Family
'It's not a woman's duty to smile for you' and 11 more strong, feminist facts.
On Tuesday, the hashtag #ItsNotAWomansDutyTo took off on Twitter.
05.11.16
True
Been stressed this week? Who hasn’t. That’s why we’re bringing you the latest in good news—five animal-themed stories we guarantee will put a smile on your face.
This week, we’re celebrating:
The most entertaining animal photos you've ever seen
Jason Moore/Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards 2023 and © Tzahi Finkelstein /Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards 2023
Need a laugh? How about a dozen laughs? Look no further than the 2023 Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards, a competition started in 2015 that focuses on the lighter side of wildlife photography. More than 1,800 photographers from around the world submitted photos, and the finalists—from a kangaroo playing air guitar to an arguing set of greenfinches—will absolutely make your day.
Healthier, happier, rescued pets
Hundreds of thousands of pets are relinquished to shelters each year, and many vulnerable pet populations—such as disabled and elderly dogs—can be hard to place in loving homes. Fortunately, Subaru has sponsored the rescue, rehabilitation, and adoption of more than 134,000 of these pets through the Subaru Share the Love® Event. As the largest corporate donor to the ASPCA® (The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals®), Subaru and its retailers are donating a minimum of $300 to charities like the ASPCA for every new Subaru purchase or lease during the 2024 Subaru Share the Love Event, happening now through January 2, 2025.
This animal-centric (and adorable) creative writing assignment
Amy McKinney, a third-grade teacher in Pennsylvania, recently had a genius idea for teaching her class persuasive writing: Rather than have them formulate an argument for an imagined audience (boring!), McKinney partnered with a local animal shelter and had her class write persuasive descriptions of each animal to help them get adopted. Each student chose a pet to write about and sent their essays to the shelter to display and post to the shelter’s social media channels. Student engagement was “tremendous,” said McKinney, and there’s no doubt these persuasive paragraphs made a huge difference in these shelter pet’s lives. Adorable.
The dog who saved his owner with CPR (yes, really)
Dogs have made the news for saving humans before, but have you ever heard of a dog performing CPR? That’s exactly what Bear, a Siberian Husky-Golden Retriever mix, did in 2022 when he found his owner unconscious on the floor after suffering a major heart attack. Not only was Bear able to quickly call for help, he even jumped on his owner’s chest repeatedly while someone else called the paramedics. Thanks to Bear, the owner survived what should have been a fatal heart attack. Now that deserves some head scritches.
Bee populations have reached a record high
macro shot photography of beePhoto by Jenna Lee on UnsplashHoneybees are essential to the planet, as they pollinate over 130 types of fruits, vegetables, and nuts. For years, honeybee numbers have been in decline—but happily, that’s starting to change. The US has added almost a million bee colonies in the past five years, with more than 3.8 million honeybees in total.
For more ways to smile, check out how Subaru is sharing the love this holiday season.
via Pixabay
When parents can't step up, should grandparents step in?
A story that recently went viral on Reddit’s AITA forum asks an important question: What is a parent’s role in taking care of their grandchildren? The story is even further complicated because the woman at the center of the controversy is a stepparent.
At the time of writing her post, the woman, 38, met her husband Sam, 47, ten years ago, when his daughter, Leah, 25, was 15. The couple married five years ago after Leah had moved out to go to college.
Leah’s mom passed away when she was 10.
When Leah became pregnant she wanted to keep the baby, but her boyfriend didn’t. After the disagreement, the boyfriend broke up with her. This forced Leah to move back home because she couldn’t afford to be a single parent and live alone on a teacher’s salary.
Leah’s story is familiar to many young mothers facing similar difficulties.
The father isn’t involved in the baby’s life as a caretaker or financially. Sadly, research shows that 33% of all children in the U.S. are born without their biological fathers living in the home.
Single motherhood comes with unique hardships.
The new mother is a teacher and can’t afford to live on her own with a child. In 2019, a study found that out the top 50 U.S. cities, Pittsburgh is the only one where a new teacher could afford rent.
