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People who are 'good at flirting' are sharing the clues that tell if someone likes you

Here are 15 great tips.

Man smiling behind heart hands
via Pexels

Are they flirting with me or just being nice?

Most of the time it’s tough to know if someone is flirting with you because they have to be subtle. They can’t be too obvious because if the feeling isn’t mutual it can be pretty embarrassing. It’s also tough to detect if someone is flirting because most of the time it’s someone you don’t know very well. Do they like me or are they normally friendly?

It hurts to imagine the number of times we’ve all missed signals that someone was interested in us and a potentially wonderful romance never happened. However, studies show that it happens more often than not.

A study on heterosexuals published in Psychology Today found that women were only 18% accurate in recognizing men’s flirting, while 36% of men were accurate about women's flirting. However, we’re really good at knowing when people aren’t flirting with us.

In the same study, women were 83% accurate in seeing friendliness as just friendliness, and men performed about the same at 84% accuracy.

Jeffery Hall, an assistant professor of communication studies at the University of Kansas in Lawrence, says there are five main styles of flirting: physical, traditional, polite, sincere, and playful.

Physical flirting involves “communicating sexual interest” to a potential partner. Traditional flirting is a tactic primarily used by introverts, where men tend to take the lead and women assume a passive role. Polite flirting involves the use of “proper manners” and is a cautious way of showing you like someone.

Sincere flirting involves telling the person you’re interested, and playful flirts like joking around but their efforts rarely turn into substantial relationships.

A Reddit user, who has since deleted their profile, asked a great question on the AskReddit subforum that should be a big help to those who have a hard time spotting flirtation. They asked, "People who are good at flirting, what are some social cues us oblivious people should watch out for?"

A large number of people who responded to the thread gave practical advice on the behaviors that are a giveaway that someone is flirting. The most popular responses are eye contact and laughing at your jokes, even if they aren’t funny.

Here are 15 of our favorite social cues that show someone is interested.

1. The dance of plausible deniability.

"Everyone is giving good advice, but flirting didn't click for me until i heard it described not as a set of behaviors to look out for, but as an escalation of suggestive behaviors couched in plausible deniability.

"Put practically, if someone is doing something to engage you that feels extra (lots of touching, looking at you in a way that feels a bit to long, or doing a lot of poking fun and complimenting you), then that might be flirting or it might not. That's the whole point. Plausible deniability. They can safely disengage at any time.

"If you want to know if someone's flirting, you need to test it. You do that by escalating things, but just a bit, so that now you have plausible deniability (touch them back in a comfortable way, maintain eye contact, or joke-compliment them back). If they escalate back and continue to do so as you escalate in turn, that is flirting. Eventually one of you will break cover and do something with clear intent (a kiss, an approach + ask for a number, or straight up telling them what you think of them and that you're interested). Otherwise, if you escalate and they don't change their behavior or they back off, then they were probably just being friendly and you should take the hint and do the same.

"Dunno if that's something obvious to people, but it was definitely not for me, and college parties would have been way less fun had i not known. Hopefully this can help someone else too :)" – three_furballs

2. Give 'em a chance to be alone.

"If you're in a group of friends (new or old), find a natural opportunity to hang back. Someone who's interested in you will notice and take the opportunity to talk to you in private. Now this isn't full [fool] proof but it'll at least give you the opportunity to feel for any chemistry between you." – Kagamid

3. Conversation should be two-sided.

"Be wary of a one-sided conversation. If your responses are met with mostly "yeps" and "uh huh" and nothing without meat, its probably not going well." – ViciousKnids

4. Ignoring their friend.

"If they look directly at you while talking to their friend it's a good sign." – yassis_bru

5. The reaction shot.

"I read once that if someone looks at you after someone (doesn't have to be you) said something funny and everyone is laughing, they like you. From personal experience, it's true." – luv_sicK

6. Lots of eye contact.

"They make a lot of eye contact. They are interested in what you have to say and ask you lots of questions. They laugh at your jokes, even the lame ones. They initiate physical contact. They try to find space where you can talk more privately (this does not always mean sex but it often means they wish for more quality time with you)." – TheSurfingRaichu

7. Trust then test.

"In my experience, almost everyone can get a sense that someone is into them, but most people second guess themselves until they convince themselves it's nothing. I say trust that sense. It's based off all of these factors that we pick up consciously and subconsciously, and almost always it's not a coincidence.

