from parents who thought the photo was a breath of fresh air during a stressful time of year. “Brilliant, you speak for millions!” cathycole wrote. “May we all survive the drop off/pick up lane,” merakifitnessandpole added.

    “I thought maybe if I can create a lighthearted moment, some other moms will laugh and understand we’re all in this kind of struggle together. Like, let’s have empathy for each other,” Bukolt told Good Morning America.

    Bukolt hopes her post builds an “empathy bridge” between parents. She’d also like to shine a little reality on the parents who feel judged on social media.

    “I also feel like when you look at social media, there’s all these, [picture perfect] worlds,” she added. “It’s not the true story. And some people think like, ‘Oh, they have it better or they’re perfect,’ and this is an opportunity to say no, we’re all real human beings … we’re all in the struggle together.”

    Not everyone thought it was funny

    But of course, there were some humorless parents who thought her post wasn’t supportive of teachers or her two sons. So Bukolt made a follow-up where she explained that she was just having fun.

    “For the keyboard warriors… yes I do have a job, yes I love my kids and no, I don’t hate teachers. Back to work. Have a great day!” she wrote.

    She kept it going the next year too

    The next year, Bukolt returned with another sign where she said she’s “43 years tired,” has a “new sleep routine,” and please don’t ask her to do any math. “Liam asked me about division last night. I know that common core math should be easier, but apparently I am NOT smarter than a 4th grader,” she joked in the comments.

    Parenting is hard and we all fall short of glory at times. Kudos to Bukolt for making us feel a little less alone and letting us know that some folks have already accepted their imperfections on the first day.

    “If other moms can get a good laugh about it, then that makes my heart happy,” she said.

    This article originally appeared four years ago. It has been updated.

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  • Baby twins separated for the first time steal an adorable secret nighttime reunion
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    Baby twins separated for the first time steal an adorable secret nighttime reunion

    There’s nothing like the bond between twins.

    Annie Reneau

    Upworthy Staff

    If you’ve ever spent a significant amount of time with twins, you know that no other relationship compares. My husband has twin brothers, and one of those brothers had twin daughters (busting the twins-skip-a-generation myth), so our family is quite familiar with the twin bond.

    Over and over, we’ve watched with amusement as one adult twin will move across the country for one reason or another, with the other twin eventually, but inevitably, following them. Twins redefine the word “inseparable,” which makes sense since they’ve literally been together since before they were even born.

    This baby monitor video says it all

    Nowhere is that bond more apparent than in a video of twin babies at the end of their first day of separation ever.

    In a TikTok video shared by @thattwinmama back in 2023, we see black-and-white footage from a baby monitor showing baby twin sisters standing in adjacent cribs.

    @thattwinmama_

    Will forever make me😭… cant think of anything stronger than the #twinbond ❤️ #twinsoftiktok #twins #twinsisters #babylife #twinlove #sisterlove #feelgood #babiesoftiktok #sharethelove #newmom #4u #sistersforever

    ♬ What Was I Made For? [From The Motion Picture “Barbie”] – Billie Eilish

    “Our twins were separated for a day for the first time in their entire lives…” the video text reads. “That night we put them down leaving them alone for the first time in over 24 hours. And pretty sure it’s safe to say they definitely missed each other.”

    Watch how the baby girls cuddle and love on one another with the sweetest tenderness.

    The head kiss? The back pat? Come on. It doesn’t get any cuter than that.

    They still have that special bond today

    And in case you were wondering, that fierce love is still going strong, as seen in these later videos from the account:

    @thattwinmama_

    She said bully who 👀🤣 #twinmom #twins #toddlermom #momlife #twinmomlife #funnymom #funny #toddler #twinsisters #4u #anxiety #twinbond #4upage

    ♬ Anxiety – Doechii

    @thattwinmama_

    If looks could kill 😅 Honestly they both would ride or die for one another if I’m honest. #twins #twinmom #twinsisters #twinbond #twinsoftiktok #momlife #funnyvideos #funnytoddlers #fypシ #doechii

    ♬ Anxiety – Doechii

    Science backs up what we already knew

    There truly is nothing like the bond between twins. There have even been documented cases of twins who were separated at birth and who ended up having the same traits and making similar life choices later in life. It’s a relationship only twins themselves get to experience, but anyone who is a friend or family member of twins has to try to understand it if they truly want to know them because it’s such a unique and inseparable part of their identity.

    This article originally appeared three years ago. It has been updated.

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  • The forgotten reason teachers don’t use the letter ‘E’ in grading anymore
    Photo credit: Canva – A female student shocked by her poor grade on a test.
    ,

    The forgotten reason teachers don’t use the letter ‘E’ in grading anymore

    It will never return to report cards.