Today, Portland, OR has joined the very short list of cities where an "average teacher can afford 91.3% of apartments within community distance of their school" according to a recent study.
The stressors of taking care of the baby made Leah realize she needed help.
“But once she had the baby around 4 months back, Leah seemed to realize having a baby is not the sunshine and rainbows she thought it was,” the woman wrote on Reddit. “She barely got any sleep during the last four months. All the while Sam was helping her with the baby while I did almost all chores myself.”
“Now her leave is ending. She did not want to leave the baby at daycare or with a nanny,” the woman continued. “Sam and I both work as well.”
Leah asked her stepmother if she would stay home with the baby. The stepmother said no because she never wanted to have a baby and she has a job. “I asked why Leah can't stay home with the baby herself,” the woman wrote. “She said how she was young and had to build a career. I said many people take breaks to raise kids, and she broke down crying about how she was so tired all the time being a mom and needed something else in her life too.”
The demands of new motherhood are usually all-encompassing.
via Pixabay
After the woman told her stepdaughter no, her husband pressured her to stay home with the baby. But she refused to give up her job to raise her stepdaughter’s child. “Leah said yesterday how she wished her mom was alive since she would have had her back. She said I didn't love her, and my husband is also mad at me,” the woman wrote. The woman asked the Reddit community if she was in the wrong for “refusing to help my stepdaughter with the baby,” and the community responded with rapturous support.
"[The woman] should tell her husband to knock it off and stop trying to pressure her into raising his daughter’s baby. If he wants a family member to look after her baby while she works, then he can do it," user Heavy_Sand5228 wrote.
"This is Leah's baby that she alone chose to have. That doesn't obligate you to change YOUR life to suit her desires. The whole business of saying you don't love her because you won't quit your job to watch her baby is manipulative and messed up, and I'm shocked your husband is siding with her," user SupremeCourtJust-a** added.
Leah and many women like her are in this situation because, in many places, teachers are underpaid, rent is high, and not all dads pay child support, even those required by law.
Another commenter noted that the baby is much more the father’s responsibility than the stepmother's. "To add, Leah should consider seeking child support from her ex. Her kid should be getting that money," Obiterdicta wrote.
While there are resources to help stepparents connect with their stepchildren and step-grandchildren, it's important to remember that the responsibility to raise a child ultimately rests with the parent(s).
This article originally appeared last year.
via Fowl Language
Fowl Language by Brian Gordon
Brian Gordon is a cartoonist. He's also a dad, which means he's got plenty of inspiration for the parenting comics he creates for his website, Fowl Language (not all of which actually feature profanity). He covers many topics, but it's his hilarious parenting comics that are resonating with parents everywhere.
"My comics are largely autobiographical," Gordon tells me. "I've got two kids who are 4 and 7, and often, what I'm writing happened as recently as that very same day."
Gordon shared 15 of his oh-so-real comics with us. They're all funny 'cause they're true.
Let's get started with his favorite, "Welcome to Parenting," which Gordon says sums up his comics pretty well. "Parenting can be such tedious drudgery," he says, "but if it wasn't also so incredibly rewarding there wouldn't be nearly so many people on the planet."
Truth.
I hope you enjoy these as much as I did.
1.
“Welcome to parenting."
via Fowl Language
All comics are shared here with Gordon's express permission. These comics are all posted on his website, in addition to his Facebook page. You can also find a "bonus" comic that goes with each one by clicking the "bonus" link. Original. Bonus.
2.
Perception shifts.
via Fowl Language
I love Gordon's comics so much because they're just about the reality of parenting — and they capture it perfectly.
There's no parenting advice, no judgment, just some humor about the common day-to-day realities that we all share.
When I ask him about the worst parenting advice he's ever received, Gordon relays this anecdote:
"I remember being an absolute sleep-deprived wreck, sitting outside a sandwich shop, wolfing down my lunch quickly beside my 1-month-old son, who was briefly resting his lungs between screaming fits.
