upworthy
Family

Man responds to family looking to reconnect after throwing him out of the house 37 years ago

At 16, they accused him of something he didn't do and left him on the streets.

families, abandonment, homelessness
via Andrea Piacquadio/Pexels and Inzmam Khan/Pexels

A man contemplates how to respond to an email.


On March 16, 2024, Upworthy shared the story of a Redditor named Fancy-Anywhere-4733 (FA for short) who had an incredible dilemma: How do you respond to your family 37 years after they threw you out of the house as a 16-year-old for a bogus reason?

Now, he has shared his response, which is full of honesty, strength and grace.

First, here is some background (you can read the whole story here).

FA’s mother died when he was 12 years old and 2 years later, his father married a woman named Ashley with two kids, Mark (14) and Emily (12). “I got along with Ashley and Emily really well, but Mark, not so much so,” FA recalls. The following year, this rivalry came to a head when both boys fell for the same girl, Lisa, that FA began to date, much to Mark’s annoyance.

To get FA back for dating his crush, Mark planted some of Emily’s panties in his dresser drawer for his stepmother to find on laundry day.

broken family, upset teen, homeless teen

A distressed teen afraid of his future.

via Christian Erfurt/Unsplash

“I had no answer as I'd never seen [the underwear] before,” FA wrote. “Of course, no one believed me. No matter how much protesting I did." Mark added to the lies by saying that FA often stared at Emily and once said he wanted to marry her.

FA’s father threw him out of the house for being a "perv" and he was forced to live on the streets, doing whatever he could to get by. After decades of hard work he created a new life. He had a good job, was married with 4 kids and had finally found real happiness.

Recently, at the age of 53, his stepsister, Emily, whom he hadn’t spoken to in years, emailed him. Emily revealed that Mark got drunk and admitted that he set FA up and the news has been like a “bombshell” was dropped on the family.

“After sharing this revelation with Mom and Dad. Dad started crying, like really crying,” Emily wrote in the email. “I've never seen him cry before. I believe it because he has been carrying around a lot of guilt all these years. Obviously, now knowing the truth, he is now having to deal with the consqueses of his actions. However, after several hours of talking, we all came to the conclusion that we needed to find you and make amends. I have spent hours trying to locate you, in the hopes that I could reach out and extend a heartfelt apology for the years of misunderstanding and mistreatment and hurt.”

woman on computer, family fights, forgiveness

A woman writing an email late at night.

via Muzuno K/Pexels

Receiving the email was an incredible shock, and FA wasn’t sure whether he would respond at all. “I'm, however indifferent to the idea,” FA admitted. “Like, I have no ill feelings towards [Emily]. She obviously was young and had no real say in the matter. But with lots and lots of therapy, I learned to let go of that hate and anger and to let go of them. As well with all the love I receive from my wife, kids and in-laws, it's all I really need.”

FA received countless comments from people who suggested some ways to respond to the to the email. Two days later, he shared his response to Emily in a new post:

Dear Emily,

I appreciate you taking the time to reach out to me, but I must be honest with you. The years of pain and hurt caused by the lies and manipulation by Mark and the betrayal by Dad have left deep scars that will never be truly healed. While I understand that you are now aware of the truth and are genuinely sorry for what has transpired, I find it difficult to simply forgive and forget.

The betrayal and abandonment I experienced at the hands of my own family have left me with a sense of distrust and resentment that can never be overcome. The damage that has been done has impacted me in ways that you may never ever fully and truly understand, and the idea of trying to reconcile now feels like an insurmountable task.

I have spent years in therapy trying to come to terms with the pain and deep trauma I endured, and I have worked hard to build a wonderful life for myself that does not rely on the presence or approval of those who turned their backs on me.

While I am grateful for the apology and the newfound awareness of the truth, I do not feel compelled to rekindle a relationship that was built on lies, deception and betrayal. Especially after all these years.

I have found peace and closure in distancing myself from those who caused me harm, and I do not see the need to reopen old wounds in the name of reconciliation. While I believe in the power of forgiveness, that isn't something I can give.

I wish you all the best in your life, I really do, but I must prioritize my emotional health and self-preservation above all else. I hope you can respect my decision and understand that the wounds of the past will take a lifetime to heal. I would appreciate if you pass this fact on to the others and please don't reach out again. I must look to my future and not my past.

