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Health

Breakups just got a little easier, thanks to the luxurious, therapy-based Heartbreak Hotel

Welcome to the Heartbreak Hotel. It's part wellness retreat, part intensive group therapy.

healing, breakup, heartbreak hotel
Photo by Fa Barboza on Unsplash

Breakups are a low point for anyone, yet studies have shown that they tend to hit just women just a little harder. Which is probably why they leave a lot of us looking this:


via GIPHY

But what if we didn’t have to stuff our feelings down with a pint of Ben & Jerry’s (no offense Bridget Jones) and instead were able to come out of heartbreak feeling lighter, freer and more empowered?

That was the inspiration behind The Heartbreak Hotel.

The Heartbreak Hotel, which opened in north Norfolk, U.K. near the end of 2021, is a three-day retreat created by two mental health professionals with one goal in mind: to help women heal after the end of a relationship in the most compassionate, holistic way possible.

The retreat (keen on detoxification in all forms) is both alcohol- and technology-free. So if you’re looking to cope through drowning your sorrows with a mai tai or frantically hate-scrolling through your ex’s social media … then this might not be the spot for you.

However, if you are looking to stop blaming yourself for “what went wrong,” process complex and painful feelings, and come out rested and restored, read on.

During their three night stay, guests enjoy gourmet food, lush surroundings and daily beach walks along the gorgeous Norfolk coast.

I mean, just look at it. Stunning.

But don’t be misguided—it’s not just a luxury vacation. The Heartbreak Hotel is very much about doing the inner work.

Psychologist Alice Haddon and life coach/bestselling author Ruth Field—bona fide heartbreak specialists—teamed up to provide dynamic workshops where women can learn about love attachment styles, core needs, rewiring neural pathways and how to use all that information to redefine relationship goals.

In addition, an EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) specialist is there to assist in releasing emotional trauma. It’s a key element of the hotel’s offerings, as Haddon told Daily Mail. “At The Heartbreak Hotel we understand that where there is heartbreak there is trauma. This therapy helps our guests to gently but powerfully leave the shock behind and generate the space for forward looking energy,“ she said.

The Heartbreak Hotel’s first retreat in November 2021 was completely sold out, and the website boasts that an average of 85% felt freer, 66% felt clearer and 67% felt more empowered.

Their success does beg the question: Should traditional therapy get a rebrand?

Even those who do go into therapy post breakup normally only see a therapist once a week for an hour. To really see significant shifts could take … well, a lot longer than three days. The current price for a stay at the Heartbreak Hotel is £2,500 (or $3278), which may sound like a lot, but when broken down is about the average cost of six months worth of therapy.

Where there can never be an official timeline for overcoming heartbreak, perhaps there is an argument to be made for “turbo charged” recovery. The idea that it doesn’t have to take months upon months to move on is certainly an uplifting one.

Not to mention that a session usually takes place in a less-than-luxurious therapist’s office … if not through the other side of a computer screen. Even though there’s plenty of research to show how much of a positive impact nature can have on our well-being, it rarely has a place in traditional therapy. Unless your therapist is generous enough to have a ficus in the room.

Haddon and Field define therapy as “to take care of.” This includes providing the things that truly nourish the soul: beauty, comfort and serenity.

It’s not that someone can’t heal without these things, but it makes the healing process so much more enjoyable, doesn’t it? This could be a reason why many have trouble seeking professional help. They find the environment potentially sterile, which is not exactly the most attractive feature when we’re heartbroken.

As someone who has benefited greatly from wellness retreats (and have even run a few myself), I could be overly biased. But healing does take place on a mental, physical and emotional level. Dedicating an allotted time to focus on each of those aspects can be incredibly transformative, especially when we’re really going through it. It certainly has seemed to do wonders for the women of The Heartbreak Hotel.

Thank you to Haddon and Field for combining your expertise with creativity to make a painful transition an opportunity for incredible self-care.

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Modern Families

Mom calls out unfair 'double standard' of boomer grandparents who don't help with childcare

"I love my mom dearly, but I'm surprised at how little effort she puts in."

via Canva/Photos

A stressed mom and her happy, busy parents.

As far as generational stereotypes go, baby boomers (1946 to 1964) have often been accused of being a self-absorbed generation that has had no problem hoarding wealth, disregarding the environment, and prioritizing their own interests over their families. After all, they’re the generation that predominantly raised Gen X (1965 to 1980) and older millennials ('80s babies), also known as Gen Goonie, who were the least parented group of people in decades.

