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President Obama stood up for trans students in a HUGE way. Here's what you need to know.

The administration alerts schools everywhere to respect trans students' gender identities.

On Friday morning, the Obama administration issued guidance urging school districts around the country to treat transgender students equally.

This comes just days after Attorney General Loretta Lynch spoke her way into the history books in addressing the transgender community directly, saying, "The Department of Justice and the entire Obama administration wants you to know that we see you; we stand with you; and we will do everything we can to protect you going forward."

With today's letter, it looks like the administration is taking major steps in putting action behind those words. And. It. Is. Awesome.

Photo by Mark Wilson/Getty Images.

But let's take a moment to address what are sure to be some common questions about this guidance, shall we?

1. What is it?

It's essentially a letter to the schools from the president. And while it's not legally binding, it's putting school districts across the country on notice not to discriminate against transgender students; after all, they survive based on federal funding and should follow federal guidelines.

“A school may not require transgender students to use facilities inconsistent with their gender identity or to use individual-user facilities when other students are not required to do so," the letter reads.

That's pretty freakin' huge. Just a few years ago, to think the word "transgender" would even be part of the president's vocabulary would seem like a stretch. Now, he's out there dishing out guidelines and showing support like it's nobody's business.

2. Why now?

Given everything that's going on in North Carolina regarding the state's new controversial law that paints trans people as predators, the dueling lawsuits between the administration and the state — and just the general sense of hostility trans people are facing — now's as good a time as ever to remind everybody what the administration's position on trans student rights is.

Also, the alternative to this is ... having North Carolina-style battles state by state? That sounds exhausting.

When Fox News says you've gone too far... GIF from Fox News.

3. What kind of discrimination will this address?

Specifically, this deals with restrooms and locker rooms. Trans girls (i.e., girls who were assigned male at birth) and trans boys (i.e., boys who were assigned female at birth) should be able to use girls' and boys' restrooms respectively. This complements 2014 guidelines from the Department of Education clarifying that trans students are covered under Title IX of the Civil Rights Act. This guidance from the presidential administration just clarifies it a bit more.

In other words, trans students need to be protected the same way we protect other groups on the basis of race, gender, religion, national origin, etc.

This will affect students like 15-year-old Jazz Jennings. Photo by Valerie Macon/AFP/Getty Images.

4. But whoa, whoa, whoa: Won't this put students at risk of being spied on by students who are only pretending to be transgender?

No, no — a thousand times no. It might sound like a valid concern, but some of the largest school districts in in the country have had trans-inclusive policies in place for yeeeeeaars without aaaaaany incidents of that happening.

While some people (looking at you, Mike Huckabee) jokingly say they'd like to act out the plot of "Ladybugs" in real life, it just doesn't actually happen.

Um, Gov. Huckabee...? And do people still take group showers in schools anyway?

5. Why are restrooms so important anyway? Why can't trans kids just use restrooms separate from other students?

While this sounds like a reasonable compromise, quarantining them away from other students doesn't exactly say, "Hi! We see you for who you are!" so much as "You're weeeeeird!"

But what's the big deal about letting trans students use restrooms that match their consistently-held gender identity (again, no, a male cisgender person cannot just go, "Today, I feel like a woman" and then switch between genders to spy on women)? I mean, if you're seeing other people's genitals when you use the bathroom, you're bathrooming wrong. No one's privacy is being invaded (no one has a right to know what your genitals look like, regardless of whether you're trans or not), and people really need to chill out.

What exactly do you think people do in bathrooms?

And there needs to be consistency across the country. Imagine a trans boy in California, who's been using the boys' bathroom, moves into a different school district in another state and suddenly has to undergo an embarrassing public battle to get his gender recognized by his new school district.

6. How will people react to this announcement?

Prepare for this to be presented in a way that makes it seem like the gates of hell have been opened and innocent souls are being pulled into fiery sinkholes in the shapes of those bathroom sign stick figures that are like half-dress and half-pants.

Like this, but with fire, OK?