Sincerely, [FA]

email, man writing, family drama

A man writes an email on his laptop

via Christian Hume/Unsplash

"This is a good response. You are letting them know that the door is closed, and you didn't give them any information on whether you have a family," Primierofilho wrote in the comments. "That’s (one of) my favorite parts of [FA's] beautifully eloquent reply. By denying his ex-family any information of how he is doing, they don’t get to know which way to turn their feelings," Darkstormchaser added.

One of the most powerful parts of FA’s letter is the clear reason why he will never be able to forgive them. Even though he believes in forgiveness, doing so would unravel a lot of the work he’s done to heal after the incredible, nearly insurmountable pain they have caused him.

Forgiveness was simply a bridge too far and FA should be proud that he drew up clear boundaries with his family. There was no reason why he should trade an ounce of his peace of mind in exchange for giving solace to those who abandoned him as a teen.

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Ocean Wise
Be Ocean Wise
Sustainability

Amazing ocean facts you never learned in school

Not even Captain Ahab knew this much about marine life.

Photo by Milos Prelevic on Unsplash
brown fish beside coral under body of water

The ocean covers more than 70 percent of our planet—yet there’s so much about it that we don’t yet know. Experts, in fact, believe we’ve only explored about five percent of the ocean so far—meaning that most of it remains completely unseen and undiscovered.

What we do know, however, is that the ocean is truly wise. Not only does it sustain all human and animal life on the planet, the creatures under the sea continue to give scientists insight that can transform human lives as well (just read about the amazing axolotl below to see what we mean).

A happy ocean makes for happy, healthy human beings (not to mention a healthy planet)—so this summer we’re helping our friends at Ocean Wise spread the word that no action is too small—holding a cleanup on a local shoreline, for instance. Learning about our ocean and all its wonders is another step anyone can take for conservation, so buckle in and prepare for a tidal wave of info that will blow your mind.

1. Playing music—specifically, recordings of healthy reef soundscapes—can help grow coral reef populations.

live coralsPhoto by QUI NGUYEN on Unsplash

Healthy coral reef populations are filled with diverse sounds, thanks to the fish, snapping shrimp, and other marine life that live there. Scientists have found that playing recorded sounds of healthy reefs actually attract coral larvae, since the sounds indicate a healthy, vibrant habitat. Using this knowledge, scientists have taken recorded reef sounds, played them near degraded reefs, and in doing so, have increased the settlement rates of coral larvae, helping the coral reefs regenerate.

2. Dolphins like to party with pufferfish.

Photo by Talia Cohen on Unsplash

How’s this for a good time? Dolphins, particularly younger ones, have been known to seek out pufferfish to play games with them, chewing on them and passing them back and forth between each other like a hacky sack. Not only is this entertainment for the dolphins, scientists theorize that they may intentionally be trying to get the pufferfish to give off a neurotoxin called tetrodotoxin (TTX)–which is a chemical they release when threatened. This chemical is highly toxic in large doses–but in small quantities, experts think that it might induce a mild, pleasurable effect in the dolphins, similar to a narcotic. Party on.

3. Male humpback whales are total crooners.

A male humpback whale breaches the water.

Photo by Thomas Kelley on Unsplash

All humpback whales can vocalize, but male humpback whales actually sing.

During mating season, scientists have observed male humpback whales making sounds that are distinctly different from other humpback calls. Unlike other sounds, these songs have a clear structure, and use small, repetitive “phrases” organized in a specific sequence—in the same way humans sing different verses during a song. Even more amazing? Male humpbacks all sing the same song together in “choruses,” in sessions that last from five minutes to several hours.

4. Axolotls have superpowers (and scientists think it could benefit humans one day).

a couple of animals that are in some waterPhoto by T K on Unsplash

Among biologists, axolotls are known for their ability to regrow lost or damaged tissue. When an adult axolotl loses a limb, they can actually grow it back in just a few months time, thanks to a substance they produce called retinoic acid, which plays a large role in regenerating skin cells. (If the name sounds familiar, it’s because retinoic acid is a derivative of Vitamin A, and it’s commonly found in skin creams.) While we already know that retinoic can make our skin look fabulous, scientists are currently studying whether it could someday help human limbs regrow, similar to the axolotl’s.

