5 ways everyday citizens can start holding police departments accountable

This article first appeared on ProPublica. You can read it here. The death of George Floyd at the hands of police in Minneapolis has drawn historic levels of interest in police misconduct and drawn condemnation from law enforcement leaders nationwide. As a reporter covering law enforcement for the Asbury Park Press in New Jersey, and…

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Photo credit: assets.rebelmouse.io Array

This article first appeared on ProPublica. You can read it here.

The death of George Floyd at the hands of police in Minneapolis has drawn historic levels of interest in police misconduct and drawn condemnation from law enforcement leaders nationwide.

As a reporter covering law enforcement for the Asbury Park Press in New Jersey, and now in partnership with ProPublica’s Local Reporting Network, I use investigative reporting techniques to strengthen police accountability. Other journalists do the same. But, in truth, any citizen can apply the same methods to ensure the law enforcement system they’re funding is serving them well.

Police culture can be insular and tough to penetrate. But I’ve been surprised by how often it’s possible, though time consuming, to expose important issues by requesting and examining records and data from police departments and other government agencies and engaging citizens and key leaders. So here are five techniques concerned citizens, journalists and policymakers can use to examine police conduct in their communities.


1. Understand the policies and laws that govern police conduct.

If you’re alarmed by what you saw in Minneapolis, or other recent incidents of apparent police misconduct, the first step is to find out if the agency in question has a written policy on the use of force. Does the policy dictate when officers should or shouldn’t use force? What tactics are they allowed to use? Is there any rule against choking a suspect?

It’s important to know if the officers involved were following the policies and procedures that are supposed to guide their behavior. Police actions that strike an onlooker as inappropriate may actually be within a department’s rules. It’s possible the rules themselves are inconsistent with best practices elsewhere.

Ask the department for its policies on the practices that concern you, like restraining suspects or the use of pepper spray or Tasers. You may also need to request rules set by a county or state authority. Ask for written copies. You may be required to file a formal public records request, which I will describe below. And if there is no existing written policy, that might be something worth questioning itself.

If you’re having trouble understanding a policy, try running it by an attorney, academic, elected official or a journalist in your community.

How I did it: I did a deep dive into policies about drug testing after a police captain was killed in a car crash in 2016, and I exposed that he was drunk and on drugs at the time. I spoke to his chief and learned their department didn’t have a policy for random drug testing. I wondered why that was the case and looked to the state attorney general’s office, which sets many police rules. The rules allowed departments to choose whether they wanted to do random testing, and my reporting identified more than 100 that did not. After our story, the state attorney general mandated random drug testing for cops across the state.

2. You are entitled to public records that can show whether rules are being followed. Get them.

Your tax dollars pay for just about everything a police department does, which includes generating tons of reports, dispatch logs, video recordings and data about what officers do every day. Any citizen is entitled to see those public records to understand how the government works.

The agency may say the public records law does not allow you to have access to some documents — information about confidential informants and medical records, for example. The laws that dictate what’s considered public vary by state, so check out the national guide by the Reporters Committee for Freedom of the Press. Information the agency considers off limits may also be redacted, and it may take time to get a response.

Even with the hassles and limitations, public records laws are empowering and I’ve been surprised by how much I can obtain. My policy is always to ask and make a records clerk explain why I can’t have taxpayer-funded records. Follow up to ensure important requests aren’t lost or ignored. Assume you should be able to see everything. Your state’s public records law may even include a presumption that records are open and exemptions are an exception. You may run into roadblocks that you can’t overcome on your own. In some cases, journalism organizations have had to sue to obtain public records. Your budget may not allow for an attorney, but some states have mediators that you can go to if you think your request is being wrongly denied.

It’s striking how much information the government collects but then does not review. So you might be the first person to ask for a particular body of records and put them together to identify an important trend which you can share with leaders who weren’t paying attention to the issue. Your local journalists may also be very interested in the information you have gathered.

Sometimes it’s hard to even know which records exist. That’s where documents commonly known as records retention schedules come in handy. Government agencies use these to track which records they keep and how long they hold onto them. Use the schedules to help you see what you might be able to obtain. These are available all over the country. Just for fun, I looked up the city of Los Angeles — they call them records disposition schedules and found them for agencies ranging from the Police Department to the zoo. The agency of interest to you might use a different name for the document, so call them and ask if they have a written guide that shows which records they maintain and for how long.

How I did it: I started investigating police car chases after I saw the government keeps summaries of those incidents, including how many people are arrested or injured. I saw I could add up those figures and see if the benefits of the chases outweighed the risks and harm. I discovered that chases in recent years usually didn’t end with an arrest, and that lots of people get hurt, including cops and bystanders.

