5 ways everyday citizens can start holding police departments accountable

This article first appeared on ProPublica. You can read it here. The death of George Floyd at the hands of police in Minneapolis has drawn historic levels of interest in police misconduct and drawn condemnation from law enforcement leaders nationwide. As a reporter covering law enforcement for the Asbury Park Press in New Jersey, and…

Andrew Ford

Jul 21, 2020

Array – Photo credit: assets.rebelmouse.io

This article first appeared on ProPublica. You can read it here.

The death of George Floyd at the hands of police in Minneapolis has drawn historic levels of interest in police misconduct and drawn condemnation from law enforcement leaders nationwide.

As a reporter covering law enforcement for the Asbury Park Press in New Jersey, and now in partnership with ProPublica’s Local Reporting Network, I use investigative reporting techniques to strengthen police accountability. Other journalists do the same. But, in truth, any citizen can apply the same methods to ensure the law enforcement system they’re funding is serving them well.

Police culture can be insular and tough to penetrate. But I’ve been surprised by how often it’s possible, though time consuming, to expose important issues by requesting and examining records and data from police departments and other government agencies and engaging citizens and key leaders. So here are five techniques concerned citizens, journalists and policymakers can use to examine police conduct in their communities.

1. Understand the policies and laws that govern police conduct.

If you’re alarmed by what you saw in Minneapolis, or other recent incidents of apparent police misconduct, the first step is to find out if the agency in question has a written policy on the use of force. Does the policy dictate when officers should or shouldn’t use force? What tactics are they allowed to use? Is there any rule against choking a suspect?

It’s important to know if the officers involved were following the policies and procedures that are supposed to guide their behavior. Police actions that strike an onlooker as inappropriate may actually be within a department’s rules. It’s possible the rules themselves are inconsistent with best practices elsewhere.

Ask the department for its policies on the practices that concern you, like restraining suspects or the use of pepper spray or Tasers. You may also need to request rules set by a county or state authority. Ask for written copies. You may be required to file a formal public records request, which I will describe below. And if there is no existing written policy, that might be something worth questioning itself.

If you’re having trouble understanding a policy, try running it by an attorney, academic, elected official or a journalist in your community.

How I did it: I did a deep dive into policies about drug testing after a police captain was killed in a car crash in 2016, and I exposed that he was drunk and on drugs at the time. I spoke to his chief and learned their department didn’t have a policy for random drug testing. I wondered why that was the case and looked to the state attorney general’s office, which sets many police rules. The rules allowed departments to choose whether they wanted to do random testing, and my reporting identified more than 100 that did not. After our story, the state attorney general mandated random drug testing for cops across the state.

2. You are entitled to public records that can show whether rules are being followed. Get them.

Your tax dollars pay for just about everything a police department does, which includes generating tons of reports, dispatch logs, video recordings and data about what officers do every day. Any citizen is entitled to see those public records to understand how the government works.

The agency may say the public records law does not allow you to have access to some documents — information about confidential informants and medical records, for example. The laws that dictate what’s considered public vary by state, so check out the national guide by the Reporters Committee for Freedom of the Press. Information the agency considers off limits may also be redacted, and it may take time to get a response.

Even with the hassles and limitations, public records laws are empowering and I’ve been surprised by how much I can obtain. My policy is always to ask and make a records clerk explain why I can’t have taxpayer-funded records. Follow up to ensure important requests aren’t lost or ignored. Assume you should be able to see everything. Your state’s public records law may even include a presumption that records are open and exemptions are an exception. You may run into roadblocks that you can’t overcome on your own. In some cases, journalism organizations have had to sue to obtain public records. Your budget may not allow for an attorney, but some states have mediators that you can go to if you think your request is being wrongly denied.

It’s striking how much information the government collects but then does not review. So you might be the first person to ask for a particular body of records and put them together to identify an important trend which you can share with leaders who weren’t paying attention to the issue. Your local journalists may also be very interested in the information you have gathered.

Sometimes it’s hard to even know which records exist. That’s where documents commonly known as records retention schedules come in handy. Government agencies use these to track which records they keep and how long they hold onto them. Use the schedules to help you see what you might be able to obtain. These are available all over the country. Just for fun, I looked up the city of Los Angeles — they call them records disposition schedules and found them for agencies ranging from the Police Department to the zoo. The agency of interest to you might use a different name for the document, so call them and ask if they have a written guide that shows which records they maintain and for how long.

How I did it: I started investigating police car chases after I saw the government keeps summaries of those incidents, including how many people are arrested or injured. I saw I could add up those figures and see if the benefits of the chases outweighed the risks and harm. I discovered that chases in recent years usually didn’t end with an arrest, and that lots of people get hurt, including cops and bystanders.

If you’re interested in scrutinizing the type of misconduct we saw in Minneapolis, you could request use of force reports. New Jersey made those public a few years ago, and Newark Star-Ledger journalists used them to great effect. ProPublica has that data available here for a fee.

If I were investigating a case of violence by the police I’d ask for:

The use of force reports filed by the officers involved.
Related incident reports.
Computer-assisted dispatch reports.
911 phone call recordings.
Body-worn and vehicle-mounted camera recordings.

I might also request policies that dictate how an agency handles complaints against officers. Some states consider substantiated complaints against individual officers to be public records, so you could request them, depending on where you live. WNYC has a helpful breakdown of where that information is public. If you’re looking for video from police body cameras, the Reporters Committee has a guide that shows the places where those are considered public. If you want to obtain recordings of 911 calls, they have a guide for those, too.

You could also be more general and ask the relevant department for substantiated internal affairs complaints alleging excessive force in the past year or so, if those are public in your state. Departments might keep summary data on internal affairs complaints, so ask for the most recent copy of that, too.

3. Identify the power players and engage them.

Engaging law enforcement leaders is essential to understanding policing, and their involvement is key to fixing problems. My access and experience as a white man who works for a news organization may be different than someone else’s experience. It also depends on who you talk to and their openness to criticism. But I think we stand the best chance of a good outcome if we deal with each other respectfully.

Many policing issues are handled at the local, county or state level. Part of your work will involve figuring out who is responsible for the issue you’re concerned about.

“All policing is local,” former Milwaukee police Chief Edward A. Flynn told me. Like many cities, Milwaukee is also experiencing unrest and criticism of the police. Flynn, a well-known law enforcement leader, encouraged conversations between citizens and cops, possibly aided by a neutral third party like a local faith leader.

