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Family

10 things kids get in trouble for that adults get away with all the time

Why do we expect children to have more self-control than grown-ups?

three kids at a table, one with hands over eyes, one with hands over ears, one with hands over mouth

Photo by Keren Fedida on Unsplash

Kids know when we're being hypocritical.

Raising kids is tough and no parent does it perfectly. Each child is different, each has their own personalities, strengths and challenges, and each of them requires something different from their parents in order to flourish.

But there's one thing that parents have long said, with their actions if not with their words, that justifiably drives kids bonkers: "Do as I say, not as I do."

To be fair, both moral and actual law dictate that there are things that adults can do that kids can't. Children can't drive or consume alcohol, for example, so it's not hypocritical for adults to do those things while telling kids they cannot. There are other things—movies, TV shows, books, etc.—that parents have to decide whether their kids are ready for or not based on their age and developmental stage, and that's also to be expected.

But there are some gaps between what adults do and what they expect kids to do that aren't so easy to reconcile.

In fact, there's a lot of hypocrisy when it comes to the way adults behave and the way they think kids should behave that warrants some examination. Here are 10 things some people punish kids for that adults do with total impunity:

1. Being hangry

Grown-ups are so familiar with being cranky when they need food that they coined the term "hangry." And yet, if a child melts down because they're hungry, they are expected to pull themselves together and "stop that fussing."

Sure, kids have to learn to regulate their emotional expression, but being punished for needing food and not being able to control their reactions to hunger yet isn't going to teach them that regulation. They have a hard enough time learning that skill when they aren't hungry, so give kids a little grace when the hanger hits. (And always carry snacks.)

2. Not wanting to share something special

The concept of sharing is something most parents try to instill into their kids in order to move them away from self-centeredness. That's not a bad thing, for sure.

But it's worth noting that most adults have certain special belongings that they don't want other people to use, which is totally fine, so expecting kids to always share everything doesn't really make sense. Instead, teach kids that if they have something special that they don't want to share, to keep that item put away when other kids are around. They can also learn to kindly say, "Actually, that toy is extra special to me, but I'm happy to let you play with this one" while offering something else.

3. Breaking dishes, dropping drinks, or other oopsies

How many of us don't break a dish on occasion, simply due to fumbling fingers?

Accidents happen, and it's not always because we're being careless. If a kid is tossing a dish up in the air and trying to catch it behind their back or some other foolish game, that's worth a talking to about carelessness. But if a child breaks something or drops something, our first reaction shouldn't be to get angry and blame or shame them.

Grown-ups don't get in trouble when they drop something. Kids, who have a lot less experience with their hands, definitely shouldn't. Model forgiveness and compassion by helping them clean up the mess, and move on.

4. Not responding immediately

"Did you hear what I said? Are you listening?" we ask our children mere minutes after they had to repeat "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy," to us before we were able to respond to them.

We can't expect our kids to immediately pull their attention away from what they are doing every time we want to say something to them, just as we can't always immediately shift our focus to them if we're putting together a recipe or typing out a thought or in the middle of a calculation.

It's reasonable to teach kids to respectfully say, "One second, please," if we want their attention when they're in the middle of something. That teaches them that their learning/play is worth concentrating on, but also that responding to their parents is important. Give them a little time to disengage, just as adults grant one another all the time if we need to talk.

5. Forgetting things

Adults sometimes forget their lunchbox at home. Adults sometimes leave their jacket someplace by accident. Forgetting things is a normal human phenomenon, not limited to children, and we all give one another grace when we forget something.

With kids, we tend to be less forbearing. If forgetting is a daily occurrence, then sure, it might need to be addressed. But making a kid go hungry because they forgot their lunch even though we could easily bring it to them because "this will teach them to remember it" is kind of silly. Would we do that to our spouse if they forgot their lunch? No. Why do it with a kid (again, unless it's a recurring habit)?

6. Refusing to eat something

We all have likes and dislikes, and one man's feast is another man's napkin food. We would never force an adult who doesn't like sweet potatoes to stay at the table until they finish their sweet potatoes. Why do that to kids?