If you’re interested in scrutinizing the type of misconduct we saw in Minneapolis, you could request use of force reports. New Jersey made those public a few years ago, and Newark Star-Ledger journalists used them to great effect. ProPublica has that data available here for a fee.

If I were investigating a case of violence by the police I’d ask for:

  • The use of force reports filed by the officers involved.
  • Related incident reports.
  • Computer-assisted dispatch reports.
  • 911 phone call recordings.
  • Body-worn and vehicle-mounted camera recordings.

I might also request policies that dictate how an agency handles complaints against officers. Some states consider substantiated complaints against individual officers to be public records, so you could request them, depending on where you live. WNYC has a helpful breakdown of where that information is public. If you’re looking for video from police body cameras, the Reporters Committee has a guide that shows the places where those are considered public. If you want to obtain recordings of 911 calls, they have a guide for those, too.

You could also be more general and ask the relevant department for substantiated internal affairs complaints alleging excessive force in the past year or so, if those are public in your state. Departments might keep summary data on internal affairs complaints, so ask for the most recent copy of that, too.

3. Identify the power players and engage them.

Engaging law enforcement leaders is essential to understanding policing, and their involvement is key to fixing problems. My access and experience as a white man who works for a news organization may be different than someone else’s experience. It also depends on who you talk to and their openness to criticism. But I think we stand the best chance of a good outcome if we deal with each other respectfully.

Many policing issues are handled at the local, county or state level. Part of your work will involve figuring out who is responsible for the issue you’re concerned about.

“All policing is local,” former Milwaukee police Chief Edward A. Flynn told me. Like many cities, Milwaukee is also experiencing unrest and criticism of the police. Flynn, a well-known law enforcement leader, encouraged conversations between citizens and cops, possibly aided by a neutral third party like a local faith leader.

“The key to changing policing is on the ground level,” he said. He added that it helps for citizens to praise the good work they see from their officers. He encouraged the public to consider crime statistics when scrutinizing police tactics.

I have found that the police themselves are often open to talking to me about the problems in their profession. Many I have talked to feel bad when things go wrong.

How I did it: I’ve been amazed at who is willing to talk to me when I simply take the time to ask. As part of my investigation into police car chases, I talked to a former cop who lost her police officer husband when his vehicle was struck during a high-speed pursuit. I was touched by the way she took hours from her busy life to tell me some of her most painful memories and share her insights as a former cop.

I took my findings to the attorney general, the state’s largest police union and to lawmakers who vowed action. “It appears to me there’s a lot more harm done than good right now,” one of them said about the high-speed incidents.

“If the community has an issue either positive or negative with their law enforcement, then they should definitely have a conversation with the mayor, council and police chief,” said New Jersey Assemblyman Gordon Johnson, a former cop who has participated in community discussion about police issues.

Contact information for law enforcement leaders is often available online. They may regularly attend meetings that are open to the public.

4. Presenting findings in a fair and persuasive manner is a powerful way to spur reform.

Show police leaders the problem that concerns you, using specific examples and quantifying the damage broadly. Show them the harm. Be careful to be fair. Frame the violations by showing how they go against policies or laws or best practices. Back up what you’re saying with the evidence you’ve acquired.

How I did it: To highlight the dangers of police car chases, I introduced readers to Eric Larson, a young father killed when his car was hit by a motorcyclist fleeing police. Then I quantified the harm based on the records I had obtained: “New Jersey police pursuits killed at least 55 people in the past decade and injured more than 2,500.”

Remember that there’s always a different view to your perspective. Integrate it into your presentation if it is legitimate. Acknowledging the counterpoints helps you focus and ask tougher questions. In the car chase story, I made sure to also note incidents in which police chased a suspected killer and men wanted in connection to a shooting. Sometimes police chase violent criminals, but is it worthwhile for cops to chase someone for a traffic violation?

Policing is tough work, and there are times when cops use justified force. Differentiate how the issue you identified deviates from what’s appropriate.

5. Follow up relentlessly until change is made.

Change is incremental and can take years. You will likely have to repeat yourself and persist in your efforts. But if you’ve found an issue of serious public importance — like the use of force incidents we’ve seen lately from the police — there may be ongoing examples you can point to as you make your case to decision-makers.

It may be worthwhile to reach out to local journalists with what you’ve found. News outlets often have a tip line you can call. Or, find a reporter who covers similar issues and call or email them with what you’ve found. I take calls like this frequently and look forward to them. Academics who study criminal justice may also be interested. You can look them up at your local college or university. When reaching out to reporters or academics, keep it brief and focus on the facts.

The wave of protests is hitting home for many people, including in my newsroom in New Jersey. On Monday, police arrested my Asbury Park Press colleague Gustavo Martínez Contreras after he filmed officers tackling two minors to the ground in Asbury Park.

I’m continuing to investigate police accountability problems in New Jersey this year in partnership with ProPublica’s Local Reporting Network. If you have a tip for me, please share it.

