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A straight guy gets what it's like to be gay.
It's clear that empathy is becoming the norm. Thank goodness.
10.21.13
Photo courtesy of Kerry Hyde
Do cat buttholes touch every surface they sit on? Science answers.
Cat owners sometimes have unique questions that even Google doesn't always have the answer to. This is probably the sole reason cat forums exist, but one kid who needed a 6th grade science project decided to skip the cat forums for answers and instead use the scientific method. Kaeden Henry, a sixth grader living in Florida, bravely pondered a question few (if any one) has been brave enough to ask: do cat buttholes touch every surface they sit on?
Since cats do whatever the heck they want, training them not to jump on kitchen counters is a feat even Hercules struggles to complete. These fierce felines don't care if you're cooking dinner or trying to get comfy in bed. If they want to sit somewhere, they're going to do it. The thought of cat butts on that expensive Serta pillow designed to feel like you're sleeping on a cloud can gross people out, but thanks to Kaeden, you no longer have to wonder if the butthole itself is also making contact.
Courtesy of Kerry Hyde
The curious sixth grader is homeschooled and well-versed in the scientific method thanks to her mother's PhD in animal behavior with a concentration in feline behavior. And, since they own cats, the science experiment was pretty straightforward (and directly impactful).
To complete the experiment, Henry and his mom, Kerry Hyde, bought non-toxic lipstick and applied it to each of their cat's anuses. Then, the cats were given commands.
Courtesy of Kerry Hyde
"Non-toxic lipstick was applied to their bum-bums, they were then given a series of commands (sit, wait, lie down, and jump up. Side note: Both cats have been trained since kittenhood with a variety of commands, they also know how to high-five, spin around, and speak.), they were compensated with lots of praise, pets, and their favorite treats, and the lipstick was removed with a baby wipe once we collected our data in just under 10 minutes," Hyde wrote in a Facebook post.
The results? Turns out that, no, cat buttholes do not touch every surface cats sit on. Now, let's all take a collective sigh of relief while we go over the details. Kaeden's experiment covered long-haired, short-haired, and medium-haired cats (if your cat is hairless, you better stock up on Clorox wipes just in case).
"His results and general findings: Long and medium haired cat’s buttholes made NO contact with soft or hard surfaces at all. Short haired cats made NO contact on hard surfaces. But we did see evidence of a slight smear on the soft bedding surface. Conclusion, if you have a short haired cat and they may be lying on a pile of laundry, an unmade bed, or other soft uneven surface, then their butthole MAY touch those surfaces!" Hyde shares.
Now every curious cat owner can rest easy knowing that as long as their cat has hair, their bare bottom balloon knot is not touching the majority of surfaces in their home.
Courtesy of Kerry Hyde
The amusing experiment caught the Internet's attention. People laughed and commented, with one person writing, "This is probably the most useful information I’ve learned from a science fair project."
"Good to know!...I can now eat my sandwich left on the counter with confidence!" another writes.
Courtesy of Kerry Hyde
"A+++!!! Whew!! I am very grateful for your sciencing on this subject. My fears from walking in on my cat sitting on my laptop keyboard and subsequently being grossed out and cleaning furiously in a hyper-ocd manner have been somewhat allayed and now maybe I won’t have to use QUIIITE so many wipes." someone chimes in.
"Finally.. Someone answers the important questions!!"
Murphy meets a rescued eaglet—his new foster baby.
On March 8, 2023, a keeper at World Bird Sanctuary in St. Louis County, Missouri, noticed something odd. A male bald eagle named Murphy was guarding what appeared to be a large depression in the ground. “The spot was sparsely but carefully decorated with leaves and branches, and featured a simple rock right in the center,” the nature preserve shared on its Facebook page.
Murphy began sitting on the rock, nudging it and becoming fiercely protective of it, as it if were an egg. People visiting the sanctuary would inquire about the bald eagle just sitting there, wondering if he was okay. The keepers finally put up a sign that read:
“If you see an eagle lying down in the back left corner under a perch, that’s Murphy! Murphy is not hurt, sick, or otherwise in distress. He has built a nest on the ground, and is very carefully incubating a rock! We wish him the best of luck!”
In case you’re wondering if this is unusual behavior for a 31-year-old male bald eagle, the answer is "not really, but…." Male bald eagles do share equally in nesting and baby-raising, so the paternal instinct part is normal. Murphy's channeling of that instinct onto a rock…maybe not so much. And at 31, he's more like a great-granddad than dad, as bald eagles usually live 20 to 30 years in the wild (though they do live longer in captivity).