“The key to changing policing is on the ground level,” he said. He added that it helps for citizens to praise the good work they see from their officers. He encouraged the public to consider crime statistics when scrutinizing police tactics.

I have found that the police themselves are often open to talking to me about the problems in their profession. Many I have talked to feel bad when things go wrong.

How I did it: I’ve been amazed at who is willing to talk to me when I simply take the time to ask. As part of my investigation into police car chases, I talked to a former cop who lost her police officer husband when his vehicle was struck during a high-speed pursuit. I was touched by the way she took hours from her busy life to tell me some of her most painful memories and share her insights as a former cop.

I took my findings to the attorney general, the state’s largest police union and to lawmakers who vowed action. “It appears to me there’s a lot more harm done than good right now,” one of them said about the high-speed incidents.

“If the community has an issue either positive or negative with their law enforcement, then they should definitely have a conversation with the mayor, council and police chief,” said New Jersey Assemblyman Gordon Johnson, a former cop who has participated in community discussion about police issues.

Contact information for law enforcement leaders is often available online. They may regularly attend meetings that are open to the public.

4. Presenting findings in a fair and persuasive manner is a powerful way to spur reform.

Show police leaders the problem that concerns you, using specific examples and quantifying the damage broadly. Show them the harm. Be careful to be fair. Frame the violations by showing how they go against policies or laws or best practices. Back up what you’re saying with the evidence you’ve acquired.

How I did it: To highlight the dangers of police car chases, I introduced readers to Eric Larson, a young father killed when his car was hit by a motorcyclist fleeing police. Then I quantified the harm based on the records I had obtained: “New Jersey police pursuits killed at least 55 people in the past decade and injured more than 2,500.”

Remember that there’s always a different view to your perspective. Integrate it into your presentation if it is legitimate. Acknowledging the counterpoints helps you focus and ask tougher questions. In the car chase story, I made sure to also note incidents in which police chased a suspected killer and men wanted in connection to a shooting. Sometimes police chase violent criminals, but is it worthwhile for cops to chase someone for a traffic violation?

Policing is tough work, and there are times when cops use justified force. Differentiate how the issue you identified deviates from what’s appropriate.

5. Follow up relentlessly until change is made.

Change is incremental and can take years. You will likely have to repeat yourself and persist in your efforts. But if you’ve found an issue of serious public importance — like the use of force incidents we’ve seen lately from the police — there may be ongoing examples you can point to as you make your case to decision-makers.

It may be worthwhile to reach out to local journalists with what you’ve found. News outlets often have a tip line you can call. Or, find a reporter who covers similar issues and call or email them with what you’ve found. I take calls like this frequently and look forward to them. Academics who study criminal justice may also be interested. You can look them up at your local college or university. When reaching out to reporters or academics, keep it brief and focus on the facts.

The wave of protests is hitting home for many people, including in my newsroom in New Jersey. On Monday, police arrested my Asbury Park Press colleague Gustavo Martínez Contreras after he filmed officers tackling two minors to the ground in Asbury Park.

I’m continuing to investigate police accountability problems in New Jersey this year in partnership with ProPublica’s Local Reporting Network. If you have a tip for me, please share it.

If you have questions about applying the suggestions in this column, please email me at aford3@gannettnj.com. And if you find anything interesting as you start to investigate law enforcement practices, please let me know. I may want to follow up or promote your work online.

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Youth-led party for community engagement, MEDEA, Tanzania Captured by James Roh for Pura

Culture, Education, Empowered Women, Equality, Family, Identity, Modern Families

The next generation of female leaders has arrived. Here’s how they’re making sure they (and every girl) get a chance to learn.

Malala Fund and their local partners, with support from Pura, help girls find their voice. The result: greater access to education and a better world.

Sarah Watts

3/8/2026

Music, community and joy drive real change

In a small village in Pwani, a district on Tanzania’s coast, a massive dance party is coming to a close. For the past two hours, locals have paraded through the village streets, singing and beating ngombe drums; now, in a large clearing, a woman named Sheilla motions for everyone to sit facing a large projector screen. A film premiere is about to begin.

It’s an unusual way to kick off a film about gender bias, inequality, early marriage, and other barriers that prevent girls from accessing education in Tanzania. But in Pwani and beyond, local organizations supported by Malala Fund and funded by Pura are finding creative, culturally relevant ways like this one to capture people’s interest.

The film ends and Sheilla, the Communications and Partnership Lead for Media for Development and Advocacy (MEDEA), stands in front of the crowd once again, asking the audience to reflect: What did you think about the film? How did it relate to your own experience? What can we learn?

Sheilla explains that, once the community sees the film, “It brings out conversations within themselves, reflective conversations.” The resonance and immediate action create a ripple effect of change.

MEDEA Screening Audience in Tanzania. Captured by James Roh for Pura

Across Tanzania, gender-based violence often forces adolescent girls out of the classroom. This and other barriers — including child marriage, poverty, conflict, and discrimination — prevent girls from completing their education around the world.

Sheilla and her team are using film and radio programs to address the challenges girls face in their communities. MEDEA’s ultimate goal is to affirm education as a fundamental right for everyone, and to ensure that every member of a community understands how girls’ education contributes to a stronger whole and how to be an ally for their sisters, daughters, granddaughters, friends, nieces, and girlfriends.

Sheilla’s story is one of many that inspired Heart on Fire, a new fragrance from the Pura x Malala Fund Collection that blends the warm, earthy spices of Tanzania with a playful, joyful twist. Here’s how Pura is using scent as a tool to connect the world and inspire action.

A partnership focused on local impact, on a global mission

Pura, a fragrance company that recognizes education as both freedom and a human right, has partnered with Malala Fund since 2022. In order to defend every girl’s right to access and complete 12 years of education, Malala Fund partners with local organizations in countries where the educational barriers are the greatest. They invest in locally-led solutions because they know that those who are closest to the problems are best equipped to solve and build durable solutions, like MEDEA, which works with communities to challenge discrimination against girls and change beliefs about their education.

But local initiatives can thrive and scale more powerfully with global support, which is why Pura is using their own superpower, the power of scent, to connect people around the world with the women and girls in these local communities.

The Pura x Malala Fund Collection incorporates ingredients naturally found in Tanzania, Nigeria, Pakistan, and Brazil: countries where Malala Fund operates to address systemic education barriers. Eight percent of net revenue from the Pura x Malala Fund Collection will be donated to Malala Fund directly, but beyond financial support, the Collection is also a love letter to each unique community, blending notes like lemon, jasmine, cedarwood, and clove to transport people, ignite their senses, and help them draw inspiration and hope from the global movement for girls’ education. Through scent, people can connect to the courage, joy, and tenacity of girls and local leaders, all while uniting in a shared commitment to education: the belief that supporting girls’ rights in one community benefits all of us, everywhere.

