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The Swedish resistance to feeding guests may not actually be as rude as it seems

A viral post about Swedish households excluding guests from meals created a flurry of debate over cultural norms.

The Swedish resistance to feeding guests may not actually be as rude as it seems
Photo by Gabriella Clare Marino on Unsplash, @SamQari/Twitter

Sweden's cultural norm of not feeding unexpected guests resulted in a flurry of debate over hospitality.

Growing up, I was taught that it was rude to slurp food at the dinner table. In most American households, if you ate a bowl of soup and audibly slurped the noodles out of your bowl, people would assume you never learned proper table manners.

As an adult, though, I lived in Japan for a year, where it is not only acceptable to slurp your noodles loudly around others, but it's actually considered good manners. Noodle slurping is an integral part of Japanese food culture, a norm that feels strange or even wrong to people from most other cultures.

This difference was the first thing that came to mind when I saw a flurry of debate recently about a Swedish cultural food norm that some people find downright appalling.

It all started with a viral Reddit post asking about the weirdest thing people have had to do in someone's home due to their culture or religion. One responder described being made to wait in a Swedish friend's bedroom while the friend had dinner with their family.

"While we were playing in his room, his mom yelled that dinner was ready. And check this. He told me to WAIT in his room while they ate," the person wrote.

Another comment followed describing a similar instance: "I slept over at a friend's house. When we woke up, he said he's going downstairs for a few minutes. After about 15 minutes I go on the stairs to see wtf is happening and they're eating breakfast. They see me and tell me he's almost done and will be up there soon."

Fast and furious responses followed, screenshots of the posts went viral on various social media platforms and the entire nation of Sweden took a beating as people berated their rude habits and lack of basic hospitality. The hashtag #Swedengate trended on Twitter for days as people shared all manner of negative impressions of (and in some cases, direct experiences from) Swedish culture.

I'm not here to defend Sweden wholesale, as I'm sure there are plenty of legitimate criticisms, as there are for every culture. However, when it comes to something like not feeding guests in your own home, it seems likely that there's some kind of explanation beyond "these people are just rude." Much like noodle slurping in Japan, one culture's rude can be another culture's polite.

As it turns out, there are a few explanations for it.

Part of Sweden's food culture is a combo of its long winters and culture of independence.

Professor Hakan Jonsson, a food studies professor at Lund University in Sweden, told The New York Times that some of the resistance to feeding guests stems from the days when food harvests had to be stored for many months during the long Nordic winter. Spontaneous dinners were traditionally not part of the culture, as families had to carefully plan and ration their food stores.

Independence is also a strong cultural value in Sweden, and rather than seen as generosity, feeding another person's child could be seen as a criticism of that family's ability to provide for their children.

“There has been a very strong urge of independence, to not rely on others’ good will for having a good and independent life,” Professor Jonsson told The Times.

(Hmm, now the entire IKEA model makes sense. Careful precision in design, but then, "Here, you're on your own to actually build it. Good luck.")

Others have shared similar explanations, saying that feeding someone else's child is in some ways considered rude, either because it's viewed as a judgment on the parents' ability to feed their children or as interfering with a family's own dinner.

"Swedes cook for the people they expect (family). Precise portions. We don't mind guests, just tell us in advance and we'll add one more. And in Sweden, it's understood, you don't eat at a friend's house unannounced. No big deal here," wrote one Twitter user.

Those explanations didn't stop people from cultures that place a high value on hospitality from criticizing the practice, of course. Not feeding a guest in your home is the peak of rudeness in certain cultures, so how could this practice be seen as OK in any way?

Part of Sweden's not-feeding-guests culture may be rooted in a history of shame for 'owing' people.

Another explanation shared on Twitter from an "amateur historian and sociologist" provides more historical context for the practice. It's a bit lengthy, but the gist is that this not-feeding norm isn't unique to Sweden, but common to Norse cultures in general and even somewhat common in Norman England and France. According to this explanation, it has to do with the historical "honor/shame economy" of Viking culture being a source of violent conflict.

"In Norse culture, hospitality (providing food, drink, lodging) was a duty of higher status individuals towards people of lower status, but the act of receiving hospitality created an obligation or debt on the part of the recipient," @WallySierk wrote. "So, hospitality not only brought honor to the giver, it had the potential to bring shame to the recipient. Norse culture, and as it progressed through the Middle Ages, was incredibly personally violent. People fought duels, violently extracted debts and squeezed renters."

