This stranger’s amazing act of kindness has gone viral for the best reason.
Pam Brekke turned away from the register at a Lowe’s store in Orlando, tears streaming down her face. With Hurricane Irma barreling toward south Florida this weekend, Brekke desperately needed to find a generator to keep her dad’s oxygen tank working, should he lose power in the storm, according to The Telegraph. But like every…
Pam Brekke turned away from the register at a Lowe’s store in Orlando, tears streaming down her face.
With Hurricane Irma barreling toward south Florida this weekend, Brekke desperately needed to find a generator to keep her dad’s oxygen tank working, should he lose power in the storm, according to The Telegraph. But like every other store Brekke had visited this week, this particular Lowe’s had just run out of a new shipment. She didn’t know what to do.
“My father is on oxygen,” she explained to WFTV News. “I’m worried about this storm.”
Fortunately, fellow store patron Ramon Santiago was there to save the day.
Santiago had snatched up one of the last generators the store had in stock, and upon seeing Brekke in tears — and without even knowing the details of her dire situation — insisted she take his.
“It’s OK,” he assured her as they embraced in a hug. “Everything is OK.”
WFTV News reporter Nancy Alvarez caught the emotional exchange on video:
Alvarez shared the video on Facebook, noting she was “writing [the caption] through tears and with a heart full of pride for my community.”
Natural disasters bring about the worst of tragedies, but they tend to bring out the best in ourselves.
“She need the generator,” Santiago, whose first language is not English, explained to WFTV. “It’s OK. No worry for them.”
Now, as Irma — the strongest hurricane ever to be recorded in the Atlantic Ocean — propels through the Caribbean, Floridians are proving once again that fear is no match for compassion.
“I’m very overwhelmed by that man,” Brekke noted. “That gentleman was a great gentleman right there. God will bless that man.”
From Pakistan to Tanzania, the most effective education solutions are community-led. Here’s how local leaders, in partnership with Malala Fund and supported by Pura, are mobilizing entire communities.
When asked to describe what Tanzania smells like, Grace Isekore closes her eyes and breathes in deep. For a moment, she’s somewhere else entirely. Tanzania is a rich tapestry of sights and scents, from the smell of sea mist that permeates the coastline to the earthy cardamom and cloves she cooks with in her kitchen. But when Grace emerges from her reverie, her answer is unexpected.
“Tanzania smells like peace,” she says, her eyes still closed. “I see a beautiful country where we are free to move, free to speak. And there is peace within the community.”
For Grace, that sense of peace isn’t just something she smells; it’s something she works toward every day. As a project coordinator with Pastoral Women’s Council (PWC), a women-led organization that empowers pastoralist communities in northern Tanzania, she has seen firsthand how girls flourish when they have the opportunity to attend school. Like scent, education not only connects girls to their own culture, but also helps broaden their horizons, realizing new possibilities for themselves and others. That transformation reshapes entire communities and ripples outward, with the potential to change countries and transform the world for the better.
Different scents, different approaches, and communities driving change
Spices in Tanzania. Captured by James Roh for Pura
For Grace and others around the world, education is freedom, as well as a pathway to a stronger community. Rooted in that shared belief, Pura, a home fragrance company, was inspired to build on their four-year partnership with Malala Fund to create something truly unique: a fragrance collection that connects people through scent to communities in Tanzania, Nigeria, Pakistan, and Brazil, where barriers to girls’ education are among the highest.
Using ingredients from each region, the new Pura x Malala Fund Collection uses scent to transport people to these regions directly. “Future in Bloom,” for example, invokes Pakistan’s lush valleys through notes of jasmine, cedarwood, and mango; while Tanzania’s fragrance, “Heart on Fire,” evokes the spirit and joyfulness of the girls who live there through cardamom, lemon, and green tea.
The new Collection honors the work Malala Fund does every day, partnering with locally-led organizations in these four countries to ensure every girl can access and complete 12 years of education. Each scent celebrates the joy, tenacity, and courage of the women and girls driving change on the ground, while also augmenting Pura’s annual grant to Malala Fund by donating eight percent of net revenue from the Pura x Malala Fund Collection to Malala Fund directly.
Just as each country’s scent is unique, so too are their needs related to education. But with support from Malala Fund and Pura, local leaders are coming up with creative ways to mobilize entire communities (parents, teachers, elders, and the students themselves, in their pursuit of solutions, understanding that educating girls helps everyone thrive. Here’s how their efforts are creating real, durable impact in Tanzania and Pakistan, and creating a ripple effect that changes the world for the better.