You’ve already met Sheilla. Now see how Naiara and Mama Habiba are building unique solutions to ensure every girl can learn freely and dare to dream.

Naiara Leite is reimagining what’s possible in Brazil

Julia with Odara in Brazil. Captured by Luisa Dorr for Pura

In Brazil, where pear trees and coconut plantations cover the Northeastern Coast, girls like ten-year-old Julia experience a different kind of educational barrier than girls in Tanzania. Too often, racial discrimination contributes to high dropout rates among Black, quilombola and Indigenous girls in the country.

“In the logic of Brazilian society, Black people don’t need to study,” says Naiara Leite, Executive Coordinator of Odara, a women-led organization and Malala Fund partner. Bahia, the state where Odara is based, was once one of the largest slave-receiving territories in the Americas, and because of that history, deeply-ingrained, anti-Black prejudice is still widespread. “Our role and the image constructed around us is one of manual labor,” Naiara says.

But education can change that. In 2020, with assistance from a Malala Fund grant, Odara launched its first initiative for improving school completion rates among Black, quilombola, and Indigenous girls: “Ayomidê Odara”. The young girls mentored under the program, including Julia, are known as the Ayomidês. And like the Pura x Malala Fund Collection’s Brazil: Breath of Courage scent, the Ayomidês are fierce, determined, and bursting with energy.

Ayomidês with Odara in Brazil. Captured by Luisa Dorr for Pura

Ayomidês take part in weekly educational sessions where they explore subjects like education and ethnic-racial relations. The girls are encouraged to find their own voices by producing Instagram lives, social media videos, and by participating in public panels. Already, the Ayomidês are rewriting the narrative on what’s possible for Afro-Brazilian girls to achieve. One of the earliest Ayomidês, a young woman named Debora, is now a communications intern. Another former Ayomidê, Francine, works at UNICEF, helping train the next generation of adolescent leaders. And Julia has already set her sights on becoming a math teacher or a model.

“These are generations of Black women who did not have access to a school,” Naiara says. “These are generations of Black women robbed daily of their dreams. And we’re telling them that they could be the generation in their family to write a new story.”

Mama Habiba is reframing the conversation in Nigeria

Centre for Girls' Education, Nigeria. Captured by James Roh for Pura

In Mama Habiba’s home country of Nigeria, the scents of starfruit, ylang ylang and pineapple, all incorporated into the Pura x Malala Collection’s “Nigeria: Hope for Tomorrow,” can be found throughout the vibrant markets. Like these native scents, Mama Habiba says that the Nigerian girls are also bright and passionate, but too often they are forced to leave school long before their potential fully blooms.

“Some of these schools are very far, and there is an issue of quality, too,” Mama Habiba says. “Most parents find out when their children are in school, the girls are not learning. So why allow them to continue?”

When girls drop out of secondary school, marriage is often the alternative. In Nigeria, one in three girls is married before the age of 18. When this happens, girls are unable to fulfill their potential, and their families and communities lose out on the social, health and economic benefits.

Completing secondary school delays marriage, and according to UNESCO, educated girls become women who raise healthier children, lift their families out of poverty and contribute to more peaceful, resilient communities.

Centre for Girls’ Education, Nigeria. Captured by James Roh for Pura

To encourage young girls to stay in school, the Centre for Girls’ Education, a nonprofit in Nigeria founded by Mama Habiba and supported by Malala Fund and Pura, has pioneered an initiative that’s similar to the Ayomidê workshops in Brazil: safe spaces. Here, girls meet regularly to learn literacy, numeracy, and other issues like reproductive health. These safe spaces also provide an opportunity for the girls to role-play and learn to advocate for themselves, develop their self-image, and practice conversations with others about their values, education being one of them. In safe spaces, Mama Habiba says, girls start to understand “who she is, and that she is a girl who has value. She has the right to negotiate with her parents on what she really feels or wants.”

“When girls are educated, they can unlock so many opportunities,” Mama Habiba says. “It will help the economy of the country. It will boost so many opportunities for the country. If they are given the opportunity, I think the sky is not the limit. It is the starting point for every girl.”

From parades, film screenings to safe spaces and educational programs, girls and local leaders are working hard to strengthen the quality, safety and accessibility of education and overcome systemic challenges. They are encouraging courageous behavior and reminding us all that education is freedom.

Experience the Pura x Malala Fund Collection here, and connect with the stories of real girls leading change across the globe.

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People are putting peanuts into their Coke. – Photo credit: Canva

Culture, Wholesome

‘Farmer’s Coke,’ a Southern U.S. snack from a bygone era, is now gaining traction in Japan

“You’re generating umami in real time inside the glass.”

Annie Reneau

4/4/2026

Have you ever seen someone pour a snack pack of peanuts into a bottle of Coca-Cola? If so, you may have memories of relatives from the Southern United States. If not, you may be wondering why on Earth someone would do such a thing.

An X user from Japan shared a photo of a glass with peanuts floating atop what appears to be cola, writing (auto-translated from Japanese):

“About 30 years ago, I read in a Haruki Murakami essay that in America, it’s popular to drink cola with peanuts in it. I was like, ‘Huh,’ and a long time has passed since then, but I finally tried it. What the hell is this? It’s ridiculously delicious, damn it. It’s on a level where I won’t want to drink cola any other way anymore.”

Peanuts in Coke is one of the most accidentally perfect food pairings in history, and the chemistry explains why this guy can't go back.

Coca-Cola sits at pH 2.5, roughly the same acidity as stomach acid. When you drop roasted peanuts into that, the phosphoric acid partially… https://t.co/viykRGEwaJ
— Aakash Gupta (@aakashgupta) April 3, 2026

Are peanuts and Coke really an American tradition?

Apparently, this “American” tradition has been gaining traction in Japan, with people sharing their experiences on social media. But many Americans may be surprised to see Coke with peanuts described as a “popular” combo. It’s not really a common or widespread snack choice. For some, however, it’s a flash from the past.

“Southern kids did this all the time,” wrote one commenter. “Our folks would buy us an ice cold Coke in a bottle and a bag of peanuts, we’d drink some Coke, then funnel in some peanuts. Delicious and fun.”

