A former QAnon believer answers all your questions about how the cult really works

How they lure people in and how he got himself out.

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ArrayPhoto credit: Photo by Ehimetalor Akhere Unuabona on Unsplash

Several years ago, you wouldn’t have known what QAnon was unless you spent a lot of time reading through comments on Twitter or frequented internet chat rooms. Now, with prominent Q adherents making headlines for storming the U.S. Capitol and elements of the QAnon worldview spilling into mainstream politics, the conspiracy theory/doomsday cult has become a household topic of conversation.

Many of us have watched helplessly as friends and family members fall down the rabbit hole, spewing strange ideas about Democrats and celebrities being pedophiles who torture children while Donald Trump leads a behind-the-scenes roundup of these evil Deep State actors. Perfectly intelligent people can be susceptible to conspiracy theories, no matter how insane, which makes it all the more frustrating.

A person who was a true believer in QAnon mythology (which you can read more about here) recently participated in an “Ask Me Anything” thread on Reddit, and what they shared about their experiences was eye-opening. The writer’s Reddit handle is “diceblue,” but for simplicity’s sake we’ll call them “DB.”

A group of people belonging to a Qanon splinter group stand in a line
Qanon splinter group | Marc Nozell | Flickr www.flickr.com


DB explained that they weren’t new to conspiracy theories when QAnon came on the scene. “I had been DEEP into conspiracy for about 8 years,” they wrote. “Had very recently been down the ufo paranormal rabbit hole so when Q really took off midterm for trump I ‘did my research’ and fell right into it.”

DB says they were a true believer until a couple of years ago when they had an experience that snapped them out of it:

It was a couple of posts made by Q on the chans that seemed highly suspicious because of how ignorant they were of technology. Q posts often had weird syntax as a kind of code

    • Kind Of [writing like this] as if there was [a secret] in using brackets To Tell The Truth.

One morning Q claimed to have shut down 7 FBI super computers (named after the seven dwarves no less) via satellite hacking and all the rabid fans ate it up, claiming that “their internet was running a little bit faster)

FBI Super Computer ::SLEEPY::[[OFFLINE]]

alarm bells went off in my head because, come on, that’s not how any of this works. Using elementary school syntax form To SpeLl a [[Secret Code ]] felt fishy, and claiming your email in rural Montana loaded faster because seven super computers got shut down by remote hacking was a bridge too far for me. I realized that most of the Q believers I had seen were Boomers with no idea how technology works or people my age with no idea how computers operate. That day, I Googled Q Anon Debunked and got out.”


Episode 1 Mind Blown GIF by The Office Giphy


If simply Googling “QAnon Debunked” were enough to get QAnoners to deprogram themselves, why don’t more of them do it? That’s the tricky part. DB explains several elements to Q belief that keeps people in it. A big part of what primed DB to accept conspiracy thinking was a fundamentalist Christian upbringing.

“Theories about evil evolution, science denial and The End of The world rapture return of Christ stuff is all pretty crazy too,” wrote DB, who moved to a more progressive version of Christianity after leaving QAnon behind. “There’s a strong link between the two.”

There’s also some “perverse comfort” in conspiracy theories like QAnon, DB wrote, “because of the false sense of order and purpose it brings to the world. Either the world is a boardgame chess match between Good and Evil forces working behind the scenes, and you might be a pawn but at least you are on The Right Side or you admit that the world is a mess, nobody is in charge, there is no grand battle of good and evil behind the scenes and your life has less purpose and order than you hoped.”

They also said overconfidence and arrogance play a big role in people staying in the QAnon world, as well as the belief that you are the one engaging in critical thinking while everyone else is a mindless sheep.

“At this point the problem isn’t Q, it’s gullible people who lack critical thinking skills and gain a massive ego boost in thinking they have secret in that the sheeple don’t know,” DB wrote.

“Worth noting, conspiracy thinking hooks the brain because it feels like critical thinking. Even though it isn’t.”

That piece right there really is key.

Turn The Page GIF by U.S. National Archives Giphy


As another user explained, the “do your own research” concept works to reinforce conspiracy theories while making people think they’re coming to conclusions on their own, thanks to the way search engines and social media algorithms work:

“The idea behind the ‘research’ is that you are more likely to believe a source if YOU stumble upon it yourself vs if I tell you -go watch this video.

So if I tell you Hillary is a lizard person, watch this video … It’s easy to watch and dismiss me as a crazy that saw a dumb video. BUT … if I tell you Hillary is a lizard person, but don’t take my word for it – google it yourself…. and you come across hundreds of videos and articles about Hillary being a lizard person – that makes it all the more believable. Especially since there’s so many articles saying Hillary is NOT a lizard person. If it wasn’t true, why would people be making videos and articles ‘debunking’ it?

And the debunk articles are appearing higher in searches than the articles saying she is. Why is that? Is big tech in on it to ….and you see where this is going.

