+

Toddlers, am I right?

Photo by George Marks/Retrofile/Getty Images.

We love them, and they're adorable, but oh boy are they a handful.


Supposedly, kids start to rapidly develop empathy somewhere around their second birthday. But let's be real: They're still learning. Most of the time, they're self-centered, extremely emotional, and prone to outbursts.

Any parent who claims they've never lost their cool around a screaming child isn't being totally honest.

But there's a clever "parenting hack" making its way around the internet that's supposed to help stressed-out parents stay calm under pressure.

Or, at least, help them cool down following a major temper tantrum from their darling angel.

It's called the "hair tie trick," or "rubber band trick," pioneered by parenting blogger Kelly at The (Reformed) Idealist Mom.

Sick and tired of constantly being angry with her young daughter, she got the idea to keep track of every time she snapped, yelled, or lashed out with hair ties or rubber bands around her wrist.

Every time she felt like she lost her temper, she moved one hair band to the other arm.

In order to "earn it back," she had to sit down and create a few positive moments with her daughter: reading a book together, dancing, singing a song.

The goal is to keep as many bands as possible on the original wrist.

If you're skeptical, you're not the only one. But moms and dads sharing this trick like crazy online say it works.

This post about the chill-out tactic from one mom, Shauna Harvey, recently went viral.

Today, I tried something new.Blogger here----> http://idealistmom.com/angry-mother/Something that required me to...

Posted by Shauna Harvey on Tuesday, May 16, 2017

The response has been huge, with thousands of parents sharing with other parents in need.

We all want to be the perfect mom or the perfect dad — the one who always has everything under control and can soothe a crying child while simultaneously whipping up an organic, Instagram-worthy dinner, all with a beaming smile.

But the truth is parenting is rarely that effortless. And worse, when the stress does get the better of us, it can be really harmful for both us and our relationship with our kids.

The hair tie trick may seem cheesy, but anything that reminds us to slow down, breathe, and at least try to enjoy quality time with our kids is certainly worth a shot.

Photo by Stormseeker on Unsplash

Some cries for help can be hard to discern.

“I’m fine.”

How easily these two words slip from our mouths, often when nothing could be further from the truth. Sometimes, it feels safer to hide our true feelings, lest someone make a judgment or have a negative reaction. Other times, it’s a social rule instilled in childhood, perhaps even through punishment. Or maybe denying is the only way to combat overwhelm—if we ignore it all long enough, things will eventually get better anyway.

At the end of the day … it’s all about avoiding further pain, isn’t it?

But this denial can lead to even more suffering—not only emotionally, but physically as well. Everything from stiff muscles, to migraines, to digestive issues can stem from suppressing emotions.

Keep ReadingShow less
Pop Culture

Little girl sings Selena's ‘Como La Flor’ and wows the late singer's widower

'It's good to see someone like her, who will be the next Selena in so many ways.'

Little girl sings Selena's "Como La Flor."

Selena Quintanilla Pérez is so well-known that she's best recognized simply as "Selena," the same way people refer to Madonna.

Nearly 30 years after her untimely death, parents are passing the music of Selena onto their children and creating a new generation of fans. And in the age of social media, that means the new waves of fans are creating videos singing the icon's hits. In a video clip uploaded to Instagram and TikTok, 10-year-old Mariapaula Mazon gets up on stage to belt out "Como La Flor."

Keep ReadingShow less

This dad exemplifies stellar parenting.

As a parent, it's not always easy to know how to help your kids learn from life experiences. Some lessons they learn naturally and others they learn through parental guidance, but discerning which is which and how those things overlap can be challenging.

Kids don't come with instruction manuals, of course, but sometimes we see examples of great parenting we can point to and say, "AHA! That's how it's done."

One such example comes from a dad named Robert. He's been teaching his 5-year-old daughter Aubrin to skateboard and set up a mini half pipe for her to learn on. In a video on Instagram, Robert shared his interchanges with Aubrin after she crashed hard on the ramp during a lesson.

Keep ReadingShow less