It’s unfair to paint an entire generation with the same brush. Still, the people who were once called the “Me Generation” are developing a reputation for being less involved in their grandchildren’s lives than their parents. The different grandparenting styles have been attributed to the fact that boomers worked longer and therefore want to enjoy their retirement. They also have more money than their parents to enjoy traveling and pursuing their hobbies. Those looking to take shots at boomers claim that they didn’t put a lot of effort into raising their kids, so why would they be any different with their grandkids?

boomers, grandparents, absentee grandparents, milennials, grandpa, grandmaBaby boomer grandparents.via Canva/Photos

A mother of one, who goes by TheCalmQuail on Mumsnet (a UK-based mothers' forum), made a controversial post, calling out a significant double standard when it comes to boomers. They had no problem having their parents help raise their kids, but they don’t want to extend the same courtesy to their children.

“It's come up in a few conversations with other parents recently about how little time their parents spend with their children, especially in comparison to when they were younger and at their grandparents' daily,” CalmQuail wrote. “Myself included, I avoided nursery completely when my mother went back to work because free daily childcare from a relative, and some of my happiest regular memories are spending regular one-on-one time with my Nana.”

“I realise grandparents are entitled to their own lives, but the lack of help does seem like double standards, when a large majority have seemingly had so much help themselves,” she continued.

stressed mom, young mom, stressed millennial, woman hands on her head, woman on couchA stressed mom with her head in her hands.via Canva/Photos

CalmQuail added that her mother lives up the road from her but still finds excuses not to help our child or even spend time with her kid. “It often feels like she's an extra toddler, as I have to suggest stuff to tempt her to do anything together; I manage the logistics, drive her there, etc. She will be there for emergency childcare requests when possible,” she continued. At the end of her post, she asked whether she was being unreasonable for thinking that her parents should put as much effort into raising their grandchildren as they had put into raising their parents.

The verdict: 68% thought she was NOT being unreasonable, and 32% felt that she was being unreasonable. Therefore, a majority of parents on the forum believe that Baby Boomers have the same responsibility to their grandchildren as the Silent Generation (1928 to 1945) did to theirs.

Many parents on the forum have experienced similar situations with their boomer parents and have given them a little grace by acknowledging that their grandparents didn’t have many resources or retirement expectations, so they dedicated their energy to their families.

stressed woman, tired mom, woman doing laundry, woman needs help, crying woman, folding laundryA stressed mom doing laundry.via Canva/Photos

“I know this will turn into a boomer bashing thread but my experience is my parents and their friends are early retirees with a fair bit of cash and feel they’ve earnt a nice easy long comfortable retirement (they have worked hard but only the same as us except we can’t afford a nanny, cleaner etc like they did…).so they’re busy on holidays, golfing, socialising,” a commenter wrote. “My grandparents were typical of their generation—very hard working, modest life, and incredibly family orientated, they had us every holiday.”

“I don’t think my grandparents had much in the way of expectations of retirement,” another commenter added. “They retired relatively early by today’s standards, and lived far longer than they expected. There wasn’t much of a sense of ‘enjoying your retirement’ by jetting off around the world or pursuing personal hobbies - they were always there and available.”

Ultimately, there’s nothing wrong with baby boomers enjoying their retirement, but their children have a right to feel a bit miffed by the shift in grandparenting priorities. As times change, so do expectations, but why does it feel like younger people are always getting the short end of the stick when it comes to life's necessities, such as childcare and the cost of living? Unfortunately, so many younger people feel like they have to go it alone. However, kudos to the boomer grandparents who do help out with childcare, just as their parents did. As they say, it takes a village to raise a child, and these days, our villages need to be growing instead of shrinking.

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Parenting

Gen X mom reenacts 'coming home from school in the 80s' and totally nails it

"This is why we're built different."

Photo credit: Canva

If you lived through an 80s childhood, this will send you back.

Generation X, made up of those born between 1965 and 1980, has many claims-to-fame in their younger years game. Gen X brought the world Prince and Kurt Cobain. We were The Goonies and The Breakfast Club.We took down the Berlin Wall while watching MTV.

But perhaps the most iconic thing about Gen X is our semi-feral childhoods of benign neglect. The standards of parenting and child rearing have shifted a lot in the past 40 to 50 years, as has the technological landscape that kids grow up in, so naturally, today's kids won't have the same childhoods previous generations had. But there's something particularly nostalgic about being a child of the 80s for those who lived it.