“I learned this from my father, but it was Dr Pepper. He was stationed in Texas when he was in the Army. That’s where he learned about it.”

Peanuts and coke, sometimes called a "farmer's Coke" is a popular snack in the Southern United States made out of peanuts soaked in Coca-Cola
byu/behemuthm inwikipedia

“My very southern high school AP US History teacher swore by peanuts and Coke but was adamant that the only way to do it was in the little glass bottles that you only really now see at weddings and other functions. Not sure if there’s science to back that up.”

According to a few commenters, the combo also became popular in parts of Norway after people emigrated to the U.S. and then brought the idea back to Norway with them.

Where did peanuts and Coke come from?

How did it get started? According to The Local Palette, which explores the food culture of the South, the combo was known as “farmer’s Coke” and was a workingman’s beverage:

“Its fizzy refreshment bore sweet and salty satisfactions that could be savored during a work break. Some trace it back to the early decades of the twentieth century when ‘dope wagons’ roamed the grounds of textile mills before the advent of the vending machine. These food and beverage carts sold bottles of ‘dope,’ a nickname for Coca-Cola that was perhaps a reference to the days when the popular soda contained trace amounts of cocaine.“

Have you ever heard of salted peanuts in Coke? This Japanese guy just introduced me to this Southern tradition. I’m in Southern Florida and I’ve never heard of it. I looked it up and it’s a real thing from the 1920s among Southern farmers and workers for a quick sweet-salty… https://t.co/tAPt2DvtgS pic.twitter.com/gcXYuFCf1d
— Erinn (@ErinnFL) April 3, 2026

For farmers, pouring the peanuts into the soda bottle made sense. For one, it kept them from touching the nuts with dirty hands. It also meant they could eat and drink with just one hand.

There are multiple variations on the theme. Many people insist on taking a few sips from a bottle of Coke and then dumping the nuts straight into the bottle. Some say it has to be Mexican Coke, since it uses sugar instead of corn syrup. Others swear by RC Cola or Dr. Pepper instead of Coke. People disagree on whether the peanuts should be roasted or boiled.

Why peanuts and Coke make such a delicious combination

Sweet and salty is generally known to be an irresistible combination of flavors, so there’s that. But according to X user’s Aakash Gupta’s analysis, the chemistry that happens when you drop the nuts into the soda provides another layer of flavor:

“Coca-Cola sits at pH 2.5, roughly the same acidity as stomach acid. When you drop roasted peanuts into that, the phosphoric acid partially denatures the surface proteins on the nut, releasing free glutamate. You’re generating umami in real time inside the glass.

The salt on the peanuts suppresses bitter taste receptors on your tongue, which amplifies your perception of sweetness without adding a single gram of sugar. Coca-Cola already has 39g of sugar per can. Your brain registers it as even sweeter because the salt is clearing the noise from competing flavor signals.

Then carbonation does two things. CO2 dissolved in liquid forms carbonic acid, which triggers pain receptors (TRPA1), not taste receptors. That mild irritation resets your palate between sips so you never get flavor fatigue. Every sip hits like the first. Second, the bubbles physically agitate the peanut surface, accelerating the protein breakdown and glutamate release. The longer the peanuts sit, the more umami you extract.

The fat content seals it. Peanuts are 49% fat by weight. Fat is the only macronutrient that activates CD36 receptors, which your brain interprets as richness and satisfaction. Mix that with sugar, salt, acid, umami, and carbonation and you’ve accidentally triggered every major reward pathway in the human taste system simultaneously.“

Sounds fancy. Perhaps it’s worth a try. If nothing else, the trend is creating some fun intercultural exchanges with our fellow humans on the other side of the world.

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A CEO says she no longer "allows" employees time off. She does this instead. – Photo credit: Canva Photos

Culture, Wholesome

CEO explains why she doesn’t allow employees to take mental health days

“I don’t care if you need a break.”

Evan Porter

4/4/2026

There are bad bosses, good bosses, and sometimes, there are even great bosses. LinkedIn, infamously, is home to all three, and when scrolling through the randomly curated feed, you’re never quite sure what you’re going to get.

That’s why Stephanie Barney, CEO of Girls on the Go, raised some serious eyebrows with one of her recent posts.

CEO “doesn’t allow” mental health days

Barney spends her days running Girls on the Go, a health and wellness community for women that focuses on in-person, girl-only events that help members “combat loneliness, stay active, socialise and make new friends.“

As CEO, Barney is in charge of a small but growing team. And she recently took to LinkedIn to share one key element of her management style.

“I don’t allow my employees to take mental health days,” she wrote in the post. That provocative opening line is what the kids would call textbook “rage-bait.”

People were ready to go off on Barney in the comments. That is, of course, until they kept reading.

“I don’t care if you need a break. I don’t care if you can’t get out of bed. I don’t care if you have a doctors appointment,” the post continued.

And then came the punchline: “Because I TRUST my employees.”

The Gen Z CEO went on to explain that her wording was very intentional and not purely there to grab eyeballs. “I don’t ‘allow them’ to do anything. I trust that they know when they feel most productive and when they work the best.”

Read the whole post here:

Approach has yielded great results in a short amount of time

Barney is only in her early twenties and doesn’t have the management experience of a lot of her peers on LinkedIn, but her bona-fides are already beginning to speak for themselves.

Barney was named Merseyside’s Woman of the Year in 2025 when she was just 23 years old.

The founder of the award noted at the time, “What Stephanie has built in such a short time and at such a young age is nothing short of remarkable. Not only has she built a safe, inclusive and diverse community of women and girls that is actively tackling the issue of loneliness and isolation, she has made it financially sustainable [while], delivering social impact.”

There’s more going on here than just the Gen Z passion for better work-life balance. Turns out, trusting your employees is a strong management style.

View this post on Instagram

Post strikes a cord on LinkedIn

Thousands of people Liked Barney’s post, with hundreds more chiming in in the comments section:

“Congrats on being a fabulous boss and striving to create work environments and experiences empowering your team”

“Most bosses throughout my 35 year career haven’t gotten it. No latitude. “

“When people feel safe to manage their own time and energy, they don’t just survive at work, they thrive.”

“Reminds me of high school vs college where the professors were like you’re all adults don’t ask to use the restroom just go. Be a post-college workplace, not a high school workplace”

The stigma of mental health days

Barney’s post taps into an unspoken stigma about “mental health days.” Sometimes, we all need one to be at our best. But asking for one feels weak and vulnerable, even though one in five Americans receive treatment for their mental health, according to MIT’s Sloan School of Management. It’s not uncommon, weird, or unnecessary. And yet, the stigma persists.

