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She ditched a 9-5 to act. Now she's starring in 'Crazy Rich Asians.' Here's her story.

When Tan Kheng Hua was offered the role of Kerry Chu in "Crazy Rich Asians," she didn't hesitate to accept it.

Though the Singaporean actress has certainly made a name for herself on big screens in southeastern Asia, the opportunity to act in a major U.S. film — a historic film at that — was a unparalleled opportunity.

"Did we honestly have to wait so long for an all-Asian Hollywood film to come out?" Tan asks me during our candid interview.

[rebelmouse-image 19477817 dam="1" original_size="735x448" caption="All images courtesy of "Crazy Rich Asians"/Warner Bros." expand=1]All images courtesy of "Crazy Rich Asians"/Warner Bros.

"Crazy Rich Asians" is the first Hollywood film to feature a predominately Asian cast in more than 20 years.

Based on the beloved book, "Crazy Rich Asians" follows Rachel Chu and Nick Young through a meet-the-parents summer in Singapore. Unbeknownst to Rachel, though, the parents she's meeting are excessively wealthy and raised her boyfriend in a literal castle. Helping her navigate this unexpected terrain is her fierce and firm mom, Kerry.

The character Kerry Chu.

Kerry Chu is the opposite of the overbearing, only-grades-matter Asian tropes usually shown in U.S. film and television.

Kerry offers a refreshing and not-typically-seen representation of balanced parenting, something that reminded Tan of raising her own children.

"My relationship with my daughter is very similar to the one that Carrie has with Rachel in that verbal communication is a tool," she explains. "We talk to each other, we verbalize feelings, we express our wants and needs of each other. And this verbal communication is something that I consider is actually very Western. And my own parents who are very [stereotypically] Asian brought me up in a completely different way and in a very Asian way."

Tan further explains her definition of parenting "the Asian Way," saying:

"As a child I was expected to do a lot of housework and expected to come home every day at dinner time and have a meal and to sit down at the table with my entire family. Let me just tell you, I love my parents to death. They are the best parents in the world. But, times have changed ... and contemporary Western culture has changed many of the traditional Asian ways of a leading life."

As a former marketing professional, Tan's dedication to excellence and bucking the status quo has been a decades-long endeavor.

"I went to Indiana University at Bloomington and I got myself a Bachelor of Science, but in my heart, I'd always loved the arts," she says. "I loved my job, don't get me wrong. I was also good at it. But I thought to myself,  'I have devoted most of the hours of my day to this corporate job and devoted also a large portion of my time to my passion — which was acting — and I've got enough money saved up. Why don't I try to just see what it feels like to wake up in the morning and to be a indulging this passion for acting for the whole day?'"

Since that decision, Tan has appeared in a number of films and shows, such as her role as Margaret Phua in "Phua Chu Kang Pte Ltd," Ali Tan in "Cages," and the Empress Dowager in "Marco Polo."

But now, she's stepped into another world in "Crazy Rich Asians."

Tan joins a cast that hails from Malaysia, Taiwan, and Singapore, nodding to the diversity inherent of Asian identities.

As a supporting actress in the highly anticipated film, Tan has been surrounded by a work energy that she hasn't seen in her career, largely because the people that play the characters actually reflect the characters in the book.

"What matters is that a group of people are coming together," Tan says. "A group of people who have immense talent, at all levels, from all over the world coming together to tell this story that was so beautifully put together and a story about culture that I am a part of, that I feel has never been told."

And as for the future? Tan dreams of one where it doesn't take nearly 30 years for another all-Asian film to be greenlit by Hollywood.

"I would like audiences to look at 'Crazy Rich Asians' and to enjoy the movie and to see how good it is," she says, "and hopefully one day just be able to just look at pieces of work and just say, 'Oh wow, it was good. It's so well-made. It's so funny.' And [I want people to] not just keep dividing the world into races and faiths. I would also like everybody to see talent — and not just for my own country — but from around the world."

Joy

A woman accidentally said, 'Love you!' to an important client. His response was perfect.

He even followed up with a heartwarming e-mail.

Photo credit: Canva

Saying "I love you!" by accident is one of life's most cringe moments.

For many of us, telling our friends and family that we love them is second nature. Every time someone leaves the house, "Love you!" Before bed at night, "Love you!" Getting off a call with them, "Love you!"

That's all well and good until that sweetly ingrained habit spills over into your work life. Especially when you're talking to an important client, where the boundaries of professional conduct are particularly important to uphold. (Do you feel the cringe coming?)