7. What do the 2016 presidential candidates think about this?

The two remaining candidates for the Democratic nomination would appear to be on the president's side on the matter, as they've both denounced North Carolina's anti-trans law and put forward very LGBT-inclusive platforms.

On the Republican side, Donald Trump at first said he didn't care what bathroom people use and that he didn't think North Carolina's law was a good one, but then switched his position, saying that states should be allowed to handle things at their level (as North Carolina is doing).

Additionally, the Republican National Committee "calls on the Department of Education to rescind itsinterpretation of Title IX that wrongly includes facility use issues by transgender students" and "encourages state legislatures to enact laws thatprotect student privacy and limit the use of restrooms, locker rooms, and similar facilities to members ofthe sex to whom the facility is designated." So, it's safe to say they're not exactly fans.

8. What happens now?

It's anybody's guess really. It looks like both sides on this issue are getting ready for a long, ugly fight. However radical this seems right now, there will be a day where it seems hard to believe this was ever an issue. When you're on the right side of history — as the Obama administration is in this case — you'll come out on top.

We need to see past the talking points and the hypothetical horror stories and dig deep in our hearts to offer these students some compassion. This is a BIG step forward.

Thanks, Obama. For reals.

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Passenger on 274-day cruise is surprised to learn the one word you can't say on the ship

"It's like saying 'Macbeth' in a theater."

via Mattew Barra/Pexels
There's one word you can't say on a cruise ship.

There are some things you just don't say. You don't yell out "bomb!" on an airplane, make jokes about carrying weapons while going through security, or, as Michael Scott from The Office knows, loudly proclaim that a boat you're currently on is sinking.

Those are all pretty obvious examples, but sometimes etiquette and decorum are a little more subtle. If you're not experienced in the ways of the venue you're in, you might not know all the unspoken rules. And you might find out the hard way. Cruise ships, for example, have their own very specific set of rules and regulations that guests should abide by.

On December 10, 2023, Royal Caribbean’s Serenade of the Seas set sail on the Ultimate World Cruise—a 274-day global trek that visits 11 world wonders and over 60 countries.


cruise, 9-month cruise, Marc Sebastian, cruise life, vacation, titanic, unspoken rules, etiquette, cruise etiquette, royal caribbean 9 months is a very long time to be aboard a boat, even a giant cruise ship. Photo by Peter Hansen on Unsplash

This incredible trip covered the Americas, Asia Pacific, Middle East, Mediterranean and Europe with a ticket price that ranges from $53,999 to $117,599 per passenger.

With such a unique and incredible offering, it's understandable that Royal Caribbean wanted to invite plenty of influencers to help them get the word out.

Aboard the Serenade to the Seas was popular TikToker Marc Sebastian, who documented his experience throughout the journey. In one video with over 4.3 million views, he revealed what he’s learned over his first few weeks aboard the ship; the biggest was the one word you’re not allowed to say.

"So here's [what] I've learned about cruising since I've spent 18 nights on this floating retirement home with a Cheesecake Factory attached. First, number one, you're not supposed to talk about the Titanic," he says in the clip.

Titanic! It's the ultimate taboo when you're on a giant ship traversing the ocean. Even after all these years, it's still too soon to make even lighthearted comparisons or jokes.

@marcsebastianf

someone get whoopi on the line girl i have some goss for her #ultimateworldcruise #worldcruise #serenadeoftheseas #cruisetok #cruise #9monthcruise #titanic

“Who knew that? I didn’t,” Sebastian said. “I brought it up to an entire room of people having lunch that our ship is only 100 feet longer than the Titanic — when I tell you that utensils dropped. Waiters gasped. It’s dead silent.”

Sebastian was flabbergasted. "It wasn't in the... handbook," he joked. "Not that I read the handbook, clearly."

After the unexpected reaction, his cruise friend told him, “You’re not allowed to talk about the Titanic.” It makes sense.

