+
upworthy
Family

These 21 empowering phrases will help you survive anything.

We all have brushes with self-doubt. Hey, we're human.

And this time of year can be especially challenging in the confidence department. 'Tis the season for rich foods, fancy parties, and family members you haven't seen in months. It's easy to get bogged down in worry, judgment, comparison, and doubt.

One way to stay positive during the holidays is to incorporate mantras and affirmations into your routine.


Research from Carnegie Mellon University shows self-affirmations can improve problem-solving abilities and protect against stress.

So this holiday season, before anxiety and self-doubt creep in, give yourself a break. Take a moment to breathe deeply and repeat one or more of these phrases. Taking a moment to pause and center yourself might just be what you need to get the most out of the festivities.


1. "I don't like myself, I'm crazy about myself." — Mae West


2. It's OK to cut loose.

This is your time to relax, unwind, and celebrate the season with friends and family. If that means dancing with your cousins in the kitchen to "Hotline Bling," or eating the last piece of pie all by yourself, so be it. Dance. Laugh. Go nuts! It's your holiday season, celebrate as you see fit.

Photo via iStock.

3. "I see the perfection in all my flaws and all my genius."


4. Steer your own ship.

It's easy to be swayed by everyone else. Coming home to discover what friends and family are up to and seeing how everyone's changed can be tough. It's hard not to get bogged down in comparisons. That's why it's so important to remember that you have a say when it comes to your mood or actions.

And whether you have a great time or a miserable one depends a lot on where you steer your ship.

Photo via iStock.

5. "I will let go of what is no longer serving me and make room for what inspires me."


6. "I belong here."

You belong wherever you want to be. Even if your Aunt Kathy made an offhand comment that makes you feel small or out of place, you belong exactly where you are right now. You're not in the way, you're not a bother or a pest. You're a part of the group, and the group is better because of it.

7. You are strong.

Get back, blue. Move over, orange. Whether you're more suited to warm tones, cool shades, or neutrals, everyone looks good when they're feeling strong. If the holidays are especially draining for you, physically or mentally, don't hesitate to remind yourself just how capable you really are.

Photo via iStock.

8. "To love yourself right now, just as you are, is to give yourself heaven." — Allen Cohen


9. Everything will be OK.

Photo via iStock.

10. "This is it, this is the only body I've got." — Whitney Thompson


11. "I define my worth, and I am worthy."

Around the holidays, it's easy to let family, old friends, or even the bathroom scale define you. But you get decide who you are and what makes you unique, no one else. So let Grandma Mabel go on and on about why you should settle down already. You're the only one you need to listen to.

12. You know yourself better than anyone else.

When stressful situations arise this season, you may not always be the picture of calm and poise you always envisioned. It's important to grant yourself a little grace. You need to be kind and patient with yourself so that you can extend that same courtesy to everyone else.

Photo via iStock.

13. "Yeah, I'm fat — but I'm also all the good things that I am." — Tess Holliday

None of us are defined by any one particular attribute. Plus-size model and all-around-badass Tess Holliday did not say this to imply that being fat is bad (because, just to be clear, FAT IS NOT BAD). Fat is just one more adjective without moral value, good or bad (see: tall, short, left-handed, blue-eyed). No matter how you describe yourself, what's important is appreciating and respecting yourself for the multitude of wonderful things that you are and expecting and appreciating the same in others.

14. "What other people think of me is none of my business."


15. *nail polish emoji*

Admit it: You're really, really good. Good looking. Good natured. Kind and generous. A whiz in the kitchen and quick with a joke with a keen sense of direction. OK, OK, maybe you're not all of these things, but you're definitely filled to the brim with talent and kindness. And that's all you need to stand-up and declare your awesomeness.

Photo via iStock.

16. "I am beneath no one." — Jim Kellner

Is your older sister back from her trip around the world making knit sweaters for senior dogs in need? Did your younger brother finally invent that cure for athlete's foot? Good for them! But don't let someone else's success cloud the way you feel about yourself. There's enough love, praise, and talent to go around. Don't dim your light just so others can shine.

17. Your brain is the most powerful muscle you've got.

Photo via iStock.

18. "I choose to think thoughts that serve me well."

As Mark Twain once said, "Worrying is like paying a debt you don't owe." There's plenty to worry and stress about during the holidays, but instead of giving in to negative thinking, try to stay present and think constructive, positive thoughts.

19. Be your own BFF.

Photo via iStock.

20. "My life is unfolding beautifully."

Your life, with all of its twists, turns, and surprises, is one helluva story. And it's a really good one. So when you bump into old friends who seem to have it all figured out, remember: (a) They don't, and (b) don't let comparison and self-doubt get in the way of celebrating your successes, big or small.

21. You got this.

Photo via iStock.

This holiday season, and throughout the year, remember to take good care of yourself.

Do what feels right for you, and do your best not to worry about everyone else. As my good-friend-if-we-only-met Emma Stone once said, "You're a human being, you live once and life is wonderful, so eat the damn red velvet cupcake."

Droolworthy photo via iStock.