Parent-teacher associations help Maasai girls and their communities in Tanzania problem-solve
A girl’s school in Tanzania. Captured by James Roh for Pura
Northern Tanzania, Grace’s home, is home to pastoralist communities like the Maasai, a nomadic people who have moved with the seasons to nurture the land and care for their livestock for centuries. The nomadic nature of this lifestyle creates significant and unique barriers to girls’ education. Longstanding gender roles have enabled Maasai to survive in the harsh environment and have placed great value on both women and men. Over time, as nomadic life has been threatened by the privatization of land and stationary education models have been implemented, the reality of pastoralist livelihood has shifted and introduced new complexities. Now, the sheer distance to schools is both a practical challenge and one that often comes with danger from the landscape, predators, and potential exposure to assault along the journey. Girls shoulder the responsibility of household chores and there is often cultural pressure around early marriage – both leading to boys’ education being prioritized over girls’.
“There are very, very good [pastoralist] cultural practices, which are passed from generation to generation,” says Janet Kimori, an English teacher at Lekule Girls Secondary School in Longido, Tanzania. But when cultural practices act as educational barriers, “you have to sit down and look for where you are going to assist. As a school, as an individual, the school administration—all of us will chip in and know how we are going to deal with this problem.”
PWC works to ensure girls are able to exercise their right to an education while also preserving pastoralist culture. One successful approach, the organization found, has been the formation of Parent Teacher Associations (PTAs), created with help from Malala Fund. In PTA meetings, students, parents, teachers, elders, and government officials meet, discuss educational barriers, and come up with community-led solutions that preserve and honor their culture while advancing educational outcomes.
PTA meeting in Tanzania. Captured by James Roh for Pura
One recent PTA meeting highlights how these community-led solutions are often the most effective. At Lekule Girls Secondary School, the lack of fresh water forces girls to walk long distances to collect water for the school’s kitchen during the school day, and these long journeys not only disrupt class time but can leave girls vulnerable to sexual assault in isolated areas. Through facilitated discussion, PTA members landed on a solution: installing a borehole to pipe in fresh water to the school. Reliable access to water creates a better learning environment for the girls, but it also benefits the community at large, as local governments are then more likely to invest in health clinics and other community resources nearby.
With a solution in place, the PTA was then able to discuss ideas and map out a course of action. The women would raise money for the cost of the borehole, while the men would recruit workers to dig the hole and lay the pipe. Together, they would ask government officials to match their investment.
The benefits of PTA meetings within the pastoralist communities are undeniable. “The girls are talking and addressing issues in a confident way, and parents feel they are part of the resource team to solve challenges happening at school,” Grace says. One unexpected benefit: The larger cultural impact these PTA meetings have created. Thanks to the success of PTAs within pastoralist communities, the models are now being endorsed on a national level, and schools across Tanzania are starting to use them to solve problems in their own communities. When a community creates opportunities for girls to learn, everyone benefits.
Safe spaces in rural Pakistan help students and their parents connect, then drive change
Safe space for girls meeting in Pakistan. Captured by Insiya Syed.
A continent away in Pakistan, the country’s northernmost region of Gilgit-Baltistan seems like a land untouched by time. The region’s looming mountains, snow-capped peaks, lush valleys and crystalline lakes draw nature lovers and landscape photographers from around the world, but living among this kind of breathtaking scenery has its drawbacks. Schools in the region are few and far between, and the area’s harsh climate often makes roads inaccessible for travel. Poverty and gender-based discrimination are additional obstacles, making school even further out of reach, and girls are affected disproportionately. Going up against these barriers requires a persistent, quiet strength that’s found in the women who live there and reflected in Pakistan’s signature scent.
Saheli Circles are how local leaders in Gilgit-Baltistan are bridging the gap between girls and education. An Urdu term for “female friend,” Saheli Circles are after-school safe spaces where girls explore subjects like art and climate change, while also developing skills that help them manage emotions, set goals, and build positive relationships. Girls study in groups, visit the library, play sports, and tackle filmmaking and photography projects, all designed to develop self confidence and teach the girls how to advocate for issues that matter to them. But the work doesn’t stop there.
“What we’re trying to achieve here will only be impactful if it trickles down to the home environment and the school environment,” says Marvi Sumro, founder and program director of Innovate, Educate, and Inspire Pakistan (IEI), the local organization that developed the Saheli Circles model and partnered with Malala Fund in 2021 to make it a reality. Ever since, Saheli Circles have grown to involve teachers, elders, and parents to encourage relationship building that’s essential for young girls and adolescents. “Our spaces can give mothers and daughters an opportunity to interact a little differently—do an art activity, or have a cup of tea together, or some good conversation,” Marvi says.
The relationship building is what makes the biggest positive impact throughout the community. Recently, one Saheli Circle was able to bring together parents, teachers, and administrators to advocate for better education at their local school, and together they convinced the department of education to hire a science teacher. Another Saheli Circle organized a fund where members of the community can contribute monthly to pay for uniforms, books, and other school expenses for the girls in their village, eliminating those small, hidden costs that are often a barrier to education for many. A third Saheli Circle was able to produce a short film about how gender-based household chores can take away valuable study time from girls, leaving them at a disadvantage. “The girls put the film together and showed it to the mothers, and the response from the mothers was just beautiful,” Marvi says.