Who wants to be reminded of the tragedy that killed around 1,500 people while sinking one of the most impressive engineering feats of the era? More experienced cruisers chimed in that they were familiar with the unique piece of etiquette.

cruise, 9-month cruise, Marc Sebastian, cruise life, vacation, titanic, unspoken rules, etiquette, cruise etiquette, royal caribbean Pro tip: Don't ask the band on board to play "My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion Giphy

"When I went on a cruise, my mom told me saying Titanic was equivalent to screaming ‘bomb’ at an airport," Mikayla wrote in the comments.

"It’s like saying Macbeth in a theatre, it’s an unspoken rule" another commenter added.

"I’m sorry you’re telling me you had a Harry Potter like experience saying Voldemort at Hogwarts but it was the titanic on a modern day cruise I’m cryingggg" joked another.

Later in the video covering little known cruise facts, Sebastian admits he was surprised to learn that cruise ships have godmothers and that the pools are filled with seawater.

In an update from June of 2024, Sebastian explains that he only stayed on the cruise for 18 nights. He was not booked to stay throughout the entire voyage, and for him, that was a relief.

He initially jokes that he was kicked off the boat for saving a penguin that had jumped aboard. But in the end, he admits he was more than happy to deboard early.

"I walked off that ship not a happy man," he said, saying the ship was overstimulating and stressful. In another video, he films as the ship navigates the Drake Passage, one of the most notoriously dangerous and choppy stretches of water in the world. It looks stressful indeed, to say the least.

Cruising isn't for everyone, let alone for 274 days straight! But now Sebastian knows the golden rule for his next cruise.

This story originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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Watch Mary Tyler Moore sink a tricky pool shot, shocking everyone on set, including herself

How she and Dick Van Dyke managed to stay in character is remarkable.

FilmRise Television/YouTube (Public Domain)

This miraculous moment happened in Season 2, Episode 5 of The Dick Van Dyke Show.

Most of us have had moments where something completely unlikely happened that we wish had been caught on film. Have you ever dropped something in the bathroom, and when you tried to catch it, it bounced off your hand, onto the sink, into the wall, then right into the toilet? You couldn't replicate something like that even if you tried. All you can do is look around and ask, "Did anyone else see that?"

One of those seemingly impossible moments happened to Mary Tyler Moore while filming an episode of The Dick Van Dyke Show in 1962, but luckily, it was caught on film. The scene she and Dick Van Dyke were filming involved a tricky pool shot in which Mary Tyler Moore's character was supposed to hit three balls into three different pockets at once. The plan for the scene was to film Moore taking the shot, then cut to a shot of just the table where a professional pool player would actually make the shot, then cut back to Moore. But they didn't end up needing the pro player at all, much to everyone's surprise–including Moore herself.

@didyoucatchthis

The Unscripted Magic of Mary Tyler Moore on The Dick Van Dyke Show In a memorable 1962 episode of The Dick Van Dyke Show, a seemingly routine scene turned into an unforgettable moment of unscripted brilliance. In the episode, Laura Petrie, played by the iconic Mary Tyler Moore, wants to quit a game of pool to watch her favorite movie on TV. Her husband, Rob Petrie, played by Dick Van Dyke, convinces her to finish the game. Laura agrees, setting up for what was intended to be a clever camera trick. The plan was simple: the scene would cut away to a professional pool player making a difficult shot, then cut back to Laura as if she had made it herself. But then something incredible happened. Instead of relying on the professional, Mary Tyler Moore nailed the shot herself, completely unplanned. The genuine surprise and delight in her reaction—and Dick Van Dyke’s—made the moment feel all the more authentic and endearing. This unscripted success is a perfect example of the magic that made The Dick Van Dyke Show so special, blending impeccable acting, humor, and spontaneous brilliance into TV history.

The look on Moore's face says it all, but the fact that the two actors otherwise stayed in character is even more remarkable. Van Dyke didn't even flinch. Absolute legend. And shout out to the camera crew as well. The professionalism all around in that moment is a testament to everyone on set.