5. A healthy ocean can help reverse climate change

green algae underwater photographyPhoto by Brian Yurasits on Unsplash

The ocean generates half of the oxygen we breathe and absorbs nearly a third of the world’s carbon emissions. Phytoplankton, the microscopic algae that float near the ocean’s surface, are a big part of the reason why. But there’s another unsung hero—kelp. Unlike phytoplankton, kelp are large seaweeds that grow in dense underwater forests along coastlines, absorbing CO2 and supporting ecosystems. Ocean Wise is helping bring back these powerful carbon sinks one kelp forest at a time.

Help us #BeOceanWise by doing one small thing for ocean conservation in your community (because just one thing can start a huge wave of positive change). Visit ocean.orgfor tips and tricks to keep our oceans healthy because no action is too small.

Art

It took 14 years and 380 global embroiders to make one stunningly meaningful dress

A truly multicultural art project with style touches from 51 different countries.

Photos courtesy of The Red Dress project
Embroiderer Lekazia Turner wearing The Red Dress.

Few things bring people together more beautifully than art. Whether it's music, sculpture, paint or fabric, the arts are a way for us to express ourselves, our cultures and our common humanity. But rarely do we witness one singular piece of art truly encapsulating the creativity of our human family.

At first glance, the dress created for the Red Dress project is quite obviously stunning. It looks as though it could be worn by a royal—though a royal from where? The style, colors and patterns of the dress don't shout any particular country or culture; in fact, we can point to different elements of it and say it looks like it belongs on any continent.

There's a reason for that. The dress is made out of 84 pieces of burgundy silk dupion, which spent 14 years being sent around the world to be embroidered by 380 people from 51 countries—a truly global, multicultural creation.

Of those 380 embroiderers, about a third were commissioned artisans who were paid for their work and receive a portion of all ongoing exhibition fees. The rest were volunteers who contributed their stitches at events in various countries. Approximately 97% of the embroiderers were female.

British textile artist Kirstie Macleod conceived the project in 2009 as "an investigation into identity, with a desire to connect with women from the around without borders and boundaries." The basic design started as a sketch on the back of a napkin and has grown into a tangible garment that is not only a gorgeous work of art but a platform for women around the world and from all walks of life to express themselves and have their voices heard.

As shared on the project's website:

"Embroiderers include female refugees from Palestine and Syria, women seeking asylum in the UK from Iraq, China, Nigeria and Namibia, victims of war in Kosovo, Rwanda, and DR Congo; impoverished women in South Africa, Mexico, and Egypt; individuals in Kenya, Japan, Turkey, Sweden, Peru, Czech Republic, Dubai, Afghanistan, Australia, Argentina, Switzerland, Canada, Tobago, Vietnam, Estonia, USA, Russia, Pakistan, Wales, Colombia and England, students from Montenegro, Brazil, Malta, Singapore, Eritrea, Norway, Poland, Finland, Ireland, Romania and Hong Kong as well as upmarket embroidery studios in India and Saudi Arabia."

On Instagram, Kirstie Macleod shared a panel of the dress that was embroidered by two women in Kosovo, who shared some of their reflections on their experiences in the war there.

They stitched words into the birds they embroidered:

"Better one winter in your own country than a hundred springs away."

"The greatest wealth is to live content with little."

"Freedom has come. Love yourself first."

"Love all. Trust some. Hate none."

"A winter is a winter. Be nice, everyone."

"We live in peace now."

The creation of the dress began in 2009 and was completed in 2023. Each woman embroidered a piece of her own story into the dress, which contains millions of stitches. From established professional artisans to first-time embroiderers, the women were encouraged to share something that expressed their personal identities as well as their cultures. Some used traditional embroidery styles that had been practiced for hundreds of years where they are from. Others stitched in meaningful elements of their life stories. Some of the women are also using textile work to rebuild their lives and earn a consistent living.

The dress is on tour, being displayed in museums and galleries around the world. The photos showing women of various ages and ethnicities wearing the dress are made all the more moving knowing the history of how and by whom it was made.