So their ‘research’ is just a way of manipulating people.”

DB shared that it was hard to admit that they’d been played by a baseless conspiracy theory. “It’s NOT easy realizing you’ve been conned, been a rube, been taken in,” they wrote. “It was massively humbling to realize I’d been a sucker.”

However, they are also surprised to see how much “crazier” QAnon has gotten, as when they left a couple of years ago they were “certain it would all be over soon.” They weren’t a “storm the Capitol” kind of believer, but rather a “snicker quietly to myself in my bedroom because those sheeple don’t know the truth” type.

DB explained that they keep themselves away from the edge of the rabbit hole now by embracing doubt and different ideas and have added “some fucking worldview humility” to their life.

“The problem with fundamentalist religions, cults, and conspiracy theories is they all demonize doubt and are all so absolutely certain that they have the total truth of reality figured out. I hold my beliefs much more humbly now, I acknowledge that I could be wrong,” they wrote.

“I read more widely and expose myself to the ideas of others, so that I don’t end up in an echo chamber.”

As for how to help others get out? DB said that arguing with a QAnon adherent, especially online, is a waste of time—and their simple explanation for why makes perfect sense:

“I don’t think they can be reasoned out of beliefs they were not reasoned into.”

There’s no way to rationalize with irrational beliefs, unfortunately. DB suggests if you have loved ones who’ve fallen down the rabbit hole that you maybe try asking them questions using Street Epistemology techniques (which you can read about here), avoid confronting and trying to reason with them (because it’s simply not effective), and continue loving them (while setting boundaries about what you’re willing to listen to) so they have a stable place to land if and when they are able to extricate themselves.

You can read the entire Reddit thread of Q and A here.

As frustrating as it is to see people we know fall for kooky conspiracy theories, seeing that it’s possible for someone to get out offers a ray of hope that they aren’t necessarily gone for good.

This article originally appeared four years ago.

  • Professor breaks down how a PhD differs from a master’s degree in layman’s terms
    Graduation is a time to celebrate, whatever your degree.Photo credit: Canva

    Have you ever wondered what the real difference is between a master’s degree and a PhD is, but felt like it would be dumb to ask? You’re not alone, and it’s not a dumb question at all. Despite what many might think, a PhD (or doctoral degree) is not a more advanced master’s degree.

    In fact, as college professor Dr. Ari explains, a PhD and a master’s degree have fundamentally different purposes.

    “Getting a master’s and a PhD are very different from each other,” she says in a TikTok video. “When someone says, ‘Maybe I should just keep going and get my PhD,’ I kind of immediately know that they don’t really understand the difference.”

    @arisofficehours

    A PhD is not just “more classes.” It’s training to become a knowledge producer, not just a knowledge consumer. #highered #highereducation #edutok #tiktoklearningcampaign #learnontiktok

    ♬ original sound – Dr. Ari’s Office Hours

    Master’s = learning. PhD = producing.

    “A master’s program is about learning knowledge. A PhD program is about producing knowledge,” Dr. Ari goes on. “In a master’s, you take classes, you complete assessments and assignments, you prove you understand existing research, maybe you write a thesis or do a comprehensive exam. In a PhD, your classes are the easy part. Your real job is to identify a ‘gap’ in the literature. You design a study, you defend it to a bunch of experts, and you contribute something new to your field (theoretically).”

    Perhaps the clearest way to explain the difference is through what Dr. Ari says about what each degree asks of the person earning it:

    “A master’s program asks, ‘Do you understand what we already know?’ And a PhD asks, ‘Can you expand what humanity already knows about this thing?’”

    A PhD program tends to be all-consuming

    Dr. Ari also explains the lifestyle difference between the degrees. Master’s degree candidates are generally balancing work and family life along with their program requirements. It’s certainly not easy, but expectations are even higher for PhD candidates.

    “PhD program, especially funded ones, really expect you to be all in, all the time,” says Dr. Ari. “Research, conferences, publishing, teaching. It’s a little different for each discipline, but for the most part, it’s the same.”

    Most people understand that getting a PhD is harder than getting a master’s degree, but it’s not just simply about there being more or harder classes. It’s really a fundamental difference in what you are doing: consuming knowledge vs. producing it.

    Can you get a PhD without a master’s degree?

    Many of us think of the degrees in the U.S. college system as a hierarchy—associate’s, bachelor’s, master’s, PhD, in that order. But thinking of them purely as rungs to climb on a ladder is a bit of a misnomer, as it ignores the differences in the degrees’ purposes.

    In many cases, you can get a PhD without ever getting a formal master’s degree, just as many people get a bachelor’s without getting a separate associate’s degree first. (And, of course, there are niche advanced degrees, like a J.D. to become a lawyer or an M.D. to become a medical doctor, which have different requirements and purposes than other doctoral degrees.)

