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The tear-jerking open letter Joe Biden wrote to the Stanford rape survivor

"I do not know your name — but your words are forever seared on my soul."

The tear-jerking open letter Joe Biden wrote to the Stanford rape survivor

Joe Biden at the podium.

This article originally appeared on 06.09.16


Vice President Joe Biden penned a heartfelt letter to the victim of the Stanford rape case — a story that has left the country stunned, outraged, and heartbroken.

The case's convicted perpetrator, Brock Turner, was given just six months behind bars, despite sentencing guidelines that could have resulted in him facing up to 14 years.

Why? Jail could have a "severe impact" on the 20-year-old criminal, Santa Clara County Judge Aaron Persky had determined.

The injustice doesn't stop there. It appears Turner — a former swimmer at Stanford University, whose athleticism somehow seemed disturbingly pertinent throughout the trial — will likely only spend half that time behind bars for good behavior, The Chicago Tribune reports: just three months.


Along with the rest of the country, Biden is both outraged over the injustice and saddened for the survivor.

Biden — who led the charge in passing the Violence Against Women Act in 1994 and has since been an outspoken advocate on the issue — wrote an emotionally-charged open letter, published on BuzzFeed, which both praises the 23-year-old survivor for coming forward and slams "a culture that continues to ask the wrong questions" for failing her so badly.

Here is Biden's "open letter to a courageous young woman" in full (emphasis mine):

I do not know your name — but your words are forever seared on my soul. Words that should be required reading for men and women of all ages.

Words that I wish with all of my heart you never had to write.

I am in awe of your courage for speaking out — for so clearly naming the wrongs that were done to you and so passionately asserting your equal claim to human dignity.

And I am filled with furious anger — both that this happened to you and that our culture is still so broken that you were ever put in the position of defending your own worth.

It must have been wrenching — to relive what he did to you all over again. But you did it anyway, in the hope that your strength might prevent this crime from happening to someone else. Your bravery is breathtaking.

You are a warrior — with a solid steel spine.

I do not know your name — but I know that a lot of people failed you that terrible January night and in the months that followed.

Anyone at that party who saw that you were incapacitated yet looked the other way and did not offer assistance. Anyone who dismissed what happened to you as “just another crazy night." Anyone who asked “what did you expect would happen when you drank that much?" or thought you must have brought it on yourself.

You were failed by a culture on our college campuses where one in five women is sexually assaulted — year after year after year. A culture that promotes passivity. That encourages young men and women on campuses to simply turn a blind eye.

The statistics on college sexual assault haven't gone down in the past two decades. It's obscene, and it's a failure that lies at all our feet.

And you were failed by anyone who dared to question this one clear and simple truth: Sex without consent is rape. Period. It is a crime.

I do not know your name — but thanks to you, I know that heroes ride bicycles.

Those two men who saw what was happening to you — who took it upon themselves to step in — they did what they instinctually knew to be right.

They did not say, “It's none of my business."

They did not worry about the social or safety implications of intervening, or about what their peers might think.

Those two men epitomize what it means to be a responsible bystander.

To do otherwise — to see an assault about to take place and do nothing to intervene — makes you part of the problem.

Like I tell college students all over this country — it's on us. All of us.

We all have a responsibility to stop the scourge of violence against women once and for all.

I do not know your name — but I see your unconquerable spirit.

I see the limitless potential of an incredibly talented young woman — full of possibility. I see the shoulders on which our dreams for the future rest.

I see you.

You will never be defined by what the defendant's father callously termed “20 minutes of action."

His son will be.

I join your global chorus of supporters because we can never say enough to survivors: I believe you. It is not your fault.

What you endured is never, never, never, NEVER a woman's fault.

And while the justice system has spoken in your particular case, the nation is not satisfied.

And that is why we will continue to speak out.

We will speak to change the culture on our college campuses — a culture that continues to ask the wrong questions: What were you wearing?

Why were you there? What did you say? How much did you drink?

Instead of asking: Why did he think he had license to rape?

We will speak out against those who seek to engage in plausible deniability. Those who know that this is happening, but don't want to get involved. Who believe that this ugly crime is “complicated."

