Generation gaps are nothing new, but the tech age can make those gaps feel quite wide. However, technology can unite as much as it can divide. One powerful way to bring the generations closer together is to embrace and utilize the tech-savviness of younger generations in the service of preserving family history.
If there’s anything Gen Z knows, it’s how to make a video with a smartphone. And if there’s anything Boomers know and love, it’s talking about the good old days. With a little scripting and guidance, families can combine those two things to build strong bonds and create a lasting record of family stories through interviews.
Helping young people ask the right questions
Some teens and young adults are talkative and inquisitive enough that saying, “Hey, why don’t you interview Grandma and Grandpa?” is enough to get the ball rolling. But a lot of younger people might hesitate because they don’t know what questions to ask.
That’s where the middle-aged parents can help. Coming up with questions together can be a fun exercise if kids are up for it. Encouraging younger folks to approach their elders with curiosity can help them formulate their own questions. Parents can try prompts like “What have you always wondered about living in the 1950s?” or “Have you ever thought about what it was like to grow up with no internet?” to help younger folks think of questions to ask.
However, there’s also nothing wrong with providing a list of questions to take the pressure off. Even professional interviewers don’t always come up with their own questions, so no need to expect kids to. Plus, having precanned questions allows young people to focus more on other elements of the interview they might prefer, like setting, lighting, camera angles, or sound.
10 questions for young people to ask their grandparents
For a good place to start, Dave Isay of StoryCorps shares five questions to ask older people so you can record their answers for posterity. Each question serves a purpose, helping elders unlock memories and offering plenty of opportunity to expound on them:
1. What was your childhood like?
2. Tell me about the traditions that have been passed down through our family. How did they get started?
3. What are your most vivid memories of school?
4. How did you meet your wife/husband/partner?
5. What piece of wisdom or advice would you like to share with future generations?
Beyond those questions, there are endless possibilities. However, too many questions can be overwhelming, so limiting the list is helpful for everyone. Here are five more questions to consider adding to the list if time and energy allow for it:
6. What were some of the most defining or important moments in your life?
7. Describe a typical summer day when you were a teenager. What did you do?
8. Tell me about your siblings. What were they like when you were growing up?
9. What was your first job and how did you get it?
10. If you could go back to any time in your life for one day, what would you choose to relive and why?
There are no rules about when and where to conduct this kind of interview, but family reunions, holidays, or even just a Zoom for FaceTime call on a random Tuesday are all great times to make it happen.
Additional considerations for doing grandparent interviews
Start the interview by having the grandparent state their full name, date of birth, and where they were born. If nothing else, it’s good to have those details on record.
Also have them list their spouses, any former spouses, and children’s names. When future generations watch these videos, it will help orient them in the family tree and timeline.
Older people often have times of day when they’re more energetic and times when they get tired, so timing the interview wisely can be important. Make sure they’ve eaten and have something to drink on hand.
Pay attention to their energy. Pulling up old memories can be fun, but there may be painful memories mixed up in there, too. Both take energy to relive. Breaking the interview into a few different sessions might be preferable, depending on the person.
Be patient. Let kids know that periods of silence are normal and to just wait them out. Try to enjoy the slow pace of memories unfolding and being shared.
Finally, don’t wait. Ask these questions while elders are physically and cognitively able to enjoy the experience and offer the most. Time passes faster than we think, and we need to take advantage of the time we have with them while we have it.
