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Bacon hidden in a casserole teaches an important lesson on antisemitism and family boundaries

“See, we told you nothing bad would happen.”

AITA; Reddit; antisemitism; family boundaries; kosher

Emotional Reddit thread teaches lesson on antisemitism

If you've never been on Reddit, there's a section titled "Am I the A**h*le" aptly abbreviated AITA where people ask for clarification on a difficult situation. The idea is that commenters will help you decipher if you are being the jerk in a situation or if it's the other person involved that holds the title.

A Jewish dad and his two children took to this subreddit to seek his own clarification. The dad, who doesn't give his name for obvious reasons, explains that he is a remarried widower who came into his second marriage with two children by his deceased wife. He tells readers that his current wife isn't Jewish but also isn't particularly religious while her parents are and have attempted to convince his daughter to be baptized Christian.


Boundaries were set according to the post and the family ate dinner at the in-laws house prior to Thanksgiving. Even if you know nothing of Jewish religion, you know that those who follow religious doctrine eat foods that are kosher, which is something that had been explained to the in-laws and they had always abided by.


After the meal was finished, his mother-in-law remarked, “See, we told you nothing bad would happen.” and upon further clarification, she admitted to mixing bacon into the casserole dishes. While he says the father-in-law appeared to be uncomfortable, he agreed that he knew what his wife had done to the food. The situation resulted in his daughter crying and leaving the room with the child's stepmother following close behind. The poster's son, who is 15 had some choice words for his step-grandparents.

AITA; Reddit; antisemitism; family boundaries; kosher

woman in white t-shirt and jeans arguing with a man in black shirt in a kitchen

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The entire situation created a rift between not just the in-laws and the person who posted, but with the wife (stepmother) as well. It seems his wife stayed behind at her parents' house after her husband and stepchildren left. She eventually returned home to be with the family she married into. But the damage had been done after she supposedly sided with her parents in saying her stepson had to apologize before being welcome to Thanksgiving dinner being hosted by her parents.

The thousands of comments were overwhelmingly supportive and turned the comment section into a master class on confronting antisemitism.

And while I certainly don't believe tampering with someone's food when you're aware of their religious restrictions is subtle, it may not be as clear as some of the more overt examples. But Merriam-Webster defines antisemitic as, "feeling or showing hostility toward or discrimination against Jews as a cultural, racial, or ethnic group," which is exactly what the Reddit poster's mother-in-law displayed by sneakily adding bacon to the family's food.

AITA; Reddit; antisemitism; family boundaries; kosher

Man and woman facing away from each other on a couch

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Commenter, Millerlicious said, "Yup. I’m Jewish, my fiancé is from a Catholic family. They might not have always understood my religion or diet, but they would have never snuck pork into my food. That is some disgusting level of antisemitism. I would be reevaluating this whole marriage."

Another commenter, melloussa wrote, "As a Muslim who doesn't eat pork I would feel so violated and cry like your daughter. This is just evil disrespect. They are not trying to convert you, they are just trying to prove to you that you are wrong. I would go completely NC. NTA."

The majority of the commenters did not think the 15-year-old son should have to apologize and many thought the marriage may be too broken to salvage. The update given provided some hope explaining that he and his wife will be attending counseling and he will be speaking to his Rabbi. There will be no further contact between his children and their step-grandparents for the foreseeable future.

All images provided by CARE & Cargill

The impact of the CARE and Cargill partnership goes beyond empowering cocoa farmers

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Cocoa, the key ingredient found in your favorite chocolate bar, has been a highly revered food product throughout human history. It’s been used for religious ceremonies in Peru, royal feasts in England and France, traded as currency for the ancient Mayans. And considering that many of us enjoy chocolate on a regular basis (mochas and candy bars, anyone?) it seems like that love is still going strong even today.

And if you are someone who looks forward to that sweet chocolate pick-me-up on a regular basis, you likely have the women of West Africa to thank.

Women like Barbara Sika Larweh, a mother of six who works as a cocoa farmer in Larwehkrom, a community located within the Sefwi Wiawso Municipality in the Western North Region of Ghana.

care, cargillMama Cash now empowers other women to gain independence

Nearly 60% of the world’s cocoa comes from both Ghana and Côte d’Ivoire, where Barbara and other mothers make up over half of the labor force. These female cocoa farmers shoulder the same physical burden as their male counterparts—all while also running households and paying for their children to go to school. And yet, they typically don’t receive equal income. Nor do they have access to the resources that could help them achieve financial independence.

Thankfully, positive changes are taking place. Barbara’s story exemplifies the impact of programs offered by CARE and Cargill, such as Village Savings and Loan Association (VSLA), which are small groups that offer low-interest loans to individuals living in poverty, helping them to build savings without going into devastating debt.

Through these initiatives, women, like Barbara, are equipped with vital knowledge like financial literacy to improve household incomes, sustainable agriculture practices that improve yields, and nutrition education to diversify their family’s diets.

“They came and trained me on the VSLA. I dedicated myself and volunteered so that I would be able to train my people, too,” Barbara explains.

Within the first year of using the programs, Barbara and the people she trained profited—earning her the nickname of “Mama Cash.”

This is no isolated event. In cocoa-growing communities supported by CARE and Cargill programming between 2019-2022, the number of households living below the national poverty line decreased by nearly 32% in Cote d’Ivoire and Ghana - as a direct result of increasing and diversifying income through using these programs.

Like Barbara, who today is an executive member of the Community Development Committee, more than 2.4 million women have used their success as entrepreneurs to transform into leaders and decision-makers within their communities. Whether it’s giving most of their earnings back to their families, reducing child labor, or exponentially increasing overall farm yields, the rippling effect is profound.

The impact of the CARE and Cargill partnership goes beyond empowering cocoa farmers. The joint initiatives have fostered progress on complex global issues related to social justice, such as gender equality, climate change, and food security. By improving access to quality nutrition, water, and hygiene, the joint programs have positively influenced the cocoa communities’ well-being.

Suddenly there’s a lot more to think about the next time you eat a candy bar.

Find out more about the important partnership between CARE and Cargill here.

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Total strangers helped this woman find her favorite childhood toy

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NPS/Kurt Moses (Public Domain)

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