"One of the challenges of the Protestant church in Scandinavia post-30 years war was to create a culture that tamped down on personal violence and civic unrest," they continued. "Since the root of a lot of the interpersonal violence was competition for status and extraction of payment, the Church, with the framing of early Protestant Humanists, began to promote the ideal of the free member of society, owing no one and owed nothing. If the culture could get rid of the interactions that caused friction, people could live more peaceful lives."

The thread explains that inequality and industrialization in the 1700s and early 1800s pushed Scandinavians to emigrate to America and other colonies, leading some people in power to manipulate debts, which created a lot of pain.

"When people were able to escape debt, they felt a lot better. So, for the sake of egalitarianism and reduction of conflict, they created a society that minimized the creation of debt and obligation, and maximized the ability of the individual/family to be self-sufficient. This 'not feeding the neighbor kids' weirdness Is about maintaining peace in the community."

From reading replies from Swedes, it appears this practice is common, but not necessarily universal. It also appears to be primarily about guests who are not planned for in advance, not a blanket "we don't do hospitality" norm. Still, it is a stark contrast to cultures in which offering food to any guest in your home is simply par for the course. The idea that you would not only not offer, but actively not serve a guest food is a complete anathema in many countries and cultures around the world.

But when you dig into the roots of why those norms exist, it's not quite as blatantly rude as it seems. Cultural norms rooted in historical struggle take a long time to change, even when those struggles are no longer front and center.

All I'm saying is let's give the Swedes a teensy bit of grace on the food front. They may come across as stingy to many of us, but in the context of their own history, it makes some sense. Plus those IKEA Swedish meatballs are hard to beat.


This article originally appeared on 6.3.22

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34 broken bones, a mural, and Buddy the Elf—what these three things have in common

"I never thought I’d run again. But against the odds, here I am."

34 broken bones, a mural, and Buddy the Elf—what these three things have in common
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The Bank of America Chicago Marathon took place on Sunday, October 12th. Every runner who took on the enormous feat of 26.2 miles is truly an inspiration. We’re proud to share three outstanding stories about the power of community, giving back and crossing the finish line. Not only did they run an outstanding distance, but they each also gave back by fundraising for an organization that changes lives for the better.

Running a marathon is so much more than race day. It’s sticking to a schedule, getting enough rest, learning how to fuel your body for long distances, and—perhaps the most challenging of all—building mental resilience.


Meet Leanne: Running after 34 Bone Fractures

Leanne was only 12 years old when during her middle school cross country practice, she fractured her right tibia, the shin bone in her leg. This wasn’t Leanne’s first time breaking a bone—it was actually her 34th fracture. After many years of being overlooked as "clumsy," Leanne felt immense relief and recognition when a doctor diagnosed her with brittle bone disease, an incredibly rare condition.

Lurie Children’s provided a care plan for Leanne to build strength and start running again. And as of October 12th, Leanne ran her second Bank of America Chicago Marathon. She said in an interview, “I never thought I’d run again. But against the odds, here I am, training for my second Bank of America Chicago Marathon... all because of Lurie Children’s.”

Leanne’s impressive journey is a testament to the incredible research of Lurie Children’s, where she gives back by volunteering at the hospital and running on its behalf. Talk about being a true inspiration.


Meet Everett: Running to Inspire Through Art

Everett is an artist who creates beautiful murals around the city of Chicago. He uses his art as a tool for storytelling for community and connection.

In addition to being an artist, Everett is a runner. He ran the 2025 Bank of America Chicago Marathon on behalf of Peace Runners 773, a non-profit organization that strengthens the community of Chicago. In this video, we follow Everett on a run to visit some of his favorite murals. The run ends at Garfield Park, where Everett just finished a mural that he dedicated to the organization—symbolizing growth, strength and togetherness. Everett didn’t stop there.

While building his strength as a runner, Everett is strengthening his city of Chicago. Through his running and artwork, Everett has brought more awareness and resources to his community.

Meet Joseph: Running on Behalf of Special Olympics


Joseph ran the Chicago Marathon on behalf of Special Olympics, dedicating each mile to one of 26 friends with a developmental disability. The last 1.2 miles were extra special. It was for one of his closest friends, Matt.

In this video, Joseph runs to Matt’s house. For every mile of this training run, he tells us a heartwarming anecdote about Matt. They met at camp and soon, Matt will be a groomsman in Joseph’s wedding. The duo even sends a Christmas card every year—most notably dressing up as Buddy the Elf and sharing a bowl of spaghetti with maple syrup (spoiler: it doesn’t taste good).

As Joseph runs, he says, “Before we get to Matt, a quick note about why I’m running on behalf of Special Olympics. Matt and I love sports. And so do many of my other friends. Donations help provide year-round sports training and competition for more than 20,000 people with intellectual disabilities across Illinois.”