Girls smiling in Pakistan. Captured by Insiya Syed.
The education and relationship building that the girls receive in Saheli Circles connects them to larger opportunities and economic freedom that are not possible in their hometown. “For girls in Gilgit-Baltistan, education is extremely important because of the fact that we’re so far away from where the economy is, where the opportunity is. Education becomes this bridge for us, for our girls, to access all the opportunity and economy that exists in [larger cities].”
From rural Tanzania to remote Pakistan, local organizations prove every day that prioritizing girls’ education benefits everyone. Communities that lift up girls are able to secure resources like clean water and well-staffed schools, as well as build stronger relationships.
These outcomes are only possible because of the women and girls who work tirelessly in these regions to overcome barriers and drive progress. The Pura x Malala Fund Collection is a way to honor them, celebrate their achievements, and unite people the world over around a shared belief that education is freedom. Like scent, that belief can build, travel, and has the possibility to transform the world.
Experience the Pura x Malala Fund Collection here, and connect with the stories of real girls leading change across the globe.
We live in an age of conflict. Sharp political and social divides are everywhere, and while it’s easy to theoretically write off people who disagree with us on fundamental core issues and values, the reality is that we often must co-exist with them and learn to manage our conflicts in a healthy way. Sometimes that means putting aside our differences and “agreeing to disagree.” Something it means hashing them out.
The quickest way to stop having a constructive dialog with someone is when they become defensive. This usually results in them digging in their heels and making you defensive. This can result in a vicious cycle of back-and-forth defensive behavior that can feel impossible to break. Once that happens, the walls go up, the gloves come off and resolving the situation becomes tough.
Ripley is a bestselling author and the co-founder of Good Conflict, a media and training company that helps people reimagine conflict. Not surprisingly, she’s in high demand on news programs, conferences, and media summits these days.
How to have a constructive conversation
Let’s say you believe the room should be painted red and your spouse says it should be blue. Instead of saying, “I think blue is ugly,” you can say, “It’s interesting that you say that…” and ask them to explain why they chose blue.
The key phrase is: “It’s interesting that you say that…”
It shows genuine curiosity in their point of view. That’s critical to avoid someone shutting down on you.
Two men shake hands while a woman looks on. Photo credit: Canva
When you show the other person that you genuinely care about their thoughts and appreciate their reasoning, they let down their guard. This makes them feel heard and encourages them to hear your side as well. This approach also encourages the person you disagree with to consider coming up with a collaborative solution instead of arguing to defend their position.
It’s important to assume the other person has the best intentions while listening to them make their case. “To be genuinely curious, we need to refrain from judgment and making negative assumptions about others. Assume the other person didn’t intend to annoy you. Assume they are doing the best they can. Assume the very best about them. You’ll appreciate it when others do it for you,” Kaitlyn Skelly at The Ripple Effect Education writes.
Look out for signs of defensiveness like blaming, criticizing, making excuses, or being passive-aggressive. These are warning signals that your conversation is veering off the rails.
Phrases you can use to avoid an argument
The curiosity approach can also involve affirming the other person’s perspective while adding your own, using a phrase like, “On the one hand, I see what you’re saying. On the other hand…”
Here are some other phrases you can use:
“I wonder if…”
“It’s interesting that you say that because I see it differently…”
“I might be wrong, but…”
“How funny! I had a different reaction…”
“I hadn’t thought of it like that! For me, though, it seems…”
“I think I understand your point, though I look at it a little differently…”
Two men high-fiving one another. Photo credit: Canva
What’s the best way to disagree with people?
A 2016 study from Yale University supports Ripley’s ideas. The study found that when people argue to “win,” they take a hard line and only see one correct answer in the conflict. Whereas those who want to “learn” are more likely to see that there is more than one solution to the problem. At that point, competition magically turns into collaboration.
“Being willing to hear out other perspectives and engage in dialogue that isn’t simply meant to convince the other person you’re right can lead to all sorts of unexpected insights,” psychologist and marketing professor Matthew Fisher at Southern Methodist University tells CNBC.
The key words are “willing” and “genuine.” These phrases aren’t magic bullets designed to help you level your opponents. You have to actually, truly be willing to learn about their perspective and be open to changing your mind.
Let me know in the comments if this data rings true to you and your experience of conflict. And check out danharris.com for more from Amanda Ripley including what she has to say about “conflict entrepreneurs,”people who inflame turmoil to benefit themselves. #conflict#healthyconflict#communication#tenpercenthappier#10percenthappier
Another common tip that usually comes from the world of couple’s counseling is to stop seeing the other person as your adversary. If you can imagine the two of you on the same team versus the problem, your conversations will be more productive.