If you have questions about applying the suggestions in this column, please email me at aford3@gannettnj.com. And if you find anything interesting as you start to investigate law enforcement practices, please let me know. I may want to follow up or promote your work online.

  • Dad stuns bride with a recording of her accurately describing her future wedding at 4 years old
    Photo credit: CanvaSome weddings are full of surprises.

    Lots of kids imagine their wedding day when they are little in all kinds of creative ways. But few have those childhood imaginings recorded, and even fewer have them unearthed on their actual wedding day.

    But one bride was surprised by just that at her own wedding reception, and in the absolute sweetest way. During the father-daughter dance, as the Beach Boys crooned out “God Only Knows,” suddenly a man’s voice came over the speaker. “Tell me about your wedding,” it said.

    A child’s voice responded: “My wedding is gonna have clowns dancing with the children, and a moon bounce, and face painting…when the brides all change into costumes, they go in the moon bounce.”

    @jordannrose1

    I could not stop crying!! 🥹🤍full backstory: my parents found a video from when I was 4 years old talking shout my future wedding, where I named my childhood friends as my bridesmaids that were in attendance, and said Max would be my husband…. While I didn’t meet Max until college it was kismet!! They edited that clip into our father daughter dance and totally surprised everyone including me!!! ❤️ #fatherdaughterdance #wedding #bride #2026bride #2026wedding @absocialstudio

    ♬ original sound – jordan

    The child was Jordan, the bride, at four years old, and the man’s voice was her dad.

    “Who are the brides gonna be?” preschooler Jordan’s dad asked.

    “The brides are gonna be silly princesses,” Jordan responded. She said they would be named Gracie, Rachel, Kelly (or Ketti?), and Sarah.

    “And what about the princes?” her dad asked. “Who are the princes going to be?”

    “Oh, you mean all the boys?” little Jordan asked. “They’re gonna be silly superheroes!”

    wedding, marriage, flower girl
    Little girl dressed up for a wedding. Photo credit: Canva

    But when Dad asked who they were, no one expected her little voice to cry out, “Max! Max! Max!”

    Max, Jordan’s real-life adult groom, who was listening to all of this, was gobsmacked—as in full-on, wide-eyed, jaw-to-the-floor shocked. Jordan herself was blown away.

    “No way!” Max said. “No way. No way!”

    Jordan wrote the backstory in the TikTok caption: “My parents found a video from when I was 4 years old talking about my future wedding, where I named my childhood friends as my bridesmaids that were in attendance, and said Max would be my husband…. While I didn’t meet Max until college it was kismet!! They edited that clip into our father-daughter dance and totally surprised everyone including me!!!”

    @jordannrose1

    5.2.26 🤍💍🤵🏼👰🏻‍♀️🥂 married my best friend! wedding content by the amazing @absocialstudio #wedding #bride #2026bride #2026wedding #lajolla

    ♬ original sound – jordan

    People loved the clever, creative weaving of the audio into the father-daughter dance. And of course, commenters adored the groom’s stunned reaction:

    “You just KNOW your dad has been planning that since the moment you said ‘Dad, this is Max.’”

    “Just sobbing over a girl who manifested her entire life without knowing it.”

    “This is the most beautiful invisible string story I’ve ever heard of.”

    “The fact your husband was crying before he even heard his name said… a REAL one!! Congratulations!”

    “I am BAWLING RIGHT NOW. literally the definition of ‘in every lifetime.’”

    Of all the uses of childhood videos at a wedding, this one might be the most creative and meaningful yet. Congratulations to the adorable couple, who were so clearly meant for one another.

    You can follow Jordan on TikTok.

  • Family of 7 takes in 82-year-old widower neighbor as their new ‘grandpa’
    Photo credit: via USA Today Paul Callahan, 82, with the Caraballo family.
    ,

    Family of 7 takes in 82-year-old widower neighbor as their new ‘grandpa’

    “You get many chances to talk to people. If you don’t take a chance, you may miss a friend.”

    In 2022, the Caraballo family welcomed a new member: their neighbor from across the street, Paul Callahan, who was 82 at the time. Callahan, a widower, lost his wife prior to the Caraballos moving in. It makes sense their new neighbor was feeling lonely, but a beautiful friendship was on the way. After their initial meeting, Callahan quickly became like a grandfather to the Caraballos, a family of seven, and the story went viral. Various publications and news outlets covered the heartwarming blended family and they were even invited to appear on Good Morning America and The Kelly Clarkson Show.