Family

Dad takes 7-week paternity leave after his second child is born and is stunned by the results

"These past seven weeks really opened up my eyes on how the household has actually ran, and 110% of that is because of my wife."

@ustheremingtons/TikTok

There's a lot to be gleaned from this.

Participating in paternity leave offers fathers so much more than an opportunity to bond with their new kids. It also allows them to help around the house and take on domestic responsibilities that many new mothers have to face alone…while also tending to a newborn.

All in all, it enables couples to handle the daunting new chapter as a team, making it less stressful on both parties. Or at least equally stressful on both parties. Democracy!

TikTok creator and dad Caleb Remington, from the popular account @ustheremingtons, confesses that for baby number one, he wasn’t able to take a “single day of paternity leave.”

This time around, for baby number two, Remington had the privilege of taking seven weeks off (to be clear—his employer offered four weeks, and he used an additional three weeks of PTO).

The time off changed Remington’s entire outlook on parenting, and his insights are something all parents could probably use.

Keep ReadingShow less
Photo by Bambi Corro on Unsplash

Can flying to college twice a week really be cheaper than renting?

Some students choose to live at home while they go to college to save money on living expenses, but that's generally only an option for families who live in college towns or cities with large universities where a student can easily commute.

For University of British Columbia student Tim Chen, that "easy commute" is more than 400 miles each way.

Twice a week, Chen hops on a flight from his home city of Calgary, flies a little more than an hour to Vancouver to attend his classes, then flies back home the same night. And though it's hard to believe, this routine actually saves him approximately $1,000 a month.

Keep ReadingShow less

Tony Trapani discovers a letter his wife hid from him since 1959.

Tony Trapani and his wife were married for 50 years despite the heartache of being unable to have children. "She wanted children,” Trapani told Fox 17. "She couldn't have any. She tried and tried." Even though they endured the pain of infertility, Tony's love for his wife never wavered and he cherished every moment they spent together.

After his wife passed away when Tony was 81 years old, he undertook the heartbreaking task of sorting out all of her belongings. That’s when he stumbled upon a carefully concealed letter in a filing cabinet hidden for over half a century.

The letter was addressed to Tony and dated March 1959, but this was the first time he had seen it. His wife must have opened it, read it and hid it from him. The letter came from Shirley Childress, a woman Tony had once been close with before his marriage. She reached out, reminiscing about their past and revealing a secret that would change Tony's world forever.

Keep ReadingShow less
Internet

Man goes out of his way to leave tip for a server after realizing he grabbed the wrong receipt

Instead of just brushing it off and moving on, the man wrote out a note explaining what happened with a sincere apology along with a $20 cash tip and delivered it to the restaurant.

Man goes out of his way to leave forgotten tip for server

Being in the service industry can be hard. People have to spend long hours on their feet, deal with repetitive movements that can create pain and sometimes interact with not so nice customers. When you rely on tips for survival on top of everything else, it can feel like a bit of a gut punch when someone decides not to leave you one despite how good your service was.

One customer must've realized the disappointment that can occur after not receiving a tip when serving tables because he went out of his way to give one. In a post shared on Reddit, a customer revealed in a letter that he realized he took the wrong receipt after leaving. Instead of taking the blank one, he took the merchant's copy which holds the tip amount and his signature.

The error was discovered when he was checking his bank account and saw the amount taken off of his card was not the amount he expected. That's when he decided to check the receipt from that day and saw the error.

Keep ReadingShow less
Science

Scientists have finally figured out how whales are able to 'sing' underwater

The physical mechanism they use has been a mystery until now.

Baleen whales include blue, humpback, gray, fin, sei, minke whales and more.

We've long known that baleen whales sing underwater and that males sing in tropical waters to attract females for mating. What we haven't known is how they're able to do it.

When humans make sound underwater, we expel air over through our vocal chords and the air we release rises to the surface as bubbles. But baleen whales don't have vocal chords, and they don't create bubbles when they vocalize. Toothed whales, such as sperm whales, beaked whales, dolphins and porpoises, have an organ in their nasal passages that allows them to vocalize, but baleen whales such as humpback, gray and blue whales don't.

Whales are notoriously difficult to study because of their size and the environment they require, which is why the mechanism behind whale song has remained a mystery for so long. It's not like scientists can just pluck a whale out of the ocean and stick it in an x-ray machine while it's singing to see what's happening inside its body to create the sound. Scientists had theories, but no one really knew how baleen whales sing.

Now, thanks to researchers at the University of Denmark, that mystery has been solved.

Keep ReadingShow less

You can learn a lot by alayzing faces.

There are countless situations in life where we have to figure out how someone really feels, but they have a good poker face that keeps their feelings well-hidden. According to body language expert Terry Vaughan even the most deceptive people in the world have a tell: the left and right sides of their face don’t usually match.

So, which side do we believe? Vaughan says the left.

“The reason this is a powerful hack is because the left side of the face is more likely to reveal the ‘true emotion’ or the ‘dominant’ emotion if there’s a mix,” Vaughan says. The reason? “The right hemisphere of our brain does more heavy lifting in dealing with processing emotions. The left hemisphere…is a little more analytical or ‘strategic.’”

Keep ReadingShow less