"When you think someone likes you, you can test that theory in a few ways. A subtle but effective example is inviting them to something you know they can't or don't want to attend. If they express interest in rescheduling or finding some other way to spend time with you, they like you. Otherwise they'll just say no, sorry I can't make it ... Of course, you could also just ask. In my experience anyone worth getting intimate with is mature enough to deal with that question." – MildlyWyld

8. Mirroring.

"Does their body turn toward you or away from you when you talk? Do they mirror your body language?" – Perfect_Draw516

9. They touch you.

"Physical contact. Granted, not everyone flirts the same way but a good sign is if they touch your arm (or the like) or you find them smiling the whole time that you’re talking to them." – Cosmic_Marman

10. Special eye contact.

"When you're in a public space, the direct eye contact (for a beat or two too long) and the look away. One of my go-to moves that always yielded results." – LuLu42

11. Bad jokes.

"Seriously tell a bad joke - look for laughter and smiles that should not be there but are. Then it’s you they are into, definitely not what you said." – YukonBrawler

12. Facial gestures.

"According to Sherlock: licking lips, eyes cast down towards the other persons lips, quirky smile of the lips, dilated eyes. And if the person has long hair, tucking it behind their ear or other fidgety behavior." – fandomfangirl1

13. Mimicking body language.

"In the case of someone who likes you, while interacting, watch for repetitious patterns and mimic their body language. Eventually, if you cross your arms and the person whose attention you are seeking does the same, for example, you can rely on that being a good sign." – flungkle

14. Little adjustment.

"I've noticed that women will do a little adjustment to you, like brushing off a little piece of lint off your lapel or moving a stray hair off your face while talking to you. At least they did back in my rogue days." – robfrankel1

15. Take your shot.

"If you're at a bar and a woman makes eye contact for more than a second without looking away, shoot your shot." – sle7in360

There you have it! If you're picking up any of these signs, it might mean you can go ahead and shoot your shot (respectfully!). Good luck out there!

This article originally appeared three years ago.

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Walking Alongside Martu: A journey with one of the world’s oldest living cultures

Pura’s inaugural impact collection honors both sacred traditions and sustainable futures.

James Roh
True

In a world driven by speed, efficiency, and immediate results, it’s easy to forget that lasting change is built on trust. Real impact doesn’t come from rushing toward an end goal or measuring success through lofty metrics. It comes from falling in love with the problem, building a community around it, and sharing a vision for lasting transformation.

Pura, the smart home fragrance company that marries premium fragrance with innovative technology, recently launched its inaugural impact collection with K Farmer Dutjahn Foundation (KFDF) and Dutjahn Sandalwood Oils (DSO). The Pura x Dutjahn partnership began with a clear purpose: to source a sacred ingredient directly from its origin while honoring the land and the people who’ve cared for it. Our goal wasn’t simply to find sandalwood — it was to find a community and an ingredient that embody exceptional land stewardship, ethical harvesting, and transformative, community-led impact. After careful research and over three years of development, we saw an opportunity to secure a premium, luxurious ingredient while supporting a regenerative supply chain that invests in Indigenous-led education, economic opportunity, and land stewardship.

James Roh

Over the past several years, we’ve walked alongside Martu, an Indigenous tribe from the vast Western Australian desert. Martu are one of the oldest living cultures in the world, with a history spanning 60,000 years. As nomadic hunter-gatherers, they have unparalleled ecological knowledge, passed down through generations, making them the traditional custodians of the land. Their approach to sandalwood harvesting isn’t driven by market demand but by a deep respect for seasonal rhythms, land health, and cultural law. Their work adapts to the environment—whether it’s “sorry time,” when mourning pauses activities, or the harsh desert conditions that make travel and communication difficult. Martu operate on Martu time, a deliberate rhythm shaped by millennia of experience, far removed from the rapid-swipe, hyper-productive pace of Western systems.

Martu’s ecological knowledge isn’t documented in baseline reports. It’s lived, carried in stories, and practiced with rigor and respect for the changing needs of the ecosystems. True partnership means unlearning the typical approach. It means standing beside—not in front—and recognizing that the wisdom and leadership we need already exist within these communities. Our role isn’t to define the work, but to support it, protect it, and learn from it.