“In reality, talking about mental illness or asking for a mental health day at many offices is risky,” writes Talkspace. “Only the most progressive companies provide mental health days or create an environment where it is safe to ask for one.”

An incredibly innovative solution: Don’t make anyone ask, or worse, lie.

Research is conclusive that vacation, or even just a rest day at home, makes us better and more productive employees. Barney is right: CEOs shouldn’t “allow” this time off. They should trust their colleagues to know when it’s needed and act accordingly.

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Checking the weather today is a lot different than it was in the 90s. – Photo credit: Canva

Culture, Nostalgia

The Weather Channel’s new ‘retro’ option for forecasts triggers a deluge of 90s nostalgia

People find the simple graphics and smooth jazz oddly comforting.

Annie Reneau

4/4/2026

Remember the time shortly before the internet, when “scrolling” looked like flipping channels on the TV to see what was on? After passing up news, reruns, game shows, an old movie, and the public access station, you’d land on The Weather Channel. Suddenly, you’d find yourself checking the forecast and zoning out to whatever smooth jazz tunes accompanied the text on screen.

If that description triggered some cozy, comfy nostalgia for you, you’re in for a treat. The Weather Channel has launched a “retro forecast” option on its website that lets you see your local forecast as it looked way back when.

Go to weather.com/retro and click on the “START RETROCAST” button. This is what it looks (and sounds) like, customized to your local area:

Just now finding out about @weatherchannel’s retro option, music and everything, and I am weeping openly. Feels so good to be back baby https://t.co/ksAqfptyKS pic.twitter.com/7c9h4hImfF
— Kurt, etc. (@Kurt_A_Eff) April 1, 2026

It almost feels like time travel, doesn’t it? People who remember this simpler time are expressing how much they love the RetroCast:

“That scream you just heard was millions of millennial hearts reawakening to sounds we haven’t heard but missed.”

“Ohh… that makes me miss my grandpa. He had that channel on 24/7 when it first came out. It was the theme song to ‘Staying with Grandpa and Grandma.’”

“I used to like during Christmas time, they would play the entire album of A Charlie Brown Christmas by The Vince Guaraldi Trio. They’d also play classic Christmas Tunes as well but I will always remember them play Charlie Brown Christmas.”

“The only way my 1999 baby would sleep. Now we are getting ready to welcome her baby.”

No this is not a joke…Retro Weather Channel is officially back! 🎶 Head to https://t.co/sJgpOSHVgR enjoy RetroCast Now for your forecasts in the way you know and love. 💙🎷☀️
— The Weather Channel (@weatherchannel) April 2, 2026

“World needs more of this. I love seeing history being respected and represented this way.”

“That was a nostalgic feel-good ride if I do say so myself!! Thank you for that whoever found this!!! Weather channel needs to make this an app lol.”

“This is also a time-traveling machine. It instantly took me back to my junior year in high school in South Bend, IN, a place where keeping track of the weather matters more (out here it’s just hot, slightly cold, and maybe a few drops fall now and then). All sorts of good time memories came ‘flooding’ in. Peak nostalgia!”

“If you brought this back as a TV channel, you’d have the highest-rated channel with Gen X and Millennials.”

Today, The Weather Channel is…different. Not necessarily in a bad way, but it’s definitely busier. Weather forecasting has come a long way in the last 30 years, but so have television production, graphics, visual effects, and even fonts. Sometimes, that can be great. But it can also be a lot.

There’s something to be said for simple utility, and that’s what this retro forecast provides. No fancy graphics and multiple chyrons. No commentary. Just some cheesy music and dropshadowed fonts informing us about current conditions, sunrise and sunset times, and the local forecast.

The enthusiastic response to the retro forecast echoes the growing movement toward slower, more analog experiences. The digital age has its benefits, no doubt. But digital fatigue is real, our attention spans have taken a beating, and there’s a sense that something has to change. For many, that change looks like revisiting the habits of a simpler time, which this retro weather forecast offering represents.

Obviously, watching a retro Weather Channel forecast isn’t going to solve anyone’s issues with technology overwhelm. But the desire for it is a signal that deserves our attention. Nostalgia isn’t just a sweet feeling of remembrance in the modern era, after all. It’s also a yearning for simplicity in an increasingly complex world.

And perhaps zoning out to smooth jazz for a bit gives us a much-needed respite from the digital storm we’re living in.

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The Artemis II mission is sending four astronauts around the moon. – Photo credit: NASA/Bill Ingalls

Culture, Wholesome

Why a seasoned journalist’s childlike joy at the Artemis II launch is worth celebrating

Her endearing reaction is a needed antidote.

Annie Reneau

4/4/2026

When the Apollo 11 space shuttle launched in 1969, millions of people gathered around their TVs to watch it live. The idea that humans could land on the moon a mere 66 years after the Wright Brothers’ first flight here on Earth inspired awe around the world.

Since then, we’ve seen countless rocket launches. But that doesn’t make a historic mission any less awe-inspiring to witness in person, as evidenced by BBC Science Editor Rebecca Morelle’s giddy reaction to watching the Artemis II shuttle launch in person.

Morelle reported on the launch as it happened with refreshing, childlike joy. Journalists are trained to be dispassionate, and Morelle is a seasoned professional. But her spontaneous “Oh my goodness, that is spectacular!” and the tears in her eyes as she described what she was seeing revealed the emotion of the moment.

Watch:

@bbcnews
Nasa’s first crewed mission around the Moon in more than 50 years has taken off from Florida. #Nasa #Artemis #Rocket #Space #Moon #ArtemisII #USNews #BBCNews
♬ original sound – BBC News – BBC News

Morelle’s awe and wonder were palpable. They were also understandable. The historic Artemis II mission will take astronauts around the moon, farther from Earth than any humans have ever gone before. And as Morelle said, Artemis is the most powerful rocket NASA has ever built. That’s worth getting excited about, especially if you love science as much as she does.

However, some can’t help but question the authenticity of moments like this. Some have become cynical from the chaos in the world. Younger generations may see such emotional expression as “cringe.” Some may be skeptical of taking this science reporter’s emotions at face value.

But the tears in her eyes and her gasps of wonder tell a story of genuine joy. And many of the comments demonstrate people’s need for positivity:

“They sent the right reporter! 👍👍 Love her excitement.”

“I’m glad they sent someone as excited as her to be there.”