Encouraging kids to try something they've never tasted is one thing, but making them eat something they've tried and didn't like is just ick. Kids can learn to be grateful for the food they have without being made to eat everything on their plate. Provide lots of options, encourage tasting, but don't force kids to eat anything. That's a quick way to take the enjoyment out of trying new foods and create a negative association with eating certain foods—the exact opposite of what you're wanting.

Most kids will grow out of picky eating, but there will always be certain things people don't care for. It's okay to let that be.

7. Fidgeting

Some people have a really hard time sitting still for long periods of time, adults and children alike. But kids are the ones who get in trouble for not sitting still. Look at how popular standing desks, under-the-desk treadmills and walking meetings have become for working adults—and that's even when they have comfortable, ergonomic office chairs to sit in.

Yet kids are expected to sit in uncomfortable desks most of the day without being able to get up and move around as they need to? No wonder some kids get fidgety.

8. Being in a bad mood

We all have our moments, don't we? Times when we're just feeling salty or irritable and we don't even know why? Maybe it's hormones, maybe it's hanger, maybe it's a full moon—whatever it is, we let people know we're feeling prickly and do what we need to do to either stay away from people or put ourselves right.

What certainly wouldn't help is having someone chide us for having a "bad attitude" and insist that we "shape up." Helping kids manage their mood or alter their environment when they're struggling to manage it is a much more effective life skill than punishing them for being in a bad mood.

9. Complaining

Ever seen a grown-up sit down to do their taxes without a single complaint? No, you haven't, because even if we're getting a refund the process of figuring it out is painful.

Plenty of adults complain when we have to do something we don't want to do, and it's not because we were raised that way, most of the time. It's because some things just suck and it makes us feel better in the moment to express how much they suck.

What kids complain about may seem trivial or silly to us, but it's not to them. Totally find to teach kids that complaining doesn't do any good, but not worth punishing them for it.

10. Sneaking sweets

Umm, hi. Guilty, pretty much daily.

It's technically not sneaking when you own the sweets and you're a grown-up, but it feels like it. And who can blame kids for wanting to raid the cookie jar or the chocolate chip stash? Not saying they should. Just saying I get it, kid.

What else belongs on this list?

This article originally appeared on 3.1.24

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parenting

Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption

Family

Joe grew up without stability. Now, he’s giving 10 adopted sons the home he never had.

“I want my boys to know that no matter what, they have a place to belong.”

True

Like many children who are placed in foster care across the United States, Joe’s childhood was marked by chaos and a struggle to survive.

Joe still remembers neglect and abuse being part of his daily reality. Often left to care for his younger siblings alone, Joe grew up far too quickly.

He and his brothers were placed in the New York foster care system at an early age. And when he aged out of foster care at 21, he had no family to turn to for support.

“Statistically, I should be in jail, or I could be dead,” Joe said. “But that’s not my destiny.”

Today, Joe is determined to change the trajectory for young people lingering in foster care … as an adoptive parent and as an advocate, raising awareness along with organizations like the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption.

A complex problem with an evidence-based solution

More than 100,000 children in the U.S. foster care system are waiting for a safe, permanent home. But the sad reality is that thousands will “age out” of the system between 18 and 21, stepping into adulthood without support, guidance or a safety net.

The consequences of this can be devastating. Youth who leave foster care without the support of a forever family are much more likely to experience negative outcomes, including homelessness, unemployment, substance abuse and early, unplanned parenthood.

Through its signature program, Wendy’s Wonderful Kids®, the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption is working to be a part of the solution across the U.S. and Canada. Through this program, the Foundation supports the hiring of adoption professionals — known as recruiters — who serve children most at risk of aging out of foster care, including older children, children with special needs and siblings.

Wendy’s Wonderful Kids recruiters use an evidence-based, child-focused model, identifying trusted adults in the child’s network who may be open to adoption — and research shows that it works. A five-year, national evaluation showed that children referred to the program are up to three times more likely to be adopted.