James Roh

Tonight, as I spoke with Chairman Clinton Farmer and the KFDF team about our focus for this piece, I learned that Clinton’s truck had broken down (again), leaving him to “limp” back to town from the desert at low speeds for hours and hours. He had been awake since 3:00 a.m. This is a common and costly setback, one that disrupts the harvest, demands days of driving, and brings real financial and emotional strain. These barriers are relentless and persistent, part of the harsh reality Clinton and his community face daily. It's easy for outsiders, detached from the reality on the ground, to impose rules, regulations, and demands from afar. Rather than continuing to impose, we need to truly partner with communities — equipping them with the resources to operate sustainably, avoid burnout, and protect the very land they love and care for. All while they endeavor to share these incredible, sacred ingredients with the world and build an economic engine for their people.

There is much to learn, but we are here to listen, adapt, and stay the course. The future we need will not be built in quarterly cycles. It will be built in trust, over time, together.

To learn more about the partnership and fragrances, visit Pura x Dutjahn.

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Mom gives a tour of her typical 'middle-class home' and it's exactly what people needed

"There is just so much pressure on social media to be perfect."

@steph_murphy/TikTok

Stephanie Murphy shares her "average" home in viral TikTok video.

Sure, it’s lovely to see pristine, perfectly curated homes that look like they belong in Architectural Digest. A little inspo never hurt anyone. But as we all know, the spotless life is simply not an achievable reality, especially for those with busy lives and limited budgets (read: most of us).

But you know what? Maybe even the messy homes deserve some love. The ones with constant junk piles, unfinished projects, dirty dishes, and misplaced toys. The homes that will never grace the cover of a magazine but still do a wonderful job of containing all the moments life has to offer—the big, small, extraordinary, mundane, and everywhere in between. 'Cause at the end of the day, isn’t that a home’s true purpose anyway?


@stephsharesitall

Lets normalize “average” because there is nothing wrong with it. Everywhere you look on social media you see big gorgeous houses in perfect condition and its hard not to compare yours to them. But its not the norm and half the time its staged. Our house is lived in, and its filled with love and tons of memories and at the end of the day thats all that matters.

Stephanie Murphy, a mom and TikTok creator, seems to think so. Murphy recently took viewers on an “average house tour,” and it was the exact opposite of aspirational. Highlighted in Murphy’s tour are the pantry door that’s remained unpainted for three years, blinds held together with binder clips, air conditioners held in place by duct tape, a full dish rack tray that’s “a permanent fixture” on their countertops, and not one but two junk drawers (honestly, that’s a little low by my count). You’ll also notice a fridge that is covered in her kid’s artwork and school pictures. Not in any cohesive way, but merely thrown on randomly, as nature intended.

Meanwhile, in the master bedroom, Murphy and her husband’s bed have two separate blankets because neither of them like to share. A genius idea, and just another example of how we really, really don’t need to continue with marital sleeping norms that don’t actually feel comfortable.

As for why Murphy decided to showcase her “average, middle-class house,” it’s all in the caption of her video: “Let’s normalize ‘average’ because there is nothing wrong with it. Everywhere you look on social media, you see big gorgeous houses in perfect condition and it’s hard not to compare yours to them. But it’s not the norm and half the time it's staged. Our house is lived in, and it’s filled with love and tons of memories and at the end of the day that's all that matters."

She further explained her reasoning to Good Morning America. "I feel like social media is full of one perfectly curated video after another, and there is just so much pressure from social media to be perfect in all aspects -- to have perfect skin, perfect makeup, perfect outfit, perfect house. And the reality is no one's perfect," Murphy said.

"Honestly, I feel like there's a very good chance that all those videos that we see were staged and they probably like, moved a pile of toys behind the camera to film and then moved it back when they were done. But that's the part that people on social media just aren't sharing. They don't show you the behind-the-scenes and that is what I was looking to change," she continued.


Judging from the comments sections of this now-viral post, it seems like other people are ready for more average content.

“This is awesome! I’m constantly feeling inadequate when people have a perfect house that looks like nobody lives there!” one person wrote. “I feel seen,” added another.

Hear, hear. No need to feel inadequate about having a home that’s lived in. Imperfection has its own kind of beauty.

This article originally appeared two years ago.

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Parenting

George Lucas finally explains why Yoda talks so weird and it just might help parents

Parents may want to take notes.

Photo by Kevin Payravi via Wikimedia and Takashi Toyooka via Flickr

The way Yoda talks could be an excellent tool for parents.