According to Slash Film, the show's editor, Bud Molin, explained in Vince Waldron's The Official Dick Van Dyke Show Book how the shot came to be. The shot was set up ahead of time, of course, but she was just supposed to make the balls go the right way. No one expected her to actually sink any of them, much less all three.

"We had it rigged so that she just had to hit the balls in the right general direction," Molin said. "It was just luck. She hit it, and she dropped every ball!"

Everyone was wowed, including Moore herself. She quickly picked her jaw up off the table, though, saving the scene so that the footage would be usable. And indeed, that take ended up being the one that made it into the "Hustling the Hustler" episode.

Watch the full scene from the beginning here (and note Van Dyke's unflappable reaction):

- YouTube youtu.be

The irony of the way the scene panned out is that Moore's character was supposed to surprise her husband and the audience with her pool prowess—just a little ol' housewife besting a man at a man's sport. The fact that she actually did it makes it all the better.

The Dick Van Dyke Show still ranks among the best sitcoms of all time, even seven decades after it aired.

More fun facts about The Dick Van Dyke Show

- The show aired for five seasons, from 1961 to 1966, and won a whopping 15 Emmy Awards.

- It was considered a pioneer in the sitcom genre, incorporating complexities of real life like parenting, sex, and societal issues in ways that previous sitcoms had not explored.

- Johnny Carson was among those in the running for the lead role that ultimately went to Dick Van Dyke due to his better name recognition at the time. Carson would become The Tonight Show host in 1962, a year after The Dick Van Dyke Show premiered.

johnny carson, the tonight show, dick van dyke show, talk show, television Johnny Carson was one of two finalists for Dick Van Dyke's role. Giphy

- Mary Tyler Moore had to fight to wear capri pants as the wardrobe choice made the network and advertisers nervous. However, she insisted that her character wear them and succeeded in shifting norms and expectations around women's clothing.

- Part of the show's success after it's second season (which almost didn't happen due to low ratings in the beginning) was the revolutionary idea to play reruns of the show during the summer. "That was one of the most creative things I ever did," said Carl Reiner, the show's director, according to John Kiesewetter. "Repeats back then were not a big thing. But I said, 'The people who have seen Perry Como will have a chance to sample us.' And it worked!"

- The catchy Dick Van Dyke Show theme song was an instrumental, but it actually had lyrics written by co-star of the show Morey Amsterdam. Watch Dick Van Dyke sing it in a 2011 interview onThe Rachael Ray Show :

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Reruns of The Dick Van Dyke Show can be found on various streaming services, and some full episodes that are in the public domain can be found on YouTube.

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Millennial history teacher explains the 3 phases of Gen X and why they were ‘forgotten’

"They just want to be left alone."

via Canva/Photos

A cassette tape from the '80s.

Generation X occupies an interesting time in history, for those who care to recognize that they actually exist. They were born between 1965 and 1980 and came into this world at an interesting inflection point: women were becoming a larger part of the workplace and divorce was at the highest point in history. This left Gen X to be the least parented generation in recent history.

Gen X was overlooked in their domestic lives and culturally were overshadowed by Baby Boomers with their overpowering nostalgia for Woodstock, The Beatles, and every cultural moment celebrated in Forest Gump. Once Boomer navel-gazing nostalgia began to wane, a much larger and over-parented generation, the Millennials, came on the scene.

“Whereas Boomers were the ‘me generation’ and millennials were the ‘me me me generation,’ Gen X has become the ‘meh’ generation,” Emily Stewart writes at Business Insider. But even if Gen X is a little aloof, that doesn’t mean they aren’t totally rad, awesome, trippindicular, and that it’d be bogus to define them any other way. To explain the unique history of Gen X and why they’re often overlooked, history teacher Lauren Cella created a timeline on TikTok to explain them to her Gen Z students..