Joseph is the perfect example of inspiration. Not only did he run an entire marathon, but he also found inspiration in his friends who love sports as much as he does.


Leanne, Everett and Joseph are three incredible people who have shown how much strength and perseverance it takes to run a marathon. Each runner is both empowering themselves and their community. Their dedication to the Bank of America Chicago Marathon shows that the people of Chicago have a passion for the city, their neighbors and their personal achievements.

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American shares his 9 realizations about the U.S. after 13 years abroad and it's eye-opening

“If you’ve never left, you can never understand what it’s really like…”

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Image credit: Evan Edinger/YouTube

You learn a lot about your country when you leave it for a while.

Evan Edinger moved to London over 13 years ago to study abroad but never planned on staying overseas permanently. His goal was to get his degree, return to the United States, start his career, and make a life for himself. He thought of his time in London as a "temporary adventure."

But when he finished his degree, he found himself in an unexpected situation: He didn't want to go back. "The longer I stayed in London," Edinger shares on his YouTube channel, "the more I began to notice all of the assumptions that I'd grown up believing in America, the things I was brought up to believe were undeniably true and just the way the world worked—it turns out they weren't true at all."

One of the benefits of living in another country is seeing your country of origin through different eyes. That perspective can cause you to appreciate some things and question other things. Edinger shares nine realizations he's had about the U.S. since he left, starting with one of the most quintessentially American realities he found himself questioning.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

1. Guns

Edinger grew up in New Jersey and describes it as "quite a blue state," but he was still immersed in the gun culture that views gun ownership as a fundamental part of being an American.

"I was raised in a very pro-gun household," Edinger says. "In my family home in America, we had a 12-gauge shotgun, a 10-gauge, a black powder rifle, and a .410 shotgun for the children. My dad would take us out some days to shoot empty cans of beer or play pigeons or sometimes go hunting for pheasants or deer."

He says the notion of not owning a gun was unthinkable in his upbringing. "The idea that other countries do not allow guns is viewed more like these other countries are missing a fundamental right," he says.

His ideas about guns have changed dramatically since moving to London and living in a society without ubiquitous access to guns. "Visiting Philadelphia when I was younger was always scary to me because I never knew who had a gun, who wanted to rob me," Edinger shares. "Visiting New Orleans a couple years ago, I was told by my hotel staff that a few days prior, a tourist was shot and died in the local Popeye's Chicken because he caught a stray bullet of two people having an argument in the restaurant. So, that's just something that people just have to deal with. This constant fear of I could just die being caught in a crossfire and there's nothing I can really do about it because freedom. I've pretty much never felt that level of fear in London at all. And that alone was enough to sway my opinion on guns."

guns, gun culture, gun violence, united states, second amendment The U.S. has a unique gun culture.Photo credit: Canva

2. Government

"One thing that's really drilled into you pretty much every year of American school is that American democracy is the end-all be-all of government and that it is the beacon of freedom other countries look to emulate. Then, once you become an adult and you see how dysfunctional the U.S. government is, you search for anything to feel better about it and usually settle on 'Well, at least it's not a third world dictatorship.'"

But those aren't the only two options. Edinger explains how the parliamentary system in the U.K. is far from perfect, but it tends to be more effective at actually getting things done because lawmakers aren't constantly stymied by the inherently destructive two-party gridlock we have in the U.S.

"It's messy, yes, but after 13 years away, I've come to the belief that no system of government is perfect," he says. "But most systems in Western Europe are far more effective than what I grew up believing was the 'best in the world.'"

3. Walkability and Public Transport

In the U.S., having a car is practically a symbol of freedom, but Edinger says he's never felt the need to have a car in his 13 years living in London. He says it's been incredibly freeing to be able to walk and take public transit everywhere, and not just in the city. He's been able to travel all over Europe, in larger cities and small towns, and the focus on walkable neighborhoods and public transportation is everywhere.

walkable cities, public transportation, car dependency, london underground, subway It's much easier to get around without a car in Europe. Photo credit: Canva

"After having spent some time living in walkable neighborhoods, I would never ever choose to live in a car dependent place ever again," Edinger says. "It is truly one of the most life-changing parts of living over here. And because I'm always walking everywhere, because I'm always cycling everywhere, it's so much easier to be healthy and physically fit without even trying."

4. Food Quality and Price

Europe has different regulations than the U.S., Edinger explains, with an approach that leads to a lot less additives and chemicals being added to foods.

"Europe's food agency focuses on possibilities and the U.S.'s focuses on probabilities. Is it possible an unnecessary additive could be harmful? Europe prohibits it just to be safe. The US agency, the FDA, they only step in if the probability of it being harmful is high. So, that risk is passed on to the average American consumer."