Changing the journey for a new generation

Xavier was 18 and at risk of aging out of foster care without family support when he met Joe.

“My biggest fear was that I was going to age out and not know how to be sufficient on my own,” Xavier said. But Joe adopted Xavier just weeks before he was set to age out of the system. In the years that followed, Joe adopted from foster care again. And again.

Today, Joe is a father to 10 sons, seven of whom were adopted with help from the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption.

“Meeting my boys has put them on a different path,” Joe said. “Wendy’s Wonderful Kids was a real support and guide to being able to do what I try to do: making sure they have the tools to survive.”

“For me, it’s been beautiful to see that [my brothers are] spreading out to go live their own lives,” Xavier said. “It’s something [Joe] has prepared us for. He gave us the mentality that we could do whatever we want.”

Writing a new ending

After aging out of foster care, Joe managed to defy the odds, graduating from college and becoming a school counselor. Still, despite his own success story, he knows that many children who spend time in foster care aren’t as fortunate.

Joe hopes providing a “home base” for his sons means a brighter future for them.

“Here, we have people you can call your family — your brothers, your father,” Joe said. “Everybody, no matter where they are, knows that they can come home.”

Learn more about the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption and how you can help find forever families for more children lingering in foster care right now.

Modern Families

51-year-old empty nester who struggled to declutter her house shares 8 tips that finally worked

"Shoes are put away immediately upon walking in the house."

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Photo credit: Canva

Mom and empty nester shares her tips for decluttering her home.

Deep cleaning and decluttering a home is a daunting task—especially for empty nesters. After spending a lifetime creating memories and living together under one roof, doing a big declutter can take an emotional toll.

It's a milestone that many empty nesters know the sting of. And in an cleaning community on Reddit, a 51-year-old mom and recent empty nester shared her experience cleaning and decluttering her home after entering this new phase of life.

"In my entire life, my house has always been messy. I mean, I didn’t have a disaster-level situation going on, but if someone dropped by unannounced, it would’ve been super embarrassing," she shared. "When my kids were younger, we had a housekeeper because I just couldn’t keep up. Now that we’re empty nesters, I realized I never really learned how to keep house."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

She explained that the book Unf*ck Your Habitat: You're Better Than Your Mess played an integral part in helping her declutter—and offered eight helpful tips to fellow empty nesters looking to organize their new lives.

1. Put stuff away, not down.

Her first tip is the key to decluttering.

"Whatever you have goes right back where it’s supposed to go when I’m done with it," she notes.

2. Do laundry every day.

And she doesn't just wash and dry her laundry when doing it.

"Just one load, start to finish. Wash, dry, fold, and put away," she shares. "Also, no chair or floor laundry. It gets put in the hamper or hung back up. No clothes are ever out."

3. I make the bed every day.

The benefits keep on giving by doing this, she notes.

"It just makes my bedroom look cleaner and I smile every time I come in my room," she writes. "Plus we aren’t fighting over the covers when we get in because the bed is straightened out."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

4. Do a quick daily clean-up of commonly used spaces.

She cleans the places that her and her husband use frequently.

"I keep a stack of cleaning rags in my master bath because it’s the only bathroom that’s used every single day. Every night, I spray the counter, wipe everything down, put everything back (that my husband leaves out), and wipe the mirror," she explains. "I also wipe down the toilet. I find that I don’t need a huge, big cleaning of this space because I’m keeping it up daily. Same goes for the kitchen."

5. Dishes are always put away, cabinet or dishwasher.

No dishes in the sink or stuck in the dishwasher.

"Dishes are finished in the dishwasher? It’s emptied and dirty ones are placed inside while waiting for the dishwasher to get full," she notes.

@brunchwithbabs
Life Changing Dishwasher Hack #tutorials #kitchenhacks #parentsoftiktok #dishwasherhack

6. Don't neglect your shoes.

When she takes them off, they get put away.

"Shoes are put away immediately upon walking in the house," she shares.