“Her excitement is literally so amazing during these dark dark times.”

“She is the sweetest. Life needs more joy.”

“Adorable. Protect her at all costs.”

“Agreed. I like watching people who enjoy their job. Makes me enjoy it more!”

“Yeah, it is important to always align work with people’s passions. She loves being there. Good work, BBC.”

I’m so glad the BBC sent her to be the reporter on this! She appreciated every moment of the #Artemis launch so much!! 🚀 pic.twitter.com/Rbh6rXcn91
— Iris Seraphina  (@iris_seraphina) April 2, 2026

“Having watched a rocket launch in person from the Saturn V center (which is where they’re at) it’s honestly impossible to NOT get excited. The feeling is electrifying and you really feel the force of your rocket through your bones.”

“Watching any launch is insane, being there is an event. She’s 1000% justified and I love her not being modest for performance sake.”

“Dear world. It’s okay to celebrate and be happy.”

“Sadly, it’s a sign of the times we live in. People have lost their joy and view everything through a lens of negativity. Unfortunately, we’re bombarded with assaults against humanity on a daily basis and people have become desensitized to their natural emotions and have become guarded. It is what it is unfortunately.”

Oh I love reaction it’s infectious!! That’s how excited you should be!!

It’s also so nice to see someone speaking and acting in a positive way on the news ❤️🙏👏

Love that Emotion! pic.twitter.com/NAmpwuLliJ
— Benonwine (@benonwine) April 2, 2026

So many people are weary of negativity and thirsty for genuine joy. Seeing Morelle’s pure, wholesome display of emotion feels like a balm for our battered spirits. Indeed, joy is good for both our physical and mental health, so indulging it makes good sense. If cynicism is a poison, this video is the antidote.

Thank you, Rebecca Morelle, for letting this moment take you for an emotional ride, and for bringing us all along with you. So many of us needed that.

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Fashion designer Betsey Johnson on the runway. – Photo credit: The Heart Truth, Wikimedia Commons

Culture, Wholesome

Fashion icon Betsey Johnson has the most punk rock message about turning 83

“Ya know, if you can do the splits every year, that would be a good thing.”

Cecily Knobler

4/4/2026

Fashion designer Betsey Johnson was punk rock before punk rock was even a thing. In the 1960s, she won the Mademoiselle Guest Editor contest. By 1969, she had her own store with Andy Warhol favorite Edie Sedgwick as one of her top models. By the ’70s, Johnson was the go-to for many rockers, and by the 1980s…she was a household name.

Turning 83 does not seem to have slowed her down. In a fabulous speech posted recently on Advanced Style’s Instagram page, Johnson does the splits to prove that age really is just a number. She stands in her signature black and white striped low-waisted dress, with punk golden blonde spiky bangs and red lipstick, while she dives deep into what it means to be over 80.

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You finally gel at 80

In hot pink lettering, the chyron on the video reads, “Betsey Johnson on aging and acceptance at 83.” Johnson begins by sharing that one’s 80s are an amazing time. “You finally gel. Whatever, you’re cooked! You’re done. And hopefully, you have the confidence to enjoy the cooking process all the years.”

We hear a gasp as Johnson then flings herself into her signature splits. (Note: she has often been known to do these at the end of fashion shows and on red carpets.) Of the fact that she can do them with such ease, she says, “Of course I do, darling. I swore that I always would. I was an aerialist. I never wanted to stiffen up. So I promised, I just said ‘ya know, if you can do the splits every year, that would be a good thing.’”

She then confesses that one of her signature looks is an absolute must for her to function. “Everyone knows I can’t work, I can’t talk, I can’t think, I can’t do anything but sleep without lipstick. I’m always putting lipstick on.” She admits, however, that there’s not much more to her youthful vibe. “But I have no beauty regime. No nothing.”

What’s the secret?

The interviewer asks what the secret is to “looking so fab.” Johnson is now wearing a gold crown and begins to pull on her face. At first, she mentions needing a lot of “work,” but then she stops herself. “I have to live with what’s happening now.” While she says she tweaked a little in her 60s and 70s, she’s “finally at the point where I have to accept I feel good. That to me is the major thing. I really feel great!”

She reiterates that she doesn’t “feel” old. “I don’t feel my age at all. I feel maybe 32, 35, something like that. And 80 doesn’t mean that I can’t wear anything that I wouldn’t wear at 20.”

Betsey’s closet

Speaking of, she shows off her incredible closet. “I have the designer closet from hell,” she says, confessing that she only wears about five outfits and no longer “bothers with clothes.” In a sense, this is how it’s always been. “I’ve always liked what I’ve liked, and if it’s fashionable, great, if it isn’t, great! That’s why my favorite stuff is years old.” She holds up an oddly shaped, colorful dress. “This is from 1983,” she shares.

She continues, “I think there’s a real need for ‘weird.’ You know, just off-center. You just don’t expect it. You’ve never seen it. It’s brand new, it’s a surprise! You feel young again. You’re seeing something new. Well, weird is something great on top of ‘new.’”

Johnson then shows off some incredible items from the closet, one of which is a dress made out of old hair extensions! There are also blue sequined ’60s vintage vests, and an old Vivienne corset. It all makes sense when she explains she always wanted to be a Rockette. “All my dancing costumes were my entire inspiration for all my stuff.” “

She finishes by reiterating how important it is to own who you are. “If you don’t celebrate now, it’s a different kind of celebration. I like that I’m free from the memories. It’s not this, it’s not that, I can be brand new. Whatever!”

Her fans adore her

There are over 185,000 likes and 11,000 comments from other celebrities and fans. Musician Annie Lennox enthusiastically shares, “Absolutely BRILLIANT, Betsey!”

Another fan writes that Johnson continues to serve as an inspiration. “She’s always so kind and full of excitement for life. It’s no surprise she’s in such great health. I aspire.”

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A post shared by Betsey Johnson (@betseyjohnson)

And this fan is moved by Johnson’s sentiment, writing, “Besides loving your over-the-top sense of fashion, and the products you have created, seeing this raw interview of you is absolutely priceless and SO INSPIRING! My mother is a spry artist 84 years young. Her positive outlook is what keeps her going. My job is to keep her looking fabulous at every time. Doing splits at 80? I will definitely share this with her! – Your Drag Queen Fan”

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Rick Steves has made a lucrative career out of travel. – Photo credit: Rick Steves' Europe

Culture, Politics

Rick Steves celebrates new ‘millionaires tax’ in Washington he’ll have to pay: ‘I like it’

The millionaire travel mogul shared why he’s celebrating what he calls a “common sense” tax.