    Heather Wake

    We all know how the grading system works. A is the best score you can get (and the only acceptable score for the perfectionists among us). Then comes B, which is also generally considered positive. By C, you’re in dangerous territory. D is even worse. And F, well, F is the equivalent of wearing a dunce cap.

    But where’s the E grade? Why do we skip over this letter?

    Turns out, we didn’t always exclude the letter E from our grading system. And it led to some very confused parents.

    The missing grade that vanished from report cards

    The earliest record of a letter-grade system comes from Mount Holyoke College in 1897, which quickly spread to virtually every school in North America. When it first debuted, E was the lowest grade a student could receive, with A still being the highest.

    Though popular, the system was fairly wonky from the start. As reported by Slate, A represented scores between 95 and 100, while B and C each stood for 10-point ranges. Students could get a D only with a score of “precisely 75.” Anything below that received an E. And then, only a year later, they added F to represent “fail,” and tweaked each letter grade to represent only five points, with scores below 75 resulting in failure. E reflected scores 75 to 79.

    Why schools dropped the letter E

    However, as the story goes, many parents who viewed E on their child’s report cards interpreted it as “Excellent,” rather than practically failing.

    By 1930, most schools became aware of the unintended consequences and did away with the letter grade entirely.

    Of course, this hasn’t been the only time schools have experimented with different grading metrics. Some played around with varieties of numerical scales (0-4, 0-9, 0-20, 0-100). Others tried just three grade groups (best, worse, and worst), while some used four under the following labels: “first in their respective classes,” “orderly, correct, and attentive,” “have made very little improvement,” and “they have learnt little or nothing.”

    In fact, the further back you go, you’ll notice that tracking an individual student’s progress and mastery through close, personal observation and detailed, descriptive feedback was the norm rather than categorization. But as schools kept getting an influx of students, a standardized and seemingly more efficient system became the norm.

    Of course, there have been criticisms of this method since its inception. For decades, educators have shared concerns that it prioritized getting a certain letter grade rather than the intrinsic value of learning.

    Could grading systems change again?

    learning, teachers, grading
    Image of a hand writing “Never Stop Learning” in marker. Canva

    That debate is still happening today. In recent years, some schools and universities have experimented with alternatives like pass/fail systems, standards-based grading, narrative evaluations, and competency-based assessments that measure whether students have mastered specific skills rather than averaging test scores. Others have adopted portfolios and teacher feedback in place of traditional report cards altogether.

    Supporters of these approaches argue that they can reduce anxiety and encourage students to focus more on growth, participation, and curiosity. Critics worry they may make it harder to measure achievement consistently or compare students across schools.

    Either way, the disappearing E grade is proof that the grading system has never been quite as fixed or timeless as many people assume. What feels permanent in one generation of classrooms can easily be rewritten by the next. And, arguably, it should be able to adapt as we do. 

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  • Boomer dad plays song to comfort his daughter going through divorce and it’s everything
    Some dads just get it.
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    Boomer dad plays song to comfort his daughter going through divorce and it’s everything

    Sometimes you don’t need words.

    Heather Wake

    Upworthy Staff

    There’s no shortage of stories out there showing how emotionally distant or out of touch some baby boomers can be. Younger generations are so fed up with it that they have their own catchphrase of frustration, for crying out loud. The disconnect becomes especially visible in parenting styles. Boomers, who grew up with starkly different views on empathy, trauma, and seeking help, have a reputation for being less than ideal support systems for their children when it comes to emotional issues.

    But even if they often have a different way of showing it, boomer parents of course have a lot of love for their children, and many try their best to be a source of comfort when their kid suffers as any good parent would. Occupational therapist Jacqueline (@jac.rose8) shared a lovely example of this by posting a video of her boomer dad helping her through a divorce in the best way he knew how.

    His solution was unexpected and perfect

    Turns out, it was the perfect thing.

    “My husband just said he’s divorcing me and my dad came over and I was non-functional in bed,” Jacqueline wrote her video, adding that “…boomer dad didn’t know what to do, so he played his favorite song, the Dua Lipa ‘Rocket Man’ remix.”

    In the clip, Jacqueline’s dad is faced toward the window describing what he imagines while listening to the song and performing the sweetest dad dance ever. They go back and forth a little bit, but it’s clear that her dad just wants to sit with her in the moment, be a little silly, and provide her with some comfort.

    @jac.rose8

    #divorcetok #divorcesucks #divorcesupport #divorcesupportforwomen #divorcesupportsquad #supportivedad #disabilitytiktok

    ♬ original sound – Jacqueline

    The heartwarming moment served as a great reminder that a lot of words aren’t always necessary.