7. Knock out small tasks.

There is no time to waste.

"If it takes less than 5 minutes clean it while you’re waiting for something else to get done," she writes.

8. Take no days off.

Rather than assign certain days for cleaning, she is constantly doing it throughout the week.

"Lastly, I do not have scheduled cleaning days. I just do something all the time," she explains. "My life is kind of unpredictable, we love traveling or going out for the day so my so called cleaning schedule would be shot to hell every time. It’s better this way, because now I never feel behind."

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Joy

10 conversation starters that will instantly draw people to you

Avoid awkward small talk.

how to start a conversation, conversation starter, conversation starters, conversation questions, small talk

Photo credit: Canva

The best conversation starters to ask during small talk.

Knowing how to start a conversation in a new social or professional setting can be difficult. Small talk can quickly become dull and uncomfortable.

Whether you're returning to work in the office or trying to make new friends in a new city, it can help to have a few conversation starters prepared. The key to engaging people is to start with open-ended questions.

"The best format for conversation starters is to use an open-ended question that allows the other person to speak openly and freely in a casual and comfortable way," Amy Arias, M.A., senior lecturer of communications studies at the University of Nevada, Reno, tells Upworthy.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Looking for unique conversation starters that will draw people in? Here are 10 questions to get the conversation going:

"What’s giving you energy right now?"

"This question prompts people to move from surface-level small talk to a genuine connection," leadership strategist and executive coach Stacy McCracken, founder & CEO of Impact and Lead, tells Upworthy. "It invites the other person to share. It’s present, personal, and lets you see what’s fueling them—whether that’s a project, a person, or a long-overdue break. It works because it’s about emotion, not status."

"What's the story behind your name?"

"This one usually gets people immediately to connect and share," public speaking expert LaQuita Cleare, founder & CEO at Clear Communication Academy, tells Upworthy. "It allows you to learn a little bit more about the person, the family, and the culture. It's a quick and meaningful way for people to let their guards down and simply tell you a story."

"What’s something your younger self would be proud you’re doing now?"

"I personally love this question, and even ask it to my clients all the time," Cheryl Groskopf, LMFT, LPCC, an anxiety, trauma, and attachment therapist in Los Angeles, tells Upworthy. "This kind of question lights up the inner child and the present-day self, which makes it emotionally rich. It also tends to lead into the stuff people don’t usually talk about first: healing, change, confidence, effort."

"What’s something fun (show, hobby, or place you discovered) that you’ve been enjoying lately?"

"This open-ended question gives people multiple ways to connect (entertainment, activities, experiences), making it easy and low-pressure to engage," Arias notes. "It also naturally leads to follow-up questions and shared stories."

"If you could plan your perfect weekend, what would it look like?"

"It invites the person to share personal preferences and values (adventure vs. relaxation, social vs. solo time) while keeping the tone warm and imaginative," Arias explains. "It encourages playful conversation and creates space for finding compatibility and shared interests. It's worth noting that an effective conversation starter in a romantic context is often not, in nature, romantic."

@kiersay
Replying to @Jordan Di487 QUESTIONS FOR BETTER CONVERSATION (part 4) #conversationstarters #questionoftheday #questionsforcouples #ditchthesmalltalk

"What's your favorite place to spend your downtime?"

"This tells you a lot about a person and is a nice intro question that does not pry too much," Cleare shares. "This is also a great one to find common ground, which is what you want to keep the conversation going."

"What’s something that’s caught your curiosity lately?"

"I love this one because curiosity is the spark of every great conversation," adds McCracken. "It opens space for people to share what’s lighting them up—a topic, a hobby, or even a random fact. Curiosity connects people faster than credentials ever will."

"What’s something you wish more people asked you about?"

"Everyone has a part of their life they love but no one ever brings up, like a weird skill, a quiet win, a topic they never get to share," Groskopf shares. "This question lets people steer the conversation toward something that ACTUALLY excites them. It’s casual, but opens a door you normally wouldn’t walk through."