In a world of strong opinions and differing perspectives, curiosity can be a superpower that helps you have more constructive conversations with those with whom you disagree. All it takes is a little humility and an open mind, and you can turn conflict into collaboration, building bridges instead of walls.
This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.
Look, let’s just get it out there: It’s uncomfortable any time you have to get fully or partially naked for a medical exam or cosmetic procedure. Right? It’s natural and part of the process, but while you know that the person on the other end is a professional who’s just there to do their job, they’re also a human being. Getting naked in front of them in any other context would be extremely weird, and it’s hard to completely shut that part of your brain off no matter the setting.
It’s amazing how body dysmorphia really knows no bounds. We tend to think of insecurities as focusing on things like the flatness of our stomachs or the size of our noses. But perhaps the thing that people are most self-conscious about is the thing we actually talk about the least.
According to one study, about 30% of men are “dissatisfied” with the size, shape, or appearance of their penis. That number is even higher when it comes to how women feel about their vaginas. A survey done by Refinery29 showed that almost half of women had “concerns” about the appearance of their vulva.
The numbers say anywhere from a third to a half or more of all people think there’s something wrong with the way our private parts look. Which begs the question: If we all think we’re weird, is anybody really weird at all?
A fascinating Reddit thread recently polled experts on this very topic—people who tend to see an awful lot of genitals in their line of work: Waxing technicians or estheticians. The responses were oddly inspiring.
The prompt asked, “Waxers, how often are you surprised by how a clients genitals look?”
Professional waxers chimed in with their stories and observations. As did doctors, nurses, pelvic floor therapists, urologists, and lots of other pros who work closely with people’s unmentionables.
“Gonna chime in as a doctor – and I would imagine it’s the same for professional waxers. WE. DONT. CARE. And in my case I would be surprised if you’d show me something I’ve never seen before.” – feelgoodx
“I use to be very self conscious and insecure about my genitals. I honestly thought I had a weird vagina. But working in this industry has taught me that every one is a snowflake. I’ve seen it all and nothing surprises me. Just clean yourself before coming in.” – Wild-Clementine
Not a waxer but I am a labor and delivery nurse. I see a vulva every single day I work, often multiple, and frequently about 3 feet from my face with a spotlight on it lol. Not much surprises me. Most are out of my memory by the time they’re clothed or covered up. When it comes to genitals you want to be unremarkable.” – tlotd
“Very, very rarely. Shaved, not shaved, lots o’ labia, no labia, etc—it’s all the same to me. I’m just here to work.” – Important-Tackle
“never. i have seen it all. scars, hyperpigmentation, unevenness; none of it surprises me. just please wash yourself before coming to me.” – pastelmorning
“Nothing surprises me, I’m mostly just focusing on the hair, but i do have a client who has a tuft of hair on the underside of his shaft near the tip of his penis we call his downstairs soul patch.” – noorisms
Two big takeaways:
First, outside of obvious mutilations or pathologies, nothing stands out to people who are extremely knowledgeable about genitals. Differences in size, shape, and structure are totally normal and barely even register on the radar!
Second, no matter what you look like down there, good hygiene is always appreciated. A solid tip that extends far beyond the borders of the esthetician’s office!
Being embarrassed, self-conscious, or even ashamed of the way your parts look doesn’t seem like a big deal, but it can be.
It’s bizarre and tragic that unrealistic beauty standards actually affect the way we perceive our own nether regions. Pornography, media, and inconsiderate past partners all play a role in people developing anxiety about the way their genitals look.
Both men and women can have their sex lives negatively impacted by bad self-image and anxiety over the way they look naked. When the shame is really bad, it can hold them back in relationships, or even stop them from seeking them in the first place.
This shame or embarrassment unfortunately extends into the medical arena, as well.
Fear of being judged or humiliated can stop women in particular from not just going in for a wax, but from going to the gynecologist, getting breast exams, or asking potentially-embarrassing but critical and life-saving health questions. For their part, men are prone to skipping prostate exams, testicular exams, or conversations about potentially embarrassing topics like erectile dysfunction or bladder problems. None of these things are fun or comfortable, but they’re critical for our health!
Experts say sharing your vulnerability with your doctor or cosmetic professional can help. Letting them know you’re nervous or embarrassment can signal them to offer you comfort measures. It also helps to be really direct and detailed with what you want or what you want to discuss.
According to Cedars Sinai, “Does sex hurt? Tell your doctor exactly where you feel the pain. Notice that your poop stinks? Try to describe the odor in detail.” If you’re too embarrassed to talk about it, try writing it down. At some point though, you’ll have to get the exam. Just get through it, it gets easier once you build a relationship with your doctor (or waxer!) over time.
If you’ve ever been a little self-conscious, take it from the experts, from the people who have seen hundreds if not thousands of genitals up close and personal, in the most unflattering lighting and from the worst angles possible: You’re totally normal!