    A PhD or doctoral degree gown for graduation
    A PhD gown usually has three stripes on the sleeve. Photo credit: Canva

    Some people pointed out that there are master’s programs that are more research-based, thus more alike in nature to a PhD. However, others who have been through a research master’s and a PhD program said they were still different.

    One thing everyone agreed on is that getting a PhD is no joke

    Here’s how people in the comments described it:

    “Fetal position crying is part of the journey of earning a PhD 😫. My master’s was a breeze compared to it.”

    “My PhD gave me PTSD.”

    “I’m almost done with my PhD and I regret it :)”

    “Just know that getting a PhD is literally academic hazing.”

    “A PhD is quite literally the highest attainable degree; it’s not something you just do. You will work. And you will nearly die. 😂”

    “I’m currently getting my Nursing PhD. No, I do not want to talk about it.”

    “Oh so this is why some professors are so strict about being called Doctors. Honestly yeah, I get it now.”

    “That’s why when I see my PhD candidate friends crashing out, I leave them be. They deserve that moment.”

    “PhD Student here. This is accurate. Funded student. I had to adjust my entire life for research. It’s worth it nonetheless…”

    Here’s to the humans who help add to our ever-expanding knowledge as a species, even when it consumes their entire life to do so.

    You can follow Dr. Ari on TikTok for more on college degrees.

  • It’s not brains or talent. Expert says high achievers have two traits anyone can learn.
    Angela Duckworth speaking at a TED event.Photo credit: via TED / YouTube

    Why is it that some people are high achievers who have a track record of success and some people never come close to accomplishing their dreams? Is it talent, luck, or how you were raised? Is it that some people are just gifted and have exceptional talents that others don’t?

    The good news is, according to psychologist Angela Duckworth, the most critical factor in being a high achiever has nothing to do with talent or intelligence. It’s how long you can keep getting back up after getting hit. She calls it “grit” and, according to Duckworth’s research, it’s the common denominator in high achievers across the board, whether it’s cadets at West Point or kids in a spelling bee. Duckworth goes into depth on the topic in her book Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance.

    What personal traits make someone successful?

    “The common denominator of high achievers, no matter what they’re achieving, is this special combination of passion and perseverance for really long-term goals,” Duckworth revealed on The Mel Robbins Podcast. “And in a word, it’s grit.”

    “Partly, it’s hard work, right? Partly it’s practicing what you can’t yet do, and partly it’s resilience,” she continued. “So part of perseverance is, on the really bad days, do you get up again? So, if you marry passion for long-term goals with perseverance for long-term goals well then you have this quality that I find to be the common denominator of elite achievers in every field that I’ve studied.”

    When pressed to define the specific meaning of grit, Duckworth responded: “It’s these two parts, right? Passion for long-term goals, like loving something and staying in love with it. Not kind of wandering off and doing something else, and then something else again, and then something else again, but having a kind of North Star.”

     

    For anyone who wants to achieve great things in life, grit is an attitude that one can develop for themselves that isn’t based on natural abilities or how well one was educated. Those things matter, of course, but having a gritty attitude is something someone can learn.

    “I am not saying that there aren’t genes at play because every psychologist will tell you that’s also part of the story for everything and grit included,” Duckworth said. “But absolutely, how gritty we are is a function of what we know, who were around, and the places we go.”

    Why grit is so important

    Grit is critical for people to become highly successful because it means that you stick with the task even when confronted with barriers. In every journey of taking an idea that you love and turning it into reality there is going to be what’s known as the dark swamp of despair—a place that you must wade through to get to the other side. It takes grit and determination to make it through the times when you fear that you might fail. If it were easy, then everyone could be high achievers.

    Grit is what keeps people practicing in their room every night as teenagers and makes them an accomplished guitar player. Grit is what makes a basketball player the first one in the gym and the last to leave so that they make the starting lineup. Grit is knocking on the next door after 12 people have just slammed their doors in your face.

    The wonderful thing about Duckworth’s work is that it presents an opportunity for everyone willing to do the work. You can no longer use the fact that you may not have specialized intelligence or a God-given talent as an excuse. All you need is perseverance and passion and you have as good a shot as anyone at achieving your dreams.

    This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

  • Experts share how to get that dreaded orange stain out of shower liners without tossing them
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    Experts share how to get that dreaded orange stain out of shower liners without tossing them

    Shower liners are like any other piece of fabric; they need to be washed. As people become more environmentally conscious, fewer plastic shower liners are ending up in the trash. Instead, people have been investing a few extra dollars into reusable shower liners, but are finding that the dreaded orange stain is still showing up…

    Shower liners are like any other piece of fabric; they need to be washed. As people become more environmentally conscious, fewer plastic shower liners are ending up in the trash. Instead, people have been investing a few extra dollars into reusable shower liners, but are finding that the dreaded orange stain is still showing up after a washing.

