+
More

Some advice for the people who kicked 11 black women off a train for laughing

Here are five tips.

The Napa Valley Wine Train is catching heat for kicking a group of middle-aged black women off their trip for, allegedly, laughing too loud.

Photo by Lisa Renee Johnson/Facebook.


The women were greeted by police officers, who escorted them onto a bus, which took them back to their cars.

Even though the train company claims the women were being "severely disruptive," the women have countered via Facebook that their removal was racially motivated, and they started the hashtag #LaughingWhileBlack.

Look: Loud laughter can certainly be irritating. Especially if you're not in on the joke. There's no denying that.

That said, by calling the cops and throwing the women off the train, it seems likely that the train staff and other guests may have ... overreacted. Just a teensy bit.

And, perhaps, could use some practical advice for the future.

With that in mind, here are five things you can do if you are annoyed by a group of middle-aged black women laughing really loud on a wine train.

1. Suck it up.

These smiling women aren't hurting you! Photo by Lisa Renee Johnson/Facebook.

There are many venues where being quiet is the appropriate and respectful thing to do, such as a cemetery, or a hospital, or the office of the governor. But you're not any of those places. You're on a wine train. People are there to drink wine and have fun. So suck it up.

2. Realize that everyone enjoys themselves differently.

Two of the women, expressing joy, like human beings do. Photo by Lisa Renee Johnson/Facebook.

As a deleted scene from the movie "Sideways" probably insists, there is no one right way to enjoy a three-hour scenic wine train tour. Some people like to stare silently out the window and pretend they're at church. Some people like to laugh and talk and drink. Both are perfectly acceptable activities!

Studies have shown that black girls and women are frequently stereotyped as obnoxious and loud — which itself is just one of a host of bizarre subconscious biases that people have been found to have. Others include: Black people feel less pain than white people and black boys are "older and less innocent" than their white peers.

Unconscious bias runs deep. It's important to take a step back and wonder if a group of people who seem "obnoxious and loud" to you at first might actually just be "people reasonably enjoying themselves."

3. Complain later to your friends and family in private.

Instead of marching the women through the train into their own separate car. Photo by Lisa Renee Johnson/Facebook.

This is key. When you get home, go straight to your husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend/BFF/dog and complain about the really loud, annoying women on the train today. "Yes, Jeanine, you're totally right," they will say. "I'm sure those women were super irritating and you're right to be annoyed." Not only will you feel validated, but best of all, you won't be responsible for getting 11 middle-aged black women, at least one of whom survived Jim Crow, kicked off a wine train.

4. Try not to get the cops involved.


Yeah, please don't. Photo by Lisa Renee Johnson/Facebook.

In the event that the group of middle-aged black women has, in fact, become so disruptive that it is necessary to remove them from the train — perhaps they won't stop singing Journey's "Separate Ways" at the top of their lungs — is it really necessary to call the cops?

The train company charges that the women were removed for the "safety of all of our guests," but as far as I can tell, "laughing really loud" does not constitute a security threat.

Research suggests that even when they commit borderline crimes or commit crimes in the same proportion as white people, black people are more likely to receive criminal treatment. And unless we've entered a young-adult-novel dystopia sometime in the last week, laughing heartily isn't a crime. Not even a little bit.

So don't call the cops.

5. Most of all, just treat people like people.

'Cause, you know. They are. People. Photo by Lisa Renee Johnson/Facebook.

People can be annoying. That's a fact of life. But even when they're annoying, people are people. It's important to treat them that way, and not as potential problems to be dealt with.

We all have to get along in this world. Some of us do life differently than others. We're all human. Let's try to respect that.

@thehalfdeaddad/TikTok

Dad on TikTok shared how he addressed his son's bullying.

What do you do when you find out your kid bullied someone? For many parents, the first step is forcing an apology. While this response is of course warranted, is it really effective? Some might argue that there are more constructive ways of handling the situation that teach a kid not only what they did wrong, but how to make things right again.

Single dadPatrick Forseth recently shared how he made a truly teachable moment out of his son, Lincoln, getting into trouble for bullying. Rather than forcing an apology, Forseth made sure his son was actively part of a solution.