See on Instagram

"What do you love about your job?"

"This one is always fun because if they love their job, their eyes light up and they start telling your stories and if they hate their job, that also brings a fun moment and an eye roll," says Cleare.

"What’s surprised you lately?"

"This one always brings out thoughtful, funny, or even vulnerable stories," McCracken says. "It nudges people to reflect—and reflection is where real connection happens. It’s the perfect balance of light and meaningful."

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Popular

15 old-school casserole recipes that feel like home for boomers and Gen Xers

Tried-and-true one-pan dinners from back in the day.

casserole, casseroles, casserole recipe, casserole recipes, gen x, boomers

Image via Reddit/MyDogGoldi

Vintage casserole recipes from Gen X and boomer childhoods.

Childhood dishes can take you straight back to your seat at the family dinner table. Comfort meals that were served there are uber nostalgic. And there is one dish represents the epitome of Gen X and baby boomer childhoods: casseroles.

These one-dish wonders were loaded with flavor and baked to perfection. Pulled straight from the oven to the dinner table, casseroles filled the house with the smell of unique home-cooked recipes.

And while most of us are eating casseroles today at Thanksgiving, Gen Xers and boomers grew up eating casseroles on the reg.

Here are 15 old-school casserole recipes that Redditors grew up eating, which are just as yummy today:

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Chicken casseroles

Fancy Fast Chicken casserole

"Fancy Fast Chicken is delicious and so simple. Line up chicken breasts in a casserole dish. Dump uncooked stuffing over top the chicken breasts. Pour Cream of Mushroom (Onion or chicken works too) and incorporate it into the stuffing. Top with cheese of your choice, and fried onions if you're inclined. Bake at 350 for 45min or until chicken is thoroughly cooked." - Applepoisoneer

Chicken Curry Divan casserole

"My favorite is Chicken Curry Divan. A friend made it for me in college 40 years ago and it is a favorite to this day. Never disappoints. Many people have asked me for the recipe over the years. My best friends kids now that they are grown have each approached me for it.

1 1/2 lbs chicken breast tenders cooked and cut into bite sized pieces
3 cups broccoli in bite sized pieces
2 cans Cream of Chicken soup
1 cup mayonnaise (must be Mayo)
2 tsp curry
Juice of 1 lemon
Shredded sharp cheddar (use the amount you like o like a nice even cover of the top)
3/4 cup crushed Ritz crackers
3 tbsp melted butter
In 9x13” baking pan layer chicken then broccoli.

Mix the soup, Mayo, lemon juice and curry together well, pour over chicken broccoli mixture evenly and smooth out. Sprinkle cheese over top evenly. Crush crackers fine, mix in melted butter well and sprinkle evenly over top. Cook at 375° for 25-30 minutes until bubbly and top brown. Serve with rice." - karinchup

Chicken and Rice casserole

"This baked rice & cheese casserole has become a staple in our house! It’s great as a side dish, or I’ll add rotisserie chicken and serve it as a main dish." - anchovypepperonitoni

Chicken & Dumplings casserole

"The secret of this is not to stir anything. That's what makes your dumplings. When you dish it out, you have your dumplings on top.
2 chicken breasts, cooked and shredded; 2 cups chicken broth; 1/2 stick of butter; 2 cups Bisquick mix; 2 cups whole milk; 1 can cream of chicken soup; 1/2 medium onion, minced; 1 cup frozen peas; 3 tsp chicken Better Than Bouillon; 1/2 tsp dried sage; 1 tsp black pepper; 1/2 tsp salt.