    The orange stain seems to start creeping up, not long after hanging the bright white liner behind your shower curtain. What is this stain, and how can you get it out without having to replace the entire liner? According to experts, the orange stain can be caused by different things, but ruling out dye from a shower curtain, the likely culprits are hard water or bacteria.

    “If you live in an area prone to hard water, then there’s a good chance that the orange stains in your shower curtains are caused by mineral buildup,” Allie Ogletree writes for Angi before later sharing the other culprit. “If your shower curtains are orange and slimy, then bacteria called Serratia marcescens could be the reason behind your orange shower curtains.”

    shower curtain; shower liner; get orange out; clean shower liner; shower liner cleaner
    Shower curtain with visible mold spots. Photo credit: Canva

    While hard water is more of an annoyance than a health hazard, an orange stain caused by bacteria may be a bigger concern, making it a priority to keep it off your shower liner.

    The Cleveland Clinic notes that this particular bacteria, often found on shower curtains, can cause unpleasant health issues. They write, “Serratia marcescens is bacteria that sometimes causes infections, including UTIs and pneumonia. You’re at higher risk for infection if you’re in the hospital or at a long-term care facility, have a weakened immune system or a medical device in your body. S. marcescens can be hard to treat because it’s often resistant to many antibiotics.”

    Tossing the shower curtain into the washer may kill the bacteria, but it doesn’t always get the stain out. Cleaning experts have a solution.

    shower curtain; shower liner; get orange out; clean shower liner; shower liner cleaner
    Cleaning the shower with green gloves and a blue cloth. Photo credit: Canva

    Method One

    Spray down the orange parts of the liner with an enzyme stain remover spray, then soak it in OxyClean and scrub with a soft brush. Once the first few steps are done, toss it in the washing machine with a half cup of baking soda. When the washer reaches the rinse cycle, add a half cup of vinegar. According to Real Simple, following these steps will have your shower liner looking good as new.

    If you have a plastic liner, you can wash it by hand and skip a few of the steps, but you may still want to scrub any residue off with a scrub brush. Cleaning enthusiast Jeneva Aaron tells Real Simple, “You can soak a plastic liner in a baking soda and vinegar solution to remove soap residue.”

    shower curtain; shower liner; get orange out; clean shower liner; shower liner cleaner
    Woman diligently cleaning shower glass with spray and cloth. Photo credit: Canva

    Method Two

    Going back to basics just may be what works. Angi touts using a simple vinegar and water mixture on the stain, allowing it to sit for 15 minutes before scrubbing, which can do the job. But you can take it one step further by adding baking soda to a few drops of white vinegar to create a paste to spread onto the grime, then scrub off.

    According to the experts at Angi, “If your shower curtain still has discoloration after cleaning it, you can toss the shower curtain in the washing machine on the delicate setting to try to remove any remaining bacteria and then soak it in bleach to remove the orange. Just be sure to wear PPE, have good ventilation, and avoid mixing bleach and vinegar, as this creates a hazardous gas.”

    shower curtain; shower liner; get orange out; clean shower liner; shower liner cleaner
    Laundry day vibes in a cozy, tidy room. Photo credit: Canva

    How to keep the orange away

    One of the reasons bacteria builds up is due to the moisture in the bathroom, so ventilating the bathroom will help cut down on how often the liner needs to be washed. In addition to ventilating the bathroom, close the shower curtain and place it on the outside of the bathtub where it’s dry. Closing the shower curtain after getting out of the shower will allow the liner to dry completely, as it will not be folded onto itself.

    Surprisingly, there’s no need to wash the shower liner weekly to aid in keeping the bacteria from discoloring it. Cleaning experts at Real Simple say that a fabric shower curtain should be washed once every three months, as long as a shower liner is used. The liner should be washed monthly to interrupt bacterial growth.

  • Professional speaker explains how voice messages can improve public speaking skills
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    Professional speaker explains how voice messages can improve public speaking skills

    Many people are looking to improve their public speaking skills, whether for work or to feel more comfortable in social situations. While taking classes and getting advice from speech coaches can help, some people have difficulty finding either the money or the time to access professional help. But one speech expert believes you can significantly…

    Many people are looking to improve their public speaking skills, whether for work or to feel more comfortable in social situations. While taking classes and getting advice from speech coaches can help, some people have difficulty finding either the money or the time to access professional help. But one speech expert believes you can significantly improve your verbal communication skills just by using your phone.

    In a YouTube video, communication professional and speaker Vinh Giang offers a daily exercise that can help improve public speaking: sending voice messages instead of texts. Giang notes that one benefit of texting is being able to review a message before sending it to fix potential communication issues or miscues—and argues that you can do the same with voice messages.

    Recording a voice message lets you hear yourself in a low-stakes situation, with the option to re-record again and again if necessary. Each time you listen back, you can pick up on your volume, speed, clarity, and word choice and be more mindful in the next one. You’ll be able to see (well, technically hear) where you’re lacking and what to improve, whether that means fixing an issue right away or identifying exactly what you need to work on in your speech.

