How 'Crazy Ex-Girlfriend' is changing the game for bisexuality on TV.
Another reason 'Crazy Ex-Girlfriend' is a must-see.
If you only know bisexuality through your TV screen, you probably have a completely warped version of it.
To bisexuals living out here in the real world, I imagine that's been pretty damn frustrating.
GIF via "Flavor of Love."
I'm gay, so I have some understanding of what it feels like for Hollywood to hijack your sexual orientation, twist it into tired TV tropes (hilarious gay BFF, anyone?), and spit them out for the world to see.
But the industry has made strides in depicting gay characters as whole, complex humans. People who are bisexual though? Eh, not as much.
When bi characters actually do appear (it's still too rare), they often reflect stereotypes that range from ridiculous to downright harmful.
From Catherine in "Basic Instinct," who was a promiscuous serial killer...
Subtle, right? GIF via "Basic Instinct."
...to, more recently, Frank Underwood in "House of Cards" — a manipulative megalomaniac whose sexual fluidity is more about asserting power than an identity. Bisexuality hasn't gotten a fair shake.
GIF via "House of Cards."
Don't get me wrong. There's been primetime progress for bisexual characters in recent years on shows like "Grey's Anatomy," and you could argue simply having more roles like Mr. Underwood — a main character who isn't defined by his (bi)sexuality — is a good thing in and of itself.
There's a whole lot of room for improvement though — especially for male characters who are bi. And that's why I am living for "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend," a new series on The CW network. The show is a musical comedy, and it's a must-watch for many reasons, but mostly because it's smart, it's refreshing, and most importantly, it's super funny.
I'll admit, I was nervous, at first, when Darryl Whitefeather, a character on "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend" kissed another man.
Darryl is an awkward but earnest, middle-aged divorcé with a daughter. So when he kissed another male character on the show, it truly came out of nowhere.
I was excited to see "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend" was taking his character in an unexpected direction ... but I was also a bit concerned. Would this new storyline feed into the typical tropes about bisexuality like so many others involving bi characters? Would the writers find a way to kill him off in a random freak accident by the end of the episode? Would Darryl "realize he's gay" by next week?
But in each episode since, Darryl's revelation that he is bisexual (or "both-sexual" as he called it) has neatly avoided falling into any of those traps.
In fact, I'm damn-near over the moon to report that "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend" handled his coming out perfectly.
Photo courtesy of The CW, "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend," used with permission.
Darryl brilliantly comes out to his coworkers through a musical number (which you can watch below), while also shutting down many of the harmful myths that bisexual people are tired of hearing. Honestly, it may be the most impactful (and definitely the least-subtle) takedown of stigma around bisexuality in TV history to date.
The song is called "Getting Bi," and it speaks to all the ways bisexuality has been misrepresented since, like, forever.
Like, the fact that people assume people who are bisexual (especially men) are actually gay, that they're just confused, and that they haven't fully come out of the closet yet (which, of course, is complete bulls**t).
Darryl is pretty clear about what he thinks about that:
GIF via "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend."
Or the assumption that bisexuals are naturally more promiscuous than straight or gay folks (which, again, is utter nonsense).
Darryl hits the nail on the head here too:
GIF via "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend."
While Darryl, a middle-aged white lawyer, certainly doesn't represent every bi person or their experience, his character's slow discovery and embracing of his own bisexuality is challenging viewers — and the TV industry — to get smarter about sexuality and how it's portrayed in the media.
And it's about damn time.
Representation isn't just for show — it's critical in fighting inequality.
Seeing yourself in the leaders and change-makers around you — whether it's politicians in Washington or big-wigs in Hollywood — is important for everyone, regardless of skin color, sexual orientation, religious faith, or gender. Representation matters in shaping our world, and finally a show gets that (and didn't pull any punches) when it comes to bisexuality.



Student smiling in a classroom, working on a laptop.
Students focused and ready to learn in the classroom.
Fish find shelter for spawning in the nooks and crannies of wood.
Many of these streams are now unreachable by road, which is why helicopters are used.
Tribal leaders gathered by the Little Naches River for a ceremony and prayer.

Communications expert shares the perfect way to gracefully shut down rude comments
Taking the high ground never felt so good.
A woman is insulted at her job.
It came out of nowhere. A coworker made a rude comment that caught you off guard. The hair on the back of your neck stands up, and you want to put them in their place, but you have to stay tactful because you're in a professional setting. Plus, you don't want to stoop to their level.
In situations like these, it helps to have a comeback ready so you can stand up for yourself while making making sure they don't disrespect you again.
Vince Xu, who goes by Lawyer Vince on TikTok, is a personal injury attorney based in Torrance, California, where he shares the communication tips he's learned with his followers. Xu says there are three questions you can ask someone who is being rude that will put them in their place and give you the high ground:
Question 1: "Sorry, can you say that again?"
"This will either make them have to awkwardly say the disrespectful remark one more time, or it'll actually help them clarify what they said and retract their statement," Xu shares.
Question 2: "Did you mean that to be hurtful?"
The next step is to determine if they will repeat the disrespectful comment. "This calls out their disrespect and allows you to learn whether they're trying to be disrespectful or if there's a misunderstanding," Xu continues.
Question 3: "Are you okay?"
"What this does, is actually put you on higher ground, and it's showing empathy for the other person," Xu adds. "It's showing that you care about them genuinely, and this is gonna diffuse any type of disrespect or negative energy coming from them."
The interesting thing about Xu's three-step strategy is that by gracefully handling the situation, it puts you in a better position than before the insult. The rude coworker is likely to feel diminished after owning up to what they said, and you get to show them confidence and strength, as well as empathy. This will go a lot further than insulting them back and making the situation even worse.
Xu's technique is similar to that of Amy Gallo, a Harvard University communications expert. She says that you should call out what they just said, but make sure it comes out of their mouth. "You might even ask the person to simply repeat what they said, which may prompt them to think through what they meant and how their words might sound to others," she writes in the Harvard Business Review.
More of Gallo's suggested comebacks:
“Did I hear you correctly? I think you said…”
“What was your intention when you said…?”
“What specifically did you mean by that? I'm not sure I understood.”
“Could you say more about what you mean by that?”
Ultimately, Xu and Gallo's advice is invaluable because it allows you to overcome a negative comment without stooping to the other person's level. Instead, it elevates you above them without having to resort to name-calling or admitting they got on your nerves. That's the mark of someone confident and composed, even when others are trying to take them down.