Murphy takes fatherhood seriously, though. Soon he began screaming and charging at the four other eagles in the aviary if they came anywhere near RockBaby. (That's the official name the keepers gave Murphy’s…well, rock baby.) Naturally, the screaming and charging caused a fair amount of stress for all involved, so Murphy and RockBaby were moved to their own enclosure for everyone's protection.
People who saw this unfold started suggesting sanctuary staff replace Murphy’s rock with a real egg or get him a mate, but 1) Eagle eggs aren’t just lying around waiting to be given to wanna-be dads, 2) hatching a different kind of bird's egg would be potentially dangerous for it, and 3) Murphy had two females right there in the aviary, and none of them were interested in each other. Alas, the heart cannot be forced.
However, a different opportunity presented itself in late March when an aerie with two chicks in it was blown down by high winds. One chick didn’t survive the fall, but the other was brought to World Bird Sanctuary’s Wildlife Hospital.
A bit bruised, but otherwise healthy, the chick was given a good prognosis. Staff began feeding it while wearing a camouflage suit and holding an eagle stuffy to prevent the eaglet from imprinting on humans. What the baby really needed was a foster parent—an adult eagle who would feed and care for it.
“Murphy’s dad instincts were already in high gear,” the sanctuary wrote on April 11, “but at 31 years old, he had never raised a chick before. It’s definitely a gamble, but also the chick’s best chance.”
Introducing an eaglet to an adult eagle isn’t as simple as dropping it in the enclosure. First, the eaglet is put into what the sanctuary refers to as a “baby jail," which is a heated, comfy cage made of wood and wire that protects the eaglet but still allows some interaction between the birds so they can get used to one another. Once the desired bonding behavior is observed, then they try out some direct one-on-one interaction without the cage.
On April 12, World Bird Sanctuary announced, "IT'S HAPPENING!!!!"
The eaglet (referred to as Bald Eaglet 23-126—they don't name foster babies at the sanctuary for superstitious reasons) was released from baby jail, and after an hour or so Murphy approached it with curiosity. Was he wondering if his RockBaby had hatched? Maybe. Would he be the nurturing dad everyone hoped he would be? It appears so.
As the sanctuary shared:
"This morning, Murphy got his chance to be a full parent as 23-126 left the nest to go be closer to Murphy. The food is being dropped through a blind drop tube into the nest and baby appears unable to be able to get over the lip to get back into the nest to get the chopped food. When we checked back, we found that baby was still out of the nest and all the chopped food was still in the nest. However, Murphy’s whole fish had been removed from the nest and baby had a full crop. 23-126 is not yet old enough to tear food which means MURPHY FED THE BABY!!!!"
The comments on the update, of course, were pure gold as people became fully invested in this story and even gave the eaglet a real name—Dwayne, as in The Rock:
"I can’t believe I’m crying over eagles!"
"Murphy’s going to be giving a TedTalk: Manifest The Eaglet You Need In Your Life."
"So happy for Murphy & eaglet Dwayne (the rock Johnson)."
"'Rock, I am your Father.'"
"Omg I’m crying! Murphy never gave up on his rock and now has a baby of his very own
The wonders of nature never cease. Ty, WBS, for making this possible. These two are saving each other
."
Many people lamented that there is not a live cam at the facility so people could watch this pair as their relationship developed, but staff reminded everyone that the sanctuary is out in the middle of the woods and they don't have a strong enough signal for a live stream. But WBS staff posted regular updates on social media on how Papa Murphy and "Dwayne" were doing.
Murphy was honored on Father's Day for his stellar fostering skills as he returned to the aviary:
"We'd like to thank Murphy for his service and applaud his outstanding job in raising 23-126," the sanctuary wrote. "Murphy may have had a few moments in his parenting duties where he regretted choosing to sit on that rock, but we believe that the overall experience has been very enriching for him. We know that Murphy has enriched 126's life. Thanks to Murphy, 126 has grown up knowing that he is a Bald Eagle! 126 has learned so much from Murphy and, thanks to his efforts, will have a much greater chance of thriving in the wild after he is released. Happy Father's Day Murphy, and thank you, we couldn't have done this without you."
Sadly, Murphy passed away at age 33 in March of 2025, after having fostered two eaglets in his final years. He lived a long life for a bald eagle and the World Bird Sanctuary offered a beautiful tribute to his extraordinary bird.