Annie Reneau

4/4/2026

Let’s be real: most of us don’t want to pay more taxes than we have to. Even when we know taxes are necessary for public services, we’re not usually enthusiastic about paying more ourselves.

Rick Steves sees it differently. Arguably the original “travel influencer,” Steves has spent decades building a booming business as a global tour guide. In 2019, his company, which he solely owns, generated $100 million in annual revenue. As a longtime Washington state resident, he has enjoyed the perk of paying no state taxes on his personal income. But that’s about to change, and Steves is surprisingly happy about it.

Steves praises the upcoming tax on “fat paychecks”

“A new tax on fat paychecks like mine was just signed into law in my home state — and I like it,” Steves wrote in a Facebook post. “In 2029, Washington state will start collecting a 9.9% tax on income over $1 million. The 8,000,000 Washingtonians whose households make less than a million dollars a year will pay zero under this new tax and enjoy all the benefits of a better-funded state. And for the wealthy (like me and an estimated 30,000 others), every million dollars in taxable income that our households earn after the first million will cost us about $100,000.”

Steves is referring to the so-called “millionaires tax” that Washington Governor Bob Ferguson signed into law after it passed the state legislature in March 2026. Under the new law, Washington residents will pay no taxes on their first $1 million in annual income. Any income above that threshold will be taxed at 9.9%.

Steves addresses Washington’s regressive tax system

“It takes a lot of money to run a state that’s as livable as ours,” Steves continued. “Yet Washington is one of only nine states that don’t currently levy a traditional income tax. Our state is still funded by consumption taxes, such as sales and excise taxes, giving us the second-most regressive tax code in the country. (Only Florida has us beat.) And it’s time for Washington millionaires to pay our fair share.”

Washington Gov. Bob Ferguson signed the so-called 'millionaires tax' into law, enacting a 9.9% income tax on earnings of more than $1 million a year. https://t.co/7IFqu5EGKw
— The Seattle Times (@seattletimes) March 30, 2026

A regressive tax code places a higher burden on lower-income earners. Because Washington doesn’t have a state income tax, it relies on other sources of revenue, such as property and excise taxes, including sales tax.

According to the Washington Department of Revenue, the lowest-income households in the state pay 15.7 percent of their income in excise and property taxes, while the highest-income households pay just 4.4 percent.

He pushed back against the idea that taxing high earners unfairly burdens the wealthy

“As a wealthy person myself, I see this tax as essentially free money for all Washingtonians,” he wrote. “Everybody in my state gains. And speaking from personal experience, I know that anyone who earns enough to be subject to this tax is beyond the point where consuming more adds to their security, their well-being, or even, arguably, their happiness — meaning there will be basically zero human cost.

If you disagree, consider the minuscule impact this tax will have on my state’s millionaires. Now, contrast that with the value of close to $4 billion a year in tax revenue once it’s smartly invested in programs that will help the roughly one-third of Washington households living paycheck to paycheck.”

Senators debated the merits of the bill before it ultimately passed:

“For those who still aren’t convinced,” Steves continued, “here’s a lesson I’ve learned in my travels: Even if you’re motivated only by greed, if you know what’s good for you, you don’t want to be filthy rich in a society with a huge gap between rich and poor. It’s just not a nice place to raise your kids. And remember: Shrouds have no pockets…especially if you’re a multimillionaire with no heart for your neighbors.”

Steves added that it “feels good” to help build a better community for himself and his neighbors. After seeing firsthand the decimation of community programs following previous tax breaks for the wealthy, he began donating a “self-imposed wealth tax” to his local arts center and symphony. He said his $100,000-plus annual donation has brought him “great joy for 15 years and counting,” but has also been “a little lonely.”

Steves said “it just feels right to pay a little extra” as a millionaire earner

He concluded with three big reasons for celebrating his new tax output:

“For me, it’s biblical (‘To whom much is given, much will be required’)… It’s European (after all, societies that are equitably funded are much more ‘content’ than ours)… And — for those of us with a heart for the public good — it’s simply common sense.”

A $1,000,000 annual salary works out to over $19,000 a week before taxes. Photo credit: Canva

Steves received thousands of comments on his post, most praising his attitude:

“You are a wonderful person to have in WA. Bless you and your big huge heart. You may have just helped to change how I felt about it. Kindness lives.”

“You are a good man and our society needs more like you. I am happy to pay my fair share so that all of my fellow Americans can live in dignity. We all should be willing to do that for our countrymen.”

“Thank you Rick Steves! You’re a model of how prosperity need not be soul-killing. I’m proud to share this great state with people like you.”

“It’s so refreshing to hear such positive comments from a millionaire who will actually be affected by the tax. Too often we see or hear that those with money will be escaping having to pay the tax by moving away. You are setting an example of a true patriot and citizen. Thank you for showing us true responsibility!”

“This is how I feel about wealth taxes and you summed it up so nicely. If I’m wealthy and making a high income, I should be happy to pay more taxes to help those who are less wealthy. Wealthy people need to contribute to reducing the rich-poor gap. EVEN the greedy who love their money should realize that reducing the rich-poor gap is good for them. Trickle down economics and tax cuts for the rich have brought us to where we are – too much money and power in the hands of too few; the rich get richer and the poor get poorer; and an unsustainable situation.”

Not all wealthy Washingtonians share Steves’ opinion, of course, but it’s helpful to hear the perspective of someone who will actually be paying the tax when it goes into effect.

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Chappell Roan (left) and an inflatable unicorn costume (right). – Photo credit: Raph_PH/Wikipedia & Canva

Culture, Wholesome

Boy stuns crowd with his piano cover of ‘Pink Pony Club,’ all while wearing a unicorn costume

Magical in so many ways.

Heather Wake

4/4/2026

Just when you think you’ve experienced every amazing rendition of Chappell Roan’s ”Pink Pony Club,” a 10-year-old in a blow-up unicorn costume comes along and raises the bar once again.

In a video shared to TikTok, a boy named Caleb twirled his way onto the stage for his school’s talent show, all before settling at the piano and expertly playing a jaunty instrumental version of the popular tune.

Caleb’s mom, who posted the video, aptly wrote, “boys got talent for days, and fearless to boot” in the caption.

More than 14 million views later, people were floored by both of those qualities.