We will speak of you — you who remain anonymous not only to protect your identity, but because you so eloquently represent “every woman."

We will make lighthouses of ourselves, as you did — and shine.

Your story has already changed lives.

You have helped change the culture.

You have shaken untold thousands out of the torpor and indifference toward sexual violence that allows this problem to continue.

Your words will help people you have never met and never will.

You have given them the strength they need to fight.

And so, I believe, you will save lives.

I do not know your name — but I will never forget you.

The millions who have been touched by your story will never forget you.

And if everyone who shared your letter on social media, or who had a private conversation in their own homes with their daughters and sons, draws upon the passion, the outrage, and the commitment they feel right now the next time there is a choice between intervening and walking away — then I believe you will have helped to change the world for the better.

Biden's words — as well as the survivor's letter she read aloud to her attacker — are rippling across the internet for one very important reason: Millions of us are disgusted, fed up, and demanding change to a culture that's allowed this atrocity to happen.

To every warrior with a spine of solid steel: We hear you, we support you, and we stand by your side.

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5 ways people are going all in this week

From the silliest to the most sentimental, there are so many ways people are going “all in” on the internet this week. Here are our five favorites.

5 ways people are going all in this week
5 ways people are going all in this week
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What does it mean to go “all in” on something? We’ll tell you: Whether it’s an elaborately-themed birthday party for your dog (like this one) or a guy learning Mandarin to propose to his girlfriend, going “all in” means total commitment. There’s no holding back, no second guessing—just full-throttle enthusiasm, with some flair and creativity thrown in. When people go “all in,” something truly special happens as a result.

In this roundup, we’ve scoured the internet for the best examples of people going “all in”—moments where passion, creativity, and commitment take center stage. Some are silly, some are sentimental, but all of them are a reminder that giving 100% is the only way to truly leave a mark on this world. Buckle up: These folks didn’t just show up, they went all in.

This guy's passion for lip syncing 

@pokemonmasterzo every time I see an edit to this mix it’s almost guaranteed tears #beyonce #tyrant #allnight #fyp ♬ original sound - dannyvarr

We all lip-sync from time to time. Sometimes we even get a little bit into it. And then there’s this guy: TikTok creator Pokemonmasterzo, who goes viral every other week re-enacting passionate lip-syncs of trending songs. No matter what song people are listening to this week—a Beyonce mash-up, an old Radiohead hit, or a celebratory rendition of “Love Story” in honor of Taylor Swift’s recent engagement—this guy goes completely all in with hand gestures, dance moves, and quite often even a shot of his face superimposed on the screen (also singing!). His picture is basically next to the definition of “enthusiastic” in the dictionary. We can't get enough.

This trading experiment, brought to you by All In

Remember that story about a guy who traded a paperclip for a house? In a nutshell, Canadian blogger Kyle MacDonald started a year-long project back in 2025 to take one red paperclip and keep exchanging it for things of increasing value until he ended up with a house. With the paperclip, MacDonald traded for a pen. With the pen, he traded up for a hand-sculpted doorknob. With the doorknob, he traded up for a Coleman camp stove (with fuel included). On and on it went until 2006, when he finally traded a role in a movie for a two-story farmhouse in Kipling, Saskatchewan. It’s basically a testament to what you can accomplish if you just have dedication, creativity, and vision (aka, you go absolutely all in).

This week, our friends at All In are starting their own version of the paperclip trend, starting with an All In bar and trading up to see what they get. (Though we have to say the phrase “trading up” is debatable, because these bars are delicious.) Check it out and see where they end up!

Another thing you should check out: This incredible deal where you can get a free(!!!) box of All In organic snack bars. Just sign up with your phone number on Aisle, grab two free boxes of All In bars at Sprouts, snap a pic of your receipt and text it through Aisle. They’ll Venmo or PayPal you back for the cost of one box, and that’s it! Enjoy.

This "chicken jockey" ice skating routine 

@k.and.miss.congeniality 🐓⛸️🌟Chicken Jockey from Minnesota 🌟⛸️🐓 @U.S. Figure Skating #nationalshowcase ♬ Holding Out for a Hero - yourmusic4ever💯

If you have children over the age of, say, preschool, you’ve likely heard the words “chicken jockey,” a term from Minecraft, a popular video game in which players can build, create, and interact with others in a 3D world made up of blocks.