    South West News Service first reported the whole story, writing that when Sharaine, then 32, and Wilson Caraballo, then 42, moved their family of seven into a new home in Pawtucket, Rhode Island in 2022, they weren’t sure how they’d be received. “Our biggest fear moving into a new neighborhood was, ‘What if our neighbors don’t like us?’ What if, because we have a lot of kids, they make a lot of noise and we come from a big family, so what if there’s any conflict with the neighbors?” Sharaine told USA Today. “We’re the only Black family in our neighborhood.”

    Then their neighbor showed up with a ladder

    But all that fear quickly dissipated when their new neighbor, Callahan, showed up with a ladder and offered to help the family spruce up their new home.

    “He was coming over with tools. He’d bring screwdrivers and teach Wilson how to fix up the garage, and Wilson followed all his advice,” Sharaine told South West News Service. The octogenarian soon became a fixture at the Caraballo house. Now, Callahan stops by nearly every day and can always be found at the family’s cookouts, gatherings, and holidays.

    He’s not the neighbor anymore, he’s family

    Callahan has become a great friend to the family’s children, whom he entertains with stories from his past. “The kids run up to him like that’s their grandfather,” Sharaine said. “Paul is definitely a family member. He’s no longer considered a neighbor.”

    Callahan believes that it’s all about taking the time to be friendly.

    “You get many chances to talk to people. If you don’t take a chance, you may miss a friend,” Callahan said. “It doesn’t hurt to be nice. That’s the other thing, it costs you nothing, but a lot of times, you get a better return.”

    The story went viral, and for good reason

    Sharaine keeps her well-wishers updated on the doings of her family, including Callahan, on her Instagram page. Though she hasn’t posted about Callahan specifically since their mini media storm, she keeps posts about their story and media appearance pinned to the top of her page for all to see.

    This article originally appeared three years ago.

  • An errant pitch hit a Little League player in the head. His response was peak sportsmanship.
    Photo credit: CanvaA viral video from a Little League game has people celebrating good sportsmanship.

    Youth sports have gotten more intensely competitive, to the point where overeager parents and coaches have to regularly be reminded to take it down a notch. So when humanity takes precedence over team rivalries, it’s extra heartwarming.

    And considering how many “kids these days” laments we see coming from older generations, it’s also heartening to see kids showing excellent character qualities when no one directly asked them to.

    A viral video from a Little League baseball game is giving us a nice dose of both—good sportsmanship and basic human kindness from two players from opposing teams.

    As reported by USA Today, Isaiah (Zay) Jarvis, a batter from Oklahoma, took a pitch from Texas East pitcher Kaiden Shelton right to the side of his helmet. It was a hard blow that caused Jarvis to spin around and crumble to the ground, grabbing his head. The replay in slow motion shows that the ball basically just knocked his helmet off, though it was undoubtedly jarring and probably painful as well.

    Jarvis was able to continue playing, but Shelton was shaken up. No matter how fierce the competition, no one wants to be responsible for injuring another person. He was visibly upset on the mound, so Jarvis left first base and approached him.

    Here is what actually happened on that field

    That a kid this age would approach a player who hit him with a ball and comfort him with a hug, especially knowing that all eyes were on him, is just so lovely. Someone raised this young man to put people’s feelings ahead of competitiveness and not worry about what others might think.

    And the fact that the pitcher was so distraught at the possibility of having hurt someone is also so sweet. This was a moment that showed the true character of both of these boys, and both of them exemplified caring and compassion.

    The internet was moved to tears

    People praised the boys’ empathy and humanity.

    Both of those boys are what you want your kids to aspire to,” wrote one commenter. “One willing to forgive and knows it wasn’t intentional and the other showing remorse and sorrow. I love it!!”

    Thankfully, these kids aren’t some one-off anomaly. We see examples of kindness and empathy all the time in sports. Despite how fierce competition can get, enjoyment of the game and the self-improvement on all levels that comes with playing is what it’s all about, and many coaches and parents strive to make sure that their kids are learning all of those lessons.

    This video demonstrates even more than simple respect for an opponent. It shows that this kid recognized his opponent’s humanity first and foremost. He didn’t just say, “It’s no problem.” He recognized that the pitcher had feelings of his own and wanted to make surehe was okay. That’s a whole other level of sportsmanship to strive for, one that takes nothing away from strong competition and doing your best to win.

    This went beyond good sportsmanship

    The moment has had a lasting impact on both boys. In a follow-up by ESPN, Jarvis reflected, “I don’t think it’s changed me, but it’s changed my lifestyle. People know me, and so I always need to be doing the right thing.” The two became friends, and their story is now held up as a symbol of what youth sports should look like.

    Many adults could even learn from the emotionally intelligent and empathetic interaction of these two kids. Good sportsmanship all around. Love to see it. Big kudos to these kiddos and whoever raised them.

    This article originally appeared four years ago. It has been updated.

  • The empowering advice Eleanor Roosevelt shared for anyone struggling with self-worth and confidence
    Photo credit: WikipediaEleanor Roosevelt shared her insights on building self-worth and confidence.

