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Video of a man ignoring cues that a woman is uncomfortable is a masterclass in what not to do

women, men, communication

A customer totally ignored this young woman's signals that she wasn't interested.

Ask a random woman if a man has ever made her question her safety just by talking to her, and chances are you're going to hear an immediate yes. Not all interactions with strangers lead to discomfort, of course, and sometimes it just comes down to basic gut instinct. There are also varying levels of discomfort when men talk to you as a woman, from "Oof, this is awkward" to "I feel creeped out right now" to "I wonder if this guy is a serial killer."

When a man starts talking to us in a way that makes us uncomfortable, we generally make it known in some way. Most of us won't come out and say, "Back off, dude," unless the behavior becomes super egregious, because 1) it may not be in our personality to be blunt, 2) we expect that the guy will take the hint eventually or 3) we sense that confronting the man would make us even more unsafe than we already feel.

More often than not, we make our discomfort clear in our body language and the way we respond to questions. Long story short, if we don't show we're interested, we're not interested.


A viral video from TikTok News shows an interaction between a 19-year-old woman selling stickers at a retail shop and a man who kept asking her questions about herself. It's a masterclass in what not to do as a guy and a perfect example of what signs to look for to determine that a woman isn't picking up what you're laying down.

Watch the interaction:

So first of all, after the first few questions about her age and where she goes to school, the guy should have gotten the clue that she was not interested in conversing with him further. Her answers were short and to the point. She didn't offer any additional details, nor did she reciprocate with questions about him. If a woman is interested after you strike up a conversation, she will not answer your questions this way.

She didn't add what she's studying or whether she likes school. She didn't ask, "How old are you? Do you go to school?" She shows no interest whatsoever in keeping the conversation going.

Second of all, her body language is a clear indicator. She's not smiling warmly. She's not leaning casually over the counter toward him. She doesn't go over to him when he asks for help. She stands still, fidgets sometimes and only moves when she needs to in order to do her job.

This is the body language of a woman who is uncomfortable. Not "just shy." Not "playing hard to get." Uninterested and uncomfortable, clearly.

Why wouldn't she just refuse to answer his questions, or be direct and tell him to leave her alone? For one, she's working. He's her customer. There's a certain level of courtesy and friendliness that is customary and expected from an employee working with the public. And it's not always easy to gauge exactly when it crosses the line into inappropriate-enough-to-say-something. While this guy's behavior got creepier and creepier as he ignored her cues that she wasn't interested, nothing he said was clearly problematic.

That's part of what is so frustrating about interactions like this. It's not like the guy is being gross or saying anything over the top. It's the relentlessness that's the issue. Question after question about her life. Some might say he was trying to be friendly or "just making conversation." No, he wasn't. Conversation is a two-way street. It's not a man peppering a woman with personal questions continually as she gives one-word answers and clearly doesn't want to keep talking.

Is it possible that he just isn't good at reading social cues? Sure. Is it possible that he thought he was flirting and that she would feel flattered by it? Sure. Is she still uncomfortable? Yes. Is his refusal to give up still creepy and inappropriate? Yes.

I'd venture a guess that nearly every woman out there has been in this young woman's shoes, unsure of whether our safety is at risk. It's easy to say, "Oh, come on. He was just talking." But this is a man who doesn't seem to respect boundaries in conversation—why would she expect him to respect boundaries in any other way?

Women constantly have to calculate whether men who make us uncomfortable are just awkward or if they are a threat, and it sucks. Just as we have to look for signs of potential danger, we certainly should be able to expect men to look for signs that we're not interested.

And if the man actually did notice her signals and purposely ignored them, then she was right to be wary. Being friendly is one thing. This is entirely another.

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10 anti-holiday recipes that prove the season can be tasty and healthy

Balance out heavy holiday eating with some lighter—but still delicious—fare.

Albertson's

Lighten your calorie load with some delicious, nutritious food between big holiday meals.

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The holiday season has arrived with its cozy vibe, joyous celebrations and inevitable indulgences. From Thanksgiving feasts to Christmas cookie exchanges to Aunt Eva’s irresistible jelly donuts—not to mention leftover Halloween candy still lingering—fall and winter can feel like a non-stop gorge fest.

Total resistance is fairly futile—let’s be real—so it’s helpful to arm yourself with ways to mitigate the effects of eating-all-the-things around the holidays. Serving smaller amounts of rich, celebratory foods and focusing on slowly savoring the taste is one way. Another is to counteract those holiday calorie-bomb meals with some lighter fare in between.

Contrary to popular belief, eating “light” doesn’t have to be tasteless, boring or unsatisfying. And contrary to common practice, meals don’t have to fill an entire plate—especially when we’re trying to balance out heavy holiday eating.

It is possible to enjoy the bounties of the season while maintaining a healthy balance. Whether you prefer to eat low-carb or plant-based or gluten-free or everything under the sun, we’ve got you covered with these 10 easy, low-calorie meals from across the dietary spectrum.

Each of these recipes has less than 600 calories (most a lot less) per serving and can be made in less than 30 minutes. And Albertsons has made it easy to find O Organics® ingredients you can put right in your shopping cart to make prepping these meals even simpler.

