"I’m definitely really comfortable in my skin," Kody says. But a few years ago, that wasn't the case.
When Kody was in high school, he hadn't yet come out as gay. He was young and still figuring out who he was.
"I wanted to fit in," he says. "I wanted to be just like everyone else."
All photos by L'Oreal Dermablend.
He struggled with his identity, trying to reconcile who he knew he was and who he wanted to be. It wasn’t until he accepted himself that he was able to begin moving forward.
"I came out when I was 19," Kody says. "It was terrifying. I was so afraid of what people would think." But once he took the leap, he realized that he was free. "You unlock the door, and now you can live your life and express the way you feel."
Free to start expressing himself without shame, Kody began to explore. He found his passion somewhere unexpected: in makeup.
"Once I discovered makeup and once I discovered I was good at it, I started to feel more comfortable about who I am," Kody explains. Makeup gave Kody an opportunity to show off his personality in a more visual way, as a form of art and expression.
Now as a professional makeup artist, Kody uses Dermablend on all his customers, from those with "perfect" skin to those with a skin condition.
He loves it because it improves the appearance of one’s complexion without feeling like a lot of makeup. Dermablend also boasts high-performance pigments which allow the foundation and concealer to cover any skin condition. So no matter who Kody's applying makeup to, the end result is flawless.
Kody hopes that, with his help, many more people will embrace who they are because they finally feel comfortable in their own skin.
"All you have to do is just be yourself, and if you do want to wear makeup, the choice is all up to you."
Watch Kody’s story of using makeup to find empowerment:
Dermablend Reflections: KodyGrowing up, he always felt different, but now he loves what he sees in the mirror. And he's helping to spread that feeling.
Posted by Upworthy on Friday, December 1, 2017
But makeup didn’t just help Kody find his identity. It also helped him find his purpose.
"Before, I just didn’t see where I was supposed to go in life," he says. Like any young person, Kody had a hard time figuring out what his passion was and how he could incorporate it into his career. But makeup turned out to be the answer to that question, too.
"I love how I can make a customer feel really good about how they feel," Kody says. "It really makes me want to help others." He works hard to help his clients make sure their face reflects exactly what they feel on the inside. And when he gets it right, he can tell right away. "Usually their face just brightens up. They glow up," he says.
Kody wants to spread the message that makeup isn’t something you should use to hide. It’s something you should use to reveal who you truly are.
"You’re beautiful with or without makeup," Kody insists. He emphasizes that makeup is something that anyone can do — or choose not to do. "Makeup is definitely a choice. It’s a very good way to have an outlet to express yourself."
In the end, it’s all about being true to yourself. "It doesn’t matter if you’re a boy, if you’re a girl," he says. "Whatever you want to express, whatever you want to feel, you just do it."
There's a reason why some people can perfectly copy accents, and others can't
Turns out, there's a neurodivergent link.
A woman in black long sleeve shirt stands in front of mirror.
Have you ever had that friend who goes on vacation for four days to London and comes back with a full-on Queen's English posh accent? "Oooh I left my brolly in the loo," they say, and you respond, "But you're from Colorado!" Well, there are reasons they (and many of us) do that, and usually it's on a pretty subconscious level.
It's called "accent mirroring," and it's actually quite common with people who are neurodivergent, particularly those with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). According Neurolaunch, the self-described "Free Mental Health Library," "Accent mirroring, also known as accent adaptation or phonetic convergence, is the tendency to unconsciously adopt the accent or speech patterns of those around us. This linguistic chameleon effect is not unique to individuals with ADHD, but it appears to be more pronounced and frequent in this population."
Essentially, when people have conversations, we're constantly "scanning" for information—not just the words we're absorbing, but the inflection and tone. "When we hear an accent, our brains automatically analyze and categorize the phonetic features, prosody, and intonation patterns," writes Neurolaunch. For most, this does result in copying the accent of the person with whom we're speaking. But those with ADHD might be more sensitive to auditory cues. This, "coupled with a reduced ability to filter out or inhibit the impulse to mimic…could potentially explain the increased tendency for accent mirroring."
While the article explains further research is needed, they distinctly state that, "Accent mirroring in individuals with ADHD often manifests as an unconscious mimicry of accents in social situations. This can range from subtle shifts in pronunciation to more noticeable changes in intonation and speech rhythm. For example, a person with ADHD might find themselves unconsciously adopting a Southern drawl when conversing with someone from Texas, even if they’ve never lived in the South themselves."
People are having their say online. On the subreddit r/ADHDWomen, a thread began: "Taking on accents is an ADHD thing?" The OP shares, "My whole life, I've picked up accents. I, myself, never noticed, but everyone around me would be like, 'Why are you talking like that??' It could be after I watched a show or movie with an accent or after I've traveled somewhere with a different accent than my 'normal.'
They continue, "Apparently, I pick it up fast, but it fades out slowly. Today... I'm scrolling Instagram, I watch a reel from a comedian couple (Darcy and Jeremy. IYKYK) about how Darcy (ADHD) picks up accents everywhere they go. It's called ADHD Mirroring??? And it's another way of masking."
(The OP is referring to Darcy Michaels and his husband Jeremy Baer, who are both touring comedians based in Canada.)
Hundreds of people on the Reddit thread alone seem to relate. One comments, "Omfg I've done this my whole life; I'll even pick up on the pauses/spaces when I'm talking to someone who is ESL—but English is my first language lol."
Sometimes, it can be a real issue for those around the chameleon. "I accidentally mimicked a waitress's weird laugh one time. As soon as she was out of earshot, my family started to reprimand me, but I was already like 'oh my god I don’t know why I did that, I feel so bad.'"
Many commenters on TikTok were shocked to find out this can be a sign of ADHD. One jokes, "Omg, yes, at a store the cashier was talking to me and she was French. She's like 'Oh are you French too? No, I'm not lol. I'm very east coast Canada."
And some people just embrace it and make it work for them. "I mirror their words or phrase! I’m 30. I realized I start calling everyone sweetie cause my manager does & I work at coffee shop."