In May 2025, a book detailing the dress's creation and journey around the world was published and can be found here.

Absolutely stunning. What a wonderful idea to connect women in a way that lets them share their stories and showcases and beautifully honors them.

This article first appeared three years ago and has been updated.

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Women's Health

A gynecologist asked women how visits could be improved. Thousands responded, in detail.

"How would you design/optimize a visit to the gynecologist’s office? No detail is too small.”

Photo credit: Canva

Many would agree that gynecology visits could be improved upon.

When picturing a doctor’s office, you might imagine a less than warm atmosphere. Those oh-so-lovely fluorescent lights instantly come to my mind. Imagine if a doctor told you, “I want to design our visit in a way that makes you feel most comfortable.” Suddenly that annual check-up doesn’t sound so dreadful after all.

Dr. Ryan Stewart, a urogynecologist at the Midwest Center for Pelvic Health, recently asked women to weigh in on the redesign of his office. Posting the question to X, he wrote: “I have the opportunity to design my office from scratch. I’m asking women. How would you design/optimize a visit to the gynecologist’s office? No detail is too small.”

gynecology, gynecologist, women's health, medicine, OBGYNThe gynecologist's office is a vulnerable place.Photo credit: Canva

His tweet ended with “If I’ve ever had a tweet worthy of virality, it’s this one.”

And boy was he right. His tweet nearly instantly received thousands of replies. Turns out, there are a lot of ways to improve a visit to the gyno.

Including:

Empathy toward sexual trauma

This includes starting the exam off asking if a patient has any trauma, and not dismissing feelings of discomfort, according to commenters.

Improved intimacy

As part of improved privacy, many advocated to not be asked if an intern can observe while the intern is still in the room.

"It's hard to say no to them," one person wrote.

Another added "I'm sitting on the table in the gown and [the gyno] brings in this young guy and says 'you don't mind him observing this do you?' I consented but have been pissed off ever since and never went back to her."

One person mentioned that their current doctor recently swapped the thin, exposing paper gown for spa style robes, adding both privacy and a dash of luxury.

Diverse posters

This suggestion comes aptly timed, as the diagram (above) of a black fetus recently inspired a viral conversation. Many were noting that they had never seen one in medical imagery before.

One person remarked, "I am 53 years old and have never seen myself represented in anything in a doctor's office, even pamphlets. Change that!"

Mental health screenings

Waiting until the clothes are ON to disclose important info

"Don’t discuss care or diagnoses when people are naked," pleaded a commenter in a now-deleted tweet. "I remember how much more respected and comfortable I felt when a new gynaecologist introduced himself to me while I was clothed, did the exam, then had me get dressed and meet him in his office to discuss care! Much better!"

Bottom line: It's already a vulnerable time. Let people have a moment to get comfortable.

One person added "I have always had to specifically ask to be able to talk to my doctor clothed first. Even when I hadn't met that doctor yet. I feel like that should be default, not up to me to ask for. It's such a power imbalance already, don't add unnecessary vulnerability."

Ditching the pink

To some, it's mildly annoying. To others, it's even triggering.

One person tweeted, "I went through a breast cancer scare, & EVERY women's medical office I went to–pink EVERYWHERE. I was at a really terrified moment in my life, & pink, pink, pink. I 100% can't stand it anymore."

Offering pain meds

Potentially painful procedures like IUD insertions or cervical biopsies typically only offer medication upon request. This Twitter user suggested offering them, making it clear that the patient has the option.

More accessibility in the exam and waiting rooms

Tables that lower for those with mobility issues as well as higher waiting room chairs were among the most frequently suggested items.

And lastly … a variety of speculum sizes

gynecology, gynecologist, speculum, OBGYN, women's health, pap smearSpeculums may be metal or plastic, but they're always cold.Photo credit: Canva

""A wide variety of speculum sizes, and introduction to the exam room including a play by play of how the visit will go," wrote one person in a now-deleted tweet. "Most people never get this and the office staff never ask if it’s their first exam and most people wouldn’t disclose fear or stress if they have it."

The general consensus: and while you're at it, warm them up too.