Edinger also points out that the ability to walk down to the store to get fresh ingredients regularly makes it a lot easier to eat well. "It's one of those things where once you experience both, there is no contest. No contest. So, it's much easier to be healthy in Europe than in America."

5. Healthcare in the U.S. vs. Europe

"If my health does have issues, I am glad it's not something that would ever bankrupt me or cause me to ever think about how much it would have to cost me just to be sick," says Edinger.

Americans often hear horror stories about socialized medicine, but Edinger's experience with going to the doctor and even going to the hospital have been positive, and barely cost him anything.

health, healthcare, universal healthcare, health insurance, cost of healthcare The U.S. is an outlier in the world when it comes to healthcare costs. Photo credit: Canva

"There are only two types of people that are against the freeing social safety net that is universal healthcare," says Edinger. "People that have never experienced socialized healthcare and people that profit from the broken system. That's it." Most Americans want it, but "most Americans" is not where the money is.

6. Consumer Protections in the U.S. vs Europe

Edinger shares that he bought a MacBook Pro in 2019 that didn't work right, and he hadn't purchased AppleCare because he knew he didn't have to.

"If you buy a tech product in Europe, you have a reasonable expectation that it should last you at least two years free of defects," says Edinger. "And if it's not up to your expectations or breaks down before then, you can demand a return or replacement. This law protects consumers from shady business practices."

He ended up getting his full money back on the computer due to those consumer protections.

"It's laws like this where you really begin to notice a pattern that life in Europe is one that gives more rights to the everyday person over giant corporations and shared benefit over private," says Edinger.

7. Worker Rights

"A quick summary would be 28 days minimum paid holiday, one year paid maternity leave, two weeks paid paternity leave, sick leave, even the right against unlawful termination," said Edinger. "When working part-time at Urban Outfitters in London, even though I worked less than 20 hours a week, I still got two days paid holiday per month. That's insane, right? No, that's just life over here. Meanwhile, I worked five years at a Pizza Hut in New Jersey for over 30 hours per week. Never got a single day of paid vacation."

Indeed, there's more than a handful of European countries that guarantee at least a month of paid days off, with some countries actually requiring a certain number of days or weeks off.

vacation, holiday, paid vacation days, paid time off, work life balance Europeans get far more generous paid leave than Americans do.Photo credit: Canva

Edinger points out the irony that he was always taught that the U.S. was for the individual, for individual freedoms. But in his experience, in Europe individuals have more rights than those with money or power, while it's the opposite in the U.S.

8. Money (Live to work or work to live?)

Edinger says that most things are more affordable in Europe, from groceries to data plans, but Americans do earn higher salaries.

"So if you earn a lot of money and money is your sole defining metric of success, then you can feel a lot more successful in the U.S.," he says. "But because the culture in Europe is work to live and not live to work, you might find that the stress and cost tradeoffs and quality of life erode the value of that higher salary quite quickly."

9. On Romanticizing Europe

People often wonder if Americans romanticize Europe too much, and Edinger says the same question used to be asked of Europeans romanticizing America. But now that we have YouTube and social media and a better ability to see the realities of both places, he says what Americans "romanticize" about Europe is really just the things we want and don't have.

work-life balance, united states, working, european culture, worker rights Work-life balance is something a lot of Americans struggle with.Photo credit: Canva

"I think most Americans who are eyeing up Europe are doing so because of the things that America is lacking. Nearly two in three Americans want universal healthcare. Well, America doesn't offer that. Again, two in three Americans want European style vacation policies. America doesn't offer that. And 53% of Americans would prefer to live in a walkable neighborhood, but sorry, America doesn't offer that. The list goes on. If America were an actual democracy, I don't think many of these people would be having romanticized views of Europe at all because they wouldn't need to. They could have everything they wanted in the country they were born and raised."

Of course, every country has its problems and there are certainly downsides to moving abroad. Edinger acknowledges that but says it really boils down to what you value in life. Americans are taught to romanticize the U.S., and leaving it helps you see the reality, what's good about your country and where it has room for improvement.

"I think the main thing though out of everything that I miss about the U.S. that I can't really get here is not rights, not freedoms, not anything that's big on quality of life improvements," says Edinger. "It's just Mexican food and good ice cream."

You can follow Evan Edinger on YouTube for more on his experiences as an American living abroad.

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We asked people what social rule they'd enforce during flights. One sweet answer dominated.

If only we could actually make this an official rule.

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Photo credit: Canva

Following certain "rules" can make flying a lot better for everyone involved.

