Taking an “L” is never fun. But coming in last place can cut to the core.
But society’s definition of losing isn’t the same as failure. In fact, it’s actually a form of winning, according to legendary Scottish track coach Frank Dick.
Dick shared a wise life lesson for anyone struggling to feel successful. Through the story of coaching a 9-year-old girl, he redefines the concept of “winning,” giving it new meaning and perspective.
The little girl’s story
In a clip on YouTube, Dick explains that the persistent girl came to him for coaching. She wanted to run the 100-meter race.
“I work with her for a few weeks, and she goes to her first race,” he said. “She lines up with seven kids. ‘On you mark, get set, bang!’ She runs down the track and hurls herself at the line.”
She came in eighth place out of eight with a time of 18 seconds—dead last. Defeated, she told Dick, “I was last.” But he challenged her perspective. “No, you weren’t last,” he said, but she disagreed. He explained, “You were 18 seconds.”
She doesn’t understand what he means, so he adds: “You’ve smashed the 20-second barrier, and I had you down for 19 seconds. You’re a whole second faster than that! You know what this means? It’s your lifetime-best performance. Your own personal world record.”
Then he told her, “In some ways, you’re a first. You’re the first athlete I’ve ever coached who’s run 18 seconds in the 100 meters.”
Redefining winning can help us reach our goals
Dick adds that this conversation will help boost her confidence. It will also help her notice her personal improvements rather than compare herself to others.
“In a few weeks’ time she’s got another race. What does she think winning is now if she does 17.9 seconds? She’ll grab a flag, and she’ll run around the track because that’s what winning is,” he said.
And that’s the secret to giving the concept of winning a new definition. Appreciate every little improvement, no matter the size.
“Winning is being better today than you were yesterday, every day,” he said. “And if she keeps on working at that, in a few weeks’ time she’s fighting with other kids to get to the line.”
The point isn’t to beat the other kids she’s racing against. It’s that she showed up to race again.
“The reason you go into tough arenas in life is to be challenged to perform better. You cannot perform better if you’re not challenged,” he said. “Listen, you don’t learn to climb mountains in life by going round them or asking somebody for a ladder. You learn to climb mountains by climbing mountains. By seeking out the really toughest challenges because that makes you perform better when you keep on going, going at that.”
He ends the interview with a mic-drop quote: “One day you’ll be a one and only, but the truth is she always was, is, and will be.”