    Eleanor Roosevelt lived a one-of-a-kind life that included her role as first lady of the United States. Born in 1884, she became a prominent figure in American politics and culture.

    She was also a prolific writer and penned a syndicated newspaper column called “My Day” six days a week from 1935 until her death in 1962.

    In it, she shared the wisdom and advice she had gathered throughout her life. In one column from 1943, Roosevelt offered her confidence-building advice:

    “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

    Roosevelt’s insightful wisdom centers on separating self-worth from the opinions and perceptions of others and instead turning inward to find value and confidence. Her advice came years after surviving a traumatic childhood and undergoing her own self-discovery.

    Roosevelt’s personal struggle with confidence

    Roosevelt had a tumultuous upbringing. Her mother died of diphtheria when she was only eight years old, and less than two years later, her father died due to depression and alcoholism. She was orphaned by age 10, and Roosevelt’s grandmother, Mary Hall, became her guardian.

    Roosevelt also grew up feeling self-conscious about her appearance and serious demeanor, according to a short biography published by The George Washington University’s Eleanor Roosevelt Papers Project.

    She was given many nicknames, including “Granny,” “very plain,” and “old-fashioned.” Roosevelt once wrote, “I was a solemn child without beauty. I seemed like a little old woman entirely lacking in the spontaneous joy and mirth of youth.”

    Despite these challenges, Roosevelt found her sense of worth and confidence through education. Her grandmother sent her overseas in 1899, when she was 15, to attend Allenswood Academy in London. It was there that she discovered her gift for forming friendships and her love of learning.

    In her autobiography, Roosevelt wrote that she developed “confidence and independence,” adding that she was “totally without fear in this new phase of my life.”

    Roosevelt also wrote about battling people-pleasing. “I was always afraid of something: of the dark, of displeasing people, of failure. Anything I accomplished had to be done across a barrier of fear,” she wrote.

    @jayshetty

    What idea are you discussing today? Elenor Roosvelt’s quote is worth remembering

    ♬ original sound – Jay Shetty

    Tips for building self-worth and confidence

    Building confidence and self-worth is a difficult process that may require intentional effort. Zack Goldman, a psychotherapist and founder of Solid Ground Psychotherapy, shares three helpful tips for anyone struggling with feelings of inferiority:

    Stop treating confidence like a prerequisite for action

    Goldman explains that one of the biggest misconceptions about confidence is that people think they need to feel confident before doing something difficult.

    “In reality, confidence is usually built afterward through repeated experiences of taking action despite discomfort,” he told Upworthy. “Start with small, manageable risks because every time you prove to yourself that you can tolerate uncertainty, rejection, or imperfection, yourself trust grows.”

    Pay attention to how you speak to yourself during difficult moments

    “Many people unknowingly reinforce low self-worth through constant self-criticism, especially when they make mistakes or feel emotionally overwhelmed,” Goldman said.

    He explains that instead of asking, “What’s wrong with me?” try asking, “What would I say to someone I care about in this situation?”

    “Learning to respond to yourself with more fairness and compassion helps create a more stable sense of worth that is not dependent on constant achievement or external validation,” he added.

    Build a life that reflects your values, not just other people’s expectations

    According to Goldman, people often lose confidence when they spend too much time trying to meet standards that do not actually align with who they are.

    “Self-worth becomes much stronger when your decisions, relationships, and goals reflect your own values rather than approval seeking,” he said. “Even small choices that move you toward a more authentic version of yourself can create a deeper sense of confidence and internal stability over time.”

  • 20 years ago his BBC interview became a viral comedy hit. Now, he’s sharing his secret to staying calm.
    Photo credit: BBC News/YouTubeGuy Goma realizing he’s in the wrong interview, circa 2006.

    Since his accidental 15 minutes of fame in 2006, Guy Goma has been the epitome of keeping calm under pressure.

    The video—in which Goma showed up for a job interview at the BBC and was mistaken for, quite literally, another Guy (technology journalist Guy Kewney)—has gone viral time and time again, thanks in no small part to how well Goma handled the situation after being thrust into a live on-air interview.

    Now, two decades after the wholesome snafu, Goma has decided to impart some wisdom about turning a potentially catastrophic moment into one of pure grace.

    To be fair, Goma admits he wasn’t stoic the entire time

    Speaking to This Morning, Goma said his initial thoughts were, “God help me. I’m lost completely.”

    However, he remembered the words of his mother, who taught him to quietly fix a problem without embarrassing anyone.

    “My mom always says to us, ‘If you notice something, your brother made a mistake anywhere, correct the mistake first before talking to the person,’” he said.