(1) Preheat oven to 350 degrees
(2) Layer 1 - In 9x13 casserole dish, melt 1/2 stick of butter. Spread shredded chicken over butter. Sprinkle black pepper and dried sage over this layer. Do not stir.
(3) Layer 2 - Sprinkle minced onions and peas over chicken
(4) Layer 3 - In small bowl, mix milk and Bisquick. Slowly pour all over chicken. Do not stir.
(5) Layer 4 - In medium bowl, whisk together 2 cups of chicken broth, chicken bouillon, and soup. Once blended, slowly pour over the Bisquick layer. Do not stir.
(6) Bake casserole for 30-40 minutes, or until the top is golden brown." - Superb_Yak7074

Chicken broccoli casserole

"I made chicken broccoli casserole last week and that's a favorite here. This is pretty close to how I do it." - gimmethelulz

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Potato casseroles

Funeral Potatoes

"The unfortunately named, funeral potatoes!" - IRLperson

Tater Tot casserole

"Tater tot casserole. My mom made this at least once a week when I was growing up, but she added a quart of green beans to make it a meal. If you brown your ground beef in a good size cast iron skillet, you only dirty up one pan to make it!" - hcynthia1234, upperwareParTAY

Breakfast casserole

"I’m making a breakfast casserole this morning for brunch later—a bag of frozen hash brown potatoes thawed, a pound of sausage sauteed with peppers and onions, a brick of cheese grated, eight eggs beaten with a bit of milk and cream and some salt and pepper. Layer in a casserole, ending with cheese. Bake around an hour at 375." - CWrend

Hamburger pie casserole

"One of my childhood favorites. Did not add vegetables or cheese though. This was an end of the month struggle meal that everyone loved." - DarnHeather

Shepherd's pie casserole

"Shepherd's pie : brown 1.5 lbs ground beef with half a chopped onion, salt and pepper, drain it and then spread into a 13x9 and stir a can of cream of mushroom soup into it. Spread a drained family size can of corn on top, use a container of prepared mashed potatoes for the top layer. Bake for a half hour at 350." - ExplanationLucky1143

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Noodle casseroles

Tuna casserole

"Love my mom's tuna noodle casserole: 1 bag broad egg noodles, 1 can cream of mushroom soup, 2 cans tuna, 1 cup frozen corn or 1 can kernel corn, 2 cups shredded sharp cheddar cheese, 1/2 cup seasoned bread crumbs, 1 tbsp celery salt
Cook noodles per package directions, drain, then place in a 13x9 casserole dish. Mix in cream of mushroom soup, tuna, corn, 1 cup of the cheddar cheese, and celery salt. Top the casserole with the remaining cheese and bread crumbs. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes or until done enough for you." - Pinkleton

Mock Stroganoff casserole

"Mock stroganoff - brown 1lb ground chuck. Mix in 8 oz sour cream and 1 can cream of mushroom. Add to 1 lb of cooked egg noodles. Season with black pepper. Extras - fresh mushrooms and/or onion cooked with the beef. Any precooked veggies of your choice, peas or broccoli work well. Splash of Worcestershire, soy sauce, or fish sauce. Garlic or onion powder. Parsley, thyme, or cilantro." - Nathan_Saul

Cabbage noodle casserole

"I have a quick cabbage and noodles that uses bagged cole slaw. Cook a bag of noodles. Put aside. Cut up a lb of bacon and a med onion. Cook in pan until bacon is slightly fried and onions are clear. Add cabbage(without carrots) let sit 10 min or so. Add to noodles. It's so easy." - conjas11

@allrecipes
Thanksgiving prep class is now in session! 🍂🧑‍🏫 If there's one thing you need to nail on the big day (other than the turkey, of course), it's Green Bean Casserole. This recipe tastes just like the one your grandmother used to make, if not even better! 😋 Continue reading or click the link in the @allrecipes bio to get the full recipe. Ingredients: 2 (15-ounce) cans cut green beans, drained 1 (10.5-ounce) can condensed cream of mushroom soup ¾ cup milk 1 (2.8-ounce) can French fried onions salt and ground black pepper to taste Directions: Gather all ingredients. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Mix green beans, condensed cream of mushroom soup, milk, and 1/2 of the fried onions in a 1.5-quart casserole dish. Bake in the preheated oven until heated through and bubbly, about 25 minutes. Sprinkle remaining onions on top and return to the oven for 5 minutes. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Let rest for a few minutes before serving. 🧑‍🍳: Nicole #thanksgiving #greenbeancasserole #greenbeans #thanksgivingsides

Vegetable casseroles

Green bean casserole

"This is the best green bean casserole recipe, it does use the canned onions but you make your own cream of mushroom and it's soooo good. I've made it on random weekends, it's not just a Thanksgiving food. I don't know much about older foods, I just really wanted to share that recipe."