Flying on airplanes with dozens of perfect strangers is, in many ways, a social experiment. We're forced to sit in seats that aren't big enough for most of us, uncomfortably close to people we don't know (some of whom are stressed out or anxious), with unclear social etiquette rules we haven't all collectively agreed upon.

And yet we do it because the miracle of human flight enabling us to travel in hours to places that used to take days, weeks, or even longer, is too awesome to pass up. Most of us have things we'd prefer our fellow passengers do or not do to make the experience better for everyone, however, so we asked our Upworthy Facebook audience, "If you could enforce one social rule during flights, what would it be?" The responses were largely what you might expect and you can see them below, but there was one unexpected comment that stood out. The rule that received the most love, with over 1,200 likes, was this one:

dog, flying, airplane, good dog, golden retriever Can we please get a "meet the dog" rule on airplanes?Photo credit: Canva

Any dog on the plane has to visit every passenger that requests

While not everyone loves dogs, most people do. And what would make a flight more enjoyable than getting to meet a dog on board? Perhaps we can start a petition to make cabin doggy visits for anyone who wants them an official thing…

Other responses were helpful reminders of both common courtesy and somewhat standard airplane etiquette for those who might not fly often enough to be familiar with it. In addition to the "meet the dog" rule, here are 10 more social rules people wish they could enforce on flights:

Be nice to flight attendants

Imagine being responsible for both the comfort and safety of 100+ people from different places with different needs in a cabin hurtling through the sky 30,000 feet above the Earth. Flight attendants deal with a wide array of people day in and day out, and we should all make sure we treat them with the kindness and respect that they deserve.

Middle seat gets the armrests

Nobody should be hogging the armrests, but if anyone has a right to them, it's the sacrificial soul who has to sit in the middle seat. (And window seat controls the window, in case that's not common sense.)

headphones, flight, courtesy, airplane etiquette, flying No matter your age, headphones to listen to things on a flight are a must.Photo credit: Canva

Headphones, please

No one wants to listen to your video but you. Imagine if everyone listened to movies or YouTube videos or whatever without headphones—total social chaos. In public and on planes, use headphones to listen or watch something.

No 'manspreading'

We all know the legroom on flights has become practically non-existent, and for people with long legs it can be hard to not bang your knees up against the seat in front of you. But spreading your legs apart so wide that it infringes on other people's leg space just isn't cool. We're all in the same boat, so we have to respect one another's space.

Keep your shoes and socks on

There may be an exception here for long-haul flights as long as you keep your socks on and don't have stinky feet, but bringing a pair of slippers or something is still courteous. But definitely keep your socks on and be aware that you might not be able to tell if your own feet smell.

flying, flights, airplane, overhead bin, flight etiquette One overhead bag per passenger until everyone's got their luggage settled. Photo credit: Canva

Don’t put a second bag or a jacket in the overhead bin until everyone has put their first bag in

Overhead space is limited, so wait until everyone has had a chance to get their carry-on into that space before adding more than your one bag to it. Once everyone's settled in, feel free to add whatever overflow you have.

Try not to fart

We've all been on a flight where someone let one rip and made everyone's eyes water. Unless you have zero choice in the matter, refrain from dropping gas bombs on your fellow passengers. We're all human and humans fart, but an airplane cabin is a tight spot where people can't get away. At least take it to the lavatory if you can.

Be aware of smells in general

Come clean and fresh, but not perfumed. Deodorant? Yes, please. Strong cologne or perfume? No. Food that emits a strong odor? Also no.

flight attendant, safety presentation, airplane safety, seatbelts, courtesy Even if you know it by heart, please don't talk during the safety demonstration.Photo credit: Canva

Stay quiet during the safety demonstration

Some people fly all the time and could recite the safety demonstration spiel by heart, but that doesn't mean everyone is familiar with it. It only takes a few minutes and first-time flyers need to hear it. It's respectful to the flight attendants to not talk through their presentation and courteous to other passengers who need to listen.

Remain seated until it’s your row’s turn to deplane

On most flights, as soon as the plane arrives at the gate and the seatbelt sign is turned off, people rush to stand up and gather their luggage. But it's always going to take several minutes to even start getting the first passengers off the plane, and it's not going to go any faster to crowd into the aisle.

If we all follow these "rules," flying can be a more pleasant experience for everyone—even our good doggo friends who might be on board.

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Gen Xers share 17 nostalgic dishes they ate growing up—and still make for dinner

From sloppy joes to pizza bread, these dishes still slap.

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Image via Reddit

A family enjoys dinner during the 1970s.

Generation X (those born between 1965-1980) grew up eating classic Americana meals. During the 1970s, comfort meals like tuna casserole and salmon roquettes were popular meals.