I Love You Elf GIF by MOODMANGiphy

A woman shared an oh-so-human story about absent-mindedly telling a client she loved him, and his thoughtful response has people cheering.

"Accidentally said 'Love you!' at the end of a call with an important client yesterday," wrote a Reddit user. "I heard him giggle as I hung up, and I was mortified. Today, I saw he emailed me this:"

The email began, "Hey—Just wanted to say that I didn't mean to laugh at you when you accidentally signed off on our call with a 'love you.' I just found it funny because I've definitely done that before, and I know it happens."

Okay, phew, he understood that the laughing was mortifying and he wasn't bothered by the "love you." But then he added the absolute best thing he could have said about the situation:

"I'm glad you have enough love in your life that that response comes naturally. If anything, you should be proud of that. :)"

Then he mercifully resumed their professional conversation. "Have a great weekend! We'll follow up about my call with Chris on Wednesday, as discussed."

embarrassing story, saying I love you on accident, workplace stories, professional communication"Love you!" Oops.Photo credit: Canva

He didn't just ignore the elephant in the room and let it hang over her like an awkward cloud. He put her at ease, letting her know he's done it before and it happens and is no big deal. But then he took it a step further, adding a deeper human layer to the moment by acknowledging the fact that the words flowing so automatically and easily for her meant she was surrounded by love.

The client's emotional intelligence and thoughtful response warmed people's hearts.

"What a great and respectful response. He is completely right, it’s such a beautiful thing to have that much love in your life that it comes out naturally."

"You work with good people."

"Honestly, this made my day 😂 It's so wholesome how they responded. Shows that a little kindness (even accidental) always leaves a good impression!"

"Such a classy response. Made you feel at ease while staying professional and moving the conversation forward."

"Green flags from that client."

Green Flag GIF by The Last Talk ShowGiphy

People also shared their own similar experiences with blurting out accidental "love you"s and it was a veritable love-fest:

"I told my supervisor I loved her at the end of our weekly touch point call - she chuckled and said she loved me too. We shared a good laugh. I am happy to see empathy from a random human, it is much needed."

"I said 'love you' to my new boss at labcorp when she called me to tell me I passed my drug test. Same thing, hanging up, not thinking, she gave me my results and my start date to come in for orientation and I ended the call with 'bye love you!'"

"Back in the day I straight up called one of my bosses mom. It was so embarrassing I almost died."

"A surprising number of people have done this at least once. Happens when you’re distracted and tired. My ex husband (a prosecutor) accidentally ended a phone call with 'I love you' when talking to a rural county sheriff in the middle of the night."

Embarrassed Hide GIF by florGiphy

"I had a coworker say 'love you,' just as we were about to hang up. There was an awkward pause, clearly neither of us had hung up, then he added, 'Don’t tell my wife.' We both laughed and finally disconnected."

"I did that with my ex husband last Thursday, we both burst out laughing lol. Happily we get along great and he and his fiancée are attending my wedding next week."

"Was on phone with my boss right after he had called his wife. He ended the call with "love you." Had so much fun telling him that while I cared for him, I didn't think it was love."

Embarrassing moments don't have to ruin your day—in fact, when handled like this client, they can turn into beautiful moments of human connection. This kind of relatability, empathy, and emotional intelligence makes us all feel better about our shared humanity, oopsies and all.

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Mental Health

Cole Escola's touching insight about dementia has people moved to tears

"We were meeting in the middle of her memory."

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Cole Escola poses in front of a bright wall.

How many people can say they were a finalist for a Pulitzer Prize for a comedy they wrote? What if the comedy was a re-imagining Mary Todd Lincoln as a resentful manic-pixie dream girl with a drinking problem and dreams of becoming a cabaret star? Cole Escola can. (It's a very small, specific list.)

Cole (who uses they/them pronouns) is the writer and star of the Tony-nominated Broadway hit Oh Mary! and simply never stops pushing boundaries. But as hilarious as they are, they are equally as vulnerable and thoughtful when it comes to sensitive life issues. Always a writer, Cole sees the world through an extremely unique, one-of-a-kind lens and pushes people to think about comedy, tragedy, love, adversity, addiction, death, and everything in between in a way not often seen.

Just this past week, Cole gave a candid interview to Mo Rocca on CBS Sunday Morning. One topic they discussed is how, after a traumatic event with their father at around age five, they moved in with their grandmother. Cole explains, "She had the early stages of Alzheimer's, so she would repeat stories a lot. But I loved them. I loved her stories."

