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03.26.14
Health
How do you end a conversation with someone who won't stop talking? 19 people share their tricks.
We all know someone who talks too much.
06.22.22
via Pexels
Three people engaged in conversation at a party.
There are some people who live under the illusion that everything they say is deeply interesting and have no problem wasting your time by rambling on and on without a sign of stopping. They’re the relative, neighbor or co-worker who can’t take a hint that the conversation is over.
Of all these people, the co-worker who can’t stop talking may be the most challenging because you see them every day in a professional setting that requires politeness.
There are many reasons that some people talk excessively. Therapist F. Diane Barth writes in Psychology Today that some people talk excessively because they don’t have the ability to process complex auditory signals, so they ramble on without recognizing the subtle cues others are sending.
It may also be a case of someone who thinks they’re the most interesting person in the conversation.
For others, it’s a symptom of a disorder. Michelle C. Brooten-Brooks, a licensed marriage and family therapist, writes that excessive talking can also be a symptom of, among other things, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder or anxiety.
“Anxiety can cause someone to speak excessively,” Brooten-Brooks writes at Very Well Health. “While many with social anxiety may avoid social interactions, some may inadvertently talk excessively when in social situations out of nervousness and anxiety.”
So what do we do when we're stuck in a situation where someone just keeps talking? A Reddit user by the name of Spritti33 asked for some advice about how to “politely end a conversation with a person who won't stop talking” and received some very practical and funny responses from members of the online forum.
A lot of folks pointed out that it’s not impolite to walk away from a person who is incessantly talking because they are being rude by disrespecting your time. Others shared how, in some cultures, there are ways of shutting down a conversation while allowing both parties to save face.
Here are 19 of the best responses to Spritti33's question, “How does someone politely end a conversation with a person who won't stop talking?”
1.
"In Flanders we have a word for it, 'bon,' and then you say something 'I have work to do,' 'It's time to go home,' 'It's time to get drinks.' And people realize the other person wants to leave without being mean," — ISuckAtRacingGames
2.
"In Ireland we do like a little clap/slap our thigh/clap the person's shoulder and say 'Right! Shur look, I'll let you go...' as if we're being polite and letting the other person off the hook, but actually, it's like get me the fuck out of here haha!" —funky_mugs
3.
"If they keep talking over polite cues, I have found there really isn’t a polite way to exit the conversation," — Binder_Grinder
4.
"This is so true. People that do this don't care whether you're into the conversation or not, they're talking simply because they want to. I've gotten better at just interjecting (even mid-sentence if I've already tried everything else) with, 'I'm sorry, I have to go. (start walking away at this point) It was nice talking to you.' Don't give any excuses or reasons for leaving, just do it otherwise they'll try to talk about your reasons." — PSSaalamader
5.
"As a teacher, I have learned how to interrupt people who do not leave any pauses when they’re speaking: start nodding and verbally agreeing with them, 'Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh…' You can’t interrupt these people, but you can start agreeing while they speak, then raise your voice and say, 'Yeah, wow, excuse me but I must go,'" — Janicegirlbomb2
6.
"Remember that it is them who is being impolite by talking incessantly about things of no interest to their audience," — Orp4mmws99
7.
"Source: am a therapist. What you do is recap their last story and in the same breath add a goodbye.
I.e. 'Sounds like you guys found a bunch of great deals at the mall, that’s awesome! Thanks for meeting with me, you’ll have to tell me more next time we run into each other. It was great to catch up!'" — pikcles-for-fingers
8.
"Just start coughing these days it'll clear a whole room in seconds," — Sinisterpigeon
9.
"People who are like this expect folks to just walk away from them while they are talking because that’s the only way the conversation ends. It’s not rude to them, it’s normal. So, it’s entirely okay to say, 'all right this has been great, see you later,' and then just walk away smiling," — Underlord_Fox
10.