Dr. Stewart’s tweet did receive constructive criticism asking for more inclusion

Dr. Stewart welcomed the insight, sending a follow-up tweet that read:“Folks have [correctly] pointed out that I [incorrectly] said “women” when what I should have said was “folks who may need gynecologic care.” I named the practice with this in mind @midwestpelvis, but I find that I still have a lot of internalized/implicit bias.”

This viral thread might have started a trend. Soon after another medical practitioner tweeted:

“Love urogynecologist Dr. Stewart asking for input on ideal office design and wanted to ask the oncology community something similar: given that no one wants to come to a cancer doctor…what makes the experience MOST comfortable?”

Though Dr. Stewart describes his philosophy online as “I want you to leave every appointment feeling as though you’ve learned more about yourself,” it’s lovely to see that he is equally invested in learning about his patients as well.

This article originally appeared three years ago.

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Humor

Comedian perfectly sums up everything you need to know about Gen X in three definitive words

"If y'all don't like this joke, guess what – you're only giving me more cred."

Photo supplied by Jason Salmon

Jason Salmon talks about generations through comedy.

Jason Salmon has his finger on the pulse of just what makes Generation X tick. But in typical X fashion, his own promotional YouTube page boasts that he's been "described as like getting the best advice you’ve ever gotten from the dumbest guy you know."

His humility only makes him that much more charming. But the truth is, what we think doesn't really matter to his X Generation. In his comedy special, Biscuits and Gravy, at one point he asks the audience if there are any Gen X-ers. A few people clap and cheer and he responds, "Yeah. I don't even care. That's how Gen X I am. That's a calling card to our generation."

@jsalmoncomedy

Gen X would like you to leave us alone #genxtiktok #dontcare #genx #genxtiktokers #lucky #Standupcomedy #Jokes #fyp #CleanComedy #jasonsalmon

He points out the unlikelihood of a Gen X-er even being offended by that. "That's not even dismissive to a Gen X-er. It's like 'I don't care.' 'I don't care, also. Nice to meet you.'"

He then points to a person in the crowd and asks, "What generation are you?" But before they have a chance to answer, he jokes, "It doesn't matter. I don't care. That's the beautiful thing." He adds that if an audience member doesn't like the joke, guess what? Doesn't care. "If y'all don't like this joke, guess what, you're only giving me more cred as a Gen X-er. You're only making me more powerful."

The truth is that some of the stereotypes about Gen X aren't exactly true. Sure, we had director Richard Linklater calling us slackers. And Ben Stiller's film Reality Bites didn't exactly help dissuade the argument that we were ultra prepared for adulthood.

Gen X, Reality Bites, Winona Ryder, Ethan Hawke, gifConvenience store dance scene from the film Reality BitesGiphy, Universal Pictures, Jersey Films

But in an article called "8 Things That Gen X Gave the World" (via The Arrow, via – gasp – the AARP website) Esquire editor and radio and television personality Dave Holmes dispels some of those myths. "Generation X is exactly like corn. We’re largely ignored in the broader culture, disregarded in polling, a demilitarized zone between the boomers and the millennials. But we’ve actually contributed a great deal to the society that has spurned us."

He goes on to list some of those contributions, which in part include: blogs, alternative comedy, "comic books as our new global religion," and a little something called the Internet. Of the latter, he writes that in 1994, after he'd graduated from college and moved to New York, he had a friend who was "writing code for the Sony Music website."

He shares, "At the time, I had no idea what the word 'website' meant. My understanding of the Internet came entirely from Prodigy, a rudimentary content delivery network. But then one Saturday afternoon, Mike and I went up to his office, he turned his monitor on, and after that 20-minute connection process, he opened Netscape and typed in 'http://www.yahoo.com.' 'There,' he said, 'search for anything.' 'Anything?' I asked. 'Anything at all. Someone will have made a website for it.'"

Gen X, early internet, The Internet, Netscape, the WebA GIF of what the early Internet looked like.Giphy

So while apathy might not be the best description for Gen X, Jason Salmon proves one thing we can all agree on: they (we) have a sense of humor.

Many of the comments agree. One commenter under his YouTube clips proves that maybe we DO care a little. "Why is Gen X trending so much lately? Are we finally getting the recognition that we don't care about?"