This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.
Odds are you’ve heard Wally de Backer, aka Gotye, and his song “Somebody That I Used to Know.” It’s the Australian musician’s biggest commercial hit, selling more than 20 million copies since its release in 2011, making it one of the best-selling digital singles of all time. Not to mention it inspired several amazing covers, which you might have also stumbled upon.
The music video, in its poignant simplicity, is every bit as iconic. Gotye stands naked facing the camera, as featured singer Kimbra faces him. As they sing, they are slowly “painted” into and out of the background of geometric shapes using stop motion animation. There’s a very Wes Anderson feel to it that adds so much to the story told in the song, making it all the more memorable.
This dance troupe was up to the task
All this to say…it would be a challenge to recreate the magic that’s so inherent in the original. And yet, Netherland-based dance troupe CDK clearly understood the assignment with their highly stylized movement performance set to the well-known art pop ballad.
As thousands of viewers were quick to note, it’s not just the incredible dance moves that made this performance so captivating. It’s the killer combination of choreography, camerawork and costumes that make the piece impossible to turn away from.
“This is pure art,” one person wrote. While another added, “I think I’m going to watch it everyday for the rest of my life.”
Watch CDK’s Stunning Performance Here
This group is clearly at the top of their game, simply by how easy they make it all look (like, I’ve already convinced myself that I can pull off those moves). But what’s more evident is that they enjoy what they’re doing to the nth degree. Over on their Instagram page, you’ll find equally mesmerizing routines set to Billie Eilish, Nicki Minaj, and more.
1: Gotye allows small independent projects, like student films—and probably this dance piece—to use his music free of charge. “If someone wants to use it commercially I look at what the budget is and the creativity of the project,” he said, according to News.com.
2: CDK isn’t the only group to have recently breathed new life into the song. Also in 2024, an electronic remix of the song titled “Somebody (2024),” created by electronic music producers Chris Lake, Fisher, and Sante Sansone, debuted. Much like its predecessor, “Somebody (2024) topped the charts.
This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.
Doing laundry can be a bewildering process. For starters, most people don’t know how to properly use a washing machine (or what wash cycles actually do.)
Laundry also presents challenges when it comes to removing odors. And many people don’t know how often they should *really* be washing their sheets.
Even for the most seasoned launderers, there is always a new laundry skill or lesson to learn. On Reddit, a wife struggling “for years” to remove sweat stains in the armpits of her husband’s undershirts shared what finally worked for her.
Wife removes husband’s pit stains
User Bupperoni shared with fellow laundry enthusiasts on the social media platform that she discovered the laundry hack after being fed up with her normal go-to detergent.
“I have been at a loss with my husband’s undershirt pit stains/buildup for years,” she explains. “Recently, I learned that my detergent is crap (All Free & Clear) and it was recommended here that I try adding Biz until my detergent runs out.”
Next, she explains that she “took around 20 of my husband’s undershirts” and applied Biz to them by creating a paste.
“I put some Biz in a cup with water to make a paste and one by one I poured the paste onto each armpit (inside and outside) and lightly scrubbed with a toothbrush. After that I let them sit for an hour,” she explains. “Then I added 1/2 cup of Biz to the washer, added the shirts, then added detergent. I washed with hot water and did an extra rinse cycle.”
The end result was a major success. “They came out so good! They aren’t perfectly white but the greasy deodorant, sweat, and dead skin buildup is gone!” she added.
What is Biz?
Biz is an enzymatic laundry powder that contains a number of enzymes (including lipase) to break down lipids (fats) and oils. It also comes in liquid form.
It was invented in 1968. Laundry lovers on Reddit sing its praises, with many calling it “the best kept laundry secret.” One fan of Biz shared:
“I had given up hope on the armpit stains on our workout clothes, but today, I decided to soak them in Biz before washing and it’s like they were never there! I didn’t even bother making a paste and leaving them on the pit area — just 1/2 cup in a medium load using the auto soak feature in our washing machine for 1 hour. I wish I had before and after pics!”
It is also affordable. A 60 ounce box of Biz powder (available at Walmart) sells for $6.53, which can take care of 40-60 loads. The cost breakdown is about 11 cents per wash.