A rather nosy woman walked up to me and said, all smugly, 'You should enjoy this time while they're easy.' It was the exact worst thing anyone could have said to me in that moment and I just wanted to curl up on the sidewalk and cry."
Who hasn't been on the receiving end of totally unneeded and unwanted advice? That's why Gordon's comics are so welcome: They offer up a space for us to all laugh about the common experiences we parents share.
Here's to Gordon for helping us chuckle (through the tears).
This article originally appeared eight years ago.
From Your Site Articles
- Mom's comics illustrate the parenting double standard - Upworthy ›
- Nine things new parents think they need and practical alternatives - Upworthy ›
- Child development Phd shares parenting advice - Upworthy ›
- 10 things that made us smile this week - Upworthy ›
- Woman finds out daughter is labeled a 'flight risk' at school - Upworthy ›
- Little girl shocks her mom by pulling out a pocket full of worms - Upworthy ›
- Dad tells child their mom has rabies in funny misunderstanding - Upworthy ›
- Mom shares wild story of how her daughter kidnapped a baby - Upworthy ›
- Mom shares PSA on about being a sports mom while also working - Upworthy ›
- Woman calls cops on another parent and regrets it - Upworthy ›
- Her boyfriend asked her to draw a comic about their relationship. Hilarity ensued. - Upworthy ›
- Mom teaches daughter a perfect lesson after she threw her new pencil case in the trash. - Upworthy ›
Family finds surprise gift on mom's grave after leaving yarn tribute
Losing a loved one is difficult. It feels exceptionally more difficult when the person you've lost is your parent but you do what you can to keep their memory alive. Everyone has their own way of doing this. It could be that they've planted a tree to put their ashes around or they wear their loved one's favorite sweater on rough days.
There's no right or wrong way of paying tribute to someone that has passed as it's usually a personal decision. When Robin Epley, a writer for the Sacramento Bee lost her mother Cynthia in 2019, she and her father went with a bench design for her grave marker so they could sit with her. The bench is made of stone with her mother's picture emblazoned on the front.
On a more recent visit to the memorial bench, the pair decided to leave balls of yarn as a tribute since the mom was an avid crocheter, teaching Robin the craft at just six years old. The small act of remembrance was just that, a tiny gesture that meant something that a passerby may not understand. After leaving, the pair didn't think much of it until they returned for another visit only to find a surprise waiting for them on that very bench.
pink and green flower bouquet on brown concrete wall
Photo by Caroline Attwood on Unsplash
Someone had taken the yarn and knitted a scarf out of it, draping it over the area of the bench that displayed Cynthia's name. There was no note left with the handmade gift. Just a scarf created by someone that decided to turn a family's tribute into a piece of wearable love and a couple of bouquets of flowers.
Robin shared a photo of the bench with the knitted scarf visible on X, explaining how the scarf got there, writing, "im sobbing: My mom was a big crocheter, so on her bench at East Lawn, my dad and I left one of her balls of yarn as a tribute. He just went back today after a few weeks to tend to the site, and someone had used the yarn to knit mom a scarf."
People were moved by the act of kindness by a stranger with some even suggesting possible culprits to the artistic endeavor, one of which caught Robin's attention. In a follow up comment, the grieving daughter writes, "I don’t know who did it, though someone has suggested it was the wonderful staff or volunteers at @EastLawnSac, a group which my mom was a part of. I just hope this is a reminder to everyone that the simplest act of kindness from you can completely brighten a stranger’s day."
Others chimed in to share their own stories of loss and ways of coping, while also admiring what this anonymous knitter did for the family of Cynthia.
One person writes, "Oh that is so special. I wear the joggers my mom wore the last time I saw her. I remember she had them on backwards because I could see the pockets. She laughed her familiar laugh for me one last time. That was two years ago. It's getting easier. Thanks for sharing."
Someone else gives their guess on who might have done such a kind gesture, "This is so sweet. I know there are a lot of regular visitors and volunteers who like to care for the memorials, but my money is on a staff member having done this. The staff and leadership at East Lawn are very special people."