Parenting is certainly an interesting gig at times, but most parents likely never thought Yoda would be modeling child-rearing behavior. The little green guy that speaks in what sometimes feels like riddles was written like that purposely according to George Lucas—and it's something parents might want to take note of. Lucas, the man behind the Star Wars franchise was recently interviewed at the TCM Classic Film Festival's screening of The Empire Strikes Back for the film's 45th anniversary.

Longtime TCM host Ben Mankiewicz was the moderator of the event and finally got to ask a question that has been on people's minds for years: Why on earth did that little green Jedi master talk backwards?

Star Wars, Muppets, Frank Oz, social issues, gender rolesYoda is/was strong with the "Force." Photo by Riku Lu on Unsplash

The short story is, because Lucas wanted him to. The longer version (that fans actually wanted to know) is that Yoda's way of speaking is almost a Jedi move in itself. His speech is a psychological trick that can benefit parents who have children who struggle with listening—especially preteens.

Lucas explained, "Because if you speak regular English, people won’t listen that much. But if he had an accent, or it’s really hard to understand what he’s saying, they focus on what he’s saying. He was basically the philosopher of the movie." He continued, “I had to figure out a way to get people to actually listen—especially 12-year-olds.”

This is a tactic that some parents have used whether knowingly or not—and there's science behind it. For example, parents change their speech to a whisper when reprimanding their children in public settings to get their attention and correct unwanted behavior. Turns out this technique may also be beneficial inside the home as well.

According to The Wichita Eaglein 2008, "Wichita State audiology professor Ray Hull would say the children heard something unusual and irresistible: an adult they can understand. Because the trick to get children to listen to really hear and comprehend, whether they're toddlers or high school students isn't speaking up, Hull says. It's slowing down. According to Hull, the average adult speaks at a rate of almost 170 words per minute. But the average 5- to 7- year-old processes speech at a rate of only 120 words per minute. The gap between what a child hears and what he or she understands can appear to parents and teachers as inattention, confusion or outright defiance."

gif, star wars, speech, talking, language, childrenthe empire strikes back GIF by Star WarsGiphy

In 2013, the International Journal of Speech-Language Pathology researched the affects of rate of speech on comprehension abilities of typically developing school-aged children in Sweden. While the sample size was small, just 102 children, researchers were able to show that when children were spoken to in normal, slow, and fast rates of speech, the children were much more likely to comprehend the information given at the slow rate of speech.

Slowing things down is exactly what Mister Rogers did. According to Hull, the late children's show host spoke at a rate of 124 words per minute, which seemed to be the key in captivating his young audience. But speaking slowly isn't always enough. Parenting experts explain that parents should get down on the child's level and make eye contact before speaking. For older kids, gaining their attention by calling their name, moving closer to them, or placing a hand on their shoulder before speaking slowly will aid in getting them to hear the words coming out of your mouth. These techniques also work for children that have auditory processing disorder according to Nemours Kids Health.

yoda, grogu, star wars, speech, talk, slow speechSipping Tea Time GIFGiphy

Of course, Yoda isn't parenting real human children, but the way he speaks captures the attention of audience members young and old. But if you don't want to slow down and speak backwards, speaking at a lower volume may also do the trick.

"If someone starts speaking really loud or yelling at you, your immediate response is usually fight or flight. You just want to get away from them. Our children are no different. So when we get louder, they listen less. On the other hand, the more softly a person speaks, the more closely everybody else listens to them. We want to hear what we might be missing out on! And unless your child has a genuine physical ailment that affects their ability to hear, they will respond in the same way," parenting expert and author Dr Justin Coulson writes for Happy Families Australia.

Lucas likely didn't set out to give some solid parenting advice when explaining why he made Yoda speak in such a strange manner, but surely there's a parent out there who just may want to give this method a try.

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A college student was fed up with a classmate taking his seat. Then he saw his own ignorance.

Things are not always as they appear.

Photo credit: Canva

Don't judge a book by its cover.

You know that feeling you get when you walk into a classroom and see someone else's stuff on your desk? OK, sure, there are no assigned seats, but you've been sitting at the same desk since the first day and everyone knows it. So why does the guy who sits next to you put his phone, his book, his charger, his lunch, and his laptop in the space that's rightfully yours? It's annoying.