One mom nailed the experience with a video reenactment of what it was like to come home from school in the 80s. Elizabeth Stevens (@BennettPeach on YouTube) arrives at the front door in her backpack, then pulls out a house key on a string around her neck. (Ah, the "latchkey kid" era when children were expected to come home to an empty house and let themselves in.)

Then she goes into the kitchen in her Care Bears t-shirt and finds a handwritten note—in cursive, of course—on the back of an envelope. "Working late—make your own dinner, watch your brother and the dishes better be done when I get home from bowling. – Mom"

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

That's right. Mom wasn't just working late, she was also going bowling while her kids were home caring for themselves.

Then we see her washing the dishes despite barely being able to reach the faucet, even with a stool, and then her making a Gen X staple—the cinnamon-sugar and butter sandwich. On white bread, of course.

In just one minute, Stevens managed to capture the essence of so many Gen X memories, as commenters shared:

"The mom notes on an unopened bill is memories."

"Nailed it! The best thing about growing up in the '70s/'80's was being ALLOWED to grow up."

"Why this video made me almost cry?? How quiet it is inside the home. Lovely."

child doing dishes, 80s childhood, gen x childhoodKids did chores at home alone after school in the 80s. Photo credit: Canva

"Facts!!! No babysitter, go in the house, read the note, do the chores n not let anybody in!!!! I remember the homemade the 'cinnamon bun.'"

"70s and 80s … latch key kid here elementary, junior high and high school. we turned out self sufficient, independent and successful."

"Just so frickin on point!!! All of it from the clothes to the key on the necklace to the note. Even what you chose to do for a snack. Too good!!! The windbreaker that's memories. It's all coming back to me now lol thank you for this. You have brought a huge grin to both me and my inner child."

Ah, the 80s.Giphy

"I was met with a note everyday, too. On the back of an envelope, my daily chores would be listed. If I was in trouble, I would cry as soon as I saw the note....lolol Love you momma. How I wished I could have saved those notes! They were historical treasures."

Tons of people gushed over the nostalgia of remembering those "good old days" when they were given both freedom and responsibility, with many saying kids today have no idea. One thing that might surprise the younger generations was how young the theoretical kid in this video could have been. We're not talking about young teens here—kids as young as 5 or 6 could be latchkey kids, and kids any older than that were often given responsibility for looking after younger siblings. Even official babysitting jobs could start around age 11, or sometimes even younger.

Gen X kids had learned to take care of themselves early on, which has its pros and cons. The rose-colored glasses many Gen X adults view their childhoods through can sometimes cloud the parts that were not so great about growing up in the 70s and 80s. Sure, that benign neglect resulted in resilience and independence, but for some that came at the cost of parental relationships and a sense of safety and security. We have more knowledge now about things like mental health support, parent-child attachment, and healthy relationship dynamics, and some of that learning is reflected in shifting parenting practices.

As often happens, the pendulum may have swung too far from the absent parents of the 70s and 80s to the helicopter parents of the 90s and 2000s, of course, and the "right" approach (if there is one) probably lies somewhere in the middle. But it is still fun to look back on those iconic childhood experiences with joy and humor and appreciate that they helped us become who we are today.

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Fatherhood

Dad and daughter relationships perfectly  explained in 10 paintings

The bond between dads and daughters is amazing.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

It's hard to truly describe the amazing bond between dads and their daughters.

Being a dad is an amazing job no matter the gender of the tiny humans we're raising. But there's something unique about the bond between fathers and daughters. Most dads know what it's like to struggle with braiding hair, but we also know that bonding time provides immense value to our daughters. In fact, studies have shown that women with actively involved fathers are more confident and more successful in school and business.

You know how a picture is worth a thousand words? I'll just let these images sum up the daddy-daughter bond.

A 37-year-old Ukrainian artist affectionately known as Soosh, recently created some ridiculously heartwarming illustrations of the bond between a dad and his daughter, and put them on her Instagram feed. Sadly, her father wasn't involved in her life when she was a kid. But she wants to be sure her 9-year-old son doesn't follow in those footsteps.

"Part of the education for my kiddo who I want to grow up to be a good man is to understand what it's like to be one," Soosh told Upworthy.

There are so many different ways that fathers demonstrate their love for their little girls, and Soosh pretty much nails all of them.

Get ready to run the full gamut of the feels.