Corn casserole

"Our family Corn custard doesn't have crackers but we double the recipe and there's never any left over. 2 eggs, 1 cup of sweetened condensed milk, 1/2 flour, 2 T soft butter, 1 tsp sugar, 1 can of creamed corn, 1 can of whole corn. Mix all together and bake in a 8x8 about 45 min at 350. Gotta have that!" - Psychological_Bat890

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Pets

5 dog breeds that form the strongest emotional bonds with their owners, according to a veterinarian

They are very good puppers.

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Dog breeds that form strong emotional bonds with owners.

Dogs are arguably the most loyal pets. Besides being goofy and always a reliable source of entertainment, dogs are the ultimate companions. But did you know certain dog breeds form deeper, stronger emotional ties to their owners than others?

"Like people, dogs are individuals with their own unique temperaments and personalities," Dr. Liza Cahn, DVM, a veterinarian at Embrace Pet Insurance, tells Upworthy. "There are certain breeds known to bond especially deeply with their owners, many of which have a history of working closely and cooperatively with people."

She explains that strong emotional bonds are also influenced not only by breed, but by other factors such as early life experiences, socialization, training, age, and health status.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Dr. Cahn adds that there are definite signs that your dog is strongly bonded to you.

"Regardless of breed, signs that you and your dog have a strong bond include seeking out attention, play, and physical contact, relaxed body language in your presence, frequently checking in with you, and going to you for comfort," she says.

The following are five dog breeds that typically build the strongest emotional bond with their owners.

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Golden Retriever

According to Dr. Cahn, Golden Retrievers are "famously gentle and loyal, known for their joyful and boisterous playfulness and affection. Goldens were bred as hunting dogs, are highly intelligent, and have a strong desire to please. Their natural friendliness and outgoing personalities make them excellent family pets. Many Goldens demonstrate tight bonds through gentle eye contact, bringing toys to initiate play, and following their owners from room to room."

Labrador Retriever

Labs are another breed that are known to form strong emotional bonds with their owners.

"Bred as versatile working dogs, Labs are intelligent and easy to train (highly motivated by both food and human affection). Their playful and outgoing personality means they usually get along well with children and other animals, and they enjoy an active lifestyle by their owner’s side," says Dr. Cahn. "They show their bond through constant tail-wagging, leaning against their owners, and eagerness to participate in any activity together. Labs are often prone to obesity and joint issues, so regular veterinary care and portion control are important."

Vizsla

If you own a Vizsla, this will not be a surprise to you.

"Vizslas are often nicknamed 'Velcro dogs' because their deep bond and attachment to their human family members cause them to stick close," Dr. Cahn explains. "They were originally bred for falconry and love working closely with humans, a trait that has translated into a desire for constant companionship. These highly affectionate dogs also require extensive physical exercise and mental stimulation, and can be prone to separation anxiety."

@drkatrinawarren
Velcro Dogs - a dog can be clingy for lots of reasons eg.lack of socialisation, anxiety, a traumatic or learnt behaviour but some dog breeds are more likely to be ‘velcro dogs’ #velcrodogs #dogbreeds #cockerspaniel

Cavalier King Charles Spaniel

With such a lovable face, it's no wonder that the Cavalier King Charles Spaniel is known to be tight with its owners.

"Bred over centuries to be the ultimate companion dog, these sweethearts are bright, affectionate, and curious. They can thrive in just about any environment as long as they receive plenty of love and attention," Dr. Cahn notes. "Cavaliers form exceptionally close attachments and love to cuddle, rest their head on their owner’s lap, and maintain eye contact. Their gentle temperament and eager-to-please attitude make them deeply attuned to their person’s emotions."