"I realize now that when she would tell these stories, we were meeting in the middle of her memory. She was living out the fantasy of her childhood, and I was also living out my fantasy of being a young girl on a farm in Alberta." When asked if they minded being told the same story, Cole answered, "No. I loved it."

The comment section, just from this clip alone, generated a lighthouse of support. One person writes, "Just when you think you can’t love Cole anymore, they drop something like this that gives you another level of respect for them." Like many, people acknowledge how inspired and moved Cole makes them, whether through laughter or tears. "You’ve made me laugh for years and now you’ve made me cry."

But it's from the standpoint of Cole's love and respect for their grandmother that seems to truly resonate. "So beautiful. Cole is a treasure, and it sounds like their grandmother was too." And as a grandmother themselves, this commenter shares, "Littles love to hear stories over and over. My grandbaby says 'Keep telling me the story, I want to hear it again and again!' So adorable. Glad you were able to find comfort with your gramma."

Using storytelling as a healing device for people with types of dementia and their loved ones and caregivers is popular among many doctors and therapists. It's not just reading and sharing stories with the patients, but letting them share their stories, too. A 2012 NPR: article notes that, "Storytelling is one of the most ancient forms of communication—it's how we learn about the world. It turns out that for people with dementia, storytelling can be therapeutic. It gives people who don't communicate well a chance to communicate. And you don't need any training to run a session."

stories, storytelling, elderly people, dementia, therapyTwo elderly people have a conversation. Photo by Cristina Gottardi on Unsplash

The piece also cites Anne Basting, the founder of a program called TimeSlips, whose aim is to help empower people to use stories to express themselves, no matter their memory ability. "Our bold vision is that creative expression, growth, and meaning is available to us all at every stage of life, wherever we live and whatever our abilities," they share.

Basting explains, "People with dementia start to forget their social role; they might not remember they're a spouse...a parent. They need a social role through which they can express who they are, and the role of storyteller really supplies that."

Cole Escola, even at a very young age, tapped into this empathetic wisdom. They continue to lovingly honor their grandmother by being an incredible storyteller in their own right.

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Pets

Woman builds an elaborate hotel in her yard for stray cats to stay cozy through the winter

People are calling it "Hotel Catifornia" and "The Fur Seasons."

Images via Canva

A woman in China provides a cozy home for stray cats in her neighborhood.

When winter comes around, people may wonder how stray animals stay warm and safe. Stray cats in particular are highly adaptable creatures and their home is the great outdoors, so most of the time there's not much that people need to do to protect them. But when temperatures dip to dangerous levels, caring humans naturally want to make sure strays have a place to go to get out of the harsh elements.

One woman has taken that desire to a whole new level with an elaborate cat apartment she built for the many stray cats in her neighborhood. We're not just talking about a shelter–it's like luxury hotel living for her feline friends. The apartment has multiple rooms, cushy blankets that get taken out and cleaned, and even a temperature-controlled water source so they're always able to find drinking water in frigid temps.

Check this out:

The woman who built the apartment actually lives in China and was sharing her videos on TikTok, but it seems her account has since been deactivated. This hasn't stopped people from talking about her and her impressive project, though. This thread on TikTok contains updates about the cat hotel from people finding and reposting the adorable story.

Welcome to the Meowtel Catifornia

Of course, the clever hotel jokes and puns started rolling in first thing:

'Welcome to the hotel catifornia."

"Such a lovely place."

"They can check out any time but they won't ever leave ^^"

"I prefer Hotel Calicofornia."

"Meowriott."

"Given my skill, mine would be more like Meowtel 6."

"Pawliday Inn.'

"The Fur Seasons."'

"Meowne Plaza."

People loved seeing the care and ingenuity she put into the "meowtel," as well as how happy the cats seem with the arrangement. In fact, some people were sure their own house cats would move out just to go live in this kind of cat commune.

"My cat just looked at me and sighed…"

"All the neighbours be looking for their cats and they’ve bailed to live at the kitty motel."

"They’d pack their little bags and move in without a second thought."

"They wouldn't even wait to pack their bags."

"Alright Carol it’s been real but we’re gonna head out. Found a great deal on a luxury apartment so yanno… take care."


Cats live where they want when they want

cats, stray cats, pet cats, felines, kittiesKitten snuggled in a person's arms. Image via Canva.

Those people may have been joking, but several others shared that their cats really did ditch them to go live with neighbors who had more desirable living situations.