    Not wanting to make anyone else feel uncomfortable, Goma held onto his composure. That was all the fuel he needed to carry on, answering the questions placed before him with such admirable self-possession that viewers still revisit the clip time and time again. Sure, it’s partly for a good laugh, but also because Goma’s chutzpah is undeniably inspiring.

    The hidden Zen wisdom behind all this

    Nearly all of us have experienced a situation where we felt unprepared, overwhelmed, or suddenly put on the spot (if you haven’t, your time is coming). Goma’s response offers a blueprint for surviving those moments with dignity intact. In similarly anxiety-inducing situations, we can direct our attention outside ourselves and aim to simply be of service in whatever way we can muster in the moment, rather than laser-focusing on what we’re experiencing internally. When that happens—when we forego our concept of “I,” as Buddhists say—what once felt insurmountable often suddenly shrinks to its proper size.

    There’s also something to be said for the fact that Goma never appeared bitter about the misunderstanding that made him Internet-famous. Even not getting the job he originally came to interview for, which he shared was heartbreaking at the time, didn’t ultimately defeat his spirit. Over the years, he has retained his humor and warmth, which has only deepened people’s affection for him.

    Life after becoming Internet-famous

    According to Newstalk, Goma now works with people who have learning disabilities. It might not be the job he planned for all those years ago, but it sounds like he’s found work with purpose nonetheless. He also teamed up with Elliott Gotkine, the BBC producer who put him on the air, to release their story in book form as The Wrong Guy: The Inside Story of TV’s Greatest Cock-Up.

    Though we may never find ourselves accidentally talking shop on live television, may we all handle our own unexpected blunders with that same humility and humor. Who’s to say what surprising blessings might come as a result?

  • A trans man beautifully harmonizes to the song ‘Kiss Me’ alongside a 2018 clip of himself
    Photo credit: Dylan HollowayDylan Holloway shares a side-by-side clip with his former self before transitioning.

    British singer-songwriter Dylan Holloway, who performs as Dylan and the Moon, has been wowing audiences with his voice for quite some time. But what makes Holloway especially unique is that he also charmed crowds before identifying as male. While Holloway had long wrestled with his gender identity, he transitioned from female to male during the COVID-19 pandemic. While some might say they never look back, Holloway chooses to look back with love and gratitude for his former self.

    In a recent clip posted to Holloway’s Instagram page, he shows his followers a split screen. On the left is Dylan presenting as female, with blonde curls and soprano notes. That side is labeled “2018.” On the right is modern-day Dylan, now presenting as male, shirtless and tattooed, marked “2026.” To the song “Kiss Me,” he harmonizes with his former self, and it’s absolutely pitch-perfect.

    “A duet with my past self”

    At the top of the clip, he writes, “Singing with my past self…trans duet.” Holloway adds in the comments:

    “A duet with my past self. I make these videos because it brings me joy to embrace my entire journey & it helps me spread love to others who may wish to do the same… I’m proud of who I am & the unique art I can make because of it … whoever you are, whatever your journey, you are wonderful & deserve love for your whole self too.”

    Fans in the comment section were equally loving and seemingly in awe:

    “You were and are a beautiful person, with a lot of charisma, musically and a beautiful voice. In both interpretations. Gifted! I’m impressed.”

    “I see a talented musician who is proud of his story and who loves himself, as he should.”

    Sixpence None the Richer

    As for the song? The year was 1998. The band Sixpence None the Richer had taken American radio stations by storm with their sweet, melodic single “Kiss Me” from their self-titled album, released a year earlier. Its lyrics are pretty straightforward, though some could call them a tad bossy. The singer would like a gentleman to kiss her “behind the bearded barley. Nightly, behind the green, green grass. Swing, swing. Swing the spinning step. You’ll wear those shoes and I will wear that dress.” Holloway nails every note.

    @dylanandthemoon

    The X Factor (lol) 11 years & 1 transition later 🏳️‍⚧️ 😂 #xfactor #transition #transgender #transman before and after

    ♬ original sound – DylanAndTheMoon

    Obvious X Factor

    Back in 2012, Holloway became a sensation while competing on Britain’s The X Factor, where he ended up as a finalist in a band called MK1. More recently, he compiled clips from the show featuring his former self singing beautifully then and just as purely now as a man.

    In an interview with DIVA Magazine, Holloway described his time on the show:

    “MK1 ended up at the finals on national television, which was such a turning point in my life. Until then I had just been a little androgynous kid from Newquay with a secret inside me, and now I was a rapper in an urban band on telly. But everyone knew me as someone I wasn’t, and I felt like a caricature of myself. Eventually, after a few years, these feelings bubbled to the surface and I couldn’t continue to be this person everyone thought I was, so I drifted and started releasing my own music under the name Lots Holloway.”

