"I am not a babysitter or a mother and no woman should feel that they need to be."
On May 9, TMZ reported that Ariana Grande and her boyfriend of nearly two years, Mac Miller, had called it quits.
The following day she released a statement on the split in an Instagram story, calling Miller "one of my best friends in the whole world and favorite people on the planet," adding, "I respect and adore him endlessly and am grateful to have in my life in any form, at all times, regardless of how our relationship changes or what the universe holds for each of us!"
People grow, people change, and sometimes relationships come to an end. That's normal.
What's not normal is saying Grande had an obligation to stay in a relationship with Miller, as one Twitter user suggested. Grande explained why.
"Mac Miller totaling his G wagon and getting a DUI after Ariana Grande dumped him for another dude after he poured his heart out on a 10 song album to her called the divine feminine is just the most heartbreaking thing happening in Hollywood," Twitter user @FlintElijah posted.
This, in turn, prompted a response from Grande, slamming the culture of blaming and shaming women for the men in their life.
"How absurd that you minimize female self-respect and self-worth by saying someone should stay in a toxic relationship because he wrote an album about them, which [by the way] isn't the case (just ‘Cinderella’ is [about] me). I am not a babysitter or a mother and no woman should feel that they need to be. I have cared for him and tried to support his sobriety and prayed for his balance for years (and always will of course) but shaming/blaming women for a man's inability to keep his shit together is a very major problem. Let's stop doing that. Of course I didn't share about how hard or scary it was while it was happening but it was. I will continue to pray from the bottom of my heart that he figures it all out and that any other woman in this position does as well."
In this case, her response nails two key points about how we treat others:
First, it's not fair to expect someone to stay in a relationship they don't want to be in. Everyone is dealing with their own highs and lows. And secondly, we need to trust others to make decisions they feel are best for them, and support them through it all.
Grande performs at the 2018 Coachella Valley Music And Arts Festival. Photo by Christopher Polk/Getty Images for Coachella.
In the end, the original tweeter offered a sincere apology, which Grande accepted. He heard the message, and so should the rest of us.