She also adds that finding a reputable breeder is critical due to their predisposition to a heart condition affecting the mitral valve, as well as a neurological condition called syringomyelia.

Cocker Spaniel

According to Dr. Cahn, both English and American Cocker Spaniels are gentle and happy dogs.

"They have a long history of working closely with human partners and thrive on love and attention," she says. "Cockers often express their bond by wagging their entire body, shadowing their owners around the house, and greeting them enthusiastically. Keep an eye out for symptoms of ear infections, which are common due to their long, floppy ears."

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Introverts can be stellar networkers with 6 small shifts in their habits and mindset

Introverts are better networkers than people think, especially when they play to their strengths.

networking, introverts, socializing, professional network, communication skills

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Introverts have a lot of strengths that make them good networkers.

If you want to send most introverts running for the hills, all you have to do is mention the word "networking." The term immediately conjures images of large rooms full of people mingling, making small talk and selling themselves, all of which is nightmare fuel for those of us who thrive on intimate spaces with close friends and plenty of time alone.

The entire concept of networking may seem custom suited to social butterflies, therefore giving them an advantage in the professional world, but introverts need not give up on the idea altogether. Introverts are not inherently bad at networking; in fact, when they play to their strengths, introverts can make the best networkers.

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Think quality, not quantity

The idea of milling around a big room of people, meeting as many potential connections as possible, is anathema to an introvert's nature. Give yourself permission to not even try to do that. Make it a goal to talk to three people and three people only.

"Rather than expending your energy talking to as many people as possible, play to your strengths and aim to forge strong bonds with a smaller group of people," suggests EHL Graduate School.

Making three solid connections is far more doable for introverts than collecting as many business cards and contacts as possible.

Lean into listening and empathy

Most introverts have key people skills that may not be as flashy as charm and charisma, but ultimately lead to stronger connections. Usually, introverts are excellent listeners, and combined with empathy, that skill is incredibly valuable in networking. After all, what is networking but relationship-building, and what is better for relationship-building than stellar listening and empathy skills?

networking, introverts, socializing, professional network, communication skills Introverts tend to be good at listening and empathy.Photo credit: Canva

Arrive early and leave early

EHL Graduate School suggests introverts arrive at networking events early, when there are fewer people there, and leave early before their social battery runs out. If you're going with the "get to know three people" approach, there's no harm in leaving early.

Own the follow-up

Grace McCarrick, who speaks on workplace soft skills, shared one of the strengths she sees in introverts:

"An introvert is the kind of person who will meet you at an event, not really say too much, then follow up with an email or a Linkedin message and say, 'Great to meet you. Here's an article on this thing we were talking about.' I'm sorry, that is elite. That is elite level."

networking, introverts, socializing, professional network, communication skills A lot of introverts struggle with networking.Photo credit: Canva

Practice a few key social skills ahead of time

Sometimes introversion gets conflated with shyness or social anxiety, but regardless of how these things might overlap, practicing a few key skills can help anyone feel more confident going into a socializing situation. If you struggle with starting conversations, prepare a few conversation starters ahead of time. If you don't know how to leave a conversation, practice some key phrases for ducking out. If nervousness is your nemesis, learn some confident body language tricks to get over (or at least cover up) your imposter syndrome.

Ditch 'events' altogether and focus on one-on-ones

Networking doesn't have to involve going to events or gatherings and overtaxing yourself socially. At its core, networking is just connecting with people, and you can just as easily do that with one-on-one meetings, lunches, or coffee dates. Seek out people you want to make connections with online and reach out personally. That might still be a bit nerve-racking, but for introverts it's often a better tack to take than torturing yourself with big events with too many people.

networking, introverts, socializing, professional network, communication skills One-on-one networking is preferable for introverts.Photo credit: Canva

Introverts aren't inherently bad at networking. In fact, there's an argument to be made that introverts make the best networkers in the long run, as they tend to make deeper than surface-level connections and excel at relationship-building.

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