Lipase is one of the most important ingredients in laundry right now, and here’s why you should care!!! Lipase is an enzyme that breaks down fat and oil and is the same thing your body uses to digest a greasy meal. In detergents and stain removers, it targets sebum, which is the body oil your skin produces constantly. Sebum is the number one stain on your clothes, and when it builds up it causes yellowing and body odor. Here’s how enzymes work: think of them as tiny scissors. They cut big molecules into small ones so surfactants and water can actually wash them away. And unlike surfactants, enzymes aren’t destroyed in the process, they work over and over, which is why a little goes a long way with enzymatic pretreatments. The most important thing with enzymes: give them time. Just like digestion, they need to sit and work. Minimum one hour, maximum one week. When you’re reading ingredient labels, look for lipase, protease, amylase, cellulase, and mannanase. Each one targets something different. I like to keep my enzymatic stain remover on my hamper and pretreat stains when I take my clothes off. Do you want me to talk more about the different types of enzymes in laundry products? #laundry#detergent#cleantok
Professional dry cleaner explains what causes pit stains
Zachary Pozniak, a professional dry cleaner who runs YouTube channel Jeeves NY, breaks down why removing sweat stains can be so difficult. He explains that the root cause of pit stains is sebum.
“Your body produces around 40 grams of oil everyday. It’s called sebum,” he says. “It lubricates and protects our skin and hair.”
He adds that sebum is the main cause behind body odor and acne, and also causes yellowing of clothing.
“Over time, sebum will oxidize, or turn things yellow,” he shares. “This is the same exact thing that happens to apples or avocadoes, and this is commonly seen on the underarm area.”
During an episode from the latest season of Love on the Spectrum, Netflix’s heartwarming, critically acclaimed reality series that follows autistic individuals navigating the complexities of relationships, two fan favorites—Madison Marilla and her now fiancée, Tyler White—shared a moment that many couples face regardless of neurodivergence: emotional triggers.
As the two approached their date location, a fan can be heard saying, “Maddie! I love you!” This visibly affected Marilla, who explained that her autism causes “black and white thinking.” So hearing a nickname, like “Maddie,” causes her to feel “anxious and thrown off.” In fact, she noted it’s one of her “biggest sensitivities.”
In an Instagram post, marriage counselors Chris & Jamie Bailey break down how the couple’s handling of the situation was a prime example for anyone who witnesses their significant other getting triggered.
Chris and Jamie noted that in the clip, White stayed calm, moved towards Madison, validated her feelings without judgment, stayed present in the situation, listened to understand, and then, after Madison was able to express herself, he reassured her that they are a team and that he is there for her.
And for her part, Madison “chose to process what was happening instead of reacting.” She also reminded herself that “it was going to be ok” and “moved forward” rather than ruminate.
All relationships deal with triggers
While relationships involving autism or other forms of neurodiversity have their own unique set of challenges, Chris and Jamie noted that every couple will at some point face triggers. When that happens, each partner has a “responsibility.” The triggered person is responsible for their emotional regulation, while the non-triggered person is responsible for offering support. Both Tyler and Madison exemplified what can go right when each partner takes on their individual responsibility—especially staying present.
“What couples often miss is the simplicity of just remaining with your spouse during a trigger, “ Chris and Jamie added.
Judging by the comments, the Baileys were clearly not the only ones who felt Madison and Tyler offered a “masterclass in emotional regulation and communication.”
“This was incredibly impressive. The way she worked through a trigger, the way he supported her and validated it. Well done everyone. We could all learn from this. ❤️”
“Responding before reacting is something every single person I’ve ever met has struggled with. I love how hard she’s working to stay aware of her mind, heart and body and how best to keep them regulated in these really difficult situations.
“This was such an incredible thing to witness. I’m so grateful for Madison’s ability to be vulnerable through this and to allow the world the opportunity to learn from her 😭 I needed this today!
“These two humans are pure good. They totally get each other and provide such a safe space.”
“I love that Tyler didn’t even try to hug her or touch her and he let Madison’s nervous system calm down first. Full respect!!”
Expert-backed methods for dealing with emotional triggers in a relationship
For your own triggers, awareness is the first step. Many people notice physical cues before anything else. It might be a racing heart, a tight chest, or a sudden urge to withdraw or lash out. Naming what is happening, even silently, can help create space between the feeling and the reaction. Simple grounding techniques, like slowing your breathing, focusing on your senses, or giving yourself permission to pause, can make a meaningful difference. Just as Madison demonstrated, reminding yourself that the moment will pass can help shift your nervous system out of alarm mode.
When it comes to supporting a partner who is triggered, the goal isn’t to fix the feeling, but to help create safety. That often looks like staying calm, listening without interrupting, and validating what they are experiencing, even if you do not fully understand it. Avoid rushing them, minimizing their reaction, or immediately offering solutions. Instead, gentle reassurance and presence can go much further than advice.
Of course, this kind of mutual support works best when both people are willing to take ownership of their emotional patterns over time. Conversations outside of triggered moments can help partners learn each other’s sensitivities, boundaries, and preferred ways of being supported.
As Madison and Tyler remind us, when both people are willing to meet each other with awareness and care, even the most uncomfortable moments can become opportunities for deeper connection.
There’s a nationwide running joke that the food we get from fast-food places isn’t actually food. That doesn’t stop Americans from consuming it. But we do so assuming that this food, which can fossilize in the back of a minivan, is still edible. One man decided to see whether fast food contains enough nutrients to grow vegetables if it’s turned into soil.