    Compassion and love

    When asked what it’s like singing with his former self, Holloway seemed to feel at peace:

    “It’s actually such a wonderful experience to look at them now. I think a lot of transgender people find there’s a pressure, whether they put that on themselves or it is external pressure, to eliminate the person you once were when you become someone new. Now I’m the person I am today, I look back at old footage of myself with this new compassion and love. I wouldn’t be here right now if it wasn’t for that brave, resilient, and bold soul that was brave enough to come out.”

    Alongside his career as a musician, Holloway also speaks professionally about mental health advocacy and LGBTQ rights. On the Raise the Bar website, where he is listed as one of its motivational speakers, the organization shares the importance of these side-by-side videos: “In posting these videos, he spreads the message that it is okay to accept your old self, as it is all part of the journey that makes you who you are now.”

    Upworthy spoke with Holloway, who shared how he feels about transitioning and music in general.

    “For awhile, I thought I had to leave that version of myself behind. But over time, I realised there was something really beautiful about letting both versions of me exist together,” he said. “So instead of erasing my past, I started creating duets with old vocal recordings and videos I had. Almost like having a conversation across time with younger me. So healing. How many people ever have that opportunity? I want other people to know it’s okay to embrace who you are – the whole story.”

    He says his favorite duet so far is “Yellow” by Coldplay.

    “This song came out when I was growing up and confused about myself,” he said. “I recorded it on a rooftop in 2018. Then went back to the same place in 2026 to film again, totally free and transitioned. And the merging of those two people together, to me, is beautiful. I love how the lyrics mean something totally different in this context. ‘Your skin and bones turn into something beautiful. I swam across. I jumped across for you. You know I love you so.’ All of it.”

    He added, “My dream is that Coldplay will see it and see how much their song helped heal me. And one day, we will play it together with the old version of me projected behind us to sing it too. In a huge stadium, of course. I want to spread the message of acceptance and love as far as we can.”

    “Traditional songwriting” is where he draws most of his influence: “People who tell stories. People who write to move others. Dolly Parton, David Bowie, Coldplay, Paul Simon, Tracy Chapman. Iconic.”

    He plans to keep telling those stories.

    “I’m a totally independent artist, and this year, I’m creating an album in public and allowing my fans to make decisions along the way,” he said. “I make one bit of content a day and release one song a month. Eventually, it will all come together into an album. And my fans will know they helped bring it to life. So everyone is welcome to come and get involved!”

    Holloway is also releasing a documentary later this year that shares more of his story. “It shows an up close and personal journey of my transition from the lens of being a singer who risked losing their voice,” he said.

  • Teen patients at St. Jude celebrate special prom night with glam squads and a red carpet
    Photo credit: Courtesy of St. Jude Children’s Research HospitalSt. Jude Children's Research Hospital patients celebrate prom night.
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    Teen patients at St. Jude celebrate special prom night with glam squads and a red carpet

    “It gives us all a hope to just be normal and to just have an amazing time.”

    Prom season is officially here, and the teens receiving care at St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital dressed to the nines for the 2026 St. Jude Teen Formal. On May 1, more than 60 teen patients took part in a night of dancing, limo rides, and more at the Domino’s Event Center on the hospital’s campus in Memphis, Tennessee.

    The night had a special theme: On Cloud 9. It was inspired by the hospital’s partner, country singer Megan Moroney, who recently released a new album titled Cloud 9.

    “It gives us all a hope to just be normal and to just have an amazing time,” attendee and St. Jude patient Presli told Upworthy.

    St Jude Children’s Research Hospital patients walk the red carpet for the the annual Teen Formal on Friday, May 1, 2026 in Memphis, Tenn. St. Jude helps their patient enjoy milestones such as the end of the school year tradition for high school students.

    Patients get glammed up

    Presli was one of many young women who had the opportunity to have their hair and makeup done for the event thanks to St. Jude volunteers. Attendees were also provided with wardrobes for the evening.

    “It’s just overwhelming seeing her coming out of that limo and walking that red carpet,” Presli’s mom told Upworthy. “She had so much confidence.”

    St Jude Children’s Research Hospital patients walk the red carpet for the the annual Teen Formal on Friday, May 1, 2026 in Memphis, Tenn. St. Jude helps their patient enjoy milestones such as the end of the school year tradition for high school students.

    Guests invited by patients also got the star treatment. Moroney surprised attendees as they got ready with a special video dedicated to them, honoring their bravery and encouraging them to live it up.

    No prom experience would be complete without a limo ride, and attendees got to roll up to the event in style. Once they arrived, a red carpet welcomed them alongside cheering volunteers.

    St Jude Children’s Research Hospital patients walk the red carpet for the the annual Teen Formal on Friday, May 1, 2026 in Memphis, Tenn. St. Jude helps their patient enjoy milestones such as the end of the school year tradition for high school students.