Cry Hug GIF by HollyoaksGiphy
Robin and her dad may never find out who made the scarf using the yarn they left behind, but that act of kindness will stay with them both for years to come, and Cynthia would approve.
"Knowing someone out there who didn’t even know my mom cared enough to do this has me in total shambles. honestly, it’s totally something my mom would have done for someone else, karma is real," Robin says in response to another commenter.
It doesn't always take a lot to be kind to others but it can turn someone's day around. Sometimes people just need a reminder that someone out there cares, even if it doesn't always feel that way. Acts of kindness can go a long way.
From Your Site Articles
envisionaries/TikTok & Leo McLaren/Unsplash
People just can't stop finding new ways to drive each other crazy on airplanes. Whether it's using kids as an excuse to try to switch seats, eating smelly food, standing and block the aisles immediately after landing, or having phone calls on speakerphone, airplanes have become hotbeds of bad behavior. The unique cocktail of travel stress, cramped spaces, alcohol, and altitude seems to have a big effect on our judgment for some reason.
One passenger recently went viral for some interesting behavior during a long flight. And let's just say, her fellow passengers couldn't stand it.
Richard Duong posted a video on TikTok of a passenger several rows ahead of him on a flight. The caption: "Lady stood on my flight the ENTIRE 7 hour duration watching her movie."
Although the video is short, it definitely backs up his claim. Through several clips stitched together, we see a blonde woman standing in the aisle staring at her back-of-seat screen. Lights on? She's standing there. Lights go off? Still standing there.
Duong mentioned in a comment that she did return to her seat when the pilot turned on the seatbelt light, but otherwise, she was standing the entire time.
He also mentioned that passengers on the flight were definitely annoyed. People asking to squeeze by to get to the bathroom, and even the flight attendants trying to serve drinks, were less than thrilled that she was blocking the aisle for so long.
I can imagine it made the passengers around her uneasy, too. Have you ever sensed someone standing over you and felt a sort of unexplainable anxiety? It must have driven the people seated near this woman absolutely bonkers!
We've heard of people having too much to drink or taking their socks off during a flight, but standing the entire time has to be a new one.
@envisionaries #onthisday
Commenters on the video — unlike some passengers on the flight — had a lot of empathy for the mysterious standing woman.
Apparently, there are a lot of reasons someone might want to stand for *checks notes* seven hours straight.
Some people suggested the woman had a clotting disorder and couldn't sit down for long.
Others speculated about back issues like sciatica, a broken tailbone, severe motion sickness, a herniated disc, or fibromyalgia. Someone said the woman probably had restless leg syndrome.
Alev Takil/Unsplash
The theories just kept coming — to date, the video has racked up nearly a million views and 800 comments.
Duong, who posted the video, probably had the most likely explanation: "I thought she was standing just to stand."
It's true — some people just like to stand! Maybe they read an article about the dangers of sitting and leading a sedentary lifestyle, or maybe it just feels good and relaxes them. The mystery woman could very well have restless legs or a back injury, but maybe she just felt like standing except when she was specifically told not to.
What I loved about the response to Duong's video was the outpouring of empathy. People were really willing, and even eager, to excuse the woman's admittedly pretty obnoxious behavior by justifying it with a medical reason.
It was honestly really refreshing to read the incredibly laundry list of possible medical conditions that could make someone want to stand for an entire flight. We're often so quick to assume the worst in people — that mom trying to switch seats with her kid is just trying to take advantage, people who stand up right away after landing are just being jerks, etc. It's rare that we stop to think and realize that we don't know their story, their medical history, what happened to them earlier that day, what they're really like as a person.
In a follow up video, Duong clarified: "Yes she would get out of the way (for passengers and crew), she was very polite, no fuss or anything, but it did impact the flight."
"The video was not meant to be mean or judgmental. The video was never about her as a person. It was a funny, unexpected event. A woman standing on a flight for seven hours, you don't see that every day."