A little background: A “chicken jockey” in the Minecraft universe is when, in the course of the game, a baby zombie will randomly spawn onscreen, riding a chicken and attacking the players. (I don’t get it either, I just had to have a child explain this to me just now.)

Anyway, in the Minecraft movie, which premiered earlier this year, there’s a scene where a chicken jockey drops into the arena and Jack Black’s character shouts “Chicken Jockey!” The moment quickly became a fan favorite and turned into something of a movement, where moviegoers would scream “Chicken jockey!” and erupt in chaos, throwing popcorn and just generally going wild (you could even say they were going all in).

Fast-forward to today, and chicken jockey is still a popular term among kids—so much so that this young performer created an ice-skating routine to honor the chicken jockey moment, complete with a full-body costume. That’s right—she ice skated in an inflatable chicken jockey costume. Talk about dedication. The creativity, the enthusiasm, and the cultural relevance truly make this a performance to behold.

This woman's transformation—an entire year in the making

@tiszfit.cpt And I always made sure I was on incline 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨 Was it hard in the beginning? Hell yeah sometimes I would only sprint for 10 secs at a time But I knew if I kept doing it I would get faster , stronger & build my endurance And quess what I did ! Keep going sis !! It’s possible with consistency! #gymtok #motivation #fypシ ♬ Otis nola bounce part 2 - VIP

There’s something beautiful about a person who shows up for herself, day in and day out. In this viral TikTok, creator @tiszfit.cpt recorded herself running on a treadmill in her garage every day, ultimately reaching a goal of eighty (!!!!) pounds lost. Going all in to achieve your goals is one thing to celebrate for sure, but it’s just as meaningful to watch her confidence gradually grow throughout the video. As she continues to run, her garage door opens little by little, until she’s working out unashamedly in open view of her neighborhood. You can’t help but be incredibly proud.

The most tear-jerking college send-off you've ever seen

Finally, here’s one of the most thoughtful (and meaningful) college send-offs we’ve ever seen. In this video, Ben (@its_benzram) walks into the hallway of his parent’s house and finds all of his childhood toys lined up along the walls leading to the staircase. The reason? They’ve all come to “say goodbye” and wish him well as he goes to college. Not only are all his stuffed animals there, his family made handmade signs (“We Love You”) and created a collage of pictures of Ben throughout the years alongside his childhood toys. Parents: Get a box of tissues before you watch this. Not kidding.

Snag your free (!!) snack bars here while this deal lasts.

via Royalty Now / Instagram
Artist's gallery shows us what historical figures would look like if they were alive today

One of the major reasons we feel disassociated from history is that it can be hard to relate to people who lived hundreds, let alone thousands, of years ago. Artist Becca Saladin, 29, is bridging that gap by creating modern-looking pictures of historical figures that show us what they'd look like today.

"History isn't just a series of stories, it was real people with real feelings. I think the work brings people a step closer to that," she said according to Buzzfeed.

Saladin has always loved archaeology and always wished to see see what historical events actually looked like. She uses her digital art skills to do exactly that.

She started her Instagram page after wanting to see her favorite historical figure, Anne Boleyn, in real life instead of artist's depiction.

history, historical figures, art, artists, paintings, portraits, abraham lincoln, shakespeare, anne boleyn, marie antoinette A contemporary painting of Anne BoleynBy English school - Public Domain,

"I wanted to know if she could come to life from the few pale, flat portraits we have of her," she wrote for Bored Panda. "I started the account to satisfy my own curiosity about what members of the past would look like if they were standing right in front of me."

This is no AI gimmick. Saladin, in addition to being a great artist, is also a student of history. She consults existing portraiture, reads letters, studies the period, and examines both life and death masks (wax or plaster facial molds) of her subjects. She understands period art, as well. In her recreation of Marie Antoinette, Saladin writes, "It’s pretty obvious how stylized 18th century French portraits are; the huge eyes, tiny noses, and pinched lips." Her image of Antoinette, then, needed some "facial correction." I'd like to see AI do that.