Gen X also grew up eating some pretty unhinged (but all the more yummy) sandwiches. These meals are steeped in childhood nostalgia.

And to this day, Gen Xers are still fond of their favorite dishes they grew up eating. Together, they discussed on Reddit their most-loved home-cooked dishes that they still whip up, starting with sloppy joes.

Here are 17 iconic Gen X comfort meals to keep in mind the next time you make dinner:


@genx_shawn

🤤😂 Top 10 Things ONLY GenX Knows the Taste Of... #genx #over50club #genxtiktok #over40 #genxcrew #generationx #genxers #genxtok #over40club #over50

"Breakfast. We will have a 'breakfast for dinner' at least a couple times a month. Yum!" - fadeanddecayed, KddKc

"Pizza bread! My mom would cut Italian bread into pieces, put butter and garlic salt on them, then pour some spaghetti sauce on them, cover with mozzarella cheese, and broil for like ten or fifteen minutes. Super easy and quick to make and so tasty. I'm sure my mom loved that I was so into something that took roughly zero effort for her to make." - hornybutired

"Grilled cheese and soup." - reincarnateme

"Meat loaf. I use 2 pounds ground beef, replace bread crumbs with minute rice, add 1 pkg beef soup flavoring, chop an entire onion for it, and mix BBQ sauce into mixture. Oh, important: do not overmix! Place all ingredients into bowl, then mix quickly 10 or 12 swirls of a large spoon. Grease loaf pan, carefully place mixture in, pat down & bake about an hour. (Extra info: for even better flavor, mix the night before, pat into loaf pan, cover with plastic, put into fridge overnight. Remove from fridge about an hour before baking. BE SURE TO REMOVE PLASTIC WRAP! [Esp. If in Pyrex glass loaf pan])" - jehardt, AbbyM1968

"White guy tacos." - najing_ftw

"Skillet dinner. Kielbasa, bell pepper, onion, spuds in a cast iron pan. One dish. Easy peasy." - UnimportantOutcome67

- YouTube www.youtube.com

"Chicken pot pie or chicken ala king." - sattersnaps

"Fried catfish, greens, and red beans and rice." - User Unknown

"Shepherds pie, technically cottage pie if it’s ground beef. Homemade enchiladas, usually made as a layered casserole instead because I don’t have time to roll them. Pork chops with mashed potatoes and veggies." - XerTrekker

"Fried rice with chicken or pork leftovers." - AlternativeResort181

"Hot hamburgers: hamburger patty open face on Texas toast thickness bread, cover with fries then cover that with brown gravy. Wife's variation is hamburger patty over rice with brown gravy." - EnricoMatassaEsq

@past_archives

American Gen X Foods That Kids Today Can’t Understand#nostalgia #childhoodmemories #backtochildhood #90s #2000s #usa #80s #90skids #80schildhood #capcutforus #capcut #capcutpioneer #America

"Stuffed peppers. I make it much more easily by cooking it all in one large frying pan 'deconstructed'. Sauté onions garlic and ground beef, add cut up peppers, tomatoes or tomato sauce, sometimes a little spinach, then add separately cooked rice, salt and pepper and serve. It comes together pretty quickly and tastes just as good as stuffing and baking peppers in the oven." - Affectionate-Map2583

"Macaroni and cheese with cut up hot dogs. Seriously, that’s what I ate tonight." - Dazzling-Walrus9673

"Homemade Stroganoff casserole. Ridiculously easy to make. Ingredients:

1.25-1.5 lbs. Ground Beef
1 each of large white onion, green pepper, and red pepper
1 can mushroom pieces, drained and rinsed
12 oz. Bag of wide egg noodles
1 can cream of mushroom soup
16 oz. Sour cream
Worcestershire Sauce
Louisiana Hot Sauce
White or Black Pepper
Panko bread crumbs

To Make: Preheat oven to 360 degrees. Worcestershire, hot sauce, garlic powder, and pepper are all to taste, depending on how much flavor and punch you want it to have. Cook noodles per instructions. Drain. Peel and slice onion (not diced), core and cut peppers into strips Brown meat, onions and peppers along with liberal amount of Worcestershire; garlic, pepper, and hot sauce. Add mushrooms. Cook until meat is fully brown, onions are translucent and peppers are tender. Drain. Combine drained meat, etc. with whole can of soup, half of the sour cream. Gradually add noodles into the mix. Add sour cream as needed to maintain consistency. Add Worcestershire, hot sauce, and pepper to taste. Dump into large, deep Corning dish or whatever. Cover too with bread crumbs. Cover and bake for forty minutes." - CynfullyDelicious

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Fourth grade teacher beautifully explains what grief is to her students using a vase

"Grief takes up space, not just in your heart, but in your brain."