1. Dads can do it all. Including hair.

parenting, dads, daughters, fathers, art, artworkA father does his daughter's hairAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

2. They also make pretty great game opponents.



parenting, dads, daughters, fathers, art, artwork, chessA father plays chess with his daughterAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

3. And the Hula-Hoop skills? Legendary.



parenting, dads, daughters, fathers, art, artwork, hula hoopA dad hula hoops with his daughterAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

4. Dads know there's always time for a tea party regardless of the mountain of work in front of them.



A dad talks to his daughter while working at his deskAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


5. And their puppeteer skills totally belong on Broadway.



A dad performs a puppet show for his daughterAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


6. Dads help us see the world from different views.



A dad walks with his daughter on his backAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


7. So much so that we never want them to leave.



a dad carries a suitcase that his daughter holds ontoAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


8. They can make us feel protected, valued, and loved.



A dad holds his sleeping daughterAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


9. Especially when there are monsters hiding in places they shouldn't.



A superhero dad looks over his daughterAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


10. Seeing the daddy-daughter bond as art perfectly shows how beautiful fatherhood can be.



A dad takes the small corner of the bed with his dauthterAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


This article originally appeared nine years ago.

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Health

Family had a funeral for young mother, 7 months later, she was alive in Detroit

What a strange turn of events.

via Canva/Photos

A woman holding a rose at a funeral.

A family in Rochester, New York, is seething after going on an intense, four-year emotional rollercoaster, much of which could have been prevented. In July 2021, the family of Shanice Crews reported her missing after she abruptly disappeared, leaving two children behind. In April of 2024, police informed the family that she had passed away and her body was found in a Rochester lot.

To add further grief to their incredible loss, the family was told that she died from acute cocaine intoxication, even though they believed that Crews was never involved with the drug. “Reading the autopsy was traumatic. That was, it's one thing to hear it, you know what I’m saying, but then it’s another thing to actually read it, and then her name is attached to it,” Crews’ sister, Shanita Hopkins, told Rochester First. “So we thinking, this is how she died. And then we’re trying to think, did somebody like lace her, or is she doing this on her? It’s so much that goes into it. Your mind just goes crazy.”

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Because the body was in a state of advanced decomposition, authorities didn’t allow the family to see it. Still, they insisted that the dental records on the corpse matched. The family quickly had the body cremated and then, last summer, held a memorial service for Crews.

Then, last November, Hopkins received a shocking text from a person she did not know in Detroit. The text was accompanied by a photo of Crews looking happy and healthy. “Her first message is ‘Ma’am’ — with the picture of my sister – ‘Ma’am, I’m concerned, your sister is not dead. She just volunteered at my event today. This is just a random message,” Hopkins added.


The Monroe County Medical Examiner’s Office, which swore that the dental records were a match, conducted a DNA test on the unknown woman’s ashes. “We went the next day. They wanted my youngest sister because she and Shanice have the same mom and dad, and then they wanted her son. So both of them went and they did a DNA test, and when the results came back, they said it wasn’t it wasn’t a match,” Shanita says. “We dealt with the ashes and stuff–we put them in necklaces and we mixed my mom with this stranger…yes,” Shanita says.

The medical examiner’s office has offered to pay the family back for the cremation and funeral expenses, but the family wants more than that. They’ve recently hired a lawyer to examine the family’s options.

death certificate, pronounced death, certificates, legal documents, death, united statesA death certificate.via Canva/Photos

It will be interesting to see what difficulties Crews may experience after she has been declared deceased. In 2023, Phil Anderson was declared dead by the IRS and didn’t realize it until he tried to file his taxes, and his account was locked. His social security number was mixed up with his daughter’s, who had passed away from cystic fibrosis. Anderson had to reach out to his Congresswoman, Brittany Peterson, who represents Colorado’s 7th district, to have his IRS account unlocked. "Last time I checked, and in the immortal words of Monty Python, 'I'm not dead yet,'" he said, according to USA Today. Although it’s relatively rare for the US government to declare someone deceased incorrectly, it does happen. According to USA Today, 3.1 million deaths are reported to the Social Security Administration every year, and less than one-third of one percent ever need to be corrected.

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Parenting

Dad discovers his son has pinworms and pediatrician hits him with even worse news

Pinworms are super common and absolutely disgusting.