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Culture

Elder Millennials discuss the major cultural differences they have with 'core' Millennials

"Teddy Ruxpin."

Images via Wikipedia

Elder Millennials reveal the different childhood experiences they had compared to young Millennials.

Millennials, those born between 1981 and 1996, are a generation with wide-ranging childhood experiences. Millennials born in the early 1980s, also known as 'Elder Millennials," had vastly different upbringings than those born in the 1990s.

In a Reddit forum for Millennials, member @_NoleFan6 posed the question: "Elder millennials (81-84), what are some things that separate you from the core/late millennials?"

They continued, "I’m just curious what makes my fellow elder millennials identify more with Gen X? Some things for me are: Being old enough to remember the tail end of the 80s, seeing Terminator 1 before Terminator 2, M.A.S.K. (iykyk), woodgrain VCRs, roller racer, going to see 1989 Batman at the theater, seeing Bo Jackson play, and not accessing the internet until ‘97 (I was 14). How about y’all?"

Many Elder Millennials could relate. They offered up 16 of their childhood experiences and how they differ from younger Millennials.

teddy ruxpin, teddy ruxpin toy, teddy bear, teddy bear 80s, 80s bearTeddy Bear 80S GIFGiphy

"Teddy Ruxpin. I'm a 1982 baby, and the Teddy Ruxpin craze was big when I was around 3 years old in the mid-'80s. I had talking Teddy, his talking friend Grubby, his books, his cassette tapes, his toy air ship and figurines, pajamas, underwear... People who are a few years younger than me don't really know what I am talking about when I mention him." —@KevinTodd82

"Being a latch key kid. And when young millennials don’t understand the turn it up to 11 phrase." —@geopimp1

"I’m an elder and my sister who’s 10 years younger is a core so I see Millennials as her generation not mine really as far as how we grew up. She was in grade 4 when 9-11 happened and I owned my own home. She is who taught me to take a selfie and I still have never used a filter. There’s just so much difference." —@Trick-Coyote-9834

my little pony, saturday morning cartoons, cartoons, 80s cartoons, morning cartoonsMy Little Pony 80S GIFGiphy

"We’re basically the in-between crew. We grew up like younger Gen X (80's Saturday cartoons and toys, landline phones, dial-up internet, tapes) but we hit our teenage and college years just as all the new techs exploded. So we remember life before smartphones and social media, but we adapted to it way faster than Gen X did. Basically, we were young enough to go through the whole switch from analog to digital, so we remember life before the internet but adapted to the online world pretty easily. We relate to Gen X and millennials in different ways, kind of the best of both. That’s why some of us like the term 'Xennials', which is those born between ’77 and ’83 or 84'." —@CedricBeaumont

"Tv before ratings. It was a free for all." —@merylbouw

"tamagotchi. pokemon. grunge." —@WOLFMAN_SPA

"Patchouli oil smell." —@rollbackprices

grunge, grunge music, nirvana, kurt cobain, alternative rockkurt cobain nirvana GIFGiphy

"Grunge. We were a little too young for the breakout albums in 1990-91, but we were the perfect age for the follow-ups in 1993-94 and the broader explosion of 'alternative rock' music in the mid 90s. Sadly, people who are even a little bit younger did not share in this experience, and that’s a bad thing because the music industry took a turn for the worse in the late 90s." —@Appropriate-Topic618

"Never had computer is or video games growing up. Literally grew up outside with no electronics." —@Humbly2022

"Being aware in the 90's." —@DiskSalt4643

90s, 1990s, the 90s, millennials, cluelessAlicia Silverstone Reaction GIFGiphy

"Being an adult when I got my first email address, and 9-11 happened. (A very young one, but still.) Having a truly analog childhood." —@Wild-Sky-4807

"Remembering Desert Storm and the USSR listed on maps in first grade textbooks. Princess Diana's death. MySpace top 8. Making your own websites on angelfire. AskJeeves. Dogpile." —@Ready-Player-Mom

"Michael Jordan. Michael Jackson. Mike Tyson. Michelangelo." —@Due-Set5398

michael jordan, jordan, michael jordan gif, miachael jordan nba, bullsChicago Bulls Dunk GIF by NBAGiphy