The thought process behind his decision, which he explained in a now-viral TikTok video, is both simple and somewhat racial compared to how many parents have been encouraged to handle similar situations.
Keep ReadingShow less

Meteorologist Matt Laubham prays for the people in the path of a deadly tornado.

Broadcasters who have to report on tragedies as they are happening have a tough job. On the one hand, they have to maintain their professionalism and inform the public of what's happening in a factual way. On the other hand, they're still human and sometimes humanity trumps the traditional perception of what's "professional."

Such was the case for WTVA meteorologist Matt Laubhan, who found himself live on the air staring at a radar scan of a deadly tornado as it moved towards the small town of Amory, Mississippi. He, more than anyone, understood the severity of the situation, and he did his best to convey that to his viewers.

"This is a strong, life-threatening tornado that's going to move either extremely close to Amory or in through the northern part of the city of Amory."

He added, "Y'all trust me too much," explaining that people sometimes take his predictions of where the tornado will go as hard fact, but the reality is that tornados can change directions at any time. "So Amory, we need to be in our tornado safe place," he said.

Keep ReadingShow less

A Korean mother and her son

A recently posted story on Reddit shows a mother confidently standing up for her family after being bullied by a teacher for her culture. Reddit user Flowergardens0 posted the story to the AITA forum, where people ask whether they are wrong in a specific situation.

Over 5,600 people commented on the story, and an overwhelming majority thought the mother was right. Here’s what went down:

“I (34F) have a (5M) son who attends preschool. A few hours after I picked him up from school today, I got a phone call from his teacher,” Flowergardens0 wrote. “She made absolutely no effort to sound kind when she, in an extremely rude and annoyed tone, told me to stop packing my son such ‘disgusting and inappropriate’ lunches."

Keep ReadingShow less

Rick Astley rocking his Foo Fighters 'Everlong' cover.

Rick Astley has to be the luckiest '80s musician on the planet. The whole "Rickrolling" phenomenon has given his hit song "Never Gonna Give You Up" a reach far beyond its natural life span, and kept the guy a household name far longer than he probably would have been.

(For those who are unfamiliar, Rickrolling is when you make someone think they're being sent to a website, but the link goes to Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up" video instead as a joke. It's a silly viral bait-and-switch gag that's been going since 2006.)

But what people may not realize, because his most famous song has become an internet joke, is that Rick Astley is actually a really freaking great musician. The man can saaaang and it seems he's only gotten better with age.

Keep ReadingShow less
Photo via Canva, @WhattheADHD/Twitter

The 'bionic reading' font is designed to help keep you focused and read faster.

Reading is a fundamental tool of learning for most people, which is why it's one of the first things kids learn in school and why nations set literacy goals.

But even those of us who are able to read fluently might sometimes struggle with the act of reading itself. Perhaps we don't read as quickly as we wish we could or maybe our minds wander as our eyes move across the words. Sometimes we get to the end of a paragraph and realize we didn't retain anything we just read.

People with focus or attention issues can struggle with reading, despite having no actual reading disabilities. It can be extremely frustrating to want to read something and have no issues with understanding the material, yet be unable to keep your mind engaged with the text long enough to get "into" what you're reading.

Keep ReadingShow less
@penslucero/TikTok

Pency Lucero taking in the Northern Lights

Seeing the northern lights is a common bucket list adventure for many people. After all, it ticks a lot of boxes—being a dazzling light show, rich historical experience and scientific phenomenon all rolled into one. Plus there’s the uncertainty of it all, never quite knowing if you’ll witness a vivid streak of otherworldly colors dance across the sky…or simply see an oddly colored cloud. It’s nature’s slot machine, if you will.

Traveler and content creator Pency Lucero was willing to take that gamble. After thorough research, she stumbled upon an Airbnb in Rörbäck, Sweden with an actual picture of the northern lights shining above the cabin in the listing. With that kind of photo evidence, she felt good about her odds.

However, as soon as she landed, snow began falling so hard that the entire sky was “barely visible,” she told Upworthy. Martin, the Airbnb host, was nonetheless determined to do everything he could to ensure his guests got to see the spectacle, even offering to wake Lucero up in the middle of the night if he saw anything.

Then one night, the knock came.

Keep ReadingShow less