Her artwork has earned her over 375,000 followers on Instagram. "I always struggled with finding a true hobby, so this has been such a fun creative outlet for me," she said. "It's really cool to have found a hobby that combines my passions for both art and history."

Saladin does brilliant job at giving historical figures modern clothing, hairstyles and makeup. She also shows them in places you'd find modern celebrities or politicians. Her modern version of Marie Antoinette appears to be posing for paparazzi while her Mona Lisa is photographed on a busy city street.

Here's a sampling of some of Saladin's modern representations of historical figures.

King Tut

Genghis Khan



King Henry VII



Louis XV



Agrippina the Younger

Queen Nefertiti

Ben Franklin

Julius Caesar


William Shakespeare


Marie Antoinette


Saladin's work has connected deeply with hundreds of thousands of online fans and followers. Her images have brought history to life in a way most of us have rarely experienced. There's something about seeing Abraham Lincoln in a dapper sweater with modern beard and hairstyles that makes him seem much more like a real person than any official portrait ever could.

Saladin began sharing portraits online years and years ago, but continues to this day. There's always more to discover, new ways to push her medium forward, and more history to unearth.

This article originally appeared five years ago. It has been updated.

Canva

A tall man and a shorter woman.

With every Facebook or Instagram ad, it can often feel like we're constantly being told that a beauty standard exists and none of are living up to it. "Drink THIS to get slimmer, eat THAT to gain muscles." It's exhausting and can truly do a number on self-esteem from an early age.

In Psychology Today's article "Words have Weight: the Many Forms of Body Shaming" author Alice E. Schluger, Ph.D. poses the question, "When was the last time you looked in the mirror and admired your reflection? We are bombarded with images of perfect bodies on TV, in magazines, and all over social media. In our weight-conscious culture, physical appearance often overrides health considerations."

But what if we could simply deny those societally-imposed "standards," and start writing a script where we (gasp) actually love our bodies? The thing is, we totally can.

This was recently put to the test for me in terms of height. "Fun-sized," is what they used to say in college. I'm five foot two and, frankly, I never gave it much thought. Not too long ago, however, I was meeting a friend's 27-year-old daughter for the first time. Upon seeing me, in heels, she exclaimed, "My dad didn't mention you were SO SHORT. You're too short."

I was taken aback. I was stunned. I don't think she meant it nefariously per se. But it felt so strange because I walk around all day in my body without thinking about my inches. For someone to fixate on it and scream it to me? Well, that felt odd.

reese witherspoon, shortness, short celebs, body shaming Reese Witherspoon saying "No." Giphy

Sure, there were "clap-backs" with which I could have replied. From the subreddit r/Comebacks, there are tons of choices, the most scathing of which might be, "I can see all your chins from here." The issue with hitting them where it hurts is you're perpetuating the cycle of shame and, frankly, becoming the very bully who's hurting you to begin with. The old adage "Hurt people hurt people" is so true, and if we recognize it before we do it, we can be part of the solution rather than the problem.

The key is to reframe what being short even means. For many, it's not negative in the slightest. While many memes will tell us how important it is to embrace body positivity, it's nice when it comes from external sources too. The more positive representation for every body type, the better. So what I wish I'd said is, "Yeah. Like Lady Gaga. And Reese Witherspoon and Ariana Grande and Salma Hayek and Scarlett Johansson and Quinta Brunson and Sabrina Carpenter. The list goes on." Or, in going back to the Reddit thread, there were lots of sweet ways to own my inches proudly without lashing back. My favorite—and what I wish I'd said, "So the worst thing about me is that there isn't MORE of me?"

Quinta Brunson hosts SNL and sings about being short. www.youtube.com, Saturday Night Live, NBC

Short men have also been an inspiration on this topic lately. Being short for guys has been challenging in years past. Just recently, a few online dating sites made the news for allowing height to be filtered, resulting in some shorter men getting pushed out of the algorithm. (In an Upworthy story, Evan Porter humorously suggests more sensible filters than height, such as "Can the person spell?")

