graveyard

Twitter user Matt, who goes by the name @SixthFormPoet, shared a dark love story on Twitter that's been read by nearly 600,000 people. It starts in a graveyard and feels like it could be the premise for a Tim Burton film.

While it's hard to verify whether the story is true, Matt insists that it's real, so we'll believe him.

Hello, good morning. A ridiculous but ENTIRELY TRUE story coming up, told in three parts. Ten tweets per part so you might want to a) make a strong coffee, or b) ignore me
— sixthformpoet (@sixthformpoet) June 9, 2019

ONE

My dad died. Classic start to a funny story. He was buried in a small village in Sussex. I was really close to my dad so I visited his grave a lot. I still do. [DON'T WORRY, IT GETS FUNNIER.]
— sixthformpoet (@sixthformpoet) June 9, 2019

I always took flowers and my mum visited a lot and she always took flowers and my grandparents were still alive then and they always took flowers. My dad's grave frequently resembled a solid third place at the Chelsea Flower Show.
— sixthformpoet (@sixthformpoet) June 9, 2019

Nice but I felt bad for the guy buried next to my dad. He NEVER had flowers. Died on Christmas Day aged 37, no one left him flowers and now there's a pop-up florist in the grave next door. So I started buying him flowers. I STARTED BUYING FLOWERS FOR A DECEASED MAN I'D NEVER MET.
— sixthformpoet (@sixthformpoet) June 9, 2019

I did this for quite some time, but I never mentioned it to anyone. It was a little private joke with myself, I was making the world a better place one bunch of flowers at a time. I know it sounds weird but I came to think of him as a friend.
— sixthformpoet (@sixthformpoet) June 9, 2019

I wondered if there was a hidden connection between us, something secretly drawing me to him. Maybe we went to the same school, played for the same football club or whatever. So I googled his name, and ten seconds later I found him.
— sixthformpoet (@sixthformpoet) June 9, 2019

His wife didn't leave him flowers BECAUSE HE'D MURDERED HER. ON CHRISTMAS DAY. After he murdered his wife, he murdered her parents too. And after that he jumped in front of the only train going through Balcombe tunnel that Christmas night.
— sixthformpoet (@sixthformpoet) June 9, 2019

THAT was why no one ever left him flowers. No one except me, of course. I left him flowers. I left him flowers every couple of weeks. Every couple of weeks FOR TWO AND A HALF YEARS.
— sixthformpoet (@sixthformpoet) June 9, 2019

I felt terrible for his wife and her parents. Now, I wasn't going to leave them flowers every couple of weeks for two and a half years but I did feel like I owed them some sort of apology.
— sixthformpoet (@sixthformpoet) June 9, 2019

I found out where they were buried, bought flowers and drove to the cemetery. As I was standing at their graves mumbling apologies, a woman appeared behind me. She wanted to know who I was and why I was leaving flowers for her aunt and grandparents. AWKWARD.
— sixthformpoet (@sixthformpoet) June 9, 2019

I explained and she said ok that's weird but quite sweet. I said thanks, yes it is a bit weird and oh god I ASKED HER OUT FOR A DRINK. Incredibly, she said yes. Two years later she said yes again when I asked her to marry me because that is how I met my wife.

[END]
— sixthformpoet (@sixthformpoet) June 9, 2019

Matt's thread has to be the greatest "how I met my wife" stories ever told. Just to think, if that man had never murdered himself and his family, he never would have met the love of his life. It shows how life is never cut and dry. Misfortune can lead to fortune and that's how the whole darn human comedy keeps perpetuating itself.

The graveyard story is part one of three tales shared by Matt on June 9. The others are amusing stories are about a trip to Disneyland and the death of a neighbor.

The dark and twisted folks on Twitter had some great responses to Matt's tale.

Do either of you live in fear of Christmas Day?
— geoff foden (@hangerhead) June 9, 2019

THIS IS A FILM. MAKE THIS A FILM
— Rafael Schacter (@RafaelSchacter) June 9, 2019

This is the best thing I've heard in a long while. My husband is terminally ill and I read this allowed to him and he loved it too. It's wonderful how love can come out of a sad and weird thing. Congratulations to you both x
— Hannah (@mrs_h_allen) June 9, 2019

PLEASE MAKE IT A FILM AND CALL IT "GRAVEHEART"
— wer-a-wolf (@howlariouswolf) June 9, 2019

Technically it would be FIVE Funerals and a Wedding.

1. sixth's dad
2. dude buried in grave next to sixth's dad
3. dude's wife
4 & 5. dude's parents-in-law
— G C (@SmileSimplify) June 9, 2019

Man, Cupid must have been high on shrooms when he cooked this one up
— Why All The Anger? (@WhyAllTheAnger) June 9, 2019