When people think of sexual education, they often think about the awkward talk depicted in movies: a parent nervously sits down with their teenager to explain the mechanics of sexual intercourse. There’s also the uncomfortable acknowledgement of urges, and how surprise pregnancies are prevented. A certified sexologist who goes by the name Ticha Kanticha online recently caused a stir on whether this common practice, and its timing, is best.
In a video, Kanticha is challenged by her friend Dr. Kevin Liu to a debate around sex education. He starts by asking how young sex education should start. The sexologist quickly responds between ages 2-3 years old, which seemingly not only blows Liu’s mind, but some viewers’ minds as well.
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Liu replies, “Okay…I’m going to say around the teenage years, and a common argument is that because that’s when puberty hits, and that’s when they’re going to get the most exposure to intimacy and sexual experiences. And that’s when they need to know, and it’s generally just too much info at this stage of life.”
This take is a common one, but for Kanticha, that’s entirely too late. After she asks if people only start getting sexually harassed at the age of 12, Liu quickly retorts that sex education won’t help in those situations. But sexual education is not just about the mechanics of the act of sex. It encompasses everything that has to do with someone’s genitalia and sexual organs, which Kanticha breaks down for her friend.
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What is sex education anyway?
“I’ll give you an example. Sex education, people assume you have to teach people what sex is,” she says before later adding, “Sex education is everything related to…it’s a big umbrella. It’s everything related to sex. So, for example, your body parts that could be sexual, which is to say your intimate area here (she gestures below her waist).”
Kanticha goes on to explain that teaching a 2 or 3-year-old the proper names for their genitals or private areas is considered sex education. This would also be the time when parents tell their toddlers that no one is allowed to touch their private areas. She says this teaches children at a very young age that this type of touching is inappropriate and should not happen, nor should anyone tell them to touch others there.
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Kanticha explains that this is something children should be aware of and learn to tell a trusted adult if someone ever touches them in that way. The University of Michigan states that children should learn about good touch versus bad touch during preschool ages, specifically between ages 2 and 4.
Having age appropriate conversations
According to the C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital National Poll on Children’s Health at Michigan Medicine, “Despite expert recommendations to talk about ‘body safety’ during preschool years, less than half of parents of preschoolers say they’ve begun that discussion. Meanwhile, one in four parents of elementary school-age children say they haven’t talked about inappropriate touching. The most common reasons include not getting around to it, the child is too young, not wanting to scare the child, and not knowing how to bring it up.”
The CDC reports that “At least one in four girls and one in 20 boys in the United States experience child sexual abuse.” They also point out that these figures are likely underestimated due to children waiting to report or never reporting sexual abuse.
Viewers react
Early sexual education is about safety, not sharing inappropriate content, but there were mixed reactions in the comments of the video. One person shares, “Netherlands starts at 2 or 3 and they have the lowest teen pregnancy rate in the world.”
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Another disagrees, writing, “I’d say sex education begins as soon as the individual exudes sexual behavior or is exposed to it or has related communication on it etc.”
Someone else says, “Maybe rebrand it for every phase of life? Maybe for freaking toddlers you can rebrand it into “Safe Happy Home” education or whatever. Then once in a teen years called it Sex Education or whatnot.”
“Sex is not a bad word, it isn’t even a bad thing. You don’t call math “happy numbers time”. Sex exists and it’s a part of life. Teaching kids about it, adapted to their age (obviously!), won’t turn them into some depraved sexual deviants. This whole puritanical stance is dangerous, and it tells more about your dirty minds than it helps kids,” this viewer responds.
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“100% it starts from the very beginning and every kid girl & boy needs to be taught this so they can be aware! Protect Your Children! Protect All Children! Stop being scared to communicate with your kids. Just like she said you don’t have to explain everything in detail those steps go in stages as they grow up but the conversation needs to start immediately about their body parts and that they need to be protected so they don’t get manipulated and hurt,” someone else points out.
