To save his marriage, Terry Crews had to completely rethink what it means to be a man.

Crews showed his bravery in sharing his own #MeToo story. It turns out his own awakening started much earlier.

In October 2017, the actor made headlines when he opened up about having been sexually harassed by a Hollywood producer years earlier. It was an incredibly powerful moment that both showed the complexities of the #MeToo movement and helped bring more men into the fold as allies.

But it turns out Crews wasn't always such an evolved guy. He says that back in 2009, his wife nearly left him because of his own toxic masculinity, shaped by a lifetime of distorted ideas that influenced his beliefs in what it meant to be a man.


“As a man, I was taught that I was more valuable than my wife and kids," he said. "That’s deep — and I didn’t even realize it until I dissected it.”

Photo by Gage Skidmore/Flickr.

He knew he needed help and was strong enough to ask for it.

Crews said he sought professional treatment for an addiction to pornography and went through therapy to begin a path of self-reflection. Over time, the former NFL star and his wife Rebecca King-Crews reunited and they remain together.

“My wife has always brought the wisdom,” he said. “I truly believe you don’t see your own faults. There were so many times I just knew I was right and my wife was like, ‘Uhh uhh.’”

When it comes to unraveling his own past distorted views of masculinity, Crews wasn't shy about what he now thinks. "It’s a cult no different than Jim Jones or David Koresh,” he said.

In a separate interview, Crews offered some simple but poignant advice for men as they trudge through their own attempts to grapple cultural pressures and norms. “Don’t speak for women," he said. "Hold other men accountable.”

The response from other men has been mostly positive but there's also been a noticeable silence from other actors.

In March 2018, Crews shared an encouraging letter he received from Old Spice, in which employees at the company offered their support in response to Crews speaking out about his own #MeToo experience.

However, he also noted the deafening silence from his male co-stars in "The Expendables" film series, alleging that one of the film's producers even tried pressuring him into being silent over the issue of sexual assault.

There's nothing wrong with being masculine. But real strength comes from vulnerability and personal growth.

Men like Crews and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson show us that the concept of masculinity is more complex than most people think.

As a former athlete and physically imposing action star, there's nothing passive about Terry Crews. This is a man who has literally made people laugh by repeatedly screaming at the camera in his hilarious Old Spice commercials.

But much like when The Rock recently opened up about his own struggles with depression, these decidedly masculine men are showing the world, especially other guys, that there's a difference between being strong and being toxic.

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No one should feel they have the right to tell a woman when, where, and how she can breastfeed. The stigma should be placed on those who have the nerve to tell a woman feeding her child to "Cover up" or to ask "Where's your modesty?"

Breasts were made to feed babies. Yes, they also have a sexual function but anyone who has the maturity of a sixth grader knows the difference between a sexual act and feeding a child.

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The Me Too movement has shed light on just how many actresses have been placed in positions that make them feel uncomfortable. Abuse of power has been all too commonplace. Some actresses have been coerced into doing something that made them uncomfortable because they felt they couldn't say no to the director. And it's not always as flagrant as Louis C.K. masturbating in front of an up-and-coming comedian, or Harvey Weinstein forcing himself on actresses in hotel rooms.

But it's important to remember that you can always firmly put your foot down and say no. While speaking at The Hollywood Reporter's annual Actress Roundtable, Jennifer Lopez opened up about her experiences with a director who behaved inappropriately. Laura Dern, Awkwafina, Scarlett Johansson, Lupita Nyong'o, and Renee Zellweger were also at the roundtable.

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Courtesy of Macy's

In many ways, 18-year-old Idaho native, Hank Cazier, is like any other teenager you've met. He loves chocolate, pop music, and playing games with his family. He has lofty dreams of modeling for a major clothing company one day. But one thing that sets him apart may also jeopardize his future is his recent battle against a brain tumor.

Cazier was diagnosed in 2015. When he had surgery to remove the tumor, he received trauma to his brain and lost some of his motor functionality. He's been in physical, occupational, and speech therapy ever since. The experience impacted Cazier's confidence and self-esteem, so he's been looking for a way to build himself back up again.

"I wanted to do something that helped me look forward to the future," he says.

Enter Make-A-Wish, a nonprofit organization that grants wishes for children battling critical illnesses, providing them a chance to make the impossible possible. The organization partnered with Macy's to raise awareness and help make those wishes a reality. The hope is that the "wish effect" will improve their quality of life and empower them with the strength they need to overcome these illnesses and look towards the future. That was a particularly big deal for Cazier, who had been feeling like so many of his wishes weren't going to be possible because of his critical illness.

"In the beginning, it was hard to accept that it would be improbable for me to accomplish my previous goals because my illness took away so many of my physical abilities," says Cazier. His wish of becoming a model also seemed out of reach.

But Macy's and Make-A-Wish didn't see it like that. Once they learned about Cazier's wish, they knew he had to make it come true by inviting him to be part of the magical Macy's holiday shoot in New York.

Courtesy of Macy's

Make-A-Wish can't fulfill children's wishes without the generosity of donors and partners like Macy's. In fact, since 2003, Macy's has given more than $122 million to Make-A-Wish and impacted the lives of more than 2.9 million people.

Cazier's wish experience was beyond what he could've imagined, and it filled him with so much joy and confidence. "It is like waking up and discovering that you have super powers. It feels amazing!" he exclaims.

One of the best parts about the day for him was the kindness everyone who helped make it happen showed him.

"The employees of Macy's and Make-A-Wish made me feel welcome, warm, and cared for," he says. "I am truly grateful that even though they were busy doing their jobs, they were able to show kindness and compassion towards me in all of the little details."

He also got to spend part of the shoot outdoors, which, as someone who loves climbing, hiking, and scuba-diving but has trouble doing those activities now, was very welcome.

Courtesy of Macy's

Overall, Cazier feels he grew a lot during his modeling wish and is now emboldened to work towards a better quality of life. "I want to acquire skills that help me continue to improve in these circumstances," he says.

You can change the lives of more kids like Cazier just by writing a letter to Santa and dropping it in the big red letterbox at Macy's (you can also write and submit one online). For every letter received before Dec. 24, 2019, Macy's will donate $1 to Make-A-Wish, up to $1 million. By writing a letter to Santa, you can help a child replace fear with confidence, sadness with joy, and anxiety with hope.

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