Ted Nivison is not a scientist, and does not play one on television. For this experiment, though, he dons a metaphorical lab coat and gloves. After spending time growing his own vegetables, he wanted to see what would happen if he changed up the soil. But instead of adding something practical, like Miracle-Gro, he decided to get innovative.
Nivison set his sights on making his own soil from fast-food scraps. In a YouTube video, he’s seen placing a large box on his kitchen counter.
“This is a Lomi. This is a device that lets you turn food scraps into usable soil, or at least what the company calls ‘Lomi Earth,’” he explains. “Obviously, by food scraps, they mean things like vegetables and fruit, but this device can turn any food scraps into soil. So what would happen if I turned fast food into soil? Could I grow a plant from that?”
Surprisingly, the answer to his question was yes. The curious man went to the nearest McDonald’s and dumped two double cheeseburgers, two large fries, 20 chicken nuggets, and a pack of apple slices into the soil-making device. The small machine takes up to 20 hours to turn food into dirt, so Nivison ran some errands before returning to check on the progress.
“I don’t know what I expected to happen here,” he says before it cuts to a clip of him returning home. “I’ve left the Lomi going and my entire apartment smells like McDonald’s.”
When the video cuts back to the present, Nivison reveals, “I had to open up the windows in my apartment just to filter out the air that I was smelling, and I gotta say, the resulting dirt is a little bit creepy.”
He opens the lid to reveal a bright, reddish-brown, dry, clumpy soil that he says smells like Cheetos. The amateur scientist also describes the soil as greasy. This doesn’t dissuade him, though he muses that a plant might taste the soil and say, “I guess I’m not going to live.”
Unfortunately, the McDonald’s haul didn’t produce enough soil to fill a pot, so he decided to mix things up by creating soil from Taco Bell and KFC, too.
The soil from Taco Bell looks closest to actual potting soil, which he attributes to the food having more vegetables. But the soil from KFC was so incredibly greasy that you could hear it as he moved it around.
To conduct the experiment, he set up a control group, a nod to his high school science education. Then he split the dirt into multiple clay pots with varying levels of traditional potting soil mixed in. One pot contained soil created solely from the fast-food concoction.
It turns out the more Lomi dirt used, the harder the soil became when it was watered. Nivison speculates that this is due to the grease content:
“With 100% Lomi dirt, it looks like the surface of Mars. And I don’t even think the guy in The Martian would’ve been able to grow potatoes from this. This is worse than Mars dirt. It is gross. When I watered it, none of the water would seep into the dirt. It just sat on top, turning into something like a swamp.”
After seeing the progress of the plant grown in 10% fast-food dirt, he decided to increase the amount, making sure not to exceed 50%. Seeds planted in 50% to 100% fast-food dirt molded, but so did the seeds planted in 15% Lomi dirt. Unexpectedly, the arugula planted in 20% fast-food dirt sprouted, though it eventually stopped growing.
If you thought the control plant grew the best, you’d be just as shocked as Nivison. The control plant never got beyond the small initial sprouts. It was the plant soaking up that 10% mixture of greasy fast food that outgrew them all. All that experimenting made for a fairly hungry scientist, so he made an arugula salad.
Sexual Assault is a topic many people don’t want to think about, but it’s an unfortunate reality for some. Due to the topic being uncomfortable and often stigmatized, there can be a misunderstanding around how prevalent sexual assault is. Brittany Piper is an author, sexual assault educator, and survivor who uses a unique approach to highlight the number of those impacted.
April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, and April 1st marks the anniversary of Piper’s assault. To commemorate the occasion, she created a compilation video of an activity she performs during her training sessions at college campuses. The video was uploaded to her social media page, where it has amassed over four million views.
The video gives a visual representation of the startling statistics. Someone is sexually assaulted every minute in the United States, and every nine minutes, a child is sexually assaulted, according to RAINN. They also reveal that “An estimated 443,635 people age 12+ experience sexual violence each year in the U.S.” and that “26.4% of female and 6.8% of maleundergraduate students experience rape or sexual assault involving physical force, violence, or incapacitation.”
Those staggering statistics make Piper’s visual depiction more powerful. Piper focused the camera on different groups of college students in lecture halls. She asks the students to stand if they know someone who has experienced sexual assault or if they themselves have experienced it. In each video, nearly every student stands up. Piper tells the different groups of students to remain standing if the assault was reported. Almost instantly, the majority of people sat down.
As students look around taking inventory of how many were still standing, the educator asks one last question. For the few students who were still on their feet, she asked them to stay standing if the perpetrator received any punishment for their actions. In a heartbreaking visual, approximately 4 to 5 students remained standing in total.