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Images courtesy of Instagram/@miss.brazil_28 (used with permission)

Fourth grade teacher Miss Ryan Brazil explains what grief is to her students using a vase.

Grief is a universal experience that touches everyone—from kids to adults. And for fourth grade teacher Ryan Brazil, she used her own recent loss to help educate and open up to her students about grief.

In a touching video, Brazil tenderly explained what grief is to her students after they finished reading A Kids Book About Grief by Brennan C. Wood. She tells her class, "More than half our class is in tears and is being vulnerable and brave and sharing stories of their own grief."

She then pulls out an empty vase that she explains represents her "brain and her heart," before adding: "I normally have more space for patience, focus, and calm. I showed them how little things that happen during the day like noise, questions, mistakes are like colorful pom poms filling up the vase. Normally, there’s plenty of space to handle those things."

However, due to grief, she added that she has less space—and put a crumpled up piece of black construction paper in the vase to demonstrate the space grief can occupy in a person's heart and mind. "It can make you more tired, less patient, and quicker to feel overwhelmed. I wanted my students to understand that if I seemed off lately, it wasn’t about them. It’s just my brain and heart are doing a lot of extra work right now," she added in the video caption. "It turned into one of the most healing moments I’ve ever had in my classroom."

Brazil tells Upworthy that the lesson deeply impacted not just her students, but herself. "My sister passed away recently and very unexpectedly, so I’ve been having a difficult time. I was feeling overwhelmed and in pain, and I needed a way to discuss what was happening in my brain and my heart," Brazil says.

So, she decided to share with her students rather than hide. "Discussing grief with my students changed something in our classroom. So many kids opened up about their own losses," she says. "Some were more recent and some were before they were born, but they were still hurt by them. There was this release of emotions that felt like they were probably holding on to those feelings for a long time. We really rallied around each other and were there for each other. It was really helpful for me, personally. I felt understood in that moment and part of a community."

She hopes that her video will encourage others (including educators) to open up to students. "I am not an expert (on most things, honestly), but I don’t think that’s what kids need," she adds. "They don’t need us to be perfect, they just need us to give them space to feel and understand that feelings are welcome. We all learned that grief isn’t something to hide. It’s something we can learn to hold onto together."

Expert tips for how to teach kids about grief

Looking for more ways to explain what grief is to your kids? These are five tips from grief experts to help.

Name the feelings, not just the loss

"Kids often mirror our emotions but don’t always have the words for them. Instead of avoiding words like sad or angry, model using them out loud: 'I’m feeling sad today because I miss Grandpa'," Angie Hanson, a certified grief coach, educator, and author of Chapters of a Resilient Heart, tells Upworthy. "This helps kids name and normalize their own emotions. Grief becomes less scary when it’s spoken about openly."

Tip #2: Use simple, honest language

"It is commonplace to use words like 'passed away' or 'lost' when talking about death, but these words can be confusing and add to misconceptions and anxiety for young children," Jessica Correnti, MS, Certified Child Life Specialist at Kids Grief Support and author of The ABCs of Grief, tells Upworthy. "It is recommended to use concrete, factual words like 'death,' 'died,' and 'dying' even though these may feel blunt or difficult to say. Grief is a small word, but a very confusing and layered experience."

Create a “heart space” ritual

"Like the vase activity, give grief a visual home. Create a small jar or box called a heart space," says Hanson. "When they miss someone, they can place drawings, notes, or keepsakes inside. This teaches them that love doesn’t disappear, it changes form, and it’s okay to keep that connection."

Keep grief in the conversation, not just the moment

"Children revisit grief as they grow. Keep their loved one’s memory woven into everyday life," says Hanson. "Bake their favorite cookies, tell stories, or say, 'I wonder what Grandma would think of this.' It shows that grief isn’t a one-time event but an ongoing expression of love and remembrance."

Recognize that you may be grieving too

"It is important for adults to have trusted spaces and people to confide in about their grief reactions so they can be present and available for their child(ren)," Dr. Micki Bruns, Ph.D., a childhood bereavement experts and CEO of Judi's House/JAG Institute, a childhood bereavement center in Denver, Colorado, tells Upworthy. "At the same time, adults should normalize grief reactions and model healthy coping."

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20 common names that never existed until a writer created them

Without Shakespeare, we'd never have Jessica.

baby names, baby girl names, baby boy names, unqiue baby names, authors, books
Photo credit: Canva

Authors are the OG baby name influencers.