    Speech professionals agree voice notes help improve speaking abilities

    Other professionals in public speaking and speech therapy spoke to Upworthy about voice messages and how they can help people improve their speaking skills.

    “In the speech therapy world, the process of using voice messaging to improve public speaking would be considered a method called self-monitoring through biofeedback,” said speech pathology expert Ryann Sutera. “Rehearsing running speech through the use of recordings can help assess intelligibility, rate of speech, and word choice.”

    “Using voice memos as a low-stakes tactic to improve communication and public speaking skills is something we find helps prep our clients for media opportunities,” said public relations director Lauren Guess. “Most of our clients are on the go, and sending a voice memo back in response to the reporter’s question is a great practice for creating usable, digestible sound bites.”

    Guess said voice messages not only help communication with media outlets, but also help refine clients’ public speaking skills and sharpen their talking points.

    “We prefer this approach because we find it quickly strengthens confidence in speaking on their subject matter and enhances their ability to nail their key messages, compared to submitting quotes via email or text,” Guess said.

    Whether you want to improve your public speaking for professional reasons, like giving a presentation at work or running for political office, or to get better at conversations and connecting with friends, it might be worth recording a voice note instead of talking through your fingertips.

  • People share the new subscriptions and fees they refuse to pay before they become normal
    An angry customer complains to customer service. Photo credit: via Canva/Photos

    Remember when you bought something, you owned it and, for the most part, only paid once? These days, companies try to extract the most value from their customers by getting them to pay more by tacking on surprise fees or add-ons that function as a subscription.

    Remember when you bought software once and, if you wanted to upgrade to the latest version, you paid extra? But if you liked the old version, you kept it and it worked fine? These days, you’re forced to pay a monthly fee to use the software and are forced to pay for the upgrades whether you like them or not.

    If you’re allergic to paying additional surprise fees, don’t go to Las Vegas. These days, you’ll get hit with a hefty resort fee upon checkout. Some hotels charge you up to $50 to use the in-room mini-fridge, $60 if you want to check in early, a phone-booking fee, and the most infuriating: a $25 fee to use the silverware with room service. At a time when inflation is hitting people hard, these feel like an insult to injury.

    las vegas, nevada, welcome to vegas, vegas sign, hotels
    The Las Vegas strip. via Canva/Photos

    People are seriously fed up with being nickel-and-dimed everywhere they turn, so a Redditor asked people to share the subscription fees they’ve recently encountered that they need to “collectively refuse to pay” so they don’t become normalized. We chose some to be aware of and shared information on how you can avoid paying fees—or at least whittle the number of subscriptions you have to a bare minimum.

    1. The online convenience fee

    “I wish we could stop ‘online convenience fee’ when there is essentially no other way to pay.”

    “They shouldn’t exist anyway because paying online isn’t just more convenient for the customer— it’s more convenient for the company, too! They can cut tons of positions when no one has to open actual mail or enter checks/CC numbers manually.”

    If you’re tired of paying online convenience fees, one way to avoid them is to set up auto-pay with your bank, which often lets you bypass them. You can also pay by check. If you don’t want to waste paper by receiving a bill in the mail, you can usually print out a payment stub online and pay it that way.

    2. School lunch fees

    “Our school required us to use an app to deposit lunch money to our children’s school accounts. Each deposit cost a $2.75 ‘processing fee’ to the app itself, paid for by the parent. I started packing lunches.”

    “Yes! Our school uses this, and in addition, they cap how much you can deposit at a time, which forces you to do multiple deposits and get multiple processing fees. The cap doesn’t change if you have multiple kids either, so like every 2 months I have to do a deposit for each kid and pay separate processing fees.”

    lunch, school lunch, kids eating, lunch lady, cafeteria
    Kids eating lunch in school. via Canva/Photos

    3. Streaming services with ads

    “Subscriptions to streaming services that show ads. Big media is getting two bites of the apple.”

    “Oh, and when you pay extra for ad-free, they stop showing advertisements from outside companies, but they replace them with ads for their own services and programming.”

    Want to make sure you don’t let your subscriptions pile up unnecessarily and avoid a big squeeze on your budget? One Redditor on the thread r/LifeProTips had a great idea: write down all of your monthly subscriptions on Post-it notes and keep them in a place you look every day, like where you put your keys. As the old saying goes, out of sight, out of mind. Seeing what you’re paying for each month can help you rethink your spending.

    4. A/C repair subscription

    “We have a local heating and air conditioning company that’s rated near the best in the business. However, as the wife I found out, their business model is incredibly scummy and we’ve made other people aware of it because it’s predatory. If you call them for a checkup on your furnace or AC they have a normal fee for that… but if you need any type of repairs or anything you have to pay for that repair AND they make you sign up for a monthly fee that allows you to be a customer if you have issues moving forward. If you do not agree to this fee, they won’t fix your unit – regardless of you paying for the parts or not. It was like $45 a month.”