All you want to do was walk in, sit down, get out your notebook and (try to) pay attention. But now? Now you've got to talk to a stranger about moving their stuff and there goes your day, already bogged down with petty annoyances. Sound familiar?

classroom, desk, classmates, claiming a seatEven when there's no assigned seat, everyone knows where they usually sit.Photo credit: Canva

We've all got so much to do these days that interacting with people we see every day — not our friends, but our classmates, fellow commuters, co-workers, the people in line for coffee with us every day — can feel like a burden. So, when these people do something we perceive as annoying, like putting their stuff on our desks, we don't have the time or the energy to assume their intentions or think about the lives they're leading.

But if we stepped out of ourselves for a second, we might just realize that we're all much more connected than we think, that our preconceived notions of others are usually just that — preconceived. And, often, inaccurate.

That's why this X story about a guy who learned an important life lesson from a classmate he was frustrated with has resonated with thousands. It's the perfect example of that "don't judge a book by its cover" adage we should have all learned in preschool but sometimes forget. And it starts the exact same way as this post — with a college student groaning on the inside as he sees someone's stuff on his desk.

Thomas McFall (@thomas___mcfall) wrote:

"So in one of my Management classes I sit in the same seat in the front every day. Every single day I sit there. Now, I also sit next to some foreign guy that barely speaks English. The most advanced thing I've heard this guy say in English is 'Wow, my muffin is really good.'

This guy also has a habit of stacking every item he owns in the exact space I sit. His bag, his food, his books, and his phone are ALWAYS right on my desk space.

Now, every single time I walk into class this guy says 'Ah, Tom. You here. Okay.' And starts frantically clearing my desk of his belongings. He then makes it a habit to say 'Ready for class, yeah?' And gives me a high five. Every day this guy gives me a high five.

I was ALWAYS annoyed with this guy. I'm thinking 'Dude, you know I sit in this seat every day. Why are you always stacking your shit here? And the last thing I want to do is give a guy who barely speaks my language high fives at 8 in the morning.' Just get your shit off my desk.

But today I came to class and was running a few minutes late. I'm standing outside because I had to send a quick text. I could see my usual space through the door out of the corner of my eye. Of course, my desk was filled with his belongings. The usual.

As I'm standing there on my phone another guy who was also late walks into the class before me and tried to take my seat since it's closest to the door. The guy sitting next to me stops this dude from sitting down and says 'I'm sorry. My good friend Thomas sits here.'

It was then that I realized this guy wasn't putting stuff on my seat to annoy me. He was saving me the seat every morning. And this whole time he saw me as a friend but I was too busy thinking about myself to take him into consideration. Cheesy as it sounds, I was touched.

I ended up going into class and of course he cleared the seat and said 'Ah, Tom. You here. Okay.' And I did get a high five. At the end of class I ended up asking him if he wanted to get a bite to eat with me. We did. And we talked for a while. I got through the broken English.

The guy moved here from the Middle East to pursue a college education in America. He plans to go back after he gets his degree. He's got two kids and a wife. He works full time and sends his all his left over money back home to his wife.

I asked him how he liked America as well. He said he misses his family but it's exciting to be here. He also said 'Not every American is nice to me like you are, Tom.' I bought lunch, of course. Dude deserves it. He gave me a high five for buying lunch. Gotta keep up tradition.

Moral of the story? Don't do what I do and constantly only think about yourself. It took me nearly the entire semester to get my head out of my ass and realize this guy was just trying to be my friend. Better late than never I suppose."

If not for this one day running late, McFall may have never realized what his classmate was trying to do. And he may have continued to think of him as annoying, maybe telling others about "the weird guy who was always trying to take up my space"... when all the guy was really trying to do was be kind. We all misinterpret the actions of others sometimes. It's easy to do that!

But if there's one thing this story reminds us, it's that it's important to stop and remember that while you're living your life, other people are living theirs, so assuming best intentions can do us a great favor. That's why we should step outside of our bubbles and engage with the world on a regular basis. You could make a new friend. You might brighten someone's day.

But most importantly, getting out of your own head, checking your own biases, and giving others the benefit of the doubt will make you a more compassionate person. You don't have to engage with everyone you meet, but the next time someone smiles and offers you a high-five? Maybe just take them up on it.

This article was originally published seven years ago.

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Best friends get divorced at the same time and move in together to co-parent their 6 kids

"Two single moms who realized we didn't have to do it alone."

shannonnjune/TikTok

Best friends coparent their children together after going through divorces at same time.

Becoming a single parent after divorce can be an overwhelming challenge. For best friends Shannon Foote (@shannonnjune) and Cheyanne Marie (@_cheyanne_marie_), who both went through divorces at the same time in 2024, they leaned on each other to get through.