Justin and Dr. Key|TikTok
Dad discovers child has pinworms and it's freaking people out

If you're a parent you're likely in one of two categories: parents who have never heard of pinworms or parents who shuddered at the headline. Parents are not really given any sort of warning for all of the eyebrow raising situations that occur in childhood and one dad has found out that there was a lot left out of that non-existent parenting handbook. If you thought lice was bad, well, frankly, you have no idea.

Justin, a dad that runs the TikTok page parentingcheerleader took to social media to tell the world of the current nightmare fuel parenting situation he was experiencing. He's also doing parents on social media a solid by giving them a heads up on the disturbing secret plaguing the parenting world–pinworms.

The viral video starts out with no trigger warning before he says though clenched teeth, "my son has worms in his anus." Yeah, you read that right. It's a thing. A slightly terrifying but totally normal thing.


These don't look so bad until you realize where they live.By DPDx, PHIL - Public Domain

About 20% of kids will get pinworms at some point. They can affect anyone, but adults rarely get them because they generally have better hygiene habits and awareness about putting their hands in their mouth after touching surfaces. (You usually get a pinworm infection by accidentally swallowing the eggs. Yeah... sorry for that) The first signs will be an itchy butthole, trouble sleeping, and irritability or loss of appetite.

If you're a glutton for punishment, read on! Pinworms are hard to diagnose, for obvious reasons. They're very small and hard to see, plus they like to live in a very sensitive, hard to reach area. But they are visible to the naked eye, so diagnosis sometimes involves quite literally looking at a child's butt with a flashlight. Sometimes doctors will use tape to see if they can collect eggs from the area, which can be seen under a microscope.

No word from Justin on how he figured out that his kid had pinworms, but that's probably for the best.

"No one tells you about this stuff when you're thinking about being a parent but apparently it's like super normal for a child to just have worms in his booty hole," a flustered, baffled Justin says. In the video, he's on his way to pick up medicine for his kid while trying to somehow wrap his head around the reality of the situation.

@parentingcheerleader

Parenting truly is just one surprise after another. But the biggest surprise to me every time something crazy happens is that it is usually super common, just no one talks about it. So I’m warning you. Your child might get worms in their anus. #justinkellough #dadsoftiktok #parentsoftiktok #momsoftiktok #parentingadvice #parenting @Justin


Dr. Cerissa Key, a pediatrician, chimed in on Justin's disturbing revelation and assured him and every parent watching that pinworms are a common thing that happens in young children.

But she also dropped some info that other's including Justin may not have been ready to hear.

"Justin, sir. I hate to be the bearer of bad news. But if your son has worms in his booty hole, sir, politely and respectfully, you also have worms in your booty hole," Key reveals.

Key goes on to explain that kids are "disgusting" and don't wash their hands well so pinworms spread easily if a child at school or daycare has them. She advises that parents stock up on the chalky banana flavored medication that clears them up and to wash everything on hot while being sure to vacuum your floors well. Luckily, there are good over-the-counter options for suffering families, as well as stronger prescription methods available. Typically, medication can get rid of the pinworm infection pretty quickly.

People in the comment section of both videos were horrified that this was an actual thing while others commiserated with the stressed dad.

"I have no kids and now I'm paranoid I have pinworms with no symptoms," one person writes.

"I've raised 4 kids and never had this happen. Tomorrow this will be my entry on my gratitude journal," a mom confesses.

"Do I have kids? No...Do I even work around kids? Also no...do I still have the urge to take this medicine just in case anyways? 100000%," someone says.

Several people were forced to question if they even wanted kids anymore knowing there's a 20% chance they may have to deal with this at some point in the future.

@therealdrkey

#stitch with @Justin Allllll about pinworms! It your kid has them, YOU have them. 😩 #pinworms #pinworm #pediatrician #momlife #itchybottom #itchyvulva #pinwormssuck #parenting

Not everyone was stressed, some were thankful for the information. "Thank you! We haven't experienced pinworms yet, but super informative and helps to make parenting normalized," another commenter writes.

Key suggests that if your child has pinworms that the entire family should take a dose of the medication two weeks apart to make sure any left over newly hatched eggs are also killed. Why so thorough? Well, it's estimated that one pinworm (or threadworm) can lay up to 16,000 eggs.

And on that note...

spongebob, kids, parenting, pinworms, medical, health, medicine, pediatricianMeme Spongebob GIF by MOODMANGiphy

While you may not have been warned about pinworms, no one ever said parenting would be glamorous. It just seems people weren't prepared for how unglamorous it could get.

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