    5. Subscription fees for car features

    “Subscriptions for hardware features your car already has. BMW tried to charge a subscription for heated seats, and now other companies are watching.”

    “Honestly, they just need to make it a law that if the functionality is present in the finished product, they by law cannot disable it. The reason why auto manufacturers used to charge more for the higher trim packages was because there was more work involved in producing them. But now they’ve capitalized on economies of scale and figured out a way to just make all the cars identical and selectively turn off features unless you pay shakedown money to the manufacturers.”

    6. Utility add-ons

    “In the city I live in, some teledoc company has convinced them to automatically add a $7 a month charge to the electric/water bill so everyone will have access to their service. It’s automatic, so if we don’t want it, we have to have the option removed. Most people get their bills electronically and pay automatically and won’t even notice the charge. Scammers!”

    “My bank started charging a fee of $5 monthly for “undeliverable mail”. When I called to fix the prob, the security question was: What’s your address.”

    Did a service you pay for recently go up in price? Tiktoker @SavingMoneySabrina has a great way to lower your bill when you call customer service. She has a simple script to follow: “Hi, my name is [insert name]. I saw that my Internet went up about $25 this month. Unfortunately, I’m not able to afford that. So if I can’t get it down to the rate that it was last month, I’m gonna have to cancel. Is this something you can help me with?” Here’s how she does it:


    @savingmoneysabrina

    I hope this helps you save some money on your bill! Important note tho: when I say that I will “have to cancel,” I actually do mean it. Sometimes you’ll have to get close to cancelling for anything to happen. Trust the process! #howtosavemoney

    ♬ original sound – savingmoneysabrina



    7. Fees to pay your bills

    “They should just call those a ‘fee fee.’”

    “Another One Won’t Hurt fee.”

    8. Printer ink scams

    “My wife had one of those HP subscription printers, which worked fine for her needs, and her job reimbursed her for it, so it wasn’t really a problem for her. When she changed jobs, we decided to cancel the subscription because we weren’t using the printer nearly as much, thinking we’d use up the ink in the cartridges and then just buy new cartridges ourselves. NOPE. It turns out, the whole thing stops working as soon as you cancel your subscription, and you can’t buy normal ink cartridges to put in it; it only accepts the ones specifically made for the subscription service. So now we have a big plastic paperweight with mostly full ink cartridges.”

    9. Personalized pricing

    “That ‘personalized pricing’ bs they are considering. The price should be the same for everyone, everywhere, and every time from the same physical store or website. If I want to order in-store pickup from the website, it should be the same price on the shelf. If I use the website at home, in the store, or down the street from inside a competitor’s store it should be the same price. If I order online from my friend’s pc it should be the same price as ordering from my own pc. The price should be the same whether I’m using the app, the website, or the physical store, not talking about delivery fees. The entire idea that a store can change the price of an item arbitrarily to what they think YOU will pay for it compared to someone else should be absolutely illegal.”

    “Would you like to use our personal shopping assistant? Guaranteed to give you the lowest price offered to any customer! And it only costs 25% to use!”

    10. No free parking here

    “Parking fees at suburban hotels. I don’t have an issue obviously when you’re in downtown Chicago or San Francisco, but charging $20/day to park in a huge suburban hotel with a lot that holds 500 cars is obnoxious.”

    “Also, parking fees at your job. I’m a nurse in Chicago. All of the major hospitals charge us a parking fee on our paychecks. Like… I get that it’s the city and parking is limited, but the hospitals own their own lots. Why are you making me to pay to come to work? Lol.”

    motel, parking, free parking, motel fees, parking lot
    A motel parking lot. via Canva/Photos

    11. Software subscriptions

    “Back in the day, someone would write a piece of software you actually found useful, so you bought it. Later, the developer added some nice new features, you thought the upgrade was worth it, and you bought the new version. Then the next version came along with features you didn’t care about (bloatware), so you skipped it. The developer sees their income dropping and decides the solution is… a subscription.”

    If you are locked into subscription software for the next few months, be sure to flip off the auto-renewal switch on the site. If they won’t allow you to do so, then set a calendar reminder on your phone for the last month of service so you can cancel before it auto-renews for another year.

  • 1st grade teacher asked students to color their ‘favorite’ hat. She then secretly created each one for real.
    A young child colors in a design. A baby wears a pink knitted hat.Photo credit: Photo Credit: Canva

    Putting a dream into action can sometimes provide that little bit of magic children crave. So, when first grade teacher Ashley Lowry genuinely surprised her students with homemade hats based on their own designs, their reactions were super wholesome.