"I’m (82) an elder married to a core (88). Music, pop culture and especially kids programming are the main difference. We remember the 90s very differently - I was already too old for the Disney 90s surge of Aladdin and Lion King while she was too young to follow Jordan and the Bulls. I outgrew TGIF by the time Boy Meets World went on the air but she was too young to understand why boys loved Step by Step." —@Quick-Angle9562

"I think the biggest difference is cell phones/social media. Late millennials had smart phones in hs. We didn’t have text messages, and had to wait til after 9 to talk for free." —@walkhardd

"Watching Jurassic Park in the movie theatre 🥹." —@organicbabykale1

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Science

45 years ago, Carl Sagan debunked astrology in 2 minutes using twins and a newspaper

“Astrology suggests a dangerous fatalism.”

via Physics and Philosophy/YouTube

Carl Sagan on astrology.

Astrology is the pseudoscientific study of the patterns in the stars and their alleged influence over individuals and history. It has existed as long as humans first gazed into the night sky, and it continues to fascinate people to this day. Currently, it's experiencing a renaissance with younger people after becoming a popular topic on social media.

“There’s some indication that cave art shows this idea that animals and things can be imbued with some kind of spirit form that then has an influence on you, and if you appease that spirit form, then you will have a successful hunt. That was taken over by the idea of divination, where you can actually look at things in nature and study them carefully, such as tea-leaf reading,” astronomer Sten Odenwald told Time.

astroloical chart, astrological sign, astrology, libra, stars, planets, diceAn astrological chart and divination dice.via Canva/Photos

Even though humanity’s understanding of the cosmos has made astrology appear rather crude and outdated, some people still swear by the power of Mercury in retrograde or the return of Saturn to determine the course of their lives. A recent YouGov poll found that 27% of Americans, including 37% of those under 30, believe that the position of the stars and planets influences their lives.

Although there’s something magical about having one's fate intertwined with the movement of celestial objects, it’s not a very logical way to go through life. In fact, Carl Sagan quickly disproved astrology in a 1980 episode of Cosmos: A Personal Journey. Sagan, the “Showman of Science,” is one of the world's greatest science communicators. At the time, Cosmos was seen by over 500 million people, making it the most-watched show in public television history.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Carl Sagan believed that astrology is dangerous.

“[Astrology] seems to lend a cosmic significance to the routine of our daily lives. It pretends to satisfy our longing to feel personally connected with the universe. Astrology suggests a dangerous fatalism. If our lives are controlled by a set of traffic signals in the sky. Why try to change anything?” Sagan asked.

How to disprove astrology

Sagan used two simple methods to disprove astrology. The first was by looking at competing astrological forecasts in two newspapers, the New York Post and the New York Daily News. The Post's forecast for Libra said that “compromise will help ease tension.” However, the forecast for Libra in the Daily News suggests the opposite: “Demand more of yourself.”

“It's interesting that these predictions are not predictions, they tell you what to do, they don't say what's going to happen,” Sagan said. “They're consciously designed to be so vague that it could apply to anybody, and they disagree with each other.”

Sagan shot more holes into astrology by noting that if he had a twin, born on the same day, nearly at the same time, with the exact same astrological sign, they could have very different destinies. In the case of twins, one may die at a very young age from a horseback accident, while another may live a long and prosperous life. Therefore, the astrological forecast would have to be incorrect for one of them. "If astrology were valid, how could we have such profoundly different fates?" Sagan asks.

carl saga, nasa, carl sagan moon, moon lander, moon mission, astronomyCarl Sagan with NASA technology.via NASA/Wikimedia Commons

Ultimately, Sagan believes that looking towards the planets to find out where our lives are headed is a shallow way of connecting with the universe when our real connection goes right to the core of our being. “The desire to be connected with the cosmos reflects a profound reality, for we are connected not in the trivial ways that the pseudoscience of astrology promises but in the deep ways,” Sagan said. But what is this deeper connection Sagan is alluding to? He has shown that humans are made of the most incredible substance in the cosmos: starstuff.

“The nitrogen in our DNA, the calcium in our teeth, the iron in our blood, the carbon in our apple pies were made in the interiors of collapsing stars. We are made of starstuff,” Sagan famously said.

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