"I’ve had two cats do this. One was annoyed at our second dog’s puppy energy so she moved in with an older lady a street over. We used to see her all the time until she passed. The other missed our kids being little so she moved next door where there’s a little girl. We talked to both neighbors and said if they get sick of them to let us know and we’ll take them back but both lived the rest of their lives with their new families."

"One of our cats moved next door because he loves children and wanted to be with the little girl next door. Because it’s a very small village, he goes to the school most days to wait for her and they come home together. School is 3 buildings away."

"We had a cat do the same thing about 20 years ago. She hated the barks of our new puppy and would put her paw on his mouth to try and stop it. One day, she slipped outside and I found her a month later, two streets over, hanging with a couple who didn’t have a dog. They said she just showed up at the door and moved in. I gave them all her cat food and hope she had a nice quiet life."

Is it a bad idea to feed and shelter stray cats?

cats, stray cats, feeding cats, feral cats, shelter catsCats eating kibble on the street.Image via Canva

People have differing opinions about whether it's good to feed stray cats or not, as cats can cause problems for local wildlife and it's not great to encourage an increasing stray cat population. According to Catster, in the United States alone, an estimated four billion birds and 22 billion mammals (such as mice, voles, rabbits, and shrews) are killed annually by both domestic and stray cats. In Canada, cats are the number one of killer of birds, killing "between 100 and 350 million birds every year." These numbers are staggering, but the bird and small mammal populations can be protected if stray cats are cared for responsibly: namely, spaying and neutering those in your area to cut down on the population and finding homes for those who are friendly and comfortable with humans.

According to the Feral Cat Coalition of Oregon, here are the best practices for feral and stray cats:

- Spay/neuter to prevent additional litters

- Find homes for friendly cats

- Feed outdoor cats on a schedule

- Remove food & dishes when they are done eating

- Pick up scraps and keep the feeding area tidy

- Provide fresh water

- Provide a warm place for the cats to sleep

So, go ahead and care for those kitties and keep them warm through the winter—just make sure they can't make any more kittens.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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Movies

One item from 'When Harry Met Sally' bonds Gen Z and Boomers, and it's probably not what you'd think

TikTokers branded it a "winter essential."

via Canva, Castlerock Entertainment
Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal crouch down.

Billy Crystal wasn't the first in line to play Harry Burns in the 1989 rom-comWhen Harry Met Sally. Not by a long shot. In fact, director Rob Reiner considered Albert Brooks, Tom Hanks, Harrison Ford, Michael Keaton, Richard Dreyfuss, and Bill Murray for the part before him. Incidentally, according Business Insider, Albert Brooks thought it was too much like a "Woody Allen film," and Hanks believed it to be too "lightweight."

Crystal, who was best friends with Reiner, wound up exceeding expectations to pull out an iconic, grumpy performance that even the most cynical person could love.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Well, not everyone loved it. Just last year, a tweet went viral that revealed many Gen Z-ers had a real tough time with Billy Crystal as a leading man. And they weren't being especially shy about it. Emily Lefroy writes for Daily Mail, "The debate began after X user Zoe Rose Bryant responded to a post asking users to share the 'romcom scene that literally changed the trajectory of your life.'" Zoe then posted a clip from the Nora Ephron-penned classic and wrote, "You simply can't beat the blueprint."

The comment section disagreed, with many claiming Billy wasn't attractive enough for Meg Ryan's Sally. Ouch.

In the subreddit r/unpopularopinion, someone posted a similar sentiment claiming in part, "Harry's character is very unattractive, largely because he is a rude and condescending person. Sally is beautiful but annoying. The romantic scenes are cringy, mostly because Harry is such a jerk and so unappealing as a romantic lead."

This young Millennial writes, "I just tried to watch it for the first time (I'm 32), and I just couldn't do it. It's such a slog. I made it to right after they sleep together, and I had to stop it to take a break and watch something else… Harry is a d#$k and Sally just sucks."

They didn't like the deli orders either. "The way she places orders at restaurants isn't quirky, it's just awful." And they even had a note for the music composer: "Also, why is this movie so quiet? It might be an '80s thing, but the lack of a background score makes the scenes feel so awkward and cringe. I don't want to hear the click-clack of their shoes when they walk. And I certainly don't want to hear how wet their kissing is."

When Harry Met Sally, Castlerock Entertainment, Iconic movie scene, Meg RyanMeg Ryan sits at a diner in "When Harry Met Sally."Giphy

This Redditor agrees: "Honestly, I think it's a movie for Boomers who thought it was groundbreaking to show a man and a woman trying to be friends."