Tom Cruise, short king, celebrities, mission impossible, short Tom Cruise in a scene from Mission: Impossible Giphy

However, there has been a clear turn in body positivity for shorter men. Articles like "5 Reasons Short Guys Make the Best Husbands" from Your Tango note that shorter men, on average, live longer. And, as mentioned, there's more representation in the media. Notoriously, Tom Cruise showed the world what a short king could do. Couples like Tom Holland, photographed beautifully with his much taller fiancé Zendaya, are giving men the much-deserved confidence boost some really need.

Just a couple of years ago, an opinion piece ran in The New York Times called "There Has Never Been a Better Time to be Short." Among many claims, writer Mara Altman notes, "Short people don’t just save resources, but as resources become scarcer because of overpopulation and global warming, they may be best suited for long-term survival.”

Comedian Dan Toomey (@Dhtoomey on TikTok) has some fun with the article as a short king himself:

@dhtoomey

Breaking news, short kings #news #short #nyc #dating

At the end of the day, it's not about being short or tall or thin or fat. It's about challenging beauty norms and embracing our wonderous, unique bodies that house our hearts and lungs and bones. Ya know, those organs that keep us breathing and alive. Oprah Winfrey's advice on the matter is perfection:

"Are you ready to stop colluding with a culture that makes so many of us feel physically inadequate? Say goodbye to your inner critic, and take this pledge to be kinder to yourself and others."




Leya comes up to Mats Janzon on his kayak for cuddles.

When Mats Janzon found Leya, she was just a tiny baby curled up alone in the grass near his home in Sweden. Janzon was out on a quiet walk in the woods when he heard a soft peeping sound and saw it was a baby otter. He kept his distance for several hours, hoping her mother would return. When no one came, he searched the area and found that her mother had been killed on a major road nearby. Leya appeared to be starving and barely breathing, and he knew she wouldn't make it without help.

Janzon had volunteered with animal rescues while working as a pilot in Cyprus, but after moving back to Sweden several years ago, he felt a pull to leave his job and spend more time in nature. "This shift led me to focus on helping wildlife," Janzon tells Upworthy. "I’ve cared for various animals, mostly birds, that seemed to find me. Huginn, a crow I rescued, stayed with me for three years before he was ready to join his own flock in the wild."

@matsjanzon

The story of Leya #ottersoftiktok #OtterBuddy #WildlifeTikTok #ViralNature #CuteAnimals #TikTokNature #FurryFriends #AnimalBesties #KayakAdventures #WildlifeLover #wildanimals #naturevibes #fyp #otter #RescueStories

However, Janzon had never raised an otter before and didn't know what to do. He was scared, as Leya needed care around the clock, but she began to thrive and quickly bonded with him. She would cry when he left the room and curl up in his lap to feel safe.

"The first time she let me pet her, I remember thinking this can't be real," Janzon told the TikTok account SoulPaws Tails. "It felt like a dream, this wild, free otter choosing to trust me."

Still, Janzon kept second-guessing himself, wondering if he was doing the right thing. Otters are wild animals, and he knew Leya couldn't stay indoors forever. So, starting with a plastic kiddie pool in the backyard, Janzon helped Leya learn to swim. She was awkward in the water at first, but little by little, day by day, she grew more confident.

@matsjanzon

Two years ago, our sweet otter pup Leya took her very first splash in a cozy baby pool, a moment that still melts our hearts! At just a few weeks old, tiny Leya was all curiosity and wobbly paws as she explored the shallow water filled with colorful floating toys. 🌊✨ Her first cautious pats at the surface turned into excited splashes as she chased the toys. Watching her dive and twirl, already showing off her natural otter grace, was pure magic. Now, at 2 years old, Leya’s likely out in the wild, thriving and possibly finding a safe territory for her own pups. 🌿 We’re so proud of the strong, playful otter she’s become, and we’ll always cherish those early days of her splashing adventures in that little pool. 💙 Here’s to Leya, ruling the rivers and raising her own little swimmers! 🦦🌟 #Throwback #FirstSwim #OtterMemories #WildAndFree #fyp #foryourpage

Leya followed Janzon everywhere. Soon she became part of the family, which included another rescued crow and a cat. The animals would play hide and seek, chasing one another around the bushes. Janzon says it was like something out of a children's storybook.