    Lowry, who teaches first grade at Wallace Elementary in Kelso, Washington, is always looking for new ways to get her students excited about learning. According to KGW News, her aunt, Amy Lowry, had a thoughtful idea: “What if we created our own hats?” Amy tells the news camera, “So I had seen the idea and thought, well in the middle of winter, it would be a great project.”

    So, Lowry made photocopies of the already drawn winter hats with no color. The kids were tasked with coloring in their favorite designs. Some opted for solid colors like all blue or purple. Others were drawn to colorful stripes!

    Lowry shares that some of the kids were excited just to color. “I definitely saw kids who were like really excited about patterns. So you’ll see kids that had like a nice repeating pattern.”

    Once winter break arrived, Lowry had her plan: she would take those hat drawings and sew each and every one of them for her 22 students. “I guess I didn’t realize 22 hats was going to take as long as it did, but we managed,” she shared.

    Once they were back from break, she sent the kids off to recess so she could put each perfectly wrapped, made-to-design hat in their desks. When they returned, Lowry asked, “Raise your hand if you remember doing your hat.” Many raised their hands enthusiastically.

    She then read them a book called Extra Yarn, and told them to “go to their desks and sit down.” She added, “I might do a little magic in here.” As they sat obediently at their seats she shouted, “Let’s say magic magic! Drumroll!” The children begin drumming on their desks. “Open your drawers,” she instructs.

    KGW News (@kgwnews) on Threads

    teacher, first grade, surprise, knitting, hats, art project
    Teacher surprises kids with hats of their own design. www.threads.com, KGW News, Threads

    The children excitedly do as told to uncover the gift-wrapped hats—just as they had imagined them. Delighted, some of the kids explained their design choices. “Because those are my favorite colors in the world!” one shared.

    They each try their hats on to showcase what great work has been done. Aunt Amy shared, “I was just thrilled that everybody was so excited. And it looked like they’re going to enjoy the efforts.”

    Lowry added, “They love accessories. So I can’t wait to see these hats bouncing around. I think they’ll love it and just that pride. It’s something that they made!”

    On a Threads post sharing the news story, commenters are deeply impressed with this teacher’s choice to go the extra mile. One writes, “I absolutely love this story. The children’s teacher is amazing and these young little people will remember this moment forever. We need more stories like this in the world today.”

    This Threader points out how special the teacher is for caring for these children, writing, “You can’t teach a teacher that kind of compassion and empathy for their students, it’s priceless and starts these young students with a love for education and going to school. We should all take a lesson from this teacher!”

    kids, school, first grade, arts and crafts, creativity
    A child makes a colorful craft project. Photo by Taylor Heery on Unsplash

    Another states the important and obvious, saying, “You cannot put a price on a good teacher.”

    The YouTube comments were equally supportive. “This made me tear up. Those kiddos are so excited! What a wonderful way to show them that people care about them and want them to be happy,” one shares.

    One commenter was not only impressed with the teacher’s knitting skills, they adored the creative design picks. They wrote, “I LOVE that! As a crocheter of over 50 years experience, and a knitter of considerably less time, I can very easily appreciate all the effort that went into making all those hats! I do have to say, I really liked that one little girl’s unicorn hat—even though I’m now 73, I very much like unicorns!”

  • Body language expert shares how to spot a fake smile from a real one and it’s all in the eyes
    Can you tell if a smile is real or fake?Photo credit: Canva

    Though we’ve all had to fake a smile at times, it doesn’t feel good to receive or give one. Some have gotten so good at offering fake smiles that others may begin to wonder if a person’s smile is ever genuine. To put this worry to bed, a body language expert explains the tell that can separate the genuinely happy from the passively polite.

    Vanessa Van Edwards went on TikTok to share how to tell if someone is faking their smile. Van Edwards recommends not looking at a person’s mouth when they’re smiling, but to look at the top half of their face. In the video, she explains that a genuine smile doesn’t just reveal itself in the mouth, but in the upper cheeks and eyes. A person who is genuinely smiling has a noticeable “lift” in both their upper cheeks and the outward corners of their eyes, as if those parts of the face are also smiling alongside the mouth. A fake smile is very much concentrated on moving the mouth upward with little to no change in the upper half of the face.

    @vvanedwards

    This Is How You Know A Smile Is Real!

    ♬ original sound – Vanessa Van Edwards

    “If you can’t see a real smile on the top half of the face, it’s not a real smile,” said Van Edwards.

    Van Edwards then notes that if you spot a fake smile it could be an opportunity to “dig a little deeper.”

    How should you respond to a fake smile?

    There are many reasons someone might fake a smile. While the fake is meant for deception, it’s not necessarily for malicious reasons. Maybe they want to hide their disappointment that you got the promotion and they didn’t. Maybe they don’t like the food you brought to the potluck, but they like you and want to spare your feelings. Maybe they just had a terrible day but don’t want to ruin the mood. Maybe it has nothing to do with you at all. Even with all that considered there are some folks who can still convincingly fake a smile anyway.