    The internet fell completely in love

    “I am CRYING. This is so precious, he is trying his hardest to be there for you in any capacity. How pure ❤️,” one person wrote.

    Another added, “This would instantly make me feel better.”

    Even Jacqueline shared in the comments that her dad “didn’t know what to say but he was there and helped me in such a sweet way. He’s the best.”

    Proving that he has multiple love languages, Jacqueline later shared that her dad also went out to Home Depot to replace her lightbulbs. Not only that, but her mom also made Jacqueline’s favorite dinner.

    @jac.rose8

    Replying to @NatCat1738 divorcetok divorcesucks divorcesupport divorcesupportforwomen divorcesupportsquad supportivedad supportivemom disabilitytiktok

    ♬ original sound – Jacqueline

    Great parents exist in every generation

    It can be easy to sometimes focus a little too much on the generational differences between boomers and everyone else, but really, it goes to show that great parents (and great people) exist in every generation. Part of what makes them great is knowing that they don’t need to be perfect in order to show up when things are hard. Being there and sharing their love is enough.

    This article originally appeared three years ago. It has been updated.

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  • Florida teacher says she’s quitting her job because of school’s ‘course recovery’ shortcut
    Photo credit: @toriefowler/TikTok, used with permission – Florida Teacher Torie Fowler explaining why course recovery is used to play the system.
    ,

    Florida teacher says she’s quitting her job because of school’s ‘course recovery’ shortcut

    She explained how many students use course recovery to play the system.

    Heather Wake

    There are plenty of reasons teachers across the country have listed for why they are leaving their jobs. But whether it’s burnout or battling against artificial intelligence, there’s one common denominator: the classroom is, by and large, no longer the haven of learning it once was.

    One teacher recently gave a prime example of this when she explained “course recovery,” and why that alone has led to her quitting.

    What is course recovery?

    In a now-viral Tiktok clip, Torie Fowler, an English teacher in Florida, shared that course recovery was originally intended to help struggling students stay on track for passing a class. Essentially it works by offering a semi-condensed make-up curriculum, primarily via online modules, rather than forcing students to repeat the full semester.

    However, as Fowler explained, things have gone too far.

    @toriefowler

    Do you know what course recovery is? I’m positive it’s a public school thing, but what exactly is the child learning from this concept? #teacherlife #teachersoftiktok #teaching #teacher #publicschool

    ♬ original sound – Torie Fowler

    For instance, one of her seniors who earned an 18 percent in her class (which is already bonkers considering the student didn’t ever show up to class, apparently) was assigned course recovery. Somehow, this student was able to complete the entire nine weeks of recovery assignments in a single day, magically passing the class with a 75.

    “What are we doing?” Fowler said at the end of her clip.

    Granted, course recovery does have its uses. In an interview with Today, Fowler noted that students burdened with illness, family instability, or learning challenges can greatly benefit from it. Still, the students who know how to play the system use it as an easy workaround, forfeiting the opportunity to actually learn. And so far, the system encourages that kind of behavior.

    “We are teaching them that there are no consequences for their actions,” she said. “It’s becoming more about getting them through and walking across the stage than actual learning.”

    @toriefowler

    You can read the full article at the link in my bio, but in terms of public education, do you agree? #teachersoftiktok #teacher #teacherlife

    ♬ Self Aware – Temper City

    Teachers across the country share the same concern

    Fowler is far from the only educator experiencing this frustration. Down in the comments, many fellow teachers sounded off.

    “We have the same here in RI. It’s so unfair to the teachers, admins and other students.”

    “I’ll do you one better: in my district a student who fails a class can do course recovery and change the whole grade for that class. That F becomes an A on the transcript as fast as the student can find answers to everything online, and they can do that in a day.”

    “Credit recovery is a joke. I had a student fail on purpose bc CR was easier. If they can complete an entire semester of Algebra in 3 days (I’ve seen it), they aren’t learning the content. Why are we allowing this?!?”

    Fowler’s video is just one of many worrying examples of how modern schools are prioritizing graduation rates over meaningful education. Many teachers say they entered the profession to help students grow, think critically, and build real skills for the future. When that mission starts feeling impossible, it’s no surprise that so many educators are deciding they can no longer stay.

    @toriefowler

    In all my feels as I realize my time in this room is coming to an end this month. Some of it was more than I could dream of, while the reality of a system we can’t change is more than I want to carry. #publicschool #teacher #teachersoftiktok #teachersbelike #teacherlife

    ♬ original sound – Breezee Talk – Breezee Talk

    However, as Fowler put it, it’s important to talk about what’s not working, because with enough conversation, “change can begin.”

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