Once Leya was totally comfortable in the water, he took her down to the lake. She looked up at Janzon as if to ask, "What now?" He nodded at her, and she jumped into the water. He realized that in some way he'd become a father to her.

"I named Leya while sitting with her on my lap, gazing out over the lake in a near-meditative state," Janzon tells Upworthy. "I quietly asked her, 'Who are you? What should I call you?' The name Leya popped into my mind, and when I said it aloud, she instantly looked up at me. That’s when I knew it was the name meant for her."

But as Leya grew, so did her wild instincts. She began to wander farther and stay out longer, and Janzon knew it was time to let her go. He describes it as "a strange kind of love—part pride, part heartbreak" but she started living the life she was meant to live.

@soulpaws_tails

This Otter Hope Into My Kayak Every Morning Just To Say "Hello". Beautiful And Heartwarming Story of Leya The Otter #animals #animalsoftiktok #tiktok #otter #tiktok

"Leya is an old soul, brimming with energy and positivity, always finding opportunities in everything," Janzon says. "Nothing seems impossible for her. She’s been a true inspiration and a dear friend during my transition from a conventional career to a life focused on something greater, not just working to pay bills, but making a difference by helping all living beings in our community."

At some point, Leya started staying away for days at a time. But even then, when Janzon was out for a morning kayak ride on the lake, he'd see her nose pop out of the water and start moving towards him. Leya knew he was there and would swim up and climb into the kayak for cuddles and a ride.

@matsjanzon

#fyp #foryourpage #otter #morningmotivation #relaxing #RescueStories #ViralNature #wildanimals #morningvibes #sunrise #WildlifeTikTok

Sometimes she'd even bring a snack with her:

@matsjanzon

#fyp #foryourpage #otter #morningmotivation #relaxing #RescueStories #ViralNature #morningvibes #wildanimals

And sometimes she'd return after nearly a week away for a little snuggle time:

@matsjanzon

Someone came home tired after 6days in the wild 🦦❤️‍🩹 #foryourpage #fyp #morningmotivation #RescueStories #otter

People love seeing Leya's bond with her human and Janzon's peaceful videos that seem like something out of a dream:

"Sorry, which fantasy world is this and can I have the Google maps link to get there?"

"I wish the world could be like this."

"She’s your significant otter. 😂😂"

"You are so lucky to be friends with a cute otter who also gets to live her own life. She chooses to be with you. 🥰"

"She’s just living her best life and I think you are too - good luck to you and enjoy it. 😊"

otter, leya the otter, otter rescue, mats janzon, tame otter Leya and Mats hanging out in his kayak.Courtesy of Mats Janzon

Mats says Leya is officially living her wild life now.

"I last saw Leya at the end of May," Janzon tells Upworthy. "Initially, we thought she’d find her own territory before winter, but after several long trips, she chose to stay under the house while the lake was frozen. When spring arrived, she resumed her search, staying away for up to 10 days before returning for brief visits, lasting a few hours to a day. Her last visit was unusually long, over a week. I suspect she may have been pregnant, eating heartily to prepare for a longer stay in a new territory farther away."

Janzon wants people to know that as much as he loves Leya, she's not a pet. "When an animal trusts you, it creates a bond deeper than words can explain," he told SoulPaws Tails. "If you're thinking of adopting or rescuing an animal, especially a wild one, please do it with your whole heart and full responsibility. Do your homework, talk to professionals, ask questions, learn everything you can about animals like Leya. They aren't pets. They're living, feeling souls that deserve to be loved and respected for who they are."

You can follow Mats Janzon and see more videos of Leya on TikTok.

Image via Canva

Millennial parents share how parenting has changed compared to Boomer parents.

Raising kids has changed with every generation. For Millennials raising kids, the parenting landscape has changed immensely since the experiences of their Boomer parents.

In an online parenting community, member @Eclectic7112 posed the question to fellow Millennials: "Millennials with kids, what's something you have to deal with, that your parents didn't have to deal with at the same level or at all?"