“The creaking of chairs. It’s a visceral symphony etched into my bones,” Piper writes. She later adds, “Today, as I stitched together just a few of the stages my body remembers, the pattern is heartbreakingly clear. Every time, when I ask who knows a survivor, it’s always too many.”
Gen Z may have a clearer understanding of what constitutes sexual assault and be more likely to share their experience with others. A meta-analysis published by Science Direct that looks at ACE (adverse childhood experiences) scores shows Gen Z is less likely to have experienced childhood sexual assault than Gen X.
Viewers of the video were moved by the sheer number of people who sat back down. One person shares, “So many standing followed by so many sitting down breaks my heart.”
Another laments, “I guarantee the boys still sitting DO know someone who’s a survivor. They just don’t realize it because the person hasn’t told them.”
One man is calling for accountability, writing, “Men this is on us. We need to call anyone, anywhere, anytime we see something…. To start … let’s look in the mirror at our own behavior.”
Someone else has a sad revelation, writing, “It hits hard when you realize that she can do this in any city in the usa and get the exact same results. She wasn’t surprised, she knew what would happen when she asked those questions, no matter where she was in the usa.”
“The visual is overwhelming. Made me cry,” another person says.
“Thank you for your work. This is a such powerful way to show rape culture and the impunity in our society,” someone shares.
Editor’s Note: If you or someone you know has been a victim of sexual assault, you’re not alone. RAINN offers free, confidential support, 24/7 in English and Spanish through their National Sexual Assault Hotline. Call 1-800-656-HOPE (4637), text “HOPE” to 64673 or chat at RAINN.org/hotline.
Iced coffee is a must for many Americans. A 2025 survey from the National Coffee Association reported that 31% of Americans have iced coffee daily.
And Americans are shelling out their hard-earned cash for it. Data from food research firm Technomic found that in 2023, Americans spent $17.7 billion on iced coffee drinks. Coffee prices in the U.S. are also on the rise, and an August 2025 report noted that the average cost for hot coffee was $3.52, and $5.47 for cold brew.
Frugal people looking to save money on their daily coffee fix took to Reddit where a trucker shared his affordable iced coffee recipe. It’s earning major praise from his fellow frugal foodies.
49-cent iced coffee hack
User asu3dvl explained how he keeps his iced coffee costs down while on the road:
“Trucker here. Every morning I mix two tablespoons of Great Value 100% Columbian instant coffee into my 20 oz Stanley tumbler. A splash of Hazelnut creamer and add water and ice. Shake it up,” he shared.
He noted how affordable it is, as well as how “It’s like $0.49 a day, lasts me all morning and keeps me sane when I roll through your town as you people try to kill yourselves around my 40 ton 18 wheeler. 🤣🤣🤣 The coffee and the large creamer last around three weeks.”
He also added, “Tastes just as good if not better than the fresh brewed stuff we get out here, anyway.”
A former barista commented, “I worked in a coffee shop for years and I drink instant now. Its come a long way.”
Fellow iced coffee drinkers offered their best iced coffee tips to save money.
“I really like Cafe Altura instant coffee. They have one of the best instant coffees I’ve ever had and it’s a medium roast! It’s a bit spendy, but def less if you’re buying coffee from a coffee shop.” – 4077
“Juan Valdez makes great instant coffee too.” – jameson71
“Try Bustelo instant!” – disasterous_fjord
“I use about a cup and 1/3-ish of milk, 3 tablespoons of brown sugar, a couple of ice cubes, 2 scoops (I think they are tsp, but I have them heaping) of instant coffee. And a tiny bit of vanilla. I put it in a blender and tastes like a Tim Hortons Iced Capp. Instant coffee is super handy for iced coffee drinks! To make black coffee, I don’t like instant, but with milk and brown sugar, its so good!” – Just_Cake4512
“Cold brew concentrate is another good one for anyone who wants to level up from instant without spending starbucks money. throw ground coffee in a mason jar with water overnight, strain it in the morning, and you’ve got concentrate that lasts like a week in the fridge. cost works out to maybe 30-40 cents a cup. but honestly 49 cents a day for something that keeps you sane while driving an 18 wheeler through traffic is probably one of the best ROI purchases anyone in this sub is making lol.” – Couponpicked
“Try Taster’s Choice medium dark, next time you get a chance, also available at Walmart.” – ditto3000
“There’s a somewhat famous finance youtuber who had pretty much the same recipe for his “20 cent iced coffee” compared to coffee chains’ iced coffee:
– make a pot of coffee (i think he grinds his own beans) – put the whole pot in the fridge overnight – add mocha creamer (or whatever) to taste the next day. 20 cent (or is it 10 cent) ice coffee. save $5 (this was at the time, save more $ now).
I think the main part is the overnight icing of the coffee in the fridge. if you just add ice cubes to making it straight away its not the same.” -Silly-avocatoe