Together, they decided to move into a home to co-parent their collective six kids together (Foote has four children, and Cheyanne Marie has two).

"Pro tip: get a divorce at the same time as your best friend and become 2 moms raising 6 kids," she captioned the post. "Two moms is better."

@shannonnjune

Two moms is better #bestfriend #singlemom

In the video, the two share clips from an average day in their life and all that it entails to take care of (and keep up with) their six kids. They do everything as a team, from folding mounds of laundry together to cleaning and supervising their kids as they play.

In another video, Foote and Cheyanne Marie conquer more household chores. In the kitchen, they bag up trash, empty the dishwasher, and clean the countertops and stove. Plus, they get in some more laundry folding and watching their kids play together in their backyard.

@shannonnjune

Life is easier with a village!!! #coparenting #bestfriend #momsoftiktok #singlemom #momof4 And because I know the comments coming lol, we both very much like men but two women splitting house and kid chores has proven easier than with men 😅

"Life is easier with a village!!!" they captioned the post. They also added, "And because I know the comments coming lol, we both very much like men but two women splitting house and kid chores has proven easier than with men 😅."

The friends also shared how they divide and conquer when it comes to putting their kids to bed. "We really live the fullest life ❤️🥰🫶," Foote captioned the post. After a fun night of dying Easter eggs as a family, they get to it. Cheyanne Marie takes over laundry folding duties, while Foote cleans the kitchen and living room.

@shannonnjune

We really live the fullest life ❤️🥰🫶 #singlemom #mom #singlemomof4 #momof4 #singlemoms #coparenting #village


Both moms also have jobs. Foote is an electrical contractor, and Cheyanne Marie is a painting contractor.

Foote and Cheyanne Marie have shared more about what went into their decision to move in together to co-parent. "Last year after our divorces, we reached out to each other just to have a good friend while navigating single motherhood," Foote wrote. "Slowly we started spending every night together, our kids started calling us auntie, and life felt normal."

TikTok · shannonnjune

TikTok · shannonnjunewww.tiktok.com

Their videos have gotten lots of support from moms and women going through divorces in co-parenting situations. One wrote, "This is THE FUTURE." Another added, "Being surrounded by their best friends having slumber parties every night probably makes it a little easier for the kids too! I love this you both are doing great! 💝"

Other women shared their experience growing up in similar households or trying this parenting method themselves. "My mom & 2 of her girlfriends did this when I was little & they all got divorced at the same time. it was 3 of them & 8 of us kids.... best childhood memories I have!" one wrote. Another added, "Me and my bestie did this, both left our abusive bds 2 years ago, got a apartment together with our babies and watched them while each other worked. Best thing we ever did."

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Ancient Hawaiian land system could transform sustainability's future—and it’s going viral

Welcome to the world of Ahupua’a.

Photo credit: Canva

Ancient Hawaiians were agricultural masters.

Switch to electric, use less water, recycle everything: in a time when fighting climate change seems insurmountable, an incredible solution is re-emerging from the ancient past—and it’s making major waves on TikTok. The ahupuaʻa system, Hawai’i’s approach to land management before the once-sovereign nation was colonized, is shocking the world as people discover its incredible potential to revolutionize sustainability—and potentially solve our modern climate crisis.


@ben_jamin_witu You cannot convince me we are more technologically advanced when ancient societies used nature as their technology and balanced themselves for thousands of years. VC: Hyperspective on IG. #landback #foodsoverignty #indigenous #wisdom #tiktok #fyp ♬ Lights Are On - Instrumental - Edith Whiskers

Meet Benjamin Kaimipono (@ben_jamin_witu), a Native Hawaiian (Kanaka ‘Ōiwi) TikTok creator whose videos—some original, some reposts—about Native Hawaiian life, practices, and history are creating a vitally important tapestry of a culture erased. One of the videos, a repost from @hyperspective on Instagram, (a boutique creative agency in Honolulu) depicts a simulated version of the Hawaiian ahupua’a system with the caption: “You cannot convince me we are more technologically advanced when ancient societies used nature as their technology and balanced themselves for thousands of years.”