@laurencella92

A love letter to Gen X from your millennial cousin🫶 Gen X didn’t start the fire, so after this I will just leave them alone because they do not care 🤣 But seriously for a generation that sometimes gets “forgotten” and stuck between the larger boomer or millennial cohorts, the genres they created paved the way for pop culture as we know it. I’m still not sure who let kids watch “The Day After” on TV or play on those hot metal playgrounds, but Gen X survived to tell the tale. Today, the so called “latchkey” kids, born 1965-1980 are actually super involved as parents, aunts, uncles, teachers (or maybe even grandparents)😉. Kids today want to say they are “built different” but I think Gen X is the one holding down that title because they grew up tough, they saw too much, they made it out, and they know exactly who they are and wouldn’t have it any other way.✌️ #g#genx

In Cella’s video, she divides Gen X into three distinct phases.

Phase 1: 1970s stagflation and changing families

“Gas shortages meant stagflation. So parents either both had to work or maybe they were divorced. So that meant microwave TV dinners and kids that sort of raised themselves,” Cella explains. “There was no parenting blogs, there was no after-school travel sports, emailing. Like, none of that existed. Bored? Go outside."


Phase 2: The neon ‘80s

“But then came the 1980s, where everything was big and loud. The hair, the bangs, the Reaganomics, mass consumerism (because now we can trade with China). The whole media just exploded,” Cella says. “But now we have TV, we have movies, we have TV, movies, home movies, TV movies, favorite TV movies, music, music, Videos, music, video, television. All these different genres and all these different cliques and all these different ways that you can express yourself.”


Phase 3: 1990s post-Cold War Skepticism

“Gen X sort of comes into the 1990s more sarcastic and skeptical,” Cella continues. “The Cold War ending meant that they rejected the excess of the eighties. And there's the shift. Grunge, indie, alternative, flannels, Docs [Doc Martins]. At this point, the technology is also exploding, but not like fun home media, but like corporate media. So there's this resistance to sell-out culture.”


Cella has a theory on why Gen X seems forgotten, and it’s not just because CBS News famously denied its existence. She believes that it comes down to Gen X’s inability to call attention to itself. “So Gen X is a bridge between these two larger, more storied generations. So it's not necessarily that they get forgotten. They don't really want the attention. They're kind of fine to just like, fly under the radar like they always have, because honestly, it's whatever.”

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I spent the day following people over 80 around and I could barely keep up

Their full social calendars might just be the secret to happiness.

Lauren Miller

A group of elderly people solve a puzzle.

As someone who wakes up, turns on the TV, eats a cookie, and then sits at my desk to write, some might say I'm rather sedentary. That is not the case for my mother and many of her friends at the senior living facility where they reside. In fact, I've never seen such an active group of people in my life—and most of them are in their 80s, 90s, and even 100s. Time and again, experts stress the importance of not only physical exercise and a healthy diet, but also mental stimulation in order to stay spry. Obviously, nothing can stave off the inevitable, but there are countless examples of people who swear by staying on the go to stay sharp well into old age.

Games keep their minds alert

My mom's posse starts early in the day with Mexican Train (a dominos game) and they mean business, as plenty play for money. This is popular among the residents, as is Bridge and Mahjong, the latter being where my mom truly shines. I sat in on a Mahjong game and watched as they laser-focused on the tiles in order to build a winning hand. Some of them wanted to use the time for chitchat, while others were a bit more rigid with the gameplay aspect. But as we left (after two hours) they all seemed much lighter in spirt.

A Texas A&M University School of Public Health research study reports, "Older people with mild cognitive impairment who engage in high levels of activities such as word games and hobbies have better memory, working memory, attention and processing speed than those who do not."

mahjong, senior living, puzzles, mental health, games, community A close up of a game of Mahjong Photo by Jason Leung on Unsplash


Group meetings help them stay engaged

Whether it's sitting together in the dining hall or attending an art class to bead a purse, the idea of being together seems to help the seniors' sense of belonging. Book club is especially popular (though I'm told it often gets heated) because they become exposed to literature that might have been outside their usual realm and discuss it in depth.