As if a Boomer just heard their name and perked up, they emphatically enter the chat, explaining, "The arrogant, self-centered character trait is the key issue! They’re young and dumb! Just like I was and practically everyone else I know when they were young. I’m in my sixties now. Young people mostly go through life with their heads shoved far up their a$es. Both sexes. It takes time and hard experience to pull their heads out. I don’t know if you’re young—don’t take this as a personal insult. But Harry is a spot-on portrayal of myself and Sally is my wife."

There's more. In a different thread entitled "What exactly is so amazing about When Harry Met Sally," a Millennial writes, "I watched it recently for the first time. I was born after it was released if that matters—if it was considered a movie of its time. I just don't really see the magic in it… I just don't really feel a yearning for Harry and Sally to fall in love."

This time, fellow Redditors really take the time to teach the OP, with one even including a character analysis for both Harry and Sally. Once the OP understands that Harry is like "this generation's Chandler Bing," they get a better overall grasp of the role, but still don't love the film.

One thing that does unite Gen Z with their older counterparts? Harry's sweater. Lydia Hawken writes for Mail Online that "TikTokers have rebranded the cable knit jumper (sweater) a 'winter essential.'"

Maybe we'll never prove that men and women can just be friends. But we do know that fashion trends can cross the generational aisle in the best of ways.

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Friendship

Mom sends life-changing text to her son's friend who stood by him during severe depression

Watching your child suffer from mental illness is incredibly difficult.

Photo credit: Canva

Depression can be isolating and take a toll on friendships.

Any parent who has had a child struggling with mental health knows how helpless it can make you feel. You want to fix it, to kiss the boo-boo and make it all better, but you can't. Finding and getting the help your child needs, whether they're 7 or 27, can be a long, frustrating process, and seeing your kid suffering in the meantime is incredibly difficult.

They say it takes a village, and that's especially true when mental health issues disrupt your child's life. Having other people love and support your loved one who is struggling is huge, whether it's other family members, community members, or friends. That's why a mom reaching out to her son's friend who had been by their side through a severe depression resonates with so many.

A person shared on Reddit that they had received a text from their friend's mom after the friend had been through a bout of depression. It read:


"This is _____'s mom. Just wanted to say thank you from the bottom of my heart for standing by my child through their toughest times. Seeing my child struggle was the most painful experience of my life. Your presence, patience, and support meant the world. You've been a true blessing and I'll forever be grateful to you as I can see my child smile again. May you always be surrounded by love, kindness and compassion you selflessly gave to my child. You have been a blessing in our lives."

Helping someone with depression is not easy, no matter who you are. Friends and family often don't know what to do and can end up distancing themselves or responding in a way that's not helpful. It's clear that the mom recognized this fact and expressing her gratitude is a beautiful way of acknowledging the difference this friend made.

depression, mental health, mental illness, support, friendship, hugHaving someone stay by your side through depression is a gift.Photo credit: Canva

People were moved by the mom's message and the evidence of the friend's staunch support.

"Oh 100% would uuuuugly-sob if I got a text like this! What a thoughtful acknowledgement and message of gratitude. Clearly, you are a wonderful and empathetic friend! 💕"

"I'm stifling back tears. I have no doubt that the loving treatment you gave this child was its own reward; however, this beautifully written note is touching and uplifting. Empathy and kindness should be acknowledged. You are both lovely and safe people. I can only wish you and your kids the best, and maybe a growing friendship. Kudos!"

"100% chance that their mom was ugly crying writing this. Experiencing suffering yourself is one thing, but the helplessness of watching your child suffer is excruciating. OP, thanks for being a ray of sunshine in stormy times for this family."

depression, mental health, mental illness, isolation, support, friendshipWatching your child struggle with mental health is painful.Photo credit: Canva

"Kinda like I am now. My Heart goes out to any mom who sees their child struggling, no matter what the age, and feel helpless. Then to have someone be able to provide support in a way that can only come from a friend and not a mom - it just wrecks me to think of how great of a gift it was."

"My adult son is struggling with depression. As a parent, it’s gut-wrenching. I mean, it’s harder for them than for me. But my heart is in a constant state of breaking."

"This clearly shows how you can be surrounded by the best people and still suffer from depression. If this parent shows this much love toward their child’s friend, I can only imagine how amplified it is toward their child who still had to work through it. What lovely people. I hope all involved are thriving."

It's a good reminder to do what we can for one another and to let people know when you see and appreciate their efforts for your loved ones. It truly takes a village for all of us to thrive.


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