They followed it up with more details. "A lot has changed in the last 40 years. This includes raising kids. If there was something that you had to explain to your parents that's 'different' than it was when they raised us, what would it be?

parents, parenting, dad, babies, gif Come Here Season 6 GIF by This Is Us Giphy

As the first response, @Eclectic7112 shared, "I'll go first ---> the cost of childcare." And their peers did not hold back on their responses. Millennial parents opened up about 15 major changes they've faced as parents compared to the previous generation, from technology to sports to momfluencers.

1. "The expectation that work never ends and you should be reachable after work hours and weekends." - Beberuth1131

2. "My kids expect me to play with them ALL the time. I’m pretty sure I wasn’t allowed to talk to my dad while he was watching TV." - Dadbod646

kids, playing, parenting, playing with kids, playtime Work From Home Kids GIF by MOODMAN Giphy

3. "Having grandparents who don't help. My grandma helped, and I spent months with my grandparents during the year." -SandiegoJack

4. "Prices of stuff in general. My mom managed to raise three kids on one income at a gas station and we always had everything we needed. Did she struggle? Of course, but it was still do-able. It is beyond impossible now, even at my $20/hour paycheck." - Old-Capital5079

5. "Momfluencers." - Puzzleheaded-Sphinx

6. "Sports are so different now. I'm 43. My kid is 9 and plays hockey. Youth sports have gotten nuts. When I was a kid, you played hockey in the winter. You played for your town's team. You had a practice each week and a game each week. Now there are spring leagues, and summer leagues. There are 'competitive' triple A programs that cost tens of thousands of dollars a year. Practices are 2+ times a week or more. I've talked to other parents who are already talking about college scholarships or going pro... it's nuts. Like you don't HAVE to sign up for all of it but once you put your kid in a sport there is SO MUCH pressure to do more. I used hockey as an example but I have friends with kids who've had the same experiences in baseball, cheerleading, gymnastics, swimming, soccer..." - seanofkelley

cheerleading, cheerleader, kids cheer, cheer squad, cheerleading sport bring it GIF by Lifetime Giphy

7. "Play dates... apparently nobody can be trusted enough to watch your kid until they're like 8 or 9." - JP96

8. "The fact that technology is so integrated with school. I can’t keep my kids off screens because that’s how they do 90% of their schoolwork. Their schools start providing Chromebooks in kindergarten. Half of their assignments require watching Youtube videos. They have to fill out google forms for school events. And my kids’ band director pushes out music and drill on google drive. I constantly have to find new ways to try to give them access to what they need but still limit the constant unfettered access to the internet." - UnhappyDimension681

9. "How we sit in cars. We kind of just laid in the back on road trips. Now they're in boosters until their big. I understand safety obviously but big difference in Long road trips!" - Jessssiiiiccccaaaa

minivan, road trip, travel with kids, traveling, car Happy Honda GIF Giphy

10. "Social media and keeping-up-with-the-Jones. Almost every 8-year old in my daughter's class has a cell phone OR an Apple Watch. It's hard for my wife and I to explain to our daughter why we don't think it is a good idea for her yet. There was even some TikTok drama at her school that got the district's attention where some 5th graders were randomly matching up 5th graders as if they were dating." - dr_z0idberg_md

11. "Monitoring their consumption of media is far and away the hardest thing. I haven't caught them watching anything TOO out of bounds, but the other day we were talking about someone who'd only go on a trip if someone else was paying for it, and my 10 y/o daughter asked 'You mean like a sugar baby?' and I just...how? Where? She likes watching Youtube shorts and tutorials and those "oddly satisfying" videos, and sometimes looks up musicians she likes, but I can't screen everything she can get her hands on. I looked at her history and nothing pops out, and maybe it was someone from school, but I just don't know." - andmewithoutmytowel

12. "Summer camp. My ass was out from morning to 7 at night." - awiththejays

summer camp, camp, sleep away camp, overnight camp, kids camp summer camp GIF Giphy

13. "School drop off and pick up. I walked to school and home from school as an elementary school kid. Now, if your elementary school kid tries to walk to the school door without a parent, they’d be on the phone with CPS before your kid’s butt crossed the threshold. Walking to/from school is still a common practice in other countries but sadly not here anymore." - TrickyOperation6115

14. "Every birthday party needs a theme now." - Janeheroine

15. "The fact that we can never watch tv because the kids can watch exactly what they want on demand at anytime, not having to wait for the cartoons to come on." - Woefulraddish


Internet

These women in Miami are scratching backs for money and business is booming

Got an itch you just can't scratch? These ladies have got your back–literally.