"If you can practice this, start to train one of your eyeballs to slowly drift off whilst the other eye remains locked on theirs. That should do the trick," — The-Zesty-Man
11.
"At 62, I just walk away. My bullshit filter has disappeared," -- Negative_Increase
12.
"You gotta realize that everyone else they talk to just walks away. They’re used to that. They think a conversation is you just talk at someone til they walk away. It’s not weird to them," — DelsmagicFishies
13.
"I don't know why some people are so afraid of this. It is not rude. You don’t need to lie. 'We can speak more other time. Goodbye,' is fine," — Kooky-Housing3049
14.
"On a more serious note, I typically do an 'oh shit' type of face like I've just remembered I had something important scheduled. I say 'Sorry, what time is it? check the time Ah crap, I hate to cut you off but if I don't head out now I'm going to be late for ____.' Then I scurry away like I'm really in a rush. If you're in a situation where you can't straight up leave, I swap 'gotta head out' for 'I told someone I'd call them at [time] and they're waiting on my call' and then make a fake phone call," — teethfairie
15.
"'Wow, you have a lot of opinions about this subject...' and then never stop angling the conversation back to how weird it is that they're still talking," — Ordsmed
16.
"Had a friend who would put his hand gently on your shoulder and kindly say, 'I love you , but I just don't care, good (night/day),'" -- Think-Passage-5522
17.
"While not exactly polite, my Aunt Sophie had a great way of ending a conversation. When the monologue got too much she would nod her head like she was listening and then at the slightest pause she would go, 'The end.' And walk away.
She mostly did it with kids who didn’t realize they were yabbering on about Thundercats too long. (It was me, I was yabbering on about Thundercats too long.)" — theslackjaw727
18.
"Change your stance, instead of facing them head on turn 90° your body language will end the conversation quickly without being rude," — Zedd2087
19.
"Where possible, I've always found it best to tell these people up front that you have somewhere to be 15, 30, 45, etc minutes from now. If that's not realistic, I've found that if you can usually find a gap to say you need to run if you focus on doing only this for 3-5 minutes," — Pretend_Airline2811
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Democracy
Patagonia says it will pay bail for employees arrested in abortion rights protests
A powerful statement from one of our nation's most trusted brands.
06.25.22
Everyone loves someone who had an abortion and other prote… | Flickr
In today's economy, people who work are demanding more accountability from their employers: better wages, benefits, transparency and alignment on values. The emphasis on shared values is coming to the forefront in the wake of the Supreme Court's decision to overturn Roe v. Wade, which removes federal protections for abortion. States, local governments and individuals are scrambling to react to the decision, which tosses out 50 years of legal precedence.
While the nation sorts out the politics and future legal decisions surrounding reproductive health, some companies are getting ahead of the issue by coming out publicly to support abortion rights, commonly referred to as "reproductive justice" by activists and advocates of a woman's right to choose. One of the most outspoken companies is Patagonia, who announced in the wake of the Supreme Court decision that they will not only financially support individuals who choose to have an abortion but they will provide funds to pay the bail for individuals who face legal expenses while protesting for reproductive justice.
In a statement on Patagonia's LinkedIn page, the company writes:
"Caring for employees extends beyond basic health insurance, so we take a more holistic approach to coverage and support overall wellness to which every human has a right. That means offering employees the dignity of access to reproductive health care. It means supporting employees’ choices around if or when they have a child. It means giving parents the resources they need to work and raise children."
As part of that commitment, Patagonia announced that all U.S. employees are covered for abortion care as part of their health care coverage. "Where restrictions exist, travel, lodging and food are covered." This includes 100 percent of co-pay costs for mental health visits.
Importantly, Patagonia showed why reproductive rights and healthcare are truly a holistic matter. In the same statement, Patagonia listed how they also support those individuals and families who choose to have children, including, writing:
We support new parents with:
- Two types of paid leave: 4 weeks of paid pregnancy disability leave and/or 12 weeks of paid parental bonding leave.