"His resilience, spirit, and dedication as a foster dad touched the hearts of millions of people throughout the world, leaving an especially profound impact on those fortunate enough to have worked with him. While Murphy has delighted guests along Avian Avenue for years with his distinct vocalizations and charismatic personality, it wasn't until 2023 when he decided to incubate a rock that he gained an international following. Murphy's transition from rock incubating to rockstar foster dad of an injured eaglet brought daily joy to thousands as we watched their journey together. As Murphy's eaglet grew so did our love of him. Their journey together taught thousands about eagle growth and development, the bonds between eagle parents and their young, and the critical work that goes into wildlife rehabilitation. Murphy's eaglet continued to grow strong under his watchful gaze and went on to be released back to the wild. The following year, Murphy fostered a second eaglet in need with the same dedication he gave the first. His second eaglet is still in our care, but is making good progress toward release and we expect he will be ready by mid summer.
We could not have asked for a better ambassador and role model. We are incredibly grateful for the community that came together as a result of his heartwarming story. We are devastated by this loss and know that the community mourns with us. Murphy's foster eaglets were the first ones our hospital received in over a decade and we learned a lot about their care and space needs from observing Murphy with them. With what we learned from this, we've designed a series of special aviaries to serve the specific needs of injured and orphaned raptors, including an aviary specialized for eaglets. In honor of Murphy's legacy, we plan to name the eventual eagle fostering aviary Murphy's Manor, so that we can continue to remember him for decades to come. Murphy will be deeply missed, but his legacy will live on in the memories of those who loved him."
Rest in peace, Papa Murphy.
This article originally appeared two years ago and has since been updated.
A new way to grow strawberries with less land, less water, and more berries.
Strawberry farm harvests aren't something most of us calculate on a regular basis (or ever at all), but the numbers from a strawberry farm in Richmond, Virginia, are staggering enough to make it worth an old-school word problem. If the average American eats 8 pounds of strawberries a year, and an average strawberry farm yields approximately 20,000 pounds of berries per acre, how many people could a 200-acre strawberry field feed?
I won't make you do the math. The answer is 500,000 people. But what if a crop that size, providing enough strawberries for half a million people, could be grown on just one acre instead of 200? It's possible. You just have to go—or rather grow—up, up, up.
Indoor vertical farm company Plenty Unlimited knows a lot about growing up. In fact, it's their entire business model. Instead of the sprawling fields that traditional farming methods require, vertical farms have a much smaller land footprint, utilizing proprietary towers for growing. Plenty has used vertical farming methods to grow greens such as lettuce, kale, spinach and more for years, but now it boasts a vertical berry farm that can yield a whopping 4 million pounds of strawberries on a little less than an acre.
Growing indoors means not being at the mercy of weather or climate inpredictability (barring a storm taking out your building), which is wise in the era of climate change. Unlike a traditional greenhouse which still uses the sun for light, Plenty's indoor vertical farms make use of the latest technology and research on light, pinpointing the wavelengths plants need from the sun to thrive and recreating them with LED lights. Plenty farms also don't use soil, as what plants really need is water and nutrients, which can be provided without soil (and with a lot less water than soil requires). Being able to carefully control water and nutrients means you can more easily control the size, taste and uniformity of the berries you’re growing.
If that sounds like a lot of control, it is. And that idea might freak people out. But when a highly controlled environment means not having to use pesticides and using up to 90% less water than traditional farming, it starts to sound like a solid, sustainable farming innovation.
Plenty even uses AI in its strawberry farm, according to its website:
“Every element of the Plenty Richmond Farm–including temperature, light and humidity–is precisely controlled through proprietary software to create the perfect environment for the strawberry plants to thrive. The farm uses AI to analyze more than 10 million data points each day across its 12 grow rooms, adapting each grow room’s environment to the evolving needs of the plants – creating the perfect environment for Driscoll’s proprietary plants to thrive and optimizing the strawberries’ flavor, texture and size.”
Plenty even has its own patent-pending method of pollinating the strawberry flowers that doesn’t require bees. Even just the fact that this enormous crop of strawberries will be coming from Virginia is notable, since the vast majority of strawberries in the U.S. are grown in California.
Traditional strawberry farming takes up a lot of land.Photo credit: Canva
Plenty's Richmond farm is currently growing strawberries exclusively for Driscoll’s.
“Partnering with Plenty for the launch of the Richmond Farm allows us to bring our premium strawberries closer to consumers in the Northeast, the largest berry consumption region in the U.S.,” Driscoll’s CEO Soren Bjorn said in a press release. “By combining our 100 years of farming expertise and proprietary varieties along with Plenty’s cutting-edge technology, we can deliver the same consistent flavor and quality our customers love — now grown locally. This new innovative farm is a powerful step forward in continuing to drive category growth in new ways for our customers and consumers.”
Is Plenty’s model the farm of the future? Perhaps it’s one option, at least. The more we grapple with the impact of climate change and outdated, unsustainable farming practices, the more innovative ideas we’ll need to feed the masses. If they can get 4 million pounds of strawberries out of an acre of land, what else is possible?
This article originally appeared in February