In 2024 Forbes published a piece about how senior citizens can stay young, healthy and fit, noting, "Regular social interactions, participating in community activities, and staying connected with loved ones can contribute to a sense of belonging, purpose, and happiness."

The National Institute of Aging reports that non-engagement can cause both mental and physical decline. They note, "Studies show that loneliness and social isolation are associated with higher risks for health problems such as heart disease, depression, and cognitive decline."

The seniors at my mom's home have sharp political discussions too. The facility brings in someone to make sure the residents are getting a balanced, non-partisan range of news from various outlets. I watched one of these meetings and it was encouraging to see seniors having civil discourse from all sides of the political spectrum.

There are also church and temple services for those who wish, and guided meditation groups (which my mom loves) where they're encouraged to write down their feelings.

One friend sits on what's called the Citizen Council to advocate for residents. "They meet often, and resolve nothing," my mother shadily notes, but still—it fills time and keeps them busy.

elderly, book club, senior living, staying active, seniors A book club meeting held at the senior living facility. Lauren Miller


Staying physically active

According to the Canadian Association Medical Journal, the elderly are not getting enough exercise by and large. Writer Kristen Fischer shares that, "In the United States, about 13.9% of adults aged 65 or more years meet federal physical activity guidelines for both aerobic and muscle-strengthening activities. Fischer also quotes Jane Thornton, MD, who is an associate professor at the Schulich School of Medicine and Dentistry in Ontario, saying, "“Physical activity is one of the most important ways to preserve or improve functional independence, including among older adults who are frail or deemed to be at increased risk of falling,”

To touch base with her younger self, my mom decided to create her own dance class. Having been a professional dancer (she danced with the Austin Ballet Company), she was missing that side of herself in her new home. Though she's now on a walker, as are many of the residents, that didn't stop her. With the help of a staff member, she created "Dances with Walkers," wherein she personally chose a hard beat-driven playlist so that people could dance with their walkers, scooters, and canes.

elderly, dancing, walkers, senior living, active A dance class for people on walkers. Lauren Miller


Just plain fun

One of my mom's friends said to me, plain and simple, "Just because we're older, doesn't mean we don't want to have a good time. I wake up every day and think I'm 30. Then I look in the mirror."

To that end, the gang is involved in monthly karaoke and weekly entertainment. "Tony Macaroni is often here," my mom shares. "As long as his hearing aids are working, he sounds great!"

Having purpose

In The Washington Post article "Centenarians share their longevity formula: 'Staying busy gives you purpose,' author Sydney Page writes that a 100-year-old woman took a part-time job at Home Depot and claims, "That's what keeps me sharp."

One of the commenters on this piece shared, "I once chatted with a woman who was volunteering at the local senior center. She did it, she said, to help out 'the old dears.' She was pushing 90 at the time."

Another writes, "Live till you die. Make the Reaper have to work to get his quota when you're on his list. Most of all, treat your body such that you'll be able to climb into the casket when it's your time."

elderly, senior living, staying active, seniors, home Residents of a senior facility enjoy a night out.Lauren Miller

This isn't to say all of this activity is easy. My mom, for example, is hard of hearing and can't see well. She gets tired easily and sometimes has to push beyond her exhaustion. This is part of what makes watching her (and many of her friends) so inspiring. They may see someone else when they look in the mirror, but when they're singing and dancing, the best parts of themselves reappear.

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Gen Z debates 'The Taxicab Theory' and their thoughts on love might change the game

Relationship theories like this could be problematic.

Photo Credit: Canva

Taxicab light is on. Two people enjoy a romantic date.

The theory was simple, as many ideas from the hit HBO show Sex and the City were. To paraphrase Miranda Hobbes (portrayed by Cynthia Nixon), men are like taxicab lights. When they settle down, it's never actually about the person they wind up with—it's all a matter of timing and when their "cab light is on."

