Millennial mom gets real about 'absent boomers' who won't make time for their grandkids
They always seem to have time for vacations. Grandkids? Not so much.

A stressed millennial mom and her parents.
The baby boomer generation is often called the "Me Generation" because after the social upheaval of the β60s, they began to focus on themselves, prioritizing wealth accumulation, personal growth, self-help programs, and fitness. Now that baby boomers are grandparents, some millennials arenβt too happy that the Me Generation has taken that ethos into their golden years.
Although itβs important not to paint every generation member with the same brush, many older millennial parents feel that their baby boomer parents, known for being the least involved in recent history, are acting the same way as grandparents. Mother Phyllis, a popular TikToker with much to say about boomer grandparents, recently shared a video about how her parents live 40 minutes away and put very little effort into being grandparents, but brag about how much they love their grandchildren on social media.
The crux of Phyllisβ point is that older millennials had grandparents involved in their lives, but their parents donβt have the same dedication.
@motherphyllis Can anyone else relate?????? I shouldβve said absent grandmotherβs not grandparents but yβall know what I mean π€£ #fyp #fypγ· #fypage #viral #fyp #viral #millennial #boomer #momlife #mom #sahm #funny @laneige_us
βMy mom comes over for her yearly visit and snaps a picture of the kids. Or sometimes she doesn't even do that. She'll just take a picture off my Facebook page, post it to her Facebook page, and say, 'I love hanging out with my grandkids so much,'" Phillis says in a video with over 200,000 views. βThey're so amazing. And then her friends comment and say, βBeing a grandparent is so amazing, it's just so great.ββ Phyillis adds that when she had a child, her boomer parents didnβt show much interest in helping after her birth, saying that helping out was her husband's job.

The post resonated with many people in the comments who are having the same struggles with their boomer parents. "Their parents raised us. They didnβt even want to be parents, so theyβre sure as hell not gonna be grandparents," Kim wrote. "I mean, you think having boomer grandparents are bad, try having them raise you. Generation X basically raised ourselves because theyβre busy," Queen added.
A big reason why parents like Phyliis feel betrayed by their parents for refusing to be involved in their childrenβs lives is that they probably had grandparents who were involved in theirs. Many older millennials and Gen Xers had grandparents involved in their upbringing, providing daycare, babysitting, and making social visits, because their grandmothers were raised to be homemakers and didnβt have jobs. So their lifestyle was more geared to taking care of children. Boomer women were much more likely to have had careers and still work to this day.
@motherphyllis Millennials just canβt understand the way some boomers act If Iβm being honest ##fyp##foryoupage##fypγ·##fypage##mom##sahm##momlife##honest##truth##relatable##millennial##boomer##generation##millennialstothemoon##phyllis
βHereβs the thing, though: itβs statistically more likely that your own grandmothers were homemakers, at least from the time they had children,β DeeDee Moore, a grandparenting influencer, writes for Scary Mommy. βThey were home to watch you after school, or host you and your cousins for weeks during the summer. Starting with the baby boomer generation, women were more likely to be in the workforce, making babysitting grandkids and cousin camp harder to pull off.β
While parents like Phyllis have a good reason to be upset that their parents arenβt involved in their childrenβs lives, everyoneβs situation is different, so we canβt bash all boomers for being uninvolved in their grandchildrenβs lives. However, their accusation does follow a significant generational trend: Gen Xers and older Millennials, known by some as Generation Goonie, were raised in a world with very little parental involvement. So, it's unsurprising that their children have grandparents who may not be around much.
This article originally appeared in April
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Some Boomer grandparents are being called out for "gramnesia".

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