Enjoy!

eggs and green veggies in a skillet, plate of baconNot quite green eggs and ham, but closeAlbertsons

Breakfast Skillet of Greens, Eggs & Ham

273 calories | 20 minutes

Ingredients:

1 (5 oz) pkg baby spinach

2 eggs

1 clove garlic

4 slices prosciutto

1/2 medium yellow onion

1 medium zucchini squash

1/8 cup butter, unsalted

1 pinch crushed red pepper

Find full instructions and shopping list here.

bow of cauliflower ham saladGet your cauliflower power on.Albertsons

Creamy Cauliflower Salad with Ham, Celery & Dill

345 calories | 20 minutes

1/2 medium head cauliflower

1 stick celery

1/4 small bunch fresh dill

8 oz. ham steak, boneless

1/2 shallot

1/4 tspblack pepper

1/4 tsp curry powder

2 tsp Dijon mustard

1/4 tsp garlic powder

3 Tbsp mayonnaise

1/8 tsp paprika

2 tsp red wine vinegar

1/2 tsp salt

Find full instructions and shopping list here.

tofu on skewers on a plate with coleslawPlant-based food fan? This combo looks yums. Albertsons

Grilled Chili Tofu Skewers with Ranch Cabbage, Apple & Cucumber Slaw

568 calories | 20 minutes

1 avocado

1/2 English cucumber

1 (12 oz.) package extra firm tofu

1 Granny Smith apple

3 Tbsp (45 ml) Ranch dressing

1/2 (14 oz bag) shredded cabbage (coleslaw mix)

2 tsp chili powder

1 Tbsp extra virgin olive oil

1/2 tsp garlic powder

1/2 tsp salt

Find full instructions and shopping list here.

frittata in a cast iron skilletSometimes you just gotta frittata.Albertsons

Bell Pepper, Olive & Sun-Dried Tomato Frittata with Parmesan

513 calories | 25 minutes

6 eggs

1/2 cup Kalamata olives, pitted

2 oz Parmesan cheese

1 red bell pepper

1/2 medium red onion

8 sundried tomatoes, oil-packed

1/4 tsp black pepper

1 Tbsp extra virgin olive oil

1/2 tsp Italian seasoning

1/4 tsp salt

Find full instructions and shopping list here.

plate with slices of grilled chicken and a caprese saladCaprese, if you please.Albertsons

Balsamic Grilled Chicken with Classic Caprese Salad

509 calories | 25 minutes

3/4 lb chicken breasts, boneless skinless

1/2 small pkg fresh basil

1/2 (8 oz pkg) fresh mozzarella cheese

1 clove garlic

3 tomatoes

1 Tbsp balsamic vinegar

4 3/4 pinches black pepper

1 1/2 tsp extra virgin olive oil

3/4 tsp salt

Find full instructions and shopping list here.

four stuffed mushrooms on a plateThese mushrooms look positively poppable.Albertsons

Warm Goat Cheese, Parmesan & Sun-Dried Tomato Stuffed Mushrooms

187 calories | 35 minutes

1/2 lb cremini mushrooms

1 clove garlic

1/2 (4 oz) log goat cheese

1/4 cup Parmesan cheese, shredded

2 sundried tomatoes, oil-packed

1 1/4 pinches crushed red pepper

1 tsp extra virgin olive oil

1/4 tsp Italian seasoning

2 pinches salt

Find full instructions and shopping list here.

plate with open English muffin with goat cheese and sliced baby tomatoes on topMove over, avocado toast. English muffin pizzas have arrived.Albertsons

English Muffin Pizzas with Basil Pesto, Goat Cheese & Tomatoes

327 calories | 10 minutes

3 Tbsp (45 ml) basil pesto

2 English muffins

1/2 (4 oz) log goat cheese

1/2 pint grape tomatoes

3/4 pinch black pepper

2 pinches salt

Find full instructions and shopping list here.

pita pocket on a plate filled with veggies, meat and cheeseThis pita pocket packs a colorful punch.Albertsons

Warm Pita Pocket with Turkey, Cheddar, Roasted Red Peppers & Parsley

313 calories | 20 minutes

1/4 (8 oz) block cheddar cheese

1/2 bunch Italian (flat-leaf) parsley

4 oz oven roasted turkey breast, sliced

1/2 (12 oz) jar roasted red bell peppers

1 whole grain pita

3/4 pinch black pepper

1/2 tsp Dijon mustard

2 tsp mayonnaise

Find full instructions and shopping list here.

plate with toast smeared with avocado and topped with prosciuttoDid we say, "Move over, avocado toast?" What we meant was "Throw some prosciutto on it!" Albertsons

Avocado Toast with Crispy Prosciutto

283 calories | 10 minutes

1 avocado

2 slices prosciutto

2 slices whole grain bread

1 5/8 tsp black pepper

1/2 tsp extra virgin olive oil

1/8 tsp garlic powder

1/8 tsp onion powder

Find full instructions and shopping list here.

bowl of chili with cheese and green onions on topVegetarian chili with a fall twistAlbertsons

Black Bean & Pumpkin Chili with Cheddar

444 calories | 30 minutes

2 (15 oz can) black beans

1/2 (8 oz ) block cheddar cheese

2 (14.5 oz) cans diced tomatoes

2 cloves garlic

2 green bell peppers

1 small bunch green onions (scallions)

1 (15 oz) can pure pumpkin purée

1 medium yellow onion

1/2 tsp black pepper

5 7/8 tsp chili powder

1/2 tsp cinnamon

2 tsp cumin, ground

1 tsp salt

1 Tbsp virgin coconut oil

Find full instructions and shopping list here.

For more delicious and nutritious recipes, visit albertsons.com/recipes.

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