- Private spaces to feed infants.
- Child-care support for parents on work trips.
- Subsidized, on-site high-quality child care.
- Child-care stipends for parents who do not live near one of our child-care centers.
But it was a political component of Patagonia's message that went viral, with the company stating that all part-time and full-time employees will receive:
- Training and bail for those who peacefully protest for reproductive justice.
- Resources to make informed decisions at the ballot box.
- Time off to vote.
Educational voting resources and time off to vote simply should not be a political issue. Our democracy and our politics would be stronger with greater participation and understanding of how our government works. It's a principle that proves values regardless of where one falls on the political spectrum. If you want to advocate and vote for greater public financial assistance, it's obviously helpful to know which programs need more help and how to speak to that. Likewise, if you are a critic of government waste and believe certain issues are better handled in the private sector, participating as an informed voter helps your cause.
But it's the willingness of Patagonia to provide financial cover for its employees who peacefully protest in favor of reproductive justice that truly makes the company stand out. How many companies are willing to go that extra mile to empower their companies to be good citizens, not just good employees?
As a company here at Upworthy, we've always been proud of the work Patagonia does to protect our planet from the thread of climate change. Putting principles first is a great way for a company like Patagonia to show that they not only make a great product but that they use the goodwill and trust their brand has created to help make the world a better place for everyone. We'd all like to see a world where those principles are restored to the highest order within the halls of our government, where elected officials do the work of the people for the people. But until we achieve that more perfect union, it's important to know that where we spent our money outside of politics can go a long way toward protecting the values we cherish.
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Science
Incredible video shows a baby hawk nearly becoming eagle food. It becomes family instead.
Being adorable is a fantastic defense mechanism.
06.23.22
One of these things is not like the other.
Sometimes, life can unexpectedly snatch you away from safety and thrust you into imminent danger. Other times, life can just as quickly turn a dire circumstance into a heartwarming miracle.
Such was the case for a baby hawk who went from being dinner to being adopted by a family of bald eagles near the city of Nanaimo in British Columbia, Canada. The amazing moment was captured by a 24-hour livestream webcam run by GROWLS, a nonprofit organization that helps rescue and rehabilitate injured wildlife.
The video shows the seemingly doomed baby hawk being tossed into an eaglet’s nest. Pam McCartney, a GROWLS volunteer who had been watching the livestream at the time, braced herself.
"Usually when I watch, like, David Attenborough and his shows, I can close my eyes or fast forward or whatever, but this was live at the time, and I was just like, oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh," she told CBC.
Much to her surprise, nature seemed to have something else in mind.
The baby hawk had inexplicably survived the eagle’s talons, which in itself was an extraordinary feat according to ornithologist and Professor Emeritus of Wildlife Biology at Montreal's McGill University, David Bird, who shared the story on a segment of the radio show “As It Happens.” Yes, a guy who studies birds has the last name Bird. It’s too perfect.
In an even rarer phenomenon, the hawkling was spared by both the mother and baby eagle once they realized it was alive and moving around. McCartney shared that by that evening both chicks were being cared for. Her guess is that it might have something to do with the eagle family having recently lost one of the two eaglets.
"In my mind of growing up on Disney, I'm seeing this eaglet think like, ‘was this another little sibling?'" she told CBC.As mind boggling as it is, this is not the first hawk adoption story to hit the area. In 2017, a young red-tailed hawk, nicknamed Spunky, made headlines after being raised by a pair of bald eagles.
Bird told CBC that, while Spunky did require support from an extended family of scientists (primarily because hawks and eagles feed on different prey), it was still ultimately a success. Spunky is “alive and well,' which is a good omen for this new baby hawk.
So far, the birds are one big, happy family, McCartney reports, with plenty of “raptor kisses” for everyone.
Behold! A hawk-eagle!
Families really do come in many different shapes and sizes, all across the food chain.
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