In a recent article for Verywell Mind, author Ariane Resnick explains, "The taxicab theory (also known as the taxi light theory) is an idea that centers around men and claims that they commit, or not, based on timing." Resnick then quotes therapist Afton Turner, LPCA, who claims, "The taxicab theory explains when a man decides he is ready to get married, it’s like he is turning on his cab light—he is signaling that he’s available and open to commitment. At that point, it’s less about who he’s with and more about the timing; he’s ready to pick up the next waiting passenger and marry them."

What Miranda (or rather the show's writers) says exactly is: "Men are like cabs. When they're available, their light goes on. They wake up one day and decide they're ready to settle down, have babies, whatever. And then they turn their light on. The next woman they pick up, boom, that's the one that they'll marry. It's not fate. It's dumb luck."

A clip from season three of Sex and the City discussing Taxi Cab Theory. www.youtube.com, Matchacarbonara

This episode was released in 2000, when much of Gen X was settling down or in the crux of dating. Many of us took the monologue as a cute throwaway scene in a lighthearted comedy. It was just the kind of thing you post on a blog and then carry on with your life. It’s obviously reductive and, as Resnick writes, "problematic" for many reasons. Mainly, it's an odd thing to attribute only to men and it’s a laughable generalization.

Gen Z has some questions on the theory and topic at large, which spark healthy debates on TikTok.

On the "First Round’s on Me" app's TikTok page, a woman is asked, "What is the best dating advice you’ve ever received?" She echoes the taxicab theory, answering, "My dad told me last year that men either have their light on or they have it off. I have dated for two years straight and every man's light was off. And I was always chasing."

@firstroundsonmeapp

Do YOU believe taxi cab theory?😏 #nyc #fyp #dating #date #datingapp #firstroundsonme #single #datingadviceforwomen #datingadviceformen #relationship #love #ots #interview

The interviewer confirms, "Men are like taxicabs. If the light is off, don’t try to get in."

"Don’t even try," she continues. "But when their light is on, be ready."

In the comment section, a few offer their own advice. But many agree with the sentiment. "Great advice," more than one person writes.

But over on @BlackRyanSeacrest’s TikTok page, he debunks the theory. He especially pushes back on the idea that men don’t choose the "perfect woman" if their light is off. He asks, "Perfect according to who? The other women or to him? Because I promise you if she was perfect for him, he’d be with her."

@blackryanseacrest

The taxi cab theory isn’t real #fyp #dating #men #women #foryou

He lets the clip continue, then shares, "The taxicab theory is basically a stage three coping mechanism. It’s basically saying, ‘You know how that guy rejected you? It’s completely okay and has nothing to do with you. Because in reality, he’s not ready for a relationship and when he is, he’s just gonna pick some random woman in front of his face that he doesn’t care about.’"

He goes on to scold the idea that men have no feelings or thoughts and are merely guided by an unseen, vague readiness. He also points out that women are also capable of merely "coasting in a relationship just because they want to be in a relationship—even though the guy is completely lackluster."

Here, the comments are also quite supportive of the content creator. "Also, if he isn’t ready to be in a relationship, even if this hypothetical woman is perfect for him, THAT is healthy!"

sex and the city, carrie bradshaw, taxi cab theory, relationships Carrie attempts to flirt by winking. Giphy Warner Brothers, HBO Max

One person pushes back: "But then why do men date a woman for 6 or 7 years saying he's not ready for marriage, just to marry a girl one year into the relationship after his last relationship ended? Even if you say he just fell in love, imagine being the girl he left."

Another debates this idea: "This might surprise you, but those two women are in fact not the same person. There was something about woman 2 that brought him peace in his life."

The bottom line is that simplifying love and partnership—no matter the gender, sexual preference, or otherwise—minimizes the importance of chemistry. Sure, maybe timing has something to do with where we end up, but not always. In their latest piece for Pure Wow, editor Sydney Meister writes, "Because in a culture obsessed with finding the ideal match—often one that may not even exist—‘settling’ has become synonymous with ‘giving up.’ Yet, could it be that it’s not about giving up on connection, but redefining our expectations of commitment?"


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