    “The challenge with fake smiles is the cause can be from a variety of things,” facial analysis expert Brian Galke told Upworthy. “Some people were raised in environments where they were told to have a smile on their face no matter what was going on.”

    So, how should you respond to a fake smile? There’s no true one and done answer. Everything depends on the situation and how well you know the fake smiler. If you are good friends with them, you may want to privately ask them if there’s something wrong. If there is or was, you have an opportunity to turn that fake smile into a real one. That’s not always necessary or recommended though.

    “If you do feel that someone is outright faking their smile for protection and it’s not a sales situation, then it’s okay to mention the observation,” said Galke. “Make it non-judgmental by saying things like ‘It seems like _____’ and stay away from ‘why’ questions which sound judgmental. The key is to simply mention the observation to crack the door open in case they are ready to talk.”

    A fake smile usually isn’t an intentional insult or harmful deception in most cases. It could be best to just take the fake smile as you would a regular one even if you clock it. After all, while they’re hiding something, it’s usually in the name of being polite, defusing potential tension, and overall wanting you to like them.

    if you receive a fake smile, remember it has nothing at all to do with you and everything to do with them and their mood. There have been studies, articles, and reports that say that the act of smiling, even if it’s fake, can help a person boost their mood over time. In short, the phrase “fake it ‘til you make it” applies to smiling. So, if a person throws a fake smile in your direction, it could be in the hope for it to turn into a real one the next time you see them.

    @mydaily.krystal

    Sometimes when feeling low, I like to smile to help me boost my mood ?? A #sahm #sahmlife #lowmood #depression #mentalhealthmatters

    ♬ Smile – Johnny Stimson

    “Studies show that when we smile we are seen as more confident, attractive. Smiling also releases endorphins that reduce stress and due to mirror neurons when someone else smiles we want to smile which releases our own endorphins,” said Galke.

    While knowing how to spot a fake smile can be a great tool to have, consideration is recommended with what you do with that information.

  • Professor challenges Gen Z students to answer obscure history questions using only library books
    Remember when we didn't have infinite information at our fingertips? Photo credit: Canva

    Technically speaking, Duke University professor Aaron Dinin teaches entrepreneurship. But more accurately, he teaches young people to have a healthier relationship with failure, and he does this through various oddball challenges—everything from solving a 1000-piece puzzle in six minutes to trying to beat a nine-year-old at selling cookies.

    In one recent video, Dinin’s students were tasked with answering as many obscure questions as possible using nothing but the books in their library. Yes, just like back in the day.

    After tossing their phones into a box, students were given a printed-out catalog of books to help them find the answers to questions like “When was Kentucky founded?” and “What makes Pickett’s Charge important?”

    Many Gen Zers admitted this was the first time they had ever looked something like this up in a book. Dinin quipped that, to them, the whole experience must have felt like “time travel.” He also clearly enjoyed watching students come up exhausted, saying, “This is what research used to look like. This is why my PhD was so hard!”

    And yet, the students managed. One even learned how to use an index, aka an “underrated piece of technology.”

    Watch:

    As Dinin pointed out, anyone these days, not just Gen Zers, would almost certainly just Google this kind of information. And because of that, “being able to answer questions isn’t nearly as valuable in the modern world as knowing which questions are worth chasing in the first place,” which is perhaps an even bigger takeaway for students than learning how to use a library.

    Down in the comments, parents and fellow teachers alike couldn’t wait to try the exercise out on their own kiddos.

    “This is awesome and I will be showing this to my 11 year old who was beside himself when I took away his iPad and gave him a physical dictionary to double check his ELA homework.”

    gen z, aaron dinan, failure, chatgpt, college, entrepreneurship, library, research, learning how to research, books
    A boy drawing on an iPad. Photo credit: Canva

    “This is brilliant! I need to do this with my middle schoolers!”

    “What a GREAT experience! It’s like Escape Room, library edition!”

    Others were simply grateful for the trip down memory lane.

    “Thank you for sharing this! I remember to actually looking for info for any research paper in like an encyclopedia Britannica “

    “Is it nerdy to say that I actually had fun researching this way back in college (even though it was laborious)?!? Gen Xer here…”

    On his website, Dinin shared that he was inspired to create learning opportunities like this after spending two decades “watching brilliant students sabotage their futures because they were scared to be wrong.” He knew that, in order to combat that, he’d need to design classes that “make failure survivable (and maybe even a little bit fun),” rather than “chase success.”

    And this is truly a great example of that. In our fear of failure, our enmeshment with experience, and our reliance on having knowledge at our fingertips, we run the risk of forfeiting autonomy and resilience. There is always a balance to strike, but doing so requires the willpower to ignore the alluring siren song of convenience. Perhaps in this day and age, that kind of willpower is one of the most valuable skills teachers can bestow on their students.

    Follow along for even more of Dinin’s fun videos here.

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