@baumanna000
Pink pony on piano!!!! 🦄❤️ Boys got talent for days! And fearless to boot #pinkponyclub #talentshow #chappelroan #kidsoftiktok
♬ original sound – Anna🌻

“I wanna be like him when I grow up’

“Tell him to stay whimsy forever.”

“I hope he knows how cool he actually is.”

In an interview with People, Michael, Caleb’s father, said Caleb began playing piano at age seven and quickly fell in love with how it helped him focus. Since then, he has developed a routine of practicing for 10 minutes a day, every day.

As for the costume idea, he came up with that entirely on his own. And this doesn’t seem to be the first time Caleb has dressed up to make music. Here he is unleashing his Captain Jack Sparrow while playing the Pirates of the Caribbean main theme:

@baumanna000
The Pink Pony has moved on to his next role!!! Can you guess what part he got in the school play? Costume fit check 🏴‍☠️ #kidsoftiktok #joy #wholesome
♬ original sound – Anna🌻

And here he is in a Deadpool costume. Sure, no piano involved, but the dance is too cute not to share:

@baumanna000
My 9 year old is such a vibe! Don’t mind the back up dancer 🐶 #deadpool #kidsgonewild @Ryan Reynolds
♬ Bye Bye Bye – *NSYNC

It’s all a testament to Caleb’s personality. “He is a sweet boy who is full of positivity and brings fun energy to everything he does,” his father gushed.

Really, that joy might be the most impressive part of all. Plenty of kids learn instruments quickly. Plenty of kids perform well in talent shows. But not every kid walks onstage in a giant inflatable unicorn suit, totally uninhibited, completely themselves, and turns a performance into something people remember long after the final note fades.

And if the Internet’s reaction is any indication, people are craving exactly this kind of wholesome, joyful content. Polished performances are great, but there’s something extra special about a kid who shows up, has fun, and brings everyone along for the ride.

Beyond the instant dose of dopamine, we can all take away some tried-and-true wisdom behind Caleb’s refreshingly simple approach: Practice a little every day. Commit to what you love. Add whatever makes you smile. It’s the kind of formula adults tend to overcomplicate, even though it works just as well at any age.

Bottom line: confidence grows when we are brave enough to fully express ourselves. Whether that’s dressing up as a pirate, a superhero, or a unicorn, or giving ourselves permission to be playful and try new things. As Caleb reminds us, a little whimsy goes a long way.

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An elderly woman eating. – Photo credit: Canva

Culture, Wholesome

Man aims to change the face of caregiving after getting flak for showering with grandma

“Most people have never seen what actual caregiving looks like”

Jacalyn Wetzel

4/4/2026

Caregiving is a female-dominated field, and that’s not just in the professional world. It’s estimated that approximately 66% of informal family caregiving is done by women, so it’s not often that men are seen as caregivers. One man aims to change that by sharing his caregiving journey on social media.

Chris Punsalan was the primary caregiver for his elderly grandmother before her death. He uses his platform to normalize men being in the role of caregivers, but recently, he received some unexpected backlash. Several months ago, the Millennial shared a video of himself caring for his grandmother as usual, but this time it showed him hopping in the shower with her.

A young person helping an elderly person wash their hands.
Photo credit: Canva

There was nothing inappropriate to be viewed in the video, as the grandmother was already behind the privacy glass. Punsalan was wearing black shorts when he got into the shower to help his grandmother. Seeing this vulnerable reality of caregiving for an elderly relative set some people off. The content creator received several comments chastising him, and others implying that he had an inappropriate relationship with his grandmother.

Caregiving for an elderly relative can be a difficult task, especially when you’re their primary caregiver. As people age, they need more assistance with daily living activities like bathing, toileting, and eating. This is not uncommon, but caregiving for these family members is often done quietly. Those who can afford full-time professional caregivers or an assisted living facility pay for this type of care. But every family isn’t in that position, so they may divide caregiving duties among themselves.

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It’s unclear why Punsalan started caring for his grandmother, but it’s evident that he wanted to ensure she was receiving the best care. He is tackling stigma and showing men in a more gentle light. So when he saw the negative comments questioning his actions, he decided to address them directly.

In the video, he shows a clip from the previous video of him getting in the shower to help his grandmother.

“Most people have never seen what actual caregiving looks like, and I didn’t either when I first started,” he says. “I was my grandmother’s full-time caregiver. She had osteoporosis, severe arthritis, and in the last couple of years of her life, she had dementia, so I helped her with almost everything. Taking a shower, helping her eat meals, use the restroom, get around the house.”

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He further explains that there was no manual on caring for his grandma, nor did he receive professional training. The process was trial and error while making sure his grandmother was safe and cared for.

“It was really weird to help my grandmother shower, but you eventually get over it,” Punsalan says. “If I had just seen another person on the Internet that looked like me, a young male helping ‘the old woman’ when it was time for me to step up and do that for my grandmother, it would’ve been so much easier.”

He shared that he hopes continuing to post these videos will shed light on what to expect for others who may find themselves in a similar role. Punsalan’s message resonated with viewers, many of whom flocked to the comments to show their support.

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One person says, “Bathing is all part of caregiving. We are all humans. We all have human parts. Get over it. It’s what nurses would do if you were in the hospital. People that say these things just have no concept and if the roles were reversed they’d get it.”

Another writes, “I bathe and care for my disabled brother. He’s only two years younger than me but has used diapers all his life as well. Thank you for sharing your experience and educating people about this line of work. People make situations weird because THEIR mind is in the gutter.”

Someone else shares, “Your grandmother was so lucky to have you there. There are lots of initially uncomfortable tasks (especially as a grandkid) that you grow accustomed to as a caregiver that often illicit judgment from people on the outside who possess very little understanding of the big difficulties involved in all of the little tasks, and even more so with a dementia patient! The way you use your platform is so helpful. Not only as a comfort to fellow caregivers, but also as an awareness guide to so many. Keep up the great work!”

A caregiver helping an elderly person with a walker.
Photo credit: Canva

“Before caregiving you really don’t know what you are getting yourself into but gradually you are doing all the things that your loved one can’t do for themselves because you love them and honor them and respect them,” one commenter writes. “Duties are endless and yes very personal and intimate. We love them so we do it and we also get used to it and want to keep them clean and comfortable.”

Though Punsalan’s grandmother has since passed, he continues to share videos to guide others. After caring for his grandmother for eight years, he shares that he felt lost, so he now dedicates his time to Tendercare as their creative director. The company helps connect caregivers with trusted professionals, furthering Punsalan’s goal of helping caregivers feel less alone.

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