    Rolling out the red carpet

    The teens each had their time to shine as they strolled down the red carpet. It was also a moment that reminded attendee Dalton not to lose hope during his health battle.

    “No matter what you’re going through there’s always a way for you to push through,” Dalton told Upworthy.

    St Jude Children’s Research Hospital patients walk the red carpet for the the annual Teen Formal on Friday, May 1, 2026 in Memphis, Tenn. St. Jude helps their patient enjoy milestones such as the end of the school year tradition for high school students.

    For the teens’ families, the annual event is also a reminder of normalcy.

    “To me, it represents hope,” Dalton’s mom told Upworthy. “It’s something that we can look forward to and know that each year they can forget about all their worries. They can just be children.”

    St Jude Children’s Research Hospital patients walk the red carpet for the the annual Teen Formal on Friday, May 1, 2026 in Memphis, Tenn. St. Jude helps their patient enjoy milestones such as the end of the school year tradition for high school students.

    Inside the venue, they stepped into a “Cloud 9” dream. Cloud-themed decor covered the entire space, complete with cotton-trimmed porticos and metallic streamers. Guests first enjoyed a sit-down dinner.

    @popculturememphis

    On Cloud 9 at @St. Jude teen prom! ☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️ #popculturememphis #stjude #memphis #prom #balloons

    ♬ drop dead – Olivia Rodrigo

    Afterwards, it was time to bust a move under a cloud-covered dance floor. Hits spun from the DJ, and the teens danced all night. The event’s coordinator, Kenny, shared some behind-the-scenes looks at the event on TikTok:

    She explained that each attendee also got to visit a gifting suite, where they could personalize a bird keychain with their name. Once finished, they could take the keychain over to a wall where they were able to hang it on a dove that lifted it to the “sky” before returning with a swag bag full of goodies.

    “I wanted to make the whole night a really memorable experience for our teens,” she shared in the video. “And I think they all loved it!”

  • 8-year-old prevents flight from being diverted by soothing unruly passenger with ‘Dance Monkey’ song
    Photo credit: The Rose family courtesy of BelfastLivePhoenix Rose, 8, is a great soccer player and plane-passenger soother.
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    8-year-old prevents flight from being diverted by soothing unruly passenger with ‘Dance Monkey’ song

    He sang to and talked down an unruly passenger for three and a half hours.

    Being on a plane can be a nuisance on its own, but when there is an unruly passenger, it goes from an annoyance to a potential danger. On a Jet2 flight, a passenger was so belligerently drunk and rude to the staff that the plane was going to be diverted. Then hope arrived in the form of an eight-year-old soccer fan.

    Phoenix Rose and his father were cutting their vacation in Turkey short. They had to catch a flight home to Manchester due to a family emergency. During the flight, a passenger had too much to drink before boarding. She even had her open bottle of whiskey confiscated. This caused the irate passenger to disrupt the flight, shouting and swearing at the flight attendants. The passenger became so unruly that the flight attendants made an announcement: The flight would be diverted to remove her from the plane.

    And a child would lead them

    Phoenix was desperate to get home to deal with his family emergency. He didn’t want the flight to be diverted and cause a delay. On a whim, he asked a flight attendant if he could sit next to the angry passenger. He asked for only 30 seconds.

    The flight attendants gave Phoenix a chance. They switched his seat to one next to the unruly passenger. And it worked.

    “He just took all the control,” James, Phoenix’s father, told BelfastLive. “Phoenix, he got his cards out, he started singing to her this Dance Monkey song.”

    “She’s screaming, she’s shouting, she’s still being irate. And he starts singing to her, he starts talking about his football to her, talking about her family, asking her about her kids,” James told BBC News. “I’m sort of sat there in the end and I’m thinking to myself, thank god that Phoenix is with me because if he wasn’t, I don’t think I would have been able to handle it.”

    The young master of de-escalation

    Knowingly or instinctively, Phoenix practiced effective de-escalation techniques while talking to the passenger. This included finding common ground, listening to her talk about her family, and using several other strategies.

    Phoenix even calmly reminded her of the consequences. He told the passenger that she could be arrested if she couldn’t calm down, but quickly encouraged her to talk about her kids.

    For three and a half hours, Phoenix chatted with the passenger. They discussed his love of soccer, his YouTube channel, and their families. Phoenix also showed her his trading cards of Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo. An eight-year-old accomplished what a plane full of adults struggled to do.

    After the plane landed at its destination, the pilot and flight attendants thanked Phoenix for preventing a forced flight diversion. That would have been costly for both the airline and the passengers in terms of time and money. The passenger was taken into custody by authorities.

    A spokesperson for Jet2 thanked Phoenix and rewarded him and his dad with free flight vouchers.

    A little bit of kindness and the wisdom of a young kid were all it took to ease an intense and volatile situation.

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