We know names like Katniss, Daenerys, Arwen, and Atticus come from fantastic works of fiction. But what’s surprising is how many ordinary, everyday names we use now were once just as made up.

In fact, some of the most familiar names in the world—Jessica, Fiona, Vanessa, and Holden, for instance—didn’t exist at all until an author invented them.

And with the recent boom in literary baby names, it’s fun to look back at the authors who dreamed up monikers we all recognize and appreciate.

The Bard, of course, has quite a few notables.

Shakespeare, writer, the bard, writing, names William Shakespeare media2.giphy.com

Is it any surprise that the wordsmith who brought us words like "radiance," “marathon” and “bubble” would also invent not one, not two, but three enduring female names? We think not.

Shakespeare first used "Jessica" in The Merchant of Venice (1596), likely inspired by a biblical name, Iscah. The name remained rare for centuries, only skyrocketing in the late 20th century, reigning as the most popular girls’ name in America from 1985 to 1995.

He also gave us Olivia, debuting her as the charming noblewoman in Twelfth Night. The name didn’t appear in any records before Shakespeare wrote it, and it’s now one of the top five girls’ names in the world.

And while not invented by him, Miranda (derived from the Latin mirandus, meaning “worthy of admiration.”) owes its popularity to Shakespeare’s heroine in The Tempest.

Romantics, poets, and Victorians also made their contribution.

baby names, baby girl names, baby boy names, unqiue baby names, authors, books Oscar Wilde media3.giphy.com

Throughout the centuries, literary minds have been busy coining names that would stand the test of time.

  • Pamela came from poet Philip Sidney’s Arcadia (1593), combining Greek roots meaning “all sweetness.” It later became a moral heroine’s name in Samuel Richardson’s Pamela, or Virtue Rewarded.
  • Vanessa was Jonathan Swift’s clever blend of his friend Esther Vanhomrigh’s name…a mashup that became timeless.
  • Cedric first appeared in Sir Walter Scott’s Ivanhoe (1819), inspired by an Old English misreading of “Cerdic.”
  • Cosette, from Les Misérables, was Victor Hugo’s affectionate invention, likely derived from Colette.
  • Dorian. Before it was the titular character in Oscar Wilde’s The Picture of Dorian Gray (1890), it was the name of a tribe from ancient Greece. Wilde’s haunting protagonist cemented Dorian as a first name, especially for boys, and gave it that elegant, slightly mysterious sheen it still carries.
  • Lorna, the star of R.D. Blackmore’s Lorna Doone (1869), carried a sense of mystery and romance that made it a favorite for decades.
  • Lucinda, invented by Cervantes for Don Quixote as an alternative to Lucy, which later charmed Molière’s stage.
  • Evangeline, coined by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow in his 1847 poem, which blended Greek roots meaning “good news.”
  • Fiona sounds ancient Celtic, but was actually coined by Scottish writer William Sharp (late 1800s), who used “Fiona Macleod” as a pen name to give his Celtic tales an air of authenticity. A Victorian literary invention disguised as folklore.
  • Norma originated in Bellini’s 1832 opera of the same name, written by poet Felice Romani. It is not, in fact, the female version of “Norman.”
  • Thelma was created by novelist Marie Corelli in 1887 for her bestselling Thelma: A Norwegian Princess.

Even knights and noblemen weren’t immune: Perceval, the purest of Arthur’s knights, came from a 12th-century French poem by Chrétien de Troyes.

Modern writers joined the club too.

baby names, baby girl names, baby boy names, unique baby names, authors, books Wendy from Peter Pan media1.giphy.com

Writers of the last two centuries have continued the tradition:

  • Holden came from J.D. Salinger’s Catcher in the Rye —brooding and bookish ever since.
  • Coraline was Neil Gaiman’s accidental misspelling of “Caroline,” which he decided to keep.
  • Scarlett first appeared as Scarlett O’Hara’s given name in Gone with the Wind (1936).
  • Harper, once just a surname, became a first name after To Kill a Mockingbird’s author, Harper Lee, redefined its image.
  • And of course, there’s Wendy, which J.M. Barrie’s Peter Pan (1904) transformed from a rare nickname (short for Gwendolyn) into a proper, mainstream first name.

And while names like Cedric and Fiona might feel timeless now, they were once as novel as names like Leia and Asher seem today. From Shakespeare to Suzanne Collins, creative minds from every generation end up becoming baby name influencers in some way, shape, or form.

So, whether your child’s name comes from a centuries-old poem or the latest streaming hit, you’re in good company. Who knows, maybe the next great baby name is hiding in your Netflix queue at this very moment.

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