These women in Miami are scratching backs for money and business is booming

Sometimes you find yourself with an uncomfortable itch right in the middle of your back that you can't seem to reach without assistance. Or you just want someone to slowly and gently rake their nails across your back due to the soothing nature of it all. Either way, there's a salon in Miami where the ladies make a living scratching people's backs. It's not small change either.

The back scratching sessions cost $75 to $129, depending on whether you opt for a 30-minute or 60-minute session, and they don't stop at your back. Get your mind out of the gutter. The only funny business going on is if they accidentally hit a ticklish spot. People find the sound, feeling, and entire experience of back scratching therapeutic, so Toni George and her daughter, Brittany Pashun George, created Scratcher Girls. A business offering full-body scratching.

back scratching; touch starvation; touch depravation; the scratcher girls; back scratch business Relief at last: back scratcher and hands team up!Photo credit: Canva

So what's the deal with paying money to have your back scratched? Well, the reality is that humans are touch-starved, also known as touch-deprived. Jordan Madison, LCMFT and founder of Therapy is My J.A.M. explains, "Touch deprivation is also referred to as touch starvation or skin hunger. It occurs when you’re not receiving physical touch from other living beings. It doesn’t have to just be sensual or romantic touch either. Receiving touch from family members and friends is just as important. Some symptoms of touch deprivation include feelings of depression, anxiety, stress, difficulty sleeping, and low relationship satisfaction."

In recent years, there has been a trend of entrepreneurs raking in big bucks to address this touch deficit humans are experiencing. With the influx of remote jobs, more people living further away from family members, and increased usage of social media to feel connected, a need arose for physical touch. Due to this unique demand, professional cuddlers, hand holders and back scratchers have gone from being a decent side hustle to a full-blown business.

@scratcher_girls #creatorsearchinsights Reconnecting with your inner child, one gentle trace at a time. Let the soothing art of body tracing and scratch therapy bring a little healing nostalgia and comfort into your world. 🤗 • • #inner #innerchildhealing #fyp #calm ♬ original sound - Scratcher Girls ASMR

Scratcher Girls didn't just start; they've been in business since 2010 and according to Axios Miami, all the staff members are women. The ladies keep their nails well-manicured and have their sharp nails professionally cleaned and filled between sessions. Scratching has several positive benefits outside of the relaxing sensation some may get from the activity. A 2015 study by Frontiers in Psychology explains that some use light scratching of the skin as a self-soothing mechanism, as it releases oxytocin and dopamine, which can help decrease anxiety and stress.

A viral video put them on the radar of even more clients after a YouTuber flew to Miami specifically to experience the services they offer. That's when Toni George, the founder of Scratcher Girls, explains how she came up with the idea, saying, "the scratch therapy concept was actually birthed from my experience as a child. I absolutely love the human touch, first off. And I absolutely love to have my back or my head caressed, scratched, whatever. What if we turn this into a business? Would anyone else pay to have this done?"

The answer to her then hypothetical question has been a resounding, "yes." Not only would someone pay to have this done, but apparently, people would fly hundreds of miles to have someone drag their nails across their backs. The family owned business posts videos to their social media pages with the consent of their customers, targeting the ASMR community, which drives a lot of their business. People can't seem to get enough of the Scratcher Girls, and viewers who haven't yet had the pleasure of experiencing the scratching for themselves are ready to empty their bank accounts.

Under a video of a scratch session, one woman says, "I would stay there till every card I have declines."

Another says, "Take every piece of my money. And I would need a driver to get home."

"My best friend and I have talked about this for so many years on how we would pay for somebody to do this but we never knew what you would call it and how to find somebody that does it. My mom used to do that when I was a child to put me to sleep every night," someone else admits.

Comments under their ASMR videos pour in from all over the world with people asking where they can find a service like that near them. Unfortunately for those people, Scratcher Girls is the only business that offers "scratch therapy" in the entire world, so if you're wanting to experience the pleasure of being lightly scratched, you'll have to book a flight to Miami.