The responses are filled with pride, respect, and wonder. One commenter wrote, “This is why land back is crucial today with global warming at an all-time high! Indigenous peoples are in tune with the land and know better than anyone else how to take care of it ✊🏽.” Others appreciated Kaimipono's sharing of Native Hawaiian knowledge, with one person writing: “This... is the proper use of the 'āina. live and learn and always Aloha 'Āina. Proud to be Hawaiian. Ha'aheo au. 😎🤙🏾” (According to Lāna'i Culture & Heritage Center, “'āina” is generally translated as “land” but directly means “that which feeds”; “Ha'aheo au” means “I am proud.”)

Another wrote:

“Hawaiians understood what it meant to live righteously off the land, and we're centuries ahead of their time with resource management. There's connection to the land is a key value. That's why native cultures always knew how to be sustainable with the resources they had, and didn't overuse or destroy it.”

Hawai'i, Native Hawaiians, land, sustainability, climate changeEach ahupua'a land parcel Photo credit: Canva


Why this ancient system works

The ahupua’a system, which thrived in Hawai’i for nearly a millennium between 1000 CE to 1848, wasn’t just smart—it was mathematic, geologic, and climatic genius. Picture this: 725 perfectly organized sections across eight islands. Each land parcel averages 5,678 and works in perfect harmony with nature. It was symbiosis at its finest: each ahupua’a operated like a self-contained utopia, combining forests, crops, and fishing zones, demonstrating a master class in resource management. This way, Hawaiians were able harness the power of the ecosystems around them while both supporting the 800,000 people living on the islands (and growing) and maintaining the land’s integrity.

In their seminal paper, “The Ahupua’a as a Traditional Hawaiian Resource Management Model for a Sustainable Coastal Environment,” researchers David W. Blane and Christopher Chung describe the ahupua’a as “a practical and rational approach to resources management that conforms with the existing geography and its resources rather than altering them for human convenience,” adding:

“…as you may already have surmised, the ahupua‘a means much more. The ahupua‘a embodies a unique relationship between the Hawaiian people and the land as well as the practical and rational approaches applied to insure the sustainability of the natural environment from overexploitation, pollution, and extinction.”


HHawai'i, Native Hawaiians, land, sustainability, climate changeawaiian landAn ahupua'a map.Wikipedia

Land management magic

This could get very scientific very fast, but here’s the simple version: ahupua’a were wedge-shaped land units that spanned from the mountains (mauka) down through the cultivated lowlands (mala) to the sea (makai). This way, each unit, each slice, had everything they needed to survive: forests to harvest wood from and collect bird feathers; irrigated agricultural terraces (lo’i) where they mostly grew taro, and dryland farms used to cultivate sweet potato (’uala), coconuts (niu), breadfruit (’ulu), and bananas (mai’a), just to name a few. Each ahupua’a also contained a coastal and marine area, where Hawaiians could fish and produce salt.

The leadership structure was also pure brilliance: each ahupua’a had its own chief (ali’i), overseer (konohiki), and priests (kahuna) who worked together, overseeing the administration of their land and ensuring that resources were used efficiently and sustainably. But perfection on this scale takes more than just good delegation; the ahupua’a leadership also incorporated important Native Hawaiian values like respect (aloha), cooperation (laulima), and stewardship (mālama) to ensure that everything remained balanced (pono). According to the North Shore Sustainable Communities Plan, here’s what made it all work:

  • When resources ran low, they immediately stopped harvesting to preserve resources.
  • They closed certain fishing areas seasonally so fish populations could bounce back.
  • Inter-ahupua’a trade was commonplace, so residents felt connected, and the system kept strong.

fruit, land, sustainability, Hawai'i, ahupua'aAhupua'a was a brilliant, sustainable practice.Thorsten

"The Hawaiians believed that the land, the sea, the clouds and all of nature had a certain interconnectedness, which is why they used all of the resources around them to reach the desired balance in life." - Nation of Hawaii

As we watch our food systems fall apart, coastlines disappear, and farmlands struggle, remember: it doesn’t have to be this way. Modern urban planners could take a page out of the ancient Native Hawaiian’s book, as they construct our future cities, structures, and systems. No one is asking for a 180 total rehaul or a return to 1848. But there are small things we can do. In Hawai’i, they’ve already brought a few of these principles back to life. They’re restoring traditional fishponds, reconnecting forests with their corresponding coastal areas, and empowering local communities to steward their own resources. This is a real, sustainable way forward. Or, as the BBC said: “The ahupuaʻa system of land development, in practice for more than 1,000 years, has the potential to show the world a new path to sustainability." Are you ready to be a part of that change?

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